Chapter Text
Hyakki? more like lgbt
11.18 AM
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miki : [Sent an image!]
miki : guys he’s lwk cute
sano : He looks like he’s gonna pass out and drown in a puddle of his own sweat.
fuji : why did u take a pic of some rando
miki : bc he’s cute n on our school campus??
miki : he cld literally be a new student!
mame : Oh hey! That’s the transfer student!
mame : I got his number :3
mame : I think his name is Seimei!
fuji : the transfer’s a wimpy looking kid?
miki : WAIT, WHAT?? OMG, HE’S IN MY CLASS. HE JUST CAME IN.
hatanaka : he’s inteoduing himself rn, he’s like tweaking out n shit, like mad sweating type shit
miki : lay off the man! he’s trying his best 😭😭
miki : and he looks like an abandoned puppy, super cute 🤭
hijita : wiat y would he hust join in during lunch..
hijita : and miki in love is.. uhm. anyways!
sano : I agree, Miki has questionable taste.
sano : I would like to ask though, do u keep adding ‘shit’?
hijita : constipated or sum
hatanaka : WTF I AIN’ CONSIPATED YA MUD BOY
miki : *constipated
hatanaka : rintarou..? yo?? my bro?? yk what i meant :((
miki : Do not use that fucking emoticon on me.
hijita : divorce arc hahaha
miki : he has a girlfriend.
hatanaka : i have a gf.
mame : Anyways, I’m gonna add the newbie to this chat so just don't scare him away..
miki : WAIT I NEED TO DELETE MY MESSAGES.
mame
: Okay, just don’t weird him out with whatever later!
(Mame has added 1 member to this chat!)
11.26 AM
mame : Welcome to the group!!
hijita : wassup
hatanaka : hey new guyy
miki : Hello, I hope our school’s first impression on you is good.
fuji : heya
kurahashi : hello :D
toubyou : HEYY WELCOME!!
nyuudou : hello!
kuniko : Hello!
hatanaka : rintarou-kun, ur acting weird as shit rn
miki : My dear friend, have you hit your head? I have always been like this and ‘this’ is basic decency.
hatanaka : man what drugs r u on, we didnt even get our weeklies yet 💀
haruaki : H-hello everyone…!
hijita: .
hijita : LMFAO HE JUST STUTTERED OVE RTEXT OMD IC ANT IM FGIHFAWJEKNFGV
mame : Don’t bully him, he’s new!!
miki : I agree with Mame. Hijita, behave yourself.
hijita : he’s stuttering over TEXT??
sano : Got a problem with it?
hijita
: No Sir.
sano
: Good.
sano
: But it is weird, kinda cringe too.
hijita
: .
mame
:
@haruaki
This group chat includes all the Hyakki people on my contacts :D
haruaki
: That’s a lot of people! (╥﹏╥)
mame
: Hehe! Anyhow, can everyone please share their name, class and year?
mame : @everyone
sano : I’m Sano Mikoto from Class 1, Year 2. My best friend is Mame.
mame : Aww, bestie Sano-kun 🥺
mame : I’m Maizuka Mamekichi, Class 1 Year 2 and Sano’s bff :DD
sano : I’m glad you’re my best friend, Mame.
hijita : im hjiita koutarou from class 2 year 2 heh
sano
: I was having a conversation with Mame.
hijita
: Sorry Sir.
mame : Me too Sano-kun hehe :DD
miki : Delighted to make your acquaintance, I’m Miki Rintarou from Class 1, Year 2.
miki : I hope we’ll get along well.
hatanaka : ijbol 💀
miki : What’s wrong, my dearest friend?
hatanaka : ignoring him, im hanatika isunan class 1 yr 2 n im friends with guy above
miki : He means ‘Hatanaka Izuna’, he has problems spelling.
hatanaka : 🙄
fuji : fuji touya class 1 year 3 or like junior year
kurahashi : i’m kurahashi yuuta from class 3 and i’m a junior :D
toubyou : TOUBYOU YAMATO AND YUUTAS BEST BUDDY HAHAA
kurahashi : we’re only best buddies?
toubyou : HUH ARE WE NOT??!!
beniko : arent u guys dating or smth..
toubyou : WE ARE???
kurahashi : ..
hijita : aijt no way this gayass snake dont even know he has a bf
kurahashi : yamato, we went on a date just yesterday at the theme park..
toubyou : THAT WAS A DATE? I THOUGHT IT WAS BRO-BONDING 😭😭
hijita : and i still cant pull.. the world is truly unfair
beniko : u dont pull bc all u do is talk abt are ur perverted fantasies
beniko : plus u literally give advice to THE ogata twins, the school’s BIGGEST prevs.
fuji : yea i heard they got caught by one of the student council members n had their phones confiscated.
mame : They were reading an erotica comic!
beniko : see, ur like the problem here and no one else. digging ur own grave smh
nyuudou : if we’re all dogpilling on hijita…
nyuudou : i saw him trying to peep under a senior’s skirt while she was walking up the stairs.
fuji : wow
nyuudou : yep.
mame : Hijitan..
tamao : opened chat to ts.. what the gyatt chat!
kuniko : Oh!
renjou : thats revolting. remind me to pummel hijita to the ground the next time i see him.
mujina : what the heck dude
kashima : remind me why do i know you again?
awayama : i hate this place
miki : My goodness gracious!
hatanaka : what the hell did u jst say.
sano : …
hijita : GET OFF MY ASS WTF LIKE U WOULDNT EITHER??
hijita : gotta seize the opportunity ykwim heh
hijita : BUT IM NOT THE ONLY PERV EITHER WAY
beniko : im ashamed but honestly thats brave af
hijita : HAHAA I KNOW RIGHT LIKE I WAS SO CLOSE TO SEEING IT BUT THEN NYEIUR23ND1!(@
nyuudou : what happened to hijita??
beniko : oh sano just like ran here and punched him across the cafeteria
beniko : im sure he’s fine tho, mame’s just clinging onto sano and video-ing it
beniko : but like why didnt u punch him this time
nyuudou : i punched him when i saw him do it, that’s why!
nyuudou : but seeing how unapologetic he is.. i think sano might need some backup :)
haruaki : I wanna go back home Σ(°△°|||)︴
—
“HELP ME, BENIKO!!” Beniko dug her ear and continued scrolling through social media as Hijita was frantically running away from Sano and his newest pursuer, Nyuudou. Another day, another antic-filled way to settle things. A notification banner appeared, a message from the transfer student. What was his name again? Abe no Seimei..? What a coward for someone with such a grand name. He didn’t seem like the type to be able to survive in such a school.
“Beniko-chan!!” Mame popped up beside her, seemingly satisfied with the blackmail he had captured. He peeped over at Beniko’s feed, pointing at the group chat. Messages stopped flowing in after the transfer’s message, the rest of the chat forgetting to introduce themselves or seeking another, better opportunity to, given the current chaotic situation.
“Oh, the new guy is like an insanely cowardly person, right?” She tapped into his profile, an image of a sailor uniform appeared as his picture. Beniko made a face, she didn’t know what kind of face she made but she knew it was at least partially one of disgust.
“I think he just needs more encouraging!”
“You really think so, Mame? He seems like a wet blanket to me.” Clicking off, she scrolled through the messages, counting the number of times he had spoken since being added.
Mame gives her a cheeky grin, causing Beniko to scoff in amusement. They watch Hijita get punched and German Suplexed by Sano and Nyuudou, his cries ringing out across the cafeteria. The rest of the students at the cafeteria had dispersed the moment they saw Sano bolting towards Hijita, knowing and fearing the worst. The cafeteria was filled with sounds of Hijita’s blood curdling screams, the hard punches of his assaulters and a splash of water here and there. The two assualters didn’t say much, their punches being their only way of expressing themselves.
A few minutes passed, Sano and Nyuudou still going at it as Hijita’s screams died down by the second. His throat getting hoarse and his eyes having shed enough tears. If these characters weren’t from a gag manga, Hijita would be considered dead and never to return. Luckily, it is a gag manga and Hijita still lives, albeit suffering, a lot. Beniko and Mame continued watching, the zashiki-warashi resting her head on her palm to watch their shenanigans in a more comfortable manner and the mame-danuki leaning on her shoulder.
Beniko opened her mouth first, “Should we stop them?”
“Do you really wanna?” Mame replied, his feet dangling off the bench, swaying back and forth. Beniko shrugged as she checked her phone, she had to admit that this was a sight to see. However, she could only sigh as she got up.
“Lunch’s almost over.”
“Already?!” Mame jumped off the bench, following Beniko to the unfortunate pile of kicked-up mud. Sano and Nyuudou looked at the two new arrivals and nodded their heads in understanding. Mame jumped into Sano’s arms, Beniko gathered the reduced-to-watery-mud Hijita in an empty bottle, screwing it tightly shut. Hijita banged the walls of his new confinement chamber, begging to be let out. Nyuudou offered to hold the bottle for the time being and promised to pass it back before they headed into class. Hijita promptly shut up.
—
Haruaki clutched tightly onto the hem of his uniform, sweat dripping down his face, his eyebrows tightly knitted together. His knuckles turned white as he grasped onto the fabric of his shirt, trying to keep his thoughts at bay. He had just embarrassed himself again with another horrible introduction. He always does this, he always messes up. He feels sick, nauseous and pathetic.
It was only his first day. He had to try to stay this time. He already ran out of the previous school thirty minutes after introducing himself. He had holed up at home for a year afterwards, too scared to get outside. His mom tried to get him to come out but he insisted on staying in. Now, he was at this youkai school as a special student, selected among the countless others, and he was still messing up. He missed his brother. His brother was always there to comfort him, to give him support, to encourage him! His brother was also always there clean up his messes, to fight his bullies for him, to protect him. Ah, how he hated it. He hated being a burden, he hated not being able to do anything by himself. He hated being a coward, he hated how he towered over everyone else, he hated himself. Yet he couldn’t change, yet he still clung onto this self of his, holding onto this disgustly weak self like a lifeline, unable to let go despite himself.
His vision was getting blurry again, his nails digging into his skin, he was getting swept up in his thoughts again. Again and again, every single sickening mistake he makes is always repeated, he always does this, he never learns. Despite everything he has tried, despite being happy all the time, despite pretending that he wasn’t affected by anything, despite crying like a fool to entertain others in his moments of sorrow, just to ease their worries. Everything always goes horribly wrong like the universe decided to toss him aside and leave him for dead .
He should be happy that the youkai students didn’t openly laugh at him like the ones before did. He was a straight A student, he looked alright, he has a good family environment and a part-time job at his family’s shrine. He should be happy. He has a bright future ahead of him, he is able to get his dream job with his current grades. He should be happy. So why isn’t he? Why does he always suffer? Why couldn’t he get it together? Why is everything always all over the place? Why-
“Hey, you okay?”
“Ah, I’m fine. Just nervous.” He got caught spiralling, how embarrassing. Brush it off, it’s alright, just pretend to be fine again. Haruaki put a smile on his face as he looked up at the owner of the voice. It was the sophomore representative, Maizuka Mamekichi or ‘Mame’, he seems nice and friendly.
“It’s free period right now, Odawara-sensei just left!” Haruaki looked over to the blackboard, the words ‘Free Period’ written messily in chalk, ‘byebye’ added below it in a smaller writing. He completely missed it, all because he was too caught up in his head.
“We can go around campus if you want! I know the prez already walked you through it once but I can give you the juicy secrets while we’re at it!” Mame winked, ready to head out as he grabbed onto Sano’s sleeve. Haruaki hadn’t noticed the blond boy standing next to his desk, Sano staring down at him. His expression unreadable, probably one of indifference but to Haruaki, it looked akin to disgust or irritation. Both are pretty bad.
Haruaki nodded, grabbing his wallet and followed Mame and Sano out of the classroom. Just as he closed the door behind him, he could hear the class start to buzz with chatter. They were probably talking about him, he slipped his wallet into his pocket, clenching his fist around it.
Mame led the way, clinging onto Sano’s back as he directed Haruaki’s attention towards the inner campus of the school. “Our school has six stories and I think this building was constructed around 10 years back?” He scrunched his eyebrows, thinking before shrugging, “Anyways, as you can see, we’re on the second floor…” Haruaki nodded as the tanuki continued to give him a lesson on the school’s structure and past events that occurred on the different levels.
He tapped Sano’s shoulder, the yakubyougami turned to face Haruaki. “Did you know that Sano’s one of the school’s top five hotties? They actually run a poll every term!” Mame pulled out his phone and tapped on the screen a bit before showing the display to Haruaki. There were a total of 1080 votes, the pictures of different students attached in the post below the poll. Whoever hosted this poll already has a form for others to recommend students to be included, they really thought this out.
“I have a question.” Haruaki pointed at Mame’s phone, earning a brief scornful look from Sano. “Who runs this poll?” Mame tapped his chin, pondering this question before shaking his head, “No clue, whoever it is, they’re really good at keeping it a secret!”
Haruaki slowly nodded, processing all this information. The school was quite big and seemed easy to get lost in. This was a huge hurdle for him, knowing how horrible his directional skills were.
“Seimei-kun!” Mame called after him, the duo had already progressed far ahead of him, making full use of this free period to give him a full tour of the school, down to its every nook and cranny.
“Uh, huh? Are you talking about me?” Haruaki looked around, confused.
“Yep!” Sano jogged back to Haruaki, holding Mame’s legs in place as Mame sat on his shoulders. “That’s your name, right?” Mame asked as he slowly approached Haruaki, looming above him.
“Uhm, it’s actually Haruaki…”
“Oh,” Mame turned a shade redder as he lowered his voice, “I have it saved as Seimei-kun because all the Prez did was send me your number and your picture, he said you were the transfer and didn’t even give me a name,” he pulled out his chat with the student council president, showing it to Haruaki, “I only had your own display name¹ to go off on..” he trailed off, sheepishly grinning when he realised that he could have just asked Haruaki for his name. Mame fell into silence for a moment before his eyes opened wide like something had just clicked for him.
“But, you don’t really mind do you?” he leaned over Sano’s hair, a pleading look on his face.
“I don’t mind at all!” Haruaki frantically shook his head, closing his eyes, sensing Sano’s death glare on him. Mame giggled and the three of them continued on with the tour of the school.
—
“I don’t get what you see in him.” The kamaitachi spoke, flicking Miki on the forehead. His friend’s newest crush had just left the classroom with Sano and Mame, presumably on a walk around campus. He seemed nervous, he was just hunched over and looked like he was in pain after all. Miki was just staring at the door with the most love-struck look he had ever seen. It grossed him out to see his normally flirty and easygoing friend so seriously infatuated with this new student.
“HEY, that hurts!” Miki retorted, massaging the afflicted spot and glaring at Hatanaka. “Anyways, you wouldn’t get it.” The oni continued, tutting and punching Hatanaka in the arm. Hatanaka winced in pain, his turn to massage the bruised area. Miki rested his chin on the palms of his hands, sighing deeply. Hatanaka rolled his eyes, a smile growing on his face. While it was weird to see his friend like this, it was nice to have a truly happy Rintarou for once.
—
Hyakki? more like lgbt
12.13 PM
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ogoso : I’m late to the welcome party but welcome to the group, transfer!
kurai : yes hello transfer student.
ogoso : Ah wait, I forgot to add my class and name...
ogoso : I’m Ogoso Suguru from Class 1, Year 3! Kurai’s in the same class as me ^^
kurai : 👍
medusa : why should i listen to some raccoon and introduce myself?
medusa : especially to some random nobody that’s just fresh prey.
hiro : lets just get it over with! kurai did his anyways
medusa : the ogoso boy did it for him.
hiro : same difference dusa 🥱
medusa : fine. i’m medusa from class 1, year 3.
hiro : im hiro from class 2 and the same year as dusa 😙
maeda : Woah, that's a lot of messages but i’m Maeda Yosutomi from Class 4 Year 3!
maeda : Welcome to the gang, transfer!
sakai : welcome transfer, im sakai from class 2 year 3.
kai : rasetsu kai, 3-2
fuji : u guys r super late to the welcome party lols
medusa : not everyone has free periods like you, ice boy.
fuji : i sure wonder why
medusa :
fuji : oh didnt know i could shut u up this way
ogoso : Oh dear
fuji : relax su, we’re not gonna fight, not this time anyways
medusa : you’re sharp with your words but quite weak when it comes to physical attacks.
fuji : psychological warfare seems quite entertaining to me, don’t u agree?
fuji : but maybe it’s cs u can’t keep up with it lol
medusa : you’re lucky we can’t use our powers in school. i’d have stoned you by now.
fuji : i sure am lucky then.
medusa : ugh i hate you.
—
the gays are fighting (always)
3.36 PM
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ashiya : Did the new transfer student get settled in well?
ranmaru : who..??
byakko : Haruaki Abe, you dimwitted donkey. We looked at his file yesterday.
ranmaru : hey im nota dimwit! i legit hv btr grades than like everyone here hahaa
byakko : Fuck you.
ashiya : Ranmaru. Byakko.
byakko : Do not ‘Byakko.’ me, you insolent fraud.
ranmaru : sheesh.. looks like the kitty’s angryyy!!
ranmaru : but like yea i think so?? check the chat that the tanuki made or somethin..
ashiya : I muted the chat. It was too noisy.
ranmaru : LOL REAL but anyways, he got the transfer’s number and like the transfer barely said a word
ashiya : I suppose I will have to check in with him tomorrow morning.
ranmaru : u do that acchan!!
ashiya : You will be coming with me. 7 o’clock in the morning, on the dot, in this room.
ranmaru : WHAAATTT. ACCHAN PLEASEE YOU KNOW I DONT WAKE UP THAT EARLY!!
ashiya : As Vice-President of the Student Council, this is part of your responsibilities.
ashiya : Plus, school starts at 7.30.
ranmaru : FIRST OF ALL, IT LITERALLY ISNT
ranmaru : SECONDLY, I WAKE UP AT 7.25!!!
ranmaru : AND LASTLY, U JUST HATE ME 😭😭😭
byakko : Stop whining, you infuriating bird.
ranmaru : wait like i jst noticed this but y do u hv a format for ur insults
ranmaru : like, idw be mean n stuff but like
ranmaru : opposes action, you adjective noun.
byakko : Lies, you bumbling buffoon.
ranmaru : u jst did it again, literally not helping ur case 💀
byakko : Fuck.