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It was the first Mother’s Day since Kelvin and Keefe were married, and so far, marriage had done wonders for the two of them. They finally felt secure and confident in their identities and their love for each other. Keefe was warming up to feeling welcomed in the Gemstone clan, and Kelvin had a new sense of pride and equity among his siblings, having brought another well loved spouse into their tight family circle.
Everyone certainly still has their more… adventurous, moments. When it comes to the Gemstones, it’s pretty difficult to stay out of trouble. But these days, there is a sense of togetherness that has made being a Gemstone feel all the more special.
“Baby, I hope you’re ready cuz I might be makin’ us late for Mother’s Day church! I can’t find my gosh darn church glasses…” Kelvin half yelled, half whined from the master bedroom.
Keefe’s head whipped to the direction of Kelvin’s voice. He had learned that Kelvin tends to appreciate his space when getting ready for big church, so he can properly center himself without distraction. So Keefe has been quietly playing Tiny Tower on his phone at the kitchen island, fully dressed and ready to go, slightly concerned by the amount of rummaging he could hear from upstairs in their bedroom.
“It would be fine if I couldn’t find them on other occasions, but I put on these rings that are too distracting if I don’t have the glasses, and it would take at least six minutes to decide on a whole new ring set that doesn’t clash with what Jesse is wearing, that would just make me look inconsiderate of color crowding-” Kelvin’s rambling stilled as he felt a hand splay on his upper back, and saw his glasses come into view, held very stiffly before his face as if in some ritualistic presentation.
“I found your church glasses, husband. I hope you didn’t fret for too long.” Keefe’s melodic voice felt like a blanket fresh from the dryer being draped down Kelvin’s back.
Kelvin took a deep, dramatic, breath as he put the glasses on his face, then backed into his husband’s chest and allowed steady arms to wrap around him. Both sets of eyes found the mirror they were standing in front of, and the sight they made together was really quite nice.
Kelvin took a moment to notice what Keefe had chosen to wear; a dark green button up shirt buttoned all the way to his throat, so that a silver chain with about seven different crosses hanging from it could lay under the collar, paired with a well fitted black blazer, black slacks, and black leather boots. The sleeves of his blazer each had a large silver feather embroidered near the wrist. It was less eye-catching than his typical ensembles, but still very Keefe.
“I'm sorry sweetheart, I hope I didn’t worry you with my frettin’.” Kelvin sighed, watching himself take one of Keefe’s hands in his own. Their wedding rings glowed as they neared each other, as they were designed to do. “I guess I’m not sure what’s got my nerves in knot-em-ups. Usually, big church isn’t even a big deal.”
Keefe rested his chin on Kelvin’s shoulder, looking strikingly similar to a labradoodle with his big honest brown eyes and textured dirty blonde hair. “Well, it is Mother’s Day big church. It probably feels a bit different from regular big church. Though, I don’t presume to know what the different occasions of big church tend to feel like. I just know I get a similar burst of holy joy in my heart every Sunday that I watch you, my husband, on stage, giving Jesus to the people so freely, like you’re spraying them with glory and pure white light. It makes me feel so proud that you chose to hit me with your pure white glory spray.” Keefe has a reverent and faraway look in his eyes as he shares this that sends another wave of warmth through Kelvin.
“Thank you Keefe. I appreciate you sayin’ that.” Kelvin says with a small, tight, but genuine smile. He can see the kindness and devotion in his husband’s face, and watches Keefe press a very intentional kiss, full of unspoken comfort, on the side of his head.
“Welp,” Kelvin claps his palms together, breaking the moment and extracting himself from Keefe’s arms. “It’s churchin’ time. Let’s get this show on the road! You look so nice today my man, have I gotten to tell you that?” Kelvin rakes his eyes down Keefe’s form before hooking his pinky with Keefe’s and lifting their arms together, leading Keefe to do a very slow, slightly crouched spin underneath. Kelvin popped a kiss on top of Keefe’s hand, just above his wedding band, before leading downstairs and out to the car with urgency.
“Thank you husband, I believe I look nice as well. Amber and BJ took me shopping on one of our spouse afternoons. I told them I wanted to expand my wardrobe to better compliment your evolving tastes, so we can have a unified look before the congregation. I’m sure there’s a lot of pressure on you, being Top Christ Following Man™️ and all. I never want to be a hindrance to your public image.” Keefe monologued as they climbed into the car, and pulled out of the drive to make their way off the compound toward church. “Amber even said that with my broad shoulders, slightly tapered waist, and long legs, I could pull off some dresses better than she could… if I wanted to.”
Keefe chanced a glance at Kelvin for any sign of reaction. “I don’t really believe that, I think Amber is one of God’s most beautiful creatures. BJ seemed to agree with her though. Who knows. But I have decided to stick with a more neutral aesthetic for the purposes of public events like church. Something that makes me feel nice, but doesn’t distract from your heavenly glow. I find myself drawn to the men’s collections of vintage designers. Though I am still very attached to the more expressive fashions that I grew up with, I find a need for more appropriate attire. As a married man. Husband to one of the pastors. I don’t take that honor lightly.”
Keefe notices the tight grip Kelvin has on the wheel, and the effort he is putting into nodding along without actually taking in everything that Keefe is saying.
“You look very nice today, Kelvin. I understand what you mean about your rings going with your church glasses. Even though I’m not sure why, I understand that your church glasses are very important to you in general. I-I don’t imagine you would want to get into all of that in the car right now, before seeing your family and getting onstage for Mother’s Day big church.”
Keefe lets a silence fall for the first time in several minutes, looking out the window at the fields passing by. “If you did want to, that would be… fine. Welcome even. I’m always here to listen-”
“I know that Keefe.” Kelvin interjected. “I-, thank you. For always wantin’ to listen, sweetheart.” Kelvin drummed his fingers restlessly against the wheel. “I don’t even know what you’re talkin’ about, with my church glasses. They’re just glasses! Not even real ones, they’re just for fashion stylin’ purposes, I don’t know what- you know what. Just- it’s nothing. It’s nothing! I’m just nerved up a bit more than usual. That’s all.” he finished with a huff.
Once they rolled to a stoplight, Kelvin squinted his eyes shut and laid his hand on Keefe’s thigh. He felt Keefe’s hand cover his and give a gentle squeeze.
“Thank you. I’m sorry. Thank you.” Kelvin sighed, feeling awkward after his outburst. They let the moment breathe.
“Mm- the uh, the light is green, Kelvin.” Keefe said, startling Kelvin’s eyes open.
“So it is, darlin’.” Kelvin clapped his hand down on Keefe’s thigh as he put his foot to the pedal. “Why don’t you tell me more about your spouses afternoon with Amber and BJ, Keefe.”
1997
“Mama, you look very pretty.” Kelvin stated with certainty, watching as his Mama flitted about the master bathroom getting ready for church.
Aimee-Leigh stopped in her tracks and looked to her sweet son, sitting on the counter with his legs crossed. He was such a good boy, so much gentler than Jesse and Judy were when they were seven. Well, he definitely knew how to dish back to his older siblings when they tormented him. But when it was just the two of them, Kelvin clung to her side and chatted with her about anything that came to his head. She liked to call him her little duck, because he reminded her of the ducks that would follow her home from the lake growing up in Freeman’s Gap.
“You are such a sweetheart. Thank you baby.” Aimee-Leigh cooed, grabbing her son’s chin and planting a kiss on his forehead. She chuckled at the bright red mark left by her lipstick, and rubbed at it with her thumb.
Kelvin closed his eyes as her long, well manicured nails scratched along his scalp, and he could hear her gold bracelets jangle together next to his ear.
“Mama,” Kelvin questioned, opening his eyes to look up into Aimee-Leigh’s above him, “why can’t I wear glasses like yours?”
Aimee-Leigh leaned over to grab her hairspray before answering with an amused smile. “Well baby, I need glasses because my old eyes don’t work as well as they used to. I wear these things out of necessity. Your eyes work just fine, so you don’t need them.” She said as she fluffed up sections of her curls and sprayed them to stay. “Do you want glasses, sweetheart?” Aimee-Leigh asked, pushing her own pair up the bridge of her nose with a single pointer finger.
Kelvin hummed with consideration at this. He picked at his jeans and pressed his lips together, wondering if he should feel embarrassed by his answer. “I just think they look nice. Do I really need to have broken eyes to wear them?” he asked carefully.
Aimee-Leigh felt a fondness bloom in her chest. “Well, if you’re passionate about it, maybe not. Maybe, we could find you a special pair that are just for accessory, that you can wear on occasions that you just feel like wearin’ them.” she responded thoughtfully.
She opened a drawer in the vanity that revealed six sets of glasses, each in its own case until Aimee-Leigh decided to wear them, and deftly selected the pair that she called her “church glasses” to swap them for her previous pair.
There have been several pairs of church glasses throughout Kelvin’s life that had been interchanged when a pair needed to be replaced, but the pair that was designated as “church glasses” were always reserved specially to be worn by Aimee-Leigh for Sunday morning services.
Kelvin perked up with an idea, “Maybe I can have my own church glasses!”
“Maybe, baby.” Aimee-Leigh laughed as she gave a last touch-up to her blush. “Alright my little duck. Let’s go make sure Jesse Judy and your Daddy are ready for church.”
“Ok Mama.” Kelvin agreed as he hopped off the countertop. “But I expect further discussion on this topic.” He said with a seriousness that made Aimee-Leigh stifle laughter.
“It’s a deal, little man.” she agreed. She crouched down to his level sitting back on her heels, and looked into his eyes as she grabbed his hand for a firm shake.
Keefe took a hearty bite out of his steak and kept his eyes slyly trained on Kelvin next to him as he chewed. Or, at least he thought it was sly. He was getting some glances from the table as the gears in his head ground on the way Kelvin was acting this morning.
As far as he could observe in the moment, Kelvin was more quiet than usual and avoided purposeful eye contact with anyone at the table. Church had gone off without a hitch, there was a really beautiful section honouring mothers, in which the congregation was showered with flowers from above.
Keefe had carefully watched Kelvin throughout service, and didn’t see anything out of the norm in his mannerisms onstage. Kelvin had years of practice turning off whatever was on his mind before stepping out in front of a crowd.
Keefe wasn’t clueless, he knew Mother’s day is always hard for Kelvin. He wasn’t usually this keyed up though. He watched as Kelvin took his glasses off and folded them in his hands, looking down at them with stormy eyes.
“Keefe honey?” Amber’s voice from across the table floated into his range of awareness and startled him. “Apologies Gemstone family, I was lost in the labyrinth of thought it seems.” Keefe offered with clearly false humor.
“That’s ok Keefe. We were just discussin’ how fun our last spouses afternoon was.” Amber smiled, training her very striking but kind eyes on his own.
BJ leaned forward to speak from the other side of Judy. “It was really great getting to know you some more, Keefe. I hope we can do it again sometime. I’ve been thinking about getting new earlobe jewelry and wanted some brotherly input.”
Keefe nodded to both Amber and BJ. “That sounds delightful, BJ. I was telling Kelvin all about our last outing this morning. I look forward to the next time we can spend together bonding over the unique honor of being adjacent to the Gemstone family via the holy bonds of marriage.”
Amber had raised her eyebrows at the phrasing that Keefe had shared all of what their afternoon had entailed with his husband. She made fleeting eye contact with BJ before she said “Keefe, you’ve gotta stop thinking of yourself as outside the Gemstone family. You’re just as much a Gemstone as BJ and I! You even share the name.” Amber looked to her husband on her right, and leaned into his arm that was stretched across the back of her chair.
Jesse cleared his throat roughly. “I agree with you baby, Keefe is just as much a Gemstone as any of us. I’d honestly rank him above BJ since he had enough sack to take the family name.” He teased looking pointedly at BJ, who looked to have a very typical amount of exasperation.
Judy, in extremely Judy fashion, licked a stripe up her middle finger and reached across the table to stick it in Jesse’s water glass. “Judy, I’d appreciate you keeping all body parts that have been inside someone else’s asshole away from my beverage.” Jesse snapped.
“Though I will say I appreciate the sentimentalisationism, Keefe. Ya know, acknowledging that it is a very special thing to be a Gemstone. We don’t let in just any fool off the street.” Jesse stated, winking at Amber and squeezing her to his side.
Judy chimed in, “You know, BJ didn’t exactly have the option to take the Gemstone name. He has an illustrious as shit career as an optometrist, and his clients would get all kinds of fucked up if he changed his name. They’d be all like, who the fuck is Dr. Gemstone? Isn’t that some old fart that runs that cool ass church with a fuckin’ hot, talented daughter? I thought my eye dude was Dr. BJ Barnes. A young guy with a tight lil’ man bod, and a bicurious twinkle in his eye.”
“He’s not even a fuckin’ doctor!” Jesse laughed, triggering more laughter and teasing side comments to echo around the whole table.
Eli rolled his eyes fondly at the words of his children. All of his children. He was very glad at this moment that they had invited him back to visit for the Mother’s Day service, an interruption to his retirement travels that he had been cautiously nervous about. He didn’t want Lori to be alone on the first Mother’s Day since her son died, and while it was definitely an emotional day, she seemed to be enjoying herself with this rowdy crew. Eli valued his peace greatly these days, but this moment with his family before him and Lori at his side was worth negotiating some of that peace.
“I’d like to say something if I may.” Eli spoke over the many side conversations that had sprouted. He commanded attention easily, and took in the many eyes that trained on him.
“Your Mama would’ve loved this. She would’ve just loved all of you bein’ here like this. Breaking bread together after church, bein’ little assholes to each other and lovin’ on each other. And I wanna say I am so thankful to you, Amber, BJ, and Keefe. For lovin’ my kids and keepin’ their heads attached to their bodies. God knows I was never very successful at that.” Keefe felt Kelvin’s hand grab his own.
“The greatest dream that your Mama and I ever had was that our children would each find someone that loves them as much as we did. And we prayed every day for those sorry sons-of-bitches, because the good Lord knows it ain’t always easy to love a Gemstone.” Chuckles sounded across the table as Eli threw a wink to Lori.
After the table resettled, Eli turned his eyes to Keefe and Kelvin. “I just wish so badly that she could’ve met you, Keefe.” Keefe was visibly startled at this sudden singling out. “She loved you Amber, and she got to know BJ a bit before she passed on. But she would’ve just adored you, Keefe. With that big bleedin’ heart of hers that I could never quite catch up to. She understood better than I ever could that Kelvin needed to find someone real special in this world. And she would’ve been over the moon to know that he did.”
A hush hummed over the table as this speech sat with everyone. Lori rubbed Eli’s arm with bittersweet comfort after he opened his heart to Aimee-Leigh’s memory. Amber dabbed away tears with her napkin as Jesse nodded to Eli and held her tight. BJ had red eyes full of unshed tears, and Judy stood from her chair and ran to hug her Daddy.
Keefe was in a state of shock and awe at Eli’s very kind confession. He heard the chair next to him scrape along the floor as Kelvin stood and beelined for the staircase.
“Kel? Kelvin!” Keefe shouted after him, as he got up to watch his path leading to the parking lot. “I’m sorry other Gemstones, I gotta, um, I think he’s-”
“It’s okay, son. Go make sure your husband is okay. He seemed very distressed today, as I’m sure you noticed.” Eli interrupted, gesturing in the direction his youngest had stormed off in. “Thank you, Dr. Gemstone. I very much appreciate your words.” Keefe responded, giving an odd amalgamation of a bow and a curtsy before following his husband out to the parking lot.
Keefe scanned the lot for his husband, and quickly found him sat on the grassy curb next to their car, curled in on himself and resting his head on his knees. He looked small like this. This is a side of Kelvin that is rarely seen by anyone other than Keefe these days.
“Kel…” Keefe prodded softly as he approached Kelvin’s tense form. Kelvin chanced a peek at his husband before tucking his head back down.
Keefe took the absence of being told to “buzz off” as an invitation to stay. He sat in the grass next to Kelvin, legs crossed and back straight, taking in the midday sun that was shining down on them. He was careful not to touch Kelvin without being explicitly asked in moments like these. Several quiet moments passed as Keefe watched Kelvin’s ribcage expand and retract with deep breaths.
Slowly, Kelvin’s body started to uncoil from exhaustion. Keefe waited patiently for his tight limbs to relax.
“Wanna come over here?” Keefe softly suggested, lifting his arm to offer a soft place to land.
Kelvin scooched over into his husband’s space, and tucked himself into his side under his arm. ‘Under his wing’ Kelvin thought, looking at the sleeve wrapped around him. A soft breeze blew around the two of them, taking the edge off of the sunlight.
“You did a great job in church today. Everyone was enraptured by your glory spray.” Keefe offered gently. “I think, I think maybe your Mama would’ve been very proud of you.” He continued, well aware he was walking into touchy territory.
Kelvin wiped his face with his sleeve to counteract the tears that had begun to silently fall again without his permission.
“Thanks Keefe.” Kelvin sniffed. “I don’t know why my body is doin’ this to me.” He mumbled miserably.
“Why your body is physically expressing your emotions?” Keefe questioned genuinely.
“Ya.” Kelvin responded, his voice very wet. “Usually I keep that shiz on lock.”
“I have a couple of theories. I’ve been ruminating on them since this morning.” Keefe responded with great seriousness.
“What’s happening to me?” Kelvin whimpered as he laid his head into his husband’s shoulder.
“Well, grief is a very complex process as I understand it. I think you may be having a particularly emotionally laborious day due to many triggers and outside factors you may not even realize.” Keefe sympathised very factually. “As your husband, and more importantly someone who loves you, it pains me greatly to see you feeling this way. I’ve done a great deal of research seeking out the best ways to protect you, and help you through it. If you ever felt inclined to seek professional advice on this topic, I would greatly encourage that. But until then, I am equipped with a wealth of knowledge.”
Kelvin grunted in response, wading through everything Keefe had just dropped on him. How long had Keefe been worried about him? Had he seen this day coming? Did he think Kelvin was an emotional landmine ready to explode at the thought of his dead mommy? Kelvin loved thinking about his Mama. He thought he was on the other side of all of the really hard feelings.
Kelvin suddenly cleared his throat and straightened up to shake off all the yucky feelings as he saw his family begin to trickle out of the entrance to Jason’s Steakhouse. Keefe gave a polite wave as everyone dispersed to their cars.
Judy did a truly horrendous job at pretending not to be looking in their direction, and hiding behind a tree to peek further before being scolded by BJ.
Jesse in similar fashion lingered for far too long outside his car pretending to point out birds to no one, until Gideon physically pushed him into the vehicle.
“I don’t want you to think of me as fragile.” Kelvin blurted into the air. “I don’t want you to spend all your time worryin’ about my emotions and, and thinkin’ I’m broken.”
“I don’t think you’re broken, husband. I think you are the strongest, most glorious, most holy man I have ever met.” Keefe urged, laying his hand on Kelvin’s back to rub grounding circles.
“I think I wanna go home now.” Kelvin breathed.
“That we can definitely do.” Keefe nodded with enthusiasm. “We can do an easy, comfort focused afternoon.” Keefe scrambled to his feet, relieved to have a list of tangible actions forming in his head that he can do to help.
The couple made their way gently to the car, Keefe doing his best to make sure Kelvin feels safe and comfortable in his vulnerable state.
Once Keefe took the wheel, he felt the honor and pressure of being the one responsible for this precious man’s well being bearing down on him. Their journey home was mostly a quiet one, save for Keefe humming along to the radio on occasion, trying to sing lyrics he had no familiarity with.
Kelvin turned the shower off, feeling physically refreshed, and wrapped himself in a fluffy lime green robe after toweling himself dry. Typically, Kelvin would have no problem exiting the bathroom in front of his husband with only a towel wrapped around his hips, but he was definitely still feeling vulnerable, and appreciated the calm he felt from being wrapped up more completely.
Kelvin sucked in and blew out a large breath standing before the bathroom door, willing himself to be available to Keefe’s efforts to comfort him. Knowing his husband, he was on the other side of that door setting up anything he could possibly think of that would make Kelvin feel safe and happy, which he really did appreciate, as much as it could be overwhelming at times.
Keefe was caught off guard by the sound of the bathroom door opening, and turned quickly to see Kelvin standing very stiffly in the doorway, looking engulfed in his robe.
Keefe made sweeping presentational gestures to the areas of their bedroom that he had covered in his “Kelvin comfort tools.” There was a nest of fluffy blankets situated on the bed, a plethora of Kelvin’s favorite snacks in bowls on the side table, Real Housewives of Salt Lake City cued up on the TV, and a pair of matching jammies that Kelvin had never seen before laid over the foot of the bed. They were a soft yellow, patterned with orange koi fish.
“I wanted to surprise you with a new bedtime set, I was saving them for our next family movie night, but I thought it would be nice to be matchy matchy again.” Keefe smiled, clearly very proud of his work.
Kelvin gave a genuinely thankful smile in return, reaching his hand out for Keefe to grab so he could pull him close. He pressed a kiss to Keefe’s mouth, and wrapped his fuzzy arms over Keefe’s shoulders.
“Thank you Keefey.” Kelvin tipped his forehead into Keefe’s, and held tight to him, feeling anchored.
“You are welcome, husband. Anything I can do to help you, I will do. Anything you want or need, I am so on it.” Keefe stated, looking directly into Kelvin’s eyes with an extreme intensity as their foreheads stayed pressed together.
“You do such a good job of takin’ care of me. But I think all I need now is for you to be here with me.” Kelvin responded, letting his arms slide down to grab Keefe’s hands.
“If that is all that you truly desire, your wish is my command.” Keefe agreed with complete seriousness, along with some magical genie flourishes with his arms, never letting Kelvin’s hands go.
Kelvin released himself from Keefe, and made his way to the bed. “Would you like me to assist you in your jammie dressing?” Keefe asked, busying himself with straightening out his blanket nest creation.
“I’m ok sweetheart, I got it.” Kelvin found a corner of their bedroom to face as he got dressed. Again, he would typically seek the assistance of his husband, something that had evolved from a genuine need while he was injured, to a covert flirting tactic, to a sexy little part of their daily routine. But Kelvin wasn’t feeling particularly sexy at this time.
By the time Kelvin turned around, Keefe was finishing pulling his own pajama shirt on. “Kel, why don’t you get comfortable in bed, and I’ll join you in just a moment.” Keefe suggested, immediately collecting his and Kelvin’s discarded clothing from the floor.
Kelvin nodded, slowly made his way into the pile of fuzzy fabrics, and shifted into a cozy corner, ensuring enough room for Keefe to squeeze in next to him.
“Keefe, could-” was as far as Kelvin got before Keefe read his mind, and turned down the thermostat several degrees to compensate for the amount of cozy they were about to be bundled in.
Keefe added what looked like the last touch of his project, lighting a banana nut bread and hazelnut scented candle that Judy had gifted them called “Bofa Deez Nuts,” and promptly dove into the blanket mass to shuffle next to Kelvin.
Keefe pressed play on Housewives, and leaned back to give Kelvin space to lay on his chest.
Time passed easily, and as the sun went down outside the windows, the episodes of reality TV came and went, and chatter and laughter passed between the two of them. Kelvin felt supported and loved in a way he hadn’t felt since his Mama was around. The thought didn’t ache as much as it did earlier that day, but it was enough of a poke in the heart to make him thankful that he found that sort of love again.
Sometimes it was hard for Kelvin to understand the depth of Keefe’s devotion and thankfulness to him, insisting that Kelvin solely had brought him to salvation and that he was intensely dedicated to giving that gift back to him in any way he could. But he understood at this moment just how transformative this kind of love can be. Kelvin has been saved his entire life, but being held by Keefe is the closest he’s ever felt to holy salvation.
“You got quiet there, husband. Care to share what you are thinking about?” Keefe asked, knowing that Kelvin had not been paying attention to the television for a few minutes.
Kelvin’s eyes flicked to his church glasses sitting on top of the dresser.
“I’m… just thinkin’ about how much I love you.” Kelvin said, shifting slightly to face Keefe. Keefe pressed a kiss to Kelvin’s temple before grabbing the remote and pausing the TV on a very unflattering closeup of Heather Gay, sensing that Kelvin had more to say.
“I’m thinkin’ about Mama too. Surprise surprise I guess, I’m sure you picked that one up with context clues.” Kelvin muttered, looking down at his fidgeting fingers, and slumping further down against Keefe.
“I am particularly skilled with context clues, so I did “pick up” on that part I must confess.” Keefe replied, utilizing finger quotations.
“You said earlier that you thought I was havin’ an ‘emotionally laborious’ day, or somethin’ like that? I think that makes sense. I’m just tryin’ to figure out why. Why the sadness feels so big.” Kelvin frowned.
“Maybe you don’t have to know why.” Keefe offered, running his hand up and down Kelvin’s arm thoughtfully.
“I guess, I agree with what Daddy said at lunch. I agree with it big time. It makes me so happy to know I get to have you, and love you, and be loved by you. And I can’t know for sure, but I think my Mama really would have liked you. You love me in the same way that she loved me, and it’s so crazy for me to think that because she was just the best. It’s like God gave you to me because He knew I needed that love again. Or maybe she sent you. I dunno. It just makes my heart hurt knowin’ that she never got to see us and how cool we are. She, she didn’t get to be at our wedding, or bug me about when I was gonna propose to you, or tease me about my first boyfriend, or any of that. And it makes me feel sad.” Kelvin unloaded the thoughts that had been weighing on his heart, including the ones he wasn’t aware of until they left his mouth.
“That does make a lot of sense Kelvin. It makes me real happy to know that you feel that loved.” A shadow of anxiety passed over Keefe’s face.
“There is a part of all of this that I am realizing, just now, I never had the chance to share with you, well I realised it earlier at lunch after your Daddy said what he said and all but the timing didn’t feel appropriate…” Keefe trailed off, screwing his face in a way that told Kelvin he was thinking real hard about how to say what he needed to say.
“I uh, it’s a really funny story actually, and I just can’t believe I never told you. But I actually did get to meet your Mama.”
Kelvin lurched upright in shock, twisting his body to fully face Keefe’s. “You what???”
2015
Keefe was wandering up and down the aisles of Harris Teeter with his red basket trying to plan his exit. He had two bags of frozen chicken tenders, two frozen pizzas, a jar of peanut butter, and about a dozen apples. He felt silly, walking in circles, his eyes flitting to the exit doors and the tall, muscular man patrolling them every few seconds.
Keefe made yet another loop back to the entrance of the store, and stopped cold as he saw the automatic doors slide open. The grocery store radio was playing the song that Keefe recognized as “Uptown Funk” as a cart rolled in, followed by a woman with a dazzling smile that drew all eyes in her direction.
Keefe’s breath caught in his throat when he saw her face. It was one he knew well, it would be a feat to live in this town your whole life and not recognize the matriarch of the Gemstone family.
Keefe was a bit dazed and starstruck by her presence, rooted to the spot as he thought about all the times his mother had played Aimee-Leigh Gemstone’s music in their little family car, or on the radio in the kitchenette.
As soon as the Aimee-Leigh Gemstone left his line of sight, he regained enough physical self control to start breathing again. Admittedly a bit distracted, Keefe made an effort to continue his looping about the aisles of the store as the pizzas and tenders in his basket defrosted.
Keefe’s nerves wound themselves tighter the longer he spent walking, not sure if he had been spotted yet, not knowing if he should just abandon ship at this point.
“Excuse me?” Keefe just about jumped out of his skin hearing a voice behind him. “Excuse me young man?” He turned around to see her, Aimee-Leigh Gemstone, looking directly at and speaking to him.
“Y-yes ma’am?” Keefe somehow got out as he felt himself shuffle in her direction.
“What is your name, young man?” Aimee-Leigh asked him with a very solid expression.
Keefe hesitated, wondering why on earth this woman wanted to know his name. “My name is Keefe Chambers, Mrs. Aimee-Leigh Gemstone ma’am.”
Aimee-Leigh seemed taken aback to know he knew who she was. “Alright, I got Chambers. Now, spell that first name for me sweetheart?”
“Yes ma’am, K-e-e-f-e, ma’am. Keefe.” He forced out, almost dropping his grocery basket.
“I see.” Aimee-Leigh confirmed with an amused smile, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose with her pointer finger.
“Well, Keefe, would you tell me why I have seen you wandering like a lost lamb up and down these aisles, adding nothing to that basket of yours, eyeing down that security guard for the last ten minutes?” She raised an eyebrow at him in a way that said she has an idea why.
Keefe’s face turned red and hot as he felt the weight of this woman’s stare, waiting for him to respond. “I- it’s just um…” he tried to get out, truly at a loss for what to say at this moment.
“How about we make a deal, Keefe Chambers. If you help me load my groceries into my car, I will pay for everything in that little basket.” Aimee-Leigh offered with a knowing smile.
Keefe’s eyes widened, “M-ma’am I will absolutely help you with your groceries, but you really don’t have to-“ “So it’s settled then.” Aimee-Leigh interrupted, grabbing the handle of his basket and placing the items in her own cart.
Aimee-Leigh pushed her cart past Keefe and straight for the checkout. As Keefe followed behind her like a puppy with his tail between his legs, he could hear the store radio switch to a song by Taylor Swift.
The checkout process was mostly painless as Aimee-Leigh made small talk with the cashier, who only fleetingly eyed him. Keefe was struck with the thought that perhaps this wasn’t the first time Aimee-Leigh had done something like this.
Keefe hummed under his breath to the song playing. He hadn’t heard the song before, but the second time the chorus came around it was catching in his head. “The rain came pouring down when I was drownin’ that’s when I could finally breathe…”
As they made their way out of the checkout and toward the exit, Keefe crouched down beside the cart, seemingly hiding behind it from the security guard. Aimee-Leigh gave him a puzzled look, but didn’t blow his cover. Said security guard was staring at his phone anyway, and gave nothing more than a nod as they passed by.
Keefe stayed crouched behind the cart all the way to Aimee-Leigh’s car. Once they got there, he popped up and blew out a sigh of relief.
“What was all-“ “Did you think-“ Aimee-Leigh and Keefe blurted simultaneously. “You go ahead, sweetheart.” Aimee-Leigh conceded.
“Did you think I was trying to steal?” Keefe asked.
“Well yes, it sure as heck looked like it! Until you decided to go all Mission Impossible on me.” Aimee-Leigh laughed out loud. “Were you not?”
Keefe shook his head, “No ma’am Mrs. Gemstone, I was planning on paying for my items, I make enough to get by with my employment at the Department of Motor Vehicles.”
Aimee-Leigh gave his appearance another once over, considering this narrative development. “I was tryin’ to figure out how to leave unnoticed by that, that man by the exit.”
“And why would that be?” Aimee-Leigh asked as they both started loading her groceries into her car.
Keefe stayed silent a moment, trying to formulate his answer.
“Well come on son, it’s the least you can do to satisfy my curiosity after I bought your groceries for you!” She teased, nudging his side with her elbow.
“That security guard is named Derrick, and we used to, until recently, um, consort together…” Keefe shared slowly, redness spreading across his cheeks and to his ears.
Aimee-Leigh’s eyebrows flew up in an understanding expression. “Oh! Oh, is that, is he your ex?” Aimee-Leigh whispered conspiratorially, glancing back at the store over her shoulder.
“Something like that. I guess you could say so. I didn’t know he started working here, and I really didn’t want him seein’ me. He’s not very nice to me.” Keefe sighed.
“Oh darlin’, believe me when I say I get it. You seem to be a sweet boy, you deserve the kind of man that deserves you!” Aimee-Leigh encouraged.
Keefe was very surprised by her positive response. He had not expected his confession to go over so well.
Aimee-Leigh suddenly had an inspired look in her eye. “Now, given that you know who I am, am I correct to assume you know about my family’s church?”
“Yes ma’am I do.” Keefe nodded.
“Well Keefe, I’d like very much to see your face in one of them seats some Sunday.” Aimee-Leigh pulled a flyer from her purse for the Gemstone Salvation Center and dropped it into the bag of Keefe’s grocery items before handing the bag to him. “I won’t keep you longer, but I think it could do you some good.” She winked at him.
“Thank you Mrs. Gemstone. I’ll think about it, maybe.” Keefe offered a weak smile as she turned to her car.
Keefe stood there stunned for a good minute watching the car pull away, weakly returning the gesture when Aimee-Leigh enthusiastically waved at him through the window.
Not fully believing what had just happened to him, Keefe trudged slowly to his own car. Aimee-Leigh Gemstone had just told him the words that he had never had the courage to consider.
‘You deserve the kind of man that deserves you!’ is what she had said. Keefe had never thought of himself as deserving of anything before. Everything in his life had either been bought, fought for, or in a desperate moment, stolen. Keefe didn’t deserve a certain type of treatment. He took what he could get.
Keefe looked down at his bag that had started to drip condensation down onto his shoe. He knew he needed to get home before his food was ruined. He took another look back at the store. That Taylor Swift song was stuck in his head.
Kelvin’s eyes were wide and shiny, and a smile was wavering on his face. Keefe was unbelievably nervous for Kelvin’s response to the story. He didn’t seem upset at all while he was telling it, even laughing at some of the things Keefe could remember Aimee-Leigh telling him. But Kelvin’s face now was hard to read.
“Keefe, why didn’t you ever tell me that happened?” Kelvin nearly whispered.
Keefe let the words spill out. “It never felt like the right time to bring it up. I always thought, always knew, that I would tell you, I was just never sure. When we met, it was so soon after your Mama passed, and I was feeling so guilty that I waited until after she was gone to be saved. She tried, she was kind to me and gave me an opportunity. I went home and I threw away that flyer, and I went to Club Sinister that night. Then, when you saved me, everything changed and I was so so thankful, and I didn’t want to risk any of it.”
Kelvin’s eyebrows were drawn together. In thought, in pity, in understanding, in anger, Keefe couldn’t tell.
“You know I don’t like talking about my life before you very much, because it was shameful. Your Mama thought I was stealing, and she bought me food to stop me from doing it. Then I told her about my ex boyfriend and she didn’t judge me, and I felt so safe with her. Then I turned away from the path she drew me to.” At this point, Keefe’s eyes were welling up.
Kelvin reached for Keefe’s face to firmly direct their eyes to meet. “Baby it’s ok, it’s ok that you didn’t take that first opportunity from my Mama. Sometimes it takes time, or a couple of tries. You don’t need to feel guilty.” Keefe nodded, holding on to Kelvin’s words.
“I’m still stuck on the part where you got to talk to Mama. Like, a full convo where she was kind to you and knew you were a gay and everythin’!” Kelvin shifted to a kneel, holding Keefe’s face between his hands as tears ran down both of their faces. “Mama knew your name…” He giggled, his voice full of emotion and wonder.
Kelvin kissed Keefe sweetly, and rubbed his tears away with his thumbs.
“I’m so sorry for keeping this from you Kelvin, you deserved to know.” Keefe’s wet voice shuddered out of him.
“It was a kinda bonkers thing to do, but I forgive you.” Kelvin smiled gently in response.
Keefe’s smile in return was bittersweet. “I promise to never keep anything from you again husband. Keeping that in all this time made my soul itchy.” He shared earnestly.
The two of them laughed weakly at the absurdity of the whole situation, as Kelvin wiped his own tears away with the heels of his hands. With a great sigh, Kelvin collapsed back into Keefe’s side, wrapping his arms around his husband’s middle.
“I definitely wanna talk about this more later, but right now, I’m real tired.” Kelvin yawned.
Keefe nodded, pulling Kelvin into his warmth. Having finally divulged this story, he felt immensely lighter. “Of course Kel. I’m rather tired as well. It’s been a long day.”
Keefe clapped his hands twice, cueing the lights in their bedroom to turn off.
“Oh darn.” Keefe sighed as he unwrapped himself from Kelvin’s arms, and quick as he could made his way across the room to blow out the “Bofa Deez Nuts” candle and back into bed.
“Goodnight and sleep tight husband Kelvin.” He stage whispered.
Keefe felt Kelvin’s smile on his shoulder. “Goodnight husband Keefe.” Kelvin stage whispered back.