Chapter Text
Dimitri watched helplessly as Byleth collapsed on the forest grass. He flinched for a moment, fatigue threatening to buckle his knees. But he couldn't. Not yet. “Professor! What’s wrong?! Are you…uh…Are you asleep?” He rushed forward to check on his beloved professor. Her pulse wasn't there! For a moment he panicked, but then he saw her peacefully breathing. He relaxed. It must have been his idea. “What is happening these days? Well, it matters not. We must get you help, and fast.” he sighed.
So far it had been an exhausting day. The battle to hunt Jeralts’ murderers and then the transformation must have really taken a toll on Byleth. No wonder she collapsed like a falling log. He carefully removed her sword and hung it over his back. Then, without wasting any more time, he gently collected her in his arms. “Sorry professor, but I have no choice but to carry you back.” He rushed through the woods. The wind and the sound of rustling leaves were his only companions. The rest of the blue lions and their battalions had already headed back to the monastery. The chatter and cart noises weren’t audible anymore. Even Dedue had left, his aid priceless for carrying back their injured friends. Byleth’s presence must have made it easier for Dedue to leave him behind.
Walking through the thick foliage, Dimitri stole a look at the shiny minty hair. Byleth's head rested on his chest. For someone as fierce as she, he was baffled by how fragile and small she felt in his arms. It felt unreal that not so long ago she had pierced the sky and appeared in front of her enemies, like a personification of retribution. He would never forget how she looked that moment, hard and determined and invincible, lit by the golden red light of the sleeping sun. And now...now she was there, a bundle of warmth against him. The feeling was most peculiar, for someone as touch starved as him. He couldn’t remember the last time he held onto another human being. Even like this, it felt oddly comforting. You have no right to entertain such thoughts, the voices screeched in his ears. He clenched his jaw. They were right, of course. He was a monster without a future. His sole purpose of existence was to appease the dead. He had no right to dream of a normal life. It was too late for him. He lived only to serve them.
And yet. Here she was, in his arms. Not the circumstances he could ever wish for, but very real nonetheless. His dear beloved professor, an unexpected glimmer of light in his short grim life. Since the first moment he laid eyes on her he had felt an inescapable attraction. He could recall with perfect clarity how she came to their aid that day they were running after Claude. When they were almost overwhelmed by the bandits, she showed up and effortlessly defeated their enemies. That day, Edelgard was rescued from what seemed certain death. In the moments that followed, he hadn’t seen Edelgard so flustered as he had then. Mesmerized by Byleth’s actions, he had blurted out a request for her to come back to the kingdom with him. He had meant every word.
Later, he was shocked with himself. After the momentary spell was broken, he had evaluated his actions and those of Byleth. When she was assigned as the new professor to his class, he couldn’t believe it. He watched her carefully and helplessly during their class battles. He saw how firm and calculating she was in battle. Oh, how he mistook her mere professionalism for a flaw. How he thought her cold and uncaring, when in truth he projected his own self loathing and battle frenzy on her. Until they talked it out. And since then… It all cleared up. Well he couldn't help it. Who could? Students and monastery personnel alike swooned at her sight. From whispers and stolen looks from Edelgard, to crude remarks from Sylvain, everyone seemed to be under the professor's spell.
At first, he couldn't believe his feelings. But there was no point denying it. Every time he saw her, his heart beat faster, every time she addressed him his heart skipped a beat. He stayed as composed as he could in their meetings. Years of royal practice did pay off. And he had no right to dream anyway. How dare you think you deserve love, when our bones rattle unavenged, the loathing voices inside him screamed. You have no right to enjoy things while we lie here to rot. And he agreed with them. No rest for a wicked creature like him, he thought. And yet… A part of him couldn't help but yearn and dream of being by her side. But that was all. Only a dream. Selfishly, he clung her tightly to his chest. She didn’t stir.
The stone gates of Garreg Mach appeared before him. It was night by now. The guards at the gates gasped as they saw him arriving with the professor in his arms. They swiftly opened the gates. Dimitri walked through the now empty market and surely enough from the darkness of the empty stalls, a tall dark figure emerged. Dedue. “Is the professor harmed? I will get Mercedes immediately” Dedue gasped. Before Dimitri could protest, Dedue took off. He decided to take the long way to the dorms, by the water. He didn't want any extra attention on Byleth. If he could especially avoid Rhea and Seteth, all the better. There was something primal about how Rhea looked at Byleth, an odd kind of hunger sparkled in her eyes. He wasn't sure what exactly it was, but it unnerved him. He stole a glance at the sky, filled with bright stars. It was freezing. He felt Byleth shudder and murmur in his arms. She clenched her arms tightly around him. The sudden act made him gasp and blush deeply. For crying out loud, the voices screamed, stop acting like an infatuated child. Pull yourself together.
He arrived at her doorstep a few moments later. Dedue was already there with Mercedes, a candelabra in her hand. In the dim candle light, she looked exhausted, but her eyes filled with worry and sorrow the moment she saw the professor. The door wasn't locked and Dedue pushed it open carefully, to let them in. The room was pitch dark, but Dimitri knew where to go. He had been here a few times before, to discuss class business with the professor. He carefully walked towards the bed and silently lay Byleth down on the cold bedding.
Mercedes rushed to his side. She examined the professor from head to toe. Her hand rested on Byleth’s forehead. “There seems to be no physical damage, but she has a fever. It must be from all the exhaustion”, she sighed. Magic blue light brightened the room, as Mercedes cast a restoration spell. “This should help her sleep peacefully. Ah, let me help you with the armor Dimitri’’.
The armor? Right. The armor. It dawned on his fatigued mind that Byleth can't exactly sleep with her armor on. He lifted her upper body carefully and Mercedes deftly removed the cape, pauldrons and cuirass. She then moved to her long boots and poleyn. The professor stirred, but didn't wake. “Oh, there’s still the gauntlets” gasped Mercedes. “It's all alright, I can remove them ” Dimitri said softly. He gently took her hands and one by one, he carefully removed the blood stained gauntlets. He was startled at his own careful and gentle manner, as fine movements he usually struggled with. But this was for Byleth...
He took a moment to look at her. He couldn't leave her like this. He leaned forward and placed some more pillows around her head. Then he reached for the folded blanket at her feet and gently covered her with it. This was better. He turned to leave, when suddenly a hand shot in his gauntlet. Startled, he looked down, as Byleth’s hand tightly gripped his. “Dimitri…’’ she mumbled. Heat built in his cheeks as he looked at her in disbelief. She was still fast asleep. And then a realisation hit him like a hammer. What if… What if she woke up in the middle of the night in this cold, dark room, all alone and confused as to where she is and how she got here? He certainly knew the feeling. Every other night, he woke up like that, haunted by nightmares of his past and future misgivings. What if she woke up alone after her terrible ordeal…?
He made a decision. No. He would be there. He turned to Dedue and Mercedes. “I…I cant leave yet”, he whispered. His gaze didn’t leave Byleth’s serene sleeping expression. “She needs someone to be here for her when she wakes up. I..I will wait.” he stammered. Dedue smiled and looked at Mercedes, who smiled back at him knowingly. “I.. The professor…” Dimitri's voice trailed further. Mercedes smiled kindly. “It's alright, Dimitri. We will be right next doors if you need anything”. Dedue nodded reassuringly and before Dimitri could protest, he moved the desk chair by the bed. ‘’You really didn’t have to, Dedue” Dimitri thanked him with a wan smile. Without letting go of Byleth’s hand he sat down quietly.
His body felt sore by the battle and carrying Byleth to the monastery. Even with his superhuman strength, that was not exactly comfortable. He certainly appreciated sitting down. Dedue and Mercedes bid him good night and walked out. Soundlessly, they closed the door. He sighed and looked at his professor. She was holding onto his hand tightly. Despite the gauntlet her weight on his hand felt comforting. Her hair, caressing her forehead, had an otherworldly shine to it. Like… Like the goddess herself. Yes. He felt oddly at peace. His eyelids felt heavy. For the first time in a really long time, he let go and drifted to sleep effortlessly.