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Jayce needs a break.
Viktor watches as the man’s hand- normally so steady and dexterous- trembles, shaking with either hunger or exhaustion as he hunches over their grant workup. His hair falls out of its usual coif, his face is ashen, and the cologne he normally uses is just faintly overpowered by the sour smell of anxious, slept-in sweat.
This won’t do , Viktor thinks, slowly making his way over to where his partner sits. It is… a little frustrating, Viktor admits, to see how far Jayce will push himself. Viktor can sympathize- he too knows how it feels when the work gets under his skin, the hum sustaining him in a seemingly more substantial manner than mere blood or bone ever could. And sometimes Viktor gives into that urge- follows its sweet siren song down, down, down until he gasps awake from its trance feeling like the unwashed grime on the underside of a wastebasket. And with the recovery afterwards…
There’s a reason he tends not to push himself.
Jayce, however, does not seem to abide by these rules. In the two years that Viktor has known him- and especially in the past year since they started being partners outside of work- he has noticed that Jayce has two modes. The rarer sort is where he’s completely unfocused, where raging bulls will not turn his head towards anything, productive or otherwise, and he fidgets and stares at papers until his eyes cross. It used to needle Viktor, how Jayce seemed to waste time those days, until one day Jayce had told him what it was like- the feeling of being trapped in his body, fingers wanting to work, create, play- but mind rejecting all ideas like they were fire on a hot stove.
“It’s not fun,” Jayce had said, completely oblivious to Viktor’s inner turmoil as he’d just described nothing short of a living nightmare. “I’m just glad it doesn’t happen often.”
“Agreed,” Viktor had murmured, and had silently vowed to be kinder to Jayce on those days.
The second type of mode is the complete opposite of the first, and it’s one that Jayce falls into quite regularly- the one where he becomes utterly absorbed in whatever he’s doing, like a diver submerging himself into the depths of the Pilt. It’s in this mode that Viktor can see how this incredible, brilliant man came up with the idea of Hextech in the first place. It is also, unfortunately, the mode that leaves Jayce shaking with hunger and exhaustion once the spell breaks, that leaves him pale and irritable, staggering like a ghoul into the decontamination shower as his legs tremble with the effort of not collapsing out from underneath him. And while it’s true that Jayce gets good work done during those times, Viktor would rather he get no work done if it meant that Jayce was healthy.
(He tries not to examine what that says about him.)
Once again, nothing short of a calamity will pull Jayce out of a mood like this. Viktor’s tried, of course he’s tried, but Jayce had been so painfully irritable for the rest of the day that the two of them had decided it was not worth it. Instead, when Jayce gets like this, Viktor keeps an eye on him and the clock both, and, at appropriate points, plies him with food and water. He hasn’t quite figured out a way to pull Jayce into the bathroom for toilet breaks, but he figures that until he does, Jayce can just rely on his bladder. And if on those days Viktor pushes more cranberry juice to him than he normally does… well. That’s no one’s business but his, thank you very much.
Today, however, Viktor hadn’t been in the lab at all- despite Jayce claiming him as a partner from the very first night they’d shared a blackboard together, he’d still had duties to perform as Heimerdinger’s assistant. And while Viktor had tried to hand them off as speedily as he could, bureaucracy runs slow, especially when the person in charge is an immortal who counts years like pennies instead of precious gold.
Which means Jayce has been left to his own devices, and well…
Viktor’s heart squeezes as he watches Jayce drop his pen yet again because his fingers shake too much to hold onto it.
“Am I interrupting?”
Jayce jumps, and, despite everything, the tired scowl on his face melts easily into a smile. “Viktor!” he says, putting the pen down as he turns towards the door. “You’re back! How’d it go?”
“Mm, as expected.” Viktor walks up to him, leaning into Jayce’s arm as he’s embraced in a one sided hug. “It didn’t take long to officially pass off the last of my duties. Most of the time was actually taken up by Heimerdinger- for some reason, he wanted to eh- keep talking to me?”
“Aw, he’s going to miss you,” Jayce says, chuckling as he rests his head against Viktor’s stomach. Viktor shakes his head and takes the invite to pet his hair- the sigh he receives upon doing so brings a smile to his face. “I don’t blame him, I’d miss you too.”
“He will still see me,” Viktor argues, smoothing back the errant strands of hair falling into Jayce’s face. “We still have to present our research to him, you know that.”
“Yeah, but he won’t be seeing you around campus anymore.” Jayce looks up, a mischievous glint in his tired eyes. “Now that you don’t have any more duties from him, you’ll be holing yourself up in the lab 24/7- who knows if you’ll ever come out?”
Viktor bites back a laugh. “I resent that notion,” he says, gently flicking Jayce’s forehead before soothing it softly when Jayce shoots him a hurt glare. “Especially when it’s said by you- how long have you been in the lab today, hm?”
“Uhhhh…”
Jayce’s eyes dart around, and he flushes as he guiltily ducks his head. Viktor can’t help but soften further- gods, but this lovely man may end up being the death of him.
He wouldn’t mind that.
“No… comment?”
“Alright,” Viktor says easily, settling his hand over Jayce’s nape. “When was the last time you slept, hm?”
Jayce looks away again. “I- well, y’know…”
Viktor tips his chin up with two fingers. “When was the last time you ate?”
Jayce closes his eyes. “Viktor,” he whispers, but the defeated exhaustion in his voice is so loud he might as well have screamed it.
There’s a moment of silence as Viktor gently tugs Jayce closer, allowing him to hide his face in Viktor’s stomach. Viktor, never one to waste time, uses said moment to think on exactly what needs to be done next. And once his mind is made up, he speaks.
“You are done for the night.”
Jayce’s fingers tense, flexing against Viktor’s hips. “I- I still need to-”
“Jayce.”
Jayce looks up, slowly, as if he expects to be scolded. Viktor smiles as gently as he can- gods, he hopes he looks kind. “You are done for the night,” he repeats, tangling his fingers into Jayce’s hair once more. He watches as his partner’s eyes flutter with the movement. “Here is what is going to happen- I will take you home. You will shower, and then you and I will eat. Once that is done, you will go to bed. Does that sound acceptable?”
Jayce bites his lip. “Can I ask a question?”
You already have, Viktor thinks teasingly, but pushes the thought away for now- as fragile as Jayce is now, he will not respond well to a gentle tease. “Go ahead.”
“Come to bed with me?”
Ah. “Of course,” Viktor says, scratching the skin behind Jayce’s ear with a soft nail. “Anything else?”
“No- wait! Actually, yes.” Jayce tilts his head up at Viktor- as always, it reminds him of a puppy. “Do you want me to talk for the rest of the night?”
Viktor blinks. Ah, he supposes he should not be surprised by that question- from the tone Viktor had set, it does sound like some of the games they like to play in and out of bed together. It is not exactly what Viktor was going for, but if it would help Jayce away from the focused state he’d been drowning in…
“It is up to you, zlatíčko ,” Viktor says, brushing a thumb over Jayce’s cheek. “Whatever makes you most comfortable.”
Jayce hums at that, closing his eyes and nuzzling into Viktor’s hand. Puppy, Viktor thinks fondly as Jayce presses a kiss into the center of Viktor’s palm. “I… hm. I don’t know. Can we keep it up in the air?”
“Of course.” Viktor scratches under his jaw and is rewarded with another one of those pleased hums. “You’re allowed to talk for now- with some conditions.”
Jayce cracks open an eye. “Oh?”
“Nothing we haven’t done before,” Viktor assures, petting his cheek. “I would like for you to obey me tonight, but other than that, nothing else.”
“Oh.” Jayce scrunches his nose. “That’s easy.”
Viktor has to bite back a laugh. “You are amenable, then?”
“Mhm.”
“Good.” Viktor pats Jayce’s cheek and drops a brief kiss on his forehead before pulling away. “Now, get up. It is time we go home.”
The walk back to Viktor’s place is relatively quiet. They discuss their day apart in hushed tones, as if spellbound by the evening. At this time, the activity on campus has died down as it always does, with the exodus of students to the north in search of bars and clubs in which they will ah- what is the phrase? ‘Dance the night away?’
“Yeah,” Jayce says, chuckling fondly as Viktor scrunches his nose. “You don’t look so enthused by it.”
“I suppose I just don’t see the appeal,” Viktor says, sniffing as Jayce laughs again. “I mean, really- if you must do something all night long, why not spend that time on your research? Or learn ahead on classwork so that you have more time for your own personal projects, like you did?”
Jayce flushes and ducks his head- the way he bites his lip, however, tells Viktor he's secretly pleased. “I somehow doubt that most people are workaholics like us, Vik.”
“Ridiculous,” Viktor says, and revels in the sound of Jayce’s quiet laughter again.
They walk in and shuck off their shoes- Viktor insists, everytime, and Jayce, as always, is eager to please. Jayce takes their coats and hangs them in the broom closet as Viktor walks to the kitchen to pull out ingredients.
“There should be a change of clothes for you in the drawer,” he says, putting his cane to the side before checking on the vegetables- is that a spot? He tests it with his finger. No, just a trick of the light. “And the soaps should be on the bathroom counter.”
A chuckle rumbles throughout the apartment. “I know, V,” Jayce says, fondness practically dripping from his voice. “I think I’ve been here enough times to know how this works.”
“If that is the case, then what are you waiting for, hm?” Viktor looks at him, raising an eyebrow. Predictably, Jayce flushes- gods above, he doesn’t know what he did in a past life to be blessed with such a wonderfully expressive man, but he hopes to cherish him for as long as he can. “If you haven’t noticed, the shower is not in the kitchen.”
Jayce bites his lip, shifting from side to side. “I- you sure you don’t want any help with dinner? You’ve had such a long day…”
“As have you.” Viktor pulls out a big pot, closing the cupboard with his hip. He shoots Jayce a stern look. “And I believe I asked you to obey me tonight, zlatíčko .”
Jayce ducks his head. “I- yeah. Sorry.”
“It is alright.” Viktor puts the pot on the counter before reaching over to pat Jayce’s hand. “I do not expect you to be perfect at all times. I do expect you to listen to me, however. And right now, I would like you to listen to me when I tell you that you need to go take a shower.”
Jayce laughs then, bright like a spark. “Do I smell that much?”
Viktor looks at him with the most somber face he can manage. “Very much so.” He cannot resist a smile, however, when Jayce laughs again. “Now shoo.”
“Alright, alright, I’m off.”
Viktor watches him stride down the hall and shakes his head, still smiling. Then he turns to the big pot once more.
Back to work.
The dinner he wishes to prepare tonight is not a culinary miracle, nor is it a cultural dish from either side of their partnership. Jayce needs something hearty to be full, but not too rich or else it will upset his stomach. And, from what Ximena has told Viktor about reflux running in the Talis family, it would probably be better for it to not be spicy- much as his partner loves spices, Viktor would rather he not get heartburn in the middle of the night. It is not exactly… pleasant.
He puts a light broth on the stove to boil and sets to work cutting the vegetables. The sound of the knife meeting the cutting board is soothing, as is the sound of the shower being turned on from down the hall. Viktor strains to hear if Jayce is humming… but no, he is not. Hm- not a good sign. His partner is more tired than he is letting on.
He tosses the vegetables and herbs into the now-simmering pot and goes to pull out the chicken, smiling wryly as he takes in the colorful packaging. Pre-cooked chicken used to be a luxury by his standards, but it’s now become a staple of his everyday life by necessity. He doesn’t have much time nowadays to cook like his děda used to after he couldn’t work in the mines anymore- nor does he have the time to run to one of the food stalls like he used to as a student or as a ragtag child back in the undercity. And so, luxuries turn to necessities.
He knows, in a distant manner, that his parents would have been happy that Viktor managed to get to this point- that though he remembered what hunger was like, he did not have to choose it, and could, instead, revel in convenient but healthy meals daily. It still does not ease the dissonance in Viktor’s heart, the voice in Viktor’s head that whispers he is too far gone from the child of the undercity he once was.
“Viktor?”
Viktor blinks, shakes his head. “Yes, Jayce?”
“Uh, I forgot to bring in a towel.” Jayce’s voice carries down the hall, the embarrassment palpable. “Would you mind tossing me one?”
Viktor clicks his tongue. “Just use mine,” he calls back, smirking as Jayce splutters. “And hurry up- dinner is almost ready.”
He leaves Jayce to his embarrassed clucking and stares at the chicken again. The package crinkles under his hand as he takes it out, puts it into a bowl. It’s perfectly cooked. It’s miles away from the food he used to eat.
He chucks it into the pot.
Jayce walks out just as the soup is finished, toweling his damp hair with his t-shirt.
“Smells good,” he murmurs, leaning over Viktor’s shoulder.
Viktor hums, shutting off the stove. “No shirt?”
Jayce shakes his head. “Too hot.”
“Pfft.” Viktor turns around to meet Jayce’s sleepy, half-lidded gaze. He cups his cheek. “Only you, Jayce.”
“Mm.” Jayce nuzzles into his hand, smiling. “I used some of your moisturizer. Hope you don’t mind.”
“Of course not.” Viktor trails his other hand down Jayce’s chest, brushing over the edge of his surgery scars, before settling at his waist. “I only have it for you.”
Jayce closes his eyes. “You treat me so well.”
“It is my honor to.”
Jayce’s eyebrows furrow. He doesn’t say anything, he’s too well-behaved for that, but Viktor knows he wants to refute him. He knows now, the crevasses of Jayce’s mind, the shape of his anxieties- the way his brain twists and turns knives into his own gut, makes him hemorrhage from the inside out.
He knows it- not only because Jayce has told him about it in halting, stuttering sentences- but because Viktor himself is the same.
“Soup’s getting cold,” Jayce says finally.
“Mm.” Viktor leans up, brushes a kiss against Jayce’s cheek. “Help me set the table.”
“Alright.”
They work in silence- Jayce is clearly slowing down for the night, and Viktor is just matching his energy. Between the two of them, the table is set in no time, and they quietly sit down to eat.
“Smells good, V,” Jayce says, spooning a little of the soup into his mouth. “Mm, tastes good too.”
Viktor has to agree.
Slowly, but surely, dinner passes by them. Typically, they’re talkative- tossing out theorems and jokes between every last bite- but the past couple of days have taken more than they could give, until all that is left now is the shared space between their breaths as they exist together in peace.
“Ready for bed?” Viktor asks once they’ve finally sipped the last of their soup. Jayce nods, the motion jerky and disjointed- ah, his poor, exhausted man, “Alright- go get the blankets while I clean up here.”
Jayce licks his lips, his eyes flickering to the sink even as his hands tremble with exhaustion.
“Jayce.”
Jayce’s eyes snap to his. The shadows lining his skin make him look so gray, so faded with the need to lie down and sleep. Ah, will his heart ever stop squeezing for this man?
Viktor coughs lightly to dislodge the bump of emotion in his throat. “Go get the blankets,” he says, trying to make his voice sound as soft as possible. He doesn’t know if it works, but at the very least it is enough to get Jayce to give him a silent, tired nod.
“You’ll be there soon?”
There’s a hand on his waist- looks like Jayce had moved without even thinking about it. Viktor has to bite back a smile. “Of course, zlatíčko ,” he murmurs, bringing up a hand to Jayce’s arm. He rubs it softly and delights in the way he feels the minute tension in Jayce’s arm melt. “I will be there as soon as I am done.”
“Ok.”
It doesn’t take long to do the dishes- the two sets of bowls and spoons are quickly washed and set to dry. Jayce, Viktor knows, will put them away in the morning when he wakes up before Viktor. For his part, Viktor picks up an extra towel from the hallway closet before knocking on the door at the end of the hall.
“You know you don’t have to do that, right?” Jayce says when he opens the door. He steps aside to let Viktor in. “I mean- it’s literally your room, Viktor. In your own apartment.”
Viktor hums, quickly picking up a set of sleep clothes. He sets out his other binder for tomorrow in the process. “And yet the last time I did not knock before I entered a room with you in it, you were eh- how do they say it here? ‘Naked as the day you were born?’”
“That-! That was one time! And I’d told you I was going to be changing!”
He had, of course, but Viktor had just not remembered until he’d turned the knob to enter. He elects not to tell Jayce this. “Mhm, of course you did.”
“I did!” Jayce insists, following Viktor to the bathroom. “I told you like, three times? And you’d nodded at least once!”
“Did I now?” Viktor puts down his set of clothes. “Does not sound like me.”
“Wh- bu- Viktor.”
“Jayce.” He meets Jayce’s indignant face in the mirror and tries not to laugh. Instead, he just raises an eyebrow. “Is this your revenge, then? I walk in on you changing once, so you follow me to the bathroom to watch me change?”
“Wh-” Jayce’s eyes go wide, and his face bursts into flame. “Oh my god, no! I’m so sorry, Viktor, oh my god, I would never- why are you laughing??”
“Oh god,” Viktor chortles, laughter spilling out of him at the look on Jayce’s face. “Oh, no, Jayce, don’t pout, I’m sorry-”
“I’m not pouting,” Jayce says, pouting. “I don’t pout.”
Liar, Viktor thinks fondly, biting back the urge to pinch Jayce’s puffed up cheeks and coo. “So you don’t want to see me naked?”
Jayce’s face reddens further, but instead of spluttering again, he just smiles and cocks his hip. “Now, I didn’t exactly say that…”
Viktor snorts and looks away, his own face warm now. “Go, Jayce.”
Jayce’s delighted cackles echo down the hallway.
Although Viktor tries his best to take the world’s quickest shower, it seems it still took long enough for Jayce to fall asleep, spread-eagle and slack-jawed on the bedsheets.
Cute, Viktor can’t help but think when he sees the evidence of Jayce drooling out over his pillow. He itches with the urge to poke at his cheeks, brush a finger down the strong line of his nose- both are things that will unfortunately wake Jayce up, however, so he clenches his fist tight instead.
Of course, it turns out his caution was for naught- he bumps into the bed and can’t hold back the swear that slips out.
“Mmgh- Viktor?”
Shit. “Go back to bed, Jayce.”
“Mm’in bed already.” There’s a sharp inhale, and then Jayce is sitting up, yawning loud enough to wake the dead. “Shit, are you ok?”
“Tsk, it is nothing,” Viktor says. “Just eh- stubbed my toe.”
“Awww, no.” Jayce slumps over- even in the dim light, Viktor can see how his eyes go puppy-wide, how his lip pushes forward in a pout. “Poor V- come to bed, I’ll kiss it better.”
“Jayce,” Viktor splutters- he’s torn between hissing with indignation and laughing. His mind is made up for him when Jayce just smiles, sweet and teasing. “Gods above, you can’t just say things like that!”
“Why not?” Jayce asks, tilting his head. His smile turns a bit sharper. “It’s not like you haven’t said worse- like the one time when you-”
“No.” Viktor claps a hand over Jayce’s mouth- Janna preserve him, he does not want to see how red his face looks right now. Given the way Jayce giggles under his hand, he can only assume it’s between shades of sunburn. “I never said anything. I never say anything, in fact.”
“Mph-mgh-mh!”
“No,” Viktor says, pushing Jayce back into the pillow, smiling when Jayce goes down with an indignant huff. “Back to bed with you.”
Jayce tugs the hand off his face to reveal a scowl. “You’re such a sore loser, V.”
“Am I?” Viktor says, raising an eyebrow. He puts his cane at the side of the bed and shuffles under the covers that Jayce is so graciously holding up for him. Sap. “Perhaps you are just a poor winner.”
“Am not!”
“Are too.”
“Am not!”
“Are-” Viktor sighs, laughing into Jayce’s collarbones. It takes a second, but Viktor hears chuckles, tiny little puffs of air that disturb his hair. “Look at us, squabbling like children in the dead of night.”
“If Piltover could see us now…”
“Mm.”
Quiet falls over them. Beneath the blankets, they settle into each other, sleep pulling at their limbs as they clumsily tuck heads under chins and palms against slow, steady heartbeats. Viktor is… surrounded, and he is warm, and he is safe.
He’s drifting off when he hears Jayce shift above him. “Hey, Viktor?”
“Mm?”
The arm around his waist squeezes tighter. “Thank you. For uh- for taking care of me, I mean.”
Ah.
Viktor smiles into Jayce’s collarbone. “Always,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to the warm skin under him.
The sound of Jayce’s heartbeat tugs him down into sleep.