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It’s been a while since he and Kai had trained one-on-one, but he hadn’t expected their spar to last for hours. Kai wasn’t keen on losing their little match and neither was he, but eventually, they collapsed on the porch steps and called it a day. The sun was shining especially bright today, and he could feel his stomach growl in protest, he could only hope the others would return from their little trip to the market soon.
Before leaving, Geo had brought out some sliced fruit for them and Cole thanks the First Spinjitzu Master for him, because there’s no way he would have had the energy to drag himself into the kitchen now. He was sore and exhausted and judging by the way Kai’s legs trembled as he sat down, he could tell that he felt the same.
"Man, I love Geo. He’s an angel, I’m telling you."
"Yeah, I don’t know what I would do without him."
Cole shakes his head as the truth of these words settles in. He really doesn’t know.
Years ago, he thought he had everything figured out, but he could have never predicted the Merge, no one could.
He had lost his family, had to go on for five years without them and if he hadn’t met Geo back then, he probably would have lost it.
Cole thinks of Geo’s bright eyes when he had first learned that Cole was Lilly’s son. Golden stars so mesmerizing, he had to remind himself multiple times to look away. His shy smile the first time Cole held his hand. The softened features of his face as he fell asleep on Cole’s shoulder. He had looked so cute and peaceful that Cole couldn’t help but kiss the top of his head.
A low chuckle escapes him as all these memories come back to him. Has it really been five years? Four? Three? When did their relationship shift from mutual respect to friendship to romance?
"I guess there’s one good thing that came from the Merge.“
Cole loves him so much.
He has told him so many times, and he’ll never get tired of Geo saying it back.
He loves his family, the one he has been with for over a decade, and his new one, the one gifted to him during the darkest time of his life.
Now, he couldn’t be happier.
Kai hums and looks at the ground.
"I guess so.“
A comfortable silence settles over them.
Cole closes his eyes for a moment, and when he opens them again, Kai is still looking at the ground. He obviously wants to say something, if him biting his bottom lip is anything to go by. Cole is about to ask him what’s on his mind when the silence is finally broken.
"I’m sorry if this sounds insensitive, I don’t mean it that way, it’s just", he shrugs.
"You never seemed to care much about romantic stuff. At least, that’s what I thought, so... how did you even realize your feelings for Geo?"
Kai turns his head to look at Cole now, his lips twisted in an awkward smile, unsure if his question was okay to ask, as if Cole would just get up and leave or take offense. There’s genuine curiosity in his expression and Cole has to smile warmly, to reassure him, to show him that he isn’t upset.Looking at Kai’s face, seeing his awkward and uncertain smile softening, fills him with warmth.
It feels nostalgic in a way, but also very different at the same time. Where there had been excitement and a weird tugging in his guts, now lies fondness and worn-in affection.
Nowadays he does seem a bit more anxious, not that it obvious, on the contrary. It had taken Cole weeks to notice something was off, and when he asked Kai about it, he just shrugged it off and blamed it on the lack of sleep. Which wasn’t too far fetched, if he's being honest. Lloyd hasn’t noticed anything at all, but really, maybe Kai just pretends a bit harder around him.
Now that Cole thinks about it, he’s probably right.
"Don’t worry, man. You can ask me anything.“
He pauses for a moment, unsure on how to continue.
Fuck it.
He might as well just spill it all. It doesn’t matter anyway.
„Well, yeah. I always knew I was different, but I couldn’t exactly put my finger on why. At first I thought I was a late bloomer or something, but turns out I was just never into girls, you know?"
Cole shrugs his shoulder as he says it, like they’re having a casual conversation about nothing and not about something he would have been terrified to admit ages ago.
"Remember when Jay and Nya broke up? Before that, Jay and I fought over her. I don’t even know why. I guess I just liked the attention she gave me, you know? I never really experienced romantic attention before that and…it was nice. Even if I wasn’t actually into her."
He has to laugh at the memory. It feels like yesterday, how he almost ruined his oldest friendship over a girl he didn’t even like. FSM, they were all so stupid back then. He can’t really blame Nya though, she was so young and confused, just like him.
He must have been reminiscing for way longer than he thought, because suddenly Kai’s voice pulls him back to the present.
„So, like…how did you realize you’re into guys? I need to know everything about your embarrassing crushes. it’s only fair, since you know about mine."
He’s back to normal again and Cole is relieved that they can be comfortable with each other. And in a way, he’s glad he gets to tell him everything, because now he doesn’t have to live alone with the knowledge that at some point, in the past, he wanted them to be something more.
Kai grins at him, a teasing glint in his eyes. Cole rolls his eyes but smiles anyway.
"Okay, sure. But brace yourself, because this is super, mega embarrassing,“ he looks away again.
"I might have had crushes here and there, but I just didn’t know at the time. I just thought those guys were like, super cool. And then at some point, I just knew, because there was no way in hell I was into women.“
He chuckles softly.
"And then Nya and Jay were doing everything together, Zane was always with P.I.X.A.L., and Lloyd was going through his own stuff. And well, that left you and me."
He looks over at Kai again, who’s intently listening to every word he’s saying. It makes Cole shake his head in disbelief, it’s so genuine.
"We started to spend so much time together and…well, your looks really didn’t help, if I'm being honest."
He knows it will most likely go to Kai’s head, and he definitely doesn’t need that, he’s already too full of himself. But it’s the truth and it’s not like Kai is unaware of how handsome he is.
What he doesn’t expect is for Kai to completely freeze up and stare at him, like he can’t believe what Cole just confessed to him, or like he must have misunderstood. Cole just gives him a lazy smile, as if to say that it is what it is, it happened, it’s in the past, it’s the truth.
"You liked me?"
He sounds confused, but not judgemental or weirded out, like he genuinely had no idea. Cole lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he’s been holding. It’s out. The words are out and Kai doesn’t look at him any differently. He’s the same old Kai, he’ll still be his friend. Not that Cole had any doubts in the first place.
He nods.
Kai tounges the inside of his cheek.
"You never told me."
"Well, yeah. I didn’t want you to know. The only reason I’m telling you now is because it doesn’t matter anymore."
And isn’t it strange? How easy it is? To be so open about something he used to pretend didn’t really matter, a part of himself he tried to hide, just because he was scared of rejection, of ruining a friendship. And now he has an amazing boyfriend who he can be himself with, who loves him back. It’s awesome.
Cole used to think romance was overrated, but now he totally gets it.
Kai still looks like he’s in shock but it’s starting to wear off. He leans forward and shakes his head, a chuckle escapes his lips. It’s so soft that Cole almost doesn’t catch it.
"Wow," he says and looks back at Cole. A hint of red colors his cheeks. It makes him look so much younger and healthier. And makes his eyes glow like warm honey.
"I had no idea. I don’t know what to say. I’m honored? And just so you know, this is totally boosting my ego. Means I can even pull the baddest baddies."
Cole bursts out laughing and slaps Kai on the back before he lies down to look up at the sky. Kai’s really something else, he should have known that this would be his reaction.
Kai does the same and a comfortable silence settles over them again. For a moment, it feels like they are teenagers again, relaxing under the sun after Wu put them trough hell with his insane training schedule.
He thinks he should probably try to ask Kai about his time alone post-Merge again, but not now. Maybe tomorrow. Right now he just wants to enjoy the sun on his skin, the presence of his friend, wait for the others to come home.
And then he wants to kiss Geo and hold him close, whisper sweet nothings into his ear.
Kai’s smile fades slightly as he sighs.
"I think“, he doesn’t say anything else for a while and Cole thinks he might have fallen asleep, with his eyes still following the white clouds in the sky.
"I probably would have gone out with you."
Cole’s smile dims slightly. The soft ache in his chest makes this moment feel bittersweet. He doesn’t know if they would have worked out. It wouldn’t have changed the fact that he had fallen in love with someone else. Or would it? He doesn’t know, and there is no way he could ever know. And that’s okay.
„Maybe in another life.“