Archive of Our Own

1

The first time that Kageyama Tobio started liking Hinata Shouyou, he wasn’t even paying attention.

The first time he noticed , though, was on a night like any other. No warnings; not a single thing that could have prepared him for the realization striking up to him.

It was on a darkening evening, the two of them heading home from their late volleyball practice, silence filling up the growing cool air surrounding them as they walked side by side, limbs too sore to even bother the other boy with pinches or little pushes. The sky was becoming darker with every passing minute, the flicker of the tiny stars far above them fluttering in sync with every step they took.

It was just as any other night that they had spent together on their way home, really, and yet, Tobio found himself unable to take his eyes off the boy next to him.

It was a new thing for him to do, because Tobio thought he had gotten used to the way Hinata looked; to the way he smiled tiredly after practice but would still race Kageyama  somewhere; to the way his hair danced in the cool night air, the wind sweeping it in every direction, tickling at his nose and making the short boy scrunch up his face at the funny feeling.

(Tobio himself had a funny feeling in his gut every time he caught sight of the endearing expression).

But noticing was just the first step, and Tobio was not prepared for what would come next. He couldn’t even understand the whole thing yet. He had just started to grasp the idea that Hinata wasn’t that annoying anymore.

Initially, that was terrifying enough. Earth-shattering, if you dare to say. Soul-crushing, even. 

But, then again, that had been just the beginning. And, honestly, he didn’t know how to proceed from there.

Because– okay, woah . He had discovered that he had a crush (one that he had spent weeks trying to deny because it was his first crush in his short life, and he didn’t know that feeling constipated every time he looked at Hinata wasn’t supposed to be a normal thing), and he was already awkward enough as he was like to keep his biggest secret for himself now. He surely didn’t want to embarrass himself more by confessing or doing something equally humiliating. But he had to, because otherwise, the sanity would drench from his body and mind completely.

So, with the courage of a thousand brave men, he confessed.

Or he tried to, at least.

He swore he was about to do it, on one of those nights where the chilly air surrounding them became nothing but colder in the span of fifteen minutes, the time it took them to reach the point where they usually parted ways after school. He was going to do it, his mouth already opening around the words, but it must have been the cold air freezing him from the inside; the air filling up his lungs turning into ice and tucking him in place with the words stuck at the tip of his tongue.

It must have been the sight of Hinata walking beside him the one that melted Tobio’s brain, stopping any functional capacity the boy had learned until that very moment.

He couldn't do it. Not after noticing the way Hinata's hair was dancing on top of his head, covering his flushed cheeks from the cold – and upon noticing this, Tobio realized how warm his own felt. Hinata was definitely a sight, just like that, in the middle of the night, illuminated by the car lights passing by and the dim, yellow glow of the street lamps. Tobio felt his heart skip a beat and his throat close up, followed by the numb feeling on his fingers; he wasn't that cold, but they ached to reach out and tug at the small hands of the ginger boy.

Hands that, Tobio noticed, were busy tugging at the long sleeves of Hinata's thin school jacket.

Without a second thought, Tobio shrugged off his jacket, handing it out without a word, and trying not to focus on the bright hair that bounced with every step. He knew it was a mess by default, but in the chilly air it looked fluffier, somehow, and Kageyama's fingers ached with the need to reach and thread his slim fingers through the soft locks.

It was harder than he thought, and before he knew what was happening, he halted, his lungs filling up with air and his mouth darting open, words on the tip of his tongue, ready to spill Tobio’s deepest secret, as if under the spell of the charming sight Hinata was.

“Hinata" Tobio called out, the boy turning to look at the jacket the taller was handing out, then up to Kageyama's face, a question written all over his face, waiting for the words that were about to be spilled.

But with those hazel eyes locking with his, looking darker than normally but just as open and intense as ever, Tobio realized what he was about to do - though barely in time.

Luckily, he managed to come to his senses and coughed for a solid ten seconds, air suddenly lost, and hoped that the cold of the night was enough excuse to blame the color on his cheeks. He gave a last cough, for good measure, and to confirm that he had regained full control of his actions again. Relief washed over him after feeling with enough control to keep his mouth shut again.

Unfortunately for him, Hinata had seen the entire thing, from the moment Tobio had inhaled a scarily amount of air just to proceed and say nothing more than his name, and was now looking weirdly at him, a confused expression taking all over his face – not knowing if he should pat Kageyama in the back in case he started coughing again, or to ask him what was the deal, even if he wasn't sure he wanted to know, now.

But Tobio couldn't bear having that set of eyes focused on him only, and so, without another thing to do, he pushed the jacket to the unmoving boy before him, who stayed still without averting his eyes from the taller guy.

“What is it?” was instead what he asked, not moving an inch to take the jacket.

Tobio stayed like that, too, not knowing what to do and not knowing how to stop staring at the boy; but the intensity was too much, so begrudgingly, he averted his eyes, shaking the jacket on his hand only to see how it was ignored again.

His eyes set on a scowl and his lips formed a (probably exaggerated) pout, a sign of his disgust; but at the same time, his cheeks got dusted on a faint pink, putting on a show for the orange haired boy, whose stare didn’t falter for a second, making Tobio if only more anxious.

The silence lingered probably for about a whole minute before Tobio, as gracefully as his nature permitted, blurted out:

“Do you want my jacket or do you want me to kick your ass?".

Which was… not romantic at all. But it worked as it obliged Hinata to finally take the jacket, putting it on over his own and letting it cover his smaller frame. The sight almost made Tobio faint.

For a little while, they just stood there, waiting for Hinata to put on the thing properly, and once he was done, they continued with their walk, Hinata oblivious to how flustered Tobio looked for the rest of the walk – he was awkward most of the time, anyways. When they reached the spot where their paths differed, Tobio stood behind in place, watching as Hinata left after eagerly waving him goodbye, his jacket swaying in the wind as the boy pedaled faster, disappearing behind a curve.

That was the first night Tobio experienced having the weight of his heart on his throat. And the one where his way home was accompanied by goosebumps tickling his skin, his nose runny from the cold, and his heart threatening to explode.

And if he had fallen slightly sick for a few days after, it was all worth it. Not even all the mucus in the world could have stopped the smell of Hinata that lingered on this jacket from entering his nostrils.

Not that he had tried to sniff past his runny nose. Nope, not at all. It was just a metaphor – or whatever the meaning to that was, Tobio hadn’t paid attention to that lesson.

The only thing he knew for sure was that Hinata smelled nice on his clothes, but he did better when Tobio could breath him right from under his nose.

Oh, he was so doomed.

2

There had been many opportunities where Tobio could have tried to say something – that something being either just confessing his most embarrassing (but honest) feelings to Hinata, or even daring to do as much as asking him out plainly. But that was big talk for someone like him. Someone who felt like the ground disappeared from under his feet by just having a smile from Hinata aimed at him.

Kageyama Tobio had no problem calling himself a coward, as he had discovered.

It was pathetic. All it took for Tobio to avert his gaze, change the topic and forget how he had even dared to believe he was ready, was a smile from Hinata.

And, as everyone could tell, Hinata was always smiling. A true issue for Tobio, really. His heart had been permanently at his feet for a while now, given how much he felt it drop with every look he directed at the boy.

But he had thought that approaching Hinata while he was in a good mood would help him stay calm and not mess up – as long as he grounded himself with the belief that this couldn’t go wrong. It had taken him a long session of positive-talk (a thing he had heard Miwa doing more than once, looking crazy in front of the mirror) with himself to reach that confidence, and now felt confident enough to at least try.

So, with his mind made up, he marched down every aisle of the school on the free period they had for lunch, brushing past everyone and skipping the vending machines, not even feeling a bit hungry with this mission ahead of him. He wasn’t even looking around, just walking to where he knew he would find the other boy, merely containing himself from stomping once he caught sight of him, as though the force of his steps would help him gain more courage.

In a second, Hinata was a few feet far from him – not only in his imagination with all the positive voices that had made him walk to where he was right now –, bento box untouched on the bench he was sitting on. And Tobio, feeling courageous, walked the remaining steps. But as he came closer, every conviction he had had, faltered.

On his behalf, two out of the three things he had predicted were right. One, Hinata was in a good mood, of course , his smile on full display and his posture relaxed. Good sign! Two, his own mood, though nervous now, still remained positive, his mind chanting something along the lines of  Kageyama Tobio can deal with a crush and anything else!  

The remaing point - or the downside to the whole thing, as Tobio had identified it, was not even a negative thing, per se. Actually, it was one of the most radiant things that Tobio had ever seen in his whole life, no matter how many times he had been exposed to it by now. It was just something that Tobio thought he had learned to handle, but he was always proved wrong. Like in that moment.

Because, okay, he had been right (good for him! ). Hinata was in a good mood. But a good mood for Tobio meant just not feeling bad – not whatever Hinata had going on all the time, with those chirping sounds and loud yelps and explosive jumps. Not to forget the blinding smile he wore for everyone to appreciate, as if he wasn’t aware of how it made people – Tobio – feel (not just warm inside, but with the necessity to assure that he never stopped smiling like that).

Oh, Tobio had been so, so wrong . 

Because Hinata was smiling all bright and warm just for him, like he was happy to see someone like Kageyama – even if he had nothing to offer besides his tosses. But any excuse was not an excuse in Tobio’s head, because any reason that had Hinata smiling up at him like that was enough for him to take, glorious.

The pride of being at the end of Hinata’s smile was almost enough motivation for him to finally ask the boy out. But before he could even spell out the words in his mind, his mouth took the initiative, his stomach prickling funnily as he watched the other boy’s face closely.

“Wanna practice some spikies when you’re done with that?”.

He knew the moment those words came out that he had just missed another chance to confess, but the look he got in return, all fierce and accompanied by the biggest smile he had seen on Hinata that day, was the greatest reward he could have asked for.

“Bet I can finish my lunch in five minutes!” Was Hinata’s response, his smile stretching on for miles and hours throughout the whole day.

Tobio could also feel his own plastered on his face. Not as big, not as warm, but definitely the most sincere he had mustered in a long time.

He could wait. He could, and would wait for as many years as necessary, if he got moments like this with him in return.

3

It was on a Wednesday when Tobio thought he had gathered enough courage to face his emotions regarding Hinata, again.

Mere minutes ago, they had won a practice match against Nekoma – or the city boys , as Tanaka insisted childishly on calling them. It had been a day filled with a range of emotions: from excitement over meeting again with the other team; to happiness from realizing that their hard work was paying off on the court; to impotence when they lost one set by way too many points regardless of their effort; to exhaustion after playing five sets and still doing the physical punishments they had agreed upon from the beginning. 

But despite it all, they had all been in a great mood that day, talking to each other once everyone took their seats inside the van on their way back, bodies relaxing against the cushions as they discussed their plays and analyzed their own mistakes, with constructiveness but still no free of guilt, due to their want to improve and win as much as they could.

Soon enough, though, fatigue had claimed some of them, the van slowly turning quieter as more and more people drifted off to sleep, taking advantage of the time they had left until they got back to their high school to regain some energy. 

At the back of the van, however, Tobio and Hinata had been on a constant on and off, varying mostly from lazy talk to the excited comments that Hinata blurted out though in a considerably lower voice, thoughtful about his sleeping teammates.

“Do you remember that awesome save Noya did? He was like pheeeewww , just in time!” Hinata was rambling on, accentuating everything he said with his hands in an exaggerated fashion that some may found annoying, but Tobio could only think that it was so Hinata of him .

“Aw, I really wish I could do amazing stuff like that” he said in a softer voice but with a fierce look on his eyes that Tobio could imagine without turning to look at him – but he still did, staring probably for a few more seconds than necessary before answering.

“You will” Hinata was now looking at him too, with not only his eyes but his whole face lighting up more, if that was even possible. He felt seen by Kageyama’s words, but Tobio was the one who felt opened underneath the weight of that determined look, as though he was challenging Kageyama, saying without a word you know I will .

And, oh, Tobio was so sure he would.

Silence stretched over them, making Tobio lose track of time as he disappeared in his own thoughts, unable to think about any other thing that wasn’t Hinata in the match they had just played. Every single play he had executed, either planned or not, was breathtaking for everyone who watched. That was Hinata’s effect: he was wild and extraordinary, and he made everyone want more of him – even if it was just a glimpse of himself.

Tobio sometimes wondered if Hinata was equally as magnetic to everyone as it appeared to him, or if it was something that only he was able to perceive.

Something in that thought made Tobio feel warm inside. That, mixed with the euphoria still bubbling quietly in his interior, spurted within him some audacity to finally face Hinata with the unbearable truth of his feelings towards him. The moment deserved it: their win had been great for the team’s morale; therefore, whether Hinata’s response was good or not for him, he wouldn’t die from it, Tobio rationalized. He really wanted to believe that.

Breaking the quiet settled among them with a sharp inhale, Tobio turned his whole body to confront the ginger boy face to face. But, once again, he was left with the words stuck on his throat as he was met with the sight of Hinata dozing off beside him, unaware of the words that seemed would never leave Tobio’s mouth – or not yet, at least.

Tobio released the breath he was holding in, slowly, looking at Hinata and noticing his reddened cheeks from the exhaustion and his natural body heat, his own almost matching that shade but not quite, as if shy of being caught staring at the boy. He was content just from watching him sleep, silent though his mouth was hanging slightly open, soft sighs escaping through it every now and then. 

Tobio shifted, realigning his posture back against the seat since there was no use for him to be facing the boy if he wasn’t going to speak any time soon. So, carefully, he relaxed back again, his head taking a second longer to accommodate properly as his eyes couldn’t be torn apart from the sight beside him – apparently in denial of doing so.

His movements had been slow and careful enough to not startle the sleeping boy, but with the final slump of his shoulders, Hinata fell right into Tobio’s personal space – his head landing naturally on Tobio’s shoulder, his hair tickling his nose barely, and the smell engulfing him completely, without permission, but oh, so welcomed.

The press of his left side had also fallen into Tobio’s right one, their arms grazing in their whole length, Hinata’s knuckles brushing against Tobio’s lazily open hand, palm facing up. His sight immediately turned towards that new point of contact between them – their hands had touched before, in high-fives and when they tugged at their limbs and clothes when they played-fought each other. But this was different. There was no force nor rush between them – just the unmoving warmth of Hinata’s smaller hand, lingering enough for Tobio to notice the calluses that adorned it, and to count every single one of the lines that ran through it.

As if hypnotized by the mere sight, Tobio dared to move his hand as little as he could, trying to prove something by involving the faintest muscles there. The shift was almost unnoticeable, the movement probably more distinct in the tension of his tendons, rather than in the position of his hand and fingers. But, then again, he was onto something.

If Hinata had as much as fallen into Tobio like a dead weight and didn’t even blink awake, then surely the ghost of some fingers or the heat of a hand cupping his own wouldn’t even get his breath to change in his slumber. That was logical to think.

And so, Tobio followed his reasoning, stretching his long fingers and moving his hand low enough so Hinata’s hand would fall into it by inertia. Like that, he noticed that, even though Hinata’s hand was smaller, it wasn’t by much. Their greater difference resided just in the length of their fingers, which Tobio wrapped around Hinata’s, engulfing his whole hand with the lightest touch, but with the grand intention to just hold . 

If his thumb had claimed to have its own life, that was something Tobio couldn’t intervene with, watching as it caressed over every finger, enjoying the way it made his skin tingle under the weight of Hinata’s body, even if it was just his hand.

The whole trip back to Karasuno High School, their hands remained intertwined like that, although unnoticed by Tobio, who had dozed off at some point until they arrived. Still, Tobio’s theory had been right: not once had Hinata been awoken by Tobio’s touch – thirst did at some point, though, and Hinata had tried to reach for his bottle of water, but that would have meant he had to let go of his hand trapped between Tobio’s fingers – that he registered seconds after blinking awake, not startling the tiniest bit at the sight–, and so he dismissed the idea, letting his eyes fall shut again and rearranging his cheek to rest more fully on Kageyama’s side.

The only change in their breaths had been a content sigh escaping from them both, more than once throughout their way back.

4

Sometimes, Tobio stopped to think twice about this whole situation, for his own sanity. He tried to point out the facts; to put everything in retrospect as he gathered up every detail of Hinata, pinning them up in his mind, one by one.

First, he thought about the picture of him. When he looked at Hinata, he found the most beautiful smile he had ever seen, blinding for common, mortal eyes like his. It didn’t even matter when you were looking – it was always there, welcoming you any time of the day.

But when he thought about that, it was impossible not to imagine the eyes that were always accompanying those smiles – all bright and round as they looked up and around all the time, while also sometimes squinting from how hard he was scrunching up his face with uncontainable happiness.

And when you thought about Hinata and happiness, that was basically saying the same thing. Because Hinata was a ray of sunshine, all bubbly and radiant and beaming at everything that surrounded him. He was a person you wanted around – and one that you just knew would be there without having to ask him to.

And Tobio, when he thought about all of that, he felt suddenly overwhelmed with unspoken feelings.

Not the type he used to be embarrassed about, when he had first figured he liked Hinata Shouyou – those were the funny feelings, like the gut-wrenching nervousness of making eye contact with him even for a second, or of knowing they would be sitting next to each other even if they spent most of their time together, anyways.

No, these were different. 

From time to time, Tobio experienced some kind of dread when it came to thinking about how much he had allowed those feelings to engulf him fully. Because, underneath all the anxiety bubbling inside of him due to the childish feelings, he had left a space that had been slowly filling up with something that now hurt to try to take away.

Because, without understanding what he was doing, he had let himself believe that there was hope for him and his attempts at trying to confess to Hinata.

Hope that – no matter how he never got to speak up about his feelings – had never left him. A tiny, little spark that was always there and never subsided, ready to ignite again when he felt courageous until days or weeks after.

Incredulous, poor little thing he was, Kageyama Tobio.

He had just been so naive this whole time. 

And it only got worse when he first attempted to step back from his mission – which had been once this glorious goal for him to achieve.

The thing was, hope was slowly drenching off of him as he tried to bear with those dispirited thoughts. But dealing with stuff that only happened inside his head was one thing; stepping back and watching how things were in reality, was another.

Before, when Tobio was close , he noticed all those little things: his ginormous smile of longer canines, his glinting hazel eyes framed by few ginger lashes among his darker ones, his never-ending contentment. Every single detail was small, but great just because Tobio knew it belonged to Hinata.

Now, however, standing from afar, he realized the actuality of things. And the bigger picture was not so far from how he used to perceive things – and maybe that was what made it harder for him.

From where he stood after quitting his mission, Hinata remained bright and joyous and beautiful – there were some things that were just intrinsicate to him. You could not have Hinata Shouyou without having any of that. It was just his nature – his existence. And by acknowledging that, Hinata came into life. So not only did he exist in his own, but in everyone else's.

And, oh, how could anyone not look at him, enthralled by his force of energy to just exist, and extend the privilege of his being to everyone else who was also there, at the same time and space. 

Looking away from Hinata was a hard thing to do, but Tobio convinced himself in doing so just because it pained him enough to watch Hinata be his usual self, oblivious to the way Tobio seemed to be sick, all those steps afar from him; unaware of the uneasiness munching down on Tobio when he thought that Hinata wasn’t even aware that he wasn’t there anymore .

Oh, and the worst thing besides that? That, upon quitting his sight from the boy, he had found out the way people looked at Hinata, reacting to his funny responses and following his every movement with attentive eyes, so clearly in there that they saw Hinata for how beautiful and extraordinary he just was.

Tobio wasn’t alone on that take; though he was right then. Alone in the spacious gym, thinking if his own eyes were a reflection of his feelings, imagining his face taking on the look he saw on everybody when they spoke to Hinata.

Wondering if Hinata’s own face lit up the same way it did with him than with everyone else.

It was exhausting, feeling this way and being unable to say anything. Because he didn’t have the right, didn’t have an excuse to justify his feelings to the boy – but, most importantly, because he could understand why people looked at Hinata that way. He could number every single reason why everyone felt like a magnet when it came to the boy, and he would still be sure he had a thousand more reasons of his own than anyone because he just saw Hinata in a different way.

Or at least he wanted to believe so.

So, on days like those, Tobio didn’t even think about what place he would take Hinata on a date, nor the words he would use to ask him out nicely. Hell, he didn’t even think about doing as much as confessing , because seeing Hinata interact and be around other people had made Tobio realize that the boy looked at everyone with stars on his eyes – because he just seemed to have eyes that shone as bright as a whole goddamn galaxy –, so the times Tobio had locked eyes with him and had caught them glimmering in return, it must had been their usual spark and nothing more.

Nothing for Tobio to hope for .

Hinata just held that spark to him, one that was aimed even at acquaintances. And, sometimes, Tobio couldn’t shake off the idea that he was barely that to Hinata – mere partners on the court, not even close to being friends (although Tobio had never found anyone like him – in any sense, and it just pained him ).

So, whenever Tobio stumbled into this train of thought, he immediately crossed out all of his intentions to dare to speak up, preferring to bottle up every single one of his feelings than blurting out something that would cost him his biggest friendship ever - but, overall, not wanting to become the only person in the whole world that Hinata didn’t look up at with stars in his eyes.

5

On the days Tobio was not feeling angsty, he was fighting for his stupid little life .

Apparently, as a first year, it was basically nature to be at the end of the teasing chain his teammates pestered him with; or, as the dumb reason Tanaka had given him, that it was all according to God’s will, but rather provoked by those same idiots, for him to go through hell at school due to his little crush . 

Of course, Tobio had been oblivious to it on Monday morning as he arrived early to the first practice of the day, when the sun was barely breaking into the horizon, the purple of the sky taking more on the hues of orange dripping from the distant star, evoking every being to come to life with the new day.

As if on cue, a second person came into view, but only until the sight of their black uniform was visible too, because their hair had taken on the exact same shade of orange the sun was shining with – a soft yet magical color that made Hinata’s ginger hair erupt vibrantly.

Tobio had gulped to damp his mouth and throat, which had suddenly felt too dry and uncomfortable at the sight. Tobio himself was uncomfortable; mostly awkward as he could only stand still and watch as Hinata walked all the way to him, standing right in front of the closed gymnasium doors, fingers wiggling at his sides.

Once Hinata stood mere feet away from him, Tobio stopped pretending that he was looking around in an attempt to disguise him staring at the boy, and finally settled his eyes where they craved to be: focusing on an orange color he had never seen before until that moment, reflected on top of Hinata’s messy hair, now honey-tinted, and its way darker shade in some flecks inside Hinata’s hazel eyes.

“Hi, Kageyama!” his voice was bubbly as always, but the words had come off softer as if conscious of the early hours. Still, he sounded perfectly awake, most likely having talked to his mother before leaving the house, or even to himself as he biked all the long way down to the school. It was probably the second option though, given how early the boy woke up every day, his mother surely still asleep when he left his home. Tobio sort of relished the feeling of his belief of being the first other person Hinata talked to this morning. 

It took him a while to remember to answer Hinata's greeting, the silence having stretched on for a second longer among them, yet not becoming awkward – though Tobio sure felt a bit of that himself.

“Hinata.” It was poor in comparison, even with the nod of his head accompanying his greeting, but it fitted his way of being, so it was fine. Though Tobio wanted to do better than fine; he wanted to be good – to be enough for Hinata, or at least be more than just his name being said instead of engaging in a conversation with the boy that he had all for himself .

“Uh…” Tobio trailed off, his mouth taking charge before a thought had formed in his mind to be pronounced. “How are you?” there went a coherent sentence, and it should have really stayed like that, but he had put so much effort into coming up with something to say, that words were threatening to spill out now – not caring anymore how right they could be. “Is the cold… not so cold… now… for you?” he heard himself, and he bit down in his tongue to stop himself from keep on talking and to avoid feeling more dumb .

He was just not so good at small talk when it didn't involve volleyball.

Still, Hinata didn’t look weirded out by Kageyama’s words, only blinking once as he digested them, making sure he had understood his question.

“I’m feeling good today! I couldn’t practice yesterday because Natsu kept me busy with some new game she had played on Friday and suddenly remembered. Ma made me play with her to calm her down, but it was actually fun so I lost track of time until it was too late, so I got a bit frustrated that I had missed my practice time but now it’s Monday and I get to practice again with everyone, so that’s nice!” taking a sharp inhale of air that probably made Hinata’s lungs fill to the brim, he continued rambling. “And yeah, I think the freezing mornings are over, but I still bring another sweater for when I have to ride my bike, since it’s colder with the speed and the times I have to get going. But the chill is nice, you know? I like not sleeping with sweat dampening my pillows” Hinata made a face, and Tobio could perfectly picture the word yuck appearing on a bubble over his head like in the comics he had read. The thought made him feel like chuckling, so he did.

Hinata, who seemed like he could have continued rambling for quite some time, stopped and stared at Tobio, eyes wide and contemplative, words dying on his tongue and thoughts disappearing from his mind.

His silence and wide gaze were creeping out Tobio, though in a way that made his stomach turn and his cheeks light  up with embarrassment from being on the receiving end of Hinata’s attention. 

“What.” his question had come off too plain to sound like one, but it was still softly pronounced, somehow. Tobio felt his face heat up more.

“Oh, nothing, just-” Hinata was still staring, eyes bouncing from every feature in Tobio’s face, lingering the tiniest bit of a second longer on his lips, now pouting rather than showing the half smirk they had stretched into seconds before. “You… you smiled… and laughed ”. 

Tobio’s mind ran blank as he tried to remember what he had asked Hinata in the first place, but all he could fathom was the rambling he had been listening to attentively, and was now panicking because he didn’t know if Hinata thought that he was mocking him, so he couldn’t help but panic even more .

“Sorry” he whispered. He couldn't elaborate further, scared to mess up more.

“No, don’t be! Uh… It was nice, you know…” Hinata was trailing off, apparently unable to make up his mind, as well.

It was weird, to see Hinata and not have him running his mouth in his unstoppable fashion. Right then, the moment had turned into a staring contest between them both – or so it felt like to Tobio.

Then, a realization struck Tobio suddenly. He could use this situation to his advantage; a cover up in case his actual intentions weirded out Hinata even more. 

Not knowing what he would be apologizing for, but feeling like he owed Hinata something for turning him into his quiet self, Tobio thought that inviting him after their afternoon practice for some pork buns (or something more romantic, he still had to decide) was a good enough apology for whatever he had provoked on Hinata’s brain.

Yeah, that could work . Tobio would ask Hinata what he was doing later after their day was over and then propose the idea of grabbing food together, using the time until they got to the place to work out how he could speak up about his feelings regarding the boy.

It was now or never. And Hinata wouldn’t think it was weird - and even if he did, Tobio could always disguise his intentions and pretend it was another normal outing of theirs, and let the whole thing be an apologizing act for what he had induced on the boy earlier.

They had been staring at each other the whole time Tobio’s brain ran through his plan and, when he finally focused again on the sight before him, he noticed the way Hinata was looking up at him with the widest eyes, expectant of something that Tobio felt he would end up doing if he kept on staring a second longer.

So, for the first time in what felt like ages, Tobio could taste the words forming on his tongue; could feel his lungs stretch as they filled with air that was about to be exhaled around tose syllables he had been meaning to pronounce since he knew he was falling in love with Hinata Shouyou.

Slowly, but for the first time convinced, he muttered “Hinata–”...

…Only to be interrupted.

“OI! HINATA! KAGEYAMA!” Tobio was cut off by a loud call of both their names coming from where Hinata had appeared minutes ago. There now stood Nishinoya and Tanaka, who waved enthusiastically at them, the third years trailing behind them in a quieter entrance.

He and Hinata had turned upon hearing their names, but Tobio felt Hinata shift to face him once again, having heard the way he had called for him in a whisper. Tobio wanted, needed , to say what he now ached to blurt out, using the seconds they had until everyone gathered around the entrance of the gymnasium. He gulped, staring at Hinata and the way he was looking at him through his lashes like he also wanted to hear what Tobio had in mind, almost urging him to do it with those pleading eyes. And, even after a few seconds gone in silence, it still felt like the moment hadn’t evaporated between them, even as they were aware of the presence of the whole team arriving. 

But those few seconds stretched on for too long as Tobio admired the colors dancing in Hinata’s eyes, as well as something else he couldn’t identify, but somehow believed he understood .

“You’re here early!” Tanaka had reached where they stood, grabbing Hinata’s shoulder to shake him slightly. “You two are little freaks when it comes to volleyball, huh? Why else would you be so punctual on a Monday before six in the morning?” he laughed, amused but surely looking kind of sleepy.

“Sho!” Nishinoya was now beside Hinata as well, cheerfully palming him on the back and finally gaining his attention, though not completely as his eyes were yet to focus on the boys rather than skipping around everything.

“Hi, guys” Hinata was smiling but not bouncing like he did every morning, apparently still trying to regain his composure.

“Morning, guys” Daichi had walked to the front of the group, his feet aimed at the door of the gym and in sync with the jingling sound of the keys in his hand as he looked for the right one to open the doors. He had stepped between Hinata and Tobio, and was now slightly obstructing Tobio’s view from Hinata’s whole frame, but still being able to see the way his eyes were glued to the floor with a frustrated look on his face – one that Tobio guessed he also had himself, if the churning in his gut was anything to go by.

Suga was beside their captain, staring intently at Tobio but without seeming to have anything to say to him. He had, however, something to say to Hinata, since he called the boy while still holding his sight on Kageyama a second longer.

“Hey, Hinata, do you think you could help me bring some stuff from the club room? It’s not a lot but with an extra hand I wouldn’t have to go there twice. And we won’t be long gone” Suga was nice as ever, his voice soft and eyes understanding in a way that could give room to a 'no' as an answer; but then again, he was always so nice that it made you want to return as many favors to him as one could.

And, of course, Hinata agreed. “Sure, Suga-san!” He was smiling albeit not as eager as his usual self. But at least he was trying to.

Tobio was having a harder time in doing so.

Suga had smiled at him before starting to walk past everyone towards the club room with Hinata by his side. When they were a few feet away, Suga turned only to call Daichi’s name, nothing more, exchanging short nods when their eyes encountered, and continued as if nothing had happened.

Tobio hadn’t taken his eyes off Hinata’s frame the entire time, and before the pair of boys were too far to notice, Tobio thought he saw Suga’s face barely turning in his direction, as if not wanting Hinata to notice, and leaving Tobio with so many questions that only incremented as he caught Suga smiling in a reassuring manner, though Tobio didn’t understand why.

Still deep in the whirlwind of his thoughts, Tobio allowed himself to release a tired sigh, defeated once again. Maybe it was destiny stopping him, or how things were meant to be (or rather, not be ); maybe it was God saving him from the worst rejection ever, one he would probably not be able to deal with without turning into a miserable person in the process. Maybe…

A cough brought him back to reality – one where the whole Karasuno team was still outside the now open gymnasium and staring at Tobio in a way that made him feel cornered, even if they were all dispersed around him.

“Maybe you should try later”.

Tobio turned his head in the direction of the voice so fast that he heard a loud pop coming from his neck – one that everyone else seemed to have heard as well, judging from how they winced. His eyes landed on Daichi, who had been the one to speak in a reassuring manner while still managing to sport an amused look on his face.

“What- What are you talking about?” Tobio was scared. He didn’t know how much his captain could know – Jesus, Tobio didn’t even know what he knew. And why was he having this conversation in front of everyone? He was freaking out now, for sure.

Well, maybe he would end up fainting with all the fluttering his heart had been doing lately. And that was the thing Tobio was most sure about - he bet on that.

“Don’t play fool, Kageyama! We all can tell there’s something going on between you two!” Tanaka jumped in too quickly, almost seeming offended by the idea of Tobio hiding something from them, when the reality was that he was just clueless and still freaking out.

“You know, Suga was the one who came up with the idea of this ,” Daichi spoke, ignoring Tanaka entirely as he tried to actually explain everything to Tobio. “and you know that he doesn’t do things just because. Actually, he specifically asked me to tell you that he, and I quote, wouldn’t be even getting into this if he didn’t believe that you’ve got a chance with Hinata ” their captain offered as an explanation, fingers still raised by the sides of his face from the quote-unquote motion.

In a chorus, the boys let out a collective ahh ’s of realization, putting the pieces together. Then, somewhere amidst the group, Tsukishima’s voice was heard in a mutter of “Dear lord ”. 

“That explains a lot now!” Nishinoya half yelled, his face lit up with that eureka look written all over it. “Man, I kinda thought you already had something going on” he sounded like he was having a hard time believing the truth, but then tried one last time to say something more along the lines of supportive, “Well, if it looked that easy for us, that means it can’t be that hard for you two! Go for it, Kageyama!” he finished with an excited gaze and an open smile that bounced with his laughter.

Tobio didn’t know if he had to answer to that – or how he was supposed to do it–, so he just didn’t.

“I won’t lie to you, Kageyama, I also believed that you two were already together since you had been looking kind of sheepish around him, so I thought it was because of your new relationship status, or something like that…” Asahi chuckled as he scratched his beard, embarrassed of confessing his suppositions out loud. “But if that’s not the case, I also stand with these guys, although I say take all the time you need. The most important thing is to have confidence and believe in yourself to do everything you can.”

“That’s nice, Asahi, good one” Daichi thanked Asahi, making him look embarrassed over that small compliment – apparently forgetting his own advice of being confident.

Tobio had heard Asahi and he did agree with Daichi, but he was more overwhelmed by everything to give him some recognition too. What did they mean when they said that Hinata and him already seemed to be… ?

“Tsk”. 

His attention was shifted to the sudden sound that was so Tsukishima that his eyes landed immediately on the tall boy with renewed annoyance, just in time to see Yamaguchi hit him in the ribs with a quick swing of his elbow. Tobio felt slightly better at that.

“Tsukki, stop it” Yamaguchi whispered in a hushed tone that still showed his own annoyance.

“Remember, this is team bonding time , everyone” Daichi supplied in a way too gentle voice.

“I don’t want to” Tobio glared at the blond for being so annoying though in vain. Tsukishima stood immune to Tobio’s disdain, his whole body relaxed and his glasses partially hiding his own eyes and rather having all the attention on his teasing smirk.

“Team bonding time!” Came again in their captain's voice, though there was a hint of a warning in the tone, this time.

Giving up so he didn’t have to hear that phrase another time, Tsukishima scoffed before elaborating.

“You’re an idiot,” a brief pause that he exaggerated to see the effect it had on Tobio, whose scowl deepened. “if you can’t actually see the way Hinata looks at you.” Noticing how Tobio’s expression faltered, he sighed, pained, but continued. “Just so you know and we can all get over this, I really don’t think that I’d be able to name someone as weird as you to keep you company besides Hinata” he stopped another second to show how serious he was talking, in case anyone else may accuse him of mocking Kageyama. “And though I mean it, I also really hate knowing that because that means I get to know two of the biggest weirdos in the whole world”.

Somehow, the way he had phrased it all made Tobio appreciate Tsukishima’s contribution to whatever the whole dynamic was.

(Team bonding time, as Daichi had called it).

“I say let’s not think deeply about it at all” Tanaka’s voice was heard again, though now brushing off importance to the matter as opposed as before. “You and Hinata already look like lovers and you say you haven’t even confessed, man!” Daichi protested in the back but Tanaka didn’t even falter “Let facts speak to you!”. Tobio blinked, trying to think of all those facts he seemed to be so sure about.

(He got nothing; but, then again, it was hard to split his mind into so many thoughts at once).

“Uhm, Kageyama–” Yamaguchi's shy voice came out of the more nervous looking boy, a blush already framing his freckled cheeks. “If I may say something, I think everyone is right, at least to some extent”, he was sheepishly smiling a crooked grin, eyes glued to the floor, but apparently eager to continue with whatever his argument was.

“I think you should remember that, above all, you two are best friends. And that will always come first. So, no matter how weird or hard it may turn out to be, you can always work it out together…” his gaze suddenly lifted from the ground, eyes so intense but that didn’t look into Tobio’s direction, rather searching immediately for Tsukishima’s, who flinched and pretended that he didn't feel the blush creeping up his neck.

Tobio’s eyes followed that interaction that he also didn’t understand, but it didn’t matter. His brain had fixated on Yamaguchi’s words, replaying over and over in his mind as he pondered on the nature of his relationship with Hinata, and how he really was his best friend.

If Tobio wasn’t going to pass out, he would probably break down crying first.

He was soon too overwhelmed, his brain stuffed with information that he wasn't aware of twenty minutes ago. But his meltdown was interrupted – before it could even properly begin – with the sight of Hinata and Suga appearing in a far corner carrying each two boxes of something that couldn’t be too heavy, but that still made Hinata’s cheeks redden from exertion.

It isn’t fair , Tobio thought, remembering that there had once been a time when he would have thought that Hinata looked ridiculous or absurd or at least funny with so many red tones on his body.  But now, he was under a spell that didn’t allow him to see it that way; instead, all he could notice was Hinata’s bright hair sticking slightly to his sweaty, glistening skin, and his cheeks flushed pink both from physical effort and from how big his smile stretched as he walked, laughing at something Suga was saying – and from how it impossibly widened once he saw Tobio standing still outside the gym.

“Waiting for us?” he asked, getting closer to him, his head peeking from one side of the boxes.

“Uh-”.

“I think he was waiting for you, Hinata. Daichi wanted us to warm up in pairs, or so he told me this morning. Is that right, Kageyama?” Suga intervened in a casual fashion, though Tobio didn’t know what he was talking about.

Looking around to see if someone had understood what he was referring to (and maybe help him out in the process), Tobio noticed he was now alone outside the gym, from where he could perfectly see everyone rushing into the court to pretend they had been warming up for a while now. They must have hurried inside at the first sight of the boys – though Tobio had no reasons as to why they left him out on his own, or what they had in mind.

But Tobio wouldn’t tire out his brain – he had given up on that long minutes ago. Instead, he focused on the conversation, and aimed for a nonchalant tone as he spoke, wanting to appear as sure and in control of the situation as Suga had, “Y-yeah. That’s it. Uh-huh”. 

All he felt was dumb.

Hinata perked up at the confirmation of that, not noticing (or not wanting to notice) how odd Tobio sounded. “Cool! Let me lay this stuff down and I’ll get with you to start warming up, okay?”.

As if on instinct, Tobio’s mouth opened before he knew what was at the tip of his tongue “Let me help you”.

Hinata seemed to be thinking about it, or so Tobio thought, as he was left stuck in place and staring at the taller boy with an expression Tobio couldn’t quite decipher.

“O-okay”.

So, Tobio bent a bit to place his hands underneath the boxes, taking Hinata by surprise as he probably thought that he was going to just help him with the upper one and not with both . He jumped in his place, exalted at the sudden touch of cold fingers grazing against his, their hands out of sight under the boxes, but neither of them made an effort to remove them – Tobio with the excuse of getting a better grip; and Hinata just because he was busy staring at Kageyama’s close up face, now in level with his own, and not daring to move a single muscle.

“Ready?” Tobio asked, squaring his shoulders to lift the weight off Hinata’s arms, but asking first so the boxes wouldn’t fall from lack of support from both ends. He was watching Hinata’s face rather hypnotized than attentively (unaware of Hinata being engrossed in the sight of him as well), so he was at fault when he didn’t register that Hinata’s nod was most likely done instinctively than consciously.

Chaos ensued.

Tobio had planned to do everything in a single motion: from securing the grip on the boxes, to lifting them up and turning around to start marching towards where Hinata would have instructed him to leave them. And so he did – albeit not exactly.

His plan had failed before the very first step was done, since Hinata hadn’t let go of his own grip on the boxes in the slightest, resulting in his hands being trapped under Tobio’s the whole time – as he stood fully straight, as he spun, and as he intended to give the first step past the gym doors. Meaning: his body was submitted to Tobio’s every movement; therefore, he followed suit – most likely against his will (and his unconscious brain).

To Tobio, it took him a second longer to notice what was going on. At the beginning, his hands were gripping the box slightly tighter as he felt more resistance that he had processed as a heavier weight – though one he could still handle, so he didn’t fixate on it.

On the other hand, Hinata’s mind was working in a similar manner, but with a completely different approach. He just had to regain his consciousness to command his body into letting go. So he did – though with the worst timing ever.

Tobio, having gotten used to applying a certain force, started walking in the exact same moment that Hinata freed his grip from the bottom of the boxes, the resistance suddenly disappearing as Tobio hauled them up a bit more, causing him to lose his balance. It could have been only a little slip of his footing, really, but one of his feet ended up tangling with one of Hinata’s as he tried to step into the gymnasium to give room for Kageyama to regain his stability – but resulting in the complete opposite way as he stumbled into the small step at the bottom of the door.

The bouncing of the volley balls stopped abruptly at the commotion caused by the door. The boxes fell first, mere inches away from where Tobio landed not even a second later, no damage induced besides the air being forced out of his lungs with the impact of hitting the ground.

But he had spoken too soon.

Upon him, Tobio could see, almost in slow motion, how Hinata was now the one to stumble with one of Tobio’s stretched out legs, the disturbance of his balance throwing him to the ground, though not quite fully.

He had fallen, sure, but something separated him from touching the floor – though barely.

What Tobio felt first was a sudden weight landing on top of him. Then, his brain registered two things: the thud of what had fallen upon his body, and a pained yet soft groan muttered into his own personal space. As he focused his eyes, he was met with the sight of Hinata’s face inches away from his, his sharp breaths tingling Tobio’s skin within reach. 

The fuss around him caused by teenage boys yelling and half a dozen feet rushing closer to where he lied was just some noise in the background of his disoriented mind. He didn’t grasp the meaning behind any of it because he was so confused after the fall, so he made no effort to understand the weight hovering over him. He kind of guessed he could stare at the boy with the endless blush spreading from his hairline and down to the collar of his shirt for as long as he wanted, his lightheaded state to blame.

But then, some consciousness filtered into his fogged up brain, and it hit him. 

The position, the points of contact and the person who he had on top of him . It was dizzying, the effect of blood reaching his face in speed record to reflect his embarrassment, only to feel it disappear and drench off his whole body at the sudden panic in the deepest end of his gut.

With a last look into Hinata’s blushing face, Tobio’s sight turned into a blur before his head hit the ground as he fainted, unconscious of the madness that erupted around him after he passed out.

Well, he only hoped that Hinata would wait for him until he woke up.

+1

Hinata Shouyou was trembling.

It was Friday and the school day was over, as well as the afternoon practice. His body felt nicely sore, and his right hand was still buzzing low with the memory of the last ball he had spiked. He knew, without looking at his palm, that it would still be flushed from all the hitting involved that day – but yet he still did. Shouyou turned his hand up and admired the reddened area, comforted by the things he just knew that would be there.

Everything that day had been as common as any other day. His morning bike, their early practice, period after period, lunch and restroom breaks; faces and words exchanged, they were all expected to happen in the everyday-life-of Hinata Shouyou – at least up until that moment.

So, if he needed to be grounded by something as familiar as the visible sting on his hand, then he would stare for as long as he wanted into his right open palm. After all, it was all he had at hand (no pun intended) to calm him down before risking the other most familiar thing he had had these past months.

Glueing his eyes to the fading flush, Shouyou did not dare to blink at all in case he were to miss something in that same quick manner he feared so much. (Though he was probably projecting then, because in his mind miss became lose , and that something turned into someone – someone whose name he had gotten used to call everyday, and whose face he could picture without breaking a sweat, no matter how many years could pass in between from their last sight).

Thankfully for him, weekdays meant spending ten minutes tops without seeing Kageyama Tobio at school - where he casually was.

As if summoned, the boy stepped out of the club room and aimed for the stairs, going down skipping two steps at the time, and immediately reached where Shouyou was sitting at the end of the staircase. He looked as he always did, with an almost imperceptive exhaustion that he only sported after the end of the day, and one that Shouyou had learned to spot with ease, so he took a second longer that evening to appreciate the slight drop of Kageyama’s eyelids. After all, it was another part of his everyday-life. 

Though he didn't know for how much longer, after today.

“Let’s go” Shouyou had also noticed that, besides his exhaustion, Kageyama was open to more conversation after a whole school day – more specifically on their way home, when there was no one else but him to talk to and listen to as they walked. He was usually the one as well to prompt their return with questions like ready to go? or you’ve got everything? or with a simple let’s go , but only beginning to walk after Shouyou had taken the first step.

That evening, however, since Shouyou had made up his mind with a plan that could change everything in a split of a second, he restrained himself from answering properly or even from producing a sound. What he did, though, was stand from where he had been crouching down, but with no further intention of moving from his place. He just stared with his head tilted slightly upwards to meet Kageyama’s confused gaze, waiting for the boy to say something.

Shouyou, on the other hand, didn’t look like he had his heart beating up in his throat, the pressure and weight of everything obstructing both the passage of air and the way for those words to be spelled out loud for the first time in his life.

Shouyou  just hoped – and prayed and died for the idea – that he hadn’t read it all wrong.

Taking in a deep breath, Shouyou used those seconds to just look into Kageyama’s deep blue eyes, now sprinkled with tints of confusion. And then he spoke.

“Kageyama,” it was barely the first word and Shouyou’s lungs were already giving out, sounding out his name in a soft voice that matched his nervous behaviour, but one that was far from how determined he was to get this out of himself. 

Kageyama’s eyes had replaced their confusion with surprise at the softness in his voice, and were beginning to be framed by a faint blush that Shouyou saw being spread throughout his whole face the more he continued talking.

“I-I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a w-while now,” he tried not to focus so much on those little words he stuttered over. He had to keep going, “probably since the day of the practice match against Nekoma, when we were in the van – or maybe since before, I don’t know!” his nerves were taking over him the closer he got to say what he wanted. So, trying to calm down, he took a second to properly breathe.

But Kageyama had interpreted that second as an opportunity to step in, now looking panicked, too, his eyes widening as he rushed to say “Hinata, let me explain-”.

“I can’t point out everything in great detail, okay? But I do remember you giving me your jacket that evening that was too cold even with two layers on, so why hand out your only cover when you still had to walk over five blocks until you reached the safety of your home?” his voice was coming out quick, stumbling over words he seemed like he had thought about before at a fast pace. He looked desperate, but overall, helpless.

“It’s not what you th-” Kageyama was nervous, not sure where Shouyou wanted to take this. He just thought that covering up his real intentions and every single past attempt at confessing as something else was the best option – just in case Hinata had found out about his feelings and this was a confrontation because he felt awkward and probably grossed out by Tobio’s naivety.

“I don’t even know what else is there that you’ve said or done because sometimes you act all nice and gentle by giving me your jacket, or offering tosses out of nowhere, or by caressing my hand subtly in a way that tickles me so I can always feel it…” Shouyou’s mouth was running a mile a second, wanting to get out of him everything he had planned to say. “But then you’re all you again, scowling at everything and not talking to me for hours in which I can only ask myself what is going on because I don’t understand, Kageyama ” when he finished, his chest was heaving and his eyes were frantically searching for something in Tobio’s eyes that he didn’t know if he would find.

“I’m sorry” it was all Kageyama could offer, defeated under Shouyou’s desperate gaze. Shouyou shook his head without averting his eyes, and could see Kageyama’s own glistening back at him but no tears threatening to spill from them. “I-I won’t do it again. I promise”. There were still no visible tears, but there was something that caught in his throat, a lump that made his words sound thick with a felt emotion he wasn’t allowing to be showed.

Shouyou felt himself run out of patience – mostly for himself, because apparently he wasn’t explaining well enough what he needed to get off his chest.

“No! You don’t get it! I don’t want you to stop any of that!” Shouyou felt, sounded and looked despaired as he had to say those words in a loud voice that was not exactly a yell “I am not asking for that.” He sniffled and Kageyama wondered if he was close to tears with that gesture. Shouyou himself wondered that too, waiting to feel the prickle of them in his eyes.

And as he waited, silence settled between them.

“I-I just want to know why you are doing it so I don’t get it all wrong… And if I already have, then so I can stop misreading it and stop this for once”.

“What do you mean by ‘this’, Hinata?” Kageyama could sense how dispirited Shouyou was, but asking that question was his ultimate priority, as his own heart longed to hear its answer first.

Shouyou’s whole body sagged, his shoulders hunching as he accepted defeat. But, with his last percentage of pride left on him, he didn’t look away from Kageyama’s eyes as he spoke, wanting to see them react to what he had to say.

“I-I think I’m falling in love with you.” Actually, Shouyou couldn’t do it, so his face fell immediately to the ground before he could see the words sink in on Kageyama "And I don’t even know if I have the reasons for it – god, I don’t even know if I have the right to or if I’m just ruining everything by admitting this”.

He couldn’t see Kageyama’s face, or even any part of his body, actually. His face was pointed to his left, his eyes downcast as in to shield him from a vision that he didn’t know if he could bear.

“Hinata” Kageyama called, tentatively, and Shouyou wished he could also shield his ears from words that would probably hurt him.

“Hinata” he tried again, but Kageyama still got no answer, guessing that the ginger boy was waiting for him to say something that wasn't just his name. 

And Shouyou, aware of his name being called, had once again fallen into staring at his palm vaguely. More time had passed since he last spiked a ball that day, so there was no buzz left in there to feel – instead, his hand was plainly shaking .

“Shouyou”. 

Without any warning, a sob broke out from the pit of his stomach, his guard going down at the new sound of his name being pronounced by Kageyama’s voice. His lips started to tremble slightly, and the prickle of tears finally reached the corners of his eyes. Still, all he could concentrate on was on Kageyama whispering in a voice that even himself seemed surprised he could muster.

“Come here” he reached out for the hand he could clearly see trembling, holding it between both of his own to try to lessen the anxious shaking. Shouyou felt the solid weight and the warmth engulfing him, but it was still not enough to bring the quivering to a full stop. 

So, not really knowing what to do, he just allowed Kageyama to continue maneuvering him under his soft yet firm grip.

Uncertain, Shouyou dared to lift his gaze but only enough to watch every movement unfolding before him, and was encountered with the sight of Kageyama's large hands unclasping to leave only one grasping his smaller one. Then, his eyes followed them as they trailed up to Kageyama's sternum, against where they were left resting, right between his ribcage and Shouyou’s chest – where he could feel his own heartbeat launching violently against it, a big contrast with Kageyama’s slower but still accelerated flutter.

When his attention shifted from their pulses, Shouyou noticed something else that would only threaten his heart to explode: somehow, the new arrangement of their limbs had hauled them into stepping closer to each other, whilst reducing Shouyou’s peripheral vision to the expanse of Kageyama's chest and shoulders – and just a tiny bit of his clavicle from under the collar of his shirt, if he dared to peek inside. Therefore, in that exact position, Shouyou wasn't aware of Kageyama’s other hand – the one not holding his –, so he startled at the sudden feeling of something hovering over his shoulders – something that Shouyou could understand what it was until its weight settled fully on top of him, his frame encircled by an arm that pulled him closer to Kageyama’s body, his own relaxing as soon as he was flushed against his torso.

The embrace should have been more awkward in Shouyou’s mind – given that it was their first hug and considering the fact that Kageyama was not used to being involved in any type of physical contact (let alone being the one who initiated it) –, but it was far from that. 

It felt so right. 

Like that, Shouyou couldn't help but notice that their bodies slotted together like a perfectly-put-together puzzle, with their height difference translating into a small gap that left Shouyou’s entire self trapped under Kageyama’s easy embrace; and one which allowed the taller boy to rest his cheek or his chin on top of a bed of soft, orange locks – plus the perfect view of those eyes that stared up at him every time.

The reminder of Hinata’s eyes awoke within him the necessity to look right into them. So, hoping that it would work out this time, he spoke once again, calling the boy's name to get his attention.

“Shouyou” Kageyama tested the name on his lips, repeating it over and over,  switching from saying it in different voice levels.

As he tried in a very low voice to enunciate Shouyou’s name, he heard himself and could admit that he sounded ridiculous. At the sound of it all, the boy finally looked up as Kageyama had intended to happen, with a little smile plastered on his blushing face, and looking like he was done suffering for once. But still, he couldn't help but permit some tears to spill quietly, though rather in relief than in pain.

"What?" He was smiling so bright, and only for Tobio to see, with his chin digging into Kageyama’s chest as he looked up at him with so much happiness in his eyes.

Kageyama remained silent, admiring. He paid close attention to Shouyou’s slightly damp cheeks that now stretched beautifully to uncover those pointy canines that Tobio was so fond of. Then, unaware of his own movements, he saw – rather than felt – his hands coming up to cup Shouyou’s face with delicacy, having noticed all of that out of the corner of his eyes since he was too engrossed by the sight that Hinata Shouyou was.

At the first touch of Kageyama’s hands on his face, Shouyou barely blinked; he did, however, react to it by widening his eyes and waiting in an expectant manner.

"Shouyou" Kageyama seemed hypnotized; almost as if under a spell that stopped his brain from functioning properly with the mere sight of the boy. He could only repeat his name like a prayer; could only give out his body to react to his presence by not being able to keep his hands to himself. 

"Yes?" Relishing the caresses on his face, Shouyou secured Kageyama’s hands, still cupping his face, with his own by circling the boy’s wrists to keep them there for as long as he could.

Something flashed behind Kageyama’s eyes, but it was gone just as quickly. Whatever it had been, it was powerful enough to prompt him into saying something else than his name.

"Shouyou," he could sense Kageyama's breathing pattern increase suddenly, so he tightened his grip around his wrists in case he needed some grounding.

But then Shouyou thought he would be the one who could use some help.

"Go out with me".

"Okay, so, just for the record," Shouyou spoke over a mouthful of his pork bun "Are we going to be... uh... normal? After this?"

Tobio was frowning at his own wrapped bun, still untouched.

"What do you mean by 'normal', exactly?" .

"Well, you know, we were friends, of course" Tobio nodded enthusiastically when he noticed Shouyou’s eyes lingered on him as if to confirm that he also thought that way, "but we were restless and competitive and sometimes we even threw hands at each other” he looked overly worried, probably believing that their dynamic would remain to be exactly the same – just with another title to go by.

"First of all, we're still friends. Friends that also date, I guess” Shouyou chuckled at his remark “But, uh... I think that I won’t be sticking to that dynamic fully, as I will want to spend more time doing some things that I couldn't do before because of manners, you know?"

Shouyou blushed furiously, stuttering so much to the point that nothing coherent came out of his mouth. For Tobio, it took him a second longer to understand what Shouyou seemed to be so embarrassed about – and when he got it, he immediately rushed to clear things out.

"Oh my god , no! Not that!" his flush matched with Shouyou’s for a moment before his brain supplied him with examples of what could have crossed the other boy’s mind, turning his face into a boiling mess. "I-I meant stuff like appropriate physical contact, mostly" he said, feeling like a thief caught red handed.

"Oh…" Shouyou had visibly relaxed after hearing that, the blood in his face returning to the places where it actually belonged.

"Yeah..." he cleared his throat, forcing himself to not entertain the line of thought that Shouyou had first assimilated - at least not right away. As he tried to calm down, a whole minute went by.

Then, Shouyou scanned his face shortly before questioning him. "Can I ask for what exactly you had refrained from due to manners, as you said?" he sounded utterly curious, so Tobio went past his shame to give him an answer. 

"Uhm- your, uh... your hair" it was more embarrassing to say that out loud than to think of any sinful thing that his brain had provided him from a minute ago. "Playing with your hair, mainly" Tobio couldn’t hold Shouyou’s gaze as he only blinked back at him, but he didn’t press him to say anything, either.

"You- you think that playing with each other's hair falls under the manners tag?" Shouyou was, apparently, genuinely surprised, but Tobio’s sheepish expression erased any doubt that he was hiding the real answer. 

"Well, it's not like it our friendship's nature was based on physical touch and being soft around each other" Tobio was pouting without looking into Shouyou’s eyes from embarrassment, not noticing the way Shouyou smiled and looked at him, like it was cute of him to believe something like that. He reached out for Tobio’s hand that was resting on top of the table, and gave it a light squeeze.

"Good thing it does now, right?" Tobio rearranged their hands so that they were intertwined in a second, his pout disappearing immediately at the touch, but only locking his eyes with Shouyou’s after appreciating their clasped hands first. He hummed in agreement then, given that his mouth was against Shouyou’s knuckles, busy placing a tiny, lingering kiss there.

Oh, Kageyama Tobio would definitely use all his boyfriend privileges to touch every inch of Shouyou's body.

Shouyou could feel his heart doing all kinds of flips inside his chest. For a whole moment, he just stared at the boy in front of him, amazed by his secret fondness over physical touch – and so grateful for it, as well, since he felt like a champion; like the ultimate conqueror of the entire world–

"I won, by the way" Tobio interrupted his thoughts with a line that Shouyou didn't understand at first, so he asked what that was for clarification. "This one, it was my win".

Shouyou’s brain had been zeroing on the way Tobio’s lips traced the tips of his fingers in a repeated motion so, for a moment there, he was just a pretty face kissing his hand and saying something to him.

That was until the words finally sunk in on Shouyou. 

"Hey! Not fair!" he childishly argued, retrieving his hand from Tobio’s hold to accentuate his dramatic disbelief, "You're playing dirty!".

"No, I'm not". Tobio had a talent for sounding nonchalant and masking his amusement when he started to bicker with Shouyou – which he loved, so he played along.

"Well, then, why would it be your point when we're here thanks to me, huh? Technically, legally and rightfully, it would be my point, in any case".

"I was the one who asked you out".

"But I confessed!".

"Yeah, but I tried, like, a million times to do that as well, so that would make a total of infinite points, granted" Tobio was just messing with him, clearly remembering all the times that he had given up on actually confessing.

"Doesn't count. I never got to hear a confession coming from you, so that settles it." Shouyou proclaimed, feeling like it was his win already.

"Okay. Let's say we're even, then." But he was wrong, apparently. 

"What?" He had to make sure he had heard that alright; after all, there were few times where they decided upon calling it even.

"Yeah, I mean, it was teamwork, wasn't it? I gave you the leads to believe I had feelings for you, so you got the courage to confess first." Tobio had his hand stretched in Shouyou’s direction, asking for his hand in a silent manner, and Shouyou offered it to him immediately "Right now, it's the same. I was the one who asked you out, but you agreed, and it resulted in this. In a tied game".

"But... I believe we were seventy-eight to seventy-five points each last time". Shouyou frowned, asking out of sheer curiosity, their play-argue act left behind.

" Nuh-uh . We're starting a brand-new score counter".

"For...?"

"Relationship related matters".

Shouyou smiled, knowing how to pick up their bickering from before. "Oh, so you're gonna keep going against me – against your own boyfriend, really?" He tried sounding dramatic with a fake-hurt voice, vowels elongated in every word to accentuate his act.

"Obviously. Don't you dare think that I'm gonna go all soft on you just because I'm in love with you." Tobio declared, aiming to continue with their fake argument, but stopping when he looked at Shouyou. 

There, at the other side of the small squared table where they sat with their legs tangled beneath, Shouyou was staring at him with stars taking up all the space in his eyes. And his smile, tiny in comparison to his usual grins, was, somehow, the happiest Tobio had ever seen on him. 

(Tobio would have to work on his nervousness if he wanted to last long in his relationship with Shouyou).

"I'm in love with you, too, Tobio" Shouyou muttered under his breath, but his face and eyes were so loud that Tobio had no doubt in believing he was. "Oh! We're also tied at that!" Shouyou chuckled, and Tobio was starting to discover how someone as energetic as him could exist so softly at the same time.

"Yeah," and he would gladly love both ends of Hinata Shouyou, as well. "until next time, at least".

Both of them smiled, accepting the challenge for the upcoming future. But in the meantime, they would only care for the present moment; a point at the time.

THE END.