Chapter Text
The fluorescent lights dimmed down on the school’s carpet, as everyone started to pack up, when the bell suddenly rang. Exam results are finally out. I take a glance around the classroom, noticing my schoolmates running out and leaving.
I slowly got up from my seat as I threw my book bag over my back. I followed them out of the classroom nervously, and walked into the hallway when everyone started to gather around the bulletin board, to see who got the highest amount of points in our grade.
Trying my best to look at the bulletin board, I looked around to see the people around me. Getting closer when a familiar voice started coming towards me. “You did your best, Richmond.” I hear a voice, suddenly interrupting my thoughts.
It was Aliya, my best friend since childhood. Her voice was soft, but she sounded worried. Hearing those words, and her tone leaving her mouth, I knew something was wrong. I knew I had to see the board right now. Pushing the other students, as my gaze landed on the board and in just one glance, my heart pounded. “SECOND PLACE?!” I screamed internally.
Aliya rushed towards me, saying, “It’s okay, Richmond. It’s just a grade. Plus, second is almost as good as first place,” she said, looking at me.
Her saying that made my blood boil. “It’s not just a grade, you wouldn’t understand because you barely even come to school or even try to care about grades at all.”
But right when I realized what I just said, instant regret approached me. Looking at her expression made me feel even more guilty about what I said.
“Why wouldn’t I understand? Plus, just because I don't go to school doesn’t mean I don’t care about my grades,” She said, annoyed. As she turned around and walked away. A pang of guilt hit me, seeing her figure walk out of sight. I sighed softly, and knew I had to apologize later.
Giving a second glimpse at the board, trying to see who got first place. My eyes looked over the bulletin board, and I saw who was in first, “Jeromy Dizon”. With the amount of points he got on the exam.
I turned my head to the side, only to see him and his friends celebrating his success. I wanted to bang my head against a wall. Yes, I did pass, but I was supposed to get the highest number of points. Jeromy has always gotten first place ever since he moved here.
Since I’ve always gotten first place before he got here, and then he joined in the 9th grade. Now we are in 11th grade, and he’s been getting the highest grades. Also, my parents haven’t been fond of it either; they always pushed me to get the highest score.
However, I’ve tried my hardest to get the highest score. While Jeromy makes it seem effortless, because he doesn’t even try, he still passes with good grades.
My focus goes back to the bulletin board, as I look back at it one more time, hoping I read it wrong. But it still said Jeromy’s name. I looked down at my books, took off my bag, and inserted them into it.
Readjusting the bag on my back, I started to walk out of the school and into the parking lot. Looking around for my mom’s car.
While waiting for my mom to pick me up, my thoughts drifted into the concrete, as I thought to myself. “How would my parents react to this?” I knew that they would scold me for not being the best in my grade.
Yes, I did great in school, I helped others out, I was kind, and tried my hardest. Yet it still wasn’t enough for them. They wanted me to be the highest in my class. So I had to be the best. Anyways, I knew my devices were gonna be taken away, so I had to rely on reading for this next month.
As I thought more about how my parents would react, my thoughts got distracted by a car honking. My gaze fixating on the car, I realize it’s my mom honking.
I walked over to the back seat door, and entered, preparing for my parents’ scolding. My hands reached over as I took off my bag, and placed it between my legs.
My mom looked at me through the rear view mirror, smiling. Then asked, “Rich, makananu ka keng exam?” Rich, how’d you do in the exam? I looked up at her, as my gaze suddenly met hers.
“Oh, uhm, mekapasar ku.” Oh, uhm, I passed. Trying to shrug the question off, but she asked again, a bit more exasperated, and sternly now, “Richmond, makanuna ka.” Richmond, how’d you do.
My gaze went back down at my hands, and fiddled around with them. I knew I had to tell her, but I didn't want to. She’d end up being mad at me anyway.
Looking back up, and seeing her mad expression, I already knew it was over. “Meging pangadwa ku...?” I got second…?
I said, trying not to make her even more upset. Her jaw tightened, as her hands also clenched onto the wheel. “Kakadwa? Richmond, bala ku matalino ka?!” Second? Richmond, I thought you were smart?!
As she rolled her eyes, her arm reached back, and she demanded, “Phone. Ngeni.” Phone. Now.
Her hand was out, waiting for me to give her my phone. Sighing, I took my phone out of my pocket and gave it to her. Her hand drew back to the front as she threw it into the passenger's glove box.
Trying to speak again, I began saying, “Mom, but I tried-.” She cut me off by mocking me, saying, “‘Sinubukan ku ing sablang agyu ku.’ Kailangan mu ing mumuna keng kekang grade, kaya alang devices kilub ning adwang duminggu, uling ita ing makadistract keka.” I tried my hardest. You need to be first in your grade, so no devices for two weeks, because that’s what is distracting you.
Looking back down at my feet, feeling distraught, I began playing around with my fingers.
My mom looks back at me through the mirror, and scoffs, saying, “Magaga ka uling parusan daka keng pamaging tanga mu? At e ka magumpisa manangis, uling makanini ing malilyari nung ala kang pakialam keng reputasyun mu keng eskwela. Pati na rin, sabyan ku kang tata mu ing tungkul kaniti.” You’re getting mad because I’m punishing you for being dumb? And don’t you start crying, because this is what happens when you don’t care about your reputation at school. Also, I will be telling your dad about this.
I looked back up at her, but knew I couldn't say anything back or else I'd end up being in even more trouble. So I began looking out the window now, wondering to myself, why does he always get first?
I try my hardest for tests, and he doesn’t. It sucks. Waiting to pull up to my house, I wondered how my dad would react. Would he yell at me? Would he hit me? Would he sign me up for tutoring?
Well, probably all three, I think. Sighing once again, I see the familiar trees surrounding my house, and a sign saying, “De La Cruz.” I’m finally home.
My mom pulled into the driveway, turned off the car, and got out of it, annoyed. My eyes focusing back down at my feet, I picked up my bag and got out of the car. Looking over at the front door, it was wide open due to my mom being frustrated and overexaggerating everything.
As I made my way into the house, I already heard my mom gossiping with my dad in Tagalog about how “my grades are dropping, and how annoying I’ve been lately.”
Kneeling down, I untied my shoes and took them off, leaving them on the shoe rack. As I reached over to get my house shoes and slipped them on. Then I walked into my room, putting my backpack on my floor, and then heard my dad yell at the top of his lungs, “RICHMOND!!”
I took a deep breath and did the sign of the cross, hoping my parents wouldn’t punish me that much.
Walking into the kitchen, already feeling the tension, I say, “Wa?” Yes?
My dad, already looking mad, says, “Buri mu bang sabyan kanaku nung nanu ing lugal a ikwa mu para kareng exams?” Do you wanna tell me what place you got for exams?
Hearing his aggressive tone, I avert my face away from him and say, “Kadwa…pero aku-.” Second...but I-.
He puts up a finger and starts yelling at me, “Pero nanu?! Ika ing mumuna, nanu man ing malyari, alang devices kilub ning metung a bulan! at atin kang tutor.” But what?! You are to get first, no matter what, no devices for a month! And you’re getting tutored.
Looking back up at him, I say in a penitent tone, “I scored well? Why do I-.” He smacks my arm and yells at me once again, saying, “Second is not good! You should be first in everything! Your reputation matters, so you are to be tutored.”
My jaw was wide open, but I didn’t even try to rebel. I stayed quiet and nodded. My mom looked at me, and said, “Look at us, not the floor.”
Looking back up at them, I met both of their furious gazes, and she began to speak again, “Use your words, don’t just-.” She mocked me for nodding.
Seeing how she mocked me, it made me mad, but if I said anything I would just be in more trouble. I said in a hushed tone, trying my best not to cry, “Yes, mom…”
She gave me a satisfied look and said, a little less frustrated, “Now go to your room, and study.” As she waved her hand outward, telling me to go away. Immediately hearing those words, and seeing that gesture, I walked into my room and shut the door.
Right when I stepped into my room, I fell onto the floor. My fingers combed through my hair in frustration, as I thought about what they said.
Why was I going into tutoring? I’m smarter than all the kids in my grade except for Jeromy. I care about my reputation, but not that much. Why do I always have to be first?
While I thought to myself for the first fifteen minutes I've been in my room. I got up, opened my door to see if my parents were still in the kitchen. When I noticed they weren’t, I shut my door and I walked to my desk.
I rolled out my chair, and got onto my computer. Yes, I knew they were gonna take my devices, but they aren’t until night because they think I'm doing schoolwork.
Opening up my computer to see the login screen. I type in the password and go to search and type up Discord. To try to text my friends, well, specifically to text Aliya. When the browser loads, I open up my texts with her and start typing.
…
mond.richy: Aliya? Sorry about what happened earlier. It’s just I'm supposed to “care about my reputation” and be first, or else my parents will get mad at me. I’m really sorry about my outburst, though
aliya.m: haha, it's okay, it's just weird like 2nd place is good?? like your better than our whole grade
mond.richy: I’m supposed to care abt “my rep”, but yeah, it just sucks, and I got my devices taken, and I’m supposed to be studying, so talk to you later
aliya.m: oooh ok, well byeeee
mond.richy: Bye-bye
…
After talking to Aliya, I logged out of Discord and pulled up a math program that our school requires us to use.
While waiting for it to load, I got up from my desk, and I walked over to my backpack to get my supplies. I got out my notebook, pens, calculator, and binder as we got worksheets as well from school.
Sitting back down in my chair, I sighed, knowing I had to start working on my homework. Pulling out my binder and opening it, I began to work on my maths homework. I was an advanced student learning college-level math.
Nevertheless, I was known as “an underachiever" to my parents, however I consistently go above and beyond just to please them, and get the highest amount of points.
Later, after studying for 3 hours straight, I finished all of my work. My mom opened my door, saying, “Panaun na ning pamangan ngeni, at ibie me ing computer mu.” It’s time to eat now, and give me your computer.
I got up from my desk, stretched, grabbed my computer, and gave it to her. She drew her hand back quickly with the computer in her hand, and said, “Magmadali, munta ka keng kusina.” Hurry up, go to the kitchen
As she ushered me out of my room, she walked into her room. While I walked into the kitchen, where my baby brother and dad sat.
I placed the bowl delicately on the table and pulled out my chair and sat down in front of a bowl of puchero, A Filipino stew with Spanish influence. Grabbing my spoon, I began to eat it, as I also poured myself a glass of water.
I really wasn’t talking at the dinner table. My parents were talking to each other in Tagalog, and my brother was just babbling something.
When I was done eating, I put my plate into the sink. As I began to walk into my room, my mom stopped me. “Hugasan mu la reng pinggan, o paburen mu lang lukluk karin kapilan man?” Are you gonna wash the dishes, or are you gonna let them sit there forever? She said in a sarcastic tone.
I made my way back to the sink, and seeing the stained dishes in the sink already, made me annoyed. But I grabbed the sponge unenthusiastically and began washing the messy plates and cutlery.
After I was done washing the dishes for what felt like years, my mom looked over and said, “Take out the trash, do the laundry, and sweep the living room.”
Hearing her nonchalant tone made me even mad, but I couldn't argue. I gave her an unsatisfied smile and said, “Wa.” Yes.
...
Chores were exhausting. They made me feel like Cinderella, as she made me a list of tasks to take out the trash, do this, do that, blah, blah, blah.
Walking back into my room as I fell onto my bed, it felt relieving. Getting up from my bed, I went over to my drawers and picked out a pair of boxers, shorts, a towel, and a grey t-shirt.
When walking into my bathroom, I turned on the shower faucet, and heard the water come down and onto the shower floor. Taking off my school uniform, I hopped into the shower, feeling the warmth of the water run down my body.
Whilst I scrubbed away the shampoo and conditioner on my hair, my body cleanser washes away all at once. I shut the water off and reached out for my towel on the towel bar.
After drying my body off, I put my clothes on and walked into my room to get ready for bed. I felt the cold breeze hit me when I walked into my room, and I snuggled into my blanket and pillow, thinking to myself. Tutoring…? Really?
Well, I wonder who’s gonna be my tutor, but at least I'll be away from home for a bit. Thinking to myself, as I slowly fell asleep.