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“”Normal objects” don’t have… feelings and stuff!” Susie proclaimed. She looked distressed, as if her entire world had been shattered, and in a way it had.
“That’s right, Susie. They… shouldn’t. That’s why… I don’t want you and Kris… to worry too much about it, OK?” Ralsei responded. He looked as if he was about to cry.
Kris stood there watching as their conversation continued. They had known that he wasn’t real, that none of this was. They had a part in all of this after all. They knew it was wrong of any of them to get too attached. They didn’t hate him, they didn't hate any of them, but it would be wrong to get too attached. It could hurt.
“Just forget about us and make some real friends, okay?”
It seems he agreed with their sentiment.
But nothing they could tell themselves would make it any easier.
They stand at the precipice, the prophecy foretold, the end spoiled. Susie’s hand clenched, covered in her blood, Ralsei’s face a mess of tears.
“I’M SORRY IM- I- SUSIE IM SOR-“
“Shut up.”
She laughs. Kris always liked that about her, her laugh. She could always laugh, no matter the situation.
“The hell are you apologizing for? You’re worried about THAT!? Seriously!? … this stupid prophecy.”
They hadn’t seen it. The end. The only word they could make out was sacrifice. Of who or what, they did not know.
“I wouldn’t let it happen… Kris wouldn’t let it happen…”
They wouldn’t? Even if it meant saving everything they hold dear? They had an idea from their partners of what the finale would be, and although vague, it was enough to know not to get too attached.
”And obviously YOU wouldn’t let it happen.”
He wouldn’t let anything happen to Susie or them.
“So stop crying, ‘k? Everything’s gonna be all right.”
Susie walks off with a laugh, inviting them to come close the fountain, leaving them alone with Ralsei. Their SOUL flutters, leading them to him. He speaks of Susie, of the prophecy, of his mistakes.
”How can she be so kind?”
They didn’t know. They really didn't know how, after everything, she could still be so selfless. They listened to him talk more about their fates.
“But… but no matter what we do… our fate… is already decided.”
He drops to his knees, his hands covering his eyes as he sobs to himself. What was this they were feeling? Deep inside their heart? It was strange, they looked at him and they couldn’t help but want to reach out, to embrace him, to tell him it’s okay. But… they shouldn’t get too attached.
“S-sorry… don’t look at me… I… I don’t mean to always… make everything about me… I’m sorry. I…”
They can’t help but ache, looking at him… still trying to spare them the trouble of caring, of worrying, despite his whole world being shattered.
“Everything’s ok, Kris. Look, I… I’m smiling!”
They… they wanted to reach out and tell him-
“It’s okay not to smile.”
Their voice cracked, their emotion seeping through their otherwise neutral demeanour. They had been told what to say, but… they… they wanted to…
They feel his tears seeping through their cloak and the warmth of his breath on their neck as they bring him into an embrace. They fought off the feeling building behind their eyes.
”K… Kris? Kris, you… haha… I… I’m scared… It’s getting harder and harder… to just stand there smiling all the time. To be the one… pretending I’m not afraid, too.”
They… they couldn’t…
”I… I want to. I want to believe again. I want to believe… it can change! That there isn’t just one ending! Susie’s hope… her naive hope… It’s… infectious, isn’t it Kris? … So until we see fate with our own eyes… let’s believe too.”
Hope. The naive hope that they both carried. That Susie inspired. They hadn’t realized that he… Ralsei… they hadn’t realized. They wanted to stay there but…
”…Kris, you can go to the fountain now. Susie’s waiting.”
Despite everything, despite the weight that he has carried alone until now, he’s still himself, putting himself last. They walk away, a tear streaming down their cheek. They… they wanted to make things right. For him. To change their fates… to have that same hope, for him. But they knew they could get too-
“Umm… Kris?”
Oh?
”You were…”
They turned to look back at him, their eyes wide, hidden behind their bangs. The smudges of his tears stained his cheeks and the corners of his eyes, yet his smile was bright and alive. They had thought for a moment that maybe he- but no… that would mean-
”You were cool when you played the piano earlier!”
oh no.
You were cool when you played the piano.
You were cool when you played the piano.
You were cool when you played the piano.
His words stuck in Kris’s head, and no matter what they did, they couldn’t get them out. They’d always assumed that he saw them as nothing more than what the prophecy says of them, a simple cage for something stronger, more important. But… but he noticed. He noticed them, and now they… they can’t get him out of their head. He’s grown so much these last few days, they feel like they’ve met someone new. But… but he noticed.
He sees them. Kris. No one else does… not Susie. Noelle notices something, but she can't see past the mask. But he knows. He can see Kris. He can truly see them. Everything he’s said, that ride on the swan, especially, they were so quick to write off. So quick to assume he didn’t care for them, but for the thing they housed.
He saw them when they felt freest. And he liked them for it. Playing the piano was always when they felt truly in control. Their ultimate form of self-expression, the ultimate symbol of their freedom. They loved it, they loved to play more than anything. They wouldn’t give it up for the world. Giving it up would mean accepting they'd never be free. It has pained them that they couldn’t play while they play the role of a cage.
But when they did… he noticed, and he liked it. Their freedom. Kris.
They needed to talk to him. They had been following Susie to the school. They assumed she wanted a place to stay, or a place to begin changing their fates. They didn’t bring their ‘prisoner’ with them, every step felt like a thousand, but… maybe he would see.
”Kris? You ok?” Susie said, looking over at them with her crooked smile. Always so charming. She looked concerned for her friend; it must have been their stumbling.
Kris glances over at her, their breath increasingly laboured as they think of the bed that awaited them in Castle Town. They weren’t okay. But she didn’t need to know that, she couldn’t.
”… I don’t know,” Kris said. It felt strange to speak for themselves now, not as a speaker phone for something or someone else. They had forgotten what it felt like.
Susie looked at them and nodded. There wasn’t much else to say. They were glad that she had known them well enough to know when to leave it be. They follow her down to Castle Town, Ralsei not there to greet them like he usually is, not that they’re surprised.
Oh Angel…
They had been so quick to… had they only known the burden he carried was much like their own… maybe they would have enjoyed some of their time together more. They felt ungrateful now.
The streets of Castle Town were as lively as ever, even at this late hour. None of them had any idea what had just happened, the battle they fought against a destroyer of worlds. They looked at the little Seap Seam inhabited, he knew. He always knew. He also seemed to carry a burden much like Ralsei’s. Knowledge. Not of his own fate, but of those he’s tried to guide. He always seemed to look at Ralsei with pity. As if he felt sorry for the prince.
They walked past the seap and into the Castle itself. They followed Susie up the stairs where they split, Susie shutting herself in her room. Kris inspected their own room, the wall sealed once again from their earlier tea party, a slice of pie left on their nightstand. Ralsei had remembered their favourite food. They had begun to realize just how long he had been searching for Kris behind the puppet strings. It made them ache to think about.
They grabbed the pie on their nightstand, but refrained from eating it. They left their room and went up the stairs at the end of the hall, making their way to the green door that stood at the end.
They opened the door and closed it softly behind them. He was standing in front of his window, trembling, clutching the plush they had wished they had gifted him to his chest. They looked his around room, the ladder and the couch cushion neatly sat in the corner. They open their mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. They take a deep breath.
”…Ralsei?” They say.
Ralsei jumps and falls; they liken it to a cat in a cartoon. He quickly composes himself, rubbing his eyes as if he could hide the fact that he was crying from them. The blood on his cheek was gone.
”K-Kris!? What are you…” Ralsei says, his voice still trembling from just before, “…n-not that I mind, of course! It’s just… unexpected!”
They supposed they should be honest with him, now that he’s promised to be honest with them.
”Homes not great. Wanted to talk to you,” they said quietly. Their breaths grew increasingly more laboured, and they felt it harder and harder to stand. They stumbled a bit before setting themselves on the ground. They put the plate of pie down beside them.
”I see, Kris. I’m sorry. I-I’m glad you’ve found this place to feel at home enough to stay a while!” Ralsei says, sitting down across from Kris.
“I… umm… what did you want to talk about?”
“They aren’t here,” Kris says.
”K-Kris? What do you mea-“
”Ralsei.”
Ralsei lets out a sigh, as if a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. He looks at Kris, scooting closer to them with a smile. He looked as if he was refraining from reaching out.
”Umm… how… how are you doing?” He mumbled into his scarf, a faint blush rising to his cheeks.
They look at him, and their chest tightens. How could they let themselves get so attached so easily?
”How are you?” Kris counters.
“Kris, it would be improper for me to talk about myself after-“
”Ralsei. Please,” they interrupted. They have had enough of his so-called purpose.
”Kris… I… I…” they watch as he begins to softly sob to himself,
“I’m sorry. For everything. For this prophecy. For your role. I’ve tried so hard to ease your burden, yet all I ever seem to do is make it worse. What kind of Darkner am I? Making you worry about me.”
”One that gives me hope,” Kris responds. Ralsei looks up at them, tears slowly streaming down his cheeks.
” You're the only one to see past it. To see me.”
“Kris… you're a wonderful person, you know that? If I could take your burden, I would, just so I can see you for you. I'm grateful that you care... about how I feel. B-but…” Ralsei says, cut short by another outbreak of silent sobbing.
Kris scoots closer to him, bringing him into their embrace. He doesn’t melt into it like he usually does. He seemed conflicted.
”But?”
”I don’t want you to feel for me. To get… attached,” Ralsei choked.
A few hours ago, they would have agreed, but now, after everything, how could they not? How could they not feel attached to him?
”Why?” They asked.
”I don’t want you to hurt, Kris. I have hope that things can change. I do. B-But… I must be prepared. No matter how much it hurts. I… I don’t want you to spend the rest of your life wondering that if you did something a little different, maybe, just maybe, things would have turned out better,” Ralsei said somberly,
“I want you to be able to forget, Kris. About all of this.”
Kris squeezes him, and he makes his decision. They can feel his body melt into theirs.
”I don’t want to forget,” Kris whispered, gently petting the back of Ralsei’s head. They could feel him nuzzling into the crook of their neck and everything felt right, even for just a moment.
”Have you ever had pie?” Kris asked.
”Kris? I… I can’t say I ever have, why?” Ralsei responded, his breath warm on Kris’s skin. He seemed bewildered by the sudden change of tone.
”Would you like to try?”
”Kris… I made that for you. I know it’s your favourite.”
Kris pulls away and scoots back. They grabbed the plate of pie and placed it between the two of them. They slip off a gauntlet.
”Then we can share,” they say, scooping up a piece of pie with their finger. They bring it to his lips much like he did when he fed them that apple the old man gave them.
He’s hesitant at first, his face bright red, but slowly he accepts it. They place their finger against his lips, and it lingers for a moment longer than they intended. But it’s nothing to worry about.
They watch as his face lights up with delight, the flavour making its way across his palate. They were happy that he enjoyed it. That it was something they could share. He rolled up his sleeve, taking another piece of pie with his finger and bringing it to their lips. They shared it. All of it.
Kris scoops the last piece into their finger, bringing it to Ralsei’s lips.
”I don’t want to forget, because you haven’t forgotten about me,” They say, their finger lingering on his lips, this time intentionally.
“About my love for pie. The piano. Me. I don’t want to forget you. I won’t. Okay?”
They see the conflict on his face. The want. How he denies himself what he desires because it would be “improper”.
”Okay,” Ralsei responds. The tears well up in his eyes once more, and Kris cups his cheek, their hand finding his.
”Kris?”
They tilt their head.
”Could you play the piano for me?”
They respond with a rare smile.
They knew the festival was next, after the church was their dad’s flower shop. Then the festival, it was obvious, wasn't it? The perfect opportunity to sow chaos. They had been keyed into the Knights' plan, even if it was just improvising after yesterday's events. They also knew all of the implications that came with being at the festival with someone.
Ralsei or bust.
Words that weren’t their own but didn’t necessarily disagree with now.
If you told them a few days ago they’d spend the night with Ralsei, sharing pie, playing the piano for him and cuddling next to him in their bed so he didn’t have to sleep on the floor, they’d have probably laughed. Even more so if you told them that it was all their choice.
They had asked him again if he’d like to go to the festival with them. After they had given him a flower they had found. Unique amongst the rest that grew in that strange Dark World. He insisted that he couldn’t go. But they knew what was to come. He was so certain that last night was the end of the prophecy. But so much had changed. The renewed hope in his eyes, that beautiful, beautiful hope, it was… intoxicating.
He agreed, of course. Likely to appease their thoughts. Part of them wished he’d said no, how could they have gotten so attached?
And now they sit here with Ralsei in the Ferris Wheel, he had intended to ask Susie to ride with them on his behalf. A singular ice cream cone he bought for them, which he was embarrassed by the idea of sharing when they offered. He licks one side, and they would lick the other. What was so weird about that?
It was one of those moments they had alone. The object they held deep inside of them, sent away.
“Kris?” Ralsei spoke, “Can I tell you something?
They look at him and nod.
”Just a day ago, I felt like it was all so hopeless. Our fates were sealed. No matter what we did, we couldn’t change it. Susie’s fate, yours… mine,” Ralsei says, a somber laugh escaping him as he thinks about his fate, whatever it may have been.
“B-but… look! Here we are! This… this was never written! I’m here… with you! And… and I can’t stop thinking about it! That night, when you came and cheered me up. It… it meant a lot to me, Kris. I’m just glad that… maybe I'll be able to return the favour some day. If you'd like.”
They look at him with a smile. They never would have guessed how much he would’ve grown on them.
“Sure,” they say. Ralsei smiled; they never were much for words, and they were glad that he didn’t mind.
They enjoy their silent company for a while, staring out of the Ferris wheel's windows. The world below seemed so tiny, even if most of it was shrouded in darkness. The silence was interrupted by Ralsei.
”I… I haven’t been able to get it out of my head, Kris,” Ralsei says.
Oh?
”I… how you came and cheered me up, how we shared a treat, you playing the piano for me and letting me stay with you in your bed, it… It makes my chest tight. My cheeks warm.”
He reaches out to grab their hand, and they let him. Strangely, their cheeks were also starting to get warm.
”I… I think I’ve always known. I don’t feel the same with Susie as I do with you. When I’m with Susie, I’m happy, but with you it’s like everything’s right in the world. But… but I never let myself feel until you two told me it’s okay. Until I found out what being Ralsei-like is.”
They feel their chest tighten. Their throat constrict.
”Kris… what I think I’m trying to say is… I love you… and it would make me really h-happy if you loved me back.”
They had wished in that moment that they weren’t in control. That they didn’t have to make this choice. They didn’t know which one was the correct one. If there even was one.
They looked at him, his cheeks warm and his expression growing increasingly worried, the longer that they had grown silent. After a while, they were sure they could see tears beginning to form in the corners of his eyes.
They squeezed his hand and they pulled him closer. They had made their decision. They bring his face closer to their own and lean in for a small, chaste kiss. Enough to say that they felt the same. That they would give their world for him.
The truth was, they don’t know if they made the right choice. If this was just what was easy, what fell too perfectly into place, or if this is what they truly wanted. Only time would tell.
But if there was one thing they were certain of,
It’s that they would give everything for him.
Their world.
Their freedom.
Much like they would for any of their friends.
They didn’t say a word. What could they say?
”Kris?” Ralsei spoke, cheeks burning red and stained with tears of joy, “Do you think you could teach me to play piano some time? I’d love to play with you.”
They smiled and leaned against him, as he leaned against them.
”I’d love to,” they whispered.
They stand at the end.
Their fates sealed.
With one thing left to do.
One last word that has yet to be spoken.
Sacrifice.
The symbols on the bunker door made sense. One for each sacrifice. The last being of the Deltarune.
One of them. A sacrifice of something they hold most dear.
oh no.
The sounds of the world's end, of the roaring, all of it is drowned out by the soft sobbing that had begun behind them. It was then that they knew… they shouldn’t have gotten so attached.
oh why.
They turn around to see him. His tears streamed down his face as he kneeled. A shaky smile that they had grown to love plastered his face. The face they had grown to adore.
oh angel, why?
”K-Kris… Susie…” he sobs, his face a mess and full of fear,
“I… this… is my purpose…. m-my fate… so that you may live on… as heroes… amongst the ones you love, your family… your…”
His voice cracked.
“… your real friends…”
why?
Susie had begun to cry, it took everything to keep themselves together.
”I… I had hoped… hoped that we changed it. How foolish I was to hope… to cling onto it when I thought I had it… a new destiny,” he sobs. He turns to look at them.
please don’t.
”All that I ask… is that you… you do it Kris. I… I’m sorry that I must be so… so selfish… but… I want my last feeling… to be of you…”
everything hurt. their body, their soul, their heart.
it hurt.
they couldn’t resist the all-powerful voice in their head when it told them to draw.
don’t make them do this. please.
they couldn’t hold them back anymore. their tears.
they thought they could hear susie begging them to stop. to resist it. if only.
”Oh Kris…” he sobbed,
”I had hoped… hoped to spare this for you… to spare you the pain of being attached…”
please.
”But… I… I think in reality… I was selfish… I wanted to spare myself the pain… the fear that comes with missing those who cared for you… wondering if they’ll be okay after you're gone, after the end…”
please stop.
”I… I’m scared, Kris… of the dark. I… don’t want my time with you… either of you to end. I want there to… to be something… something with me in the dark. I want that thing to be you… so selfishly… to love you until the end of time.”
stop.
”Y-you and Susie… you made me f-feel like I mattered… like I was more than just a thing. B-but Kris…?”
no, please.
”…you made me feel real... alive.”
they’re commanded to raise their sword above their head.
their tears fall from the eyes, onto his cheeks, mixing with his own.
”Oh, Kris… it aches me to see you cry…”
their sobs get more violent as they feel the warmth of his hand on their cheeks.
even in the face of the end, he wishes to spare them the pain.
”I… I don’t want to let go… I… I’ll be okay, Kris… I… I love you…”
oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh n-
“…don’t forget? Okay?”
they sob, their chest tightening as they feel the command.
their muscles stiffen.
their heart aches.
swing.
they swear they heard its voice crack.
as if it didn’t want this either.
they knew now that the decision they made on the ferris wheel was the right one.
they loved him.
they would give their everything to be with him.
until the end of time.
everything is replaced by the sound of their blade whistling through the air.
the loss of warmth on their cheeks.
the tears that never seemed to end.
susie wouldn’t have let this happen.
ralsei wouldn’t if the roles were reversed.
everyone else would have found a way.
so why wouldn't they?
why wouldn’t they find a way for the one who asked for their hand?
and then the sound of cutting pierced through everything.
the sickening sound of blade through flesh.
then silence.
deafening silence.
and then…
then a scream.
and then pain.
searing agony.
warmth dripping its way down their left arm and onto the ground.
then the cries of the one they loved more than anything.
they look.
their hand gone.
they would never play again.
the piano.
their world.
their freedom.
gone forever.
at least, it would never be the same.
it wanted something they loved more than anything and they chose their freedom.
because they could never give up.
him.
they felt their back hit the floor, they could see their hand lying next to them.
his face, panicked, covered in their blood as he cries over them.
they can make out his cries for help as he tries to heal them.
the feeling of his lips on their skin.
susies arms cradling them as they’re scooped up.
they smile as they make him out faintly, alive, dragging susie along as fast as he can. they wish they could reach out and stop his tears.
they want to run far far away from this place. with him.
they can hear the sound of their prisoner ending this.
saving the world.
the last thing they hear is an,
i love you,
before blacking out.
then they awake, hazy, for but a moment.
the last thing they remember is the hospital bed.
surrounded by everyone they love.
being handed a little red horn headband by susie.
telling them that he wanted to be close.
They had been sitting on the piano stool for staring for what felt like ages. They could still feel their hand, the phantom limb ghosting over the keys.
Sat next to them was Ralsei. Here. At home.
They hadn’t heard the full story, all they knew is that he had been gifted light by a man most peculiar. His face seeming to be cracked open, perpetually in a weeping smile.
They had a feeling the light was the light that shined in the soul they kept caged. They never pried.
”Ready, Kris?” Ralsei asks, his left hand resting against the keys.
They raise their only hand and nod.
Together they play. They play the very first song that that they played for him all that time ago. A serenade, the song of the legend.
It was the first time they had played since they gave him their hand. They felt free. They had been themselves for months but, now, do they feel like they’ve truly been freed.
They can feel the warmth of his smile on them, a silent push to keep on going. They were so happy they could cry.
“Thank you,” they say, their voice cracking.
Ralsei doesn’t respond, only shifting to lean against them as their song comes to an end. He yawned, nuzzling against them as he took in the smell of their apple shampoo.
He didn’t need to say anything. They knew what he would say anyway. They placed a hand on his cheek, bringing him into a kiss.
”I love you,” they whisper.
”I love you more,” he whispers back.