Chapter Text
Is this really happening?
Juliana still couldn’t believe it, despite knowing about it for almost a year now.
Today was the day she’d be moving over 2,000 miles across the country to the infamous city of Los Angeles, California, for work.
She wasn’t one of those aspiring actors or deluded influencers who assumed that by simply moving to LA, opportunity would find her. No, she was going in with an actual job and solidified plan. Well, that was only partially true.
Juliana did have an actual job secured and with a rather prestigious company, but it was a 2-year program. And while she knew about it nearly a year in advance and received a generous lump sum for her cross-country move, she still felt scatterbrained over the entire thing, as she did with most things in her life. It was hard to plan for it.
She’d never let it show though, that’s something she kept to herself.
In moments of self reflection, she’d not-so-proudly declare herself as the hot mess express, but if you knew her in any other aspect of life like work and school, you’d say the opposite.
She doesn’t exactly believe in astrology, but she felt prideful when her friends labeled her as the epitome of a true capricorn. Ambitious, practical, independent, reliable and all the other traits that made her feel worthy of success.
Looking at it as an outsider, it was all true. The way she sped through college in under three years while working several internships and industry-relevant full-time jobs, it didn’t take much to realize that she was a hard worker.
And while perfectionism was both her greatest strength and weakness, it did its job in helping Juliana portray herself in such a light.
Her work and resume, as great as it was, was not entirely reflective of her as a person. Don’t get her wrong, she’s not some evil serial killer or anything like that. She just wasn’t as well put together.
In the hours away from work, she’s misplacing everything, throwing belongings around to the point where she can barely see the floor of her room, forgoing homemade food for the convenience of fast food, scrolling endlessly through whatever social media finds her. Routine never found her easily.
It’s embarrassing when she thinks about it, but she doesn’t quite have it in her to pull herself out of it. She’d been in the funk for a while, longer than she hasn’t, but she’s learned to live with it.
However fortunate or unfortunate that is.
But while she doesn’t have a solid plan in place for the move to California, there is one thing she resolved to do as soon as she's out of Florida: get her shit together.
In theory, it shouldn’t be too difficult. All Juliana really needed to do was let her professional work ethic bleed into her personal life, right? She’s already gotten so far, working her tail off since her first job at the age of 16, how much harder could this be?
Being one of the five of thousands of candidates to be selected for the two year program was a feat on its own. Adding some structure and routine in her personal life should be simple enough.
It was a good enough distraction for the time being. She’d rather spend her five hour flight meticulously planning how she would finally get her life together than focus on the fact that she’d be so far from home and all alone in the big state of California.
Her fears weren’t assuaged by the fact that she had already signed a lease for an apartment she never actually toured. The reviews weren’t enticing, but the photos and rent were and that would have to do. Living in a sketchy area isn’t something Juliana hasn’t done before, but doing it alone is.
She didn’t have family in many other states to begin with, but she had none on the west coast. She never imagined having to start from scratch like this but despite her fears, Juliana thought it would be worth it.
Not only would the job be a huge boost to her resume, but she technically wasn’t tied down beyond the 2 year contract. If she decides she hates it, she can fly right back home. It was an opportunity she knew she had to seize now after just turning 21, being single, and having no other responsibilities to hold her back in Florida.
So regardless of how scared she really was about the entire thing, it's something she kept to herself. She’d be an idiot to turn down the opportunity. Plus, a new city should be exciting. It couldn’t be that bad, could it?
Wrong. Juliana had no idea what she was in for. She thought her biggest struggle would be living alone and while that was part of the issue, it wasn’t the one that frustrated her the most so far.
It was the damn furniture. Funny, right? It felt silly to feel so defeated over furniture but she now considered home shopping her greatest enemy. She wanted to stay budget friendly and brick and mortar furniture stores were the opposite, so she took to online shopping.
It quickly became her biggest enemy, simply due to the unfathomable number of options. She doesn’t think she’s ever been so indecisive in her life.
There was a point where she was truly willing to give up and hire someone to make all the interior design choices for her. Not only were there thousands of different styles of furniture, but the different colors stumped her the most. Do grey chairs match with a tan table? Is a white couch a bad idea? How bad would it be if everything were pink instead?
She spent hours on end searching and searching, nearly pulling her hair out. But it just made it that much more satisfying when she was finally able to pick something and order it.
She willed herself to ignore the fact that she’d have to assemble everything on her own, nevermind struggle to bring it inside her apartment. Thank God for delivery.
Juliana actually didn’t mind putting furniture together at least when it was a one-off instance.
But her struggle began with one of the very first pieces of furniture she assembled, which was rather discouraging. It was a bookshelf that was over a foot taller than herself. She was legitimately considering hiring someone to assemble the rest until she realized she’d have to invite a random stranger into her home.
Juliana wasn’t an overtly paranoid girl, but she most certainly was a stupid one. It would be dangerous to let anyone know that a young girl like herself lives alone, even if it’s overheard somewhere in public.
So she shot that down. But again, the more intense her frustration, the sweeter her ‘victory’ felt upon completing the task.
It builds character. her mom would say whenever she tried voicing a complaint over the phone, which only enraged her further. Was it so wrong to want her mother to feel sorry for her, even a little bit?
The same mother also told her to meet as many guys as possible to help in moments like this, while also discouraging her from getting into any relationships. What a woman.
Regardless, it was done, and Juliana had a little over a week to relax before the job actually started.
She promised herself at least a few days of sightseeing, but not before she enacted her plan to ‘get her shit together’.
There were a lot of changes to be made to her life but she was determined to see them through. The most significant change would be going to the gym. It was something she’d never been able to commit to in the past for one reason or the other, so she could only hope it would stick this time.
No matter how many times she’s repeated the cycle though, Juliana could never wrap her mind around the fact that there are people who genuinely enjoyed going to the gym and working out. She saw it as a burden more than anything and maybe that’s why she could never follow through with it, but that’s really what it was for her.
She’d tried to leave that mindset in the parking lot as she walked towards the entrance of a rather massive gym. The size eased a bit of her discomfort. The bigger the gym, the more people and the more people, the easier it would be to blend in. That was the most she could hope for.
It’s always been easy to blend in when she’s on the treadmill. It was her go to. And the only machine she’d go to.
It was embarrassing to admit but it was one of the only machines she knew how to use. That and the elliptical, except she wasn’t sure if she actually knew what to do on it. All she really remembers is putting both feet in one foothold as a kid and using her arms to move the thing.
Maybe that was part of her problem with the gym, only using one machine. The thought of trying something new was anxiety inducing though. Juliana much preferred comfort and familiarity over novelty in many aspects of her life. No matter what it was, she always felt an excessive amount of trepidation when it came to trying something new.
And she didn’t care how confusing and intimidating the non-cardio equipment looked. The people in the gym looked more intimidating. And her pride didn’t make asking someone about it any easier. So she didn’t.
Juliana was a smart girl. She could totally figure one out on her own.
Which brought her to the strange metal contraption towards the back of the gym. The area was thankfully less crowded. Less people to laugh when this becomes a failed attempt at trying something new.
She approached a machine that was a little shorter than herself. It looked like a medieval torture device more than anything, but there was several others that looked the same and one currently in use, so she assumed it was safe enough.
It had a small seat without a backrest and looked suited for children rather than adults. There was an overhead bar handle thing that almost looked like a pulley system, equipt with cables that looked to be attached to black blocks, which upon further inspection she realized were the weights.
She tilted her head, frowning in confusion. There seemed to be some cylindrical padding block a little above the seat and with a quick glance over to the guy two spots over, it looked like it was meant to keep your legs in place, but for her that was far from the truth.
She wasn’t sure if it was adjustable, but her legs didn’t even come close to the padding. It didn’t seem like an important piece, so Juliana didn’t bother with it.
Hoping she wasn’t too obvious, she watched out of the corner of her eye to glance at the man as he pulled the bar pulley thing to his chest in one smooth motion and pushed it right back up.
That’s it?
Her overthinking felt a bit foolish now. Feeling determined, she planted her feet firmly and straightened her posture. She reached up for the bar but soon realized she could hardly reach. Juliana simply shrugged before standing on her tiptoes to grab hold.
She smiled to herself when she finally got a good grip and gave it an experimental tug. Her cheeks warmed when the bar didn’t budge. She quickly looked around to see if anyone saw her lame first attempt and sighed in relief when she saw the guy was already walking towards another machine.
She glanced at the weight stack thing, squinting at the pin that was lodged around the halfway point.
Thirty pounds? That doesn’t sound too bad. she thought to herself, completely unaware that thirty pounds on this machine was nothing like the thirty pounds she was thinking.
(She vividly remembers the fifteen pound bags of flour she’d have to lift at her first job at a local joint. It was always a celebration when Juliana managed to pick up more than one at once.)
Juliana leaned back and tried again, putting her entire body weight into the pull this time. The bar moved this time, but in a more jerky motion than what she’d seen previously. It felt all wrong and the sudden movement sent her elbows outwards.
She wobbled precariously in the seat, her thighs lifting as her legs failed to anchor her in place. Her heart skipped a beat as she realized she truly had no idea what she was doing and no idea what to do next. She tightened her grip on the bar as she felt it moving back up, in a hope to steady it, but the force of the bar snapping up yanked it straight out of her hands.
Before she could even react or see what happened, she felt the bar slam down into her forehead.
The impact sent her toppling backward off the seat on the hard gym floor. Pain blossomed immediately, both in her head and her tailbone.
Her hand instinctively shot up to her face as the pain radiated from her forehead to her nose and then the rest of her face and she felt something damp and warm.
“Shit,” she muttered to herself, blinking as tears sprang to her eyes. That was most definitely blood on her fingers.
Her mind moved slowly as she stayed on the floor, not able to think of her next move. Somewhere in the back of her mind she desperately hoped no one was around to witness such an embarrassing moment.
But life wouldn’t have it that way. She faintly heard the sound of weights dropping and chatter coming to a stop as a few heads turned her way. Mortified, Juliana scrambled in an attempt to sit up, but a shadow loomed over her before she could even fully process what had just happened.
“You alright?” a deep voice asked. She looked up to find a man crouching in front of her, concern written across his face. His light brown eyes scanned over her quickly, landing on the red smear across her forehead. “Whoa-hold on. You’re bleeding.”
Juliana opened her mouth to protest whatever he was going to say next, but the sharp sting above her eyebrow made her wince instead.
“Here, let me help,” he said, already pulling a clean towel from the bench behind him.
She tried waving him off as her cheeks flushed, mortification flooding her body once again, “I’m fine, really, it’s not that bad-”
“You just smacked in the face by that bar. And hard,” he interrupted unapologetically and with a hint of amusement softening his tone. “I’ve seen worse, trust me, but you’re definitely not fine.”
“Seen worse? Here at the gym?” she questioned, anxiety seeping into her tone, “God, I knew this was a bad idea.”
He chuckled, “No no, I’m a firefighter. This is actually nothing compared to what I’ve seen on the job. Lucky you, that means I’ll be able to patch you up in no time,” he smiled kindly as he put pressure on the towel on her forehead.
Juliana’s anxiety was momentarily overridden by her curiosity, “A firefighter? Really?” she asked, tone a mix of awe and disbelief. She internally cursed herself for how it sounded.
“Yep. And a former army medic.” he confirmed with a small nod, “So trust me, you’re in good hands.”
Her cheeks stayed warm, and not just from the embarrassment from her accident. She wasn’t used to anyone stepping in to help her, especially not someone who seemed as calm, cool, and collected as this guy.
“I’m not sure if that makes me feel better or worse,” she muttered, letting out a nervous laugh.
He smiled again, “I’d say better. You’ve got a pretty solid bump forming, but it doesn’t look too serious. How are you feeling? Dizzy, nauseous, anything like that?”
“No I’m okay,” she rushed to say despite the throbbing in her forehead. She wasn’t going to make a bigger scene than she already had, “Just embarrassed, mostly.”
“Well, you’re not the first person to have an accident with this machine in particular,” he assured, “It’s a tricky one if you’re not used to it.”
Her gaze darted to the lat pulldown machine as though it would mock her. “Yeah, I’ve never used it before. Clearly.”
“Let me guess,” he said, tone light and teasing, ”New year, new you?”
She groaned at that, “Not exactly. It’s more like ‘new city, new gym, same idiot that’s always hated the gym.’”
If she were in a better frame of mind, she’d be mentally kicking herself for even revealing that she’s new to the city. Maybe she was just too paranoid. The guy was kind enough to patch her up, what’s the harm really?
“New city, huh?” his expression softened, “You’re not from around here?”
“Just moved here from Florida,” she admitted, fidgeting with her fingers in her lap, “It’s been…something. An adjustment for sure.”
“I bet,” he said kindly, the tone making her chest ache just a little, “LA’s a big change.
I’m from Texas myself, but I couldn’t imagine a cross-country move. Can’t be easy, I bet.”
Juliana just shrugged half-heartedly, hoping to hide how overwhelmed she really felt. “Yeah, well, no one forced me to come here, so I guess I can’t complain too much.”
Which was true, no one forced her, but that fact didn’t make her want to complain any less.
He studied her for a moment before saying, “Still, it’s okay to admit when things are tough. Doesn’t make you any less strong.”
Juliana didn’t know how to respond to that, so she stayed silent. She didn’t know what about it threw her off, the sincerity in his voice or how hard the words hit, like he knew she needed to hear it.
“Tell you what,” he said, breaking the silence, “How about I show you how to use the machine properly? I promise it’s not as scary as it looks once you get the hang of it.”
Her eyes widened, “You don’t have to do that.”
He stood up and replied, “I know, but I want to,” he offered her a hand, “Besides, I can’t let you leave, hating the gym and thinking it’s some death trap.”
She hesitated for a moment before reaching out and taking his hand. His grip was firm, yet gentle as he helped her to her feet.
“By the way, I’m Eddie,” he said, flashing a reassuring smile.
“Juliana,” she replied, giving a shy smile of her own.
“Well, Juliana,” Eddie said, stepping back toward the lat pulldown machine, “let’s make sure this thing doesn’t get the better of you again.”
For the first time that day and since coming to LA, Juliana felt a flicker of hope. Maybe LA wouldn’t be so bad.
Juliana reflected on the encounter as she headed home. It left her feeling a myriad of things, including pain from the small bump above her eyebrow. Her stomach still filled with shame thinking about it, but she could also remember the underlying relief she felt when Eddie stepped in.
He was extremely kind to her and surprisingly patient as he helped her with the machine. (Not that she’d ever be using it again.) It was refreshing to interact with someone like that.
Sue her for having prejudged everyone in LA to be vain snobs who cared about no one but themselves. To be fair though, Eddie did say he was from Texas. Still, it was as shocking as it was comforting.
Up until that moment, she hadn’t interacted with anyone here for more than a minute. Even though the reason for interaction was less than ideal, it gave her hope for her future in LA.
Especially since conversation came so easily. Juliana doesn’t remember the last time she felt so at ease talking to a complete stranger. It was always her biggest fear when meeting new people, that conversation would just lapse into an awkward silence and they’d run out of things to talk about, but that didn’t seem to be the case at all with Eddie.
She didn’t consider herself socially awkward by any means, but it was always the initial interaction that was her biggest hurdle. At least it’s out of the way with Eddie.
She found it equally cool and horrifying that he was a firefighter as he shared a few stories of recent calls. It was much cooler than her joining the millions of unsatisfied employees of corporate America, which she didn’t reveal to him.
Oddly enough, she was thankful for the injury and the headache that came with it. Otherwise, she’d be oversharing into oblivion like an absolute dweeb. Because it's what she does best.
As much as she’d like to be a cool and mysterious girl, she can’t help herself sometimes. She just really can’t stand silence, awkward or not, even with her own family. She’s always filling it with something, whether it be a random fact or a song.
Juliana’s chipper mood was momentarily soured when she entered her apartment. Yes, everything was assembled and it’s rightful place, for the most part, but the floor was still littered with cardboard boxes, plastic wrap, and styrofoam.
Later. she thought to herself as she dropped her gym bag by the door and kicked off her sneakers.
Now that she was home by herself, there wasn’t much else to linger on aside from the pain above her brow. And Eddie again. She couldn’t help it.
As she slumped onto the couch and stared at the ceiling, she let the events of the day replay in her mind. Eddie’s laugh echoed in her memory, warm and genuine. The kind that made you feel a little less insignificant in this world. Like you weren’t alone.
It’s a shame she didn’t get his number though. Not that she’d ever have the guts to ask. She didn’t want to seem overeager and she didn’t want him to get the idea that she wanted something else from him.
Don’t get her wrong, the man was definitely easy on the eyes, but she most definitely wasn’t looking for a relationship, not when she’s barely got two feet on the ground. No, her focus was making friends and while it felt a bit presumptuous to call Eddie one, she felt it was a good start.
At least she had a good reason to go to the gym now. She could only hope that she saw him again.