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“I’m exhausted,” Nuru groans, dropping onto the log next to Varian.
Across the fire, Hugo snorts. “Aren’t we all? Chasing down those thugs took a lot out of us.”
Varian only contributes a tired hum to the conversation, watching Yong play with Ruddiger and Olivia. Hugo keeps glancing over to them, fingers twitching like he wants to reach over and snatch Olivia back. But he doesn’t, and Varian smiles softly. A few months ago, he never would’ve even let Yong look at Olivia, much less play with her.
He’s opening up, whether he wants to admit it or not.
Hugo meets his gaze and raises an eyebrow in question. Varian’s face grows warm. When did his eyes stray to Hugo? He looks away quickly, only to find Nuru’s smug face staring back at him.
“What?” He asks.
She busies herself with smoothing out her already perfect dress. “Oh, nothing.”
Varian squints at her, but doesn’t push it. She’s been doing that a lot lately, where she’ll make a comment but never elaborate. She’ll smile like she knows something, but whenever someone asks she’ll brush it off and say “you’ll know when the time comes.”
Across the fire, Hugo stands and stretches. “Well this has been fun, but I need my beauty sleep. Good looks don’t just grow on trees, you know.”
Yong snorts. “Clearly.”
Hugo halfheartedly glares at the younger boy as Olivia squeaks and runs up to the blond’s shoulder. “I’m going to pretend that wasn’t an attempt to insult me, Firecracker.”
Yong looks up innocently. “What, me? I’d never.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” Hugo ruffles Yong’s hair before saying a soft “goodnight” to Varian. He sticks his tongue out at Nuru before disappearing into his tent, and she responds by flipping him off.
“I’d better turn in too,” Nuru says not long after.
Yong looks up from where Ruddiger is rolling on his stomach. “We’re not stargazing tonight?”
She shakes her head and stands. “It’s too cloudy tonight, we’ll have to try tomorrow.”
Yong pouts. With one final scratch behind Ruddiger’s ears, he stands as well. “I guess I’ll go to bed, then. No point staying up now.”
“You could always stay up with me,” Varian offers, reaching into his bag by his feet to pull out his mother’s journal.
Yong makes a face. “Not if you’re going to be translating all night.”
“Your loss.”
Nuru rolls her eyes fondly and rests a hand on Varian’s shoulder. “Goodnight, V. Don’t stay up too late.”
“Uh huh,” Varian murmurs, already scanning the pages.
He hears the soft crunch of leaves indicating the other two walking away and vanishing into their respective tents. As the night sky grows darker and the shadows cast by the fire grow longer, Varian’s tent remains empty. Ruddiger stretches lazily by the log, curling his tail around himself and purring in contentment. Varian knows he should go to bed soon, and he will! Just as soon as he finishes this—
Huh.
Varian squints at the page. That’s… not right. If his translations are correct (which they should be), the next page should be directions towards the general area of the next trial. Varian should be jumping into one of his victory dances right now and preparing for the next leg of their journey.
But instead all he’s managed to do is translate his mother’s gibberish into more gibberish. It’s nothing but a messed up jumble of words that he hadn’t realized didn’t make sense until now.
Varian rubs his eyes and groans. He’s too tired for this, but he knows he’ll be up all night if he doesn’t at least try to figure this out. He needs a second pair of eyes.
With a sigh, Varian stands and makes his way over to Hugo’s tent. He can already imagine all the snarky things Hugo will have to say about Varian needing help translating his own mother’s work, but he supposes he can put his pride aside for once. And if Hugo becomes too unbearable, he’ll let Yong go a little crazy with the firecrackers next time he’s practicing with Hugo.
“Hey, Blondie,” Varian whispers. “I need your help.”
He hears shuffling from inside the tent, some murmuring that Varian can’t decipher. He rolls his eyes.
“Listen,” he continues, going to open the tent flap. “I know what you’re going to say, but I got to this one section that’s just—“ he stops in his tracks as he enters the tent.
Oh shit, he’s asleep.
Moonlight falls across Hugo’s face in a delicate way, illuminating the freckles sprinkled over his nose and cheeks. His glasses have been delicately set to the side next to Olivia, and his hair is down for once instead of in his usual ponytail. He looks vulnerable like this, almost innocent. Hugo looks beautiful.
Varian blinks rapidly. Whoa. Whoa, okay. Sleep deprivation must really be getting to him if he’s standing here thinking Hugo is beautiful.
He’s about to step back out when Hugo shifts again, and Varian notices the blond’s arms wrapped around something. His pillow, held close to his body like it’s something precious. Like he couldn’t bear to part with it.
Varian snorts. Hugo’s a hugger in his sleep? By the Sun, this is going to give him blackmail for days. If Nuru ever gets her hands on this information—
“Mom?”
Varian goes very, very still. Hugo’s eyes remain shut, but his peaceful expression is now gone. Instead his eyebrows are furrowed, lips pulled down into a distressful frown.
“Mom,” Hugo murmurs again, pulling the pillow closer to him. “Please wake up.”
Oh. He’s having a nightmare. Varian’s eyes widen. Should he wake him up? Probably, right? No one likes being trapped in a bad dream.
He steps forward, about to put his hand on Hugo’s shoulder when he pauses.
Here’s the thing. Hugo has a fragile ego. He knows this because Hugo likes to brush everything off and act like nothing bothers him, which is exactly how Varian knows that Hugo does care. He doesn’t like being vulnerable because he views vulnerability as weakness. If Varian wakes him up now, there’s no telling what kind of panicked reaction he’ll get.
But he can’t just not wake up Hugo. To leave him stranded in the confines of his own mind would be cruel to say the least.
He can’t wake up Hugo, but someone else can.
Peeking his head out of the entrance, Varian whistles softly. “Ruddiger! Hey, buddy!” The raccoon perks up and cocks his head to the side curiously. Varian waves him over, rolling his eyes as his companion waddles over without hurry.
“I need you to wake up Hugo,” he whispers. Ruddiger frowns at him and he sighs. “Look, I can’t explain it. I just need you to. Please?” His friend huffs and Varian is pretty sure he rolls his eyes. Can raccoons even do that?
Despite clearly not wanting to, Ruddiger crawls into the tent as Varian slips out as silently as possible. He puts out the fire and hurries over to his own tent, listening to the silence around him. From Hugo’s tent, he hears a muffled shriek.
“Oh,” he hears Hugo say, sounding relieved. “Just you.” Good, he’s awake.
Varian breathes a sigh of relief, about to slip into his tent when Hugo speaks again.
“Wait, why aren’t you with Varian?”
Ruddiger chitters and Varian hears more shuffling before the entrance to Hugo’s tent opens. Varian dives into his tent and pulls the blanket up to his neck, squeezing his eyes shut. A moment later he hears footsteps coming near, then the rustling of fabric. Paws skitter over to him and a wet nose is nuzzling his cheek, but he refrains from reacting.
It’s ridiculous honestly, how he feels like he was caught seeing something he shouldn’t have, but more so how far he’s willing to go to ensure Hugo’s stupid pride stays intact.
Never let it be said that Varian never does anything nice for that stupid thief.
Hugo, who sounds not too far away, lets out a huff that sounds somewhat like laughter.
“Idiot,” he murmurs. A second later there are fingers brushing the top of Varian’s head. What is he— “Of course you fell asleep with your goggles on.” He feels those same fingers gently slide the strap over his head and hears the soft sound of his goggles being placed on the ground. Varian expects Hugo to leave after that, but he doesn’t. In fact, his hand doesn’t leave Varian, instead brushing back a tendril of hair.
“Thanks,” he whispers, and for a moment Varian thinks Hugo is talking to him. “For waking me up.” Ruddiger chitters happily in reply as Hugo pulls his hand away.
There’s a heavy silence that follows the absence of Hugo’s touch, and Varian holds his breath. Did Hugo leave?
“Is he always so peaceful when he sleeps?”
Varian feels Ruddiger curl up under his chin and holds back a smile. Hugo hums.
“Must be nice.”
And then he leaves.
***
Varian decides he hates the rain. Not nearly as much as he despises snow of course, but it’s pretty high on his list of Things To Avoid.
He’s cold and he’s drenched . He feels like a wet cat and by the Sun he misses Corona. At least whenever it rained in Corona, it was warm. The rain felt welcoming, especially when the sun still shined through. Rapunzel loved sunshowers, always loved how the raindrops felt like a million warm little kisses. She was the reason Varian used to love the rain.
This rain is not like that at all . Instead of feeling warm and welcoming, it was cold and foreboding like nature was trying to push them away. The droplets didn’t feel like warm kisses, they felt like icicles pelting them and leaving the team chilled to the bone.
Nuru suggests staying at an inn for the eighth time this week. No one complains, and they stop at the first one they see.
After making sure Prometheus is comfortable in the stables behind the inn, they go inside to find some shelter for themselves.
The inn is nice compared to some of the others they’ve stayed in. Towards the center of the room is massive fireplace with plush seating around it. People take up most of the seats, laughing and chattering as if the weather outside isn’t downright miserable.
“‘S fucking c- cold,” Hugo murmurs, teeth chattering. Nuru doesn’t make a comment about how he’s from Ingvarr, so he should be used to weather like this, which truly shows how worn down she is.
“Let’s j-just get our rooms and warm u-up,” she replies, rubbing her arms for warmth. Varian takes pity on her, pulling her against his side in hopes that it helps. She looks at him gratefully and they make their way over to the innkeeper while Hugo and Yong dash to the massive fireplace and argue over who gets to sit in the last empty chair.
The inkeeper looks at them with pity when they approach the desk. “Caught in the rain?” She asks sympathetically.
No it’s national baptism day, Varian thinks with a roll of his eyes. “Yeah. Four rooms, please.”
The woman pulls out a thick book and thumbs through the pages. She winces. “We only have two available rooms.”
Nuru waves the woman’s worries aside. “That’s fine. Doubles?”
“One is a single.” Upon seeing the look on Varian’s face, she offers another sympathetic smile. “Sorry, we got a huge influx of travelers who got stuck in the rain. I know there’s another inn in the other side of town, you could—“
“No!” Nuru exclaims hurriedly, slamming down a small bag of coins. “No, we’ll take the bedrooms for the night. Thank you so much.”
The innkeeper blinks for a moment, surprised by Nuru’s eagerness. But then she merely shrugs it off and reaches under the desk for two pairs of keys.
“I’m taking the double,” is the first the Nuru says as they walk away.
“I’ll room with you, then.”
Nuru shakes her head. “No way we’re sticking Hugo in the same bed as Yong. The last time we did that, Hugo complained for days about how much Yong kicks in his sleep.”
Varian frowns. “But I don’t—“
Nuru holds up a finger. “Nuh uh. I paid, so I say who goes where. You’ll survive sharing a bed with Hugo, but Yong will not. I don’t think he’s above murdering a thirteen year old.”
Varian rolls his eyes as they reach the other two, but he knows a losing battle when he sees one. Besides, he’s too tired to argue right now. He needs to curl up with Ruddiger and never wake up again.
***
“You better not kick in your sleep.”
Varian scowls from where he’s neatly folding his clothes. “You better not snore.”
Hugo makes an offended noise. “I do not snore!”
“That’s not what Yong said,” Varian replies in a sing-song voice.
Hugo squeezes his hands like he’s envisioning strangling Varian. “Whatever.” He turns away, hands going to his hair to take out his ponytail. Varian pauses, watching Hugo’s hair fall to his shoulders. It looks nice— soft, under the moonlight. It makes Varian wonder if he’s ever seen Hugo with his hair down.
When he had a nightmare, Varian thinks. His hair had been down then, but it feels different now. There’s something about watching Hugo get ready for bed that feels almost domestic, and it makes a warm feeling bloom in his chest.
Hugo looks up at him before he can think too hard about that , and Varian is suddenly very interested in counting the wood panels in the floor.
“What?” Hugo asks. “Do I have something on my face?”
“No.”
“Then why were you staring?”
Varian scoffs. “I wasn’t staring.” He was totally staring.
“You were totally staring,” Hugo responds flatly.
“Maybe your face is just so ugly that I can’t help but stare.” Varian crosses his arms and glares.
Hugo snorts. “Or it’s just that pretty. You got a thing for me, Goggles?”
Varian is not blushing, Varian is not blushing, Varian is not—
“You’re blushing!” Hugo exclaims, throwing his head back as he laughs. “It’s so easy to get you riled up.”
Varian responds by picking up one of the pillows and launching it, grinning when it hits Hugo right in the face. “Shut the fuck up,” he says, but he’s not really mad. “If you say one more thing, I will be kicking in my sleep.”
Hugo tosses the pillow back and Varian catches it easily. “Yes sir.”
Varian climbs into bed first and wastes no time sliding under the heavy blanket. Ruddiger is staying with Yong and Nuru tonight, and it’s weird not having that comforting presence with him. Hugo waits a moment more, sliding off his glasses and placing them on the nightstand by Varian’s goggles and Olivia.
“Night, Liv,” he whispers softly. Varian rolls over to face the blond as he slips under the covers.
“You don’t actually snore, do you?” He whispers.
Hugo rolls his eyes. “No, genius. Yong is a hellspawn who thrives off making my life miserable.”
Varian giggles. “Don’t dish out what you can’t take.”
Hugo gasps in mock offense. “What exactly are you insinuating, Hairstripe?”
“Oh, nothing.” Varian gives his most innocent smile and Hugo scoffs.
“Goodnight,” he says, rolling over.
“Goodnight.”
***
Varian wakes up later. He blinks at the moonlight shining directly in his eyes and buries his head in the pillow. He isn’t sure how long it’s been since he fell asleep, whether it’s early morning or if it’s late nighttime. Either way, he shouldn’t be awake right now.
Under the blankets, something is draped across his waist.
Oh, he thinks groggily. Ruddiger came back. He reaches under the blanket to pet his beloved friend and—
Varian’s eyes shoot open and he is suddenly very much awake.
That’s not fur. That’s skin.
He hears rustling behind him and freezes when Hugo mutters something. He’s on Varian’s side of the bed now, and while they’re not exactly pressed back to chest, it’s still much too close for comfort.
Slowly, as gently as he can, Varian moves Hugo’s arm. Or tries to, anyway. Hugo frowns in his sleep and instead of moving, he curls himself around Varian, nose brushing the back of his neck.
Varian’s pretty sure his heart is trying to pound its way out of his chest. It’s fine. It’s fine! He’ll just carefully try to roll out of his grip, slowly and cautiously, and—
Fall right onto the floor with a loud oomph! Great job, Varian.
He sits up and glares as hard as he can at the blond sleeping peacefully on Varian’s side of the bed. Fucking asshole.
Rubbing his bruised tailbone, he stands with every intention of waking Hugo up and giving him a piece of his mind. Varian no longer cares about being nice and keeping Hugo from being embarrassed. Honestly, he hopes Hugo is utterly mortified when he wakes up and learns he’d been treating Varian like a stuffed animal in his sleep, maybe he could use a little humbling.
But before he’s able to do anything, Hugo’s face twists into a frown. Varian recognizes this expression, the same one he wore when he was having a nightmare.
“Crap,” he whispers. “Hugo. ”
Hugo doesn’t answer, mumbling something incoherent and sounding distressed. His hand that was around Varian not too long ago grips the sheets tight enough that his fingers go white.
“Mom,” he whimpers. “Please.”
Varian swallows. Another nightmare. How often does this happen? He sits on the edge of the bed, careful to steer clear of Hugo’s arm.
“Hugo,” he whispers again, softer this time. “Wake up.”
Hugo makes a noise akin to a sob, and Varian feels something in him shatter. The expression he wears now is something so fragile and hopeless and pained that it makes Varian wonder just how heavy of a burden Hugo has been carrying lately.
He doesn’t know exactly what’s happening in Hugo’s mind right now, but he does know what it’s like to be haunted by a parent who’s no longer there. When his dad had been trapped in amber, not a single night went by without nightmares about him. His father calling him a disappointment, a failure, a monster. Sometimes he wouldn’t speak at all, would only look away, ashamed of what his son had become, as Varian was forced to watch the amber encased him over and over like a sick time loop.
Varian had no one to help him with the nightmares. He’s not about to let Hugo go through the same thing.
With a sigh, he adjusts himself until he’s sitting up against the headboard, then carefully pulls Hugo closer until the blond’s head is in his lap. Hugo grabs his leg tightly, like he’s afraid to let Varian slip away. He murmurs something that sounds a lot like “stay with me.” Varian frowns softly. He makes a soothing shushing noise and gently trails his fingers through Hugo’s hair.
“It’s okay,” he murmurs. “No one is leaving.”
Hugo takes a deep breath, his whole body shuddering as he does so, and his hand is trembling with how hard he’s holding onto Varian’s leg. It’s a little painful but Varian pays no mind to it, playing with blond hair and making soft humming noises in an effort to calm the sleeping boy.
It would’ve been so much easier to wake him up, Varian thinks. But as he watches Hugo’s expression finally shift into something a little less troubled, he can’t find it in himself to be embarrassed or wish he’d found another way to help. He’s relieved, if anything, that he’s able to have this effect on Hugo in his sleep.
And, okay. As long as he’s being honest with himself, part of him— a very, very tiny, minuscule part of him— enjoys this. Being a source of comfort for Hugo, that is.
Because when has Hugo ever let someone else take care of him? When has he ever allowed himself to admit that he needs someone else to be the strong one for a bit? Everyone knows Hugo would sooner die than let someone help him, especially when it means having to be vulnerable like this. So sue him if Varian enjoys the warm feeling spreading through his chest as he untangles the knots in Hugo’s hair and hums him into tranquil sleep.
He doesn’t realize the thief has awoken until he hears his name being mumbled against his thigh.
“Hm?” He looks down with a questioning noise to find Hugo blearily looking back at him. His eyes are half-lidded and slightly unfocused, whether from sleep or from not having his glasses.
“What are you doing?” Hugo mumbles, not making any move to push Varian away.
Varian blinks rapidly, a little startled. “I— uh…” his face grows warm and he forces himself to look away from Hugo’s hypnotic green eyes. “You’re just dreaming, Blondie.”
Awesome. Great tactic, Varian. When in doubt, gaslight your way out. At least, that’s what Hugo always says.
Hugo looks puzzled for a moment more before the expression is gone. He’s clearly still too close to sleep to question it, which Varian is extremely thankful for. He can’t even begin to imagine the mortification they’d both feel if Hugo was conscious enough to be able to tell dreams from reality.
“I’m so tired,” Hugo whispers, so quiet that Varian can barely hear it.
Varian doesn’t know what to say to that, so he just keeps playing with Hugo’s hair until the blond’s breathing evens out. When he thinks he’s fallen asleep, he stops.
“No,” Hugo whines, eyes closed but still clearly not asleep. “I like that.”
Varian snorts. “Go to bed, I’m tired too.”
A hand is weakly tugging at his shirt. “Lay down.”
“I—“ Varian’s mouth opens and closes. “Are you sure?”
“It’s just a dream,” Hugo sighs. Is Varian reading too much into it, or does he almost sound… disappointed? “Not like any of this is real.”
Right. Varian swallows and takes a deep breath. It’s not real, at least to Hugo’s knowledge. He complies with the request, sliding under the blankets. He gently pushes at Hugo’s shoulder until he rolls over, facing away from Varian, who in turn drapes an arm around his torso and pulls him closer until his chest is to Hugo’s back.
It’s fine. It’s not like Varian can feel his face becoming tomato red or like his heart is pounding madly against his ribcage. He’s not affected by this at all!
“‘Night, Varian,” Hugo murmurs.
Varian. What a pretty name when it comes from Hugo’s lips.
“Goodnight,” he whispers against Hugo’s shoulder.
***
Varian wakes up first, thankfully with sunshine lighting up the room rather than moonlight. The first thing he registers is the vaguely familiar smell of Hugo, who’s still pressed tightly against him. He can tell from the blond’s even breathing and steady heartbeat that he’s still asleep.
There hadn’t any more nightmares after that, at least to Varian’s knowledge. Good, he thinks as he stares at Hugo’s back.
It won’t be long before the others are awake, and if they already are, then it won’t be too long before they come pounding on Hugo and Varian’s door. Varian should slip out of bed now, remove his arms from Hugo before he wakes up and freaks out, but…
But it feels kind of nice. Okay, maybe a lot nice. Either way, Varian finds himself hesitant to leave despite the fact that it’s a totally insane thing to feel because hello, it’s Hugo!
A crazy thought crosses his mind, one that leaves him with a funny feeling in his chest. The thought of being able to wake up like this every day, of waking up to the sight of a completely unguarded Hugo in his arms, the warmth of his body grounding Varian and making him cuddle closer.
Maybe in another universe, he wouldn’t scramble out of the bed to get that thought out of his mind. Maybe in another universe he’d be ready to admit that the warm feeling that keeps hitting him has a name. Maybe in another universe, Hugo feels it too.
But that universe isn’t this one. In this universe, Varian goes downstairs. In this universe, Varian eats breakfast with Nuru and Yong, and tries to act normal when Hugo joins.
“How’d you sleep?” Varian asks as casually as possible.
Hugo shrugs. “Like a baby.” He pauses. “Hey, uh— I didn’t… say anything weird, did I? In my sleep?”
Maybe in another universe, Varian would stammer and stutter his way through an explanation and tell Hugo the truth. Maybe in another universe, Hugo would blush and say thank you.
In this universe, Varian lies. “Not that I heard. Didn’t snore, either.”
Hugo grins. “Told you so.”
“And I didn’t kick you.”
“Thank the Maker for that.”
Yong looks up at them with a thunderous scowl. “Hey!”
The group laughs and returns to their breakfast. Varian eats, sneaking glances at Hugo from time to time. He thinks it was just a dream. He doesn’t know it was real, but Varian does.
And that, to him at least, makes all the difference.