Chapter Text
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August 1990
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"How long does it take again?" Philip asked standing in the doorway of the en suite bathroom of their bedroom.
Margaret looks over at him from her perch on the bathtubs edge. "There should be something to see in another 8 minutes. But the box said it's best to wait the full 30 for the results."
Philip nods. "So, 28 minutes."
"28 minutes."
Philip blows out a breath, running a hand through his hair. "I'm going to check on Maddie, see how she's doing with her summer reading. See if Daniel needs anything before bed."
Margaret nods. "Maybe read him a chapter from that Hardy Boys book we've been reading? It seems to help him fall asleep."
"You can join us, might help the time pass."
Margaret shakes her head, blinking away the tears. "This is too important to walk away from."
Philip nods. "I'll be back in a bit." He says, stepping into the bathroom and leaning down to press a kiss to the top of his wife's head. "I love you, it's going to be okay. This is going to work."
"I don't know what I'll do if it doesn't." Margaret says.
Philip smooths a hand over her head. "We're not going to loose our son."
With that he steps out of the bathroom to check in on their two children. Maddie, nearly 10 and thinking herself a mature adult already, is sitting at her desk packing up her notebook and slipping it into her hot pink Jansport pack pack along with the the book she was reading.
"Hey sweetie." Philip says, leaning against the door frame.
Maddie looks over at him and flashes him a bright smile, the one she's been turning on for her parents since they learned of Daniel's diagnosis; since the cancer came back. It was her way of trying to ease her parents mind, she was okay, they didn't need to worry about her, she was strong and she would be fine.
"Hi daddy." She says.
"How's the reading going?"
"I finished Superfudge, I have to pick one more from the list. I was thinking maybe James and the Giant Peach. Maybe we can go to the library this weekend and I can pick it up?"
"Thats a great choice, we'll make sure to make time to stop this week."
"It's okay if we wait until the weekend, I know Daniel has an appointment tomorrow and the day after."
Philip shakes his head. "We will make the time, sweetheart, don't you worry."
"Okay, well... then I want to get a new book for Daniel too. I know you like those mystery books daddy, but I think Daniel's getting a bit bored with them."
Philip chuckles, walking beside his daughter as she pushes away from her desk and climbs into bed. "Oh you think so, huh?"
"I know you and mommy think it's just helping him get to sleep but I think it's putting him to sleep because it's so boring." She teases with a small smile.
"Boring?" Philip puts a hand to his chest in mock offense. "I'll have you know, those were my favorite stories when I was his age."
"Oh so they're boring and old."
"You little-" Philip dives in, tickling at Maddie's sides, making he squirm and giggle, a sound that lifted his spirts and healed his soul, for just a moment.
Philip relents after a few more giggles fill in the broken pieces of his heart, Maddie's laugh drifting off to little pants as she wiggles beneath the covers. Philip tucks the comforter tight around her, brushing her bangs away from her eyes.
"You okay? Need anything?"
"No, I'm fine."
"Cool enough in here?" Maddie nods. "Okay, good." Phillip bend over the bed and places a kiss to his daughters forehead. "Sweet dreams baby."
"Good night daddy."
Philip turns the light off on his way out of the bedroom, pulling the door mostly closed behind him. He stopped pulling it shut tight a couple years ago when Daniel first got diagnosed with leukemia, always leaving the doors open a crack in case that extra bit of barrier kept him from hearing his children call out to him in the middle of the night.
Daniel's room was down the hall, just past the bathroom he and Maddie shared. The boy was sitting up in bed, navy striped cover pulled up over his lap with a comic book laid out on top. "Superheroes or Garfield?" Philip asks as he enter the room.
Daniel looks up from the book, light shadows under his eyes the only visible sign that there was anything amiss. "Garfield." He says with a sheepish smile. "I don't really think I like it but, grandpa asked me what I thought when him and grandma were here last week. I felt bad that I hadn't read the book he got me for my birthday yet."
"You don't have to read it, buddy ."
"I know, but... he seemed excited to talk about it with me. I don't mind reading it and telling him about it if it makes him happy."
Philip smiles at his son, pride making him puff up his chest a little. "That is a very kind thing for you to do. It's nice that you want to do something just to make him happy. You're a good kid, you know that?"
Daniel shrugs, closing the book with a yawn. "I know." He says simply
Philip chuckles, picking the book up from his lap and setting it on the nightstand as Daniel shifts to lay back in his bed. "Any interest in the Hardy Boys tonight?"
"Not tonight, I'm too tired I think."
Philip nod, pulling the covers up. "You know, if you don't like the Hardy Boys, you can say something. We can pick something else for our buddy reads."
"But you like them."
"I do, I loved them at your age but you don't have to always do something just because someone else likes it. You can do things for yourself too, you know. It's very nice you reading Garfield for grandpa or reading the Hardy Boys for me but you can pick something you want too."
"Well..." Daniel trails off, his eyes cast down to the tread of his comforter he was pulling on.
"What is bud?"
"It's just..." Daniel sighs. "Everyone is always so quiet all the time, and sad. I know it because of me so I-I just wanted to do something to make everyone happy."
Phillip closes his eyes, giving himself a moment to push back the wave of emotion crashing over him. "Daniel," He says softly. "That's not anything you need to worry yourself about. I want you enjoy things that you want. I would be just as happy sitting and reading Captain America comics with you as I would the Hardy Boys."
Daniel nods and falls quiet for a moment, contemplative. "If... if we can really read anything I like to read those Narinia books. I think they're on Maddie's summer reading list and she was telling me about them and they sound really cool!"
Phillip smiles, nodding at his son. "Done deal. Maddie wanted to pick up a new book for you when we go to the library and get her next book."
"Okay!" Daniel says excitedly.
"Okay!" Philip echos, tussling Daniel's hair. "Need anything before bed?"
"I don't think so."
"Alrighty then." Philip leans down, kissing Daniel's forehead, same as he did to Maddie a few minutes before. "Good night, bud."
"Night dad." Daniel yawns again, turning onto his side and curling his hands up under his chin.
Philip turns the light off and watches his son for a minute longer before he's pulling the bedroom door closed, leaving it open a few inches just in case. He turns to the bathroom his children share, doing a once over to make sure things are put away and there's nothing left out on the floor. With nothing more to do to drag out the time, Philip makes his way back to his own bedroom.
Margaret is stepping out of the bathroom as he walks into their bedroom, delicately holding the small tube between her thumb and pointer finger.
"Is it..." Philip trails off, his gaze locked on the pregnancy test noticing the faint traced of a blue ring around it.
"It should get a little darker in the next hour, but..." Margaret slowly looks up. "It's positive."
"It's positive?" Philip stares at the vile held in his wife's hand in disbelief.
Margaret nods, a smile starting to bloom across her face. "It's positive. I'm pregnant."
Philip laughs, sweep her up in his arms and spins them in a circle. "You're pregnant!"
Margaret wraps her around around Philips shoulders, tears streaming down her cheeks. "I'm pregnant." She says, a soft laugh bubbling up. "We have another chance to save Daniel."
"Well, Mrs. Buckley," Dr. Mattison flips through the chart in front of him, before lowering the clipboard and looking at Margaret with a warm smile. "I am pleased to tell that you are indeed pregnant."
Philip's eyes slip closed for a beat, his shoulders sagging and he squeezes Margaret's hand. "So this is real?"
"It's as real as it can get. As far as I can tell you look to be about 6 weeks so we'll set up an ultra sound for two week and take a look at the baby. After that we can schedule additional testing to see if the baby will be a viable donor for Daniel. There's two different test that can be done to see if we have an HLA match, each done at different points in the pregnancy. The first is a CVS, we go in through the cervix or abdomen and take a small sample of the placenta at 10-12 week, with results coming back within 2 weeks."
"And the other?" Margaret asks.
"The other is called amniocentesis done between 15 and 18 weeks but instead of placental tissue, we take a sample of the amniotic fluid using a thin needle through the abdomen. It can take about 3 weeks for the results to come in, however it is a little less invasive and the risk of miscarriage is lower."
"There's a risk of miscarriage with the first test?" Philip asks.
"There are risks with any pregnancy, when you're adding more procedures that would increase that risk. Even with the CVS, though the risk is low; less than 1%. But given the gravity of the situation, it is important that you know any and all risks going in. The CVS is able to be done earlier in the pregnancy and we'll get the results in 1 to 2 weeks, in an effort to give you some amount of comfort, I would recommend that route. But it is entirely up to you, you don't have to have a decision now; you can wait until the first ultrasound. We'll need to get things scheduled but it's not something that has to be done today."
"I think... I think that might be best." Philip says, looking over at Margaret. "What do you think?"
Margaret nods. "We can't do it until I'm at least 10 weeks along anyway, I want to wait; at least until the ultrasound."
"Okay." Dr. Mattison says. "We'll get that scheduled for the end of the month, first week in September at the latest. Check in with reception before you leave and they'll get you all set up."
"Thank you, Dr. Mattison." Margaret says.
Philip reaches out his hand to shake the doctors. "Thank."
Dr. Mattison nods, looking between the two. "It's my pleasure, congratulations."
"Okay, Mrs. Buckley. Mr. Buckley." The nurse smile at them. "I'm just going to pull up your shirt a little squeeze some gel onto your stomach."
Margaret takes a breath and reaches out for Philips hand.
The nurse presses the scanner into the gel on Margarets abdomen, gliding it around as she keeps focus on the screen. "There we are." She says slowly, moving and angling the device for a clearer image. "You are absolutely, without a doubt, pregnant." She say with a smile, then points to what just looks like a little blob on the screen. "That right there is your baby." She tells them.
"There is it." Margaret breathes out, blinking away tears.
The nurse moves the wand around again then pauses with a small frown. She clicks a couple keys and moves the device again, getting a different angle.
"Is something wrong?" Philip asks, looking at the monitor to try to make out whatever it is that she's seeing.
"No, no." She says, setting the wand down with a gentle smile. "Nothing wrong. I'm just going to step out quick and grab Dr. Mattison, I just need him to review something for me."
Philip watches as she hurries out of the room then looks to his wife. "If everything is fine then why does she need the doctor?"
"It's probably nothing, Philip." Margaret tries to ease her husbands anxiety even though she's feeling unsettled herself.
Philip squeezed Margaret's hand, carding his fingers through her hair as they wait for the doctor to come in. They wait just a few minutes in a tense silence before Dr. Mattison enters the exam room with the nurse following just behind him.
"Good morning." He greets warmly. "How are we doing today?"
"Would be doing a lot better if we knew why the nurse here felt the need to bring you in." Philip says.
"Philip." Margaret chides.
Dr. Mattison simply smiles. "Nothing to worrying about, just something on the screen the Ellen wanted me to look at before anything was mentioned. I'm just going to take a look myself, sorry to have to put any more of this gel on you Margaret." He says.
"It's fine." Margaret flinches as the contact of the cool gel hitting her stomach again.
"Alright, let's see here." Dr. Mattison slides that wand across Margaret's abdomen, leaning in close to the screen as the image shifts and reforms.
"There." Ellen, the nurse, points to the screen.
From where Philip is, he sees the same thing as before; the little unidentifiable blob that will grow into a baby. "What?" He asks, looking from the screen to Dr. Mattison and back.
"I don't, oh... wait, no there is it. Yes, Ellen, you were right." Dr. Mattison moves the device again, the image looking no clearer to Philip. "So, right here," He says, point to the blotch that is their baby. "That is you baby, I know it looks like an ink stain. But you can see the slight curve of the head here. And this other splotch of white?" Dr. Mattison points out a spot just to the right and a little above the first. "This... well, it looks like that is a second baby." He tells them, turning to look back at the couple.
"S-Second baby?" Philip states at the image on the screen.
"Two?" Margaret says, glancing up at Philip then looking back to the doctor. "Are you sure?"
Dr. Mattison nod, tapping a few keys to print out the image. "You're having twins." He reaches around to the left of the machine and tears off the printed ultrasound, handing it to Margaret. "Now, I need to mention that this could complicate things." He says, wiping the gel from Margarets stomach.
"How so?" Philip ask, trying to keep a hold on his rising anxiety.
"Well, age already put you in a high risk category; 35 is considered a geriatric pregnancy. Twins, increases risk for complications and that would be the case regardless of age."
"What do we do?" Margaret asks, sitting up with the help of Philip.
"You're going to have more appointments than most might, we'll need to monitor more closely so we know when to intervene if we have to. In a typical pregnancy as I'm sure you're aware, most appointments are every 4 weeks or so, how ever due to the higher risk and the delicate nature of this conception we're going to have you coming back every two weeks through the first trimester then we'll have you come in once a week through the second and third. As we get closer to the due day, which right now is projected to be April 20th, we'll have you come in maybe twice a week. Of course if there is anything that feels off or wrong, call immediately and go right to the ER."
"What does this me for the match testing? Can that still be done?" Philip asks.
"Yes, of course. However, given that appearance of the second baby, I would now recommend the amniocentesis. The CVS, as I mentioned in your last visit, can be done as soon as 10 weeks and we can have those results back in a week or two, but it is a more invasive procedure. The risk of miscarriage is low but the risk is there nonetheless."
"The amnio-" Philip starts to pronounce the test but fails to remember it's name.
"Amniocentesis." Dr. Mattison fills in.
"Yes, that one. That one takes longer right?"
"It does." Dr. Mattison nods. "We can't preform that test until you're at 15 weeks and it can be up to 3 weeks before we know the results. But, we can collect amniotic fluid from both sacs with less physical stress on you body. Less stress on your body, means less stress on the babies."
"It's safer?" Margaret asks.
"It is, yes. With the help of an ultrasound to guide, we insert a thin needle into your uterus and draw out the fluid from each sac. 20 minutes and we're done. We'll be able to get a comprehensive picture of everything we need to know. We'll be able to determine which twin is a match for Daniel or if both are, there some chromosomal abnormalities we'll be able to get a read on as well as some genetic disorders that may be present. We'll also be able to determine the gender if that's something you'd want to know. There is no wrong choice, I understand the anxiety of not know if this will work out how you expect it to. If you would prefer to get your answers sooner, we can preform the CVS."
"But you recommend the amniocentesis?" Margaret asks, stumbling a little on the word.
Dr. Mattison nods. "I do, the twins add an additional risk. While the CVS has the benefit of speed, it is more invasive, we want to put as little strain on your body and on the twins as we can."
Margaret nods, looking up to Philip. "What do you think?"
Philip releases a sigh. "Well, we're in this regardless of the results. If the best odds for the twins is to wait, then I think we wait."
"Okay." Margaret says, looking back to Dr. Mattison. "We'll wait."
Dr. Mattison nods. "Alright, we will get you set up with an appointment at Magee Women's Hospital. It's not too far for you to travel?"
Philip shakes his head. "I work in Pittsburgh and Daniel's care is also in the city, it's not a problem at all."
"Why do we need to go to the hospital? Can't you do the testing here?" Margaret asks.
"Unfortunately not. I'm not able to preform it here and while I have done amniocentesis test myself, in your case I would like to bring in a perinatologist who sees cases like yours every single day. At Magee, an amniocentesis test is just another Tuesday; it's routine for them by now. They'll be in touch with me through the whole thing, letting me know if there were any concerns or complications. They are the best in the state, I promise you."
"Alright, okay." Margaret nods. "It's in the best interest of the babies then, to have someone else preform the test and to go to the hospital."
"The babies and you Margaret." Dr. Mattison says. "I wouldn't refer you to them if I didn't truly believe you would be in the best hands. You'll go in, they'll have you set up in an exam room much like this one but they have far more equipment. It'll be 20 minutes with an additional wait of 30 minutes for observation. Then you just take it easy in the 24 hours that follow. Magee is renowned for their high-risk pregnancy care, they have an incredible staff there."
"So, in a few more weeks we'll go in?" Margaret says.
"We'll get you set for an appointment for mid-October. Until then, I'll see you every 2 weeks so we can keep an eye on things, but you'll be primarily in the care of Dr. Watts and Magee. Her expertise exceeds my own and will be the best provider going forward."
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October 1990
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Philip sits next to Margaret in the maternal-fetal medicine clinic waiting area. It's a smaller room, a few inviting plush chairs and a couple sofa's with soft music playing from the overhead speakers. Margaret has a clip-broad in her lap, filling out the various forms that were handed to her when they checked it. Philip looks around the room, soft watercolor paintings of flowers on the wall and women's health magazines on the tables. There's a twisted ball of anxiety in his stomach.
What if this doesn't work?
What if neither twin is a match?
What if only one twin is and they loose them?
What if this pregnancy is too much on Margaret and I loose her?
Thoughts and questions swirling in his head that he can't beat down. There is so much riding on this, so much that they could loose. They do this test and the results could tell them to start planning a funeral for this son while welcoming two newborns at the same time.
"Mrs. Buckley?" A voice cuts through the silence of the room, pulling Philip and Margaret's attention. "Hi." Says a petit women in her mid 30's with dark brown hair. "I'm Lauren, I'll be you prenatal procedures coordinator. I'm here to help answer any questions you may have and just help you through everything leading up to the birth. I took a quick look at your chart, you're having twins?" Lauren says with a smile. "How exciting."
"It was certainly unexpected." Margaret says, laying a hand on the small bump of her stomach.
"I'm sure." Lauren says. "Well, we've got a room already for you. Mr. Buckley, you're welcome to come in if you'd like."
"Oh, yes-yes of course." Philip nods, get up and extending a hand to help Margaret.
"Great, if you'll both just follow me." Lauren head to the door she'd come from, holding it open for Philip and Margaret. "Your regular OB went through the procedure with you?"
"He did, yes." Margaret tells her.
"Are there any questions or concerns that you have?" Lauren stops at an open door, gesturing for them to enter.
"I can't think of anything, but I didn't finish these forms." Margaret hold up the clip-board.
Lauren waves her hand. "Oh, don't worry about those. There are some impossible questions on there to answer, I can help you fill them out while we're waiting for the medial team to come in."
"That would be wonderful, thank you."
"Of course, it's why I'm here." Lauren take the clip-board. "Now, why don't you hop up here. Mr. Buckley you can take this seat here. You'll be able to stand by Mrs. Buckley's side during the procedure."
Philip nods, dropping into the seat quietly.
"Philip?" Margaret says gently. "Are you alright?"
Philip looks to his wife and tries to give her a reassuring smile. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"Philip." Margaret says, fond and soft. "I was the one who was worried about this, you've been the positive cheerleader throughout everything. What's changed?"
Philip chuckled, shaking his head. "I don't know, I guess being here... it all just got so much more real. There's so much that can go wrong, not just the twins not being a match for Daniel."
"Oh, sweetheart." Margaret lays a hand on his cheek.
"If I may." Lauren says quietly. "I've seen a few patients come in with a similar situation as yours, and I have seen more successes and happy endings then I've seen failures. I have faith that everything will be alright, everyone involved will come out of this happy and health."
"Thank you." Philip nods his head at her gratefully.
There's a gentle knock on the door before it opens to a tall, dark-skined women steps in with two nurses following behind her. "Good morning." She greets with a kind smile. "I'm Dr. Watts, I'll be preforming the amniocentesis today with the assistance of Nurse Kaylee and Nurse Morgan. How are we doing today?"
"As good as we can be, my husband is getting a little nervous now but Lauren's doing a wonderful job at setting our minds at ease."
Dr. Watts nods. "The nerves are completely understandable, I've spoken with Dr. Mattison about your case a few times in the last few weeks. It's certainly a stressful situation, any pregnacy can be stressful adding twins and everything else with your other son is bound to elevate that stress. I'm here to ease that stress as much as I can. I have never had any complications come up during an amniocentesis I've preform or after it's been done. All infants have been in the best of health. I can't give you any guarantees on the results but I can at least reassure you that the pregnancy will remain viable. There is always the chance the something happens but as far as my role here, it will not create any issues."
"Dr. Watts is the best." Lauren comes over to Margaret's side, laying a hand on her arm. "I'll take these with me and come back in when everything is all done and we can get them finished."
"We'll see you in a bit then." Margaret says with a smile.
"Thank you Lauren." Dr. Watts says as Lauren leaves the exam room, closing the door behind her. “All right,” She says. “We’re ready to begin. This will be done slowly and carefully, and I’ll talk you through every step. If at any point you feel discomfort or need to pause, just say so.”
Margaret nod, her eyes locked on Philip’s. Philip stands and takes his wife hand, in both of his.
Dr. Watts give a short nod to the nurse. “Let’s begin.”
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November 1990
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"The twins are looking great." Dr. Watts says with a smile, her eyes on the screen of the ultrasound. "Twin 1 here is making measuring a little tricky, they keep moving around, but Twin 2 looks to be around 6 inches with is right in range for twins at 18 weeks. Twin 1 is certainly more active but it looks to be about the same size, maybe even just slightly longer." She hits a few keys to freeze and print the image on screen before turning the monitor off. "How are you feeling?"
"Huge at 18 weeks." Margaret says with a laugh.
"You're beautiful." Philip says, leaning down and pressing a kiss to her forehead.
"Twins seems to speed some things up, they need the room and the certainly make it." Dr. Watts says with a gently laugh. "Aside from that, anything else going on?"
"I've been feeling them move a lot more, one of them likes to tumble around in there a lot."
"Judging form the ultrasound, I'm going to say thats Twin 1."
"Philip's been pouting because he's not able to feel anything yet, Maddie and Daniel too. Daniel's not even entire convince they're in there."
"That's normal." Dr. Watts says with a smile. "You can show these to Daniel as proof, they're both becoming more defined; you can see their nose and eyes there. You can tell your son and daughter they should be able to feel their little siblings in a few more weeks. Anything else that you're feeling?"
"She's been complaining a little more about her back." Philip says.
Dr. Watts nods. "That's to be expected, and maybe even some additional pelvic pressure. If you feel anything that is unbearable I want you to come right here. If there's anything that you are just a little concerned about, give me a call and I'll let you know what you should do. Now," She says, grabbing a folder off the counter and turning to the expecting parents. "I've got the results from the amniocentesis."
Margaret's hand reaches out and grabs Philips as she shifts to sit up straighter. "They're back? How are they? Are they health?"
"Both the twins are perfectly healthy, no notable abnormalities. They're the perfect set of twins, textbook actually."
The tension in Philips shoulders eases and he visible sags. "And the donor match?"
Dr. Watts smiles. "Both of the twins are a match for Daniel, completely genetically compatible."
Philip pauses, blinking at the doctor stunned. "Both are a match?"
"Both Twin 1 and Twin 2 are a match, yes. One is what would be considered an ideal match, they matched to the 10 markers that are tested. The other twin is just shy of perfect, matching 9 of the 10 markers but still a viable donor."
"Oh my god." Margaret breaths out, her hand raised to her mouth. "Both, both of them... they..."
"Both could provide what Daniel needs." Dr. Watts reiterates. "The ideal match twin would give slightly better odds for successful grafting but the difference between the two is so small that you have two extremely viable paths. You've given Daniel the absolute best chance."
Margaret lets out a wet laugh, turning into Philip's side as he curls over her, wrapping an arm around her. "He's going to be okay." Philips whispers to her. "We did it, we're all going to be okay."
Margaret eases from her husbands embrace after a moment, taking the tissue Dr. Watts is holding to her with a grateful nod. "If... if something goes wrong with-with one twin as the donor... would it be possible to-to use the other twin?" She shakes here head. "God, that sounds so horrible."
"It's doesn't, I promise you." Dr. Watts reassures her. "In the event something happens with the transplant and it fails, the other twin could be used, yes. We'd of course have to do some checks on the infant and Daniel as well but yes. Having both twins be a match is remarkable in and of itself, having both twins be perfect and nearly perfect is as close to a miracle as I've seen. Having this additional match, provides a safety net with no negative impact to the babies medially speaking."
"That's... that's such a relief." Margaret lays back with a sigh, a hand pressed to her forehead. "We have double the chance to save Daniel and both the twins will grow up happy and healthy."
"Right now, I would say to just take the good news and bask in it." Dr. Watts says. "There's plenty of time to worry in the coming months, but right now? We couldn't have asked for better results. If you wanted a little more good news, I could share the gender of each twin."
"You know the genders?" Margaret sits up in a rush, making Philip dive forward to steady her.
Dr. Watts chuckles. "You need to take it easy for you and your husbands sake." She says. "I saw on the ultrasound but the test results also confirm it; did you want to know?"
Margaret looks to Philip in silent question. "Daniel's been insisting on us giving him a little brother."
"And Maddie groans everytime." Margaret chuckles, looking back to Dr. Mattison and nodding. "I think we'd like to know."
"Both twins are completely health boys."
"Boys." Philip chuckles, bringing Margaret's hand to his lips. "Daniel will be thrilled."
"And Maddie will be planning her escape, poor thing." Margaret smiles, laying an hand over her swollen belly. "Twin boys." She says with a sigh. "Everything is going to change so much."
"It's going to be better than ever."