Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Bucky woke up, coughing. Back in the HYDRA base, where they had been knocked out. He looked over to see Loki on the floor next to him, groaning.

She looked different somehow. She wasn’t wearing her armour.

“Lokes, you awake? Did we make it back to our timeline?”

Loki groaned, sitting up slowly. She looked over at Bucky and blinked. “Where am I? Do I know you?”

Bucky’s heart sank. “It’s me, Bucky.” Loki’s expression was blank. “James? Steve’s best friend? We’re back at the HYDRA base.”

“Steve’s… What? I don’t understand. Steve and I were painting in the park, having a picnic. How did I get here?”

Shit. Was this the “original” Loki? The one his Loki had replaced?

Is this what she meant by a price?

The rest of the team was already on the quinjet, waiting for their last duo to check in. They were running late, and Steve was pacing at the bottom of the ramp. 

He saw Bucky and Loki approaching, and ran toward his fiancée, only for Bucky to grab his arm. “Steve. This is going to take some explaining.”

“What the hell are you talking about, Buck?”

He glanced over at Loki, something seeming out of place; she wasn’t in her armour anymore. 

Bucky hesitated for a moment, remembering what Loki had told him before sending him through the portal. “All magic has a price. The stronger the magic, the higher the price. Loki… Has to pay for what she did.”

“Bucky, what is going on?”

He gestured vaguely. “This is… She is… The price.” At that cryptic pronouncement, Steve scrunched his face and pushed Bucky aside, the latter only sighing.

“Loki, sweetheart, are you…?” He scanned her face, something missing in her eyes.

“Sweetheart? Are we on to pet names now? You certainly have moved faster than I would have expected.” She rolled her eyes. “At least kiss me, first.”

He did, ignoring the knots twisting in his stomach. His hands wrapped around her head and he pressed his lips to hers, Loki’s eyes going wide in surprise.

“Oh. Wow. Okay. That was… Nice? I guess?”

Bucky shook his head in the background. “Stevie, I tried to explain, but we’ve got some more time travel shenanigans here. Multiverse shenanigans? Some kind of shenanigans, anyway.”

“Right, something about a portal?” Loki added, looking a bit flushed. “Not one of Strange’s. One moment I was painting cherry blossoms, the next— woke up in a basement with your friend here. Something about this isn’t right; now I am no expert, but I do not think this is how time travel works.”

Steve gaped, suddenly talking in the situation.

“She broke the universe to get to me. That kind of magic, she rewrote the rules. She couldn’t just replace her past self, she had to…”

“Are we talking about me? I broke the universe? How long ago was that?”

Bucky frowned. “Two years, give or take. From our perspective.”

Steve turned back to Bucky. “Hold on. Is this when she left from? In her original timeline?”

“Fuck if I know! I’ve just spent two months in another universe with your fiancée and she didn’t come back. Find Tony or Bruce, hell Peter would probably figure it out. Strange, maybe, the other him seemed to have some experience with this shit. I don’t know.”

“Can we go home?” Loki had her arms crossed, as aloof as ever. Steve closed his eyes for a moment, wishing he could have just once understood what his life had become since he got out of the ice.

Bucky took initiative, motioning towards the jet. “Yeah, come on doll, let’s get out of here. I think we’re all gonna need some time.”

“Wait, Buck, what do you mean two months?”

“Okay, let’s call this the point of divergence.”

Tony pointed to a dot that was labeled with the date of Steve and Loki’s picnic. He then drew two diagonal lines away from it, with more lines following.

It was an impromptu meeting; Tony was standing by a whiteboard at the head of the table, with Bruce, Peter, and Clint on his right side, and Bucky, Steve, and Loki on the left.

“The other thing we’re sure of in both timelines is the Convergence.” He drew another line bisecting the split timelines and dated it appropriately. “So now we come to today.” He put a dot at the end of the top timeline. “In the other timeline,” he placed a dot at the end, “same day as today, the working theory is that was when the Goddess of Stories broke out of Asgard and went back,” a looping arrow to the first dot, “to the park.”

Peter was nodding along, Loki was staring at the dates, and everyone else looked somewhere between confused and upset.

“So, when she replaced the Loki at the park, that Loki, er, this current Loki,” another line curving from the dot back to the end of their timeline, “arrived here. Well, to where the other Loki was on the mission. And that Loki—” He gestured vaguely before locking eyes with Bucky. “Your turn to start some explaining, Iceman. As far as we could tell you never left the basement, and if not for the Loki switcheroo and your longer hair, we’d never know any different.”

Bucky groaned, dreading what was to come.

“She called herself the Goddess of Stories, sure, but looking back— I think she was the Goddess of Chaos. She just convinced herself she didn’t have to play by any rules, went back and made everything happen faster than it did for her. But that doesn’t work! Loki kept being vague about it, and Strange, well, the other one, tried to explain it with the time stone. So did those weird witches in New Asgard. That if you go back and change something, you’re not changing your timeline—you’re creating a new one.” He pointed at Tony’s diagram for emphasis. “So she went back, displaced her current self,” he motioned at Loki, “and tried to have a do-over. But we don’t get those, not really.”

The air was tense, so Clint took the opportunity to be the snarky one.

“You sure you were only there two months? I don’t think I’ve ever heard you say so many big words.”

Bucky glared before continuing.

“Anyway, I’m still not 100% sure how it happened, but the last room we went to in the base? It was locked, dead-bolted. I couldn’t get it open, so Loki used a bit of magic to unlock it. But as soon as we stepped through, the door slammed behind us, we heard a hiss, and we were knocked out. Next thing we knew, we woke up in an apartment in Brooklyn that belonged to another version of me. A lonely, grumpy me who had a vibranium arm which looked a lot more comfortable than this junk.” He waved his arm up and down for emphasis.

At this point, Steve noticed how Loki’s eyes had glazed over. He put a hand over hers. “Hey, are you okay? What is it?”

She blinked a few times. “I got my seiðr back? How?”

“Well shit.” Tony cursed. “That hadn’t even occurred to me. She came back with her powers already; you wouldn’t have them yet. Did she even tell us how?”

“She took the sword, too.” Peter looked down, shaking his head. “Does that mean you can’t get your powers back?”

Loki was shaking. Without the experiences that had shaped her other self, she was lost, scared, confused once more. She shook Steve’s hand off of her own, and strode out of the room.

“Oh for… She’s back to running away again, isn’t she.” Tony shook his head. “I thought we were over the emo phase. Go get her, Pete. Or at least talk her down a bit; you’re probably the only one who can.”

“You got it, Mr. Stark.” He ran after her.

Bucky coughed to get attention again. “It might be for the best. The next part of the story gets a bit intense, and she wasn’t there for it. I think maybe she doesn’t need to hear all of it now. Shit, I’m still trying to process how I spent two months away in five minutes.”

The attention was turned back to him as he began recounting the misadventures he and Loki— the other Loki— had in the multiverse.

As soon as the debriefing finished, Bucky ran for the lab where Jane would be working.

He flung open the door, coming up behind to hug her, burying his face in her hair.

“God, I missed you so much, sweetheart.”

Jane giggled. “You were only gone two days! But I’ll gladly take the affection.” She turned around to face him, and saw the fatigue in his eyes, and something else which struck her as wrong. “Was your hair always this long?”

“Jane, something terrible happened, and I’m not sure how to deal with it.”

She took his hand, pulling him over to the couch set up in the break area. “Tell me.”

He held nothing back, describing the events he had experienced over two months in another universe, to coming back to find a different Loki.

Jane had her hand over her mouth. “Oh no… Steve. He must be devastated.”

Bucky nodded. “But at least she knows who he is. Even likes him. She doesn’t know me at all. Or you, or Sam, or anyone else who came after that day.” Bucky sighed. “Especially after what we just went through? Hell, she’d rescued me, freed my mind from HYDRA’s brainwashing. After Steve, she was my best friend. But for me? She’s gone.”

“Bucky. We’ll get through this. Loki is still alive; we’ll just have to get to know her again. It’s overwhelming, it seems impossible. But she’s still the same person, isn’t she? To a point.” Jane pulled Bucky’s head into her lap and stroked his hair. She stared off into the distance. Wasn’t it Loki who had got her to this point? Just how much of what their life had become was because of the chaotic goddess? She wanted her lover to feel better, but this was a kind of trauma that had no precedent.

“Loki. There you are.” Peter mimicked Loki’s position as he sat down, cross-legged on the balcony floor. He leaned his head against her shoulder while wrapping his arm around the other side, pulling her into what he hoped was a comforting embrace.

They sat in silence for a while, Peter trying to keep himself from saying too much. This was an insane situation, but he still knew Loki well enough to know that she would have to be the one to speak first. And she did.

“What even is love? How does one know they are in love? It must be some force to be reckoned with if it let me summon so much power.”

She continued to stare out at the Manhattan skyline, and Peter bit his tongue to stop himself from answering her rhetorical question. What did he know about it anyway? He wasn’t even eighteen for another few months.

Which did mean he was maybe 15 when she last saw him? He wasn’t sure how much, but he had definitely grown in that time. That had to be a bit of a shock. The only person who would have changed more dramatically in her eyes would be the seven-months pregnant Pepper.

Food for thought.

“It has been years for everyone else. Peter, do you remember what I was like when Steven was first awoken?”

Peter chuckled softly. “You seemed like you were afraid of him! But I think it was more that you were afraid you weren’t good enough for him. But he’s not like that! He always liked you, whatever you did. I think maybe that’s what love is.”

Loki turned to look at him, a fond smile creeping to her face before she ruffled his hair. “How is it that the wisest one of us is also the youngest? Odin had to lose an eye for his wisdom, but yours did not require you to so much as age.”

“I’m just a good listener, I guess. Then I tell people what they already want to hear.”

Loki’s smile broadened as she let out a rare, genuine laugh. Peter’s face lit up in answer, and they shared the moment until Loki had begun to come back down to herself.

Chapter Text

It was later in the evening when Bucky decided to check on Steve. He knocked on the door to his and Loki’s— no, just his— apartment.

“Come in.”

Bucky did, plopping down on the couch next to his friend. He didn’t say anything, just made his presence known.

“I don’t know how to do this. I don’t want to start over. But that’s what she did, isn’t it? That’s how this happened. She started us over.” He sighed. “If what Tony was explaining is true, and she made a new universe, what happened to the other me? The one she left behind to come here? She said they weren’t engaged yet, and they had been separated for months. But does that mean eternity?”

Bucky hummed.

“I ate the damned apple, Buck. I looked in her eyes and believed her, that we had a future, that I would spend the rest of my life and hers together. We wouldn’t have to be alone anymore. What happens now? This Loki… She’s the one that I knew up until, well, you know. It isn’t like there weren’t feelings already just… So much has happened. And I don’t think I’ll ever be strong enough to reconcile this. I can’t forget the last two years, the woman I fell in love with. But this is still Loki. I was already in love with her. I just… Don’t know if she can handle the pressure of what has already been. And, well, the idea of having a fiancée one minute and then just a… friend?” He buried his face in his hands. “Fuck, I don’t even have the ring, or anything.”

Bucky reached into his pocket, and pulled out a familiar piece of jewelry.

“I found this in my pocket when we got back. I think… She knew. And she must have wanted you to have it.”

Steve grabbed the ring, and broke down sobbing. Bucky put an arm around his friend and let him cry it out.

Once Steve’s sobs had subsided somewhat, he pulled something else out of his jacket.

“I also found these.” Bucky held out two envelopes. One was marked ‘Steve’ in Loki’s distinct cursive. The other read ‘ᛚᛟᚲᛁ’, which they could only assume was meant for this Loki.

Steve took the envelopes, scrutinizing them. He opened the one with his name, pulling out postcards from kitschy tourist attractions.

“Maybe they’re meant to be an explanation? I dunno. But I thought maybe you should be the one to give Loki’s to her— like a peace offering.”

Steve nodded, reading the descriptions on the cards, wondering when and why Loki would have been to these particular places.

Fallingwater. Auburn Cord Duesenberg Museum. Anderson Japanese Garden. The SPAM Museum. Sturgis Motorcycle Rally. Target Field.

It plotted out like a road trip, the kind he could only dream of these days. When did superheroes get time off like that?

Bucky stood up, scratching the back of his head awkwardly. “I’ll, uh, leave you to them.”

“Thanks, Buck. For everything.”

“Anything for you, pal. End of the line.”

Mill Run, Pennsylvania

Dearest Steven,

If you are reading this, then my fears have been confirmed. 

I have been whisked away by the James— Bucky— of this universe, in order to “clear my head”: Strange’s orders.

I resisted at first but agree now that time away from the problem helps. Sitting on the back of a motorcycle leaves a lot of time for thinking, not for reading.

It is strange how a person can at once be so similar and yet so different; our James has certainly been more fortunate; he had us from the beginning. Here, he is very much alone and it has taken its toll.

I hope you never have to read these words. Know this: I love you. But I’m afraid I ruined my chance to be happy with you.

Loki

Auburn, Indiana

Last night Bucky and I went to a baseball game in Fort Wayne. It was a minor league team, called the TinCaps. They were playing a team called the Quad Cities River Bandits. I am starting to think that they find very silly names in order to attract more fans to these games— it was very fun but of course cannot compare to the size and grandeur of the Majors. Although I’m sure your memories of stadiums long gone are even better still.

L

Rockford, Illinois

Steven,

Have you ever been to a Japanese garden? I was not sure what to expect from such a place. What it had was an immaculate sense of calm, ‘zen’ as they called it. Everything is precisely placed but meant to seem natural, as if the location for each tree, rock, even stream was in perfect harmony.

It lends itself very well to meditation, but also to other thoughts that might linger.

I may give you these cards either way. Perhaps if only to remember this experience, and how it changed me.

Loki

Pipestone, Minnesota

Dear Steven,

I am told that SPAM is a food that many soldiers lived on during your war— were you one of them? Of course, I have no way of knowing if that is as true in our universe. I’ve never seen it before. It was amusing to find an entire museum dedicated to canned meat.

When we left Austin, it was still bright outside although it was late afternoon. I suppose the more northern latitudes lend themselves to later sunsets, especially in the summer. Travelling west felt like chasing the sun, and I feel as though travelling by motorcycle is truly a revealing experience. I wonder if I could ever learn to drive my own?

I doubt Bucky would let me try on his. He treats it like his child.

All of my love,

Loki

Sturgis, South Dakota

Steven,

The motorcycle rally here was meant to be our destination all along. Having reached the goal is almost bittersweet, for I find that I have truly enjoyed Bucky’s company. I cannot quite explain just how, but he is different in a way that is endearing, but also heartbreaking. Perhaps because I have not been in his mind I am learning about him from a different perspective than I did with James. I do not know everything he has been through, nor do I know his trauma, grief, and pain.

And indeed there is pain. You may wonder, what about you? I don’t know if James would want to mention it; I think he would rather avoid the topic. Bucky is not so lucky.

The Steven Rogers of this universe had a chance to travel through time, and decided to spend his life with Peggy Carter. I cannot begin to imagine how it felt to be left behind, but on the other hand… I am no better in what I have done. Love truly makes fools of us all, does it not?

You see, I have finally realized what I did wrong. I abandoned one version of you for another, and so have lost you both.

I found myself alone, scared, and truly believing that I would never again see the man I had just realized I loved. I never knew what love was until I lost it. I did not see a future where I would be allowed to return to him. So I was reckless. Too much power for me to hold, I tried my own form of time travel. But while the other Steven was able to simply exist (since his double was in the ice), I had to replace myself. I created a new timeline; another branch, another universe. It was not another chance, just a temporary solution. The problem with my seiðr is that it is chaos. Without a spell, without focus, I could not know the consequences of my actions until it was too late.

I left my universe without a Loki to travel to another. That Steve will never reunite with me.

I arrived in yours, and took my chance at happiness. I think we were happy. I was ready to devote myself to you, and could hardly believe you had chosen the same. But I was a fool to think I deserved it. In creating a new timeline, I took the earlier version of myself out of the picture. But if I’m right— that is the Loki you have now. A point where I was in love with you even if I did not yet realize it, and I certainly had no idea you felt the same. I had only been burned before, and was scared of letting my heart into the hands of another. I had not found my magic again. And if it is that Loki who is in your timeline now, remember that I ran away from you when you were trying to be my friend. That I had only just been comfortable enough to spend time with you. 

But even then, I knew I cared about you. Perhaps I did not yet realize that I loved you, but I did. Be patient with her, and you can find the happily ever after that I denied myself. Is it any stranger than my story?

When she believes in you, and herself, she will find her seiðr. 

I miss you, but you will have me as you were meant to.

Loki

Minneapolis, Minnesota

Steven,

There is so much I will never be able to say, but I don’t think I should say it either.

Do not think about the “what if” or the “might have been.”

You are worthy of the gift you were given, and were I still King of Asgard I would name you the God of Loyalty.

And myself the Goddess of Chaos.

There is no guarantee. But if you are reading this now, then it is too late to change it.

And I need you to know— If I am stuck in this universe, I am not alone.

The Loki here was considered a villain by most. In fact, his first encounter with Steven was in battle. He died a hero to the people of Asgard, who had only just survived Ragnorök. But indeed he is gone, making this a universe without a Loki. Until now.

I have learned that my male form resembles this universe’s Loki, who usually presented as male. So I can freely use my female form without fear of recognition. Thor in this universe truly misses his brother, and I know he would gladly take me as a substitute. He has adopted a daughter who also has taken a liking to me.

I think my heart might be pulling me somewhere else.

Knowing now that I have no way back, I have been more attentive to Bucky. His behaviour during this trip seems to tell me that he would be sad to see me leave. He does not have much keeping him grounded in this world; there are no more Avengers, his Steve is truly an old man who will never again be the same, and he is truly in need of a friend. This trip turned him from a grumpy loner into someone who was smiling, joking… Dare I say flirting?

We went to another baseball game, this time the Minnesota Twins, which he informed me were the Washington Senators in your youth. We had a friendly argument, and he asked someone nearby to settle it. That isn’t the part that was stirring something in me.

It was when he referred to me using the words ‘my gal.’

Steven, believe me, I would not have made such mistakes if not for my love of you. I want you to take your second chance with the old Loki, and make sure she knows exactly how you feel about her.

But you do not need to fear what will become of me. I will find my way in this new universe, one way or another.

And just maybe, I will learn to be happy.

Please tell everyone I will miss them. Tell James that I am sorry for deceiving him, and I hope in getting to know the Loki without his memories that he can still have a good friend.

And tell Peter how much I appreciate him. No one seems to know him in this universe, so I am determined to find him too.

I won’t tell you to forget about me. But give the other me the chance to fall for you as I did.

Loki

Chapter Text

Loki woke up with a start, looking around the unfamiliar room. It took her a moment to remember.

This wasn’t her room. Her old room was apparently occupied by Samuel, one of the newer Avengers. Because she had somehow time travelled, and another version of herself had lived through the last two years.

And had not only moved in with Steven, but had been engaged to him.

She supposed she had some idea now what it had been like for him when he awoke from the ice, only there wasn’t as long of a gap— and there hadn’t been another version of him living his life. Perhaps it was more akin to amnesia, then.

She was certainly aware of her own quirks. It was nice to think her feelings had not been unrequited after all, but would he ever see her as the same woman he was in love with? Well, when something goes wrong, she could always trust herself to be at the centre of it all.

Feeling restless, she decided to go to the kitchen and perhaps find something to eat, take her mind off the precarious situation she found herself in.

Of course, avoiding situations was never Loki’s forte.

As she entered the kitchen, Steven was already there pouring himself a cup of coffee. When he turned at the sound of her entering, he froze in place, unsure what to do next.

“Oh, this isn’t going to get easier if you keep tiptoeing around me!”

He sighed. “You do have a point.” Steve set his coffee on the counter, before retrieving an envelope and handing it to her. “This… Well, Bucky found it when he came back from that other universe. I think it must be for you.” He gestured at the runes on the envelope.

“Ah, yes. That does seem like something I’d do.” She eyed the writing suspiciously, before suddenly deciding it was, in fact, her own.

Tomah, Wisconsin

Honestly, what can I say to myself? Your life and mine diverged at that picnic, and you missed two years that you cannot get back.

You will get your seiðr back. You will find Lævateinn where you find your heart, when you find your confidence and trust.

If that sounds cryptic, remember who is writing this.

Steven has already devoted his life to you. He willingly partook of Iðunn’s apples, and is a man of incredible fidelity. I trust you to take care of him as he will strive to do the same for you.

I know patience is not our strong suit but you must have it. James, Samuel, and Jane are all very wonderful people, and it is worth the chance to know them, even if they have to get to know you again. Michelle is a treasure and a perfect companion to Peter.

I won’t pretend the path ahead is easy, because I am the one who made it difficult.

But don’t let that stop you.

I will be okay. And you will be wonderful. Just don’t do anything stupid.

As she finished reading the letter, Loki sighed deeply. “I am the worst.”

Steve studied her for a moment, trying to decide how to even begin. There was no handbook for this situation. It wouldn’t get any easier though.

He cleared his throat. “We should talk. I don't want you to feel as though I’m trying to force you into anything.

Loki looked up at him, a curious look on her face. “From the sound of it, I seem to be the one who forced you.”

“Loki, please don’t think that. I was smitten with you from the day I woke up and saw you at my bedside. You must remember how you were afraid to even talk to me that first week. I kept that paper from the fortune cookie… Because even then I thought it was inevitable.”

Loki hummed. “Destiny? Fate? Like the Norns willed it should be so? Seeing how much I seem to have done to avoid fate, it seems foolish to attribute this to them.”

Steve looked at her thoughtfully, trying to bring himself back to that moment, when their relationship had become something more, when they first kissed in the park. That was when Loki had switched places, wasn’t it? “What do you remember about the picnic, before you woke up in the base with Bucky?”

Loki thought for a moment. “We had wine. I was painting the cherry blossoms. You were sketching.”

“Did you see what I was sketching?”

Loki shook her head. Steve motions for her to wait a moment while he goes to retrieve his old sketchbook. When he comes back into the kitchen, he hands it to Loki, open to the sketch he had drawn of her that day.

Loki stares in amazement. “This… You were sketching me?”

“I told you, I was in love with you long before that. I was just… scared. If you had seen this then,” he asks somewhat warily, “would you have let me kiss you?”

By way of answer, she walks closer to him, standing on her tiptoes, and kisses him gently on the lips.

He pulled back, his hands on her shoulders, blue eyes piercing green. “Loki. Are you sure you want this? It has to be overwhelming to feel like you’ve been asleep for two years.”

“Steven, I… I wanted you too. I was always too much a coward to say so. I don’t want to make you start from the beginning again.” She looked down a moment, seeming to search for words. “How about the middle?”

Steve smiled gently. “I can do that.” He pulled her in for another kiss, this one becoming more passionate, much like the one they hadn’t shared at the picnic.

As they pulled away again, Loki stared into his eyes. “I guess I can thank the other me for one thing.”

“Oh?”

“I don’t have to worry about falling in love with a mortal.”

Steve smiled gently before cupping her face in his hands, pulling her in for another kiss, saying far more than he ever could with words.

Heimdall’s eyes snapped open. 

Loki. She had been concealing herself from his sight since she last left Asgard. Why would she change her mind? He looks at her.

She is as she was before. When she had not yet regained her powers. Was this a consequence of her reckless magic?

He had no choice but to notify the All-father.

“What are you saying, gatekeeper?” Odin demanded.

“That whatever Loki was the last time she was on Asgard, she was not of this time. The Loki that should have been— the Loki that was banished, whose seiðr was sealed away, is once more in her place.”

Odin frowned, but it was Frigga who spoke.

“How could this have happened, Heimdall? What has become of my daughter?”

“I could not say for certain, my queen. The sorcery Loki used to conceal herself from my sight has dissipated, and whatever power she used before seems to have resolved itself.”

Concern crossed Frigga’s features.

“And what of her betrothed?” Odin finally asked.

“He is unchanged, your majesty.”

Odin sighed in discontent. “Summon Thor. It is time for him to check in on his sister once again.” Heimdall nodded, before his image disappeared.

Frigga looked carefully at her husband. “What will you do? Will you make her stay without her seiðr now that she has lost it again?”

Odin grunted. “She has much to answer for. I have not forgotten her insolence.”

Frigga looked away, tears threatening to spill down her cheeks.

“What do you want to know?” Jane looked at Loki with a mix of curiosity and disbelief. 

“It would be pointless to say ‘everything,’ so perhaps just what you think most important.” Loki said in a serious tone. “I don’t know anything about you, or your relationship with the other me… But I would like to think whatever that was can be recovered to some extent.”

Jane frowned, wondering where to even begin. “Who else have you talked to? I know I’m not the only new face for you.”

“You are the first.”

Jane was about to protest when the lab door opened to reveal Darcy holding a tray with two coffees in one hand, her eyes glued to the phone in her other. “Hey, Janie, got our drinks. Looks like we’re in for another busy day.” She finally looked up as she sat the coffees on at table. “Oh, hey Lokes. Didn’t know you were going to be here today. Woulda brought you something too.”

Jane swallowed loudly. Right, Darcy had been on vacation until yesterday; nobody had thought to tell her, had they? Jane felt a tinge of guilt; she should have at least texted her! She had been so wrapped up in consoling Bucky…

Loki stared at Darcy with a questioning look, no recognition in her green eyes.

“Uhhh, missed you too?” Darcy gave her a look of her own, more teasing than angry.

Jane was going to have to step in and own up to her mistake. “Hey Darce, can I talk to you for a sec? Outside?”

“Uh, yeah.” Loki looked up curiously as the two of them stepped into the hallway.

Jane furrowed her brow, crossing and uncrossing her arms, trying to think how to even start this conversation.

“Alright Janie, I know that look. Just spit it out, rip off that bandaid, all that stuff. I can take it.” Darcy’s lighthearted tone was a direct contrast to the seriousness of the situation, making Jane frown even more.

“Loki doesn’t know who you are.”

“O…kay? Did she get hit with some kind of brain zapper? Forgetting ray? Mind gun? Is it just me? That just seems likes a personal attack.” Darcy still tried to keep a semi-jovial note in her voice; years of being around all kinds of weird shit tended to make one take it in stride.

Jane shook her head, looking down and pinching the bridge of her nose. Her voice was barely a whisper. “It’s so much worse than that.”

Before Darcy could reply, they were interrupted by the door opening, and a sheepish Loki looking between them. “I’ll just… Come back later. Sorry.” She then started to head toward the elevator.

Jane called after her. “Loki, wait!”

Loki just waved and was soon out of sight.

Jane sighed. “Well Darcy, turns out that Loki was even better at sorcery than she thought. We might as well go back in and I’ll try to explain.”

Chapter Text

“You need to talk to them, kiddo.” Tony looked across the desk at Loki, who was fidgeting with some bracelets on her wrist. “What’re those?”

She had about a dozen bracelets of different patterns, all in varying shades of green, gold, and black. “Peter called them friendship bracelets. He made this one,” she held one with green and black stripes, “and taught me how to make my own. Keeps my hands busy.”

“I’ll say. You’ve got even more ants in your pants than usual. You ever stop moving?”

“Peter’s girlfriend said it was called ‘stimming’ or something like that.” Loki kept her eyes focused on the bracelets, picking at the fraying threads.

“Isn’t that an autism thing? Do they have autism on Asgard?”

Loki shrugged.

Tony appraised her for a moment. “That girl is pretty smart, she might be on to something. It would explain an awful lot…” Loki finally looked up. “We’ll save that thought for another time. Now, as much as I want you to get to know everyone again, especially the ones you haven’t met, I’m afraid you’re going to have to start with our little cowboy, I can’t stand him when he’s moping.”

Loki frowned. “And I am supposed to guess who you mean by that, I assume.”

“Right. You know even less about culture now. Guess I get to introduce you to stuff all over again.” He stared off, attention drifting for a moment while he thought what he should start with. “Anyway. Buckaroo.” Blank stare. “Bucky?” Still nothing. “Barnes. I mean Barnes. He’s beating himself up over this, thinks somehow it’s his fault; as if he knows any magic.”

“I think it has been well established whose fault this is.”

“So talk to him. Get to know him. You’ll be thick as thieves soon enough.”

She nodded, standing and leaving the room without a glance back at him.

Tony sighed. This was a disaster. Not that that was out of the ordinary around here, especially when Loki was involved.

“All right, I declare this meeting of the ‘People Loki Doesn’t Remember Club’ in session!” In lieu of a gavel, Darcy banged her fist against the table, wincing at the impact. “Wait, Peter, why are you here?”

“Moral support?”

Darcy shrugged and looked at the others assembled around the table, the variety of expressions showing just how annoyed they were to be summoned away from their work for this. MJ had her usual sarcastic smirk, Sam a trademark indulgent grin, Bucky his usual stare, Jane rolling her eyes at her friend’s antics, and Rhodey letting out a sigh before speaking.

“Look, I know this is some freaky shit, because it usually is with Loki, but what exactly are you hoping to accomplish here?”

“I dunno. Solidarity? Commiserating?”

Sam huffed out a laugh. “I don’t think it’s all that deep, Darce. Loki is still Loki, ain’t she? Just pretend it’s a bit of memory loss and get to know her again, same as before. We can handle it. Just think! Anything embarrassing you’ve ever said or done in front of her? Gone!”

“Oh, that is pretty convenient.” Bucky muttered.

“I am definitely not planning to abuse that information.” MJ deadpanned.

“Oh no.” Peter squeaked.

Not quite ready to actually move in (or was it move back in?) with Steven, Loki still found herself in his apartment most days, a tug in her chest telling her this was her only solid connection to the life she didn’t get to lead.

Steve was reading, sat at one end of the couch while Loki laid across it with her head in his lap. He was running the fingers of his free hand through her hair absentmindedly, leaving Loki practically purring like a kitten under the affection.

She looked up and caught his eye. “What is it, sweetheart?”

“How do I become friends with someone who already knows all about me? I don’t even know where to start. I feel terrible as it is, seeing the look of recognition only to have no idea who they are. Tony thinks I should start with James, but seeing how hurt he was when I didn’t recognize him before…”

“Hey, c’mon. That wasn’t about you. If anything, I think he was more terrified about how he was gonna tell me.”

“Because I’m not the right Loki.”

Steve put his book down, and moved her head to face him. “Stop. That is not true. If you keep going down that road…”

“But that’s who I want to be. I want to be the Loki you see when you look at me. I want to be the Loki you’re in love with. The one you want to marry, the one you spend eternity with. What good is it if I have to keep looking over my shoulder to the ghost of another me that haunts your memories? I want to be enough for you. To be the one whose memory means the most. Even if we have to build all those memories again. However long it takes. I want you to love me the way I love you.” Loki looked down, her face seemingly unconvinced by her own words.

He pulled her up, putting his arms around her in a tight embrace before murmuring in her ear. “You are the Loki I fell in love with. So another Loki came from the future and messed things up a bit for both of us. But you know what? It means that we both had a push to actually admit our feelings out loud. From what she told us of her original timeline, they had only just started their relationship in earnest before she was pulled back to Asgard, separated from her Steve. We won’t let that happen— we’re together, however that might be, for as long as you can put up with me.”

“You sound so certain.”

“Listen kid, I don’t go around eating magic apples for every girl I see.”

He pulled back with his hands on her shoulders to see a smile spread across her face.

“Maybe I do still have that silver tongue they always joked about, if I can convince an old, decrepit man like you to become immortal.”

“Unbelievable.” He muttered before pressing his lips to hers and swallowing her giggles in a kiss.

“James… Can we talk?”

At the sound of Loki’s voice Bucky looked up from his breakfast, eggs falling back to the plate. “Uhh, sure thing. Pull up a seat.” He motioned across the table. “So, what’s on your mind?”

She let out a sharp breath from her nose. “Making up for what I missed. And I think that starts with you.”

Bucky was a bit confused by that proclamation. “Not sure what you mean, doll. You don’t have to do anything for me.”

“But I do. You think it’s your fault, what happened? It isn’t. I have been known to be hot-headed and irresponsible; in fact, it’s how I ended up here in the first place. What is missing is apparently the fact that you shared some kind of… Mental connection with this other me.”

He quirked the corners of his mouth up at that. “If you mean she went in my mind to deprogram me and then I recklessly broke into her memories, then yes.”

“I see. And those memories you saw…?”

He hesitated a moment. “Well, some were from her original timeline. I might be the only one who knows anything about what happened there, everything she went through before… Well, you know. But the first thing I saw, I guess would still be your memory, because you were just a kid.”

“Then it appears you have me at a disadvantage now. I hope it wasn’t anything too salacious.”

Now Bucky just laughed outright. “I literally meant you were a child! You were hiding under some azalea bushes, crying because you stabbed Thor after turning into a snake.”

At that, Loki smiled fondly. “I suppose it could have been much worse.”

“I don’t doubt it.”

“I hope we can still be friends. I suppose now I have to get to know you a bit better then.”

“Hey, don’t let my insecurities get you down.” Bucky was aiming for some sincerity. “I think I just couldn’t take a hint in that other universe— she knew she wasn’t comin’ back, that’s why she wrote those letters. I just hope she’s not too miserable. Although if I was readin’ him right…” He trailed off, wondering if it might be a bad idea to tell her about Other Bucky.

“Who? About what?” She asked insistently, and Bucky hoped he wouldn’t regret bringing it up.

“The me in that universe. He looked more like I did back in the day, short hair and scruffy face. And he wasn’t exactly shy about… Being attracted to her.”

“Oh.” Loki blinked. “Oh.”

“Yeah, that was weird for me too. Maybe it’s because of being in her head? Seeing how much she loved Stevie. I never thought of her as anything more than a good friend, a brother-in-arms.

Loki paled. “Wait. Does everyone else know?”

Bucky knit his brows in confusion. “About what?”

“I hadn’t revealed my… Shapeshifting abilities to everyone yet. And I haven’t shown anyone my… True nature. At least from my perspective.”

“Oh shit. That didn’t occur to me. Nah, everyone knows about your gender stuff. The true nature thing? Is that the one where you’re blue?”

She grimaced. “My Jötunn heritage at work.”

Bucky hummed. “I saw it in her head, but… I don’t know if anyone else knows. I got the impression it was known in her original timeline, but those circumstances didn’t repeat themselves here. I mean, they knew she wasn’t Asgardian, but I don’t know if she ever showed anyone.”

She was even quieter now. “Did Steven see?”

Ah. That was quite a pickle. “I don’t know. But I hope she would at least show him.”

Loki nodded, lost in thought.

“Uhh, I won’t say anything. You’d better come to it on your own terms.”

“Indeed. Thank you, James.” She stood abruptly, headed toward the elevator.

Bucky turned his attention back to his breakfast, worried for his best friends.

Thanks to his enhanced hearing, Steve could hear the scratching of the needle on a record before he even reached the door to his apartment. Loki was already there.

He smiled to himself as he heard the familiar tune.

Don’t sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me

Anyone else but me, anyone else but me no, no, no

Don’t sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me

Till I come marching home

Apples, huh?

He opened the door slowly, hoping to surprise her, but instead he was the one getting the shock.

Yes, he knew she was a Frost Giant. Or Jötunn, as they were called. But even after that revelation, when she had shown him male and androgynous forms, she did not show her Jötunn form to him. He’d never pressed her to, either.

But there on his couch sat Loki, deep blue skin and hair to match. When she turned to face him, rubies had replaced the emeralds of her eyes.

“Wow.” Was all Steve could manage as he took in the sight.

Loki sighed. “So she didn't show you, then.”

“I never pressed her on it. She’d described it, but. Can you stand up? I want a better look at all of you.”

Loki did so, averting her eyes from his.

He hummed thoughtfully. “You don’t like it, do you?”

She grimaced. “Not particularly. But it didn’t seem right to have hidden it from you, of all people.”

He smiled, putting his right hand on her shoulder and using the left to lift her chin, looking straight into her eyes. “I’m glad you showed me. I know you’re uncomfortable, but if you’re willing, there’s something I’d like to do before you change again.”

“Oh?”

“Stretch out on the couch. I’ll be right back.” He went to grab his sketchbook and a set of coloured pencils. He usually preferred graphite, but this was going to require extra detail.

He sat across from her. “You can pose however you want. I just want you to see yourself from my point of view.”

Loki seemed startled, but propped her head up on her arm and stared at him.

Steve chuckled and got to work.

Chapter Text

Frigga’s visit to Midgard would be twofold.

She needed to see Loki; see how she had changed. And of course, remind her that she is still loved and cared for, whatever might have happened.

However, she also would fulfil her role as Goddess of Childbirth for Loki’s dear friends Virginia and Anthony. It was they who had taken her in when Loki first arrived on Midgard, and Frigga believed it to be the least she could do to properly thank them.

Of course, she worried. As much for Loki as for her lover, Steven. Would he feel betrayed by this change in Loki? He had proven himself to be both loyal and open-minded; but after having consumed Iðunn’s apple the rest of his life was a much longer span of time to face.

Well, she could be certain her reckless daughter had not changed so much in a short span of time as to make things impossible, in any case.

Thor and the All-Mother approached the citadel where Heimdall stood watch. Thor was set to accompany her as he had previously been a visitor to their home, which would hopefully smooth over Frigga’s arrival on Midgard. If Loki had been herself— or rather, the last version they had seen— no doubt they would be anticipating her arrival. Who could truly know what was going through her mind, now that she found herself with two years missing.

Perhaps she could be nudged in the direction of finding her seiðr once again.

“Doctor Foster, the conditions you specified have been detected.” JARVIS’ voice pierced the air of the apartment, where she quickly sat up in bed.

“Thanks!” Jane threw the blanket off and ran for her dresser getting some clothes.

“That was vague as hell. What time is it?” Bucky’s groggy voice drifted to her.

“Mmm, 5:20. And that’s the bridge! Thor must be coming!”

Bucky suddenly sat bolt upright. “Thor? Shit, we gotta tell Lokes! She’s gonna be spooked as hell to see him!” He jumped out of the covers to dress himself. “J, send her a message, tell her to meet us on the balcony.”

“Message sent, Sergeant Barnes.”

Jane and Bucky rushed to the common area and outside in time to see the Bifröst touch down, revealing not only Thor, but an older woman. She had both a comforting presence and an ethereal beauty which could only belong to—

“Mother.” Loki’s voice was shaky as she walked onto the balcony, her emotions overwhelmed.

“My daughter.” Frigga made her way to Loki, enveloping her in a tight embrace. “You have been through so much.” She glanced up to see Steven hovering behind, somewhat awkwardly.

“Ma’am. Your Majesty.” He clearly was not comfortable with the whole royalty thing, but she smiled forgivingly.

“Steven.” Frigga beamed at him, causing Loki to do a double-take. Jane realized that she would not have been present when they had met before. “I do hope my daughter has not scared you away. She has always been intense when it comes to her own feelings.”

“Nothing Loki could do would scare me away. I’ll be here for here as long as she’ll have me.” He beamed right back.

Loki let out an awkward cough. “I think I may have missed something important here. Or perhaps—”

Frigga’s smile turned indulgent as she faced Loki. “You will figure it out soon. And as much as I would love to spend time with the two of you, I am here in another capacity. Where is Virginia?”

Jane looked at Bucky, who shrugged. After a beat, Steven’s eyes lit up in recognition. “The Goddess of Childbirth! I remember now. I imagine she and Tony are still asleep at this hour, though.”

Frigga hummed. “Well, then I should begin preparing.”

Tony was sulking outside of the door. “She kicked me out.” He turned toward the group gathered around him, giving Thor a dirty look, before turning to Loki. “Your mom kicked me out, Elsa!”

“I am certain she has her reasons.” Loki murmured indifferently. “Childbirth is the realm of women, after all.”

“We have doctors, you know. Pep would have been fine.”

Loki hummed in agreement. “Take it as a compliment. She does not by rule attend to mortal mothers.”

Thor cleared his throat. “The All-Mother wished to repay your kindness. For taking care of Loki.”

Tony’s head snapped to face the Thunderer. “What?”

“Your child will be blessed with the protection of Asgard, as you took care of my sister when she arrived on this realm.” Thor’s grin was wide, while Loki seemed to be hiding her face in her hands. Somewhere in the background Steve was shaking his head, lost in thought.

“Protection of Asgard, huh?” Tony quirked up the side of his mouth. “Not even born yet and this kid’s got heroes from two planets on her side. I’m one lucky son of a bitch.”

The sound of a baby’s wails cut through his reverie, and the door opened to reveal an exhausted Pepper, with baby Morgan cooing up at her mother.

“The luckiest.” Tony repeated, taking in the scene before him.

“You mustn’t think that way, Loki.”

Loki was startled, turning to see her mother behind her, a soft smile across her features. She had retreated to her room to find some solitude, but should have expected this. “I did not say anything.”

“You did not have to. You cannot hide your moods from me, daughter.”

“You knew. You knew I had made a mistake, that I am different, not the same Loki that—”

Frigga knelt in front of Loki, pulling her into an embrace. Loki rested her head on her mother’s shoulder, sobbing softly. Frigga began running her fingers through the long black hair that splayed messily. “Of course you are. The Norns have a strange way of tying fate together. You had not yet retrieved your seiðr, and then suddenly had it without fulfilling your father’s conditions. It was inevitable that something would break. You have only now to find it again; what it is that makes you Loki.”

“What makes me worthy, you mean. I’m not worthy, am I? Not of my magic, and certainly not of—”

“Steven loves you unconditionally. You have to let him. You have to… Trust in that love. You are not destined to be alone, my darling.” She cupped the side of Loki’s face, pulling it to look into her green eyes, glossy with tears. “The next birth I attend to will be my grandchild’s. Do not make me wait forever.” She smiled, and Loki let out a sharp laugh.

“Oh, is Thor getting married?”

Frigga shook her head, before wrapping her arms tighter around Loki. “My daughter, you are worthy of all the love you have. I wish only you could see it so clearly as I do.”

“Captain, I wish to speak with you.”

Steve turned around from where he was leaning against the balcony, staring off into the setting sun. Thor stood there, his expression unreadable.

“Of course. What’s on your mind?”

“I am hoping that you could tell me more of what has happened to my sister.”

Steve let out a heavy breath. “I’m not sure I entirely understand it myself. But you remember the first time you came here? How different she was then? Well, whatever she did, it didn’t work out how she planned. I’m pretty sure Strange was on the right track back then, but once she woke up again Buck and I just sort of… Ignored it. Until it came back around, and suddenly we have a Loki who never lived the last two years, and the other one… Is in another universe, and she can’t come back.” Steve looked down. “It’s been difficult, but it has to be even worse for her, right? She feels like she isn’t enough, and that’s not true. She didn’t go through the good or the bad things that made the other Loki do what she did, which means she won’t have to. It will take time for both of us to find our balance again, but we will. She’s still the same person I fell in love with. And I’ll be there with her as long as it takes.” As he monologued, he turned back to lean on the railing and stare off across the Manhattan skyline. Thor stood next to him, silently absorbing his words.

“I am glad she is in such capable hands. You are part of our world now, whenever you wish you may call upon the Bifröst to travel to Asgard, and Heimdall will answer.” He clapped Steve on the back. “Be well, my brother.”

When Pepper was feeling well enough to join everyone for dinner, the charming Morgan Stark became the most popular attendee, with most everyone begging for a chance to hold her.

Yet somehow her charms were most effective on Jane. She made faces, blew raspberries, and grabbed at her cheeks, making Jane feel something she never anticipated. She was so entranced that she hardly noticed when Bucky walked up behind her.

“She’s a real sweetheart, ain’t she?”

Jane’s face lit up. “She’s just the most precious thing I’ve ever seen!”

Bucky sat down next to her on the couch, sliding his arm around Jane’s shoulder. “I was talking to Morgan.” He grinned mischievously.

“Jamie!” Her face turned red. He kissed her on the temple.

“Hmm, I like that one. So flustered. You look awfully sweet with her, though.” He paused a moment, before reaching for Morgan and bouncing her on his lap. Sweet cooing giggles made him grin widely before he started making faces.

Jane started to stare at him adoringly, imagining him with a child of his own, how great a dad he would be…

He caught her staring, giving her a wink. “You’re doing that thing. With your brain.”

She laughed. “Thinking?”

“Yeah, but not your sciencey thinking.” Before he could elaborate, Darcy was walking over to claim her baby time, looking closely at Bucky playing before nudging Jane.

“I bet that’s got your ovaries exploding, huh?”

Jane flushed again. “Darcy!” Darcy just laughed and grabbed Morgan from Bucky.

“Who’s a good little baby? Is it you? Are you making Janie want to settle down? I think you are!” She wandered off before Jane could reply. Instead she turned to find Bucky staring at her affectionately.

“Is that something you’ve thought about? Having kids?”

“Well… I never thought I’d be in a position to have a family. I’ve always been pretty career-focused.”

Bucky hummed. “Times have changed since my day, I know, but there’s always been working mothers. Hell, Stevie’s ma was a single mom, and look how he turned out.” He chuckled. “I think the bigger change is dads wanting to be the stay-at-home parent.”

Jane startled, then looked into Bucky’s eyes, searching for something. “Is that something you’ve thought about?”

“Can’t say I’m particularly attached to my job. Got enough nightmares for a lifetime. Would rather make some good memories, if I’m honest.”

“Is that so?”

“And if I’m really honest, I want to make them with you.” Bucky reached into his pocket, pulling out a box that had been there for nearly a year.

Jane gasped.

“Marry me, Janie. I know I ain’t much but you make me happier than I’ve ever been.”

She put her hands on his cheeks and pulled him in for a kiss. “James. You are everything. Of course I’ll marry you.”

His grin was even wider as he pulled her close, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her like a drowning man searching for oxygen.

They hardly heard Tony complaining in the background.

“What the hell, Terminator? My kid can’t even be the centre of attention for a whole week?”

Chapter Text

“Wait, is she sweet on the Goblin King? But he kidnapped her brother!”

“Sure, but look at him. Those pants leave little to the imagination. I don’t blame her.” Steve stared down at Loki. “Reminds me of someone else’s tight pants.” She grinned up at him mischievously, and he flushed bright red.

“Ah.” He stammered out.

“Oh, you’re so adorable when you’re flustered.” Suddenly they were showered in popcorn.

“Get a room!”

“We’re in our room, Buck! Maybe if you two are so offended you should go back to yours!”

Jane rolled her eyes. “Pshh, you guys have more comfortable couches. Now shut up, I wanna hear this.”

“You said you’ve seen this movie a hundred times, doll.”

“Yes, and this is the best part!”

“I don’t think an extravagant wedding is the best idea for us, James.”

“Oh, thank God. I’d just as soon elope, but I suppose we at least oughta have our friends there.”

“We could have it here, like Tony and Pepper did. But maybe… A less public facing room? More low key?”

“Isn’t one Loki enough?”

Jane playfully smacked Bucky on the arm.

Loki looked warily at the motorcycle. “That is meant to transport both of us?”

Steve grinned. “Yeah, of course. You just hop on behind me, and hold on.” Loki quirked an eyebrow at that.

“Shouldn’t I be in the front, since I’m smaller?”

“Loki, doll, you’ve never been on one of these before. The front is for the driver.”

“How hard can it be to operate?”

Steve stared a moment, wondering if she was teasing. “You really want me behind you? Squeezing you tight so I don’t fall off? Think you can handle that kind of… Pressure?”

Loki gasped and admonished him. “Steven! I can’t believe this. Who knew the symbol of everything good and righteous was such a pervert!”

He broke into a laugh, then, with Loki quick to join him. “Come on, sweetheart, let’s go for a ride. I’ll teach ya another time.” He winked, hopping on the bike with Loki quick to follow.

“So for the wedding party… Just a Maid of Honour and Best Man should be enough, right?”

“It’s your day, Janie. I’m just happy to be there.”

She giggled, leaning her head on his shoulder. “It’s for both of us. I’m not marrying myself, you goofball.”

“Well, can’t say I know much about this sorta thing anyway.”

“Me neither. But I think a small ceremony means a small group at the front, right? And it’s obvious who we would choose to be there, I think.”

Bucky’s smirk threatened to break his serious expression. “We can’t both have Loki. Or can we? Can she duplicate herself? One male Loki, one female?”

Jane snorted at the image of it. “Well, since we can’t share, let’s have Darcy and Steve to be fair about it.”

“Excellent choices. Stevie will look so beautiful in his Maid of Honour dress.”

“People actually enjoy this sort of thing?”

“Relax, Loki. You might have fun too if you stop overthinking it.”

Loki huffed as he stared down the ten pins still standing, mocking him as he prepared to throw his second ball. He tried to follow the form that Steve had shown him, aiming carefully… And managed to barely avoid another gutter ball by clipping the 7 pin.

“See? Progress!” Steve then picked up his ball, gracefully throwing his third strike in a row. “Aha! A turkey!” He grinned at Loki, who rolled his eyes.

“I thought three strikes meant you were out.” Loki said with a smirk.

“Oho, does someone think he’s clever?” Steve stared Loki down for a moment before grabbing him by the waist and lifting him up. He started squirming, hands on Steve’s shoulders as he tried to escape the soldier’s crushing grasp. Steve just laughed, releasing a hand from his waist to instead pull his head in and silence Loki’s protests with an adoring kiss.

“So what’re you thinking for a reception? Just a dinner, drinks?”

“I think we need to have at least some dancing. See if we can find that charming flirt you used to be.”

“Used to…? Janie, you wound me.” She stuck out her tongue, to which he responded by tickling her sides until she surrendered.

“It’s so… Captivating.” Loki squinted at the title of the painting. The Starry Night.

“Van Gogh is highly regarded for a reason— although his story is a sad one. Never really appreciated while he was alive.”

Loki hummed at that, still lost in the brushstrokes.

“We’re pretty lucky to have a museum like this so close to home. But there’s so many other ones I’d love to visit, paintings I always dreamed about seeing in person.”

“That sounds lovely. Where would you start?”

He contemplated a moment. “I know most people would say Paris, with the Louvre, or maybe the Uffizi in Florence. But I think maybe the National Gallery in London, or the Rijksmuseum in Amsterdam. They both have paintings I admire.” Loki hummed, and Steve was encouraged to continue. “It would be easier to start closer to home though, wouldn’t it? We never travel except for missions, and I saw more of Europe during the war than anywhere else outside Brooklyn growing up. There’s still so much of this country I haven’t really seen. Even in the old days with the USO tours all I’d see is a dressing room and a motel. If I’m going to call myself Captain America, maybe I need to know more about America.”

Loki nodded sagely, turning to face him. “So where do you want to start?”

Steve thought for a moment. “Chicago. I’ve always wanted to see the big version of that painting by Seurat.”

“Like in Ferris Bueller?”

“Where should we go for our honeymoon? I don’t know how fancy we oughta be, but I’m game for anything.”

Jane broke out into a wide grin at that. “You know, I never go on vacation. I have so many ideas, I don’t even know how to start narrowing them down.”

“Well, why bother then? Let’s do all of them.”

“Bucky! It would take a few months to do everything on my list!”

“Well, good thing we have plenty of vacation time saved up.” He smirked.

Morgan had barely learned to walk, but she dutifully trailed petals behind her as she toddled down the makeshift aisle, to where Bucky was waiting nervously; impeccably dressed in a tuxedo, his hair slicked back, his face clean-shaven. Steve clapped a hand on his shoulder reassuringly, amazed they had both lived to see this day. 

It would be lying for Steve to say it wasn’t bittersweet for him. Everything that had happened with Loki— he had really thought he’d be the one married first. Still, he was so happy for his best friend. Jane was perfect for him, they complimented each other wonderfully.

He watched as Jane walked gracefully down the aisle. Maybe she could be clumsy or awkward sometimes, but right now? It was as if everyone was seeing through Buck’s eyes at this glamorous genius who for some reason had agreed to marry him. Steve smiled appreciatively, but his mind couldn’t help wandering as he caught a glimpse of Loki; a rare occasion where she wore a dress. It was, of course, a dark green, sleeveless with a modest neckline, simple in design ending just below her knees. The collar and waistline were trimmed with gold embroidery in an elongated diamond pattern.

In his mind the green faded to white and he was waiting for her to come down the aisle, the most beautiful woman he had ever seen— who for some reason agreed to marry a schmuck like him. Except…

It’s been over a year since she… We’ve gotten so close again. But would she say yes this time?

He was breaking his own heart at the possibility. That she doesn’t trust his feelings for her. That he’s still thinking of the other Loki. He only wants her to understand— there is no other Loki. They’re the same, from different points in time. He loves her, not the idea of her. All of her, every last detail that she was ashamed to reveal when they first met.

As Jane reaches the altar and the ceremony begins, Steve tries to keep his expression straight, to support his best friend on the biggest day of his life.

But he glances at Loki and her almost wistful expression, and he knows he’s doomed.

Bucky and Jane headed off for an extended honeymoon and long-overdue vacation, leaving the tower somehow quieter in their absence. Without her scientist to wrangle, Darcy was getting bored and took it upon herself to wrangle Bruce and Tony instead. Although, fatherhood had already improved Tony’s habits to some extent.

Clint and Nat were both off on long term missions; the kind the rest of the team wasn’t in the loop for.

Sam was off visiting his sister and nephews in Louisiana, while Peter and MJ were coming by less often now that they were in college and wanted to focus on their studies.

So it was eerily quiet these days, and Loki wasn’t sure how she felt about it. No major threats that required everyone’s help, most everyone left around wrapped up in projects of their own; she and Steve essentially had free rein of the common areas.

But they didn’t have a mission. No goal, no purpose. How was she supposed to crack this mysterious code that her mother and… other self had left for her? To get her seiðr back she must have faith? Trust? In who? She wanted so badly to trust Steven, to trust his feelings for her, but it was as if she couldn't even trust herself.

Oh. Is that the problem?

She was so lost in thought that she didn’t notice Steve had entered the room until she felt him plant a quick kiss on top of her head, causing her to flinch.

“Whoa, sweetheart, you alright?” His eyes searched hers, forehead creased in concern.

She winced. “Sorry, I was letting my mind wander.”

“Did it go anywhere interesting? Maybe the Misty Mountains?” He beamed at her.

She frowned for a second, sure he was referencing something.

“Not all who wander are lost. From The Hobbit?”

“Is that a book?”

Steve’s face fell. “Oh, right, that was… After. I’m… I’m sorry, Loke.”

“It is not your fault. I cannot imagine it is easy to distinguish which memories we would have shared, when I have the same face and voice as her.”

“I don’t want you to think that I’m comparing you somehow, that I see you differently or that you’re any less you for not remembering these things. We’ve made so many memories of our own since then; I still can’t imagine where I’d be if I lost you completely.”

Loki let out a soft laugh. “I guess I just need to trust that in those memories of yours, I would have made the same decision. I need to have faith in myself.” She paused, taking a deep breath before staring into the sincerity of his bright, blue eyes, smiling broadly at a realization she found there. “And I think, maybe, I finally do.”

She felt something odd, like ice cracking on a frozen lake after an early thaw. She closed her eyes for a moment, a familiar buzz crawling under her skin.

“Loki, your hands—”

She hesitated. The last time she had heard those words, her hands had turned blue. Then again, she wasn’t cold now.

She opened her eyes, to see green light dancing across her fingertips. Her seiðr. She practically cackled with laughter.

“Really? That was it? I just had to trust myself?”

Steve looked at her with a mixture of awe and adoration.

“My sword— I’ll find it where I find my heart, hmm? I’m such a smart-ass, aren’t I?”

Steve huffed out an indulgent laugh at that. “Better than a dumbass, I suppose.”

“Oh my, aren’t we mouthy today? I ought to do something about that.” She reached up with her left hand to grab him by the collar, pulling him down into a kiss. At the same time, her right hand made a complicated gesture over his chest, and suddenly from seemingly nowhere Lævateinn materialized in her hand.

“Where I find my heart. In yours.” As quickly as it appeared, she dismissed the sword, pulling Steve down so he flopped over the back of the couch, artfully landing with his arms on either side of her, propping himself up while staring incredulously.

He spoke without thinking. “Marry me, Loki.”

She smiled and shrugged, “Yeah, alright.”

Chapter Text

“MIT will be lucky to have the two of you.” Loki was trying to remain impassive as Peter and Michelle were gathering to leave after their farewell dinner at the tower.

“Oh come on Loki! Boston’s not that far.” Peter teased.

“And I can always send a jet for them if they get lonely.” Tony quipped, bouncing Morgan on his hip.

“Thanks, Dad.” Peter teased back, causing Tony to freeze. “Uh, sorry, I didn’t mean…”

Tony’s eyes glazed over, then he stared into his daughter’s with an inscrutable expression. “Did you hear that kiddo? You have some competition for my affection. You’d better start talking soon before my Spider-son gets added to the will.”

Morgan gurgled in response, reaching up to Tony’s face.

MJ burst out laughing. “Oh my god. This is the best.” She smirked at Tony. “We’ll come visit, old man, don’t worry.”

Tony didn’t even manage his usual glare at such a statement, too captivated by his charming daughter.

Peter finally broke into a cheery grin as he went up to Loki for a hug. “Gonna miss you, Loki. Make sure you invite us to the wedding.”

Loki let out a faint chuckle. “Of course. I’m going to need to you be my best man.”

How can we stop fighting? You know we have to die in battle to enter the halls of Valhalla.

The tower had seen a lot of changes recently. The Avengers weren’t the same group they had been when Loki had first arrived on this realm. With Peter away for university, the evenings he would come by and keep her company were no more. Stark’s weekly “family dinners” had more of a rotating cast than a group of regulars.

When Bucky and Jane returned from their honeymoon, they started discussing moving out into a place of their own. Of course they would still both be working out of the tower, at least for now. While neither of them said anything, it was clear after their return that they wanted to get started on making a family of their own.

Clint had planned to retire in the near future, moving back with his family in Iowa full time. He had mentioned working with another archer who might take over for him as Hawkeye, but she also looked poised to relocate to California and join up with some other heroes out there, creating a branch of West Coast Avengers.

Bruce had also been considering a move out west; he had family out there and was looking to reduce the stress that was living in New York.

Rhodes went back to being on-call some time ago. Natasha had reduced her time at the tower after reuniting with her sister; it seemed they were looking to move back to DC. Darcy had a room at the tower she used when she had late nights, but had rented an apartment when she first came to join Jane and still lived there.

While Tony and Pepper were still obviously running the place, they weren’t really needed in person day to day anymore. With Morgan running around, they were starting to consider living a bit more remote. Tony, like Clint, was ready to retire from the Avenging business.

Which left just Steve, Loki, and Sam as full time residents for the foreseeable future. They all started to wonder what would become of their team: should they be recruiting more heroes, even if they don’t live on site?

Sam was most vocal for someone moving in.

“We need more roommates. I’m a permanent third wheel these days!” Sam complained over his pancakes.

“Oh, is that how it is?” Steve smirked as he stood by the stove, pouring more batter into the pan. “You gonna cook for them?”

Sam scoffed.

“We could always turn you into a unicycle.” Loki deadpanned as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

“I think I liked you better when you weren’t trying to be the new Tony.” Sam chuckled, shaking his head.

“Samuel, how could you?” Loki feigned indignation. “I was perfecting snark a millennium before he was born.”

“Maybe, but he sure acts like he’s your dad sometimes. If not for Morgan, I’d wonder whether his favourite kid was you or Peter.”

Loki blushed a little at that, and hummed. “Funny you should say that.”

It was Steve now who gave him a slightly perplexed look.

“We really do need to start planning our weddings, dear.” He said with a cryptic grin, before leaving the kitchen with his coffee in hand.

“Anyone ever tell you you’re marrying a weirdo, Steve-O?”

Steve shook his head with a smile, turning back to the pancakes. “Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“I found a new Peter.” Tony said casually over dinner.

“That was quick.” Bucky replied. He and Jane were in the process of moving, and were still sticking around for meals most days, especially when Jane was working late. Which with her, was most days— Darcy had only just managed to drag her out of the lab, which meant she was also joining in.

“Another Spider-Person?” Darcy asked excitedly.

“Another teenaged superpowered individual.” Tony replied with an air of nonchalance. “Of course, that means she’s on call and living at home, but just in Jersey City, so not too far.”

Sam gave him an incredulous glance. “Where do you find these people?”

Tony shrugged. “Apparently Captain Kirk met her, and gave her a recommendation. Figured she’s better off on a team than trying to go it alone.”

Steve furrowed his brow. “Have we met this Kirk?”

Loki giggled. “Oh come on now, even I know that’s a Star Trek reference. He means Captain Danvers.”

Tony mimed shedding a tear. “I’m so proud of you, Mr. Spock. Anyway, I invited her and her folks over for lunch on Saturday. It seems they are aware of her… Abilities, and would prefer being kept in the loop.”

“She got a name?” Bucky asked between bites.

“Kamala Khan.”

“More alliteration?” Loki shook her head. “I’m starting to think that’s a requirement. Maybe I should have kept Laufeydottir as my surname.”

“You and your word games.” Bucky muttered.

Tony caught up with Darcy before she left for the day.

“Hey kiddo. This place is about to have a lot of vacancies. You ever consider moving in? Free room and board, no commute, can’t beat the location.”

She raised her eyebrow. “Why do I detect some kind of underlying motivation to this?”

“Whatever do you mean? I’m sure it would help with your student loans or whatever.”

She glared at him in response.

“Okay, fine. Maybe it’s sentiment, end of an era. Band’s breaking up. Not sure who’s the Yoko in this situation. Oh shit, maybe it’s Morgan…” He trailed off, distracted by his own allusions.

“You’re worried Steve and Loki are going to leave too?”

“What? No. Maybe? I planned on giving them the penthouse as a wedding present. Steve’s about to officially be head of the Avengers Initiative, it’ll be easier for them if they stay. I’m more worried about Goose.”

“You mean Sam? Why?”

“Well, unless we get more recruits to move in…”

“Ah, right. Awkward.” She paused. “I’ll think about it. Might be nice to have roommates again.”

“Thanks, kid.”

“We’re going to be late!” Kamala yelled as her parents kept fussing over what to bring as a gift for the Avengers. They had already prepared some halwa to bring for a dessert, and were trying to decide whether individual gifts would be too much. “They said we didn’t need to bring anything, it’s just a meeting to introduce everyone and set up details.”

“Yes, Kamala, but we have to make a good impression! We’re meeting some of the most famous people in the world!” Her mother’s tone left little room for argument.

“And you’re going to be working with them, this is such a proud moment for our family.” Her father added.

“I think being on time would be the best impression.” She muttered, tapping her foot impatiently.

“I suppose we could save other gifts for another time?” Her father suggested, grabbing the tray of halwa and heading for the door.

“Awesome.” Kamala replied, following him to the car.

“Kamala! You made it. Tony Stark,” he held out his hand, “nice to meet you.”

She shook his hand a little awkwardly. “Uh, you too.”

“These must be your folks. Thank you for allowing your daughter to work with this group of overpowered oddballs.”

Her mother blushed, and her father shook Tony’s hand. “We’re glad she can be of help. It is truly an honour, Mr. Stark.”

“Oh, don’t thank me. I’m stepping down as head of the Initiative. It’s Capsicle leading the team now.”

Her mother’s eyes widened. “Do you mean Captain America? Oh, I remember reading about him in school. I could not believe it when he returned. Sergeant Barnes, too. He was the most handsome of the Howling Commandos. I think I had a crush on him when I was studying American history for my citizenship test.”

“Ammi!”

“Don’t tell him that, he doesn’t need the ego boost. Shall we?” Tony gestured toward the elevator.

“We’ve had a few lineup changes recently, and Cap’s working on recruitment. Everyone who is still on the active roster is here today, so you can get to know your future coworkers. We’ll have lunch and then chat.”

Kamala’s father held up the trays of halwa. “We brought sweets for everyone.”

“That is incredibly thoughtful, thank you. You can set it in the kitchen for now.” He motioned toward the island counter.

There were four others waiting in the common area, what was left of the Avengers.

“Alright, let me introduce everyone.” At a look from Steve, he sighed. “Kamala, Mr. and Mrs. Khan, this is Captain Steve Rogers, aka Captain America. As I mentioned, he’ll be taking over the initiative.”

He shook their hands. “Sir. Ma’am. Pleasure to meet you. I hope you can trust we have Kamala’s best interests at heart, and will do our utmost to keep her safe. Kamala, I look forward to working with you.”

They smiled and thanked him, her father introducing them both. “I’m Yusuf, and this is my wife Muneeba. It is truly an honour to meet you, sir.” That earned them a boyish grin from Steve in return.

“Next up, Sergeant James Barnes, aka Bucky, aka The Winter Soldier, although he doesn’t call himself that anymore.”

Bucky shook his head, before grinning at them. “Pleasure.”

Kamala’s mother just about swooned, earning a chuckle from Bucky.

“Sam Wilson, codename Falcon.”

He flashed his toothy grin before shaking hands. “Lovely to meet all of you.”

“And finally, Loki of Asgard. She doesn’t need an alias because she’s basically a myth already.

She snorted, and extended her hand.

“Oh, I’m so glad Kamala will have a woman on the team.” Yusuf beamed.

“Mostly.” Loki muttered under her breath, before earning a glare of her own from Steve.

“So what is your power? I don’t really remember hearing much about you.” Muneeba asked, not unkindly.

A look of panic crossed Loki’s face, and Tony suddenly remembered that they had introduced her after the switch; she wouldn’t remember facing the press or public at all. Or congress, for that matter. Not to mention that she had been presenting as male at the time…

“Oh, I’m a sorceress.” She said hesitantly, biting her lip, deciding what else she might say. “And a shapeshifter.”

Kamala’s jaw dropped. “That is so cool.”

“Oh, uh, thank you?”

“Lokes here being an alien and all, she really isn’t as public facing as the rest of us mere mortals.” Tony chimed in, trying to break up the tension he felt. “Anyway, shall we? The table’s already set.”

The rectangular table had eight places set, Tony taking one end, with Steve at the other. Kamala and her parents sat on one side, across from the other Avengers.

“I made sure everything’s halal, so dig in.”

Lunch passed with light conversation, before they broke to the common room for coffee, tea, and dessert.

“Oh, this is delicious.” Loki praised the halwa.

“That’s high praise coming from her, lush that she is.” Bucky laughed, earning him a sideways glance in return.

“Oh, we’re so glad you like it.” Muneeba smiled.

“So,” Steve turned to Kamala, “we’ll have to make a schedule of sorts - what days you can come in for training, and when you’re available on call. We don’t plan on disrupting your school schedule at all. Oh, and do you have an alias you’d like us to use for you?”

“Ms. Marvel.” She said with a shy smile.

Steve grinned. “Welcome to the team, Ms. Marvel. We’re glad to have you.”

Chapter Text

The next recruit came courtesy of SHIELD, recommended by Clint as someone he’d worked with before, and who he thought would be a good addition to their team.

Since Bobbi Morse, aka Mockingbird, was not a teenager, she elected to move into the tower after agreeing to join the team. While she didn’t get quite the same formal welcome as Kamala (namely because she was a known element and Tony was working on his lake house), they did have a dinner with all of the now-current Avengers when she moved in. Kamala stayed after her Saturday training, and Bucky came in on his day off, giving the team of six a chance to get to know each other before embarking on their first mission.

Steve was still getting used to the idea of actually being in charge (and not just acting like he was), so he was a little stiff when trying to make the introductions before everyone sat down at the table. Most days no one ate at the table for dinners, so it was already a little awkward for them. So much had changed in the last year that Steve knew it would take time for the team dynamic to settle again; especially since they were still trying to get a few more full-time, onsite recruits for the Initiative. Four was a good start, but six would be an ideal base.

“Everyone, our newest Avengers Initiative member, Barbara Morse.” He gestured to her as they gathered around the table.

“Call me Bobbi.” She waved at the group, who introduced themselves in turn.

“Sam.”

“Bucky”

“Kamala.”

“Loki.”

Steve grinned. “Let’s dig in.”

Steve tried to make it a point to at least have breakfast with everyone on site most days, so as much as Loki enjoyed sleeping in, she begrudgingly awoke to accompany her fiancé in preparing their meal— after he had returned from his morning run, of course.

Bobbi turned out to be very outgoing and friendly; probably exactly what Sam was hoping for in another housemate. Indeed, she fit in easily.

Darcy announced her intention to move in the next month, which meant another resident of the tower, even if she wouldn’t be another Avenger.

Bobbi and Darcy got on like a house on fire, and soon enough tried to pull Loki into their makeshift ‘girls nights’ they’d have every so often. 

Reluctantly, she agreed, and found herself joining them for drinks and gossip.

A few drinks in one night, with Loki still depressingly sober, Darcy nudged her. “So, what’s the good captain like in bed?” She wiggled her eyebrows.

Loki’s cheeks tinged with pink. “Very warm. And soft. He’s well-muscled, yet somehow a great pillow.”

Bobbi gave her a disbelieving look. “Wait, are you taking that literally?”

“How else am I supposed to take it?”

Darcy rolled her eyes. “The sex! Is the golden boy dirty behind closed doors?”

Loki turned even redder. “I… We…”

Bobbi’s jaw dropped. “Wait, seriously? You two are engaged, and you’ve never slept together? He really is from the 1940s, huh.”

Loki mumbled. “We sleep together every night…”

“Again, talking about sex.”

“Oh.” Loki was bright red now. 

“What’s holding you back? Is it a marriage thing?”

“Well, just… I’ve never… And I’m afraid to… Since he and… It’s complicated.”

Darcy nodded knowingly, while Bobbi frowned at her. 

“You’re saying that you, the 1000 year old goddess of mischief, are the virgin in this relationship?”

Loki nodded. “I think he’s worried about pressuring me, so he’s never brought it up.”

“I admit, I don’t know you or your situation very well. But if it feels like pressure, should you really— Like does he have an ex out there somewhere you’re worried about?”

“It’s complicated.” Loki hissed, signalling the end of that conversation.

It wasn’t so much that Bobbi wanted to meddle in Loki’s love life, it was just that she worried. If this was going to be a cohesive team, anxiety and sexual tension clearly weren’t going to help. She decided to talk to Sam, hoping maybe he’d have some insight into the situation, seeing as he’d been around them longer. The way Loki reacted to her and Darcy’s questions, well… The girl clearly lacked female friends, but Bobbi had to wonder what had her so riled up about it.

She ran into Sam in the kitchen the next day. “Does Steve have an ex out there that Loki’s worried about?”

“What? No. Where’d you get that idea?”

She lowered her voice. “She said she’s never slept with him. But that he’s not the virgin between the two of them, so…”

Sam shook his head. “This is way too complicated to explain. And even then, that part certainly isn’t my place. As far as I know, the only person he’s ever been with is Loki.”

Bobbi furrowed her brows. “If I’m going to be part of this team, I think I’m going to need to know what’s so damned complicated between my colleagues that none of you will give me a straight answer. And I don’t really mean about their love lives, because I get that’s not my business. But if it’s going to compromise us?”

Sam sighed. “Look, I think there will be an explanation coming, I’m just not the one to give it. They probably want to wait until we have a few more recruits so they don’t have to go over it too many times- it was pretty traumatic.”

Bobbi hummed, before nodding and walking away, leaving Sam just shaking his head.

“It’s the Avengers Initiative! Do you really think I’m going to say no to that?” Doreen Green was still trying to convince herself (and Tippy-Toe) that this was absolutely the right move. As if to emphasize it, she held up the invitation she had been given. “Look how official this is! Steve Rogers signed it! Captain America!”

“That does seem pretty special.” Tippy-Toe replied.

“Plus, we could live in Stark Tower! Which is being renamed Avengers Tower! How cool is that?”

“Pretty sweet not paying rent. And we’d be close to Central Park.”

Doreen hummed. “So what I’m hearing here is— we should definitely say yes. Join the Avengers. Earth’s Mightiest Heroes! Even if the team will be mostly new faces. We could be two of them!”

“You can have all of the publicity.” Tippy-Toe was happy just to be there, really. “Who is left from the original Initiative anyway?”

“Well… How original? I don’t think any of these folks were there when Tony Stark first started it. But they’re still going to have Captain America, Falcon, Winter Soldier, and… Loki?” Doreen looked down to her squirrel pal, a little confused. “I don’t remember Loki.”

“Wasn’t he that alien guy? The one who was dating Captain America?”

“Huh. That was a few years ago. I don’t remember hearing much about him after that. Still, alien! That’s pretty cool.” Doreen was grinning again. “Let’s do this, Tip!”

Bucky and Sam were sparring in the training room, not long after learning that the team’s newest addition, and the tower’s newest resident, was to be a hero known as Squirrel Girl. After Sam hit the mat for the second time, he got up for some water, and asked Bucky the question that had been burning in his mind.

“You’re his best friend, you know how his mind works. Is he doing this on purpose?”

“What the hell are you talkin’ about, Sam?” Bucky was genuinely confused.

“Steve’s in charge, right? He gets the final say on who we invite to the initiative.”

“And?”

“Why are they all women?”

Bucky snorted. “Only you would notice that.”

“Bullshit, man! You mean to tell me that never occurred to you? That somehow being married means you no longer distinguish gender?”

“What, are you scared of being outnumbered? Loki can be a guy if it makes you feel better.” Bucky shook his head at Sam’s increasingly peevish expression. “What difference does it make, anyway? We’re looking for talent. The best candidates.”

“Easy for you to say, not living here.”

“Ohhh, I get it now. A single man, surrounded by women? Since Stevie and Loki are together, you’re afraid you have a whole harem?” Bucky teased.

“Will you shut up, man?” Sam sighed. “Just because you were into the whole ‘workplace dating’ thing…”

“Yikes, touched a nerve, did I?”

“It’s not that. It’s more like I don’t feel any more part of the group living here with five than I did with three. Don’t know that’s going to change with six.”

“Well, you could start by approaching them as fellow humans, instead of acting like dames are a different species.” Bucky offered.

“Really? You’re going to come at me with that 40’s ‘dame’ bullshit while advocating for gender equality?” Sam frowned. “I know that, but I’ve just always had a hard time with it. Maybe it’s from Sarah always motherin’ me, but I just never had many female friends.”

“I’m sorry for being so flippant. Just give it time.” Bucky spoke with sincerity. “Another round?” He gestured to the mat.

Sam narrowed his eyes at him. “Who are you, and what the hell have you done with Bucky Barnes?”

“Tip, just look at this place! Now if this doesn’t scream ‘opulence’ and ‘gourmet nuts’ then I don’t know what does.” Doreen put her hands on her hips as she surveyed the newly-christened Avengers Tower.

“This is just the lobby.” Tippy-Toe pointed out, from her perch on Doreen’s right shoulder.

“I know! And isn’t it great?” She made her way to the elevators labeled ‘AI Personnel Only’, where a guard sat next to a turnstile. She pulled out the card that would grant her access, scanning it and going through, when the guard made a motion to stop her.

“Excuse me, no unregistered pets.”

“Tippy-Toe isn’t a pet! She’s my partner!”

“Service animals only.”

“Well, how do I register her then? I’m supposed to be meeting with the Captain!”

“Sorry, I don’t make the rules. There’s some paperwork, needs to be done in advance.”

“But I’m moving in!”

The guard shrugged.

“Tippy-Toe is part of this meeting. Who do I have to talk to? I need to resolve it now!”

The guard clearly wasn’t expecting to be challenged over this. “Well, I can call my boss.”

Before Doreen could reply, a woman with dark hair and green eyes seemed to appear from nowhere, and walked up to the guard. “Is there some kind of problem?”

“Oh! Uh, this, well, she wants to take the squirrel upstairs.”

The woman turned to Doreen, then gestured to Tip. “Who’s your friend?”

“I’m Tippy-Toe! Squirrel Girl’s companion!”

Doreen was ready to translate for her, but didn’t have a chance before the mysterious stranger replied.

“Lovely to meet you, Tippy-Toe. If you two are partners, then of course you’re both welcome.” She gave the guard a pointed look, and he turned back to focus on his work.

“Wait, you understand her?”

The woman hummed. “Allspeak. I am Loki. You must be Doreen.”

Doreen could only nod, before exchanging a glance with Tippy-Toe. This was Loki?

“Shall we?” Loki gestured to the elevator. “Mustn’t keep Steven waiting, he is awfully particular about punctuality.”

Doreen nodded, and followed her on board.

“So, uh, Loki. You seem to be the most mysterious of the Avengers. How long have you been a member?”

Loki let out a sharp breath. “Mysterious? I suppose that has become increasingly true. I’m a mystery even to myself sometimes.” She paused, appearing lost in thought. “As far as how long I’ve been here, well, I suppose of our remaining comrades I would be considered to have the most seniority; however I lack Steven’s leadership skills.”

“Wait, really? You’ve been here that long?”

Loki smiled cryptically. “More or less.”

Tippy-Toe, being a squirrel, didn’t have the same perception of “socially awkward” as a human, but then neither did Loki. “I thought you were a man. And dating Captain America?”

Loki laughed under her breath. “Technically he’s my fiancé now.”

“Congratulations.” Doreen squeaked out.

“Thank you.” Loki smiled. “And to the rest of your statement, dear Tippy-Toe— I am a shapeshifter.”

“Can you shapeshift into a squirrel?”

Loki grinned, and a moment later a black squirrel, still with Loki’s green eyes, took her place in the elevator. She ran up to perch on Doreen’s other shoulder. “No matter the outward form, I’m still me. I’m always me.”

Tippy-Toe was dumbstruck, but Doreen was more vocal about her excitement. “Oh, we are going to have so much fun on missions together!”

“I don’t doubt it.” Loki replied, just as the elevator doors opened to reveal Steve. She jumped the distance to land on his shoulder.

“What is going on here? I thought Loki went down to get you, Ms. Green.”

Loki chittered, stretching up on her hind legs to kiss his cheek.

“Ah, that tickles!”

Doreen tried to stifle a laugh, before Loki suddenly resumed her former shape, relying solely on the super-soldier’s reflexes to catch her in his arms, holding her bridal-style. She grinned up at him, giving him another kiss on the cheek, at which point he flushed in embarrassment. “Uh, you can go ahead to the conference room Ms. Green. I’ll meet you there shortly.” As he walked off, still holding Loki, she gave Doreen and Tippy-Toe a wink and pointed in the direction they needed to go.

“I really like her.” Tippy-Toe sighed.

Chapter Text

The next part-time team member’s arrival could not have been more blasé. Nat walked into the common room where Sam was playing a video game on the couch, with Loki at the kitchen island eating a bowl of cereal. They both looked up as the elevator opened, to see the spy accompanied by a blonde woman neither of them recognized.

“This is Agent 13. She’ll be your new me.” With that, the redhead turned heel and departed as unceremoniously as she came, leaving said Agent glancing around awkwardly as Sam and Loki sat dumbfounded.

“Uh, hi. I’m Sharon Carter. And you’re… Sam Wilson and Loki Friggadottir.”

“She really is the new Nat.” Sam muttered.

Loki appraised the new arrival. “Are you moving in? We didn’t get any warning about your joining us.”

“Oh! No. I’ll be another one of your on-call members. I still work for SHIELD. I guess we just thought it would be helpful to have a liaison again.”

“We being Fury?” Sam said with a hint of amusement.

Sharon gave a half smile that told them all they needed to know. “I won’t be staying long today. Is anyone else home? I suppose I should meet whoever I can.”

Sam called out. “JARVIS, call whoever’s available to the common room.”

“Right away, sir.”

Bobbi had apparently been hovering nearby, because moments later she was hugging Sharon. “Long time no see! I’ve was wondering who they’d rope in.”

Sharon laughed. “Would’ve been you if you hadn’t already jumped ship.”

Bobbi shrugged. “I know a good thing when I see it. Clint came to convince me, but honestly it didn’t take much convincing. I like it here. Pay’s good, free rent… Company’s not bad either.” She looked over Sharon’s shoulder and winked at a very confused Sam, unsure what to make of this. He was saved from trying to respond by Steve and Doreen both making their way into the common room.

“I think that’s everyone who’s in today.” Steve said, taking a stool next to Loki on the kitchen island. “What’s going on?” He looked over at Sharon and Bobbi.

Bobbi stood back and gestured to Sharon. “Our new SHIELD liaison, Sharon Carter.”

Sharon nodded at the new arrivals. “Captain Rogers, Ms. Green. Pleased to meet you.”

“You too!” Doreen squealed. “This is Tippy-Toe!” She pointed to the squirrel on her shoulder.

“Carter?” Steve said slowly. “Any relation—”

“She’s my aunt. And she told me a lot of stories about you.”

“All good, I hope?” Steve asked shyly, causing Loki to burst into laughter next to him. He made a face at her, while Sam cocked an eyebrow, and Bobbi and Doreen exchanged shrugs. Sharon, for her part, was unfazed.

“More or less. If anything, I’m only disappointed you’re not as handsome as she described you.”

Loki almost fell off her chair at this point, completely unable to calm her giggles. Steve’s face was beet red, and everyone else seemed to be looking elsewhere.

“I won’t keep you all today, just wanted to introduce myself. I’ll see you around.”

Bobbi managed a composed face and walked her out.

“Well, she seems fun.” Loki finally said as her laughter abated.

“You are so paying for that later, sweetheart.” Steve glared at her, trying and failing to maintain a stern expression of his own.

“Why is everyone here so weird?” Sam asked to no one in particular.

“So, Ms. Maximoff, why do you want to join the Avengers? I see your brother has accepted Professor Xavier’s offer to join his X-Men, is that not something you’re interested in?” Steve tried to maintain a kind demeanour as he addressed the obviously nervous young woman.

Wanda fidgeted in her seat before answering. “My brother and I are very close. It will be difficult being apart. However… Our personalities are very different. He fits in well with the mutants. I do not.”

“I see. And you think your personality will fit better here?”

Wanda was quiet for a moment, gathering her thoughts. “Yes, Captain. There is a different kind of pressure, one I am more accustomed to. And from what I have seen, the environment is not nearly so… Overwhelming for my abilities.”

“I see. Do you mind elaborating on those abilities?”

She twirled a finger in her long brown hair nervously. “I can see into peoples’ minds. Feel their emotions. Give them visions.” Seeing Steve’s expression, she quickly continued. “I would never do that without permission! I’m still testing the extent of my magic, but it seems I can manipulate objects as well— create forcefields and illusions.”

Steve nodded thoughtfully. “I see. Maybe Loki can help you with that. Refining your magic, that is. It does seem like you would be a good fit for us.”

“Oh, that would be great, Captain.”

“Call me Steve.” He grinned. “The offer includes room and board in the Tower, if you’re interested. We’ve got quite the assortment of residents; they may take some getting used to, but most of them will also be your teammates.”

“Yes, I would like that very much.”

“Well then.” Steve extended his hand. “Welcome to the team, Ms. Maximoff.”

She shook his hand, beaming. “Please, call me Wanda.”

“I think your fiancé is trying to torture me.” Loki was standing over the coffee maker as Sam entered the kitchen complaining.

“Oh?” She quirked an eyebrow.

“Seriously? We’ve been replenishing the ranks of the Avengers the last few months, and yet another is moving in today. And what do they all have in common?”

Loki thought for a moment. “They are all very talented individuals?”

“They’re all women! I’m drowning in estrogen!”

Loki frowned. “Would you feel better if I presented as male more often?”

“Maybe.” Sam grumbled.

“You were the one complaining about a lack of roommates, Samuel.”

“Yeah, yeah. Beggars can’t be choosers.”

“It’s okay to feel inadequate.”

“Now hold on, I did not say—”

Loki gave him an enigmatic smirk.

“You’re both trying to kill me.”

A week after Wanda moved in, Steve called the first formal meeting of all of the current Avengers, full and part time. Instead of the traditional dinner, he opted to call everyone a bit earlier than usual and use the conference room. With their roster seemingly set for the foreseeable future, they were all going to have to be told some things about the team and each other: starting with Loki.

He didn’t even know where to begin with her. So little about her was known by the public in the first place, even after their problematic run in with the government. Worse, that wasn’t the Loki who was here now, and that in itself was an unbelievable tale. Still, if the team was to have trust in each other, they needed to be sure they could. Hiding something so vital wasn’t an option.

Once everyone had taken a seat, Steve took a deep breath and put on his ‘Captain Face’ as Loki so lovingly called it. “Thanks for coming, everyone. It’s taken some time, but we’re now at a point I’m happy to say that all of you make up the current iteration of the Avengers.” He grinned at that. “The name is for the public; they want a group of heroes to look up to. Each and every one of you is up to that task, and we’ll soon be releasing our current roster to the public. They won’t have any details that you don’t want them to have; everyone’s code names and a rundown of your abilities is more than enough.”

Doreen’s hand shot up.

“Uh, yes, question?”

“Can Tippy-Toe get her own entry on the roster? She’s my partner, not a part of my powers.”

Steve smiled indulgently. “I don’t see why not.”

Doreen held up a hand to Tippy-Toe, who appeared to give her a high five.

“Alright. So as most of you know, the Avengers Initiative was founded by Tony Stark almost a decade ago, as a means to find and recruit other powered individuals to work together should the need arise. While our founding members have retired, the four of us—” He gestured to Loki, Bucky, and Sam, “all worked with them as part of that team. It seems only fair then that we tell you a bit more about ourselves, and how we ended up here. Some details that aren’t available to the public. And since Loki has been here the longest, I’ll let her start.”

Loki cleared her throat. “Right. My story will also be the longest, I’m afraid. But I’ll start with how I got here. You see, I was banished to this realm…”

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Now under the leadership of Captain Steve Rogers, the Avengers Initiative is pleased to announce its new roster:

Captain America — The first Super Solider and American Hero, Master strategist and current leader of the Avengers Initiative.

Falcon — Former pararescue. Uses flight suit along with drone Redwing to aid in aerial reconnaissance.

The Winter Soldier — Original member of the Howling Commandos alongside Captain America. Super Soldier.

Loki — Sorcerer and shapeshifter.

Mockingbird — Former SHIELD agent and trained martial artist.

Agent 13 — SHIELD agent and liaison.

Ms. Marvel — Can manipulate light, as well as change size.

Squirrel Girl —All the powers of a girl AND a squirrel!

Tippy-Toe — All the powers of a squirrel!

Scarlet Witch — Magic powers including object manipulation and force fields.

The Initiative continues to be funded and overseen by Tony Stark. Inquiries regarding the Initiative and its members can be directed to Pepper Potts, CEO, Stark Industries.

Chapter Text

“So, can you talk to birds? Deadpool told me you can talk to birds.” Doreen had perched herself on the armrest of one of the couches, addressing Sam, who was lounged out on the other.

“What? No. Who’s Deadpool?”

“What about Redwing? You talk to him, right?”

Sam chuckled. “Redwing’s a drone, Dor.”

“Right… And Bucky hates him.”

“Hah, I guess he does.”

“It would be cooler if you could talk to birds.” Doreen said with a scowl.

All Sam could do was shake his head in amusement. He had to imagine this was what it was like having younger sisters— between Doreen and Kamala he’d sure gotten his share of questions that seemed rather apropos of nothing. Still, he could hardly complain about being bored these days. The newly named Avengers Tower was once again full of life, even if he had little in common with most of it.

“Wanna play some video games?” Doreen asked.

“Don’t you have classes today?” Sam wondered aloud. Doreen moved into the Tower for the free rent more than anything, seeing as she was still in college.

“Nope! Normally I’d just have the one lecture today but it was cancelled. I am completely free to smash you.”

“Uhhh…”

“Super Smash Brothers, Wilson, get your mind out of the gutter.” He heard Darcy’s playful shout from the kitchen; she must have come up from the lab for snacks.

Sam huffed. “I swear, all of you are just setting me up. One big trap labelled ‘harassment.’ I’m not falling for it! I see through your plot, trying to get rid of all the men.”

“What, you don’t enjoy being the Avengers most eligible bachelor?” She joked back.

“By default? Nah, I’m good. I didn’t sign up for a dating service, I’m here to save the world. That is still what we do here, right?”

Darcy snorted. “Whatever helps you sleep at night, Sammy.”

He rolled his eyes. “Go cause trouble somewhere else, Darce.”

Doreen was practically vibrating on the couch, Tippy-Toe perched on her shoulder. “So, are we gonna smash or what?”

“Loki, we still need to talk about a date.” Steve looked up over his breakfast.

Loki hummed, taking another bite of cereal. “I guess we haven’t gone out for a while. What were you thinking? Dinner? Picnic?”

Steve stared for a moment before a grin slowly overtook his face. “Loki… I mean for our wedding.”

“Oh. Which one?”

The grin was replaced by confusion. “Which one? What are you talking about?”

“Steven, I thought—” Loki furrowed her brows. “You do realize I am still royalty on Asgard? We will have to be married there. I assume you would also want a wedding here so our friends can attend.”

Steve spluttered. “What?”

Loki frowned. “I thought that you went to Asgard— surely you knew? I still have obligations there. If we have children, they would be in line for the throne.”

Steve grew quiet, and his thoughts were so far inside his head that even with his serum-enhanced hearing he didn’t notice Bobbi approaching.

“You two need to work on your communication. Have you thought about couples therapy?”

Loki only stared in response, while Steve seemed to snap out of his stupor.

“It never really occurred to me. I had to eat that apple to be allowed on Asgard— You’re saying we’re expected to have a wedding ceremony there?”

Loki sighed. “At some point, yes. Like it or not, I am still a princess. However, I’m sure we could put it off for another century or so— Unless of course I should fall pregnant.”

Steve had no idea how to react to that.

Bobbi let out an incredulous giggle. “Fall pregnant, like ‘Oops, didn’t mean to have unprotected sex with my husband, he just kinda slipped inside there’ or something?”

Steve turned bright red and Loki looked between her fiancé and her colleague. “I understand that the concept of time here is different than I perhaps am used to. An engagement can last a long time, far longer than I’m sure is standard here. It simply did not occur to me to plan anything before consulting with my mother, as she would be arranging any ceremony on Asgard.”

Bobbi shook her head. “In all the time I’ve been here, I would have thought you two were married already. You might as well just go to the courthouse to make it official or something, and save the pomp for the royal wedding.”

“That’s not a terrible idea. The only point in having two weddings is for legal reasons here— at least that’s what Tony said.” Loki replied. She studied Steve’s face. “Assuming you still want to marry me knowing the kind of responsibilities it entails.”

Steve wore the exasperated yet earnest expression that followed many such comments by his fiancée. “Loki, how can you even say that? I didn’t ask you conditionally. I might not have expected the extra obligations we’d have, but that doesn’t change how I feel about you. Nothing ever could. I love you.”

Loki’s voice faltered. “I love you, too.”

Bobbi rolled her eyes and opened the fridge, searching for something to eat, or perhaps a distraction from the sappiness happening next to her. “God, this place is a nightmare. I wish I was into girls.” She muttered to herself.

The debriefing room was quiet as the team trudged in. Doreen was down in medical after getting a little too close to an enemy explosion, which left Bucky, Sam, Bobbi, and Kamala to settle around the table as Steve moved to the front with a sigh.

Loki had taken Wanda to Kamar-Taj as a sort of magical retreat at Wong’s invitation, and Sharon had been off on a SHIELD mission. They shouldn’t have been needed. All the intel pointed to a simple in and out extraction; even calling in Kamala had been a precautionary measure that had turned necessary when the “sparsely manned” AIM stronghold turned out to be anything but.

Steve looked around at the faces of his team. Everyone was exhausted; they had managed to get the intel they were after, but any hope of stealth was long gone— AIM knew they had it and would soon enough change course.

“Look. I’m not going to pretend this went well. Take your time with your reports. We need to figure out where the leaks are; why our information was so wrong. I want everyone to take some time off. Decompress. We need everyone at their best before we make our next move.”

Everyone exchanged glances, weariness on their faces, but no one spoke. Bucky was appraising Steve, knowing his friend far too well for Steve to hide from him.

“That includes you, Stevie. I don’t care if you’re in charge, we’re taking you away for a few days.” He elbowed Sam.

“Yeah! Boys trip. We’ll all go down to Louisiana for some fishing.”

“Have to lead by example, right?” Bucky’s grin was smug enough to lighten the mood somewhat.

Steve rolled his eyes at that. “Someone has to be here in case something comes up…”

“Oh, I’m on it.” Bobbi volunteered with a smirk. “If things get out of hand, I can call in my SHIELD friends for backup. You deserve a break, Cap.”

He sighed again, knowing how right they were. He hadn’t had any real time off since taking over the Initiative, and between the work and trying to figure things out with Loki, well…

“Fine. We can take a weekend. Loki and Wanda are gone for another week, but if you need the help, Bobbi…”

“Yeah yeah, I’ll ring up Strange. Don’t worry so much! I think the time away will let you come back with fresh eyes.”

Kamala had been quiet, since for her, “time off” from Avenging still meant school. She finally spoke up, looking at Sam. “Take pictures! I won’t believe those two are relaxing without evidence.”

Steve and Bucky both let out groans at that, while Sam just chuckled. “Don’t worry, Kam, I’ll document everything.”

Loki stared at the book, deep in thought. She had been spending considerable time in Kamar-Taj’s library while on this trip with Wanda, the younger magic user receiving more hands-on training from the sorcerers of the temple.

There were certainly many useful tomes here; comparable even to Asgard’s vast library. Only Vanaheim could outclass it, certainly.

It only made Loki more keenly aware of her own shortcomings. She could certainly see how another version of herself might fall into the trap of assuming they had the knowledge necessary to successfully wield such power as their seiðr granted access to— but her strength was raw, untamed. There was no one on Asgard or any other realm who had surpassed her abilities, and therefore no one to teach her restraint and discipline with them. No, if Loki were to dispel her status as a goddess of wildfire, that would have to come from within.

But was she capable of that, truly?

As much as this excursion was for Wanda, to help the young woman learn the extent of her magical abilities, Loki had to admit it was also for herself. She had not taken the time to truly reconnect with her seiðr since it had returned, and perhaps now, with everything that had happened, she needed time away from New York to consider who she truly was.

Time away from Steven. Because who was Loki, outside of him?

Who was this Loki at all?