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He knew something was wrong when the normally short night cycles prolonged for hours. The bright blue sky they normally were showered in had not made its appearance in so long.
Then, it cracked.
He was the first to notice, with his nerves buzzing under his skin and a cold dread seeping into his heart long before the first hairlines started showing. His legs pumped him away from the group, who were calling after him in distress.
Kaito had no time to explain, dashing himself out and to the train. He screamed out to all of the plushies and toys who could follow him, "EVERYONE, FOLLOW ME!"
They were scared, they've never heard his voice like that before, even in shows. It didn't matter yet, not now.
Not now, because time was running out fast.
Kaito's legs were propelling him up and out, his feelings calling for the train. In the distance, he heard the sky break, plunging the world (—his world, his home—!) into darkness.
The train manifested into jumping distance, and he grabbed several of the toys following him and leaped onto the train. Settling them as gently and as fast as he could, he sprinted to the front of the train as fast as his burning legs could. His lungs ached and his virtual heart pumped with adrenaline.
Controlling the train was the easy part, it resonated with his desperate feelings and obeyed. It was making sure everyone, everyone was safe and sound. Plushies and toys lined the passenger cars, yelling and cheering at the windows. Others helped any stragglers that were left behind, forming long chains to pull the few that weren't on the train on.
He turned the train sharply, tracks forming in the sky, and looked back for the first time.
His heart dropped.
The amusement park, being overridden with darkness. Tendrils of black surrounded and suffocated the colorful buildings, burying their brightness. The tide didn't care if it was already destroyed or still whole, it buried everything its suffocating power. In the distance, he saw his fellow virtual singers jumping on the rooftops and leaping away. His blood ran cold, but he was determined to protect everyone. That was his role as a guardian, as a role model.
Kaito would save everyone and keep them safe.
The train resonated with his feelings once more, speeding up. He did a quick headcount of the plushies, only relaxing slightly when he saw everyone was present. The wind bellowed and whipped around his hair and loose clothes from his position on the front.
"This way!" He called out to his friends.
As he neared, the virtual singers jumped onto the train. Len and Luka came aboard with high leaps. Rin was launched on by Meiko with a fast spinning twirl. Meiko herself jumped onto a floating carousel, and then leaped on. Miku was the only one lagging behind.
He turned the train away from the darkness, one of the other virtual singers would control its path. He trusted them. Kaito dashed on top of the roof, his heart racing once again. He landed on the caboose, stretching his hand out.
"Miku!"
Her sparkly eyes widened and she grinned at him. She propelled herself up with a happy grunt, using one of the large bubbles to gain momentum, and they brushed fingers. But their hands never met.
Kaito's heart plummeted again and his hand controlled itself before he could think about what was happening.
Miku was hanging on to him, her grin widening.
For a second, he breathed.
("Kaito~! Your hands are so steady!!")
For a second all was right.
("Ha ha, I hope they are! A responsible role model should have steady hands that can guide!")
And then the tendrils of darkness wrapped around her legs and pulled her in. Her hands slipped from his grasp, her grin turning into a guilty smile. He watched with wide eyes as his friend, his partner for all those long years, was consumed and taken away from him.
He watched, helpless as she looked at him with a face that said, I'm sorry. It's not your fault. Look after everyone, okay?
An explosion, larger than any he's experienced before enveloped her. And then she was gone.
No…that can't be right. No…no. This wasn't supposed to be how it goes. Kaito was supposed to be the steady pillar, supporting everyone and pushing them up when times got rough. Miku was supposed to be the energy that got them back up and inspired new ideas.
So…why did he falter? Why did he let go? Why didn't he pull her up? Why did he lose her when she was just in his grasp?!
The darkness retreated and Kaito watched with unseeing eyes. Where she was taken, a large burn mark tinted with a sickly green was left behind. His knees hurt…ah. He collapsed without noticing.
His hands trembled.
He used those hands (—those hands that lost what was in his grasp—) and pulled himself up. His body guided him, his mind elsewhere. With trembling legs, Kaito found himself inside the train cars with everyone else (—except someone was missing because of him—). The plushies bombarded him with noise that he couldn't decipher, before quickly quieting down after seeing his face.
The virtual singers did something similar, with Len perking up with a "Kaito—!" and faltering after looking at him.
Kaito didn't know what was in his form that made them stop. He didn't know what happened after either, because he was vaguely aware that he collapsed onto a seat, head bowed down.
A maelstrom of grief and guilt consumed him. It burned at his very core, eating away his mind. She was his other half, melded together by years of shared experiences. He was there when she was low, and she was there when he was faltering.
And now she's gone.
She was gone and she wasn't supposed to be gone. She was supposed to stay with him like she did the past ten years. She was never supposed to leave, let alone be taken away. His gut churned, his head throbbed. Everything hurts.
The train slowed to a stop and everyone hesitantly got up. One by one, they left him alone. At some point he noticed that they put a thick blanket over his head and body. The weight barely comforted him because the weight of his actions, or rather inactions, dragged down more.
A shaky breath, then several. Then Kaito gathered himself together as best as he could. As much as he could. The broken feeling, the sensation that something was taken and missing never left but he tried his best to gather as many pieces as he could. As many pieces to be able to function once again, to just carry out his basic tasks. Drowning in self-pity and guilt wouldn't bring her back.
So he got up. Took another shaky breath. And left the empty car. (—it was like him, missing an integral part of himself and feeling a void in his chest—).
One step at a time he told himself. It was the only way he knew how to move, out of his grief and out of the car. Kaito still couldn't look at everyone else's eyes. The rational part of him knew they wouldn't blame him for failing, but the emotional part of him wished they held him accountable. (He was so close to his goal, almost everyone was on the train, and if he just pulled then—)
Instead, he looked towards his home. Lights flickers and the rides creaked.They wouldn't work for a long time, from his guess. It was dark, an unending night had fallen upon them. Buildings were worse for wear, their bright and positive colors dulled out by gashes and lingering black. Lights flickered, never fully turning back on for more than a few seconds. The damage was somehow worse and better than he imagined.
Kaito didn't expect it to affect him so much. The structures were still there and it could always be fixed but…It would scar. Something taken could never be brought back no matter how they tried to replace it.
Lead-like fingers tightened where they gripped the blanket around him. It didn't feel like a part of his body and a part of him itched to just— Kaito took another breath, resisting the urge to scream until his virtual throat was raw.
It would be fine. They would fix this. He would be able to get everything back together. Starting by folding this blanket. Taking it off his shoulders had allowed the cold to seep into his limbs, the previous warmth fading away. He carried the folded blanket until he saw their tent.
Just looking at it widened up an open wound, and he tried his best to stitch the gap in his heart. It was surprisingly still standing, only a few rips and tears around the edges. For a second, in the corner of his eyes he saw a familiar blue dash towards the tent and he whipped his head over, only to find nothing. Disappointment brewed in his chest and he stifled it as best as he could.
Meiko exited the tent, several pieces of broken wood and metal on her shoulders. When they met eyes, he watched as they widened and he stood stock-still. He watched as she scrambled to put down the scrap in an open and safe area before jogging to him with a concerned look.
When she neared, Kaito could see every crease in her brows, every worried wrinkle. How a mix of sympathy and distress lined her expression. She cupped his face, gentle and compassionate, as if he was one of the kids.
"Kaito…you did the best that you could."
He looked away. It would have been easier to accept disdain. Footsteps approached and his eyes flickered over to the source. The rest of the virtual singers came closer.
They had similar expressions, faces sad and concerned. The younger ones like Len and Rin had trembling mouths that they tried to mold into a smile. Luka was wide awake, a somber yet comforting mood following her.
It was all so kind. He didn't deserve it.
"Kaito! We'll do anything to help you!" Rin exclaimed. "You don't have to shoulder everything by yourself!"
Len nodded along, "Yes, yes! We'll do anything and everything, as long as we can help you!"
"Ah, what they said. I'm not going to be sleepy anytime soon." Luka said, smiling.
Kaito looked at all of them, his eyes starting to burn. Rin and Len were so determined to help, Luka knowing that she's not going to be sleeping because everything wasn't right. Meiko and her strong touch. He certainly wasn't as alone anymore, but the void in his heart was slowly getting filled.
"I know. I know everyone. I trust you." He smiled, eyes closing and relieving the burning feeling.
Slowly they left him be, already continuing to clean up and repair their home. Kaito himself went over to the plushies, checking their health and wellness. Everybody just seemed shaken, not hurt anywhere. With every person he checked and looked over, his body became lighter in a way. The subtle feeling of wrongness never left though.
He tried to do other tasks and help around, but it seemed like every time he tried to start something, the others would interrupt and take over.
"Kaito~! Let me do that!"
"Ah, I can take over, don't worry about it."
"The plushies need you, Kaito! Let me finish that!"
"Kaito, go sit down, let me lift all of that."
It was all odd. Maybe they were trying to make him sit back and relax. It was a nice thought, but doing nothing left him agitated and itching for something. All the inaction never fit his role. And he had a feeling that Tsukasa and the others wouldn't be able to visit for a few hours. The feelings that made up the core of this world were shaken by that helpless and despairing darkness. It would take a while for its true feelings to return to a precarious balance.
It didn't help that the sky was still dark. In the darkness, Kaito couldn't help but feel a sense of dread. It wasn't a comforting darkness, illuminated by warm light and a feeling of rest. No, it was a night filled with slow recovery and aching pain.
He looked up to the sky. The hole where it cracked and gushed out a flood was already starting to patch up. Cracks were still visible, black void just barely visible again the night. He noticed the distinct lack of sparkling stars.
Shaking his head, he breathed again. Kaito couldn't afford to break now. He started to pick up the debris that the flood left behind. It was an odd rock-like material. It pulsed red and if he looked really hard, they would form the numbers '0' and '1.'
Kaito gathered them up, filling his arms with as much as he could. He walked around looking for the piles of scrap he could dump these broken numbers in. When Kaito gathered as much as he could and the area was somewhat cleaner, a small feeling of accomplishment bloomed.
"What are these?" Rin asked, appearing and crouching down to touch the debris.
"I don't know. They were left behind after…" Kaito trailed off, feeling slightly faint.
Rin understood immediately without another word. She shivered, "They're so sad…"
He tilted his head. Rin was right, now that he thought about it. The small amounts he brought everytime only felt slightly uncomfortable, so he chalked it up to his grief and regret. Now, when all of them were gathered together, it felt like a radiating sense of disappointment and defeat.
"Rin, you might want to get away from them." He said with a serious tone.
She obeyed immediately, the corners of her mouth weighed down. Her eyes held curiosity and a questioning look.
Kaito smiled reassuringly, but it was harder than usual to make. "Why don't we see what the others are doing?"
She cheered, bouncing up and down and leading the way. Even though it wasn't as happy as it could be considering the circumstances, it was still so familiar that it ached. He followed Rin, before leaving once he knew that she was safe with Meiko.
He found himself alone near the train. It took no effort to propel himself onto the roof and land gracefully. Alone on the roof, Kaito gazed up to the dim stars and watched. With a rational mind, he started to look back and remember. Of his failures, his small successes. He sat alone and looked back.
Soon, toys started to gather around him, sensing his mood and trying to cheer him up. From the corner of his eye, he saw the virtual singers approaching. And then, he heard the sound of people entering the Sekai.
Kaito looked, watching the light bloom and emerge, before fading away and leaving scared and confused teens in place. He looked away, guilty and not wanting to break the news to them.
How was he supposed to tell them how he failed to save the person who mattered dearly to him? To them?
It turned out, he didn't have to. Because Meiko spoke up instead of him. He tensed hearing the words out loud, furious at how he could have prevented it but didn't.
"Miku…the darkness swallowed her up." He heard Meiko say to them. Kaito couldn't bare to see their faces of distress and denial knowing it was his fault that she was taken.
Somehow, he found himself speaking. Kaito looked at his hand (—his hand that wasn't strong enough—) that trembled and clenched it. It was almost hard enough to break skin.
"We…I couldn't do anything."
The movement of the plushies trying to cheer him up increased and he heard Len yell, "You did everything you could, Kaito!"
He clenched his hand again, before letting it fall to his chest. Kaito lowered his head, letting his hair cover his face. Talking about it summoned all of his feelings of guilt and failure to terrorize his mind. He breathed heavily, before getting up and jumping down to the ground.
Something inside of him itched to perform, to sing. He didn't know what it was, but looking at his fellow virtual singers confirmed the fact that they felt this call too.
Kaito led all of them, looking back with an unreadable face.
"Come on, we have something to show you."
They led the young troupe into the tent, with him uncharacteristically silent. He took up the stage, followed by Meiko, Rin, Len, and Luka. Together they sang that song that the other her constantly repeated like a mantra.
"Someday, our frequencies will meet."
"Somehow, the veils will lift."
He gathered his voice, urging it to stay strong. "That bright future had me at hello."
"In my 'SEKAI' all alone."
"All this time I sang that song."
"Connecting now."
"Intertwining now."
"I've never seen this sight."
They alternated lines, voices coming together in a wonderful blend. All five of them sang the song that the other her used as her lighthouse, as her anchor. He hoped it reached the both of them. A determined expression came across his face as he used that thought as a foundation. Something to ground him.
"Till the day we reveal that to each other." His hand, the same one that held her and lost her, extended to the sky, illuminated by the spotlight.
They all joined for the last line. It wasn't a complete song by any chance, but it was close. "No doubt, SEKAI is forever."
Wonderlands x Showtime looked at them in awe. Thoughts ran through their heads, visible in their eyes.
Rui tilted his head, hand on his chin with a serious expression. "Was that the rest of the other Miku's song?"
"Hold on, how did you guys know about it?!" Tsukasa exclaimed.
Kaito felt all eyes on him. He looked down, "I…don't know. But my heart and body wanted to sing, and that song came out."
On the stage next to him, all he heard were affirmations. When he looked to the audience, all he could see were faces of wonder and amazement. They got off the stage, and the theater troupe got on. They brainstormed ideas to help both of the Mikus, to convey their message of guidance and acceptance. Their message of 'It's okay to have hard days, we'll try our best to help you surpass them all with a smile!'
The routine-like structure of it helped Kaito ground himself and slowly he was starting to believe their idea would actually work. Several days of nonstop practicing and performing distracted his mind from breaking. It was nice to settle into something familiar.
When the day of their performance came, Kaito could feel their feelings of hope and optimistic beliefs pulsing throughout the Sekai. From all the way in the Sekai, he could feel and see their emotions resonating. Small cracks disappeared, and the lights started to stay on for longer than a few minutes and eventually for almost an hour.
Then, the sky glowed a magnificent white light, the cracks shining before fading away completely.
Something blue and red came falling in, twirling and twisting through the air. It left behind trails of colorful triangles, almost magical, that repaired everything that it touched. His breath caught in his throat, making it hard to breathe. The light spread as she got closer and closer, mending all of the damage with a soft, gleaming warmth.
Rin, Len, and Meiko ran to greet her with excited cheers. In a few seconds, Wonderlands x Showtime travelled back inside to see their work, with beads of sweat still on their skin. They all gathered around her, some misty eyes but all so, so thankful.
Kaito lingered in the back, hesitant.
Rationally, he knew she didn't blame him for anything. But some part of him wanted her to. Wanted her to hold some kind of accountability towards him. But he knew she wouldn't.
His mouth opened before he thought about it, forcing him to come closer and face them head on. "Miku..."
Attention was focused on him. His eyebrows scrunched, and he closed his eyes to relieve the stinging before opening them again.
He looked at them, and then flickered his gaze down. "I'm sorry I couldn't save you…"
Miku exclaimed, "Eeeeeehh?! But here I am! Good as ever!"
She twirled around, a huge smile on her face. His heart swelled, his quick eye looking for any scratches or stains but finding none. Kaito's eyes softened, and he matched her smile with a small one.
"Thank goodness." He said quietly.
The troupe continued to talk to Miku, talking about how important she was to them. How it wouldn't be the same without her. He found himself agreeing with every word.
Then, crystallic rocks started to fall gently from the sky. They all looked around in surprise.
"Wow~! I think the other me has something to say to you all!" Miku says, looking around with wonder. His heart ached, he missed that look in her eyes.
Tsukasa's bewildered face became serious, passion and determination flowing through his words. "Well! Let's see what she wants to say, shall we?"
They all shared smiles and caught a small crystal within their hands. Miku and Kaito waved them away as their bodies were enveloped in a familiar light and faded away to the different Sekai.
Kaito sniffed, suddenly overwhelmed. His eyes stung and burned unlike anything he's felt before. A sob snuck through his mouth, bringing everything down like an avalanche.
Miku turned around in distress, hands fanning around him unsure of what to do. He looked at her with blurry eyes and it finally settled in that she's back.
Hands controlled themselves and he brought her close to himself. She paused, in shock, before quickly recovering and returning his tight hug with a tighter one.
She's back.
His knees buckled at his revelation, sobs growing every second. She gently lowered the both of them to the ground, her hand absentmindedly carding through his hair like he was a child.
She's back.
Their fellow virtual singers came running after hearing the sobs, expecting the worst. They quickly slowed their pace after seeing Miku's smile and joined their hug when they neared.
She's back. She was gone and Kaito lost her but she's back and she's real and she's here.
"T-thank goodness..! I-I missed you, so, so much." He blubbered like a child, knowing he would probably look back at this moment in embarrassment. But it didn't matter right now.
"Please…don't leave us again. I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry I could save you!"
He sniffed, tightening his hold around her. Every minute that passed solidified his belief that she's here and she's here to stay. He soon realized that everyone in the pile was also crying because of his waterworks. They stammered similar statements, full of emotions. The weight of all of them grounded him and he was so grateful.
When his eyes were clear enough to see her face, Kaito was pleasantly surprised to see her sparkling eyes hold a mature look in her eyes. Her smile was knowing and happy, not even phased by their tear stains on her clothes.
One by one, they all got up with small sniffles and a lingering redness in their eyes. Kaito was sure he was the worst of all of them. Miku stood up, holding a hand out for him.
He looked at it for a fraction of a second before taking it with a teary smile.
He grabbed her hand, and all was right.
(If he stayed stuck closely to her the next few days, as if he was still confirming she was real, Miku never said a word. Instead she just took his hand and led him around with a smile.)