Work Text:
Is Takeba imagining it, or does Fuuka keep blushing around him? No, she definitely keeps doing it. It was easy to mistake at first, because Fuuka is a bit awkward and goes red at the drop of a hat, but… she does it almost exclusively with Takeba. And he’s struggling to think of another reason for why a pretty girl keeps blushing when he appears.
Wait… pretty? He dwells on that thought for a while. Well, it’s true; from a totally aesthetic point of view, Fuuka is a pretty girl (even though some guys at school called her plain back before Takeba came out and he slapped them for it). And it’s not like Takeba has never found girls pretty before. He once had a crush on a girl when he was younger, but… but he was a girl too and he got worried about how people would react, so he squashed those thoughts down and ignored them. But if he truly needed to define himself… he supposes he’s bisexual. What’s amusing about the whole thing is now he’s a guy, his crushes on boys are the gay ones, and liking girls is now straight of him. The whole thing is confusing enough to make him laugh.
Now he lets himself think about it, Fuuka is cute. She’s sweet and kind and thoughtful, and Takeba loved helping Minato teach her to cook a few weeks ago. She’s incredible with tech, too. He still remembers when Fuuka fixed his CD player and made it better than it was before. She has an adorable smile too, one that can light up a room. Oh, and the way she fiddles with her hair and rocks herself on the balls on her feet when nobody is looking is so cute too.
Okay… now he actually thinks about this all… he might have a crush on Fuuka but has been subconsciously supressing it again. And he might have had this crush for a while. And he might be kind of in over his head and go bright red when he thinks about kissing her.
But here’s the thing. Only a month ago, Takeba was a girl. Well, he certainly thought he was one. And despite his best intentions, he doesn’t do a good job of passing for a guy. He just looks like a girl in boy clothes. Not masculine enough to ease his dysphoria. And as far as he’s aware, Fuuka is straight. So, would a straight girl truly like a guy who looks like a girl wearing his friend’s hand-me-down clothes?
Or is he just doing what he does best, and overthinking everything again?
---
Three days after this revelation, Takeba can’t think of what to do next. Sure, he’s finally realised how big a crush he has on Fuuka, but he still can’t work out if she actually has a crush on him back or if he’s just misunderstood everything. And his mind keeps wondering what would happen if he asked her out. Like, would she just kindly turn him down because she’s not into him, or would she be weird about it? She seems fine with him being a guy now, but… would that change if Takeba came onto her? Would it freak her out? Would she get homophobic even though Takeba isn’t a girl? So many things could go wrong, and he doesn’t know how to—
“Takeba-kun?”
As he takes his outdoor shoes out of his shoe locker, ignoring the rude note some asshole put in his locker (because despite the rest of SEES and most of the archery club sticking up for him, plenty of jerks still treat him like shit for being a guy), Fuuka’s voice snaps Takeba out of his spiralling thoughts.
He turns his head and looks at her. She holds her schoolbag in both hands, staring at him with a concerned expression on her face.
“Oh, hey, Fuuka.”
(Not long after Takeba came out, he wondered if he should address her differently, perhaps call her Yamagishi-san. But, like Aigis, Fuuka was insistent that Takeba could keep using the same name he’d always used.)
“Are you doing okay?” she asks. “You were frowning.” Fuuka’s gaze drifts to the screwed-up ball of paper gripped in Takeba’s fist. “Oh… I see.”
Of course, it wasn’t actually the note that had Takeba frowning to himself; to be honest, he just finds the notes boring at this point. But it’s easier for that to be the reason than for Takeba to explain what was going through his head. So, he says, “Just some jerks being jerks.”
Fuuka sighs. “You don’t deserve this, Takeba-kun.”
“I know,” he says, trying to smile like nothing is wrong. “I’m hoping to catch them in the act one day and punch them.”
Fuuka giggles. “You sound like Junpei-kun.”
Takeba raises an eyebrow. Before he came out, he would have probably flipped out at being compared to Junpei. But… Takeba’s feelings towards Junpei have softened a lot since then. He doesn’t really understand it, but being his true self makes him less grumpy around Junpei; Sanada-san, speaking from his own experience when he was a kid, speculated that Takeba might have been subconsciously jealous of Junpei and got needlessly aggressive towards him as a result, and there may be some truth to that. Either way, being compared to Junpei doesn’t set him off. Instead, he just chuckles and says in a playful tone, “Oh god, I really don’t want to be turning into Junpei.”
“Don’t worry,” Fuuka says. “You’re still the same Takeba-kun we all know and lo—” She cuts herself off at the last minute, a blush spreading across her face. The phase ‘we all know and love’ doesn’t really mean anything—it’s the sort of thing Junpei would sarcastically say about one of his teammates when joking around—but Takeba wonders if Fuuka’s odd behaviour has a reason behind it. A reason that makes his chest flutter beneath his binder. “I-I mean, you’re still you.”
As Takeba keeps thinking about her choice of words, he bends down to slip his outdoor shoes on. Part of him longs to ask Fuuka out, but his fears keep him quiet. Especially because he has never asked anyone on a date before (it was always the boys obsessed over him back then who asked Takeba on dates), and he still isn’t sure of the etiquette that a guy needs to follow to ask a girl out.
When he straightens up, he finds Fuuka looking a bit more composed. Smiling sweetly, Fuuka asks, “Would you like to walk back to the dorm together? Unless you’ve got other plans.”
“No, no plans here,” Takeba says. They have exams coming up, so no clubs are meeting, and he has no plans to meet up with anyone—mostly because the majority of his ‘friends’ want nothing to do with him anymore. Which, as far as Takeba is concerned, means they were never true friends to begin with.
And the way Fuuka beams at him makes Takeba’s stomach squirm. She’s got such a beautiful smile.
“That’s great!” she says, that smile seeming to light up the room.
After Takeba picks up his school bag, they walk down the front steps of the school and head home. Takeba notices a few people giving him funny looks, but he just glares at them. Very few people actually have the courage to come up and bully him, he’s noticed; most just stare at him from a distance. Cowards.
But he’s used to it. What concerns Takeba is how many people give Fuuka nasty looks. The thought of her being treated badly just for associating with him makes him want to scream.
He hoped Fuuka wouldn’t notice the attention, but she ducks her head and steps a little closer to Takeba, close enough that they could be mistaken for a couple walking together. She sighs, and whispers, “They’re all so cruel…”
“Yeah…” Takeba says, also sighing. “Are you sure you wanna be… seen with me?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m not… popular,” he says, well aware that his popularity plummeted the day he came into school dressed this way. “And, well… people are probably gonna treat you like this too if you spend too much time around me.” And Fuuka isn’t the most popular girl to begin with (Takeba heard a lot of gossip back when he looked different, aware various students think Fuuka is boring or plain or her tech-related hobbies aren’t ‘feminine enough’), so she probably can’t stand to lose the friends she has all because of Takeba.
“I know you mean well, Takeba-kun, but… I don’t care what those people think,” Fuuka says with surprising confidence. “I want to spend time with you. And I don’t care if unkind people have a problem with that.”
Takeba stares at her, willing his cheeks not to flush. “Thanks, Fuuka,” he eventually manages to say. “That… that means a lot.”
She smiles. “You’re very welcome, Takeba-kun.”
After a few minutes of walking in silence (a silence that, to his relief, doesn’t feel awkward), Fuuka looks at him and says, “Would you like to stop at the shrine? It’s nice to just sit and watch the world go by.”
Aware that Minato spends a lot of his time at the shrine for a variety of reasons, Takeba can see that being the case. And, well, he wouldn’t say no to spending more time with Fuuka. “Sure, that sounds nice.”
Once they reach the shrine, deserted except for an elderly woman praying, Fuuka leads Takeba over to a bench near the kids’ sandbox. Takeba sits beside her, close enough to make it obvious they’re here together (and close enough to reach across and hold hands, not that he’ll do that), but far enough so it isn’t awkward. And before Takeba can think of a conversation topic, Fuuka begins to speak.
“Takeba-kun, I asked you here with me because…” Fuuka trails off, twirling her thumbs in her lap. She seems to work herself up to continue, before she finally says, “Because I wanted to tell you something. I think… no, I know I have a crush on you.”
Takeba stares straight ahead, just letting those words sink in. All his thoughts about Fuuka’s potential attraction towards him turned out to be true. He should be ecstatic for his crush to like him back. And yet… those worries return. About her sexuality. About if she sees him as a boy. About how surely this must be a sick joke, because how can this really be happening to someone like him?
In the end, what he blurts out is, “But aren’t you straight?”
“Y-Yeah, I am,” Fuuka says, clearly startled by the question. “Why do you ask?”
Takeba holds back a sigh. He’s delighted to hear she likes him, but… but that nagging doubt won’t leave him alone. And, with nothing better to say, he lets himself voice those doubts. “I just can’t work out why a straight girl is interested in me.”
“Well, because… I don’t like girls that way. I’ve only ever had crushes on boys. And you’re a boy, Takeba-kun. So… That’s why I like you.”
“But I mean, look at me,” Takeba says, gesturing at his school uniform (still using Sanada-senpai’s old uniform from his second year, because new uniform is expensive and it’s been tailored to hide his curves really well), short height and very feminine face. He hates it, but he looks like a girl crossdressing as a boy, rather than the boy he truly is.
“I am looking at you,” Fuuka says. Her cheeks glow and she can’t quite meet Takeba’s eyes, but she radiates with surprising confidence as she says, “And I see a handsome boy w-who’s being too hard on himself. And if… if he’d like to… I’d love for him to be my boyfriend.” The moment she says it, she somehow goes even redder. A nervous little squeak escapes her as she begins to fiddle with her hair, and Fuuka mumbles, “O-Oh, this is embarrassing.”
And Takeba just sits there, unable to do anything but process those lovely words. Warmth spreads through Takeba’s chest, and for a moment, he fears he’s going to cry. That might be one of the nicest things someone has ever said to him.
“Takeba-kun?” Fuuka says. “Did I say something wrong?”
He takes a deep breath. Swallows back the lump in his throat. Gets a hold of his emotions.
Takeba turns to look at her, a smile appearing on his face. “No… No, you didn’t say anything wrong. That was… Fuuka… that was… one of the nicest things I think anyone’s ever said to me.”
“Does that mean…?” Fuuka trails off, the hope audible in her voice.
Takeba nods his head. “I… I still think being seen around me is going to suck for you, but as long as you don’t mind… I’d like that too.”
“And I still think that I don’t care what nasty people think,” Fuuka says. She shuffles across the bench, getting a little closer to Takeba, and extends a hand, letting it rest on the seat, palm facing upwards. “I want to be your girlfriend, Takeba-kun.”
Somehow, Fuuka using the word ‘girlfriend’ makes this feel more real. His heart pounding, Takeba looks down at her hand, and then slowly, tentatively, covers it with his own. “I, I want that too,” he whispers, his stomach fluttering when Fuuka curls her fingers and interlocks them with his, letting them properly hold hands.
Squeezing her hand, Takeba looks at Fuuka. “So, uh… this is really happening, huh? I-If I’m being totally honest, Fuuka, I’ve… I’ve never dated anymore before. So, I’m sorry if I screw this up.”
“That’s okay, Takeba-kun,” Fuuka says, her ears glowing red. “I, I haven’t had a boyfriend before either. We… we can work things out together.”
“Yeah, we can.”
Takeba finally stops looking at Fuuka—his girlfriend—and turns his head. And meets the gaze of the old woman who was praying, who now stares straight at them. Takeba tenses, expecting a bad reaction. Perhaps she’ll clock him as trans and call him a slur. Or perhaps she’ll see them as both girls and get homophobic.
But, instead, the old woman just smiles. As his anxiety starts to fade, Takeba smiles back. Upon noticing their audience, Fuuka smiles awkwardly and waggles her fingers at the old woman. Takeba watches the woman’s smile get even broader, and he wonders if this random old lady is happy for them both. Or perhaps he’s just overthinking things again.
Once the old woman leaves, Fuuka shuffles even closer and says, “Now we’re alone… Takeba-kun, can I hold you?”
And even though they’re technically in public, and he’s still nervous about what people will think of Fuuka if she gets seen with him, and he’s not sure if it’s normal for couples to hug only moments after getting together, but… Takeba can’t deny how much he wants to be hugged by Fuuka. So, he nods and says, “Sure.”
Smiling, Fuuka reaches out to wrap her arms around him, slowly pulling Takeba into a hug. And Takeba closes his eyes as his arms go up to return the hug, leaning the side of his head against Fuuka’s and letting himself relax in her comforting, loving embrace.
---
When they return to the dorm, having spent the entire walk back desperately resisting the urge to hold hands (because Fuuka would love to, but she knows Takeba still isn’t comfortable with doing that in public right now) but unable to hide their smiles, Takeba finds himself stepping closer to Fuuka the moment he realises the lounge is empty except for them. If nobody is back by now, it’s highly unlikely anyone will show themselves… at least, that’s his justification for pulling Fuuka into another hug right in the middle of the lounge.
“O-Oh,” Fuuka gasps, clearly not expecting the display of affection from her boyfriend (it feels so good to call himself her boyfriend), but she happily wraps her arms around him, leaning her head on Takeba’s shoulder.
It’s such a wonderful moment… one that gets utterly shattered when the door swings open and he hears a familiar voice.
“Well, well, well, what’s going on in here?”
Takeba springs away from Fuuka like she gave him an electric shock, heat rushing to his cheeks. He turns to look at the doorway, where Junpei stands, a shit-eating grin on his face.
“Oh, Junpei-kun, you startled me,” Fuuka says, a hand on her chest.
“My bad,” Junpei says, clearly not having intended to nearly give Fuuka a heart attack. “Sorry, Fuuka.” Turning back to Takeba, that teasing smirk returns, and Junpei adds, “But Takeba, I’m hurt you didn’t tell me you’ve got a girlfriend. I thought we were best buddies.”
“And where did you get that idea, Stupei?” Takeba says, eyebrows raised, but unable to actually summon up any malice towards Junpei. He still isn’t sure why, but ever since he came out, Takeba has found himself more tolerant of Junpei’s stupid behaviour. It’s like they get on better now. Perhaps it’s because Takeba has been in a much better mood since he told the rest of SEES he’s a boy. “We both know I can’t stand you,” he says, but he can’t hold back laughter.
Junpei laughs too. “Wow, you’re an asshole,” he says through giggles, playfully and painlessly punching Takeba on the shoulder. “Keeping secrets from your best friend.”
Takeba fakes punching him back, and yelps in shock when Junpei pulls him into a gentle headlock, rubbing his knuckles against Takeba’s gelled hair. In the past, Takeba would absolutely flip his lid if Junpei did this to him, but things are different now; something he’s learning about being one of the guys is how much roughhousing boys tend to do with each other (even Sanada-san, who isn’t the roughhousing type, has taken to slapping Takeba on the back whenever they interact, hard enough to make him stumble a little) as a sign of… affection, he guesses. So, rather than stamping on Junpei’s foot hard enough to bruise and yelling at him, Takeba instead plays along. Especially because he knows that if he were to cry out in genuine distress, Junpei would stop it immediately.
“Quit ruining my hair, you jerk!” he says, giving Junpei a harmless jab in the stomach with an elbow.
“Make me, dweeb,” Junpei teases.
“Junpei-kun, please let my boyfriend go,” Fuuka says, trying not to laugh.
Once they remember that Fuuka is watching them screw around, both boys stop instantly. Junpei releases Takeba, who immediately smooths his hair back into place, and straightens his uniform, wanting to look presentable for his girlfriend. He shoots Junpei a playful glare, and Junpei beams back like he’s the most innocent guy in the world.
“A-And by the way, Junpei-kun, Takeba-kun didn’t tell you because we only started dating earlier this afternoon,” Fuuka explains, her cheeks flushing pink in a way that makes Takeba long to kiss her.
“To be honest, I still wouldn’t have told him,” Takeba teases, smirking at Junpei.
Junpei lets out a fake and very exaggerated gasp. “Oh, you’re so cruel, Takeba.”
Fuuka giggles. She doesn’t say anything, but from her expression, he wonders if she’s happy to see Takeba just having fun and messing around.
“Anyway…” Junpei says, like he wasn’t the one who caused that diversion. He smiles, the expression warm and genuine, and looks at Takeba. “I’m happy for you, dude. F-For both of you.”
“Thank you, Junpei-kun,” Fuuka says.
A little overwhelmed by Junpei dropping his class clown act so quickly, Takeba rubs the back of his neck. “Uh… yeah, thanks, Junpei.”
Junpei grins. “No problemo.”
“Are you planning on studying with us this evening?” Fuuka asks.
“Why would we need to study?” Junpei says, startled by the sudden change of subject.
“Because we have exams next week,” she explains.
Junpei’s eyes widen. “Oh shit! I forgot all about it.”
Fuuka giggles. “That’s why we decided to study together as second-years, remember?”
“Um… yeah, I totally remember,” Junpei says, utterly unconvincing.
“Idiot,” Takeba says, but if he’s being totally honest, he forgot about the planned group study session too.
(And a big part of him doubts he’ll be able to concentrate on anything other than his wonderful girlfriend.)
As he and Fuuka attempt to stop Junpei from leaving the dorm, aware that if Junpei escapes he’ll probably bail on this evening’s study session, Takeba finds himself smiling until his cheeks ache. He can’t remember the last time he felt this happy.