Chapter Text
Sorting things out.
BURN ALL GAYS: guys…
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: what is it pookie bear
#1 Master Baiter: guys why is this still my name
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: SHHHHH my goldfishie tis speaking…gosh kids these days
#1 Master Baiter: Floyd I’m deducting your pay if you don't SHUT YOUR GOOFY ASS UP
Does no wrong: GUYS QUIET CYOTEES
No wrong: Kalim, that's not how you spell coyotes…
BURN ALL GAYS: GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!! The gc got leaked…
#1 Master Baiter: WHAT
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: NO
Does no wrong: NO WAY JOSE >:O
No wrong: what.
BROKIE: GANGALANG WHAT R WE YAPPIN AB???
Does no wrong: GIRL THE GC JUST GOT LEAKED
BROKIE: AINT NO WAY….
Does no wrong: YES WAY
The Lesser Fetus: My my, it seems as though this is a bit of a dilemma
BROKIE: JADE SHUT UP WITH UR FANCY TALK
The Lesser Fetus: this is why you're BROKE BITCH
BURN ALL GAYS: CHOP CHOP LETS STAY ON TRACK
BROKIE: H H H HELL NAHHHHH
Gold: bro i just got here
Gold: why is some shit always going on…
BURN ALL GAYS: RUGGIE IM BOUTA ONE TWO POP UR ASS
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: GOLDFISHIE GET HIS ASS!!!
BROKIE: BOY WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN
BURN ALL GAYS: man idek
BROKIE: shiiiiii
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: zamn the beef aint even last a whole min
Gold: wow i see how it is…ignoring my ahh
Does no wrong: SILVER!!! HIIIIII :D
Gold: hello Kalim
Gold: anyway, mind explaining how the gc got leaked???
BURN ALL GAYS: ok so basically, it was all RUGGIE
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: GASP
BROKIE: man tf did i do
Gold: zamn it always do be ruggie tho
BURN ALL GAYS: i may have left my phone on the table…but…trey got his hands on it and a notif may have appeared from azul and he immediately decided to interrogate me…and well we all know DAMN WELL who chose azul’s name
The Lesser Fetus: Riddle…this appears to be your fault
BURN ALL GAYS: what if i beat ur ass
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: oohhhh
The Lesser Fetus: Hm…we shall see about that
BROKIE: why is bro always on that fancy shiii
The Lesser Fetus: Maybe you simply cannot understand because you are BROKE.
BROKIE: always going for my brokenness…get creative
The Lesser Fetus: BOY you do not want to see me get creative.
BROKIE: try me BITCH
The Lesser Fetus: This is why you’re a flea bag with no family, at least I have a mama…
BROKIE: zamn right to the throat ALSO I DO NOT HAVE FLEES U SLIMY ASSHOLE U PROLLY HAVE TEETH GROWIN FROM UR ASS WITH ALL THAT WEIRD SHIIT U GOT GOIN ON
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: GYATT DAMN NOT THE ASS TEETH
Gold: zamn that was wack…
#1 Master Baiter: …
No wrong: Ruggie definitely has fleas though
Does no wrong: maybe the real fleas and ass teeth were the friends we made along the way
Gold: Hold up let Kalim cook
No wrong: Kalim has not cooked a day in his life
Gold: HOLY LORD…Kalim r u just gonna take that???
Does no wrong: GIRL IM GONNA TELL ON U TO NAJMA…
No wrong: HELL NO DO NOT TEST ME
BURN ALL GAYS: damn bros being told on
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: yall actin like id let this happen…
#1 Master Baiter: Floyd if you dont stfu im gonna clock ur ass
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: JADE GET UR MAN
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: JADE???
Gold: nahhh Jade dead after the ass teeth accusations
Does no wrong: does that mean their true??? :O
No wrong: wrong their, Kalim
BROKIE: HELL YEAH I DROVE HIS ASS AWAY
#1 Master Baiter: You may want to watch your back Ruggie, Jade just left the lounge
BROKIE: oh shit
Gold: nah bro dead
BURN ALL GAYS: we boutta be looking down on him
No wrong: damn bro aint even going to heaven…
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: so crazy that Jamil broke the grammar
Does no wrong: RIP ruggie, he will be missed
No wrong: no he won’t…
Does no wrong: *I will miss him
No wrong: you would miss everyone be so fr
Does no wrong: yeah :D
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: this is too wholesome
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: i secretly hate all of you and have sent a hit man after u guys
BURN ALL GAYS: assuming i wouldn’t be able to beat the hitman’s ass…ammeture…
Does no wrong: omg that reminds me of that time my little sister’s mom sent an assassin after me :)
BURN ALL GAYS: …
Gold: …
#1 Master Baiter: …
No wrong: I thought I told you not to talk about traumatic events as if they’re normal…
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: wait ur sister has a different mom????
BROKIE: aint no way thats what bro got from all that
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: woah ur alive??? zamn i was hoping u were 6 feet under the sea…
Does no wrong: isnt it 6 feet under??????
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: yeah thats what i said??
Gold: nah the gaslighting is crazy
No wrong: only im allowed to gaslight Kalim….
Gold: nahhhh thats a wild statement
BROKIE: i ran like hell
The Lesser Fetus: I see you
BROKIE: BRO ON THAT OMINOUS SHIT
No wrong: bro better start running faster
Does no wrong: run boy run!!!
Gold: hes dead as hell
BURN ALL GAYS: guys…rlly bad news…
Gold: oh shit
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: GOLDFISHIE WHAT IS IT??
BURN ALL GAYS: trey told EVERYONE (cater, ace, deuce) in heartsawhatsit and cater wants to make a gc…
BROKIE: ahssay noo
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: bro is still running for his life
Does no wrong: a gc could be cool! :D
No wrong: lying is a sin
Does no wrong: I would never lie
Gold: me when i lie
The Lesser Fetus: A groupchat with everyone could be beneficial
#1 Master Baiter: I do agree.
BROKIE: NOASJDSAOD
No wrong: thanks for the input
BURN ALL GAYS: guys i literally CANNOT say no to cater…
No wrong: well now's the time to learn
#1 Master Baiter: Hm
Gold: I’ll see u guys on the other side
BROKIE: well its been fun…
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: i thot bro was busy running
BURN ALL GAYS: Floyd never shorten thought to thot ever again
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: anything for u bae
BURN ALL GAYS: do not call me bae
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: ok snookums
BURN ALL GAYS: …
BROKIE: ANYWAY im going to interrupt their weird version of flirting
#1 Master Baiter: Thank you…
Does no wrong: its the day of the reckoning guys
No wrong: DONT SAY OMINOUS SHIT
BROKIE: betrayal from trey so crazy it be reminding me of jamil and kalim ♥️
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: HELLLLL NAHHH
No wrong: …
Does no wrong: …
Gold: ooooo bro got the … from Kalim, Ruggie is cooked
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: nahhh bro got enemies on all sides
BROKIE: i will not miss ANY of yall when i go to heaven
BURN ALL GAYS: bro is NOT going to heaven
#1 Master Baiter: You are not going to heaven Ruggie…the denial is strong in this one
BROKIE: nahhhh…
BURN ALL GAYS: guys trey just asked why the gc is called Sorting things out…
BROKIE: NO DONT DISCLOSE ANY INFO
No wrong: thats a big word for Ruggie, I’m surprised he even knows what it means
Does no wrong: ruggie can be very smart!!! :D
Gold: me when i lie…
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: notice how we always end up bullying ruggie
The Lesser Fetus: It is well deserved.
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: damn the beef is still going strong
Unnamed Chat
Cater Diamond added Riddle Rosehearts, Ace Trappola, Trey Clover, Deuce Spade, and Others
Trey Clover: hey guys
Cater Diamond: HEYYYYYY!1!!
Leona Kingscholar: yo wtf is this
Ruggie Bucchi: man i got no idea
Riddle Rosehearts: Greetings
Sorting Things Out.
BROKIE: GUYS THE RIDDLE SWITCHUP IS CRAZY…
BURN ALL GAYS: SHHHHH
SQUEEZE ALL GAYS: #not my goldfishie
Does no wrong: NOT RUGGIE ACTING LIKE HE HAS NO CLUE
BROKIE: I CANNOT HAVE ANYONE QUESTIONING ME
Unnamed Chat
Floyd Leech: HI GOLDFISHIE
Ace Trappola: goldfishie???
Trey Clover: its floyd’s nickname for riddle
Ace Trappola: ohhhhh how has riddle not beaten his ass yet???
Trey Clover: trust me, hes tried
Riddle Rosehearts: …
Sorting things out.
BURN ALL GAYS: AZUL DO THE THING!!!!!
#1 Master Baiter: On it
Unnamed Chat
Azul Ashengrotto changed Riddle Rosehearts, Trey Clover, Floyd Leech, Jade Leech, and Other’s Nicknames…
Azul: Well well well
Smuggles Alcohol: HIIIIII
Smuggles Alcohol: wait
Kicked a dog one time and never got over it: YOU DO WHAT
Kicked a dog one time and never got over it: wait GUYS PLS I DIDNT MEAN TO
Jumped out of a window to get away from a spider: ….
Jumped out of a window to get away from a spider: I did NOT do this
Blueberry Blast Vape: LMAO
Blueberry Blast Vape: oh shit
Blueberry Blast Vape: azul i thought everyone agreed to never talk ab the blueberry blast vape….
Got on all fours and barked at a certain someone as a way of flirting: WHAT YALL KNOW AB THE BLUBRRY BLAST VAPE
Got on all fours and barked at a certain someone as a way of flirting: yah i did that
Slapped Floyd Leech: nahhh bros proud of it…
Slapped Floyd Leech: and id do it again
Was the certain someone: STOP NOT THE BLUBBRRRY BLAST VAPE…
Was the certain someone: hey this isnt that bad
Got on all fours and barked at a certain someone as a way of flirting: hey bae ;)
Was the certain someone: do NOT call me that bro…
Azul: Enough of that. Well, getting back to the point, if you are able to guess who is who I will give each of you your names back. ALSO, if you second years know each other's names DON'T GIVE IT AWAY.
Drugged a birthday cake: huh who knew the second years were in cahoots (I knew)
Fist fought a grown man: kahoot…like the hit game kahoot…
Kicked a dog one time and never got over it: HELL YEAH KAHOOT I FUCKING LOVE KAHOOT NOTHING CULD EVER BEAT IT!!!1111!!!!
Fist fought a grown man: found ace
Kicked a dog one time and never got over it: ...shit
Fist fought a grown man: dumb ahhh
Has a tattoo: Ace your acrually slow…
Kicked a dog one time and never got over it: SHUT UP WHOEVER YOU ARE
Azul changed one name
Ace: oh hey im back to normal
Slapped Floyd Leech: im almost jelous
Smuggles Alcohol: no u arent :D
Slapped Floyd Leech: just bc im proud of my actions doesnt mean anything
Was the certain someone: mmmmmk bud…