Chapter Text
Suho was madly in love with the prettiest girl in high school, Min Ji. She was perfection made person: beautiful, smart, kind, and charismatic. Everyone wanted a chance with her, and Suho was no exception. For a while, he had wanted to confess, but his shyness had stopped him. However, when Min Ji began to pay attention to him and be kind, Suho started to think that maybe he had a chance. So he decided to take the step and confess, as was typical of his impulsive nature.
He slowly walked toward Min Ji’s classroom, hands in his pants pockets. Since the night before, he had been practicing what he would say: “I’d like to know if you want to go out with me today.” He repeated the phrase in his mind, planning to invite her to dinner and then confess his feelings. However, he wondered if “go out” sounded like a date. “Should I say ‘go on a date with me’ instead?” He was so absorbed in his thoughts that he didn’t notice Baku, his friend, was talking to him.
Suddenly, he felt a push that made him lean forward. Turning around, he saw Baku pushing his head with his hand. “Can’t you hear? Are you deaf?” said Baku with a smile. Suho just rolled his eyes. “I was trying to ignore you, isn’t it obvious?” he joked.
“Right in the heart!” Baku dramatized, placing a hand on his chest and pretending to be offended. “Yah!” he exclaimed, hitting him on the head. Suho flinched and touched the spot where he had been hit, looking at him with reproachful eyes. He wanted to respond, but the words stuck in his throat.
“That hurt! Why’d you hit me?” he protested, raising his hand as if to hit him back. But before doing so, he held back and sped up, leaving Baku behind.
Baku laughed and caught up, throwing an arm over his shoulders. “I’m good company, you know,” he said proudly. Suho sighed, half annoyed, half amused. He knew Baku was a good friend.
“By the way, Suho,” Baku continued, “I want you to help me with a favor, my friend. I’ll give you food in exchange.” He ruffled Suho’s hair. “I’m not into the girl from the restaurant anymore; that’s old news.” Suho laughed at the memory. “The one who gave you a nine-digit number?”
“Yeah… well, maybe she made a mistake giving it to me,” Baku tried to justify, even though he knew those girls weren’t interested in him.
“Anyway, that doesn’t matter. There’s another girl I like! We’ve been talking, and it seems like she’s into me,” Baku said, puffing his chest with pride. “Maybe she’s just being nice?” Suho asked. Seeing his friend’s expression, he cleared his throat. “Well, it doesn’t matter. It’s great you found someone.” Then, with a mischievous smile, he added, “We could have a double date.”
Baku got it instantly. “Wahhh! Really? Who’s the girl who has you so excited? Although, you’ve been an idiot since birth,” Baku said, excited for his friend. Suho rolled his eyes and stuck out his tongue. “I’m not telling you.”
Suho began to imagine their dates: he and Min Ji holding hands, walking down the street, while Baku and his girl did the same. Then at a restaurant, sharing food with romantic music, like in the movies. At an amusement park, enjoying the rides or even at an ice cream shop.
However, Suho knew reality would be different. In reality, he and Min Ji would be holding hands, but with the other hand, Suho would be holding Sieun’s hand. At the restaurant, instead of feeding Min Ji, he’d be feeding Sieun. At the amusement park, they’d go on kiddie rides, since Sieun didn’t like thrill rides, and they wouldn’t even go to the ice cream shop, because Sieun wasn’t a big fan of ice cream.
“In short, I need your help to ask her out. I want you to be there just in case. I bought flowers, a stuffed animal, chocolates, and balloons. You’ll carry the balloons and chocolates,” he said proudly. No doubt, he’s egocentric!
“Are you really in love? Because you usually don’t spend money, not even when you lose bets,” Suho commented, pretending to be surprised. “I don’t want to feed the poor like you,” Baku replied, sticking out his tongue before running off and leaving Suho behind.
“Hey!” Suho shouted, amused, and chased after him.
“No running in the hallways!” the principal shouted. “Suho, put on your uniform shirt! Come here right now.”
It was recess time. Suho was anxiously waiting for Baku, leaning against a tree near a fountain. He was hungry and tired, and he hadn’t been able to talk to Sieun. Had he eaten? He felt desperate, since he always brought Sieun some food, knowing he didn’t eat during breaks.
Finally, Baku arrived. “I thought you chickened out of confessing. I imagined you crying in the bathroom, like always,” Suho joked, though a bit annoyed. Baku laughed awkwardly.
“Shut up. I don’t do that anymore. Here, come with me. She’s sitting on that bench,” he said, pointing to the girl.
Suho looked at her and found her familiar, but didn’t focus on that because Baku handed him the chocolates and balloons. He didn’t want to ruin his friend’s confession.
When they arrived, Suho stayed back, holding the gifts. He felt embarrassed, but it was all for the food. He wondered what he craved more: ox bone soup or tteokbokki?
“Suho,” Baku whispered. “Give her the balloons and chocolates.” Suho didn’t hear his confession and was thankful he hadn’t, because if standing there was embarrassing, Baku’s situation was even more so.
He laughed nervously as he approached the girl. As he handed her the gifts and looked at her face, he felt the air leave his lungs. The girl was… Min Ji.
Was Min Ji the girl Baku liked? That was absurd. How didn’t he realize it?
Min Ji was surprised to see him and quickly took the gifts, looking away and laughing nervously. Suho stood frozen, looking at her sadly.
“Wait… that guy, Suho. Wasn’t he in love with Min Ji? Why does it look like he’s helping his friend win her over? How weird,” a girl passing by said to her friend.
Suho felt like a bucket of cold water had been poured over him. He wanted the ground to swallow him whole, bury him five meters under. He started laughing exaggeratedly and nervously, looking around. “You!” he shouted at the girl, who flinched. “Is this a joke? I’m not in love with her! Lying is bad!” he scolded nervously. The girls, scared, nodded and ran away.
“Is it true…?” Baku asked seriously. Suho quickly turned to him. His face showed pain. “What…? No, Baku, it’s not true,” he quickly replied, grabbing his shoulders. “How could it be?” He was looking for an excuse. He didn’t want Baku to know he really liked her, because that would mean Baku would give up on his love for her.
“Actually…” he started to say, but stopped, closing his eyes tightly and cursing under his breath. When he opened them and looked around, he saw a boy. A miracle! “I’m in love with Sieun!” he shouted. Hearing no response, he looked at those present: Baku, Min Ji, and her friend were all speechless.
“In love with Sieun…” he thought. Maybe that wasn’t the best idea. He turned to look at Sieun, who was watching him with surprise and anger, and quickly walked away.
Suho wondered how loud he had shouted for Sieun to hear him. Now he was embarrassed. He laughed nervously. “Well, I hadn’t told you, Baku… I don’t like Min Ji, okay? I hope you two have a lovely relationship,” he said quickly, bowing slightly.
“Suho—” Baku tried to speak, but Suho was faster and walked away.
Suho fled to the classroom and, with a sigh, dropped into his seat, resting his face on his pink squirrel pillow. He felt overwhelmed. He hadn’t thought clearly and regretted saying he had a partner when he actually liked Min Ji.
“I have a partner… how pathetic!” he told himself, rubbing his face in frustration. Suddenly, he remembered Sieun had heard what he said. He didn’t want him to think badly of him. Suho got up to go find Sieun, but stopped when he saw him come in without even looking at him or saying hello.
Suho let out a breath, incredulous. It reminded him of years ago, when Sieun didn’t even know he existed, but Suho was determined to be his friend because “he had something different.” He felt uncomfortable as he watched Sieun settle in, pulling out some notebooks to study.
Suho cleared his throat. “Did you eat?” he tried to start a conversation, approaching Sieun, who seemed focused on studying. “Why did you say that?” Sieun asked in his soft but raspy voice, giving Suho goosebumps.
“It was a reasonable situation, you wouldn’t understand, brainiac,” Suho justified, sitting in the chair across from him and turning it to face him. Sieun looked at him silently before turning back to his notebook.
“But just to be clear, I don’t have romantic feelings for you. I just didn’t want any misunderstandings,” Suho continued. “I know,” Sieun replied. Suho felt relieved.
“It’s good that you know. I was wondering…” Suho couldn’t finish the sentence because Sieun interrupted. “Why don’t you just date her?” he asked, though the answer was obvious. “Would you date the girl your friend likes?” Suho replied with irony, and Sieun let out a sigh. Suho imitated him, and after a moment of silence, Sieun spoke.
“You’re really quiet. You’re always talking. Is it because of that?” Sieun asked. But before he could continue, Suho interrupted: “Do you want to go out with me?”
Sieun looked at him, surprised. “What?” Suho raised his hands to clarify. “I don’t like you, it’s just to calm the situation and make Baku believe it…” Sieun was going to answer, but Suho was quicker. “Please, Sieun.” He looked into his eyes with a puppy-dog expression, something Sieun hated because he always fell for it.
“Why would I? I gain nothing from this,” he replied in his typical voice and nerdy expression. “You’re always cold to me!” Suho thought.
Suho began to hum. “Think about it. Why not me, your friend for years? I know they bother you. Wouldn’t they stop if they saw you were dating me? You know they don’t dare mess with me, because… well, because I’m me,” he explained with a silly smile. “I promise to defend you. They won’t cause more trouble, I promise!” His smile grew wider, becoming more sincere and sweet.
Sieun felt his stomach turn. He seemed to be considering the proposal. It’s not that he couldn’t face them alone, but he was tired of dealing with them and they distracted him from studying. However, he wondered why Suho chose him instead of someone else.
“Why me?” Sieun asked curiously. Suho reflected and returned the question: “Why not you?”
‘Because, out of all people, my eyes landed only on you.’
Sieun said nothing else and just stared at Suho. “Then… Please, Sieun-ah. Just for three months,” Suho pleaded, putting his hands together.
Sieun was really considering it. He must be crazy. But Suho… he didn’t know if he was doing it out of pity, the offer, or the sincerity reflected in his sweet smile. Sieun didn’t know, but he hoped it was pity.
Suho was really happy. That morning he hadn’t even slept well. After his job, upon arriving at school, he showered and headed to his classroom. He had something important to give Sieun and, after finishing, pushed the desks together and took a short break. He knew he wouldn’t wake up without a thousand alarms.
He had a mission: to pick up Sieun at his apartment. It was 5:40 a.m. and Suho, who rarely woke up at that hour, kept telling himself it was all worth it for Sieun. He didn’t rush on his motorcycle, since he knew Sieun left at 6:20 to go to school.
When he arrived, he quickly got off the motorcycle and almost ran up the stairs, excited. He knocked on the door several times, waiting for Sieun to open. From inside, he heard a muffled voice cursing.
When Sieun opened the door, Suho smiled widely. “Hi, boyfriend!” he exclaimed, full of energy. Sieun looked at him in confusion, poking his head out to make sure no one was in the hallway. He wondered what was wrong with Suho, who had spoken so loudly they probably heard him all the way in Busan.
“What are you doing here?” Sieun asked, still puzzled. “Can I come in?” Suho asked cheerfully, and without waiting for a response, walked in.
“Wahhh,” he exclaimed as he stretched and walked to Sieun’s living room. “I thought that, since we’re a couple now, it’d be more believable if we arrived at school together,” he explained as he settled onto the couch.
“Why are you here? You’re scary, you look like a kidnapper,” Sieun replied, eyeing Suho’s smile suspiciously. “Wait a moment,” he said as he grabbed his backpack and pulled out a folder. “What’s this?” Sieun asked, intrigued.
“An official fake dating contract,” Suho replied proudly, as if he’d invented something groundbreaking. “Everything’s in there: rules, clauses, conditions, even symbolic fines. Professionalism, you know!” he added excitedly.
“It has a few simple rules,” Suho continued, watching Sieun, who said nothing. At first, he looked at him like he was crazy, but then returned to his usual serious expression, with a slight pout on his lips.
Suho quickly showed him the contract and laid it on the table in front of them. “Amazing that you’re already being picky with rules,” Sieun thought, incredulous. Without objection, Suho kept talking.
“First, since we’re a couple, we need to be a little affectionate. I know you don’t like physical contact, but it’ll only be for a moment. I promise to warn you before I touch you, okay?”
“You’re seriously sick,” Sieun said, looking at him with disdain. “A little, but functional,” Suho replied with a smile and a thumbs up.
“Another rule is that we must have public dates at least once a week. To keep appearances, we have to go out as a couple with friends and post it on social media, so get ready to make an account,” he explained while counting on his fingers.
“No flirting with others during the contract. In private, we can act like normal friends, but we must have a photo of us as the wallpaper on our phones, just in case someone checks. We also must attend all school events together, even if you don’t want to, bookworm. And, very important: we can’t fall in love with each other. Totally forbidden,” Suho concluded in a serious tone.
“Trust me, I’d never fall in love with you,” Sieun replied, taking the folder. Suho let out an ironic laugh, offended. “I’ll take that as if you didn’t just insult me,” he said, dramatizing his pain.
“Let’s continue. If someone asks where we confessed our feelings, our stories must match. If one says ‘at the café near school’ and the other says ‘at the train station,’ we’ll look like emotional scammers,” Suho added, hoping Sieun would recognize his genius.
“Who confesses on a train?” Sieun asked, convinced it wasn’t a romantic place.
Sieun then read the title on the first page: “OFFICIAL FAKE DATING CONTRACT: between Ahn Suho (The Desperate One) and Yeon Sieun (The Forced One). Duration: 3 months.” Sieun raised an eyebrow at this.
“Read it. Clause 11—you’re gonna like it. It’s creative,” Suho said proudly.
Sieun sighed and went straight to clause 11, frowning as he read.
Clause 11: “Official Dating Version”
Both parties must memorize a story that answers the following questions:
1. Since when have we been dating? — Official date: Three weeks ago (the same day Suho choked on a cookie in the cafeteria, if they ask).
2. Who made the first move? — Suho, obviously. Emotional justification: “I couldn’t keep hiding my feelings… or choking on cookies thinking about him.”
3. Where was the first date? — Location: The park by the Han River.
4. What made you realize you were in love? — Suho: “When Sieun insulted me and gave me the death glare four times in one minute, and I still wanted to hug him.” Sieun: “When Suho gave me the last nugget without asking for anything in return.”
5. Nickname: “Bobo” (said sweetly, according to Suho).
Penalty for failure:
Mandatory treat of the other’s favorite food. If Sieun messes up, he has to buy ox bone soup for Suho.
If Suho messes up, he’ll cook a delicious meal for Sieun, like the chef he claims to be.
Sieun slowly closed the folder, processing the situation.
“You wrote this by yourself?”
“Yes,” Suho replied, puffing out his chest. “I barely slept to get it done. I’m pretty proud of the cookie part, to be honest.”
“Who chokes on a cookie and turns it into a romantic moment?” Sieun asked, like it was the dumbest thing in the world.
“A desperate man with imagination!” Suho responded, offended.
Sieun looked at him seriously, holding the contract in his hands.
“This is ridiculous.”
“I know,” Suho admitted in a whisper, then softly added, “But it’s my only way to not lose one of my best friends… and you.”
With his usual puppy-dog expression—his go-to strategy to get Sieun to give in, even though Sieun already had back in the classroom.
Sieun looked at him for a few seconds before lowering his gaze to the paper he held. Suho had already signed:
Signature of the one who messed up: Ahn Suho.
Signature of the one who saved him from falling into the pit:
With a tired sigh, Sieun signed.
They were in the school cafeteria. While the others arrived at 8:00 a.m., Sieun preferred to get there two hours early. However, today he would only have one hour to review, since Suho had interrupted his routine—like he was doing now.
Both of them were rehearsing in the cafeteria, a perfect place due to the lack of people. Suho and Sieun sat facing each other.
“Let’s do a simulation,” Suho proposed, flipping through the folder he’d brought with a serious look, like he was in court. “I’ll be your curious classmate, and you… are the perfect boyfriend.”
Sieun let out a small laugh. Suho loved hearing his laugh and seeing his smile—they were rare, but special.
“Wouldn’t it be more realistic if I just played the guy who ignores you?” he suggested.
“Sieun,” Suho warned in a serious tone. “This is a mission. Focus.”
Suho’s serious demeanor made Sieun chuckle; he’d never seen him try this hard.
“Alright, go ahead,” Sieun replied.
Suho nodded, composed himself, and changed his expression, pretending to be surprised.
“Wow! You two are dating? I can’t believe it! Tell me everything! Since when?”
“Three weeks ago,” Sieun answered effortlessly.
“Who made the first move?”
“You,” he said, looking away. “And it wasn’t that impressive, to be honest.”
Suho raised an eyebrow. “That’s not in the contract,” he objected. “It’s supposed to be a touching confession full of noble feelings.”
“It was, but you were choking on a cookie, so…” Sieun replied, making Suho laugh before getting back into character.
“And how was your first date?”
“It was at the park by the Han River. You bought ice cream for yourself and gummy candy for me. You complained that the pistachio tasted like soap,” Sieun recited with concentration.
“Because it does!” Suho replied, breaking character. “Seriously, who even likes pistachio?”
Sieun rolled his eyes, a tiny smile slipping out—almost unnoticed.
“Let’s continue,” Suho said, straightening up. “When did you realize you were in love with me?”
Sieun hesitated, then looked down. “When you left the last nugget for me… without saying anything.”
Suho fell silent, surprised that Sieun had actually used the line he wrote as a joke. He looked at him; Sieun kept his eyes down, feigning disinterest, though his fingers fiddled with the edge of a napkin.
“And you?” Sieun asked, still not looking up. “When did you realize?”
Suho leaned his elbows on the table and smiled slowly.
“When I knew I could annoy you five days in a row… and you still wanted to stay close.”
Sieun finally looked at him.
“It’s not that I wanted to. It’s just that you had no filter and I felt bad for you. I tried to stay away, but you stuck to me like gum, so I had a bit of compassion.”
“Sure, sure,” Suho muttered, amused. “And what do you call me in private?”
“‘Bobo,’ but with hate,” Sieun replied seriously.
“That’s not in the contract,” Suho said, laughing. “That’s exactly how I signed it.”
Suho laughed softly, then his expression softened and his voice lowered a bit.
“You know… if someone saw us right now… they’d think we were actually dating.”