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Adrien often longed for the past when his life had been boring.
Before his mother got ill. Before his father lost his mind from grief and became a supervillain. Before Adrien was forced to help him.
He still didn't know all the details about how his father had found two Miraculouses - the Butterfly which he used and the Black Cat which he had given to him. But he knew that for his father's plan to work, they needed another one - that of the ladybug. Only then could his father make a wish to bring his mother back.
Adrien helped him. Of course he did. Gabriel was his father after all and he also wanted his mother back. But more often than not he found himself thinking that the whole thing was crazy. It couldn't be as simple as just wishing someone back.
There was another thing as well. As much as he forced himself to help his father's minions, the poor people who fell victim to his machinations because of their negative emotions, he never got a taste for hurting people. In particular the girl who was his main opponent and held the Miraculous that they needed.
It probably sounded crazy. It shouldn't be this hard to beat a girl, right? Except that she was a very clever and elusive girl. Even though she drove him crazy, because his father always blamed him for failing to capture her, Adrien couldn't deny this.
Even when she came up with the craziest plans and somehow managed to get his butt kicked, he couldn't help admiring her. She often had help, other good girls and guys that only showed up occasionally. But it was clear that she was the mastermind behind it all.
He was intrigued. To the point that when she actually made a mistake and fell into his waiting paws, he couldn't just finish it all.
He found himself taunting her.
"So this is it, spots," he smirked, enjoying seeing her squirm and try to get out of his hold.
"You wish," she hissed.
But he had her cornered. Her ally was off fighting the akuma of the day. No one could help her. And Adrien had her right there, against the chimney, his hands gripping her wrists and a leg trapping hers in case she got any ideas about kicking him where it hurt the most.
"Just admit that you lost. No one is here to help you," he looked down at her.
She was out of breath, still struggling to get out, but she didn't look scared. Just another sign that he wasn't good at this. He wasn't an intimidating foe. But this didn't matter. Because he had her at his mercy. He was going to prove to his father that he was good for something.
"And who is going to help you?" She said suddenly, a calculating look in her eyes. This confused him. Did she have a plan after all?
This was when he felt her stop fighting. The momentum had him lean against her until they were basically nose to nose.
He felt the breath hitch in his chest. She was too close. What was more, this seemed not to trouble her at all.
Because before he could right himself and put distance between them, she moved, as fast as lightning, and her lips covered his.
Adrien froze, unable to compute what was happening for an embarrassing moment. Then, to his shame, he felt himself yielding to the surprising touch.
Her lips were warm and it felt as if she knew what she was doing. It felt nice, there was no way around it. Not to mention that it was as if something had sparked between them at this closer, intimate contact.
Adrien tilted his head to the side and leaned in. It might have been his imagination but it sounded as if she was the one startled this time. Before she recovered and her lips moved, sweeping him along.
It was exquisite. They seemed to fit so well, sensing what felt good and falling into the right rhythm almost right sway. They moved together, neither of them establishing dominance. Their mouths opened simultaneously, seeking more and getting it.
The slick, hot touch of her tongue made Adrien dizzy. He had never felt anything this divine and an embarrassing sound rose in the back of his throat.
If this had been her plan all along, he didn't care. The truth was that this didn't feel like an angry, vengeful kiss. It felt disarmingly sincere.
So when they eventually broke apart, trying to catch their breath, Adrien felt his hold on her ease.
Ladybug was flushed, her eyes wide and confused. As if this had caught her off guard. But she soon saw the way out and squirmed out of his grasp.
He didn't try to stop her. Even the realisation that he'd messed up and he'd have to face his father's wrath, again, didn't help him snap out of it.
The storm inside his heart left him as weak as a kitten. He was in trouble. So much trouble.
***
They were back to the familiar back and forth. Ladybug's plans kept her away from Adrien. They never got this close or alone together again.
He should have been glad. It had been bad enough to fall for her tricks once. He had made a fool of himself and he felt ashamed. His father hadn't been happy but at least he didn't know all the details. Only that Ladybug had escaped once again.
Adrien avoided thinking about this. He had been played like a fool. He didn't want to remember that kiss. It had felt genuine but had been anything but.
He shouldn't think otherwise. What was more, he shouldn't want it to be different. She was the enemy. He didn't want to hurt her, but he had no choice but to do what his father wanted of him.
Having any feelings for her, apart from pity, would be crazy.
But he was bad at convincing himself that. She was always in his dreams, kissing him until he forgot his own name. He wanted to believe that his imagination was that good, that the memory of that kiss couldn't possibly be this potent. It didn't matter anyway. The result was the same.
As long as she kept her distance, he was going to be fine. He could avoid looking her in the eye or addressing her directly for as long as possible. And hopefully with time it would get better.
It didn't. If anything, it got worse. Adrien felt clumsy and more uncertain than ever. Attacking anyone, but specifically Ladybug, felt wrong.
He felt his self-control slip through his fingers. It made him angry at himself. Was he this easy to sway? Just a kiss and he was this close to giving up.
It didn't matter what he told himself. This attraction or whatever it was was irrational. It was as if he'd had a taste of something addictive and now he was hooked. He needed more. He wanted it.
His only consolation was that Ladybug seemed out of shape as well. Their constant dance of clever attacks and poor deflections felt stilted. It was as if they were acting being enemies, but no longer felt like it.
Adrien was at the end of his tether after another night of troubling dreams. He was distracted and basically walked into the trap waiting for him.
He felt the string of the yo-yo wrap around him before a body slammed into him from behind, pushing him against a wall.
He should have been alarmed, ready for a fight, but the truth was that the warm touch just eased an ache inside of him. She was right there.
"I hate you so much," she muttered in his ear, clearly angry.
"What did I do to you?" He all but laughed. "I've barely touched you. I've never hurt you."
It was the simple truth. He'd always spared her. Recently even more.
For a few seconds all he could hear was her harsh breathing. Then he felt her forehead rest between his shoulder blades. Almost as if in surrender.
"I can't stop thinking about that kiss." The whispered words no longer sounded angry. A part of Adrien melted.
"Should I remind you that it was you who kissed me?" He said softly.
"I was just trying to distract you," she groaned. "It wasn't meant to be this... "
"Real?"
Another groan.
"Get out of my head. Out of my life. I don't need this."
And yet she wasn't moving away.
"If it's any consolation, I also think about it." Constantly. Frustratingly. Irresistibly.
The warm pressure against Adrien's back was gone and he felt himself being rotated until they were face to face.
Ladybug looked deeply troubled.
"This is crazy."
She was still so close, it made thinking hard. But he still knew what she meant.
"I know."
He half expected her to go off at him again. But she looked almost resigned. Her free hand was suddenly on his chest. The moment she felt the taut string holding him in place, its hold eased. And then her hand moved up, almost like a caress, until it rested against his cheek.
"We can't... " She whispered, her expression pained.
He knew that this could be the biggest mistake he'd ever make. But he felt that this wasn't a trick. The emotions on her face, in her eyes, in her touch, felt genuine. He wanted to believe her.
It was dangerous. It was crazy, she was right. But they both felt it and were apparently helpless against it.
Their eyes met in a charged moment. Conflicting feelings battled in hers, but her touch remained gentle, loving. And then, with a gasp, she pulled the yo-yo string and he was free.
The ball was in his court. She was giving him an out. The way he had done the previous time.
But Adrien no longer wanted to run away. Instead, his arms closed around her and pulled her to him.
He glanced at her lips and heard her sigh as her hand sneaked into his hair.
This time he kissed her. While he felt the touch of her lips to the tips of his toes, he kept it soft and simple. This kiss was a confession. A mutual surrender. They could keep the rest for later.
So much was at stake, it was insane how easily they could brush their worries aside for this shared moment.
Adrien couldn't fight it anymore. Because the warmth in his heart, the instant relief at her touch, the way she welcomed him, felt right. Being with her felt like the right choice much more than fighting on his father's side ever had.
Maybe they were doomed. Or maybe together they had a better chance to save this world from his father's madness. Only time would tell.
Until then, they had this. They both wanted it and they were going to fight for it.