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It happened on one of those rare days.
One of those days when the weather was nice and the moods were lively, when the Generation of Miracles could set aside their differences outside of their love of basketball and join together to enjoy their lunch period as a group instead of in their respective classrooms. It was a proposal suggested by their captain, who thought it would be a good opportunity for team-bonding, a sentiment eventually agreed upon by the others, albeit with some reluctance. Kuroko even took the rare initiative to suggest a pleasant spot he knew where they could enjoy the first breaths of summer in the air.
“Kuro-chin, you’re always full of surprises, huh?” Murasakibara commented, mouth stuffed with potato chips. “I didn’t even know students were allowed up here.” They all sat together on the rooftop of the school, taking in the fresh air that accompanied their lunches and the warmth of the sunlight against their skin.
“Don’t speak with your mouth full,” Midorima chided, pushing his glasses up his nose. “But yes… this area of the school is typically off limits to the student body. I’m sure you’re already aware of this, Kuroko?” He gave Kuroko a look, eyes narrowing.
“It should be fine as long as we clean up after ourselves,” Akashi cut in before Kuroko had a chance to respond. “We aren’t causing a disruption, anyway.”
“Yeah, lighten up, Midorimacchi!” Kise exclaimed, clapping his teammate on the back, perhaps a little too roughly. “I’ve always wanted to do something like this with my friends! I mean, you see it all the time in manga and stuff, right?”
Midorima made an irritated click with his tongue. “Not everything is about manga, for God's sake.” As he spoke, he looked particularly disgruntled as the wind blew around while he tried to eat from his lunchbox. “There’s nothing appealing about eating on the rooftop anyway — we have to sit on the ground, and the wind keeps blowing dust on my food.”
“You say that, but you still followed us up here, didn’t you?” Aomine pointed out, sprawled out on the floor next to them. While an embarrassed Midorima attempted to sputter out a retort, he let out a massive yawn and stretched out to make himself more comfortable. “Anyways, this really is a great spot, Tetsu. I feel like I could fall asleep right now. Maybe I’ll come back some other time.”
“You really shouldn’t be sleeping during school, Aomine-kun,” Kuroko said with no sign of actually scolding his friend.
“By the way, Kurokocchi, how did you know we could get up here in the first place?” Kise asked, leaning in too close into Kuroko’s personal space for his liking. “Do you come here that often?”
He nodded. “Yes. I happened across this spot while wandering around one day. The view up here is really nice, so I like to visit here whenever I want to be alone. For some reason, none of the staff members have ever tried to stop me.”
“Kurokocchi…”
“Eh? So that means this place is special to you, right? And you still showed it to us?” Momoi chimed in, unable to hide the glee on her face.
“Of course,” Kuroko replied, resulting in a squealing Momoi who pulled him into an overbearing hug (“Tetsu-kun!”). “You all mean a lot to me, too, after all.”
“Kuro-chin… you’re way too nice.” Murasakibara pulled out a packet of nerunerunerune candy from his bag. “Here, have one.”
“Thank you, Murasakibara-kun.” He took the candy and set it aside before returning to the conversation.
“Honestly, is that all you brought for lunch? Junk food?” said Midorima, using his chopsticks to point at Mursakibara’s pile of chips, candies, and cookies he had stuffed in his school bag. “An athlete should be treating his body like a temple.”
“Eh? Well, I usually eat what they serve in the cafeteria, but when Aka-chin said he wanted us to eat together today, I was too lazy to pack a bento,” Murasakibara reasoned, tearing open another umaibo.
“Then buy a sandwich or something from the store, man,” said Aomine, still lying on his back.
“But I spent all my allowance on snacks…”
Something hit Murasakibara in the face: an embroidered buckwheat roll pillow — in other words, Oha Asa’s lucky item of the day. Midorima’s hand was still stretched out from throwing as he shot a glare in Muraskibara’s direction.
“Tch, you junkie.”
Murasakibara rubbed his face. “Ouch, Mido-chin… even if it was a pillow, wasn’t that a little much? Buckwheat pillows can really hurt when you throw them at full force.”
“Catch it next time, then.”
“Come on now, let’s settle down,” Akashi said, stepping in before things escalated. “Midorima is just showing some concern on your behalf (Midorima huffed at this statement). But he does have a point, Murasakibara. Those snacks aren’t very filling. You should take better care of your health so you’re in peak form at all times.”
“Eh? You too, Aka-chin? ” Murasakibara whined. “Mido-chin already nags me too much about my diet, I don’t need you to start.”
Akashi considered something for a few moments. “There’s still some time left before our lunch period ends… I’m sure there must be a couple of items left at the school store. How about I treat you to an onigiri or something so that you aren’t just running on junk food for the rest of the day? Since I’m the one who brought us out here.”
“Mm… I’m pretty content with my snacks, though. But if Aka-chin is insisting… just nothing with carrots, okay?”
“Understood,” Akashi said, already standing up and heading to the door, wallet in hand. “In that case, I’ll be right back.”
He left the rooftop, and the gang continued on with their lunch, conversing freely while awaiting their leader’s return. Things were going smoothly until Murasakibara went to take a sip of his Sprite, only to find the bottle empty.
“Ah… I already drank it all,” he complained, trying to shake the last remaining droplets onto his tongue. “But my throat is so dry from eating all those potato chips. What do I do?”
“That’s what you get for only eating junk with high-sodium content,” said Midorima haughtily. “You should take a page out of my book. It always helps to come prepa—”
He stopped mid-sentence while reaching out for his lucky item, only to come out empty-handed. Frantically, he whipped his head around to see where it went. “Huh? Where — Aomine!”
Midorima’s loud outburst seemed to have no effect on Aomine, who had just been spotted by Midorima for using his pillow while lying out in the sun. “Hand that back immediately!” he sputtered, irked.
“Huh? Come on, Midorima, my neck’s sore,” Aomine complained. “Isn’t this what a pillow is meant to be used for? Not for some superstitious nonsense.”
“It’s not nonsense! My lucky item isn’t meant for your comfort!” Midorima berated. “You can’t even begin to fathom half of the importance Oha Asa’s lucky items stand for in the matter of facing fate! You heathen!”
He pulls the pillow out from underneath Aomine, sending his head crashing onto the ground.
“Hey— Ow, that hurt you, bastard!” shouted Aomine, rubbing the back of his head. “I was just borrowing it for a moment!”
“Doesn’t matter! Keep your dirty hands off my possessions!”
“Dirty? Hey, now, that’s going too far!”
“Not when I know for a fact that you don’t always wash your hands in the bathroom!”
“That’s filthy, Aomine-kun,” Kuroko agreed. “You should really clean your hands.”
Aomine flushed in embarrassment. “That’s — I clean my hands! It’s just that sometimes I forget…”
“I am surrounded by children.” Midorima scoffed and rolled his eyes. “And who do you think you’re calling? ” he snapped at Murasakibara, who had pulled out his phone to make a call. Aomine continued to grumble to himself about being falsely accused of uncleanliness.
“Huh? Aka-chin,” Murasakibara answered. “I’m going to ask if he can pick up some cola for me while he’s down at the store.”
“Don’t bother him over something frivolous like that! He’s already gone down there for your sake.” But Murasakibara was already pressing the call button against Midorima’s protests, and the phone began to ring. Seconds later, they could hear a muffled buzzing sound nearby.
“Hey, look.” Kise pointed at the spot where Akashi had been sitting before. It appeared he had left behind both his bento and his —
“Looks like Akashicchi left his phone behind. That’s unlike him.”
“Man, really? I was really craving some cola, though,” Murasakibara grumbled.
“Go buy your own then,” Midorima huffed. “There’s a vending machine just downstairs.”
“Murasakibara-kun, would you like some of my water?” offered Kuroko, holding out the bottle.
“Eh? Water doesn’t taste as good though…” Murasakibara took it, nonetheless, setting his phone aside as it continued to ring. “Thanks, I guess, Kuro-chin.” He took a long sip.
“What? No fair! Why do you get to have an indirect kiss with Kuroko?” said Kise. At the same time, Momoi reached over for Akashi’s phone to shut it off.
“Hm? Did you want some too, Kise-chin?” said Murasakibara, holding it out for Kise. “Here.”
“Not with you! That bottle’s tainted with your lips now!” he whined.
“Guys… look at this,” Momoi suddenly interjected, staring at the screen of Akashi’s phone. The corners of her mouth were slightly upturned as she tried to conceal an amused smile.
Curious, the rest of the group gathered around to see what had caught her attention. But nothing could have prepared them for what they were about to discover.
On Akashi’s phone, which was still buzzing from Murasakibara’s call, was the call screen from which they could see the saved contact Akashi had for Murasakibara’s number:
(Cookie Monster)
A hush fell over the group as the phone rang.
Kise was the first to speak after a few moments of stunned silence. “Eh? Is this for real? That’s so out-of-character for Akashicchi.”
“Are we even sure this is his phone? Maybe it was misplaced!” Aomine said, bewildered at this new discovery of their team captain.
“I mean, it was Murasakibara-kun who was calling, so it’s probably his,” Kuroko pointed out.
“But Cookie Monster? Cookie Monster? I can’t even imagine those words coming out of Akashi’s mouth!”
“That’s what I’m wondering,” said Murasakibara. “What do you think, Kuro-chin? Why am I a cookie monster?”
“Well…”
“Is it not obvious?” Midorima scowled and pointed at the umaibo Murasakibara was holding in his hands. “How many does that make today?”
“Hm, should I have been keeping count?”
“Why you —”
“But honestly,” Momoi said, interrupting the two. She gave the phone screen a closer look. “What a surprisingly cute side to Akashi-san. He’s always so formal, too.”
Suddenly, a certain glint entered her eye. “Hey, I have an idea!” She scurried over to Aomine’s side and began digging through his pockets.
“What — Satsuki! Hey! ” he protested as she rummaged through his clothes. “Back off!”
“Oh, come on, I want to see what name Akashi-san’s saved you under!”
“Watch your hands!”
But before he could push her away, Momoi had already found what she was looking for. Flipping Aomine’s phone open, she quickly dialed Akashi’s number, and a few moments later, the other phone began to ring. They all gathered around to see:
(Aho-mine)
…
“Oi… ” Aomine said to no one in particular, his facial expression darkening. “What is this bullshit? ”
There was the sound of a stifled snort, which was then followed by a series of muffled snickering. Soon enough, Kise burst out laughing, unable to contain it any longer.
“That’s hilarious! Aho-mine? Who knew that Akashicchi had such a sense of humor? I’m totally using that later.” Tears were in his eyes as Kise clutched his stomach from his laughing fit. The longer he laughed, the larger the vein in Aomine’s forehead popped out.
“Try it and see how that works out for you, bastard,” he said threateningly.
“Wow… Aka-chin can be pretty cold, huh?” Murakisabara commented, taking the phone to see for himself. “I guess this is what happens when you act difficult during practice, Mine-chin.”
“Shaddup! I don’t want to hear that from some cookie monster!”
“Aho-mine.”
“Cookie monster! ”
“Gosh, look at what Akashi-san has done.” Momoi sighed, watching the boys bicker. “He’s not even here, and yet they’re quarreling because of him.”
“Well, we are the ones looking at his phone without his permission,” Kuroko replied. “I doubt he ever expected us to find out about this.”
“And you! ” Aomine suddenly said, turning to Kise, who was still howling with laughter. “Stop laughing! Why don’t you call Akashi and see how it feels? Then we’ll see who’s laughing then!”
“Eh? Me?” Kise finally managed to calm down a bit at Aomine’s request. “I mean, I’ll try, but I don’t think I’ve done anything for Akashicchi to hold against me, so it’ll probably just be my name, right?”
As he pulled out his phone to call Akashi, everyone gathered around the other phone to see Kise’s saved contact.
The phone began to ring.
…
Nobody said anything for a few seconds. The lack of response caught Kise’s attention. “Guys? What are you waiting for? What does it say?” he asked, still holding his phone to his ear.
“Kise…”
“Hm? What?”
“... he didn’t save you as anything,” Momoi finally answered awkwardly.
“Huh? ”
“He didn’t save your number at all,” Midorima repeated without hesitation. “Look.” He held up the phone screen for Kise to see:
(090-###-###)
Everyone fell silent once again until the phone finally stopped ringing. Kise, in a fit of despair, found himself in the corner with his back turned to everyone and hugging his knees as a large cloud gloomed over his head.
“He—hey now Kise…” Aomine said cautiously, now seemingly over the fact that Kise had been laughing at his expense only moments before. “Don’t let it get to you, man, I’m sure Akashi didn’t mean any harm. Right, Satsuki?”
“Ri—right! I’m sure there’s an explanation behind why he doesn’t have your number saved,” Momoi reasoned, looking sheepish. “Like — uhm… like…” She fell silent, unable to come up with anything. Kise’s shoulders sagged even further.
“Congratulations, Kise-kun,” Kuroko chimed in all of a sudden. “It seems that you are so close to Akashi-kun that he did not even see the need to save your number as he already has it completely memorized.”
“Kurokocchi… ”
“Wait, no, Testsu. In what realm of possibility is that likely?”
“Hm? But it’s true that Akashi-kun has a great memory.”
“Yeah, but it’s not like he’d use it to do something like memorize Kise’s number,” Aomine said, exasperated, not realizing his words until he saw Kise becoming even sulkier. “I—I mean, that’s totally possible! What am I saying?”
Kise buried his face in his knees. “Just forget about it,” he whined, teary-eyed. “I guess I’m just not worth being remembered by our captain, huh? That’s what I get for being the last to join the regulars.”
“Wow, Kise-chin can be really sensitive, huh?” Murasakibara commented, opening another bag of chips.
Momoi, desperate to reconcile the situation, tried to move things along. “I know! Why don’t we see Midorin’s contact now? I bet that’ll be interesting to see!”
“Would it? Mido-chin is his vice-captain, I don’t think Aka-chin would put him down as anything silly,” Murasakibara said, popping a chip into his mouth.
“That’s true,” Kuroko agreed. “They’re pretty respectful of each other.”
“Naturally,” Midorima huffed, his arms crossed. “Akashi and I don’t have that sort of immature rapport.”
“But still, aren’t you curious?” Momoi pouted. “Come on, Midorin! Lighten up! You can’t be the only one who doesn’t do it.”
Midorima made a ‘tch’ sound as Momoi tugged at his sleeve. “Fine. If it’ll get you to get off my back.” He pulled out his phone and dialed:
(Nanodayo?)
Nanodayo…
Everyone thought the same thing. But before anyone could say anything, Midorima closed his phone with a foreboding ‘snap’.
“... I’ll kill him.”
“He’ll floor you in ten seconds flat,” Aomine deadpanned.
“Gee, Midorimacchi. You must be pissed!” exclaimed Kise, who had rejoined to group in a flash, evidently back to normal from his moping.
“Huh — hey! What happened to that pity-fest you were holding for yourself?” Aomine snapped. “Making me feel all bad for nothin’!”
“Oh, come on, this isn’t about me anymore! Think about poor Midorimacchi, betrayed by his own captain. Brings tears to my eyes.” Kise mimicked wiping his left eye, further irritating Midorima.
“Watch your mouth.”
“Hm? What was that Midorimacchi?” Kise said, looking towards him. “Do you need a hug? I get how you feel, why don’t we —” the rest of his sentence was cut off as he received a flying pillow to the face. “Ack! ”
“Nanodayo… nanodayo …” Murasakibara mumbled to himself. “You do say it a lot, Mido-chin. I bet it’s not even the first time someone has made fun of you for that.”
“Shut up. I’ll hear no more about this.” Midorima clenched his teeth and pushed his glasses back up his face. “This was a stupid idea in the first place…”
“Don’t be like that, Midorin,” Momoi insisted. “See, here, now I’ll try calling Akashi-san, too. I’m pretty curious to see myself, actually.”
“Won’t it just be something like big-boobed manager?” Aomine quipped behind her. In a split second, he was facedown on the ground with a bulging bump on his head and Momoi standing above him, still holding out her fist.
“Aomine-kun, you shouldn’t say something so crude about a girl. You’ll hurt her feelings,” Kuroko lightly chided.
“Tetsu-kun… ” Touched, Momoi dashed over to where he was sitting to snuggle up on his arm, squealing. “You’re so sweet!”
“Besides, Akashi-kun would never use that type of language.”
“Tetsu…”
“Okay! Time to call Akashi-san!” Momoi declared, flipping her phone open.
“Guys, shouldn’t he be coming back at any moment now?” Kise said hesitantly.
“Don’t worry, this will only take a second!”
Ring… ring…
(La Femme)
“Huh?” Momoi gawked at the screen like she couldn’t quite believe what she was reading.
“La — la femme?” Kise read aloud. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means ‘The Woman’ in French,” Midorima explained. “A little obvious, if you ask me.”
“Well, I know that much, Midorimacchi!” Kise complained. “What I meant was, what does Akashi mean by calling Momoi by that?”
“Well, she is a woman,” Murasakibara pointed out. “Isn’t she?”
“You have to ask?”
“French… Akashi-kun really is impressive, isn’t he?” said Kuroko, looking at Momoi, who was still clinging to his arm. “Right, Momoi-san?”
“I — I suppose…” Momoi said, looking uncertain with her eyebrows furrowed. “But I don’t know why… something about being called that seems off. It feels like I’m being insulted somehow.”
“Hm?”
Hey, don’t be like that, Momocchi. At least he saved your number.”
“Yeah, and at least he didn’t call you anything outright insulting,” Aomine grumbled, clearly still holding a grudge about ‘Aho-mine.’ “‘La Femme’ sounds like some fancy title.”
“It does sound pretty intense,” Murasakibara agreed. “Is it some sort of inside joke between you two?”
“We don’t really joke around like that…”
“Maybe it has to do with how he sees you,” Kise suggested. “The Woman… like you’re the only woman he takes notice of?”
“While Akashi does respect Momoi’s analytic abilities, I doubt that’s the case,” said Midorima. “He’s never mentioned her outside of a basketball setting, I believe.”
Momoi nodded her head in agreement. “Yeah, I don’t think it’s that either. I mean, I feel like the only time Akashi-san really pays attention to me is when—”
She stopped midsentence. Kuroko looked at her curiously. “When what, Momoi-san?”
“Um, never mind…” She squeezed Kuroko’s arm even tighter, pouting as the blush spread across her cheeks.
“Hey, Kurokocchi, you still haven’t called Akashicchi yet, right?” Kise exclaimed. “What are you waiting for? He’ll be back in any second!”
“Oh yeah, I wonder what kind of nickname Aka-chin would save you under.”
“Invisible man? Phantom? Super Saiyan?” Aomine guessed.
“Why Super Saiyan?” Kuroko asked, unaware. Everyone’s mind immediately went back to every morning of their training camps, where they were greeted by Kuroko’s atrocious bed-head, sticking out in every which direction.
“If you really don’t know, then it’s pointless to tell you.”
“Hurry up, Kurokocchi! I want to see what he’s saved you as,” Kise urged, looking over Kuroko’s shoulder while waiting for him to pull out his phone.
“Alright then…” He dialed.
Ring… ring...
(MINE)
Despite just being words on a screen, the sheer volume of the letters typed in bold capitals gave a clear enough impression of the intended sentiment behind them. The message was loud and clear for anybody to pick up on.
For the next few seconds, everyone was rendered speechless. Kuroko blinked, but his face remained expressionless. “My,” he said, setting his phone aside. “I certainly didn’t see that coming.”
“Wow, Kuro-chin. Aka-chin must really like you,” Murasakibara commented, licking the crumbs off his fingers. “None of the other contacts have been nearly as nice.”
“You call that nice?” Midorima said, disbelieving. “To me, it sounds like he sees Kuroko as some kind of a pet.”
“Must be nice being loved, Kurokocchi…” Kise was pouting. “All I ask is that he save my number…”
“At least he didn’t call you Aho-mine.” Aomine sounded dejected.
“Nanodayo…”
“Cookie monster…”
“I’m starting to understand why I’m just La Femme…” Momoi gave a sullen sigh.
“Um… wasn’t this supposed to be for fun? Why has the atmosphere become sombre?” But Kuroko's words seemingly went unheard as the group mulled over their newly found impressions of their captain. Suddenly, a hand appeared behind Kuroko to take Akashi’s phone from his hand.
“That’s what I’m wondering myself.”
Everyone’s heads swerved in the direction of the voice.
“Akashi-kun,” Kuroko said, looking up as Akashi loomed over him.
“Akashi!”
“Akashicchi!”
“Aka-chin…”
“You’re back!” Momoi said, getting to her feet. “We didn’t hear you arrive.”
“I’m not surprised, considering how you all seemed preoccupied.” Akashi tossed an onigiri in Muraskibara’s direction, who caught it with ease. “Here, Murasakibara. I’m afraid all they had left was salmon. I hope that’s alright.”
Murasakibara was already tearing it open and taking a bite. “That’s fine, thanks for going through the trouble.”
“Now…” Akashi turned back to the group, this time with a more sinister glint in his eye, even though his smile appeared cordial. “What’s this about my phone I’m hearing?”
Everyone froze in their spots.
“Uh! Well — so here’s the thing…”
“We can explain! It’s not what you think!”
“It’s all Murasakibaracchi’s fault! He’s the one who wanted cola!”
“Eh? Don’t pin this all on me.”
“To be clear, I had nothing to do with this. I was minding my own business until Momoi kept pestering me.”
“So unfair, Midorin! You were curious to see, too!”
Everyone kept trying to speak over one another while trying to explain the situation as Akashi stood before them all, watching it all unfold. The only one who seemed mildly unbothered was Kuroko, who was watching Akashi with an unreadable expression on his face.
“Say, Akashi…”
“Hm? What is it, Kuroko?” He turned to face him as the commotion continued around them.
“Do you really see me as yours?”
Akashi blinked in surprise, almost snapping out of the intimidating persona he was excluding just moments before. But he recovered quickly, the friendly smile returning to his face without faltering.
“Isn’t it obvious?”