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I just woke up from a dream,
Where you and I had to say goodbye
“Jinu?”
Violet hair cascades from her shoulders to the mattress down to the floor as Rumi slowly sits up in bed, her hands travel to the spot next to her devoid of warmth. Rubbing her eyes, she catches sight of the time: 3:04 AM.
Witching hour, she begins thinking of the horror film she watched the night before but shakes her head. Demons aren’t real.
Yawning, she stands up, determined to find the person who was supposed to be sleeping right next to her, “Jinu?” she calls out again. No response. She huffs. A small creak sounds as Rumi closes the door behind her.
Wherever you go, that’s where I’ll follow
Nobody’s promised tomorrow
“When we win, the Honmoon will be sealed. And that… will guarantee your freedom”
He could never forget those eyes. Her eyes. The determination shining in them – the hope.
Hope was a scary thing; it made you believe. And she… made him believe, for a minute.
“I… I don’t hear his voice” He looked at her, really looked at her. Words of promise fall on his lips so easily as though it was always meant to happen anyway.
But reality is not that simple.
You failed them, you left them. You’re a coward, Jinu. Gwi-ma’s voice haunted him as it always had. Don’t think you can escape what you are. Don’t think you can escape from me.
I don’t plan to, he thought. But a little corner in the back of his mind protested.
Lost in the words that we scream
I don’t even wanna do this anymore
“How could you do this?!”
She pushed him as hard as she could. It isn’t enough to budge Jinu, yet he felt his heart clench. He didn’t even know it was possible. What difference did it make? He had already hurt her.
And so, he lies again. It’s what he’s good at anyway. “I just needed you to trust me, that’s all.”
But Rumi always had a way to extract some truth from him no matter what she did, “You’re a good person. I know you are –”
“I left them, okay! I left my mother and sister to starve while I slept on silk sheets with my belly full every night. I left them,” he choked out, “I left them.”
“But that’s not who you all are. That’s just your demon talking. You have to fight it –”
He roared, “That’s not how it works!”
“Yes it is!” She roars back as the Honmoon vibrates with her power. Her patterns glowing an angry red as her demonic power disperses to the air. He scoffs, her outburst proving him right.
“Listen to yourself. Is it working?” Jinu sees heartbreak in her eyes, and he lets himself believe that he relishes in it.
“All we get to do is live with our pain, our misery. That’s all we deserve.” Vanishing from her sight, he goes to the demon realm. Clutching a pillar for support, Jinu stared at the fire burning above them all.
Consuming them all.
You already know what you mean to me
And our love’s the only war worth fighting for
She first sees his laptop, the screen illuminating the plants on the dining area. Papers on the side, his headphone discarded, and his guitar propped against the wall where their pictures where hung. The most prominent one of her, Mira, and Zoey of when they were children in a park.
Rumi smiles, she walks over to some papers that have flown away with the wind and gathered them in her hands. Out of the corner of her eye she sees him by the balcony. She tilts her head at him before shaking her head. She glances at the paper in her hands and notes the scratches and scribbles before placing them back on the small pile.
She walks toward him on her tip toes. “Boo.” She exhales into his ear.
“Ahwhatthefu—” smooch. Rumi grins.
“What are you doing here so late?”
Jinu shakes his head, “Nothing.” He raises his hand, and she notices for the first time the pack of grape juice in his hands.
“Hmm,” she muses, and scooches over his hands to nestle between him and the railing. The city lights blinking not so far away. “Doesn’t seem like nothing to me.”
He sighs, placing his chin on top of her head. His free hand grasping one of hers and stretching it to the horizon. “I couldn’t sleep. Had a nightmare.”
He runs his finger on her hand, “So I thought I might as well get some lyrics for the next album.”
Rumi looks up at him, causing Jinu to lower his gaze. “Wanna talk about it?”
“… No.”
Rumi shrugs, “Fine.” Choosing instead to grasp his hand with both of hers and trying to massage it, the opal on her left ring finger glinting with the moonlight.
Jinu kisses her cheek softly.
“Just had a dream where we were fighting.”
“Whaaat, we rarely fight.”
“Hush. It’s different this time.”
If the world was ending, I’d wanna be next to you
If the party was over and our time on Earth was through
“The scars are part of me, darkness and harmony. My voice without the lies, this is what it sounds like!”
He’s frozen. Here she was again, with that hope in her eyes and the confidence in her stride. Her voice reverberating throughout Namsan Tower.
He feels movement beside him, feels himself being tugged as the other boys moved to the whim of their master. But Jinu is rooted in his place. Mesmerized and horrified that she still chooses to fight even as her patterns threaten to consume her.
Their gazes meet, and Jinu knew. I will free you.
But Gwi-ma had other plans. The fire devours the lesser demons as sacrifice to release demonic fire aimed toward Rumi.
A part of him hoped that she succeeds, despite the rational part of his brain telling him to stop. Don’t look at her. But when he sees her struggling to contain the fire, he snapped.
He found himself in between her and Gwi-ma. It burns, burns, burns – but he’s relieved she’s not struggling anymore.
“I’m sorry. For everything.” He didn’t have time to explain everything. He hoped he had. All the lies, all the regrets, all the pain. But he wished it would reach her.
As parts of him burned away, he smiled, hoping that she will remember his face rather than the situation, “You gave me my soul back. And now, I give it to you.”
Jinu closed his eyes.
I’d wanna hold you just for a while and die with a smile
If the world was ending, I’d wanna be next to you
After a while of lounging in the balcony, Rumi huffs. “Come on, we really need to get some sleep.”
Jinu hums from the top of her head, “Two more minutes,” as he plays with her fingers and her hair. She lets him do as he pleases.
“Meow”
The two shift their heads to the side as a gray cat lightly struts to the balcony. A faint kakaka was heard from inside the apartment.
“Hey little tiger,” Rumi coos, leaving Jinu’s embrace and picking up the cat. “Why’d you leave your buddy in the room? Did you miss mommy and daddy?”
“…” Jinu shifted his eyes away.
Seeing this, Rumi smirks. “I know, baby, you got woken by daddy too, huh? Well, we should get back to the room then. Before you lose sleep.” As she placed the cat back down, it immediately faced the bedroom as if guiding the two. “Come on, Jinu. Let’s go back to bed.” She motioned.
Jinu sighs, “All right.”
As they walked back to the bedroom, Rumi noticed Jinu staring into the ground. Whatever woke him was still gnawing at him. She tightened her grip on his hand for a moment.
When they entered, Derpy beelined for the cat bed beside Sussie’s birdcage. Rumi took to her side of the bed. “I’ll be the big spoon this time.” Jinu raises an eyebrow but doesn’t protest.
When her arms envelops him, Rumi kisses the top of his head. “I’ll always be here for you, Jinu.”
She felt him freeze a tad bit, then relax. “I’ll always be here for you too.”
“Be here for you even if the world’s ending.”
“… I know.”
“Even if your tats are all saggy and washed up.”
“Hey, you got tattoos too.” He complains.
“I know, you’ll still love me even when they’re all saggy, right?”
He huffs, “Yeah.”
Rumi smirks, “Thought so. Good night. I love you.”
“… I love you, too.”
If the world was ending, I’d wanna be next to you.