Chapter Text
the winter soldier had given himself up to the avengers.
why the fuck he had done that, he didn’t know.
for some fucking reason, on the helicarrier, when s- captain america, his target had been down, and all it would take would be one blow and he would be dead, he had stopped himself. something was just pulling inside him, and he couldn’t get himself to do it.
and for some reason he knew the guys name.
steve. he knew his handlers hadn't given him that information, it wasn’t important to the mission, so how the fuck did he know it?
he could feel that he knew the guy. something deep inside of him knew this man, and that scared him.
the helicallier had quickly been dealt its final blow after that moment, and they were both falling straight into the water below.
the soldier, for no explainable reason, grabbed onto captain america and refused to let go. he could’ve just let him drown, save himself, and get back to his handlers. but that same something inside him wouldn’t let him.
he dragged the man out of the water and on to a beach, another opportunity to leave him, and even though the soldier knew he would be fine if he did, he just… couldn’t leave. he felt an incessant need to protect him, a strange feeling that he was weak, and he would succumb to the cold soon, and he need to get him inside and light the fire and wrap him in blankets and-
where the fuck had that come from.
and why did steve seem to look so much bigger to him now?
he sighed, and stared at the unconscious man sprawled on the beach, and he realised he needed to get him safe, get him home.
he didn’t know where that was, so the avengers tower was the only other option.
that meant giving himself in. there was no way he would be able to leave him without getting noticed.
and… the idea of returning to hydra now seemed to make him sick. that felt wrong, he knew that was wrong, but this just seemed safer.
so that was what he did, found his way to the avengers tower, the captain in his arms bridal style the whole way there.
when he had finally gotten there, carefully putting him down on the concrete, not even a second after the captain had touched the ground he was surrounded by military vehicles and cop cars and about a hundred men with guns, and he had put his hands up and let them take him.
and now he was in a tight concrete interrogation room in the tower, stupid one way mirror and all, which the soldier honestly thought was a bit weird. what would they need this in the tower for? either way, it was there, and he was cuffed to the table, his ankles cuffed to the metal chair he was sat on.
he honestly thought it diddnt seem like enough. if this was hydra he would be fucking strapped to the chair, his metal arm probrably held down to the table by a huge metal cuff that covered the length of the bottom half of it, but no. just handcuffs. extra strong ones, connected by a metal bar rather than a chain, but still just handcuffs.
either they were really stupid, or they actually diddnt see him as that much of a threat. he wasn’t sure wether to be glad or incredibly angry at that.
lost in thought, he hadn’t noticed the hiss of the door opening, someone walking in and sitting opposite to him.
“hello, winter soldier, my name is tony. do you know who i am?”
he looked up, scrunching his nose at the man. he had a weird beard. and why the fuck would he know who he was.
“no.”
the man looked confused, like, annoyingly confused. really, why on earth would the soldier know who this man was?
“seriously? tony stark, stark industries? one of the richest men alive?” tony paused, staring with a confused look on his face. the soldier stared back. “…nothing?”
he shook his head. “no.” he paused, before adding “is this going to be the whole interrogation, because I promise I have no fucking clue who you are, and that also seems like a pretty pointless thing to interrogate someone on”
tony scoffed, looking down to a file he had in his hands.
if the soldier was being honest, the name stark did ring a bell. he remembered a mission from- a few months ago? a year? he had caused a car crash. killed two people. the starks. the thought put a sour taste in his mouth.
“no, i do have actual questions for you-“ he shuffled through the papers, until he found one that he brought to the front, clearing his throat like he was about to speak, before he looked up at the soldier and paused, a weird look on his face.
“that mask looks uncomfortable. do you want to take it off before we start?”
no. he couldn’t. tony was right, it was digging into his skin and is had gotten all wet from being dropped in the river and his skin felt all horrible and itchy underneath it, he would honestly do anything to have it off right now, but he couldn’t.
that was a strict rule. it had almost fallen off during the fight on the bridge and one of his handlers had noticed it, and once he had gotten back to the base they had told someone, and he had ended up getting shouted at, and hit, and hit and hit and hit until he couldn’t think straight, and he knew he would never let it fall off on a mission again.
he didn’t even understand why. he just knew he couldn’t.
“no.” he replied, stern, and tony had given him a look, but left it alone and gone back to looking at his paper.
“okay.” the man paused, taking a deep breath in “so, how long have you been working for hydra?”
right to the point. ok.
“I… don’t know. a few years. I think. I get- I go in cryo. get frozen. and they wipe my memory a lot. i think it’s been a few years. ten at most”
he didn’t know why he was telling this man so much. it just… felt right. another emotion that didn’t seem to make any logical sense. he seemed to have a lot of those now.
tony looked down at his paper, then back at him. he seemed to be considering saying something but decided against it.
“what’s your name?”
the soldier laughed, a cold, sad, empty laugh. tony frowned.
“like I said. memory wipe. not a fucking clue. the winter soldier is all I know.”
“…okay.”
the soldier could just make out him whispering a small what the fuck under his breath.
tony paused again, looking at the sheet, before looking back up at the soldier.
“why don’t you want to take the mask off?”
the soldier winced.
“I can’t.”
“What like it’s glued to you or something?”
“no… I just can’t. I have to keep it on.”
“why?”
“I don’t know”
“what if I took it off?”
“please don’t.”
“why?”
“I don’t know! I already told you I don’t know! can you just leave it alone and get back to whatever fucking hydra questions you have. please.”
Tony sighed, starting to stand up “this is all a bit fresh. I think we should leave it here for now. you’ll be moved to a cell and given a meal and we will resume questioning tomorrow”
the soldier watched him as he left.
he hated this.
he wanted to go home.
he had no idea where that was, how to get there, or who else he would find there, but all he wanted right now was to go home. and he wanted… he wanted steve.
he felt tears well up in his eyes. he forced them away.