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It's been three months since the war. Katsuki and Izuku have become closer, by default.
Izuku lies on his bed, pulling out his phone. He always facetimes Katsuki before bed; originally they disguised it as a way for them to watch each other take their medication, to know they were taking it, but now, although unspoken, they call so they’re the last thing they see before they sleep. To know the other is safe.
He opens up his chat to "Kacchan", sending a simple: "Hey. Can we facetime now?", and sets his phone down, staring at it as he awaits a notification.
As soon as his phone vibrates he picks it up, and reads the message,
"No. Mom wants time with me. Give it half an hour."
Izuku sighs slightly, a little frustrated.
"Do you know what she wants?"
He watches the three dots as Katsuki types, counting thirteen times they bounce on the screen.
"We’re watching a movie."
He rolls his eyes. He's relieved she wants to spend time with him, and that Katsuki isn't shutting himself in his room all day, like he was for a week after the war. At the same time, this means he has to wait. He types fast.
"Okay but as soon as the movie is over i wanna facetime you"
He gets back a fast, "I'll tell her." the dots indicating he was typing barely showed up, this time. He's impatient, a little needy, but can't help it. He was looking forward to talking to Kacchan tonight.
He types, "You better. I miss talking to you" and lets his finger hover over the send button, as it was only yesterday they talked. He sends it with the knowledge that they've talked every night since the war, every night for three months.
He gets back a quick, "Of course. Talk later nerd.", which causes his previous hesitation to be replaced with a smile. He types back "see you later", and then closes the chat, waiting for the thirty minutes to pass by.
He watches the clock on his bedside, the scrolling on his phone interrupted by constant glances at it as he counts down the minutes. At the exact minute that marks thirty, he opens his phone and types in their chat
"Movie done yet?"
The message was seen as soon as it was sent, meaning Katsuki had opened the chat too. The realisation turns Izuku's anticipation into fondness.
He reads, "yeah im heading upstairs", and types a quick "hurry up" before turning on his lamp and sitting back against the headboard.
He answers the call with a smile, before even seeing Katsuki's face.
"You took your time."
The boy on the other end smiles at him through the screen, and mumbles,
"Shut up."
Izuku laughs at the sound of his voice, the first time he’d laughed today.
"I missed your dumb face.."
He trails off as his eyes map out the scar adoring Katsuki's cheek.
Katsuki gets on his bed, positioning his phone so Izuku can see his face, lying on his side. Izuku's heart leaps as he watches him get comfy on the bed, like he's putting himself on show just for him. He can't help but smile again, feigning an itchy nose as an attempt to hide his reddening cheeks.
"You look sleepy."
Katsuki watches him, smiling. It's calm, and he's relaxed. His cheeks look chubbier when he relaxes, Izuku notes, although he's known that fact for years. Softly, Katsuki speaks,
"I am. My scar’s healed, pretty much."
Izuku nods, his mind fleeting back to the harrowing injury Katsuki faced, over his heart. Even though he'd been recovering, slowly and steadily, he still felt worry build up in his chest at the mention.
"Yeah? No more pain at all?"
Katsuki has been suffering a dull, toothache-type ache over his chest for a while. His physical therapist gave him a balm for it. Izuku watches as he pulls off his shirt, showing him the scar over his heart. His eyes widen slightly at the sight, his breath catching in his throat as his eyes lock on the scar, the evidence of the damage he'd seen countless times before. The sight of it causes hurt and guilt to rise in his chest. It wouldn't have happened if he wasn’t late. He was late.
The word "fine" rips him from his thoughts. Kacchan's fine. He watches as the boy trails his fingers over the scar. He sees how the touch affects the skin, how the jagged edges of the scar become more prominent as he moves.
The words spill out subconsciously before he can stop them,
"Still looks pretty bad…"
He trails off, the guilt rising. He was late.
Katsuki sees his eyebrows furrowed, his guilt ridden face through the screen. A mass of pixels he can’t reach, touch, comfort.
"Not your fault, Izuku."
Izuku sighs as quiet as he can, guilt melting off his face at his words. He can't help the fact that it lingers in his heart, a permanent reminder on Kacchan's chest of what happened that day. He was late.
"I know… I know it's not my fault. I just… feel bad."
He hears a sigh from Katsuki, his attention snapping from his chest to the boy’s face. His eyes dart to the scar, before meeting his eyes.
"Don’t. I'm still me. I'm still here."
He nods, reassured by Katsuki's words. He knows he's healthy and alive and well, albeit marked forever.
"That's true. I'm happy you're still here with me."
A quick "yeah" slips from Katsuki's lips. They both look at each other through the scene, the silence falling over them like a blanket. Comfort. It's not awkward in the slightest.
Izuku feels a tug in his heart.
"...I missed you."
It's soft, and quiet. Just loud enough for the mic to pick it up.
With no hesitation, Katsuki speaks, a little louder.
"I missed you too."
Izuku can't help the smile that tugs on his lips at his words. He’d missed Kacchan so much, he'd been so lonely without him next to him. His next words slip out before he can stop them, like butter in the heat.
"I miss waking up next to you."
Katsuki's demeanour softens. The thought, "Chubby cheeks" flashes through Izuku's mind.
"Me too. You can sleep here tonight. Or I can go to yours."
His heart skips a beat as he processes Katsuki's words. He'd been hoping that he'd offer, but didnt think he had a chance this late at night. Their last sleepover was two days ago, but it felt like he'd been waiting for another for ages.
"...really? You’d come over? Or I could come to yours… Kacchan.. It's 10PM."
Ignoring the mention of the time, Katsuki cracks a small smile.
"Yeah, anything you want. I know your mom gets anxious when you leave the house for too long."
His face dims, having previously been lit up at the mention of his mom’s anxiety. It had worsened since the war, considerably.
"...I'd like for you to come here, if you can. I don't want to have to leave the house too late."
He smiles a little wider at the promise of Izuku's house. Izuku's room, his smell.
"Give me 20."
Izuku smiles as he watches him say it through the screen, happiness quickly overriding his previous worry.
"20 minutes?"
His smile fuels Katsuki's.
"Yeah, my dad will drop me off. I think I already have clothes at your place. I'll just bring a toothbrush."
Izuku feels excitement vibrate through his body at the fact he and Kacchan are going to have another night together. He's looking forward to his presence next to him in the bed.
"Okay, I'll see you in 15 minutes."
"Izuku, wait."
The words stop him from ending the call, his finger hovering over the button. He holds the phone back up so he can see him.
"What is it?"
He sees Katsuki's face, still calm. Everything’s okay.
"I want another shirt. I'll bring yours back, the one I left your place in last time. I was using it as a pillowcase, but it doesn't smell like you anymore."
A blush creeps up his neck and reaches his cheeks, and he lets out a small, breathless laugh as he hears his reasoning. He shows him his shirt, plain blue.
"This one? You want me to give you the one I'm wearing now?"
He watches Katsuki's features, and notes a light dusting of pink on his face.
"Mm. Yeah."
A warmness fills Izuku's heart as he can tell he really wants the shirt he’s wearing. He watches Katsuki's cheeks go red as he realises the other knows of his reaction.
"Aww, you're blushing. You really want it."
There’s rustling from the other end; Katsuki getting out of bed.
"Shut up. My dad’s dropping me off."
He laughs again as he hears his flustered tone, watching him try to hide his reddened face.
"Okay, Kacchan. See you in a bit then."
He ends the call and touches the fabric of his shirt over his abdomen, focusing how the thin fabric feels against his skin as he smiles to himself. He can only imagine Kacchan later, putting it over his pillow, holding it close and smelling him as he drifts off to sleep.
A few minutes later, he finds himself getting impatient and antsy as he paces around the room, waiting for Katsuki to arrive. He can't wait to have him again, to have his arms around him again. He glances at his phone and the clock every few minutes, waiting.
He perks up instantly as the doorbell rings, a spark of excitement in his heart as he realises it's finally time. He practically runs to the front door, leaving a rushed explanation to his mom that Katsuki will be sleeping over again.
He opens the door, and his heart stutters in his chest. He looks exactly how he did over the phone, calm and smiling, the night breeze of the summer causing his blond spikes to twitch. He’s been craving Kacchan's physical contact while they were apart, the two days feeling longer.
Katsuki latches onto him as soon as he steps through the door, leaving it open as he pushes Izuku's back against the wall, gentle. Ever since the war ended, they've been touching constantly, a way to confirm they’re really here, really okay..
Izuku quickly wraps his arms around him in a warm embrace, pulling him close. His craving is satisfied, the length of the two days they were apart dissipating into nothing as they breathe each other in.
Katsuki breathes in the scent of his hair, relishing in it. He uses whatever his mom uses, it smells like Izuku, and linen. He’d buy it as a spray and use it everyday if he could. It's not fair that it's a scent that only exists away from him.
Izuku closes his eyes and relishes in the feeling of Kacchan burying his face in his hair. He can't believe how things have become between them, this solidarity of love, everything they were made for. He wants to cherish the feel of their bodies pressed together, his back against the wall. The chill of the summer air filtering through the open door goes unnoticed. He can feel his skin through the fabric of his shirt, an obstacle. He savours the feeling of their bodies, not wanting to let go just yet, one more minute.
Reluctantly, he lets go of Kacchan and looks up at his face, fighting the urge to glance down at the way his hands have settled on his waist. He takes in the face before him, the familiarity of it. He loves looking at Kacchan, the scar on his face doing nothing to change the beauty of it. He smiles up at him, his heart feeling warm and light.
He breaks the silence, speaking quietly in the hallway.
"I missed cuddling with you."
Katsuki softens, impossibly. Izuku's heart melts.
"I know. Me too. I brought some of my mom’s leftovers here for Inko."
Izuku nods silently as he listens to kastuki’s soft words.
"That's nice, Kacchan. She’ll like that. You brought pyjamas, right?"
Katsuki's expression turns slightly sheepish, he’d assumed he had clothes here.
"Uh… no. Just a toothbrush."
He laughs quietly as he hears that, of course he didn't. There are clothes of his here, but Izuku won't tell him that. He wants to see Kacchan in his.
"Just a toothbrush? You're going to have to borrow mine."
Katsuki smiles, feeling glad there's no other option.
"Alright. I want the shittiest pair of All Might ones you have."
Izuku laughs a little louder at the request, amused at the thought of Kacchan in All Might pyjamas. He shakes his head fondly in disbelief.
"Alright, okay. But the shittiest pair I have? Really?"
Katsuki presses his hand to the side of his face, stroking his thumb over his cheek gently, brushing over his scar. He goes into the kitchen to give Inko the food, and Izuku watches. He touches his hand to his face, as if trying to replicate the feeling of Katsuki's hands on him he loves so much, craves every day. A part of him is a little envious watching his mother fuss over Katsuki, and call him "sweetheart." He goes down the hall to his room, sitting on the bed as he waits.
As soon as Katsuki enters the room, he shuts the door and gets on the bed, wrapping his arms around Izuku. He pulls Izuku close and they lay on their sides, he feels him lean into his touch. They relax in each other's holds, at the comfort and safety of being in each other’s arms again.
Izuku rests his head on Katsuki's shoulder, and teases with a quiet laugh,
"You're so clingy… even more than me."
He gets a mumbled "Mmm" in response, the sound muffled by his shoulder. The thought that Kacchan's lips are on his skin passes through his mind, and his cheeks go up a colour as he chuckles as he feels his arms tighten around him. He loves being held tight, knowing he wants to be close to him, near to him. He puts his other hand on the back of Katsuki's head, running his fingers through soft blond spikes.
"‘Zuku…"
He smiles at the soft murmur of his name, feeling it against his shoulder. He continues playing with his impossibly soft hair, caressing his head.
"Hmm? What is it?"
He hears a soft sigh in response, and he pauses for a moment. He looks down at him from where he’s resting his head on his shoulder, trying to make out an expression on his face.
"You okay…?"
Katsuki shifts to look up at him, tears brimming in his eyes. Izuku feels a bout of emotion rise up in his chest as he sees the tears, and expression on his face. He cups Katsuki's cheek with a scarred hand.
"Hey, hey… what’s wrong? Why are you crying?
A quiet, broken cry escapes his lips as he looks up at Izuku and blinks; his eyes, once sharp, now glassed over.
"Izu… don’t leave me…"
He's caught off guard by the boy’s words, and the pleading, broken tone. The desperation in it makes his heart ache.
"What… what do you mean? I'm right here… I'm not going anywhere…"
Izuku is met with Katsuki holding him tighter, tucking his head under his chin. He feels his arms tighten around him, so desperate he can feel the despair through it. He hugs back just as tight, stroking his hair, reassuring him with his touch.
"Shhh, it's okay… I'm right here… I'm not going anywhere, I promise..."
A quiet sob breaks out of Katsuki, through shallow breaths he manages to find the words he needs.
"The nightmares…"
Izuku feels cold horror shoot through him at the words, he knows exactly what he means.
"Shhh, it's okay.. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere, I promise. I'm right here."
He repeats the words, almost as desperate as Katsuki's hold, as if subconsciously trying to reassure himself too. His heart aches at the thought of Kacchan having nightmares about losing him, he knows all too well what that feels like. He hugs him tighter, trying to comfort and soothe him. Guilt begins to consume him for being the reason Kacchan has to relive that experience over and over in his mind while he sleeps. The only thing stopping it from consuming him completely is the fact that he has to be okay, for him.
"Shhh, it's okay.... it was just a nightmare. I'm here, I'm alive, I'm right here..."
Katsuki's sobs slow down, but they're still there, still shaking his scarred body.
"Almost every night.. I just wake up cold and shaking and sweating.. Seeing you.. Your arms ripped off.."
A shudder runs through him as he hears the description, his own heart clenching in horror as he verbalises it. He rubs a hand on his back, trying to comfort him the best he can through touch and words.
"Shhh… Oh, god, I'm so sorry.. I'm so sorry, I'm okay… I'm right here, I'm alive. You don't have to worry…"
Being shushed gently and held by Izuku allows his head to clear, more words to form.
"When you hold me… I know your arms are there…"
Izuku feels his heart ache again or the boy in his arms, he can't imagine how many times he’s woken up terrified and panicked, how he's laid awake in his bed alone, awaiting a comfort that won't come until morning.
"Yeah.. Yeah, my arms are here.. they're safe and whole, see? And I'll keep holding you like this all night, every night. I'll keep you safe, I promise.."
Katsuki starts to cry on him, his nose on the base of his neck. His cries are weak and slow, and it's evident he's tired. So tired. Izuku holds him tighter, if possible, feeling him shake as he cries. He kisses the top of his head and speaks softly,
"Shhh.. it's okay.... I'm here... I'm not going anywhere, I promise. I've got you.. I'll hold you and keep you safe all night, I promise..."
He continues to murmur comforting words, sentences broken by occasional kisses, in an attempt to soothe the other boy’s fears.
"I'll hold you too, Izuku. Never want to let you go."
Izuku tightens his arms around him, hugging him close to his chest as he speaks between kisses to his head,
"Yeah, yeah. Hold me all you want.. I don't mind at all.. I love being held.. I'll never leave you, I promise.."
The tension visibly begins to melt from Katsuki's body.
"I'll never leave… you…"
Izuku feels a small burst of warmth bloom in his chest at the boy’s words, his heart filling with love and safety as he hears them.
"I know.. I know you won't. I'm never going anywhere, I'll always be right here, right in your arms.. right by your side.."
Katsuki hums, low in his throat, and mumbles into his chest,
"Mmm… Love you, ‘Zuku…"
He smiles warmly as he listens to him mumble against his shirt, a stark contrast compared to the earlier atmosphere of the room. At the quiet confession of love, he rubs a hand over his back as he responds in a tender whisper,
"I love you too.. so much.. I love you more than anything in the world, Kacchan.."
They stay like that for a while, just holding each other tightly, and Izuku listening to Katsuki breathe. He continues to rub his back, play with his hair and murmur words of reassurance, reminding him over and over that he’s here and they're together. He can only imagine how often the nightmares have kept him up at night, it feels strange to be the one offering comforting words to Kacchan instead of it being the other way around.
He eventually shifts, pulling away slightly to look at him, his heart aching in a familiar way as he sees tears rolling down his cheeks, painting over old tear tracks.
"Hey... look at me, okay? I'm right here. I'm right here with you.."
Katsuki brings a hand up to wipe his face, and talks quietly.
"I've been throwing up. Thinking about.. How you felt when they were taken.. Your arms. And I see it, in so much detail.. I just throw up…"
Izuku feels a wave of cold dread wash over him at his words. It pains him to think that Kacchan has to think about such gruesome things, and that he's been making himself sick with nightmares about it.
"Shhh.. hey, hey.. don't think about that, okay? Don't think about any of it, just think about me.. I'm here, my arms are here, they're okay.."
Katsuki looks up at him, putting a hand on one of his arms.
"It makes my pills shitty, they need... A full stomach to work."
He feels another pang of dread as he hears him talk about the pills. He had a feeling they were struggling to work, and now he knows why.
"Yeah... yeah, you need to eat, okay? Don't skip meals, you need to eat enough so they can do their job.."
Katsuki huffs in light frustration, and looks up at him desperately and tiredly. He shakes his head.
"I don’t skip, I just throw it up."
Izuku's face contorts into a worried one, he didn't realise he was doing it involuntarily, and often enough for it to stop his pills working enough.
"Kacchan, that's not healthy. You need to keep at least some food down.."
He shakes his head dismissively, he already knows.
"I know, I try. It's just an endless cycle of.. Fucking stupid.. It's just stupid."
He can feel a small spike of anger in his chest, but it's not at Kacchan, it's at his mental state. it's at the thought of how much this stupid war has screwed over his life and his mind.
"No, it's not stupid.. you're trying your best, okay? I know it's hard, I know it's not easy, but you're doing good.. you've gotten so much better over the past few months.."
Katsuki rests his head back under Izuku's chin.
"I know. Just.. I throw up, so they don't work, which makes me throw up more, and it's… bullshit."
He feels his heart ache for him, knowing that he's been trapped in this vicious cycle of taking the pills to counteract the nightmares, to help him stay grounded and well, and then the same nightmares being so graphic he throws up any food he puts into his stomach.
"Yeah... yeah, that does sound like bullshit.."
He runs a scarred hand through his hair, trying to soothe him through touch.
"That's a shitty cycle to be in.. You need to eat in order to take the pills and have them work, and you also need to take the pills so you don't keep having the nightmares that prevent you from keeping food down. it's like you're stuck between a rock and a hard place.."
He continues holding him close and rubbing his back, listening to his slow breathing.
"How bad are the nightmares, Kacchan? How often do you get them?.. be honest.."
Katsuki sighs, breathing in Izuku's scent deeper before he continues as if to ground himself.
"Just… they’re shit. Sometimes I don't even get them. My mom holds me to sleep, and I don't get them… but sometimes I do."
He sighs, his heart aching at the thought of Kacchan needing his mom to hold him to sleep sometimes so that he doesn't get the nightmares.
"Yeah, okay, okay... and how bad are they?... You said you're seeing me in the nightmares, right?.. you see me, my arms being… torn off..."
Katsuki nods against him, his nose rubbing against his Adam's apple.
"Just… its that. And i wasn't there at the time, i was… Dead."
He nods in understanding as he listens to the boy describe the nightmares, although it's fragmented. He knows exactly which memory Kacchan is seeing and he can only imagine how bad it is to get it stuck on a loop forever.
"Yeah.. yeah, I know, Kacchan.. I'm sorry you have to relive it all over again.. I wish I could make them stop.."
Katsuki shakes his head and smiles against his neck, small and faint.
"You can… you do. I’ve never had one here."
Izuku feels a small burst of warmth at Kacchan's words, feeling his smile.
"Yeah?.. you don't get them here?.. with me?"
He shakes his head.
"Never have. You’d know if I had, I never leave your arms."
He nods, thinking about the times they've spent the night together. He doesn't ever remember him waking up sweaty and terrified. For some reason, the nightmares don't catch up to him when they're together.
"Yeah.. yeah, that's true... I guess I would..."
"And when you stay at mine... I don't get them."
A small smile spreads on his face as he hears that he's able to help keep the nightmares away for the Kacchan, wherever they are.
"Really?.. you don't get them when we sleep at your place either?.. that's good then.."
Katsuki sighs, the comfort of the moment fading.
"But I'm gonna have to sleep on my own. And deal with it. And I know it's only been three months since the war, and people say "it'll happen with time" but that's just bullshit.. I want it now."
He nods as he listens to him speak, a pang of dread in his heart as he hears that he'll have to sleep alone. He knows it's unavoidable, but the thought of the other boy being tormented by the same nightmare over and over again by himself in his room every night fills him with dread. He's silent as he processes the boy's words for a moment before he responds quietly,
"I know... I know. It... it'll take time. It sucks saying that, but… It'll happen. I know you want it now, but it won't happen right now. These things... they take time to heal sometimes. They can be slow and painful.. It sucks that you have to wait, but there's nothing we can really do..."
He runs a hand through his hair again, trying to comfort and soothe him through touch. He hears Katsuki's voice break, filled with emotion.
"Izuku.. I don't know what I would have done if you never got them back. Never feeling your arms around me.."
Izuku feels his heart ache as he listens to him speak, hearing the quiet desperation in his voice. He knows how much the boy needs him, needs his touch, needs his presence.
"Shhh, hey.. hey.. don't think about that. It doesn't matter. You don't need to think about it because it didn't happen, okay?.. I have my arms and I'm here. I'm here and I'm never leaving you..."
He hugs him tighter, holding him close. He knows that it's a thought that probably haunts his mind, the one thing that he can imagine hurting him the most.
"Even if I somehow lost my arms again.. I'd find another way to hold you, okay? I'll always find a way to hold you... I'll never stop finding a way to be by your side.."
Katsuki gags, clasping a hand around his mouth. He sits up suddenly, and Izuku's arms fall around his waist.
He instantly feels worried.
"Kacchan? Hey.. are you okay? Are you gonna throw up..?"
He shakes his head no, and breathes through his nose for a few seconds, before nodding yes.
Izuku's heart sinks, and he feels worried realising he got nauseous just from the conversation. It doesn't even take a nightmare for him to get to this point. He guides him off the bed, and they walk to the bathroom.
"Hey, okay.. It's okay, you're okay. Come on… come on, let's head to the bathroom."
They make it to the bathroom and he guides him inside, over to the toilet.
"Okay.. sit down.. here, sit on the floor, come on.."
He helps the boy sit down next to the toilet, his heart clenching as he sees his pale face. He watches as Katsuki moves his hand from his face and heaves before throwing up.
"It's okay... just try to breathe and don't panic. It'll be okay, just let it out..."
His heart sinks as he hears him continue, his body shaking and gagging. Izuku continues rubbing his back in a soothing manner, trying to make the experience more bearable for him.
"You're okay... just let it out... it'll be over soon..."
He continues to rub his back as Katsuki throws up, doing his best to keep him calm and comfortable. He knows it probably doesn't feel good for him, but there's not much he can do.
"Shhh.. it's okay.. you're doing good, you're doing okay.."
He watches him rest his forehead on the toilet bowl as he finishes, panting, his breaths laboured and shallow. His heart aches for him, he can't bear to see him like this, but he knows there's nothing else he can do right now.
"Hey.. you alright?.. Are you done throwing up?.."
He listens out for any form of indication, and hears a "Mmm" and an attempt at a nod from Katsuki.
He quickly leaves the bathroom and returns with a glass of cold water, kneeling beside Katsuki and holding it up to his lips, watching as he sips it, watching his spent movements intently. After a few sips he takes it from him, and finishes the glass from the side where his lips didn’t touch.
"Hey... come on, we gotta get you in the shower, okay?.. it'll make you feel a bit better.."
They stand up, and he watches as the boy takes off his shirt, seeing the scar over his heart. it's a stark reminder of all the pain and trauma he's been through, and his heart clenches in his chest as he sees it.
Katsuki notices his expression, and gets his breathing under control before responding,
"'s fine.. Izuku.."
He nods again, his eyes tracing over the scar on the boy's chest. He was late.
"Yeah, yeah, I know. I know that, and I know it means you're alive, I just.. I hate seeing it... every time I see it, it just.. reminds me how much you've been hurt...how I wasn't there.."
He distracts himself by turning on the shower, the sound of the water hitting the bottom of the tub drowning out their breathing.
"You're here," Katsuki states as he begins taking off his clothes, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
He can see Katsuki's bare form now, standing in front of him, wearing only his boxers. the sight of his scars and his muscles only serve to remind him even more of the other boy's pain and trauma. He was late.
"Yeah.. yeah, I'm here now. I'm always here now.. it just.. it hurts to see that scar on you.., knowing that it means you were hurt.."
He swallows hard as he watches the other boy pull down his boxers, leaving him completely naked in front of him. His body is covered in scars and marks, a clear reminder of all the pain he's endured. Although he’s getting in the shower, Izuku murmurs,
"Come on.. get in the shower.. There we go, you're doing great…"
Katsuki stands under the stream, recovering from the harsh vomiting earlier. Izuku watches him move, watches his body. He looks over at him, not fully turning his head.
"Izuku… stay here."
He nods in response, his eyes never leaving the boy in the shower.
"Yeah, yeah, I'll stay right here.. don't worry, I'm not going anywhere, okay?.. I'll be right here.."
He watches as the boy stands under the spray of the water, his body getting washed by the stream. He feels a pang of pain in his heart as he sees the other boy's scars being cleaned, knowing the pain and trauma they represent. He was late.
"Izuku…"
He’s snapped out of his thoughts upon hearing his name, spoken softly. He looks at him, still watching him under the spray of water.
"Yeah?.. what is it?.. What do you need?.. what's wrong?"
Katsuki reaches his wet hands out, lifting off his shirt slowly. Izuku feels the boy's wet hands reach out and tug at his shirt, lifting it over his head. He's surprised for a moment, but he quickly gives in, letting the other boy strip him.
He's now shirtless as well, and he takes off his pants and boxers. feels the boy's wet hands on his body. He feels a mix of emotions as he looks at the other boy, their naked bodies in close proximity to each other, but not much seems to matter.
He looks down at the boy's body, admiring the scars and marks that tell the story of his strength and resilience. he hears the water running down his bare skin, the droplets mingling with Katsuki's sweat, creating a sense of intimacy between them, the only thing separating them being the ceramic of the tub.
Upon hearing a whispered, "come in…" fall from Katsuki's lips, he pauses for a moment, feeling a flutter in his chest, before nodding and stepping into the shower. The warm water immediately washes over his skin, the spray hitting his bare back and running down his body.
He feels Kacchan's wet arms wrap around him, pulling him into an embrace. He can feel his naked body against his, their skin making contact as they stand together under the spray of water. He wraps his arms around the boy, holding him close, his hands rubbing small circles on his wet back. He can feel the warmth of his body, and the rise and fall of his chest against his own. He can feel his scar. He was late.
The water continues to run over them, the sound of the cascade filling the silence. Izuku holds Katsuki close, feeling the other boy's heartbeat against his own, their breaths mingling together. The silence is broken by Katsuki speaking in an impossibly soft tone against Izuku's shoulder.
"Izuku…"
He feels the boy speak, hearing his name spoken softly. he looks up at him, their faces only inches apart.
"Yeah?.. what is it?.. What do you need?.. talk to me.."
"Just… stay."
He nods, his heart filling with compassion and tenderness as he hears the boy's soft words. he tightens his grip around him, his arms embracing him firmly, as he speaks gently,
"Yeah.. yeah, I know... I know my arms are here.. I'm holding you. I'm holding you tight in my arms.. you're safe.. okay?.. you're safe.."
He feels the his against his own, the press of his skin against his skin, and the weight of his head against his shoulder. He can feel his heart beating in time with Kacchan's, the sound of the water and the steady rhythm of their heartbeats creating a soothing atmosphere, and they've never wanted more, they've never felt complete like they do now, in this moment.
Izuku starts to wash Katsuki's hair, massaging the shampoo through his wet spikes, feeling the silky strands between his fingers. He works his fingers in gentle, circular motions, his touch tender and caring.
He can see the other boy's eyes close. his head resting on his shoulder under the spray of water. He continues to wash his hair, the suds running down his neck and back, making the boy's skin slick and smooth.
He can feel Katsuki's body relax completely, the tension leaving his muscles as he washes his hair. He continues to massage the boy's scalp, his fingers moving gently over his head, taking his time to make sure each strand of hair is clean. He’s meticulous and thorough, wanting to make sure Kacchan feels relaxed and cared for.
Katsuki basks in the intimacy, never wanting it to end. He whispers quiet words, they come out broken, he's consumed by the sensation.
"Love.. you…"
He drops to his knees, his hands moving to Kacchan's hips, rubbing them gently. His heart clenches as he sees the boy looking down at him, and feels his hands on his shoulders, his eyes downcast, as he continues his warm and soothing touch. He moves his hands over his hips, tracing his fingers over the boy's skin, trying to convey his love and care through his touch. He can see the boy's breathing slow down, his muscles relax under his hands, and he knows he's having a calming effect on him.
As soon as he stands up, Katsuki's arms wrap back around him. He feels his hands on his back, the suds and water running down his skin as Katsuki begins to wash him too. He leans into the touch, his body melting under the boy's gentle touch, his gentle hands. The hands that once hurt, pushed, grabbed him out of menace and torment, with the intent to bully. His Kacchan. His hands.
He feels Kacchan's fingers in his hair, massaging the shampoo through the wet strands, the touch tender and soothing. he closes his eyes, enjoying the feeling of the boy's hands on his head, the gentle pressure and the warm water creating a sensation he’d never quite felt before.
He feels his fingers tracing over the scar on his head, the touch gentle and loving. He feels him massaging the soap into the short hair on the side where he had to have it shaved, and feels a sense of comfort and reassurance from his touch. He’s pulled back from his thoughts when Katsuki's quiet voice interrupts the silence.
"Do you hate it?"
Izuku shakes his head, his eyes still closed as he speaks softly.
"No... no, I don't hate it. not at all.. the scar doesn't change anything for me.. it's just a part of me now, a part of my story.. a reminder of what I've gone through.."
"Your hair…"
He nods, his eyes still closed, feeling the boy's fingers still in his hair.
"Yeah, yeah.. the hair, it'll grow back.. it's just... a minor inconvenience, really.. I can deal with the short hair until it grows back.."
Katsuki smiles, as he continues his movements.
"It needs to hurry up.. So I can feel it again."
He opens his eyes and looks at the boy, a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
"Yeah, it does need to hurry up, huh?.. I can't wait till you can run your fingers through my hair.. I’ve never felt your hands in my hair.."
Katsuki smiles, and runs his fingers through the wet hair on the side that wasn't shaved.
"I can run my fingers through.. This side."
He feels the boy's fingers running through his hair, the sensation sending a shiver down his spine. He smiles at his words.
"Yeah.. yeah, you can.. but it's not the same.. it doesn't feel the same as if you’d run your fingers through both sides, through all of it, it just.. feels different.. I miss all my hair.."
Katsuki smiles as he gets the shampoo out, being as gentle as he can..
"I know…"
Izuku looks at the boy, feeling a pang of tenderness in his heart.
"Yeah, I know you do.. I know you miss it too.. It won't be long till it grows back, I promise.."
"I'll wait."
He nods, his eyes locked on Katsuki's face.
"Yeah, yeah, I know you will.. You'll be patient with me.. and I can't wait till it grows back, so you can run your fingers through it, and I can finally feel your touch in every strand.."
He feels Katsuki wash out the rest of the shampoo from his hair, the water running over his head, rinsing away the suds and leaving his hair clean and wet. He can feel the boy's hands back on his head, gently putting the conditioner in. Katsuki speaks again, his tone soft.
"'M sorry you watched me throw up, 'zuku…"
He looks at him, his heart swelling with empathy and understanding.
"No, no, don't be sorry... don't be sorry at all.. It's okay, I don't mind.. I don't mind taking care of you, I don't mind seeing you when you're hurting, I don't mind being there for you, no matter what.. I love you, remember?.. no matter what, I'm always here for you.."
Katsuki cuts him off, slowly pressing their lips together. The last time they kissed was in the hospital, when they were at their worst mentally, a few days after the war ended. It was impulsive, and for comfort. They both agreed it would be a one time thing.
He feels Kacchan's lips press gently and slowly against his own, and for a moment, everything else melts away. Despite their previous agreement that it would only happen once, in their worst moments, he can't help but melt into the kiss, feeling a wave of tenderness and love wash over him.
He wraps his arms around the boy's waist, pulling him closer under the hot shower stream, their chests pressed together as they continue the kiss. He can feel the boy's heart beating in time with his own, and he savours the taste of his lips, the sweetness and the heat of their mouths together.
Izuku slides his tongue into Katsuki's mouth, deepening the kiss, the water running down their bodies only serving to heighten the intensity of the moment. He can feel the boy's hands on his shoulders, holding him gently, holding him close as they explore each other's mouths, slow and tender.
It's different this time compared to the hospital. No fear, no tears, no fresh trauma prominent in their minds, plaguing their thoughts. Just a gentle and loving connection between them. Their bodies pressed together, their lips interlocked, the pace slow and tender. The only sound is that of their breath, the water rushing over them, and the occasional soft moan, muffled against each other's mouths.
He pulls away from the kiss, resting his forehead against the boy's, their breaths mingling together as they try to catch their breath.
"I love you.. I love you so much.. I'll always love you.. always.."
A tear drips down Katsuki's face, almost unnoticed by the water.
"Izuku…"
He suddenly notices the tear dripping down the boy's face, and he instantly reaches up to wipe it away, his touch gentle and tender.
"Hey, hey, it's okay.. it's okay, don't cry.. don't cry.. I'm here, I'm right here...what is it?.. what's wrong?.. What do you need, huh?.. talk to me, tell me what you need.."
Katsuki's voice comes out weak and breathless, pleading.
"I need… You."
Izuku nods, his heart swelling with emotion, his voice filled with tenderness.
"Yeah.. yeah, you have me.. you have me, I'm here.. I'm right here, with you.. I'm not going anywhere, alright?.. I'm here, I'm right here, and I always will be.."
He speaks again, slightly strained, a hint of frustration laced in his words.
"No, I… Need you."
Izuku tilts his head, looking at the boy, confusion and curiosity visible in his eyes.
"Need.. me?.. What do you mean? Do you.. need me to do something?.. What do you need from me?.. tell me, please, Kacchan.."
Exasperation and frustration show through Katsuki's words, as if there's something stopping him, a physical barrier wedged in his oesophagus filtering his words to cause Izuku not to understand.
"I just.. When you say you love me.. What does that.. What are you thinking.."
He pauses for a moment, letting Kacchan's words sink in. He knows this is important, and he wants to be honest and truthful with his answer.
"What.. what am I thinking?.. when I say I love you?.. well.. I'm thinking.. that I can't imagine my life without you.. that you're the person who understands me better than anyone else.. the person who makes me feel safe, comfortable, and happy.. I'm thinking that whenever I'm with you, I feel complete.. like nothing else matters except for us, right here together.."
More tears slip down his cheeks silently, and there's a change in his voice, it's shaky.
"Izuku… I need you…"
He hears the change in the boy's voice, hears the shakiness, the pleading tone, and his eyes widen in concern.
"Hey.. hey, what's wrong?.. Why are you crying?.. you sound like.. you sound like you're in pain or something.. tell me.. please, tell me what you need.."
He’s cut off by Katsuki resting his forehead against his, and all that can be heard is the running water of the shower and their breaths. Katsui’s tears drip onto Izuku's cheeks.
He feels his forehead rest against his own, his tears on his cheeks, and he reaches up to cup Katsuki's face in his hands.
"Hey.. talk to me, please.. tell me what you need, what's wrong?.. I.. I hate seeing you cry.. it hurts me to see you like this, please... talk to me.."
"I love you."
Izuku feels a flutter in his chest as his hears the boy's words, the words that he's heard so many times before. But this time, it feels different. The way they're spoken, the tone, the emotion behind them.. it feels less platonic, it feels more intense, more intimate.
"I.. I know, I know you do.. but.. is that all?.. is that all you're trying to say?.. that you love me?.. you're making me worried, you sound.. you sound so upset.."
Katsuki shuts his eyes, shaking his head.
"You don't understand, Izuku…"
He looks at him, confusion and concern etched on his face
"I.. I don't understand?.. What don't I understand?.. please.. please just tell me.. what's going on?.. talk to me.. I can't help you if I don't understand.."
His tone becomes desperate, tears falling quicker as he stares into Izuku's eyes.
"I love you, Izuku.. I love.. You..."
He feels the boy's desperation, hears the way his voice hitches and wavers. He puts his hands on his forearms, an attempt to calm him down matching the level of desperation woven into Katsuki's voice.
"Hey.. hey, calm down.. it's okay.. I'm here, I'm listening.. I'm listening to you, I'm right here.. I know you love me.. I know you do.. you don't have to keep saying it, I know that.. I love you too.. so don't cry, okay?.. please, don't cry.."
Katsuki's voice is fragmented, his sentence stunted with broken sobs. He wipes his tears with shaky hands as he speaks.
"No, you don't get it, you don't…"
Izuku watches him wipe away his tears, his heart aching at the sight. The ache is desperate, he succumbs to it, it fills his body.
"No.. no, I don't get it, I don't get it.. you're right, I don't understand.. so.. so explain it to me.. please, Explain it.. explain it to me, tell me what you mean.. just.. just talk to me, please...."
Katsuki's sobs continue to break up and stunt his words as he forces them out, his hands muffling them as he swipes away his tears, movements erratic.
"Without you I'm.. Nothing. After our kiss in the hospital I felt like I could breathe. For the first time, not just before the war but.. In my entire life.. I breathed.. It's always been you, Izuku..."
Izuku feels a wave of emotion wash over him as the boy speaks, his words tugging at his heart.
"Without.. without me you're nothing?.. you.. you felt like you could breathe… after we kissed.. for the first time in your life?.. it's always been me?.. you.. you.. you're saying things I never knew.. I never knew you felt that way.., Kacchan.."
Katsuki's hands grip Izuku's wrists, his tears hitting the shower floor along with the water from the stream. His eyes are wide, and his voice breaks, he pleads between gasps and sobs,
"Don't leave me, Izuku.. I can.. Let it go… I can… ignore it…"
His heart clenches at his love’s words, at his tears, at the sobs and gasps that escape his lips.
"Hey.. hey, hey, hey, no, don't say that.. don't even think that.. I'm not going anywhere, okay?.. I'm not going anywhere, I'm not leaving you.. I would never leave you.. I could never leave you behind, okay?.. just.. just calm down, please.. please don't cry.."
Izuku feels the boy's arms wrap around him, tight and fast, as if hes the only think keeping him alive. He immediately reciprocates the embrace, pulling the boy close against his chest, holding him tightly.
"Hey.. hey, it's okay, it's okay, I'm here.. I'm right here with you, alright?.. don't cry, please... please don't cry.. I'm not leaving you, I promise.. I promise, I'll never leave you, okay?.. I'll always be here for you.. always.."
He lets out a choked sob, it sounds painful. An anguished whisper falls from his lips, next to Izuku's ear.
"What do you… what are you thinking…"
He feels Kacchan's whispered words, feels the need and panic in his voice, and he tightens his arms around him, his heart breaking at the sound of his sobs.
"Hey.. hey, hey, I need you to calm down, alright?.. I need you to breathe for me, deep breaths.. you're okay, I'm here, I'm right here.. just.. just breathe.. okay?.. I'll tell you what I'm thinking.. okay?.. just, please, breathe.."
Katsuki forces himself to breathe, to calm down. He focuses on Izuku's hold, using it to anchor him so he can hear what he’s thinking as soon as possible.
Izuku feels his body relax as he forces himself to calm down, and he continues to hold him tight, letting the shower wash over them.
"That's it.. that's it.. just breathe.. in and out, nice and slow, alright?.. there we go.. you're doing so good, just keep breathing.. deep breaths.."
Katsuki rests against him, his hold tight. His breathing is deep and heavy, each drag sounding heady and pained.
"What do you… think…"
He listens to his words, trying to think clearly despite his own emotions being all over the place.
"What do I.. think?.. I don't.. I don't know.. I'm thinking.. that I.. I want to understand what you're trying to tell me.. I want to understand what you're feeling.. I want to know.. what's going on in your head, what's going on with you.. that's what I'm thinking.."
Katsuki breathes out, whiny and spent.
"I love you."
Izuku feels a wave of emotion wash over him as the boy repeats the words he's heard so many times, but this time, they feel different.. this time, they feel like more than just a declaration of friendship.
"I know.. I know you do.. you.. you've told me you love me so many times, and I always say it back.. but.. right now, it feels like.. it feels like you mean it in a different way.. right now, it feels different, it feels deeper.."
He pulls back to look into his eyes,tears slipping down his cheeks. For a split second, the thought, "chubby cheeks" flashes through Izuku's mind, like it did in the doorway.
"It is.. It always has been, Izuku... But when I saw you, lying there.. I knew.. Without you I'd just stop. I'd die.."
He feels his heart clench at the boy's words, the weight of the confession sinking in.
"When you saw me.. lying there, with my arms gone… during the war.. when I was injured and in the hospital.. is that when you knew?.. is.. is that when you knew you loved me?.. not just as a friend, but.. but more than that?.. when you saw me, lying there, broken and hurt.. is that when you realised you'd die without me?.. is that what you mean?.."
Katsuki grips his hands, moving his burning touch down from where it was on his wrists.
"In the hospital, I said.. I always thought we'd be chasing after each other.. For the rest of our lives. But.. I am. And I always will be chasing after you, even after you lose.. The embers.."
He listens to the boy's words, trying to comprehend the depth of his feelings, the intensity of his emotions.
"Chasing after me, even after I lose.. one for all. in my darkest moments, you'll be there, chasing after me.. even after I've lost everything..., you'll be there, standing by my side, supporting me..?"
Katsuki nods fervently. Izuku is starting to understand.
"Because i need you.. And i need… us."
Izuku feels a lump form in his throat as the boy's words sink in, the weight of his emotions becoming overwhelming, hot tears threatening to spill.
"You.. you need me?.. you need us?.. what do you mean by "us"?..."
He's taken by surprise as Kacchan kisses him again, their lips meeting under the rushing water, their faces damp, their bodies pressed together, their tongues tasting the salt from Katsuki's tears.
"Mm.."
He responds to the kiss with a soft moan, his arms around the boy's waist, pulling him closer, his heart racing in his chest.
"I mean that, I need that…"
Izuku pulls away from the kiss, his eyes searching his face, trying to understand what he means.
"That?.. you mean.. you need.. this?.. you need us.. being like this?.. being.. intimate?.. is that what you need?.. "
Katsuki huffs, overwhelmed, exasperated..
"Not just intimate.. I need all of you. I need you with me. I need you.. I can't imagine a future.. Without you in it.."
Izuku's heart practically hammers in his chest as he hears his words, realising the depth of his emotions, the intensity of his feelings.
"You... you can't imagine a future without me in it?.. you.. you need me with you.. you need all of me, everything I am?.. you.. you want a future... a future with me in it?.."
He tightens his arms around his waist. They look into each other’s eyes, his voice comes out soft.
"I need you with me.. You're.. My Izuku.."
Izuku feels a rush of emotions as Katsuki says those words, his heart melting, love and tenderness flooding through him.
"I.. I'm your Izuku?.. I'm yours?.. no one else's?..."
Katsuki presses their foreheads together again, the only gap between them being their mouths, open and panting..
"No…"
He feels the boy press his forehead to his again, their faces close together, their breaths mingling in the steam-filled air, the sound of the water rushing around them creating a cocoon separating them from the world outside.
"No.. no one else's?.. you.. you mean it?.. I'm yours, and you're mine?.. we belong… together.."
A smile ghosts over Katsuki's features, small. It's the only thing Izuku can see.
"You're mine.. And I'm yours."
Izuku feels a wave of love and possessiveness wash over him at the boy's words, the feeling of ownership and belonging almost overwhelming.
"I'm yours.. I'm yours, and you're mine.. we belong to each other, we're tied together.. always.. forever.."
Katsuki pulls him closer, his arms wrapped around him, their bodies pressed flush together now. The water from the shower creates a wall around them, the sound muffled and distant. Izuku holds his body close to his, the water cascading over them, their skin slick and warm as they cling to each other under the spray.
Katsuki's soft whisper breaks the silence.
"Do you understand…"
Izuku listens to his love’s words, his heart in his throat, his mind struggling to process all the emotions and sensations ripping through him.
"I... I understand, yes.. but.. I still want to hear you say it, hear you say what you're feeling.. I want to hear the words from your lips, tell me.. please.. tell me that you love me, that you need me.. that you're mine, and I'm yours... tell me all of it.. please..."
Katsuki pulls back so he can look at him, and between fresh tears, manages the words,
"I love you, Izuku.. I'm who I am.. Because you're here. And without you, I'd just.. If anything happened to you in that damn war I don't think I would have woken up."
Izuku's heart shatters as he hears his words, the emotion in his voice, the tears mixing with the water from the shower.
"No.. don't say that.. don't say you wouldn't have woken up if something happened to me.. don't even think that.."
He takes a deep breath, his voice shaking.
"I... I can't even imagine a life without you.. I can't imagine a world where you're not here with me.. you're more important to me than anything else.. I love you, too.."
He responds instantly to Katsuki's sudden kiss, their lips meeting once more, the heat and passion between them building as the water continues to rain down on them.
He pulls away from the kiss, his lips moving to Kacchan's neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin there. His hands move over his body, touching and claiming him in all the ways he can.
"Izuku…"
He responds between kisses, his voice low and hoarse.
"Yeah?.. what is it?.. What do you need?.. tell me.. tell me what you want.."
He feels Katsuki's breath against his skin, the sound of his exhaustion and overwhelm washing over him like a wave. He realises maybe he went too fast too quickly, as it took a lot out of Katsuki to string together the words forming his confession.
"Hey.. hey.. it's okay... it's okay.. just breathe for me, alright?.. calm down.. take deep breaths..."
He presses gentle, feather-light kisses against his neck, a contrast to the starved nipping and sucking just seconds previous. His hands rubbing soothing circles on his back. He wraps his arms around his love, holding him tightly, his body providing support and comfort to the clearly overwhelmed Katsuki.
"That's it.. that's it.. just breathe.. deep breaths.. you're okay, you're safe with me.."
"I'm…here…"
He nods, his lips still tracing soft kisses up his neck, stopping at his cheeks.
"Yeah.. yeah, you're here with me.. you're right here, and I'm not leaving you.. I'm not leaving you, I promise.. I'm staying right here with you.."
Katsuki lets out a hopeless whine.
"Hold me tighter, Izuku…"
He tightens his arms around the boy, pulling him even closer, their bodies pressing together completely, not an inch of space between them.
"Is this.. tight enough?.. You want me to hold you tighter?..."
Katsuki hugs back, his forehead touching his. He closes his eyes.
"You're here, your arms are here…"
Izuku smiles, and presses their lips together in a gentle kiss.
"Yeah.. yeah, I'm here.. and my arms are right here, holding you as tight as I can.. I'm not going anywhere, I promise.. I'm here with you, I'm not leaving you.."
He feels the water turning cold as it washes over them, the chill sending a shiver down his spine.
"The water's getting cold.. we should probably get out.."
Katsuki grimaces, and shivers slightly.
"We should…"
Izuku nods, reluctantly releasing him from his embrace, his hands leaving his body as he turns off the water.
"Yeah.. we should.. come on, let's dry off.."
They step out, izuku notices katsuki’s shaky legs as they stand on the cold tile, and he quickly reaches out to support him, wrapping an arm around his waist to help steady him.
"Hey.. be careful, take it slow.. you're a bit unsteady on your legs.."
Katsuki touches Izuku's forearm, gentle with his hold, comforting with his touch.
“I’m okay…”
Izuku keeps his arm around his waist as they start to dry off, a slight hint of concern in his voice.
"You sure?.. you're not feeling dizzy or anything?.. you were shaking just a moment ago.."
He smiles, small and genuine. The soft tone of his voice is the only thing heard in the room,
“I'm alright, I just.. Need to be with you.. Close to you, tonight…”
Izuku nods, understanding the boy's need for closeness and intimacy, and his own heart aches with the same desire.
"I know.. I know, I get it.. I need to be close to you too.. to feel your skin against mine.. to hold you in my arms and know that you're mine.."
He reaches for a towel and begins to dry the boy off, his hands moving gently over the other’s body, touching him in a way that is both tender and possessive. He lets him dry him off with the towel, his body responding to the boy's touch on a primal level, his skin tingles where his love’s hands pass over it.
Once they're both dry, he pulls katsuki closer, his arms wrapping around his waist, their naked bodies pressing together. They breathe together, slow and steady, coming down from the intensity of the events that just unfurled. They rest against each other in their embrace, and for the first time since the war, they've felt like it didn't happen.
As they stand there, wrapped in each other's embrace, a sense of peace washes over Izuku, a sense of belonging unlike anything he's ever experienced before.
"Mm.. Kacchan.."
In response, Katsuki holds tighter onto him, resting his forehead on his neck. He presses a kiss to the base of it.
“Can we go to bed?”
He nods, his fingers tracing delicate patterns along the length of his spine, his heart full with tenderness.
"Yeah.. yeah, let's go to bed.. we're both exhausted.."
He leads the boy out of the bathroom, their limbs brushing against each other as they make their way to his bed, the exhaustion and intimacy of the moment affecting them both more than they'd like to admit.
Izuku gently pulls Katsuki down onto the bed with him, the sheets cool against their skin as they settle against each other, their bodies instinctively finding each other in the dimly lit room, as if they were the only thing keeping each other alive. Katsuki holds him to his chest, pressing gentle kisses to his head.
He feels Kacchan’s lips against his head, the kisses tender and soothing, a wave of comfort and safety washing over him. He buries his face in the boy's chest, their naked bodies pressed together, his body moulding against his like they were made for each other. He feels a sense of contentment consuming his senses as he listens to the steady thump of his heart against his ear, the sound soothing and rhythmical, grounding him in the moment.
“Mm… I love you… so much..”
“I love you too, Izuku.”
A contented sigh escapes him, and he snuggles closer to him, his arms wrapping around him tightly, not wanting to let go.
"I don't ever want to leave this bed.. I don't ever want to let you go.. I want to stay like this.. just the two of us.. Forever.."
Katsuki’s nose rests on his collarbone, unable to fully process the words. He’d imagined them spoken to him countless times, soothing him back to sleep after agonising, tear filled nights.
Shh.. I'm not going anywhere.. Just sleep, 'Zuku..
A lazy smile spreads across Izuku’s face at the nickname, and he nods, his eyelids heavy with exhaustion and contentment.
"Alright.. alright, I'll sleep.. but you have to promise me.. you have to promise me you won't go anywhere, that you'll stay with me.. promise me that you'll be here when I wake up.."
He mumbles the three words against his collarbone like he doesn't know how to say anything else.
“I'll be right here.. I love you..”
He feels a warm, fuzzy feeling spread through him as Kacchan repeats the words, the sentiment so simple and earnest it almost brings tears to his eyes.
"I know.. I know you do.. and I love you too.. so much.. so much, that it feels like my heart is going to burst.. I love you.. I love you more than anything.. more than anyone.. you're everything to me.. don't ever forget that.."
“I can't forget.. When we get old, and I'm crippled and don't even remember my own name.. I'll remember I love you.”
Izuku feels Katsuki's chest vibrate against his lips as he speaks. The thought of growing old together fills him with a sense of happiness and contentment, and he can't help but smile hopelessly at the other’s words.
"Yeah?.. you'll remember that you love me?.. even when you're old and grey and riddled with wrinkles, and I'm balding and toothless and hobbling around with a cane, you'll remember that you love me?.."
Katsuki laughs against Izuku's shoulder, spent. He feels Izuku’s smile against his chest, his lips over his scar.
Izuku feels him laugh, the sound vibrating against his face, and he can't help but mirror his amusement, his smile widening.
"You'd better remember, you know.. I'll hold you to that.. if you forget, I'll be forced to remind you every day.. every single day.."
“I’ll remember, Izuku.”
He smiles again, his heart swelling with affection as he feels the boy say the words, the truth and conviction behind his voice so strong he knows he really will remember. He knows he'll never forget.
"Good.. you'd better..."
He gets the words out slowly. For the first time, resting against Katsuki's scar, the thought of him being late doesn't even cross his mind. He tightens his arms around his waist, and can breathe.
He holds him close, his mind starting to haze as fatigue starts to take over, the warmth and safety of the boy's embrace enveloping him, his eyelids feeling heavier with each passing second.
"Mmm... love you... so much..."
Katsuki lets himself relax into the feeling. Izuku's arms are here, around him. There will be no nightmares tonight.
“Mmm.. Love you too, izuku..”
Izuku’s eyelids flutter shut, the sound of the boy's sleepy voice pulling him into unconsciousness, a soft smile still on his lips. he manages to murmur,
"Mm.. love you more..."
His words slur with exhaustion, and then sleep overtakes him, a blissful sleep born from debility, love, and safety.
The night passes quietly, the two of them lying intertwined in each other's arms. Hours pass, the room growing darker as the street lights outside cast shadows on the walls. When the first rays of dawn begin to bleed in through the window, slowly filling the room with a soft, warm light, both boys wake up, neither of them alerting the other.