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1. "EXCLUSIVE: BRUCE WAYNE CAUGHT IN SECRET RENDEZVOUS WITH MYSTERIOUS WOMAN"
By Vicky Vale
'Gotham's most eligible bachelor Bruce Wayne was spotted in a secret meeting (date!) at the Grand Lounge. Sources describe the woman as tall with long blonde hair. The woman was seen having an intimate dinner with the famous playboy.
Witnesses report the pair shared a bottle of Dom Perignon and a suspicious amount of laughter. Other sources claimed that during the end of the long dinner Wayne and the mystery woman shared a long hug, ending the date with the billionaire kissing her forehead affectionately.
Bruce Wayne was photographed two days earlier during a date with Selina Kyle (who, according to sources does not look like Wayne's latest date). Kyle, the woman that every Gothamite is convinced Bruce is dating. Though, the relationship has not been confirmed or denied ( Wayne and Kyle have yet to make a statement on the matter). Making all of Gotham wonder if this secret date could be an affair or if he, living up to the playboy title, has simply moved on to the next.'
What the Gotham Gazette failed to realise: the mysterious 'woman' was actually Dick Grayson, Bruce's eldest son, in a wig. Which was a result of a dare after he lost a game against his little brother Jason. And Dick is definitely not one to back down from a dare, even if he has to sacrifice his father's reputation. Though he did warn Selina beforehand, as she can be 'a little scary' sometimes, Dick's words.
Dick's comment after the news aired: "Honestly, I really rocked that wig. I knew I could pull it off, but I didn't quite expect this outcome to be honest. I saw some comments from other women on Waynestagram talking about how envious they were of my well built butt, might drop the glutes routine soon"
2. "PHILANTHROPIST BRUCE WAYNE SPOTTED YELLING AT A PLANT - IS THIS THE BILLIONAIRE'S BREAKDOWN?"
Alexander Knox
'This morning Bruce Wayne was spotted in the Wayne Botanical Garden yelling at a plant during an outing with his youngest son Damian Wayne. Whilst staff could not figure out what led Wayne to such an outburst in the serene garden, other visitors claimed the man caused a scene out of nowhere.
Staff and onlookers claimed to have heard Wayne saying disturbing phrases such as:
"Who even let you in here?!"
"You should go back to your house!"
"Stop trying to eat the visitors"
Spectators state they saw Damian Wayne shaking his head at his father as he slowly increased the distance between them, effectively removing himself from the scene.
This whole incident makes us wonder; could the pressure of business, high-society and fatherhood be taking a toll on Bruce Wayne?'
What the staff and onlookers in the gardens were not aware of is the fact that the plant who was present in the garden was Frank, a mutated Venus fly trap created by Poison Ivy. He is Poison Ivy's best friend and roommate, whilst he usually stays in Ivy's appartement he occasionally escapes to the Wayne Botanical Gardens to pull some pranks and create a little bit of chaos. Which is how he ended up irritating Bruce and causing the poor man to have what appears to be a public breakdown.
3. "BRUCE WAYNE FAN OF TERRORISM?"
By Deb Donovan
'Gotham socialite has shocked all of Gotham with his claim on loving terrorism. In a recent tweet Bruce Wayne shared: "My favourite Terrorist is going to be in Gotham tomorrow night at the Gotham Theater. I am pleased to be able to witness such greatness in person. #SoExcited #Gotham"
The GCPD has cancelled the orchestra performance which was scheduled to be taking place in the Gotham Theater tomorrow night.
A GCPD representative stated: "We are taking this seriously, and have decided to cancel the orchestra performance tomorrow night as a precaution. Mister Wayne has been taken in for questioning."
Seriously, what is going on with Wayne?!'
*update: "TERRORIST ISSUE RESOLVED"
By Deb Donovan
'Turns out Gothamite Bruce Wayne is fan of the tenorist playing in the orchestra not of terrorism. Bruce Wayne commented on the issue:
"I'm deeply sorry for the inconvenience I caused yesterday. I did not double read my tweet and seemed to have missed the autocorrection. I simply wanted to share my excitement about my favourite tenorist."
It seems that Bruce Wayne may not be the villain in this story after all, but the autocorrection is. The GCPD seemed to have resolved the issue with Wayne and has decided let the event continue but with strengthened security.'
4. "BRUCE WAYNE SPOTTED DUMPSTER DIVING - A NEW BILLIONAIRE TREND?"
By Rosalie Kim
'Gotham's elite left speechless and confused after video's and foto's surfaced of billionaire playboy Bruce Wayne climbing out of a dumpster in Gotham's Finance District.
Witnesses claim that Wayne, in a dirtied suit emerged from the alleyway holding a metallic box whilst muttering: "I knew I would find it".
After seeing the images online people drew their own conclusions with the most popular one being: Wayne being on mental spiral after a rumored breakup with Selina Kyle.
Social media exploded with #DumpsterDaddy trending on twitter for 5 hours.
Exclusive statements from the Wayne household
Dick Grayson:
"At least he didn't sleep in it. That's personal growth."
Mr Pennyworth (Wayne Residence butler):
"Master Bruce was simply retrieving a stolen Wayne-Tech prototype, which was discarded by a fleeing thief."'
5." MYSTERIOUS MAN SNEAKING FROM WAYNE MANOR - BRUCE WAYNE'S NEW BOYFRIEND? "
Vicky Vale
'Gotham's infamous playboy Bruce Wayne has once again stirred the rumour mill- this time with yet another secret romance.
This morning at approximately 5:48 a.m. a leather wearing man carrying a red motorcycle helmet was spotted by several neighbours climbing over the gate surrounding the Wayne property. The man then walked to a discretely parked motorcycle behind trees, before disappearing on the red and black motorbike.
The real scandal? The neighbours have claimed this is not the first time they have seen the mysterious man leave the manor.
Naturally Gotham wonders: Does Bruce Wayne have a new secret boyfriend, if so what about Kyle?
When reached for comment: Both Wayne Enterprises and Bruce Wayne's PR team declined to give a statement.'
Back in the manor Dick and Tim were both folding over laughing whilst holding their stomachs. Bruce was rubbing at his forehead, he felt a headache starting to form. Then Bruce received a text from Jason stating that last night that was his the last time he would be coming over, claiming it was a big mistake and that he only came over for Alfred's cooking. Bruce is sure that this could have easily been avoided if Jason would just take his identity back publicly, for gods sake Bruce had a whole statement ready. But of course not, life could never just be easy. He was sure Jason would come around though, at least he hoped.
+1 "BILLIONAIRE WITH A HEART OF GOLD: BRUCE WAYNE QUIETLY FUNDS YOUTH CENTER, VOLUNTEERS WITH LOCAL KIDS"
By Lois Lane
'In Gotham, the city known for it's high crime rates, chaos, corruption, it is easy to forget that some of Gotham's heroes don't wear domino masks or capes. But in this case suits: Bruce Wayne, Gotham's elusive billionaire, philanthropist and father, was recently spotted at the construction of a new community youth center, which is almost entirely funded by Wayne himself.
The center will offer tutoring, after school programs as well as free meals for the at-risk youth. Locals were surprised to see the billionaire not just overseeing the project but also actively helping with the construction itself, this all whilst still wearing his perfect suit; which probably costs a fortune. Afterwards Wayne was seen reading story books for a couple of local kids, who all had taken to him immediately.
The Wayne's charitable history is long, dating back to generations long before Bruce Wayne. Whilst Bruce Wayne prefers to keep his charitable acts relatively in the dark, multiple sources have confirmed that:
- Bruce Wayne funds over 30 independent scholarships
- His Wayne Medical relief fund has helped uninsured Gothamites be able to receive medical care in case of emergencies
- He singlehandedly funds ten different orphanages, two women's shelters and a program focussed on helping ex-convicts find jobs and reintegrate back into society
Not Only is Wayne a charitable and generous man, who gives back so much for the city. He is also a loving father, raising and fostering multiple adopted children of varying ages and personalities. Even though tabloids often criticise and speculate about Wayne's unconventional home life, insiders describe him as a man who cares deeply for his children.
To put it simply: Bruce Wayne is a man who cares about his city, his family and most importantly about people.'