Chapter Text
It was four in the fucking morning for Karma, and why did he wake up? For his mother that totally loves him with all her heart. I mean- she woke her child up for a reason, right?
If you desire the answer, well- Madam Akabane wanted to know how Karma felt about staying in Japan as he was alone. Be honest, wouldn't any parent that cared for their child be concerned that their child was living alone, underage, far enough to be a whole continent away from their mother or father? Hah, not her!
Through the phone, some overly ecstatic voice beamed, "Oh Karma~!"
He hasn't had a good night's sleep in a bit. In a much more tired and dry voice, he croaked, "Ma'am, it's four in the morning in Japa-"
"Does my waste of- I mean, baby- not want to see me right now?" When she asked that question, the only question the boy had was why is he alive right now.
"Never been better!" His voice was exasperated.
Of all the things to swear, the redhead swore her smile's hidden distaste could be heard through the phone. "So, can you explain why the fuck your teachers are giving me and your father calls?" Everyone with a braincell knew she could and would fly all the way to Japan to beat her son's ass. "I made it pretty clear what the rules were, no?"
"Yes.. you did," Karma spoke softly. "As long as the school doesn't give trouble, I don't have to go back to 'there'."
"So are you going to answer why your homeroom teacher, Mr. Karasuma, is asking me about mental issues?" All of the child's fear was making the bile inside rise. Fuck it, he wanted to puke. "Hell~o?"
He let out a soft dying laugh and lied, "Mental issues? I thought and still think that I am perfectly fine! Don't you remember? I've stopped fighting after I got out of the main campus. Practically the entire school is full of idiots, so I dropped down to the place with the least distractions!"
Being at the main campus meant Gakushuu would see and interact with him. His mother would disapprove of it, and the Asano name is just a reminder of how little the world needs him. Well, the fact that his two feet even step foot onto his biological father's territory already reminds him enough.
"Can you change the file into calling the phone at the house you're at?" Wow. Never saw the fact she wants absolutely nothing to do with her own child. "Your voice is high enough to act as a girl. Plus you can just act as my husband, they've never heard his voice."
"Okay!" Way more energized than he really is, he questioned, "Is that all? It's not right for a mother to have to endlessly waste time because their child is incompetent. I'll see you-"
Mrs. Akabane cut him off. Who was he kidding? Just as he went on about not wasting time, that was wasting time. Just understand what she's saying, and end the call. It was that fucking simple.
Slightly peeved, he carelessly tossed the phone behind him, which landed on his desk if you can even call it one. Soft breezes of air went past the curtains into his room. That's when he went onto the balcony and laid flat on the hard, cold surface.
"How splendid would it be if I could actually die if all I did was just throw myself off the balcony? Nobody would discover the body. Damn, would they even realize? I can only imagine Chiba looking for me, but when has any of my friendships ever been genuinely sweet like that?" Tears formed at the edge of his eyes.
In the case his phone cracked when he threw it behind him, it wouldn't matter. That desk he has is more like a nightstand next to a bookcase. For your information, the entire room was more minimalistic than a poor family of four.
His bed? Two small mattresses on the ground and a pillow that felt like a rock. His bookcase and desk that can't even fit a computer? Well, the bookcase has about a tenth of it being used, and the nightstand has nothing on it, likely used for homework and nothing more. At least the closet had been filled decently.
Everywhere in the mansion was decorated to scream wealth except for Karma's room. It was easy to understand why, at least for the Akabanes. That room given to him was actually a spare room with the things that got replaced. Books were the only thing he personally bought.
This mansion had so much for appearance, it was the reason he was able to act like a rich kid. Just in case someone asked to sleep over, which nobody did because who the fuck would want to hang out with this wretch, he can pick a day to lie about his parents leaving for a trip because anyday would work. As long as his room isn't touched, everything was okay.
Nagisa and Sugino considered going to the Akabanes once, but Karma acted well enough to change it to the redhead traveling to them. He was prepared to have guests. It simply doesn't mean he wants any.
Besides that, he's realized that his mercury eyes have been going through an anything but intense staring contest. Ceiling versus Karma, what a great reminder of how low his sanity and hours of sleep have gotten. Whereas anybody he loves is definitely sleeping to their heart's content right now.
All that's left for him is to stare at the ceiling for another two or so hours. Forget sleeping, we have this thing called insomnia! Yeah, sanity levels hit the drain hard today.
Maybe he really did need to try and get at least another hour of sleep. When his phone starting to go off from the alarm, Karma turned it off and swayed his way over like a drunk person. A gang did try to make him drink alcohol, but resulted in three unconscious bodies and one traumatized drunk.
Grabbing one of his like- seven- black blazers, he stuffed his phone in his bag and walked to the mountain. Blazers only filled half of his closet because that was the one thing his mother adored on him. They grew on him, but left a deep distasteful scar in his mind.
Like the world clicked in an absolutely great idea, the second Karma stepped on the mountain, his body blanked. With his eyes aimed to the dirt, he initiated another staring contest. Every inch of his body from head to toe felt numb, like the owner wasn't him.
As often as this became since two years ago, today would be the first time that an 'episode' occurred while standing up. "I am so not fucking okay," was the first thing he thought.
The fact that this was about the only chance he'd ever make it on time, his hazy control pushed to go forward. Karma's body felt like it was sort of a rusted lever because of this. Its operator takes the most effort to turn it, but the thing being operated cooperates accordingly.
Slowly but surely, he trudged his way up the mountain. Since it was clear as day that nobody is behind him, the redhead had no reason to pretend that everything was okay. In the case someone is definitely running late and stumbles upon him, just use the 'I was playing video games all night, I'm tired' card.
Chiba was laying his eyes on his friend's desk behind him. Nobody can see his eyes because they're covered by his bangs, but it was obvious what he was looking at. Concern was only destined to fill the not just the boy's heart, everyone's.
Not only has Karma been skipping more than usual for the past week, I remind you, he's also lost interaction with some of his classmates. Scratch that, not a soul has heard from him for three days! Whenever he skips periods or whole days, the next time he is back he'll say that it was him stuck on video game. Some are starting to believe it's deeper than that.
It was until they heard footsteps down the hall. Was Karasuma sensei coming in to speak? Maybe Irina? Definitely not the teacher they actually expect because he can't make regular footsteps.
"Sorry, sorry, I've been gone for like a week, haven't I?" Karma's smirk and carefree attitude left the entire class ninety times more jovial compared to three seconds ago!
Maehara wrapped his arm around his neck and started to form a smile. "You're finally back, Karma! Rio made a betting pool as to why you've left!"
Said blonde giggled, "Yeah, look!" She held the jar of money high and proud. "So, ya gonna tell-" This thing called time and a bell came together and shut down all plans. "Boo hoo," she grumbled disappointedly, "Guess we'll wait for break."
And the second their break time began, half the class surrounded Karma, who was about to engage a conversation with Nagisa. "So~ can you tell us?" Nakamura was grinning ear to ear.
"I can tell you, and I will," he slowly started with a hint of unease, "but what are the bets? As in, what are the guesses? And if there is a none of the above, can I have the money?"
Rio scoffed, "No way, we have every scenario that you'd fit! I bet that you got in a fight, lost, and was too scared to come to school banged up." Off the marks man.
Like he was hallucinating, Chiba had the stupidest expression on the visible parts of his face. "What the- why is that even an option! I just bet he got sick because I didn't want to join the thing in the first place!" Better, but not correct.
There was a sheet. It contained every entry with the guess. All eyes were on Karma, who was reading each and every response. "Damn, do people really think all I do is fight? So how am I supposed to explain the answer is that I blanked and found myself in the attic, tried to sleep in the attic which led to me staring at the dust for like ten hours, cleaning the attic until it the wood was polished, finally tried to look at my phone just to see that half of my messages were from Okuda and Nagisa, who were people that actually cared for me, and I can't remember the rest up until my mother called me?" Don't.
"Can I have at the least some of the pool? None of these are right, but I would say Chiba is the closest." Nearly everyone in the class deflated in disappointment and dissatisfaction, but the one who started the pool reluctantly handed a forth to Karma and the rest to Chiba.
Nagisa heaved in relief, "I'm glad it wasn't extreme like what Nakamura had in mind, though I do think Terasaka and his friends wanted something along the lines of what she said," his voice spoke sad.
"Why are you sad? I was just gone for three days," the redhead defended, "I hope you know that some kids are bedridden for weeks!"
Just as the bluenette was ready to make a counterclaim and rebuttal, the bluenette of a darker shade of hair came waltzing into their talk. "Three days still isn't good, I just don't understand how you are still acing the work! If anyone else in this class missed a day, next assignment is good as a waste of paper!"
Given the slightest bit of motivation, Karma would actually study. Lately, there hasn't been an inkling of it, so staring at the ceiling works. Hell, if his mother or step-father even suggested studying, that leads to a week of no sleep and maybe a single meal in those seven days.
They're his motivation. His will to live. His everything. Their words control the life one values so little. Hearing and following Akabane's command is what Karma is best at in any situation.
That being said, Nagisa was lecturing for too long to be comfortable with. But who is better at deflecting and misdirecting conversations they can't handle mentally other than Karma himself? "Next period is Japanese? No- thank- you~! See ya Nagisa, next test I'll just prove how Korosensei ain't all that!"
Nagisa was definitely about to protest, but the younger one disappeared in lightning speed. He and Karasuma had something to discuss, the number being called regularly. It has to be the phone number of the mansion now because his mother wishes it.
Japanese class was just about to get started when he strolled in. Irina was probably trying to buy some shit be it online or at a mall.
"Karasuma sensei~!" Karma waved before entering. "Can we talk?"
Karasuma was known to give his full attention when the topic isn't just for stupidity and passing time. Shutting down his computer, he rotated the rolling chair to his student, "Yes, Karma?"
At first, he smiled at the thought he had undivided attention, but quickly sat and requested, "Can we change the number you have to call when it is school related? Like the one on my profile?"
"And why would I need to do that?" Improv time! Speak anything but the full truth.
"So, you see," he dragged sarcastically, "my mom doesn't want her work phone being called during her work hours, so she wants you to change it to my father's which is this!" Typing it on his phone, he showed the number in his contact labeled: Dad.
"Do you mind if we confirm this with your mother?" Yes, he did mind, maybe more than he really should have. Still, Karma nodded with an innocent smile.
This call would likely be the last time the school ever called Mrs. Akabane, but he still hated that. How will she react to hearing over the phone the number called will instead be his father? The number he labeled 'Dad' was the home phone, not his actual father's number.
Still, he heard the phone ring, and it made him want to puke. So be it if the redhead ends up being yelled at by his mother. Ringing stopped meaning she picked up the phone. "Hello, this is Nao Akabane," the one on the other side of the phone said in full Italian.
Unfortunately, Karasuma knew not a single bit of Italian. Before he said anything into the speaker, he turned to his student, "Karma, do you understand what your mom is saying?" An irritated nod became his first instinct. "Please ask her to speak in Japanese or English, I can understand those."
"Mom," Karma replied in Italian, "they want your confirmation to change the phone number. If my teacher says anything about father's number, I lied, it's the home-"
"You little shit, just let me talk to him!" Powerless to the raise in her voice, the boy gave the phone back to Karasuma. She heard the exchange through the phone and spoke fluently in Japanese, "I'm sorry sir, I didn't realize the school was calling."
Clearing his throat the man began. "Mrs. Akabane, your son here said you want to change the number we call to his father. Is this correct?"
"My husband has two numbers, can you read out loud which one he presented? I already discussed with my husband to take his calls, though I'm not sure he is available at the moment." At least they won't be testing to see if the redhead's father actually had his number on the page.
Karma was ready to bolt out the door and jump off the cliff of this mountain the second he realized he has messed up somewhere. As his physical education teacher finish finalizing things, it felt like a burden weighed as little as dust. While Karasuma was trying to talk to the boy, it fell on deaf ears.
"...Karma," the man spoke deeply with the concern etched in, "Are you okay?" Not the question he was expecting.
"Hm? Yeah." How many times has he played off this lie? More importantly, how many times will this work? "Sorry, I've spaced out since you started talking with my mom."
Was his homeroom teacher trying to read into him like a book? Something was off about each other, and neither of them liked it. Rather, one was confused and the other uncomfortable.
Offering reassurance, the man told the teenager, "Your mother seems protective of you in a way, but if there is trouble at home, you can tell us."
"Huh? Trouble?" Acting oblivious is somehow to his knowledge, the best way to alleviate feelings of concern or worry. Go act the story everyone wants to hear. A story that doesn't cause concern.
"There is nothing wrong with her not wanting to be first informed of calls, but she did sound angry." Crap, did Nao's yelling get heard by his teacher? "I'm not sure why. You don't have to tell me. Plus, you might not even know."
"Probably a deal that went six feet under," he brushed it off and left.
Somehow, the redhead strolled down the mountain so slowly that it took about three periods to get down. That only meant it was lunch, and no way in hell did he bring a meal. Can't have people using money on him now, can we?
Nao never said anything about him using the money to take care of himself. She told him as he wrote: Five-thousand yen is the most he could spend of himself per month, the rest is for bills and cleaning supplies. "Just get used to starving," the boy told himself.
Is five-thousand enough to even last a healthy month? Doesn't matter, he just grabs the cheapest item in the convenience store once a week. With extra yen saved from being an unhealthy wreck it is more than possible to get a few good books. There's an easy-to-break vending machine that he'll take from time to time, not like the owner has actually noticed.
Everything was going fine until he was met with Class 3-A students after taking a right. More recognizably, the Five Virtuosos. Just thinking of that stupid title made Karma want to puke whatever was in his stomach.
Ren was the first to notice. "Akabane, what are you-"
"Skipping," he bluntly replied, "Unless you want to be sporting a bruise, let me go. I'm really not in the mood today."
"Not in the mood, you say?" Of course it was the four eyes with a butt chin talking. "Oh, but you-"
Gakushuu, their leader, gave a cold glare at his minion. "Stop it, Koyama." Unlike every other Virtuoso, the strawberry blonde's words are absolute.
Assuming this was his older brother trying to help his dear brother by blood, he was gonna waltz away. Except, did an Asano ever have such a kind heart? "Akabane, get back here."
Rolling his eyes, he faced them and exasperately cried in Italian, "Oh fuck me! Looks like Asano and his four dimwits need to make me want to overdose on melatonin" Reverting to the native language, he stated with at least three octaves dropped, "What?"
It instilled a short-term fear in the side ones. At the end of the day, Karma Akabane is the Kunugigaoka Devil, known for his nasty record. Only Gakushuu kept his composure to reprimand. "You're ditching school and I have gotten a report you beat up five of our students. Do you realize-"
"-how bad that is? Oh, woe is me!" They all gaped when he practically admitted to it while dramatically doing jazz hands. "Go issue a call to my parents for all I care."
"Both your mother and father will be getting a message straight to their inbox, actually." Though he tried not to care and strut away, Karma was going to actually overdose.
When did he beat up five students? Dunno, he didn't. Wasting time with the 'Virtuosos' is enough for him to make lies. Once of sight from anyone he knew, he made a dash to who-knows-where.
By the time he stopped running as far and fast as he could, he collapsed on the ground. Karma was sobbing his heart out. "Shit shit shit. I'm making mother and father waste time on a worthless tool like me again! I'm not robbing that vending machine, I don't even deserve a cheap ass can of caffeine."
From head to toe, his body was shaking. Dammit, how was he this stupid to admit to committing a crime you never did? Mrs. Akabane will be furious to hear his son got into a fight with five kids. It wouldn't be hard to imagine her or her Italian husband flying all the way to Japan to beat him red and purple.
Whatever the price was, the boy would willingly pay it. Be it an arm, leg, and or eye, without hesitation, his calloused hands would clutch the knife and tear at his body until dead. Oh wait- how did it get to this?
Asano junior. It's all his fault. Maybe it was intentional. Just maybe- he made him admit to something he didn't do just so that he could snitch on his little brother that he is a menace.
A monster, they'd say. An abomination created in this world, they'd say. One life not worth living, he'd say. The ugliest, insane, most utterly disappointing failure, he'd say.
"This isn't overreacting. I'm just preparing myself for what I deserve. I'm not wanted by the Asanos. I dare say Shuu did that to get me a chance at expulsion. Before I expel myself and figure out which way to end it, I'll go inform Shuu then my mom." This was in his mind, the last chance at believing he did something right.
To his information, his step-father doesn't mind getting calls as much as his mother. Simple texts would piss her off too. Nao didn't like this idea of going to Kunugigaoka all the way in Japan, but he only went with the persuasion of her husband.
Would Gakushuu read a text from him? Take a call from him? Doesn't matter, as long as the message gets through, it'll be enough.
Karma Akabane
I do not care if you read this, but if you want to know what is happening, go to the park we went to often before the divorce as soon as school is over in four days.
I'm just so tired of chasing something. It feels like I'm going to break (if I haven't). Even if you read this, I highly doubt you'd come.
I'm sorry.
Not once was I the brother you wanted.
I'm so fucking sorry, Gakushuu.
At sometime between four in the fucking morning, Gakushuu's phone rang. And yes, a little buzz will wake him up. Trained to be alert at all times and never miss an alarm, he became the lightest sleeper in the entirety of Japan.
As groggy as he was, he lazily grabbed the phone and tried to read the words. First he noticed was that Karma sent him the message. "Karma? I thought he blocked me or something," which made sense.
Gakushuu knows that deep down in reality, his little brother was kind, caring, and always put others over himself. Sometimes it feels like Karma isn't himself anymore, and it all started after some little squabble they had in their second year of junior high. All eyes only see a violent delinquent that couldn't care less about the world. Sort of hurts to think of it like that at moments.
Then, he paid attention to the messages. His heart shattered right then and there. What did he mean by, 'Not the brother you wanted'? If he asked for anything more, he'd consider himself greedy!
Not just anybody would work their ass off to get into a school like Kunugigaoka just to see their brother by blood. Gakuhou always saw Karma as the lesser son, and that made the strawberry blonde's blood boil piping hot. So what if he missed a few questions or- stuttered on written words?
Asking to go out for an hour shouldn't be hard, right? There's literally countless times of staying out until the sun was setting on Gakushuu's book. Just say it is a meet-up discussing important topics, just tell a strict ass father you are tutoring someone!
Easy as can be.
Few hours later..
"No," the man said.
Gakushuu blinked, but remained composed to say like a robot, "Is there a reason why I may not tutor this student?"
"Asano, I said no." Centipedes literally slithered up and down his neck. "A liar knows when someone is lying."
Maybe not so easy.
Knowing this would get no where, the boy looked down, bowed, and apologized for wasting time. Guess he really isn't going. Fuck, if Karma was a bad brother, then what is he? An outlier so shit that calling him a sibling of someone is like going up to the exam rank results and seeing Asano down at something like- eighty-seven-
Time to head to school, not see Karma, and want to kill yourself for not listening to the one request the redhead has ever given in the past few years. There has to be some way to get the word to him, even if it takes talking to the slumps.