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It was ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. And the worst of it was that he couldn't even complain. Even though he played a major part in all that weirdness. But no, it had only taken his members a matter of minutes to decide and to plot against him. If they had happened to be in the middle of promotions, the whole scenario would have been very different. But as they weren't and the situation was endearingly cute, Yoongi had been the one chosen to take one for the team.
Sorry, this isn't making much sense, is it? Allow me to explain.
It all started with a clumsy knock on the front door. Yoongi, who happened to be returning from the bathroom still half-asleep, was the one who opened it. On the other side, a miniature of a person.
"Hyung!" The boy screamed, latching himself on Yoongi's leg, giggling happily.
Yoongi could only shriek.
In the end, not only did the rest of the members wake up, but the kid's giggles turned into a deafening cry.
Seokjin was the first to appear, motherly instincts kicking in and, despite the initial surprise, picked the boy up, humming soothingly to him until he was calmer. The other four members appeared one by one, in all different states of grogginess and confusion. They all gathered in the living room: an urgent group meeting was required.
Seokjin, still with the kid in his arms, sucking his thumb and with puffy red eyes weirdly fixed on Yoongi, was the first to speak.
"Yoongi, would you mind explaining what's going on?"
"I don't know!" He raised his arms in protest. "One moment I was taking a piss and in the other there was this things," he pointed at the boy, completely oblivious to what was going on, "scared the shit out of me! Popped out of nowhere!"
"Perhaps he's lost?" Namjoon suggested.
"Except we're not really in the middle of a busy street, hyung." Taehyung added. "And we are on a second floor of a building in a relatively quiet street. I vote he's an alien."
"Come on, now," Seokjin interrupted what could possibly become a mess of voices talking at the same time. "First we need to know who he is and then make a plan." He turned to the boy, "Hello, I'm Seokjin. What's your name?"
The boy took his thumb out of his mouth and timidly looked around the room. "I'm Jimin."
"Jimin! What a pretty name!" The boy giggled. "And how old are you, Jiminie?"
The boy showed five little chubby fingers. "These much!"
"Wow, you're so grown up!" The boy rejoiced with the compliment. "Do you know where your mommy is, Jimin?"
The boy shook his head. Great, Yoongi thought.
"And why did you knock on our door?"
"I wanted to see ice-cream hyung!"
Every member got a massive question mark on top of their heads. Ice-cream hyung? Who calls someone that?
"And who's ice-cream hyung, Jimin? Hyung doesn't know."
Jimin opened his eyes widely, as if outraged by the confession. He spoke very matter of factly.
"Silly hyung, ice-cream hyung is that hyung, duh!"
He pointed his chubby little finger. And he pointed it straight to Yoongi.
Taehyung and Jungkook were the first to break into loud cackles, doubling over and getting tears on the corners of their eyes. Infected by their laughter, Jimin’s high pitched one soon joined them and it only took a few seconds for both Hoseok and Namjoon to start giggling as well.
“Oh. My. God” Taehyung panted, supporting himself on Jungkook’s shoulder. “Ice-cream hyung! The great Min Suga is the ice-cream hyung!”
Even Seokjin chuckled at that, quickly biting his lip to hide his smile when Yoongi sent him a nasty look.
Five grown men and a miniature laughed at his expense. And it wasn’t even that funny, if Yoongi was honest about it. Not funny at all.
“Please tell us, Jimin,” Hoseok asked, wiping his tears, “why is he ice-cream hyung?”
“Because of his hair, of course! It’s green like my favourite ice-cream!”
This, of course, only caused a new eruption of laughter.
After five minutes of going at it, Yoongi – who didn’t find the situation amusing at all – stopped them.
“Shouldn’t we, I don’t know, try to find how this menace ended here of all places?”
This ceased the laughter and it was why a few moments later his members decided against his will that he was the one to take care of Jimin while they searched for his parents.
“But, hyung” he whined at Seokjin, “you know how terrible I am with children! What if I accidentally kill him?”
Seokjin tsked. “Nonsense. Jiminie adores you, don’t you, Jiminie?” he called to the boy entertained by the cartoon’s channel.
“Yes! Ice-cream hyung is my favourite hyung!”
“See?” Seokjin turned to Yoongi. “There’s nothing to fear, Yoongi. Just keep him entertained for a couple of hours. His mother mustn’t be that far away. There’s food in the fridge and I’ll have my phone with me at all times. You can do this, right?”
“I won’t be held responsible if something happens,” was Yoongi’s sulky answer.
Seokjin sighed. “Fair enough. I’ll be going now. Bye, Jiminie!”
“Bye bye Jin-hyung!”
And then they were gone and it was just Yoongi and Jimin.
Yoongi sat next to him, still completely immersed in his cartoons, and fumbled with his phone for lack of better things to do. His plans for the day had been to work on some melodies and beats and tackling the final touches of one song that had been rendering him sleepless for some nights. With Jimin in the picture it had all gone done the drain.
He was so distracted with his game of Piano Tiles – yes, Jungkook had managed to get him addicted to it – that when someone tugged his sleeve, his heart jumped a bit.
“Hyung,” Jimin said, worrying his bottom lip.
“What?”
“I need to pee.”
“First door on the right,” Yoongi said, returning to his phone. “Can’t mistake it.”
“Hyung!” The boy whined, “You need to come with me!”
What the –
“What? Don’t you know how to go the bathroom alone?”
“Mom helps me.”
“But I’m not your mom. So, good riddance.”
In retrospect, Yoongi should’ve just shut his big mouth and remembered he was still dealing with a six-years-old child. Had Seokjin been there, he’d have received a nasty look and a lecture. But he was alone and the kid was tearing up again, sniffling and bottom lip trembling.
“Oh no! No! Don’t cry! Please!” Yoongi hurried, picking Jimin’s hand and fleeing towards the bathroom. He didn’t deal with kids, much less crying kids. He’d rather cross hell with his bare fit than deal with kids. He was not built for taking care of children, God damn it! “Hyung’s sorry! Let’s go to the bathroom! Hyung will help!”
Turned out Jimin only needed help with his jeans’ button and then for washing his hands. Talk about panicking.
Still, when Jimin looked up with shiny big eyes saying he was hungry, Yoongi couldn’t help but do the weirdest sandwich ever for fear of new tears. He also complied when Jimin offered a bite, even though he pretty much hated tuna mayo.
As long as the kid didn’t cry, he was fine.
Which was why – probably as a redemption of all his sins – he had to start imagining the living room’s floor as lava and jump around like a chimpanzee on the furniture. Which was very much fun to the kid, but terribly taxing for Yoongi’s old bones. He was not exactly ten anymore nor did he feed himself on energy and stamina pills like the younger members. But, as he was afraid, he endured it.
Plus, the kid was having fun. (Not that Yoongi cared anyway.)
“Hyung! Hyung! I’m gonna catch you!” Jimin shrilled, laughing as he jumped on the sofa’s cushion.
Yoongi was on the armchair opposite it. “Will you? I’m quite fast, you know?”
“Hyung!” Jimin repeated, high pitched and happy, quickly diving forward to the armchair.
Without time to react, Yoongi lost the little balance he had and thudded against the floor. Not missing the opportunity, Jimin launched himself to land right on top of Yoongi’s stomach.
“Hyung, you lost! You stepped on lava!”
“What about you, you punk?” he retorted. “Aren’t you stepping on lava as well?”
“No! I’m on an island! The island isn’t lava, hyung, didn’t you know?”
“You little rascal!! So now I’m an island?” Yoongi guffawed, head locking Jimin and ruffling his hair. The boy just laughed in pure delight. “I’m an island now? How smart of you!”
Jimin laughed and laughed, squeaking for air. His bubbliness never stopped.
“Are we interrupting something?” Seokjin asked, blowing their bubble. When Yoongi looked up, he found a knowing smile and a raised eyebrow. He didn’t like it at all.
“Hyung! You’re back!” Jimin quickly got out of Yoongi and ran to Seokjin.
“I am! And guess who I brought with me? Your mom!”
“Mommy!” The boy exclaimed as a young woman of no more than thirty came out of Seokjin’s shadow. Her hair was as black as her son’s and his eyes had definitely been inherited from her.
“Park Jimin! Do you know how worried I was? What have I told you about running off?” Jimin slumped his shoulders and looked down to his feet. “What if it hadn’t been these hyungs finding you?”
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.
The woman sighed loudly, smiling softly at her son. “Come here, come give mommy a hug.”
Jimin ran up to her, tiny arms held out and lacing her neck as soon as he was picked up from the floor. He buried his face on the crook of her shoulder and she kissed his head. She then turned to Yoongi.
“Forgive my manner. I’m Kim Sumin and I was visiting my mother in law to get Jimin acquainted with the space. He’s to come here every afternoon after school starts.”
“Mother-in-law?”
“Jung Junji-ssi of the bakery downstairs. She’s Jimin’s grandmother.” Seokjin clarified.
“Yes, yes” Sumin nodded. “When she told him that she was neighbours with the boys he likes to listen and dance to, he must’ve got the idea to come up and see for himself. I’m very sorry for the trouble we’ve caused.”
“Uh… It was not a problem…” Yoongi said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “Jimin… uh… he was no problem.”
The woman smiled and bowed slightly, still with Jimin in her arms. “Time to say goodbye, Minnie. Say goodbye to the hyungs.”
“Bye bye Seokjin-hyung. Bye bye Yoongi-hyung,” Jimin waved.
“Bye bye Jiminie!” Seokjin waved while Yoongi just said a “bye kid.”
When the door closed and it was just Yoongi and Seokjin again (who knew where the other four were), the older smiled.
“So… Who said he didn’t know how to deal with kids?”
“Nope! Not here!” Yoongi quickly said, stomping to his room.
“You seemed to be having fun, Yoongi-ya!” Seokjin called, amused tone in his voice.
“Shut it!” was Yoongi’s only answer before closing himself in his room.
Seokjin only laughed.
Three weeks after the Jimin incident, Yoongi went to the bakery downstairs. They had a new V App broadcast schedule to commemorate their 3 million followers. A cake was needed. He had just finished his order when someone tugged the sleeve of his shirt.
“Hyung!” A bright eyed Park Jimin exclaimed, dressed in his cute school uniform.
“Hey there.”
“Your hair in not green anymore, hyung!”
Yoongi chuckled. “No, it’s not. Now it’s white.”
“It still looks cool,” Jimin said, nodding enthusiastically.
“Thanks.” The employee of the bakery handed him his box full of cupcakes. He took one out. “Here, have this,” he said as he gave it to Jimin.
“For me?” Jimin asked, smile big. “Thanks hyung! You’re my favourite!”
Yoongi ruffled the boy’s hair. “Of course I am. Who else could it be? See ya, kid.”
He left the bakery with one less cupcake and a smile on his face. Okay, so maybe not all children were little devils on a mission. They were kind of cute. Especially If said children came in the form of a very adorable six-years-old Park Jimin.