Archive of Our Own ^beta

The screw turned once more. Creaking protests from the components underneath it went unheard. The screwdriver spun ever dutifully in her hand, yet her mind lay firmly in the past, drifting further and further back. 

She remembered the feel of grass between her fingers. Before then, the rush of cool air on her face and the sound of laughter. The warmth of the bonfire. Seeing the fireworks light up the sky, and seeing those same lights reflected like a sea of diamonds in the eyes of–

A loud snapping sound broke Kurara from her reverie. She had tightened the screw far too much, causing the components to break under the pressure. She clicked her tongue in annoyance. “These damn low quality parts!” She yelled to no one in particular. “An Oosuzuki shouldn’t have to deal with such inferior materials!” 

Her hand slammed onto the table, the various metallic bits jumping and rattling from the impact. While it was true that the parts she had available weren’t of the highest quality, it was well within her skills to make them work. She lost focus–she knew that. Though it would be more accurate to say that she had no focus at all today. Kurara leaned back as far as the chair would allow and sighed. Try as she might, she couldn’t get her mind to do anything but replay the events from the previous night again and again. Perhaps her breakfast had simply been too light and this was her brain’s way of making demands of her? Yes, that simply must be it. A little snack and some tea would do wonders, she assured herself.

The short walk through the hall was a very quiet one. It was late enough in the morning that the breakfast crowd must have dispersed completely. The wall between the metal shop and the cafeteria was pretty thin, after all, so if someone was still shuffling about the cafeteria, she likely would have heard them. Well, that suited her fine. She could simply dip in for a quick pick-me-up and return to work. She slid the cafeteria door open.

Darumi was seated in one of the center tables with a half-eaten pile of assorted cakes and snacks, complete with a bit of cutely missed cream on her cheek. Kurara supposed that she simply must have been so distracted that she didn’t notice the presence of someone in the cafeteria. It wasn’t particularly unusual to see Darumi eating so late in the morning, considering what a late riser she tended to be. 

Kurara had half a mind to criticize her choice of breakfast, but held back, knowing that she had come to the cafeteria for the same kind of treats. Honestly, though, she thought to herself, she had only ever seen Darumi eat real food whenever she decided to make curry. Maybe she should make it again soon…

Tucking that thought away, she entered the cafeteria. The clacking of her heels echoed through the mostly empty room, and Darumi looked up to see who had entered. Once she saw Kurara, for the briefest moment, the corners of her lips fell. Her eyes darkened ever so slightly. Then, in a flash, it was gone, replaced by Darumi’s regular manic smile. “Mornin’!” She yelled before returning to her food, clinking her silverware and crumpling wrappers.

“Uh.” Kurara realized that she had stopped crossing the room. She gave her head a light shake and continued towards the Ration-O-Matic. “Good morning.” Had Kurara seen correctly? She absent mindedly punched in an order of cake–coincidentally the same cake Darumi had now mostly eaten–and black tea. She was all too familiar with what disappointment looked like, and that was surely it. The order dispensed. But was it? It was gone so quickly. 

Darumi for her part, munching away at her food with the comically exaggerated chomping sounds Kurara had come to expect from her, did not seem disappointed about much of anything, let alone Kurara. Maybe she simply had imagined it for some reason. She collected her food and turned to return to the metal shop.

“Later!” Darumi called with a mouth half-full of food, her smile as wide as ever.

“Bye.” Kurara replied, balancing her items in one hand as she closed the door behind her. She could hear the sounds of Darumi’s exaggerated eating through the hall, and muffled through the wall of the metal shop as she sat down at the workbench. 

No, no, that was definitely disappointment. It had to have been. An Oosuzuki would not make such an error in judgement. She took a sip of tea, the sounds from the cafeteria still finding their way into the shop. Then again, it had been so brief. If she had happened to blink in that moment, she would have missed it entirely. It could have been an errant twitch. Surely that was it.

She picked away at her cake. The sounds from the cafeteria had stopped, finally. Silence filled the room. She was absolutely sure–it was disappointment. It was a look she had seen so many times in her childhood trying to meet the rigorous Oosuzuki family standards. While it had been quite some time since a personage as great as herself had personally beheld that expression, knowledge of it had been cut deep into her heart. She’d never forget it, and she’d never mistake it.

Then again, she thought as she ate the last sliver of cake, what possible reason could Darumi have to be disappointed with her? The two hardly interacted. As far as she could recall, the majority of their interactions over the past sixty-or-so days had consisted of basically as much substance. Simple greetings and farewells. She deliberately ignored the notable-but-currently-irrelevant exception nagging at her mind. Clearly it must have been some sort of coincidence.

Kurara finished the last of her tea and set the cup on her plate. Dimly, she heard the gentle click of the cafeteria door in the distance. Coincidence, she reaffirmed to herself. No other possibility. Even if there was another possibility, she didn’t have the time to think about it today. The invaders were due to attack soon and these fences weren’t going to electrify themselves. 

Fueled by caffeine and sugar, she valiantly kept a tight reign on her thoughts for the rest of the day, completing the allotted work in time. Or at least, that’s what she told herself. In truth, she knew, it was a simple task that should have only taken a few hours at most. Instead, it took the majority of her day.

Ugh, whatever! She snapped inwardly. Everyone has bad days! Everyone! All that matters is that the job is done! She packed the fences into the ready area and washed her hands using a small sink tucked away in the corner of the room. 

The clock on the wall told her it was time for dinner and her stomach reminded her that she skipped lunch. She took a deep breath and tried to center herself. Today’s work was over. It was time to put today’s problems behind her, eat a nice meal, and then sleep peacefully. She straightened her back and strode through the hall, already alive with the din of conversation, to the cafeteria.

Nearly everyone else had already arrived, she noticed as she pulled open the door. She scanned the room as quickly as possible before her eyes landed on Darumi, who had just been looking up to see who entered the room. She saw that look again. Again! Why?! But it was already gone before she could even blink, replaced with the overly wide grin she was used to.

“Kurara?” Nozomi’s voice came from behind her. Kurara realized she stopped in the doorway. “Are you alright?”

“I’m FINE!” Kurara said far, far too loudly, before near stomping into the cafeteria.

“Geez,” she heard Gaku’s voice from somewhere nearby. “What pissed her off so bad?”

“Shut the hell up, Gaku!” Kurara snapped, swinging towards whatever corner of the room he had turned into his hovel. “I can’t hear you over how poor you are!”

“Wh–” Gaku nearly dropped his chopsticks before turning around in his chair. “Wait, can you hear me or not? Make up your mind!”

Kurara pointedly ignored him and now-fully stomped to the Ration-O-Matic, slamming in a basically random order of items. It was only through providence that she ended up with a relatively edible meal rather than the next starring entree of Tsukumo Cuisine. She collected her order, strode across the room and picked a seat far from that reprobate Gaku, and slammed her tray down as she sat. 

She saw her meal for the first time. Grilled fish, white rice and plain vegetables. Far from the high class cuisine she was used to, but passable enough. If only that miserable pauper hadn’t distracted her, she’d be eating a real meal right now. 

Whatever. Whatever! It didn’t matter. She straightened her back and shoulders, tilted her chin down and started tucking food between the gap her posture created at the bottom of her mask.

“Oooh~” A sweetly toxic voice creeped from beyond the bottom of her mask, the exposure she felt causing her to give a tiny yelp and drop her chopsticks. “So that’s how you do it.”

Kurara looked up. Across from her, Darumi was seated, nearly pressing her ear to the table looking upwards at Kurara. “Wh-wha-what do you think you’re d-doing?!” She stammered.

“Aw, just tryin’ to get a peek of that cute face of yours again!” Darumi said with a giggle. “Don’t mind me!”

Kurara flushed, the color of her mask gradually shifting from tomatillo to roma. “Mind your own business!” She shouted.

“C’mon!” Darumi cackled. “Just a peek!”

Kurara slammed the table. “N-No! How dare you bother a lady during her dinner!”

“Fine,” Darumi sighed, leaning back in her chair. “Sure looks like a pain to eat that way, though.”

“How the hell else am I supposed to…” Kurara muttered to herself as she picked up her chopsticks and resumed her posture. She paused and tried to push any thoughts out of her mind as she deliberated which bland piece of food to eat next.

“You could try not wearing it.” Darumi’s voice was much softer, much quieter than Kurara had ever heard it before. If she didn’t know better, it could have been an entirely different person. She looked up again, Darumi sitting across from her wearing a soft smile that clashed with her make-up. Darumi looked like she could have been an entirely different person.

“I–” Kurara swallowed. “Impossible!” She looked down again and tried to eat her food as quickly as she could, while blocking any possible sight line under her mask. Immediately after choking down the final grain of rice, she stood and scurried out of the crowded cafeteria straight up to her room.

Once the door clicked behind her, she steeled herself. She was fairly sure she was the first to leave the cafeteria, so it should be fine. She grabbed the sides of her mask. It protected her from a lot of things. The gazes of others. Debris carried on the wind. Mostly, though, it protected her from herself. 

However, she couldn’t very well shower with the damn thing on, so…

She took a deep breath, pulled, and with a gentle pop, her head was free from her mask.

“I’m! So! Stuuuupiiiiid!” She screamed at the top of her lungs. “Dumb! Idiot! Moron! What am I even doing?!” She yelled again, rubbing the sides of her head and making a tangled mess of her typically perfect hair. “What the hell is wrong with me?!” 

The yelling and self-flagellation continued as she threw her clothes randomly across the room and stomped into the shower. There, predictably–for her, at least–the yelling gave way to sobbing, the water pouring over her dutifully hiding her tears from no one in particular. Her yelling turned inward. Moron! Idiot! Wasting a whole day! She choked out repeated apologies to a someone who didn’t even exist.

It was quite some time before her bottled up emotions fizzled to a stop. Lethargy taking over, she trudged out of the shower, pulled on her nightgown and fell into her bed, lacking the energy to even properly dry her hair. 

Ugh, what an awful day. If only it could had been more like yesterday… where was she twenty-four hours ago? She completely lost sense of time and didn’t have the energy to check the clock. Were they gathered around the bonfire? Was she running around the yard? Had they been watching the fireworks, or…

She blocked out the memory. 

No. This was all yesterday’s fault. If it hadn’t been for yesterday, she would have been focused enough to get her work done on time! She could have gotten everything done, and extra! She could have had time to read a book or watch a movie or something! Then she wouldn’t have gotten distracted and had a bland as hell dinner! It was all because of yesterday! Yesterday! Yesterday…

She fell asleep thinking of yesterday.

A night’s rest later, she awoke to the sudden blaring of her alarm. There was an attack expected today, so the plan was to gather in the war room and prepare in advance. Kurara had arrived quite early, beaten only by Hiruko, as usual. Sirei and Nigou did not count since they were both AI that practically lived in the war room anyway. Kurara crossed her arms and waited for her comrades to arrive. The past two days were firmly behind her, now. One by one, her allies entered the room. She simply had to focus on getting through this next month, and that was all. The room was almost full now, missing only the typical late arrivers. No more distractions, she would just keep her mind set on the tasks ahead. Darumi entered the room. Kurara’s gaze immediately snapped to her face to see her reaction.

There it was again! Again! And did she just sigh as well?! At her, the great Kurara Oosuzuki?! What could she have possibly done this early in the morning to garner such a reaction?! Nothing! There was no possible thing at all! Absolutely nothing!

Tsubasa’s complaint about cannon fodder brought her back to reality. Right, they were about to enter a life-and-death situation. Kurara could dwell on this later. She took a deep breath and centered herself before joining the meeting as normal. The alarm eventually blared, they transformed, and used the jump pad to fly out onto the field. 

The only concern for this battle were the weird voices coming from the enemy creatures, but it was no issue for Kurara. Attending her family’s frequent high class business parties had left her extremely proficient at simply not listening to any of the voices around her whenever she so choosed.

The battle proceeded smoothly. With no enemy commander, it was quite easy. The front lines cut down the majority of the enemies with no effort. Takemaru and Tsubasa were circling the building, cutting down whatever strayed from the main packs. Anything that slipped through fell to Kurara’s expertly placed turrets. It was far too easy. The complete lack of tension let her mind wander. Three looks, now. Three! Far too many to be any sort of coincidence. But why? Frustration twisted and writhed within her chest, her grip growing tighter around the handle of her shovel.

Fortunately for her, though, she saw a lone little orb waddling past the others, just out of the range of her towers. The perfect target to vent her frustrations. She glided across the battlefield, slipping off her shovel as she approached her target. The way it looked up at her somehow read as smug. It pathetically waved its tiny spear at her. This horrid little creature thought it could stand against her! 

“How dare you look down on me!” She screamed as she slammed the flat side of her shovel down on it, splattering it against the ground. She gave it several more whacks, just to be sure. Looking up, she saw two of the orb’s little squad mates wiggling around. She swung her shovel, roughly cleaving one in two.

The last one threw up its tiny arms and started to run away. Kurara hopped back on her shovel and gave chase. It eluded her for an annoyingly long time before she had the satisfaction of crushing it into the dirt. It was a short lived victory, as one of the purple creatures slashed at her with its claws. She barely backed away in time. She knew melee combat was not her forte, but knowledge did not stop her from swinging her shovel like a baseball bat and knocking the creature onto its back. She stood over it as it looked up to her, struggling to stand. “Don’t give me that look!” She shrieked as she thrust the shovel through its neck, severing head from shoulders.

Her senses vaguely returned to her as she yanked her shovel from the earth. The sound of her turrets seemed far too distant. How far had she gone? Before she could look up, the ground around her darkened as a large shadow subsumed her. Swallowing, she turned and looked up to see one of the large bear-like creatures towering above her, its arm already raised to deliver the same punishment onto her that she delivered onto the smaller creatures. She stepped backwards and tripped over the body of the purple creature she had just killed. 

Well, that’s it, she thought to herself. She braced for a painful resurrection.

The blow never came, the bear-like creature instead emitting the vaguest thunk . A knife was sticking out of its forehead. Then another, and another. Within moments, the pincushioned creature fell backwards with a thunderous crash. A figure sprinted past her into the main fray, howling with laughter.

“Onward!” She heard Kyoshika’s voice. “Lady Darumi has broken their line!”

Kurara sighed with relief and mounted her shovel, floating her way to her place on the back line. She had no intention of admitting it out loud, but she was very grateful of being on the receiving end of one of Darumi’s psychotic rushes into the enemy. Those near-suicidal attacks were one of the few things she really recognized Darumi for, she realized.

The rest of the combat had finished without event. Barely a scratch on their side, let alone a casualty. Having vented sufficient frustration, Kurara had even joined in on their, frankly sort of embarrassing, post-combat cheer. The team returned to the school, got cleaned up, and shared a late breakfast.

Kurara wandered the building’s halls. Post-combat seemed to be the universal break day, with everyone lazing around in their rooms or in the various leisure facilities. Kurara considered picking up a book, but honestly, her brain was still so fried between the emotionally turbulent previous day and near death experience today. 

She wanted something dumb. Maybe something kinda trashy, too. Something she could intake without having to exert any effort moving. A sex scene or two or four wouldn’t hurt, either.

She wandered to the rec room and pushed open the doors. A couple of others were in the room already, playing games with each other or yanking the crank of the slot machine again and again. The Gift-O-Matic came alive with bloops and beeps as she scrolled the catalog. There was a movie projector, as she had recalled seeing before, but the only movies available were a collection of a specific slasher movie series. 

Under normal circumstances, she would have at least internally yelled something like “what the hell?! What’s the point of such a ridiculously narrow selection!”, but frankly she did not have the energy. Moreover, what she knew about the series meant that it ticked all of the boxes she was looking for, even if wasn’t necessarily the way in which she was thinking. 

Yelling at dumb characters getting killed in contrived ways might be just the outlet she needed. She dispensed the projector and the movies, spending a few seconds looking at the cover of the collection.

“Oh, I haven’t seen those in ages!” She heard a voice from below her. Darumi was looking up at her from one of the slot machine seats, apparently able to recognize the series just from the back of the box. Her smile grew wide and twisted, her trademark make-up making it look like her face could split in half. “Let me know if you want a watching buddy!” She cackled.

In normal circumstances, Kurara might have brushed it off, grown frustrated with these constant coincidences, or made some sort of excuse to avoid her. However, she was frankly too tired for her mind to race today, and she did see potential she could leverage. 

If she could get Darumi alone, she could find an opportunity to figure out why she kept getting that look from her. Appreciation for Darumi saving her life earlier that day was also a large factor in her thinking that she chose simply to not acknowledge. 

“Very well,” Kurara replied. “Meet me in my room in an hour.”

Darumi’s laughter stopped suddenly, her eyes widening and her smile dropping. A moment passed and she was smiling again–a somehow much different smile than before. “You got it, princess!”

Ignoring her inward reaction to that nickname, she turned and set off to her room. Something about the way Darumi smiled left her with a nagging feeling in the back of her mind.

Or, actually, it would be more accurate to say that she became aware of a nagging feeling that had been there for a while, just that it was now strong enough to gain her attention. 

She arrived at her room and decided to put the thought aside for now. Kurara set the projector box down on her table and pried it open. Unfortunately, there was more assembly required than she expected. She sighed. At least it was something to do to pass the time.

Ah! She clicked her tongue. She forgot to ask Darumi to bring popcorn.

The task was simple enough that her mind had ample time to roam. She had, in the past, maybe, somewhat, kinda thought about going on a movie date already, as a general concept with no one specific in mind. It was a simple thought exercise she had in the early days to familiarize herself with the building. No thoughts of many potential suitors clamoring to spend their time with her had ever entered her mind at any point in the process. 

That said, the school was sorely lacking in potential romantic activities, and even more if you wanted those activities to have any semblance of privacy. That was when she had made note of the projector in the Gift-O-Matic. She liked watching movies, and two people sharing their thoughts on a piece of media together was a sure strategy to get to know someone better. The setting of a dimly lit bedroom was also suitably romantic. 

How funny, then, that she would end up in the exact situation for decidedly non-romantic reasons. Ah, damn. She couldn’t see where the projector’s plugs needed to go with her mask on. After a small sigh and a smaller pop, the mask came free from her head.

Oh god. Was this a date? Did she ask Darumi on a date? What else could two people alone in a dark bedroom be besides a date? Did she mean for it to be a date? Did Darumi think it was a date? Are they dating now? She had never dated a girl before. Or, uh, anyone really. Did she need to do something special? Should she wear some perfume or something? Wait, what if it wasn’t a date? Oh, the projector’s working. The mask popped back on her head.

Of course it wasn’t a date, she reminded herself. This was getting an opportunity to figure out why Darumi kept giving her weird looks. Nothing more, nothing less. They hardly knew each other, after all. 

Besides, Darumi was of the lower class. A rich heiress and a lower-class misery fetishist? The two could not possibly be more different. Such things were simply just out of the question, not to be considered. Regardless, she spent the remaining time checking the lighting and freshening up.

She nearly jumped out of her seat when the knock finally came. “You may enter!” She called, before immediately busying herself with putting the movie disc into the projector. Whatever the case was, she knew if she saw that look yet again, she’d be too fixated on it to enjoy the movie at all. The best option was simply to not look at all, she decided. 

“I brought popcorn!” Darumi cheered as she swung the door open. Kurara felt her plop down on the seat next to her and a disturbingly large tub of popcorn appeared on the table. “Can you believe this is, like, the default size?”

“It’s so huge.” Kurara remarked on the daunting size of the tub. “One person couldn’t possibly eat this much.”

“That’s what I said!” Darumi chirped. “I just typed in ‘popcorn’ and this huge thing came out!”

“I guess they meant for us to share it.” Kurara finished fiddling with the projector and leaned back, remote in hand. “Both movies and popcorn are better shared with others, after all.”

“Really? I wouldn’t know.” Darumi shrugged. “I’ve always watched movies alone.”

“Well, consider yourself privileged to have your first experience be with a personage as great as I!” Kurara pressed play, and grabbed a handful of popcorn. It was the super-expensive theatre kind, the kind that was 40% butter, 40% salt and 10% actual popcorn.

The two snacked together as the movie built towards the first kill, at which time Darumi immediately howled with laughter and yelled “Get rekt, normie!” Kurara couldn’t help but be caught up in her excitement. “Moron!” Kurara shouted at the screen. “The closet is literally the only place in the room! Of course he’s gonna check it!”

“Oh my god!” Darumi cackled when the killer burst through a wall. “Get ganked, noob!”  And so the movie proceeded with each of them yelling at the characters as they got picked off one by one.

Kurara was having fun. She was having quite a bit more fun than she expected, actually. And even when the movie was trying to build up to a jump scare, Darumi would start bubbling over with anticipatory giggles before it could even happen. Was she… trying to warn Kurara in advance? Or was she simply that excited for classic horror movie violence?

 In what felt like no time at all, the credits played. After so much yelling and laughing, Kurara felt as if a weight she didn’t know was there had been lifted from her.

Though, watching the names scroll past had left her feeling a bit wistful. It felt like it was over so soon. She quickly checked the clock. It wasn’t even dinner time yet. The tub of popcorn was only half empty. 

“...wanna watch the next one?”

A brief look of conflict flashed across Darumi’s face. Like the others, it had been so quick and fleeting that Kurara could have easily missed that it had even happened at all. “You know it!” Darumi’s smile returned. “Those dumbass teens aren’t gonna murder themselves!”

And so the second movie came and went, the two of them shouting and laughing the whole way. Darumi’s enthusiasm had been absolutely infectious. Kurara would never admit it out loud, but had she watched these movies alone, she probably would have gotten kinda scared while doing it. Darumi’s constant laughter and jokes simply highlighted how naturally goofy these sorts of movies were, despite their tone on the surface. 

The second movie’s conclusion had left her with that wistful feeling again, though unfortunately her hunger told her that it was definitely time for dinner. The now nearly-empty popcorn tub could satiate them no longer.

Kurara sighed. “I suppose it’s time to go join the others for dinner.”

“Hey, um, do you…” Darumi’s voice was much quieter than normal. Kurara turned to look, and she saw that Darumi had been looking away slightly, her face concealed by her hair, the dim lighting, and Kurara’s own mask. Darumi was rubbing her arm with one hand, and balling the fabric of the hem of her shirt with the other. “...just wanna get a bunch of snacks and watch the next one instead?”

Yes, Kurara wanted to say. That is exactly what I want to do and it had not even occurred to me that was an option until you said it. 

Instead, she said, “Well, I guess I can free up some time in my busy schedule.” Together, they descended the school into the cafeteria, discussing their favorite kills so far. They entered the cafeteria to a handful of raised eyebrows at their animated conversation, and left with a pile of snacks, treats, and drinks, as well as several more raised eyebrows. They returned to Kurara’s room and set their bountiful spread across her table, even piling some on top of the projector itself.

“Are all these wrappers gonna be a problem?” Darumi asked through a mouth already half-full with some kind of pastry.

“Fret not.” Kurara smiled. “I’ll just make Nigou clean my room tomorrow.”

Darumi responded by snickering and openly dropping a wrapper on the floor in front of her. Kurara laughed herself and started the third movie. The two, eager for something more substantial than popcorn, tore into the various foods in front of them.

“Sushi?” Darumi tilted her head.

“But, of course!” Kurara spoke with a smugly matter-of-fact voice. “Quickly made with high quality ingredients, and edible by hand! Perfect for a member of high society like myself.” As if to prove her point, she swiftly grabbed a piece and tucked it under her mask.

“I guess I never thought about it that way before.” Darumi paused. “Mind if I steal a piece?”

“You may.”

Darumi reached over and grabbed a piece, popping it into her mouth. She was silent for a moment after swallowing. “Think I still prefer my snacks. But I’ll keep it in mind for the next time I gotta actually eat real food!”

“You know, you really should eat better food.” Kurara scanned over Darumi’s choice of snacks, each more unhealthy than the last.

“Nah, this is fine!” Darumi cackled. “I’ll stick with my processed sugars and carbs!” She paused for a moment before speaking again, that particular hint of softness returning to her voice. “Besides, the only real food I actually like is your curry.”

“W-Well,” Kurara stammered, looking away. “I suppose I could be convinced to make it again soon.”

“Really?” Darumi cheered. “Nice! I always feel so hyped up after eating that stuff!”

“I’ll take the compliment, but that’s probably just because it’s the first real nutrients you’ve eaten in–” A scream from the projector cut off Kurara’s sentence. They missed the first kill of the movie.

“Ah, damn it!” Darumi waved her arms around looking for the remote. “We missed it! Rewind! Rewind!”

The movie, once they restarted it, proceeded much like the previous two, though the quality had been noticeably dropping. They’d taunt the main characters and laugh at their ridiculous demises in between chomping away at snacks. They proceeded to the fourth movie without question, though the passing into night had left them considerably less animated than before. Half way through the movie, the bed time announcement played.

“Shut the hell up, Sirei!” Kurara shrieked, the interruption revitalizing her.

Darumi also seemed to catch a second wind. “Go to hell, old man!”

The two laughed again and finished off the fourth movie. It had been considerably worse than the last three, but that did not diminish the fun they had watching it together. When it finally ended, Kurara couldn’t stifle a yawn. Darumi stretched, interlocking her fingers and reaching them far above her head. 

Kurara knew she couldn’t make it through another movie, but for some reason, she couldn’t bring herself to say that just yet. The credits ended, the screen going black. The two sat in dark silence for a while.

“Well, tomorrow’s work lays ahead of us.” Kurara finally drove herself to speak. “Let us call it a night here.”

“Yeah…” Darumi’s voice was laden with a sorrowful tone that Kurara did not completely understand, her face once again turned away to some dark corner of the room. “Thanks for hanging out with me. It was fun.”

Something about the way Darumi had spoke left Kurara momentarily stunned. She watched as the other girl stood, stretched again, and headed for the door. “W-Wait!” She shouted, almost out of some sort of reflex. Darumi turned to look at her, head tilted. “...do you want to watch another after dinner tomorrow?”

A moment of genuine surprise crossed Darumi’s face. “A-Are you sure?” She looked away. “I mean, the rest of the series gets even worse from here.”

Kurara thought a moment. “This can’t possibly be all we were meant to have. I shall ask Sirei in the morning. And if not,” she shrugged, “I suppose we just have to give the movies the thrashing they deserve.”

“Alright, then.” Darumi smiled again, this one again somehow different from the others. “See you tomorrow!” Her voice returned to its usual shrill tone and she left Kurara’s room. 

After a stretch of her own, Kurara quickly showered and hopped into bed. She felt more relaxed than she had in weeks, a light fluttery feeling flooding her chest. She began to drift into a pleasant sleep. The frustration that had filled her for the past few days had dissipated almost entirely.

Wait a minute. Her eyes shot open. She forgot. She had completely forgot! The entire point was that she could corner Darumi and get an answer about that weird look! It slipped her mind entirely. 

She sighed and rolled onto her side. No matter. She resolved to not worry about it for now. There would be another opportunity tomorrow. A small part of her mind called upon her to reflect on why, exactly, there was another opportunity if she had forgotten about it in the first place, but again she decided to ignore that thought.

Night passed and morning came. The feeling in her chest had diminished only slightly, her steps feeling as if she was floating slightly with every movement. A smile was plastered across her face, not that anyone could see it. Before heading to her morning training with her Second Defense comrades, she stopped by the war room.

“Nigou!” She called out as she slammed the door open. “I require you to clean my room!”

“Not a problem, Miss Oosuzuki!” Nigou saluted. “Leave it to me! I’ll get right to it after my morning meeting with the Honorable Sirei!”

“Sirei!” Kurara continued, turning to the other small blob creature they had gotten so used to. “Why is the selection of films available in the Gift-O-Matic so small?! A woman of my stature requires more variety!”

“Oh, that…” Sirei leaned back in his chair and rubbed the top of his head. “Well, we were gonna load it up with a bunch of movies, but then the selection was basically entirely movies.” He opened a nearby drawer and started to dig around. “We ended up just leaving the one and putting the rest of them on this. Meant to give it to you guys ages ago but it slipped my mind.” 

He pulled a USB drive from the drawer and plugged it into the side of his head. After a moment, he nodded to himself and held it towards Kurara. “Just wanted to make sure I had the right one.” He laughed to himself as if he had made a joke.

“Very well, then.” Kurara reached for the USB drive, but it remained firmly attached to Sirei’s grip… somehow.

“Remember to keep your eyes on the prize, Oosuzuki.” His voice darkened considerably from before. “We’re here to win a war, not play around.”

“I am aware of our circumstances,” Kurara glared in return. The drive came loose from his grip.

Sirei grinned again, his voice returning to it’s normal jovial tone. “Well, in any case, have fun kiddo!” He leaned back in his chair again, putting his arms behind his head. “For the glory of humanity!”

Kurara shoved the drive in her pocket and left the room. Sirei’s strange behaviour hadn’t even dented her mood. She checked the clock. There was still time before the Second Defense team met up in the gym. 

Not wanting to waste any time, she returned to room, her steps light. Once there, she rushed over to the projector and, to her absolute astonishment, plugged the USB drive in on the first try.

The number of choices available to her was, to put it simply, massive. The sheer volume of it overwhelmed her. How did they cram so many onto this tiny drive?! She scrolled on and on, the list seemingly never ending, the vast vast majority of titles being ones she had never heard of before. 

Panic bubbled up from her stomach. With so many choices, how could she possibly be sure she’d pick a good one? And, on top of that, one that Darumi would like? They could laugh at cheesy slasher movies, but was there anywhere else their tastes would intersect? Should they just pick a random one together? There had to be some good way to narrow down this list!

“Miss Oosuzuki?” A voice came from the entryway, shocking Kurara so much that she dropped the projector’s remote. Nigou wiggled into the room. “You should hurry to the gym!” He said with a wide, polite smile. “Your comrades are probably already there at this time. Leave your room to me!”

“R-Right.” Kurara stood and hurried out of the room, stopping for a moment before popping her head back through the doorway. “And this place better be spotless when I get back!”

“Not a problem!” Nigou responded with a sing-song voice.

Kurara hurried down to the gym. Once she entered, she immediately addressed her comrades, who had already begun their warm-up stretches. “My apologies. I had a small task to take care of this morning.”

“Ah, Lady Kurara!” Kyoshika beamed at her, as she did to everyone she ever saw. “It is good to see you well!”

“Of course I am well.” Kurara shrugged and shook her head. “Why would I not be?”

Smiling with the same stupid puppy-dog face as she always did, Kyoshika continued, “I had been worried after all the shrieking I heard coming from your room last night!”

An absolutely inhuman sound choked through Kurara’s throat. She froze in her spot, hands hovering just above the weights she had meant to grab. Of course, she realized. Of course if she could, from time to time, hear the things Kyoshika got up to in her room, that the opposite would be true as well. The thought never occurred to her.

“Shrieking?” Nozomi tilted her head, looking nakedly concerned. “Kurara, is everything alright?”
“E-Everything is fine! There’s nothing to worry about!” Kurara insisted far too forcefully.

Moko put a hand on her shoulder. “Kurara, if there’s something wrong, you can talk to us, you know?”

“I-I said! Everything is fine!”

“You know,” Yugamu spoke up, wearing the sadistic wicked grin of someone who had just grabbed the ladle and was ecstatic to stir the pot, “I ran into Darumi last night.”

Kurara visibly shrunk on the spot. “S-So what? Did something happen?”

“Not particularly.” Yugamu’s smile twisted. “I was just heading to my room when I saw her coming out of yours.” He brought his hand to his mouth and ran his tongue across his finger. “Gotta say… never seen a look like THAT on her face before.”

“Oh.” Nozomi flushed and looked away, apparently finding a set of dumbbells to look particularly interesting in that moment.. “I see.”

Moko, much in the same way, looked over the bench press in the corner of the room. “I saw you two in the cafeteria last night but… never woulda guessed…”

Kurara was mortified. “Wh.. Wh..?” She stomped so hard the equipment around her shook. “What the hell?! It’s nothing like that!” She stomped again. “She just saw me getting some movies from the Gift-O-Matic and offered to watch them together!” She stomped a third time. “That’s all!”

“Oh, so it was a movie!” Kyoshika clapped her hands together. “The thought never entered my mind!”

Kurara whirled towards Kyoshika, her arms flailing in the air in anger. “The only thing that ‘enters’ you is that goddamn sword of yours!”

Kyoshika instantly flushed red and took a step back, raising a hand in protest. “I-It is not like that at all! She simply wishes to routinely check my muscle development! It is vital for my development as a warrior!”

“I-In any case,” Nozomi waved a hand, trying to move the conversation elsewhere, “if that’s all it was, you could have just told us, Kurara.”

Kurara crossed her arms and looked away. Why did she try to hide it? There wasn’t anything strange about it. Just two people watching movies together. As normal as a fish in water. Still, her gut reaction was to avoid mentioning it all together. Why? She decided to put the thought aside for now.

The conversation seemed like it was going to return to normal, smiles returning to the girl’s faces as they picked up their equipment. Yugamu, for his part, hadn’t moved. A serious look darkened his face as he stared at the floor, hand cupping his chin. “Kurara,” he eventually spoke, “the movies from the Gift-O-Matic… do you mean that old slasher series?”

“It’s not like there are any other movies available on that thing.” Kurara shrugged.

“Yeah,” Moko chimed in. “I remember looking through it before when I felt like watching some romance tear-jerkers. Real slim pickings in there.”

“I asked Sirei, and he gave me a drive with many more movies. We can probably make a copy.”

“Oh wouldja mind?” Moko smiled as she lifted an obscene amount of weights from the floor in one go. “I’d really appreciate it!”

“I’ll see what I can do.” Kurara stated as she finished her stretches. She looked over again at Yugamu, who had silently moved to his own training. Whatever had been bothering him, he had apparently decided not to elaborate. 

Kurara looked back to Moko, continuing her conversation. “There’s honestly a ridiculous amount of movies on there, though. I have no idea how you’d find anything without knowing the name in advance…”

“Are you meeting up with Darumi again?” Nozomi asked as if it was an innocent question with no ulterior motives.

“Y… Yeah…” Kurara answered far too hesitantly. “Not that I know what to watch, though…”

“Why not ask someone who knows her better?” Moko offered as she slid under the bench press, the bar loaded with so much weight that it was starting to bend. “I’m sure she’s mentioned something to someone before.”

“Mm…” Kurara began her morning jog around the gym.

“Oh!” Nozomi chirped. “Why not Hiruko? I’ve seen them talking before!”

“Oh… yeah!” Moko heaved between reps. “Doesn’t… Darumi… call her… ‘Mistress’... or something?”

True, Kurara had heard that before, too. The Mistress thing bothered her for some reason, but Hiruko would probably be a good lead.

“Hiruko?” Yugamu decided to rejoin the conversation. “If it’s her you want, you’d better hurry.” He set down his weights, stretching his hands after. “I saw her eating breakfast early today, so she probably intends on leaving soon.”

“What?!” Kurara shot. “Why didn’t you say anything earlier?!”

“I, uh, just did.”

“I… I’ll be back!” Kurara’s jog turned into a full sprint to the door, and through the halls. She glanced into the entrance hall as she headed towards the cafeteria, and detoured immediately once spotting Hiruko waiting there.

Hiruko turned towards her as she entered. “You’re ea–” She paused, looking slightly surprised, but immediately composed herself. “Kurara.”

Kurara had run here without thinking, and now she found herself extremely out of breath with no idea what to say. Should she just ask outright? “Give… me… a second…” She huffed.

“Did you… sprint here?” Had Kurara been more prepared, she could have enjoyed this brief moment of surprising the normally unflappable Hiruko. “Well, while I have you here…” Hiruko continued. “I did want to ask you a question.”

“What… is it?” Kurara gasped, finding it very difficult to regain her breath with her mask blocking all the fresh air.

Hiruko took a step forward, her gaze turning cold as she looked down on Kurara. “What were you doing with Darumi last night?”

An absolutely inhuman sound would have choked out from Kurara’s throat had she had the oxygen required to make such a sound. Instead, only a strangled puff of air escaped. “W-We were just… watching movies… the ones from the Gift-O-Matic.”

“I see.” Hiruko’s gaze didn’t shift or soften. She allowed Kurara time to finally catch her breath. “And why did you sprint here so early in the morning?”

“Yugamu thought you’d be leaving soon.” Kurara, finally no longer gasping for air straightened herself. “Before you left, I wanted to ask…” She hesitated. “I-If you knew… uh…” Hiruko’s glare intensified ever so slightly, but it was enough to make her wilt under it. “What movies… Darumi likes….”

Hiruko crossed her arms, tilting her head back slightly and looked down the bridge of her nose at Kurara. Her gaze was so intense that it felt like she was piercing straight through Kurara’s mask, that she could see every micro movement of her hidden face. “Why?” 

Her other question had been exactly that–a question. This was a demand.

“I-I…” Kurara stammered. Why? So she could ask Darumi about that look… right? Was that why? Nagging thoughts nagged at her harder than before, but she now was not exactly the time to think them through. It felt like Hiruko could see every bead of sweat dripping down her face. Why? Why did she want to know? What was it she wanted to know? 

“I… just…” Questions and feelings collided in her mind. If she could only make sense of it all. “Just… want to know…”

Hiruko’s glare rooted Kurara to the ground so strongly that her straight, black hair might as well been made of snakes. The two stood silent for an agonizingly long amount of time.

Eventually, Hiruko sighed, relaxing her shoulders. “Fine.” She pulled a pad from her pocket and scribbled down several titles on it. “I recommend these in this order.” She tore the sheet away, and held it out to Kurara.

Kurara reached for it gingerly, each of her muscles feeling as if they had just been stone. “T-Thanks.” Shaking slightly, she turned to leave.

“Kurara.” Hiruko’s voice came. Kurara turned to see Hiruko looking towards the ground, her face wrenched as if she was struggling to make a choice. “About Darumi…” She paused and after a moment passed, she sighed and relaxed again, shaking her head. 

“Nevermind. Just…” She looked directly into Kurara’s eyes, through her mask. “Be kind to her.” It was not a demand, but a plea.

“O-Of course.” Kurara tried to force her typical personality, but Hiruko’s direct lock onto her eyes made it unconvincing. “W-Who do you think I am?”

Hiruko shrugged and didn’t respond. Kurara took her leave. She returned to the gym, Hiruko’s words to her replaying again and again. It was very much unlike the ice queen Hiruko to make such a request. That contrast alone was enough to make Kurara sure that she had very seriously meant it. 

She pushed open the gym doors to find the room had already become empty, all the equipment–including her own–neatly put away. That conversation must have taken longer than she thought.

Her stomach growled, as if to remind her of the time and where she should be. She headed to the cafeteria, passing Takumi making a hurried exit as she arrived. Going to do whatever mysterious X-rated plans he and Hiruko had again, she supposed. 

Entering the cafeteria, she noticed that all others were still crowded around the room, some still getting their food. Well, almost all others… Darumi was missing. Probably just sleeping in, Kurara assumed. She gathered her breakfast and took an empty seat near her comrades, making sure to thank them for cleaning up after her departure.

“Don’t worry about it!” Nozomi smiled, giving a small wave of her hand. “And, Kurara… we’re all cheering for you, okay?” She said with a wink.

“T-There’s nothing to cheer for!” Kurara insisted. “Stop misunderstanding!”

Thankfully, her friends had chosen not to tease her further that morning. After a pleasant breakfast, they all went their separate ways for the day. Kurara went to the metal shop, still feeling light, and breezed through the allotted work for the day. If anything, she worked far too quickly. She had plenty of time to burn before dinner. 

Returning to her room to search for the movie Hiruko had recommended in advance had only taken ten or so minutes out of the several hours she had left to wait. For the first time she could recall, she had wished the previous combat had been just a little more taxing. If they had burned through more of their equipment, she’d have more to do. 

Just weeks ago, she had been yearning for this sort of reprieve, but now that it was here, she had no idea how to spend it. She wandered the halls, did extra training in the gym, browsed through the library… it felt like a week had passed by the time the sun began to set. If she only could have the luxury of being some sort of game protagonist that skipped through such sections with a single line of narration.

Dinner finally arrived, and she made her way to the cafeteria. All were present now, sans Hiruko and Takumi–who she assumed must be having a crazy good time today, and she felt some small measure of relief seeing that Darumi had joined the others. Not that she had expected otherwise, but… Well, in any case, she decided to have a light dinner and chose an assortment of snacks for tonight’s movie. After the two had finished eating, they left the cafeteria early–Kurara ignored the silent arm-pumping cheer Nozomi gave her as they walked out–ascended to Kurara’s room.

“You found more stuff?” Darumi asked as the title sequence played. “I don’t think I’ve seen this one before.”

“Sirei was hiding a veritable mountain of films.” Kurara shook her head and sighed. “He claims to have simply forgotten to give them to us.”

Darumi hummed. “That does kinda sound like him, th–” Her sentence was cut off by the wet thuds of meat splashing onto the ground emitted by the projector. Someone in the movie had just had several far-too-realistic organs removed, some of them flying directly into the camera lens, leaving the shot obscured by blood. “Oh-ho-ho-ho MAN! Look at that!” Darumi jumped straight up from the couch and excitedly pointed at the screen. “Practical effects! They don’t make ‘em like this anymore!”

They certainly didn’t, Kurara thought to herself. This movie was already several levels beyond her tolerance. She tried to focus on thinking about how the effects were made, but the filmmakers did far too good of a job. The gritty execution had been masterful, lacking all the hallmarks of weak, computer generated effects. The movie was an absolute gore-fest through and through, what little plot there was there seemingly just to justify the filmmaker’s singular skill of making realistic gore. The one advantage Kurara had was that Darumi couldn’t tell if she closed her eyes.

Darumi shrieked in laughter at one gruesome scene. “Look back there!” She pointed to the singular corner of the screen not covered in viscera. “The actor’s slipping on all the corn syrup they’re using!” Kurara forced herself to look, and Darumi was right. One of the characters had been slipping all over the fake blood in a way that did not look scripted. He even seemed to laugh at one point. It was enough to get a small laugh out of Kurara herself.

It was, frankly, a relief when the credits rolled. Darumi, for her part, was still ranting about the final scene. “How’d they even do that?!” She screamed, laughing, “They totally tore that dude apart without any cutaways! That’s some real movie magic there!”

“It was… impressive.” Kurara choked out. She had meant it, too. The creators of that film were truly in a league of their own, even if only in one, very specific area.

“I’m surprised, though.” Darumi’s voice a little more serene than before. “This seems like it would have been too extreme for you, Kurara.”

Something about hearing Darumi say her name gave her a little jolt of strength. “An Oosuzuki… can handle… much worse… than that.” She still struggled to speak, trying to choke down waves of nausea.

“It’s alright.” Darumi was quieter than before. “You don’t have to force yourself.” She stood and stretched. “Welp, time for bed!” She said in her typical manic tone, heading for the door. “See you later, princess!”

“...t-tomorrow…!” Kurara managed to speak before Darumi could leave. “After dinner…” The word made her stomach churn. She didn’t want to think of anything even adjacent to the concept of food.

Darumi seemed to freeze, shock clear on her face for more than just an instant. “A-Are you sure…?”

All Kurara could manage was a nod.

“W… Well, alright!” A hint of genuine excitement colored Darumi’s voice. “See you tomorrow!”

As soon as the door snapped shut, Kurara sank to the floor, her mask tumbling from her head. She was covered in a cold sweat. She should not have, under any circumstances, watched that final scene. Though, she made a mental note to herself: once they returned to the Artificial Satellite, she would find that director and make him tell her exactly how they did that scene.

It took some time for the nausea to pass. Once finally freed from the churning of her stomach, she showered and went to bed, trying to keep images of gore out of her mind. The movie, while technically impressive, had been horrid otherwise. The only positive was that Darumi seemed to have been having the time of her life watching it. 

Tomorrow would be better, she assured herself. Even if it was another gorefest movie, she’d be more mentally prepared for it this time. 

Night turned to day. Training turned to breakfast. Work turned to free time. Free time turned to impatience.

“Really, though,” Darumi looked a little concerned when she finally sat next to Kurara before the next movie. “You don’t gotta put on another gore flick if you don’t want to.”

“It’ll be fine.” Kurara assured her. “I actually read the synopsis this time.”

“Ohh, smart move!” Darumi leaned back in her seat, arms in the air. “So what’re we in for this time?”

“Frankly, I have no idea.” Kurara shrugged. “It didn’t sound super violent though, so sorry if it’s boring.”

“Hey, I like stuff besides horror and gore, y’know!” Darumi snickered to herself, a wide grin forming on her face. “Like erotic movies!” She laughed.

She’s just joking, Kurara reminded herself before she reflexively responded with a ‘me too’. At least, Kurara was pretty sure she was joking. Actually, the more she thought on it, she probably wasn’t joking. Maybe she should have agreed? Opportunity lost, she pressed the play button.

The movie was significantly different than anything they had watched up to this point. A mixed-media arthouse movie, the plot and characters were somewhat hard to follow. As far as Kurara could tell, the lead character was a noblewoman bound by family and duty to choose a spouse–a pain Kurara could relate to deeply. While the plot seemed to be about a web of political intrigue initially, the majority of the movie revolved around the noblewoman’s interactions with a mysterious suitor, whose appearance and media style was never the same between any two scenes. Regardless, the noblewoman somehow always recognized them no matter what form they appeared in. 

The movie was a tragedy, however, as while the noblewoman often soliloquized about the suitor, she never truly made an attempt to find out who they really were. The suitor, for their part, died in a way as mysterious as their identity, the film implying that they had accomplished some self-sacrificial goal in the process. The noblewoman was wed to one of the minor noble characters, her last lines in the film being those of regret.

“Man, I love a good tragedy, but…” Darumi sank into her seat. “That was kinda bleak.”

“Yeah…” Kurara crossed her arms. “Dealing with bland ass nobodies trying to marry you just for political gain… I can relate to that too well.”

“The poor mysterious suitor!” Darumi cried. “In the end, no one ever saw them for who they really were!”

“That damn noblewoman!” Kurara threw her arms in the air, stomping the ground as she did so. “She was clearly in love with the mysterious suitor! She should have just said something!”

“They could have trusted the noblewoman!” Darumi sobbed. “They should have shown her their true self!”

The two fell silent for a few moments, the credits fully ending leaving the room completely dark.

 “...wanna watch another tomorrow?” Kurara asked.

“You know it, princess!” Darumi’s voice no longer carried any trace of the crying she had been doing just moments before. The two parted. Once alone, Kurara reflected on how the movie hadn’t seemed like something she would have expected Darumi to enjoy, yet she seemed to have a good time. Or, as good as one could have while watching a tragedy, at least. 

Hiruko must have known Darumi’s tastes far better than Kurara had assumed. The thought made her a little jealous, for some reason. Just a bit. Not enough to dwell on, surely. Kurara showered and went to bed, trying so hard not to think about it that she accomplished the complete opposite.

The next day came and went, with Kurara spending much of her time wishing that days could pass as quickly as a sentence in a narrative or a movie’s screen wipe. She had been the first in the cafeteria that evening, sitting down with yet another light meal, already having prepared some snacks for after.

“Well, well, Kurara,” Yugamu said as he sat next to her, an infuriating grin on his face. “Here early, I see. Got somewhere to be later?” 

“I do have a prior engagement, yes.” Kurara replied simply, turning away from Yugamu.

“So,” Nozomi arrived, setting down her own assortment of food, “things are going well with Darumi?”

“There’s nothing to be ‘going well’!” Kurara insisted again. “Stop misunderstanding!”

“I believe in you, Kurara!” Nozomi cheered. She looked so enthusiastic that she might as well have been waving tiny Kurara flags while wearing a KURARA’S #1 FAN hat. There was clearly no getting through to her. 

Kurara spent her short meal ignoring Yugamu’s teasing and dodging Nozomi’s questions before excusing herself.

She returned to her room and impatiently scrolled through the projector’s file list. After what must have been several minutes of nonstop scrolling, she found the next movie from Hiruko’s list and selected it. Before she could read the synopsis, her doorbell rang.

“It’s open!” She called. The door swung open, and Darumi strode in with a pile of snacks in her arms. She bounced across the room and plopped herself next to Kurara, scattering her evening’s choice of treats across the table. Kurara started the movie.

It was surprisingly straightforward at first. Normal characters in normal places doing normal things. The pacing and framing gave it the air of a casual romance movie. Had Hiruko made a mistake and written down the wrong name? Had Kurara made an error and picked something with a similar name? It did not take long for Kurara to understand. The furtive glances… the lingering touches… the longing gazes… this wasn’t any typical romance movie. Kurara gulped.

It was a lesbian romance movie.

Panic began to set in. What the hell was Hiruko thinking?! Surely she understood what sort implications this had! Kurara sat absolutely still, back rigid, eyes locked onto the screen in front of them. What should she do? Should she say “oops, wrong movie” and pick a different one? Would that look weird? Would that make Darumi think that she didn’t like her? Did she want Darumi to think that? What had this entire relationship even been about, anyway?
Oh, right. Kurara had just wanted to ask her about that weird look. She had completely forgotten. Should she do it now? It felt sort of inappropriate. 

Kurara had broken out into a cold sweat, so nervous she was vibrating in her seat. Just end already! She begged. She’d just play it cool, she decided as she gripped the edge of her seat. Just don’t mention it at all. It’s just a decent movie. She realized that she hadn’t been paying attention for quite a while. She blinked and refocused her attention on the movie. What she saw was the bare back of one actress as she climbed on top of the other. It was in the middle of a sex scene.
Why?! She screamed internally again and again. Why?! Why?! Why?! Why?!

Her brain was frying. She felt so nervous that she was sick to her stomach. Every moment had been agonizing. The scene passed and the movie continued, but the anxiety remained. She felt like crying. Please, just let it end already…

The movie finally, finally came to an end. The credits scrolled past and both girls were silent. The credits ended and the room went dark. “Um…” Darumi was the first to speak, her voice hesitant and small. “T-That movie… were you… trying to say–”

“H-Hiruko recommended it.” The words shot out of Kurara’s mouth. “She gave me a list of movies…”

“Mistress Hiruko did?” Something in Darumi’s tone had changed. Kurara was too terrified to look. Eventually Darumi stood and slowly walked to the door. She hesitated, gripping the handle. “I… don’t think we should do this again. Thanks for spending so much time with me.”

The door opened. Get up, Kurara yelled at herself. Stop her. Say something! Do something! Anything! She remained frozen on the spot. 

This is your last chance! She shrieked inwardly. 

Darumi stepped past the threshold and closed the door behind her.

Kurara blinked. 

That’s it, then. She spent several minutes in that spot, unmoving. It was late. It was time to get ready for bed. Mechanically, she rose from her seat. Her mask went tumbling to the floor, her clothing plopping on the ground. She entered the shower. The hot water hit her face. Her legs gave way. She collapsed on the spot, curling into a ball. “Stupid…” She choked out through tears, again and again. “Stupid… stupid…”

The water had run cold by the time Kurara stood and left the shower. She crawled into bed, exhausted. She would just sleep and move on with her life. It was that simple. She closed her eyes and waited. Time passed. She rolled onto her other side and waited. Time passed. Her mind wandered again and again to the night of the fireworks. What was the point now? What did it matter? She no longer had the energy to shut off her own thoughts. It’s not like she hadn’t been aware of what she was doing, avoiding those memories. She knew, but did it anyway. A reflexive form of self-defense, one that she was now too tired to maintain. But why did these memories occur to her again now? Now, they only hurt.

Kurara remembered being out of breath, lying on her back in a grassy spot of the yard. The bonfire was raging, and she could feel the distant waves of heat sliding across the skin of her exposed face. Darumi, who had been chasing her, had also fallen to the ground nearby. Kurara could hear her laugh between gasps of air. It wasn’t Darumi’s regular shrill and psychotic laugh. It was… normal. She giggled like a child. Kurara had never heard her sound like that before. Kurara hadn’t realized that Darumi could even sound like that to begin with.

She liked how Darumi sounded, in that moment. Kurara smiled, despite herself. She let her neck relax and her head fall to the side, watching Darumi laugh for a few moments. Darumi eventually opened her eyes and looked towards Kurara. Their eyes met. Kurara flushed and looked away.

No, this wasn’t it. Earlier…

Earlier, as the bonfire had started, she announced that she would return to the building for a moment. Darumi stood in front of the doorway, a lit sparkler in hand. “Not so fast, princess!” She yelled. “The mask stays off tonight!” Kurara tried to avoid her, but Eva, having heard Darumi’s cry, grabbed a sparkler herself and joined in.

“You do not require that horrid thing, Miss Oosuzuki.” She stated while blocking her attempts to get around Darumi.

And so the chase began, the three of them circling the bonfire until they were out of breath. “Fine!” Kurara panted. “Fine…!” She fell to the ground.

No, not this either. Earlier, earlier…

Fireworks displays in the TRC had generally been pretty limited. Even with all the Oosuzuki’s endless wealth, there was only so much one could do about the limitations of fireworks in a totally enclosed space. Here, though, there were no such limitations, and Takumi had spared no expense. She would come to consider this the second-best fireworks display she had ever seen.

Within her memory, another memory occurred to her. She had remembered what Darumi had said just minutes before. “A waste of a very cute face.” She had remembered this line several times already. She became aware of Darumi, who had been standing next to her while the team watched the display. Kurara took her eyes off of the display and gingerly looked to the person standing next to her.

There, she saw Darumi with a gentle, genuine smile that Kurara had never seen her wear before. Framed by that smile, Kurara saw the glittering lights of the fireworks reflected in Darumi’s eyes. She considered this, then and now, to be the best fireworks display she had ever seen. 

She knew, then and now, that this was the moment that she had fallen in love.

In the present, staring at her blank ceiling in a dark room, it had seemed so obvious. She knew, she always knew, she just didn’t want to admit it to herself. She did not want to think of herself as the kind of person who would fall in love because of one genuine compliment from a pretty face, so she denied it to herself again and again. 

As she finally let the realization wash over her, she felt like a fool. Not because the thought had been correct, but because it had been, at least mostly, incorrect. If she hadn’t been so afraid of it, she would have realized it days ago.

It would be a lie to say that Darumi’s compliment had no effect, but it had been more like a seed or a spark. It would have simply faded away on its own, joining an endless sea of moments that could have been, but weren’t. What turned the spark into the warm feeling in her chest and the nagging feeling at the back of her mind was Darumi’s smile. When Kurara had seen it, she had been overcome with the feeling that she was seeing Darumi for the first time.

With that thought, every nagging feeling Kurara had experienced for the past several days hit her all at once, the impact of which caused her to sit straight up in bed. Each of Darumi’s disappointed looks, every time she spoke so softly that she sounded like someone else, the shock she had displayed every time Kurara invited her to watch movies together… those moments had been the real Darumi.

Kurara caught the sight of her mask on the floor where it had fallen from her head earlier. It was upside-down, its blank eyes and inverted empty smile boring straight through her. Kurara cradled her head in her hands.

 “She’s just like me.” 

It seemed so obvious to her now. Just like how Kurara wore her mask to project the personality expected of her, Darumi wore a mask to project a different personality as well. Suddenly, everything about how Darumi behaved, not only in the past several days, but since they met months ago, made sense.

Kurara’s mask was to appease her family, to project the idea of the rich heiress that she was expected to be, even if that idea clashed with and, at times, outright opposed who she really was inside.

Darumi’s mask, she supposed, was to push others away. To act morbid and distasteful so that others would keep their distance, and even those who still got close would remain at arm’s length. 

So who was Darumi, really? What was she like inside?

Kurara raised her head and looked again at her mask, still staring at her from across the room. By removing it, she could turn her projection off. She could be herself again, or at least, as much of herself that still remained. Even removed, its tendrils still clung to her mind. It was not a perfect mechanism by any means. 

If she could have lived without it… maybe things would have been different. If she did not need to rely on it, maybe she would have realized how she felt sooner. 

Maybe she would have realized, as the fireworks burst and popped above them, that she had fallen in love right then and there.

By keeping her mask and herself separate, Kurara had preserved as much of herself as she could. But, she thought to herself, what if her mask wasn’t physical? 

What if she could never just take it off? How much of her would have it consumed? 

How much of Darumi was still Darumi?

Failure enveloped her. Kurara pulled her knees to her chest and buried her face in them. In a way, the two of them might have been better equipped to understand each other than anyone else. Kurara did not know Darumi’s exact circumstances, but she did know the kind and severity of circumstances it took to make a person become a mask. 

She fell back onto her bed, curling into a ball and covering herself with her blanket entirely. She had failed worse than she could have thought, not only romantically, but simply as a friend. She should have realized this sooner, and tried to understand Darumi better. She owed that to her, simply as someone who could understand what she had been going through.

Maybe, Kurara realized, that was why Darumi had acted the way she had that night. Maybe that’s why she stopped Kurara from wearing her mask again. Maybe that’s why she looked so disappointed when Kurara was wearing it again the next day, and the day after that.

If only she had realized sooner. 

If only her mask had consumed a little less of her. 

If only, if only…

Exhaustion finally took its toll. Night turned to day. Kurara awoke, having far missed her early morning training time. She crawled out of bed, got ready, and shuffled out the door. She spent the day avoiding everyone she could. She ate breakfast in the metal shop and worked in silence. When dinner came, she simply collected her food long before anyone else could arrive and took it to her room. She stared at the wall in front of her, barely touching her food. 

In some twisted form of self-punishment, she flipped the projector on and hit play, turning the movie from the previous night on again. She told herself that she could just pay attention this time and at least see what the movie had been about. She took her mask off so she could see clearly.

It struck her then just how much more of the world she could see without it. She could not just see the entire screen projected on her blank wall, but most of her room as well. If someone had been sitting next to her, she easily could have seen them in her periphery. She would have been able to see when they leaned forward, when they cheered, when they grabbed a snack, when they yawned, when they cried. 

If only she hadn’t been wearing her mask. If only her mask had consumed a little less of her.

She recalled what Hiruko had said. “Be kind to her.” 

Kurara clicked her tongue. She had not been kind. It was not that she had been mean, either. She simply had not been anything at all, somehow both denying her thoughts and feelings while being too absorbed in them. If Darumi had not made herself, her own thoughts and feelings known to Kurara, then she could have easily just not have been there at all. How much of what Kurara had seen even been the real Darumi? She wished that she could have known. If only…

She found herself watching the movie’s credits, again, having failed to intake anything that actually happened. The night time announcement played. Kurara stood, showered, and went to bed. Night turned to day. She awoke, again, too late to go training. 

Her growling stomach feeling like the only part of her that was still alive, she trudged through the halls and down the stairs. Something collided with her. She looked up, seeing that she somehow just walked straight into Gaku, knocking him over.

“Hey!” Her projection performed now as a necromancer, puppeting her body for her. “Watch where you’re going, peasant!”

“Oh great,” Gaku stood, rubbing his head. “Now you’re gonna bite my head off too, aren’t you?”

Kurara growled. “If someone bit your head off, I bet you deserved it!”

“I didn’t even do anything!” Gaku protested. “I just sat down with my lunch and all of the sudden, Darumi starts crying and screaming at me!”

“Darumi…?” Kurara felt the faintest bit more alive, if only to be pissed off at Gaku for making her cry. “What the hell did you do?!”

“Seriously!” Gaku held up his hands in surrender. “I was just feelin’ a sort of dry stew vibe, so I got some steak, carrots and potatoes for lunch. Then she starts crying!” He looked away. “This is just my rotten luck…”

Kurara had tuned out the moment he had said ‘potatoes’. “You idiot!” She yelled and she started walking past him, down the stairs. “Those are curry ingredients!”

“So what?” He shrugged. “It’s not like we can run out!”

“That’s not the point, you moron!” She shouted up the stairs. Nearly sprinting, she proceeded to the cafeteria. It was empty, unsurprising for the late morning hour. She dispensed ingredient after ingredient from the Ration-O-Matic, as well as some quickly and easily digestible food for herself. 

She set to work, feeling like a fool again. Not because of what she missed, or how long it took her to realize her own feelings, but because of how easily she gave up and spent a whole day moping around. 

Who the hell did she think she was? Takumi?!

She was unsure why that comparison felt so apt, but decided it wasn’t worth thinking about. There were more important things to do. She carefully examined each herb and spice, selecting only the best and then grinding them by hand. Kurara, frankly, needed much more time to make a roux than she had available, but she resolved to make do. She would make it work.

One of the first things her mask took from her was her ability to just be plainly honest. She knew that, no matter how much she scripted or rehearsed the words she wanted to say, she could never be sure how they would come out in the moment. 

Mask or not, at this point, if what she wanted to say weren’t the exact words expected of the scion of the Oosuzukis, then they would fall apart. Her mask, however, could not take her actions. Tonight, she was going to talk to Darumi one more time. She resolved to try to communicate plainly and honestly, and failing that, her curry would speak for her. Completing the roux, she stored it in the deepest, coldest part of the fridge to set. She didn’t have the full day she normally wanted, so she had to make do. 

It was a little past lunch when Yugamu approached her. “We missed you this morning,” he said with a smile. “Yesterday, too. We were worried.”

“Sorry.” Kurara spoke quickly, grating as many apples as she could. “I’m kind of busy.”

“I can see that,” his voice hadn’t changed but his face was growing serious. “You know, no one has seen Darumi, either.”

Kurara paused for a moment, then continued wordlessly grating.

Yugamu sighed. “I’m sorry. I should have told you this the other day, but I wasn’t sure what was going on.”

“Told me what?” Kurara inquired without looking up.

“When I saw Darumi leave your room the other day.” He folded his arms, looking grim. “She didn’t realize I was there. She looked quite conflicted…” He shook his head. “She started to cry.”

Kurara dropped the apple and grater, grabbing Yugamu by his collar. “Why the hell didn’t you say anything?!”

“Well, to be honest,” Yugamu shrugged, holding his hands up in surrender, “I thought you were just mean to her. However, when we spoke the next day, what you said didn’t really match up. I wasn’t sure what to think.”

Kurara released him from her grip and returned to her work. There wasn’t enough time to stop.

“Do you…” Yugamu hesitated. “...have any idea why that happened?”

Kurara grated the apple harder and faster. “Because I–” She grit her teeth, her grip growing tighter around the apple. “--am a–” Her arm shook faster and faster. “--complete moron!!”

“Kurara!” Yugamu’s hand snapped across the counter between them, pulling Kurara’s hand from the grater. What small amount of apple remained collapsed under her grasp. “Look,” he said in a calm voice, “I don’t know what’s going on, and I won’t pry. What I do know, though–” He released her arm. “--is that you won’t be able to finish this curry if you grate your fingers into it.”

Kurara took a deep, shuddering breath. “I don’t have enough time.”

Yugamu gave a serene smile. “Tell me what I can do.”

Kurara paused for a moment, looking at the tips of her fingers that very nearly got shredded from her body. “Cut all the beef into exactly one inch squares.”

Yugamu stepped around the counter, pulling an apron from a nearby hangar and a knife from the magnetic board against the wall. “You got it.”

“...and… thank you.” She muttered. He smiled in return, so he must have heard it. Kurara then dispensed some chocolate, much more than she would normally use, and began shaving it into small bits so it melt quickly and evenly into the dish. She knew Darumi liked sweet food, so she was going to make this curry as sweet as she could. Or, rather, sweet as she could without completely destroying the flavor profile. She was going to have to get inventive.

Yugamu remained for some time, cutting meat and vegetables to Kurara’s exact specifications. It was shortly before dinner when Nozomi arrived, asking the same sorts of questions Yugamu had. Apparently everyone but Kurara herself had been aware of how she felt, and everyone could sense that something had gone wrong when nobody had saw either Kurara or Darumi the previous day.

Kurara sighed. Something about Nozomi was so disarming that it made her feel like she could speak freely, even through her mask. Sometimes, at least. “I should have listened to you.”

“What do you mean?” Nozomi tilted her head.

“If I just listened to you instead of denying everything,” Kurara shook her head, “I think things would have gone a lot different.”

Nozomi opened her mouth to speak, but a much louder voice cut her off. “Oh man, smells fuckin’ GOOD in here!” Takemaru strode through the door with a few others behind him.

Nozomi turned back to look at Kurara. “I’ll take care of them, okay? Just keep focused!”

Kurara nodded and returned to her work, slowly cooking the fattiest parts of the meat so she could get the exact ratio she wanted for the overall dish. She didn’t even protest when she heard Nozomi describe it as “apology curry”. 

The others seemed to have understood and left it at that. Well, all the others except Gaku, who loudly complained about not getting any curry.

Night had fallen by the time the curry was complete. It tasted… unique. Not bad, but not the type of curry she would have made in any typical circumstance. She would have liked to have the time to really break down its flavor profile, but there simply wasn’t time. 

Kurara was only able to complete it before the night announcement played due to the help of Yugamu preparing ingredients for her, and Nozomi fending off any distractions that would have come her way. She thanked them as profusely as her own mask would allow her.

Kurara took a deep breath, observing the stack in front of her. A pot of her newly patented sweet curry, a container of freshly cooked rice, a dish and appropriate utensils. Steeling herself, she hefted them into her arms and began the trek upstairs. She still hadn’t decided on exactly what she wanted to say. Nozomi had told her to just be as true and honest to her feelings as possible, and not worry about the specifics. Kurara supposed that she had no other choice at this point.

Once on the roof, Kurara took a small detour before approaching Darumi’s door. Instead, she went to her own door. She gently rested the curry on the step, grabbed the handle with a shaking hand and pulled the door open. With her other hand, she ripped her mask from her head and whipped it into the farthest reaches of her room. She slammed the door behind it. 

All this time, Darumi had been trying to show herself bit by bit. Kurara meant to respond in kind.

She arrived at Darumi’s door and swallowed. The feel of the cool night air against her exposed face made her exceptionally nervous. The conversation she was about to have made her even more nervous. She wanted to run away, though she knew she’d never forgive herself if she did. 

With a shaking hand, she pressed the doorbell.

There was no response.

She pressed it again. And again. And again and again and again and again. She felt the mask’s tendrils creep through her brain and, in her frustration, kicked the door. She hit the doorbell again. She considered just breaking it down entirely. 

The door suddenly swung open. “What the FU–” Darumi stopped. Whoever she had been expecting to yell at had clearly been taller than Kurara, because her sightline was starkly above her head. Darumi looked down. “K… Kurara?”

Kurara felt meek suddenly, her face flushing. “I… I made you some food.” She lifted the pot in her arms slightly.

Darumi blinked, seemingly not knowing what to say. She stepped aside, allowing Kurara in. Once inside, Kurara set the pot on Darumi’s mess of a table and paused for a moment. She took a deep breath and turned to face Darumi. Even in this dim light, she could see that Darumi had the red and swollen eyes of someone who had probably spent the entire day crying.

“L-Last time…” Kurara swallowed, her mouth having gone completely dry. “I… I didn’t know what I was trying to say.” She placed a hand over her chest, as if it would somehow help her pounding heart. “I do, now. If you’ll hear it.”

Darumi stood silent, herself noticeably swallowing. Kurara took that silence as approval to proceed.

“I want…” Kurara took a breath, reaching deep into her heart for whatever words coalesced there. “...to know you.”

“What,” Darumi looked away, forcing a half smile. “like, carnally?”

Kurara had the distinct feeling that answering that question honestly would result in the conversation going in a direction much different than what she was currently aiming for, so she chose to bypass it. 

“I-I’m serious.” She took a step forward, closing the distance between them slightly. “The other day, I panicked. I hadn’t considered how you felt… or how I felt, even. I’ve done nothing but think about it since.” She took another step forward, looking Darumi directly in the eyes. Darumi took a step back. “I genuinely want to know you, Darumi.” Kurara took another step forward. “The real you.”

“You don’t want–” Darumi stepped back yet again, looking away. Kurara saw some part of her facade crumble. 

She could recognize the look on Darumi’s face because it was the same look she knew she wore every time she took her mask off–the look of someone having a secret exposed. 

“I-I mean… you already know me… I–”

Sensing an incoming deflection, Kurara took another step forward. “I want to know the person who saved my life in our last battle.”

Darumi stepped back again, bumping into the wall behind her. “C-Come on, it’s not like we can actually die…” 

“I want to know the person who laughed in the grass,” Kurara stepped forward, the distance between the two closing more and more, “the person who chased me with sparklers so I wouldn’t wear my mask,” she took another step, “the person who looked so sad when I wore it again the next day,” another step. There was nearly no distance between them now. “The person who looked happy when she was invited to watch movies.” Kurara took the slightest step forward again, closing the distance almost as far as she could. 

She stared up into Darumi’s eyes, their noses almost touching. She could see that Darumi had been trembling, and she could feel the warmth of her breath. She could see how flushed Darumi’s face was. “I want to know the beautiful person I saw, smiling under the fireworks.”

Kurara hesitated, suddenly aware of herself. Her head was spinning and her face felt like it was on fire. The instant the flow of her emotions began to ebb, she gained a sudden, intense awareness of herself. She remained there for a moment, staring deep into Darumi’s eyes. Temptation tugged at her, urging her to move forward those last few centimeters. She felt her own lips part slightly in anticipation. She could see the same anticipation in Darumi’s eyes.

Kurara took a step back, the slight movement making her light-headed. “That’s all.”

Darumi remained frozen against the wall, her eyes transfixed on Kurara. Kurara continued, “If you don’t want to speak to me again, I understand.” She headed for the door and placed her hand on the handle. She hesitated for a moment. “If you do, though…” She cast a look over her shoulder back at Darumi, who still hadn’t moved. “I won’t wear my mask… if you won’t wear yours.” Kurara left, the memory of where she had been still pinning Darumi to the wall.

Kurara returned to her room. A strange mix of relief and worry washed over her. Having been, at least partially, honest about her feelings had left her feeling unburdened. At the same time, however, had she gone too far? Once everything had begun spilling out, she barely left Darumi room to speak. 

No, she told herself as she took a deep breath, it doesn’t matter now. What’s done is done. She told Darumi the truth, and now it was simply up to Darumi to decide whether or not she wanted to be known. Kurara could not blame her either way. She knew exactly how terrifying it is to be known, after all. 

She resolved to not dwell on it any further.

Some minutes later, Kurara had her face, flushed completely red, buried in her hands as she made a tiny frustrated cry. Their faces had been so close to each other. Should she have kissed her? She should have kissed her. She should have kissed her! No, she reassured herself as she prepared for bed, she hadn’t gone there to seduce her. She just wanted to tell her the truth. That things got a little intense was simply… unintentional.  It was fine. 

She lay in her bed with her eyes firmly shut. It was fine. In fact, it’s better that she didn’t. It was better that she did not tangle any more emotions into it, that she gave Darumi room to think on her own. Knowing that, however, did not stop her from thinking about what it would have been like. Just a little bit. Throughout the night.

Eventually night turned to day. Kurara’s alarm woke her in time for gym training. I should have kissed her, she thought immediately. 

She shook off the thought and headed out, hesitating only briefly as she passed Darumi’s room, the lights still out and door still closed. The moment she entered the gym, Moko and Nozomi rushed forward, grabbing either of her hands. Yugamu followed behind them, shrugging with a smile on his face.

“Yugamu and Nozomi told me everything!” Moko shook Kurara’s arm vigorously enough to qualify for today’s exercise. “How’d it go?”

Nozomi, for her part, was asking similar questions simultaneously with Moko. “Did it go okay, Kurara? Is everything okay?”

“Wh–, hey, lemme–” Kurara couldn’t find room to speak as she was being tugged back and forth. “Just! Let me talk!”

The two released her hands and waited with bated breath, stars in their eyes.

“I just… gave her the curry and told her how I felt.” She looked away. “That’s all.”

“That’s all?!” Moko repeated incredulously. “What’d she say?”

“W-Well…” Kurara shrank slightly. “She didn’t say anything. I left after that.”

“Oh…” Moko’s face fell. “Girl. ”

“What did you tell her?” Nozomi’s head tilted.

“That I–” Kurara gulped, trying to figure out how to escape this interrogation. She crossed her arms and looked away. “I want to know her better.”

“That’s it?” Yugamu sounded surprised. “Was this not about communicating romantic feelings?”

“The romance was implied!” Kurara stomped.

“Oh, I see,” Yugamu cupped his chin, and smiled an extremely self-satisfied smile. “Never thought we’d see the day that Kurara admitted romantic feelings out loud.”

Kurara froze. She had just done exactly that, she realized. “You–!” She took a single, stomping step towards Yugamu.

“Now, now…” Nozomi placed a soothing hand on Kurara’s shoulder. “I think you did the right thing, Kurara. Darumi seems…” Nozomi paused for a few moments too long. “...complicated. She probably needs time to think.”
Kurara was unsure exactly how diplomatic Nozomi was being with her word choice, but she could not refute the accuracy of it in the end. She sighed, and shrugged. “Can we get to training now?”

The four of them split to their respective sets of equipment. As they began their stretches, Yugamu spoke up. “I do have one question, if you don’t mind, Kurara.”

Kurara gave another deep sigh. “Fine. What is it?”

“Forgive me if this comes off as rude, but…” Yugamu paused, searching for the best way to phrase his question. “Why Darumi? You don’t seem to have very much in common.”

“No! We’re…” Kurara unconsciously reached a hand towards her mask. For most of her life now, it had been an extension of her body, but now, whenever she thought about Darumi… it felt the slightest bit foreign. Like, perhaps, it did not belong there anymore. “...not so different, after all.”

“I see.” Yugamu’s courteous smile returned. “Well, far be it from me to question love!”

Though their teasing had annoyed her to no end, Kurara was somewhat thankful. She felt a little less distracted and a little less on edge, now. 

Nozomi’s words also reassured her. It was the right move to give Darumi space. If she chose to not reach out again, then… well, Kurara would definitely be sad, but she could live knowing that she had at least told her the truth, in her own way.

The group ate breakfast together and then parted, Kurara proceeding to the metal shop to work. Again, she found herself wishing that the last battle had been a heavier drain on their resources. She simply didn’t have enough to do to pass the time. 

She spun around in her chair, wandered the halls, made small talk, and still not enough time had passed. Maybe, she thought, she should have given Darumi a clear way to reject her. Kurara did not know for how long she could bear this period of limbo.

After what simply must have been a decade of waiting, dinner arrived. She, as had become usual, ate quickly, and left early. Nozomi’s typical wordless thumbs up and wink combo felt a little more encouraging than it had the previous days. 

Kurara felt apprehensive as she climbed the stairs. There was no guarantee that Darumi would visit today, after all. Or ever again, for that matter. At least, she thought as she opened her door, within her own room she had to maintain no sense of decorum. Her door clicked behind her and she exhaled a breath she hadn’t realized that she had been holding. 

She took two steps into her room, still deciding if she should flop onto her couch or her bed, when her doorbell rang. Her heart launched straight into her throat. Within a second, she had spun around and pulled her door open. 

Darumi stood on the other side, her hand still hovering over the bell’s button. She looked uncharacteristically bashful. “H… Hey…” She greeted Kurara with a quiet voice.

“H-Hey…” Kurara stammered in return.

“You, uh…” Darumi rubbed her arm and glanced away. “...wanna hang out?”

“Yes!” Kurara said far too enthusiastically. “I-I mean… yeah.” She corrected with the smoothness of a quarry. She lead Darumi into her room, and Darumi took what had become her spot on the couch. 

Before joining her, Kurara first took several deep, shuddering breaths, and pulled off her mask, placing it on the desk. She made sure the face of the mask was looking at the wall. She joined Darumi on the couch. 

Kurara noticed that, maybe by just a bit, Darumi was sitting closer to her than she normally had. The two were silent for some time.

Darumi suddenly yelled in frustration. “This is so damn hard!” She threw her hands into the air. “I should’ve just gotten drunk or something! Then I coulda just spilled my guts all over the floor!” Her hands slammed back down to her sides.

Kurara swallowed and shifted to be ever so slightly closer to Darumi. She leaned towards her and reached out, hand trembling, placing just a few of her fingers on top of Darumi’s hand. She immediately flushed at the feeling of her skin. 

Darumi jumped violently in surprise, turning to face Kurara, her face also tinting red. She did not withdraw her hand. “I’ll wait,” Kurara choked out a whisper, forcing herself to maintain eye contact. Darumi nodded slightly, before looking away and staring very pointedly at a spot on the floor. 

Nigou damn well better have made her floor spotless, Kurara thought to herself.

“I guess,” Darumi finally broke the silence, “you were right about me. About,” she vaguely waved through the air in front of her face. “wearing a mask.” She fell silent for some time before speaking again. “It’s… easier for me, to be hated rather than liked.” Darumi tucked her arms under her chest and seemed to shrivel on the spot.

 “The killing games, the morbid and inappropriate jokes… I do like those things, but…” She shook her head. “I know other people don’t, so… the volume gets all turned up. All the things that I know others don’t like get so loud in my head. The more… uncomfortable it is… the louder it gets.” She sighed in frustration. “This doesn’t make any sense. What I’m trying to say is…” 

Darumi turned to look Kurara in the eyes, a sad, serene smile on her face. “I am my mask. I can’t just take it off like you do.” She looked away again. “I don’t even know who I really am, anymore. So… I’m sorry, but… I can’t…” She started to stand. “I can’t take it off like you want, so I should just–”

Kurara remembered the last movie they watched. She remembered the feeling she had as she watched Darumi exit her room. She knew that this time, that feeling was right. If she let Darumi leave, she really would be gone forever.

 “Wait!” She cried, clasping Darumi’s hand before she could get up. She couldn’t tell which of their hands was trembling. Perhaps it was both. “Y-You can still figure it out,” Kurara stammered, staring at their clasped hands, afraid to see what look was on Darumi’s face.

“I’m sorry, Kurara.” Darumi’s voice was barely a whisper. “I don’t think there’s a ‘real’ me left.” Hesitantly, she pulled her hand away from Kurara’s.

Tears burned at the corners of Kurara’s eyes. The thought of Darumi burying the Darumi she had seen for good was too much to bear. She couldn’t let Darumi leave yet. She… She still had something to say. Something she needed to say, not to Darumi’s mask, nor her deflections, but to the Darumi she had been glimpsing this whole time. “I’ll prove it.” The resolution in her voice surprised even herself.

Darumi stopped, looking back at Kurara, the light shrouding her face. “...how?” Kurara motioned to the couch and Darumi, slowly, lowered herself back into her seat.

“D-Darumi,” Kurara stammered, “I… li–... no, I’m in– I mean, I lo…” She swallowed, her throat clamping up every time she tried to speak. She couldn’t get the words out. She took a deep breath, looking up at Darumi. 

No, she realized, words would never work. She had to act. She leaned forward, starting a slow crawl to Darumi. “W-Without my mask… It’s so hard to talk…” She crept forward, closing the distance between them. “My words get all mixed up, but…” She climbed to Darumi, placing one leg over her lap, straightening her back so she sat a head taller than her. 

“If… if you don’t want to hear me, then…” She reached a hand to Darumi’s cheek. She realized now that it was hot and wet. “Just… push me away.” She waited a moment. Darumi made no effort to move, her eyes wide staring into Kurara’s own. Kurara tilted Darumi’s chin upwards, brushing her thumb against her cheek. She felt Darumi’s trademark makeup smudge. Kurara took a moment to appreciate Darumi’s face, frozen in shock and turmoil. She looked beautiful to her, even then. 

She leaned down and brought her lips to Darumi’s.

She kissed her again and again, as controlled and gentle as her trembling body would allow. She did it for long enough that she had just enough time to worry that maybe, Darumi hadn’t felt the same way. She almost pulled away. 

Darumi kissed her back. It was the last message Kurara needed to know that she was on the right path, that she could find her way past Darumi’s mask. She rested her hands on Darumi’s shoulders and kissed her again.

Darumi’s kisses grew faster, deeper, more fierce. She was like a starving animal in the desert who had just discovered an oasis. When she tried to intensify, Kurara pulled back, taking advantage of the moment to get a breath of air, and then kissed Darumi again, as gentle as she could. 

One of Darumi’s hands inched up Kurara’s leg, reaching up her skirt. The other was moving from her waist, up the side of her stomach. Both hands found themselves instead intertwined with Kurara’s fingers. 

Darumi squirmed slightly, not trying to escape, but not knowing what to do. Kurara’s gentle kisses smothered her. Eventually, the tension in her arms slackened. Darumi’s kisses became uneven. Kurara heard her sniffle.

Kurara opened her eyes just slightly in time to see a tear slide out from Darumi’s eyes, one after the other. Seeing this, she knew, she finally reached the real Darumi. She was the first person who had in a very, very long time. 

She released Darumi’s hands and wrapped her arms around her, pulling her in for the deep kiss they both craved. Darumi responded in kind, wrapping one hand around Kurara’s waist and the other finding its way through her hair. 

They kissed again and again until finally Darumi broke away, choking out a sob. She buried her face into Kurara’s shoulder, trembling as she clung to her and took several long, deep breaths. “Kurara, I…” She choked the words out, before pulling away and looking into Kurara’s eyes. “Could you… say it?”

“I…” Kurara swallowed. “I love you… Darumi.”

Something deep and ancient snapped apart within Darumi, the force of which so powerful that Kurara could feel it reverberate through Darumi’s entire body. Darumi’s face twisted, tears spilling freely, before she clung as tightly as she could to Kurara, burying her face in her chest. 

All Kurara could do was stroke Darumi’s quaking back as she wailed, Darumi’s clenching fists pulling Kurara’s clothing tight across her neck and chest. Kurara, surprising herself, felt no awkwardness or discomfort. 

Somehow she knew that, in another world with another set of circumstances, their positions could have easily been reversed. She knew too well the contradiction of needing to hide yourself, but wanting to be seen.

It took quite a while before Darumi calmed down. “You know,” Darumi eventually spoke, her voice raw and hoarse, “I’ve.. felt the same way for a while.”

“R… Really?”

Darumi nodded into her chest. “When we were in the grass… I turned and saw you smiling at me. I… think I knew then.”

Kurara flushed. So she had fallen in love first, then. She felt like she had lost in some small way, somehow. 

“I…” Kurara sighed. “I only figured it out three days ago.”

Darumi pulled away and looked up at her.

“Right after you left.”

Something about that made Darumi begin to chuckle. “Oh man,” she snickered, “what a tragedy that would have been.”

“S-So what?” Kurara snapped back. “We’re here now, so it’s fine.”

Darumi laughed to herself a little more, before looking up at Kurara again, her expression soft despite how red her eyes were. “Could you… kiss me again?”

Kurara acquiesced.

“Again?” Darumi pleaded, her voice regaining some of its usual energy.

Kurara relented.

“Kiss me again?” Darumi’s wide smile appeared again.
“Is that all you can think about?!” Kurara shot back.
“Oh, come on!” Darumi’s voice had returned to what sounded normal for her–or at least as normal as it could sound after at least an hour of full force ugly crying. “The cutest girl in the whole world is mending my broken heart with her soft, tender lips!” She wrapped her arms around Kurara’s neck. “How could I not ask for more?”

“Jeez…” Kurara flushed. “Fine.” They shared another kiss, this one much longer and deeper than the past two. They pulled apart and spent a moment looking into each other’s eyes, leaning in one more time when the school bell sounded and the night time announcement played.
“Oh my god!” Kurara growled. “Read the room!”

“Shut the hell up you goddamn AI!” Darumi shrieked.

The two laughed quietly. Darumi looked up at Kurara again, suddenly looking very bashful… and very small. “Um… Could I… stay over?”

Kurara flushed red, her body breaking out in a sudden sweat. Her response came out as an unintelligible squeak.

“I mean…” Darumi continued as if Kurara hadn’t attempted to speak at all. “I’ve… never felt this happy before, but,” she shifted deeper into Kurara’s arms, “it hurts. And I’m scared of how much it hurts. I-I don’t know… what I’ll do if I’m alone right now.”

Kurara felt a pang of guilt for her initial reaction. “O-Of course.” She shifted so the two of them could stand. “I’ll come with you to get your nightwear.”

“Huh?” Darumi tilted her head. “Oh, I don’t, uh… have any.”

Kurara was appalled. “Do you just… sleep in your clothes then?”

“Uhhh,” Darumi looked to the side, smirking a little. “Nnnope.”

Kurara stammered. “W–Wh…”

“Come onnn,” Darumi hugged Kurara, rubbing their cheeks together. “We’re young and in love!”

“At least get a shirt or something!” Kurara shouted. Eventually, Darumi relented, and the two of them went hand in hand down to the Gift-O-Matic to dispense something appropriate for Darumi to wear. On the way down, they decided to watch a movie before going to bed, and went further down to the cafeteria to get some snacks. Once they returned to Kurara’s room, Kurara insisted that they shower first before getting too comfortable. “I’ll be quick,” she assured Darumi as she stepped into the shower and activated the privacy glass. 

True to her word, it was likely the quickest shower she had ever taken in her life, worrying about what Darumi had said earlier about being alone. She asked Darumi about movies through the glass, and they got on the subject of the last movie they watched.

“You didn’t watch it?!” Darumi was dumbfounded. “But it was so good!”

“I-I was panicking!” Kurara stammered as she slipped on her nightgown and stepped out of the shower. “I couldn’t focus on it at all!”

Darumi gave a soft smile, the thing Kurara at this point had begun to associate with the realest possible Darumi. “Let’s watch it again.”

Kurara flushed, and nodded. “B-But go shower first! I’m not letting you in my bed otherwise!”

“Alright, alright,” Darumi shrugged, her arms in the air. “I’m goin’, I’m goin’.”

As she waited, Kurara reflected on everything that happened. She began to understand what Darumi meant about volume. 

For Kurara, her mask was more binary. On or off. For Darumi, it seemed to be more of a spectrum. Truth and projection intermingled at different amounts, different volumes, changing with every moment. Every spectrum had extremes, though, and that meant that there was a true, unfiltered, 100% Darumi in there somewhere. 

As she stole glance after glance at Darumi’s blurred figure through the privacy glass, she thought about finding that Darumi. She was determined to do so.

Darumi’s shower lasted longer than Kurara had expected. Kurara had begun to worry when the water finally ceased and Darumi exited, wearing seemingly only a shirt that was far, far too large for her. Her hair spilled out across the back and her face was clear of makeup.

Kurara became aware that she was seeing a version of Darumi that no one else had seen before, the thought of which made her face flush and her heart race. As a bonus, she also got an answer to the question of: was Darumi’s teeth pattern painted on, or a tattoo?

Darumi sat on the couch next to Kurara, first acting shy and hesitant. The two shifted closer to each other, and as soon as they first touched, Darumi clung to Kurara as if magnetized to her. Darumi’s on-and-off behavior had been much more than Kurara had expected, but… she didn’t dislike it either. 

Getting comfortable in each other, Kurara turned on the movie for the third time in the past several days, and actually watched it this time.

It was a lesbian love story about two mismatched individuals who, despite the odds and their constant mistakes, kept coming back to each other. It was a tug at your heartstrings romance that wasn’t clear about whether or not it was a tragedy until the end, when the protagonists finally declared their love for, and perhaps more importantly, their understanding of each other.

Kurara thought it was a good movie.