Chapter Text
Words: 780
Pairing:
Gemini
fourth
Fourth's POV:
I've always struggled with anxiety. The constant fear that I'm not good enough. The fear that if I do one wrong thing, i'll end up letting everyone important in my life around me down. It's always a constant thought that is I my head. Every second of every day, I can hear the whispers telling me that I'm not good at what I do. No matter what i accomplish in my life, the fans don't love me and instead are just interested in my characters.
The worst thought of all, though, is when gemini looks at me, I can feel all that pressure way down on me and start telling me that I am freak that he will never love. I can't help my feelings, and I wish they would just go away, but he's always there right on my mind.
"Ugh dammit. This isn't helping. Stop thinking about him, " I said to myself in a whispered tone while sitting in the dressing room backstage, waiting for our event to begin. I had my head in between my legs, trying to calm my breathing. Hoping, and praying that every second that goes by that nobody would see me like this. I hate being vulnerable like this.
As I felt my hands and feet go numb, and my palms began to feel sweaty, I could hear a knock on the door. "Fourth, are you in there? Are you ok? The show is about to start. They want you in the makeup chair," I could hear gemini say from the other side of the door. I couldn't move. It was from the panic attack setting in full force on my chest as I felt it get harder and harder to breathe.
The last thing I saw as I felt my eyes get heavy was the door swing open and a panicked looking gemini staring down at me.
Gemini's POV:
Fourth's been in his dressing room for a while now, and I'm starting to worry about him. I hope he's ok. He always tries to hide when he's sick or when he needs something. He said it makes him feel like he's weak and can't do anything himself.
"Hey gem, can you go get Fourth? we're about to start filming," I heard Mark say to me as he taped me on my shoulder, pulling me out of my thoughts. "Hmm, oh yeah, no problem," I said as I stood up and made my way to his dressing room down the hall.
"Hey, fourth, you ok in there. How are you feeling?" I asked, waiting a bit without any response.
After about a minute, I opened the door, and I felt my chest tighten and felt like I was going to throw up. There he was on the floor, curled up in a ball with his knees to his chest as he squeezed himself in a hug while crying.
"Fourth my god, are you ok?" I said as I quickly stepped to fourths side now on my knees next to him. "What's wrong? Talk to me," I said as I took him in my arms. I could feel my heartbeat fasten, and my mind race with so many different thoughts none were good.
"C-c-cant breathe," He said in a hushed tone close to my chest. "It's ok. I got you. I'm right here. Just listen, and follow my breathing," I said as I started to realize he was having one of his panic attacks. "I can hear your heartbeat, and you can hear mine. I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here with you, " I said as I squeezed him tightly. That always helped when we were younger.
After a few minutes of us sitting there with tears in our eyes, I felt him pull away. "How are you feeling?" I asked, putting our heads together so I could look deeper into his eyes. "Better. So much better now that you're here," he said with a little smile as he grabbed ahold of my hands that were resting on his cheek.
"I'll always be here for you no matter what. I'm not going anywhere. I love you," I said, giving him a little kiss. "I love you too, phi. I'm sorry for not telling you earlier." He said with sadness on his face. "Don't ever apologize for this love. I got you every step of the way,"
"I know you do,"
THE END
Author's Note:
Hello everyone, thanks for reading this. I hope you enjoy it, and I'm sorry if my writing was bad. I'll get better, I promise. Love ya'll, and thanks for the support. Mwah 😘