Work Text:
Riddle Rosehearts had been particularly... rageful lately. Too rageful. Trey Clover decided he needed to do something about it. So, while baking Riddle's favorite strawberry tarts, he had an idea— add a "special" ingredient.
"I'll add a pinch of this." Trey said as he sprinkled the ingredient into the tart while sticking his tongue out. After assembling the tart, Trey hand delivered it to Riddle, who was raging about Deuce forgetting his pink tracksuit for flamingo duty again.
"I SWEAR, Deuce, you need to START following the RULES, NO MATTER WHAT!!!" Riddle fumed. Deuce was wide eyed. He was scared like Riddle might collar him. Scared like he might hurt him. Scared like he might tell his mom. He didn't mean to forget.
Trey cleared his throat. "Ahem. Riddle, your tart as requested." Trey smirked as he handed it to Riddle. The tart crust had a somewhat herbal smell to it.
"Thanks Trey." Riddle said, paying no attention to the slight smell. Trey smirked and pushed up his glasses.
"You're welcome. After all, it is my duty to serve the Housewarden." Trey said kind of menacingly. It sent a chill down Deuce's spine.
"Trey, should I be concerned? That sounded creepy. Like, CREEPY CREEPY." Deuce shuddered. Trey just smiled.
"No need. You'll thank me later."
As Riddle finished the tart, he began to feel more... relaxed. Like the world wasn't screaming at him. Like rules weren't as stressful to enforce— or follow. Like his life had changed. He let out a content sigh.
"You know," he mused. "I think that the moon is actually a giant ball of cheese, but I'll never know. NEVER. I'm lactose intolerant!" He exclaimed, waving his arms slightly. Cater just stared, jaw dropping close to the ground.
"Hmmmmm. Anyways, rules are... guidelines. They're not necessary. You just gotta let go— WHY DO I HEAR COLORS!?" Right as the words left his mouth, Ace Trappola had walked in, expecting Riddle to be raging about the roses or something. Instead, he saw Riddle baked out of his mind.
"Woah, Riddle! Why are you doing drugs now? Where did you get them? How much did you pay? Did you actually make them? Was it fun? Can I—" Ace was cut off.
"Ace, you IDIOT! You're not giving him time to answer! Also, WHY THE FREAKING HECK WOULD YOU WANT SOME!?" Deuce yelled, gesturing wildly at Riddle, who was hugging one of the rose bushes, muttering something about plants having feelings.
"Ummmm, because it's FUN. I've had some when I was 14. I'll be fine!" Ace waved his hand dismissively. Deuce's eyes widened so far, you'd think his eyeballs were about to pop out.
"Ace, ARE YOU PUT OUT OF YOUR EVER LOVING FRICKIN MIND!? THAT'S ILLEGAL!" Deuce shrieked. "Oh my Sevens, my mom is gonna KILL me for associating with an ex drug addict!" Deuce whimpered.
"Deuce, relax! I was tricked into eating brownies, and I wasn't addicted, but... given the chance, I'd do it again." He smirked.
"Acey~ Deucey~ Guess what? Tonight, we're hosting your official wedding. Apparently, if you gaze at one another for exactly eight point seventy six seconds, that's legally a proposal~ The flower girl shall be Vorpal!" Deuce fainted dramatically. Ace's face paled.
"Wait, WHAT!? DUDE, WE'RE NOT DATING! GET A GRIP!" Ace yelled. Riddle's eyes teared up.
"But... bunny rabbits are secretly devilish creatures. If we don't proceed, they'll come and sacrifice us to the devilish entity known as Crowley!" Riddle panicked. Ace and Deuce were confused.
"OMG, this is gold! #RiddleIsInsane, #RiddlesHorseIsTheFlowerGirl #AdeuceCanon!" Cater said while filming the whole thing, laughing. Ace and Deuce looked at each other, and both decided to make a run for it. Cater put his phone into his pocket, and approached Riddle.
"Hey, let's getcha to your room, mkay?" Cater said while lifting Riddle off the ground to force him to stay in his room for the rest of the day.
The next morning, Riddle awoke with a massive migraine. He was nauseous. His head hurt so much. He was dizzy walking around.
"What happened yesterday? I almost never get migraines! Last I remember, I ate a tart!" Riddle's breath hitched. "I'm... sick." He ran over to the bathroom and threw up violently in the trashcan.
"Whatever happened yesterday, I NEVER want that again."