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Hugo has never been one for royal balls, even before his shiny new job in Corona required him to attend them. Sure it was fun to dress up and walk among snobs for a night knowing how much they would despise a street rat like him infiltrating their pompous world, but that was where the list of reasons to enjoy such events ended.
He thought the last ball he’d ever have to attend would be the one he, Varian, and Yong went undercover for back in Koto. After that, Hugo naturally assumed his days waltzing among snobs were over.
But of course he was wrong.
As he stands here in stiff formal attire at the bottom of a ridiculously long staircase, Hugo can’t help but wonder how exactly he’d gotten himself caught up in this situation.
You know exactly how, his mind unhelpfully supplies. Because his pathetic one-sided crush on his best friend has rendered him unable to refuse Varian anything he requests. Usually it’s small things that Hugo doesn’t mind doing because Varian rarely asks favors of him anyway, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t come back to bite him in the ass every once in a while. This was one of those times.
It started when Varian stormed into their shared lab like a tornado, clutching a stack of envelopes stamped with the seals of various kingdoms.
“Hello to you too, Goggles.” Varian doesn’t slow as he marches towards Hugo. “Where’s the—“
Fire, he doesn’t get to say before Varian is standing close enough that the toes of their shoes are nearly touching.
“I need your help.”
Hugo has to bite his tongue to prevent himself from saying something embarrassing like “always” or “I would do anything for you”, and instead raises an eyebrow to show he’s listening.
Nothing could prepare him for the words “I need you to be my boyfriend” to come out of Varian’s mouth.
It takes a solid ten seconds of standing there and looking stupid for Hugo’s mind to register what had just been said. “I… what?”
Varian stammers through an explanation as he begins pacing, words nearly incoherent with how fast he speaks. His hands flutter around like he can’t figure out what to do with them, so Hugo reaches out and grabs the envelopes from his hands.
“What are these?” He asks, flipping through them with feigned disinterest.
“Letters!” Varian shouts.
Hugo gives him a flat look. “From?”
Varian pauses his angry pacing to rip a letter from Hugo’s hand and shove it in his face. “Suitors.”
Hugo laughs out of pure disbelief. “I’m sorry?”
“See for yourself.” Hugo snatches the letter back and scans through the words. “Every letter says the same thing: that they’re coming for the Sun Festival to court me. Me, Hugo!”
Something unpleasant unfurls in Hugo’s gut at the thought of so many nobles trying to get their hands on Varian. Flirting with him, dancing with him, touching him. It makes his skin crawl.
“You don’t actually want any of these people, right?” Despite already knowing the answer, he needs to hear Varian say it out loud.
“Of course not!” Varian exclaims, sounding offended. “Aside from the fact that they only want me because of my status both within Corona and Umbra, I’m not looking for that right now.”
He hates how that answer makes him feel better. Maker, he’s a terrible person. He needs to remember that Varian isn’t his.
“Can’t your sister do something about it?”
Varian scoffs. “Not technically. It’s not like she can stop them from coming to the Sun festival. And I can’t even ask her, because then she’ll come up with some elaborate Rapunzel plan to get me out of this situation.“
“Right. I feel the need to point out that having me pretend to date you is the Varian equivalent to an elaborate Rapunzel plan.”
“Not the point,” Varian says with a glare.
Hugo hums. “And Eugene can’t have his guards on cockblock duty because he needs all eyes on the ‘important’ people.”
Varian nods. “Exactly. And besides, you’re kind of the only person I trust to help me out with this.”
Okay, that’s not fair. How is Hugo supposed to say no when Varian pulled the trust card?
“You do realize how ridiculous this sounds?”
Varian snorts. “Of course. But think about it, it makes sense! We’re best friends, we have the chemistry—“
“Bantering isn’t chemistry.”
“Please, Hugh. Just for a week.”
Of course Hugo agreed. because as aforementioned, his stupid crush has stripped him of the ability to say no to Varian.
And maybe, just maybe, there’s a part of him that feels like he’ll never truly be able to make up for how the Light Trial went. It may have been two years ago, Varian may have forgiven him and offered him a fresh start in Corona, but Hugo will never forget the feeling of nearly losing his best friend because of something he did, because he was too cowardly to face his fears. He’ll spend the rest of his life trying to make it up to Varian, and it will still never be enough.
But anyway.
The Sun Festival is a week full of dancing and celebrations that all lead up to Rapunzel’s birthday, meaning Hugo and Varian will have to keep up with their ruse for seven days. The festival starts the same way it will end: with a ball.
Which is why Hugo is currently waiting. He’s not nervous. He’s not. So what if he has to go the entire night pretending like this arrangement is just another con to him? He can do it. He can lie, Hugo’s great at lying.
Another part of Hugo wonders if it isn’t his own part he’s worried about, but rather the knowledge that everything Varian will say and do tonight is fake. Will he be able to handle that? Knowing that it’s only fake to one of them?
Before he’s able to spiral down his thoughts again, a soft “ahem” from the top of the staircase catches his attention.
Varian stands at the top, one gloved hand resting on the banister while the other taps nervously against his leg.
Oh, Hugo thinks, eyes wide with awe. He’s the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.
Varian descends the stairs one step at a time, his boots making little to no sound as he does. His hair is pulled back with clips and pins hidden well enough that Hugo can’t see, the teal of his hair woven back in a small, intricate braid. With his hair out of his face for once, his freckles are all the more prominent and Hugo is transfixed on them.
His clothing is a mixture of dark blues and grays, the traditional colors of Umbra. They look beautiful on him and bring out the myriad of bright blue hues shining in his eyes.
Varian looks ethereal.
He reaches the bottom of the staircase, looking up at Hugo with a bashful tuck of his hair behind his ear. “You clean up nice,” Varian says. “You should get dressed up more often.”
Hugo is breathless. He literally can’t breathe, not with Varian looking like this and standing so close and complimenting him like it’s no big deal.
“Y—you too,” Hugo manages. Maker, he sounds wrecked. Nope. Time for a joke, anything to distract himself from the pounding of his heart against his ribcage. “I miss the goggles, though.”
This gets a smile out of his best friend that showcases his buck teeth, and Hugo feels that fluttering sensation in his stomach that’s become all too familiar since realizing just how down bad he is for Varian.
“Right?” He asks, patting his head as if he’ll find they’ve magically reappeared. “It’s going to be weird not having them to fidget with.”
Hugo hums. “I like the braid, though. ‘S cute.”
Is it his hopeful imagination, or does Varian’s face flush ever so slightly at those words? No. Must be a trick of the light.
“We’re matching,” Varian observes, gesturing to the braid in Hugo’s half up, half down hairstyle. “I’m sure we make quite a striking pair.”
“One of us certainly looks better than the other,” Hugo admits as he offers his arm.
Varian snorts as he takes Hugo’s arm. “You’re such an asshole.”
I didn’t mean me, he thinks as they head towards the throne room. Hugo keeps sneaking glances at the other boy as they walk, and he’s pretty sure Varian can tell, but they both choose not to say anything.
They get to the door of the throne room and stop. Varian inhales and exhales a little forcefully, the way Hugo knows he does when he’s trying not to back out of something.
“Hey,” the blond whispers, slightly nudging Varian to get his attention. “It’ll be alright, you’ve got this. I’ll make sure none of those suitors think you’re available.”
Varian offers him a grateful smile, but he remains tense.
Hugo frowns. “It’s not just the suitors, is it?”
“I wish it was. Stuff like this just makes me anxious. I wish the idea of being important to such a powerful kingdom wasn’t so petrifying.”
Hugo hums, understanding that Varian is talking about both Corona and Umbra. “Understandable, but you don’t owe it to any of them to be perfect.”
“I owe it to them to try. ”
There’s a determined light in Varian’s eyes despite still visibly being nervous, and Hugo falls just a little more in love. Leave it to Varian to push himself to try his best for people he hardly knows, despite being utterly terrified. He’s so selfless it makes Hugo’s chest ache.
A thought comes to him, small and quiet. You don’t deserve him.
Hugo uses his free hand to squeeze Varian’s, pushing that thought away. He can deal with those feelings later. Right now is about Varian.
“I’ll be here,” he says, holding Varian’s gaze. “You won’t be alone, V. I’m not going anywhere.”
Varian’s expression melts into something softer. His voice is barely above a whisper when he says, “Thanks, Hugh.”
“Yeah.” They’re both whispering now. Neither of them are breaking eye contact, and Hugo realizes his hand is still on Varian’s. He fixes that quickly. “I mean, I kind of can’t go anywhere. Being your boyfriend and all.”
The word boyfriend leaves a bitter taste in Hugo’s mouth, but it doesn’t matter because Varian laughs.
“Yeah, you’re stuck with me tonight.”
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
Varian nods once before pushing open the grand doors.
***
It takes all of five minutes for the first suitor to find Varian. Hugo stepped away to grab drinks while Varian went to find Rapunzel. When he turned back, a noble clad in traditional Galcrest clothing is standing much too close to Varian, whose back is almost pressed against a column to the side of the room.
Unbelievable. Hugo’s eyes narrow into slits as he sets the glasses of lemonade back on the table, making a beeline for the pair.
“—just don’t think I’ll be available this week,” Varian is saying, looking anywhere but the noble focusing on him with an unsettling gaze. “You know, alchemy stops for no one.”
“Perhaps I can join you,” the noble replies, one hand coming up to trail a finger down Varian’s arm.
“No thank you.”
“You see, I feel like—“
“ Excuse me ,” Hugo snaps, yanking the noble’s wrist. “He said no.”
The other man looks him up and down with barely concealed disgust. “Get your dirty hand off me.”
Hugo doesn’t let go so much as he shoves the hand away from him. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Eugene taking notice of the situation. He excuses himself from a conversation he was having and makes his way over. “Keep your hands off him,” Hugo snarls.
Varian grabs Hugo’s wrist. “Hugo,” he hisses.
The noble scoffs. “Who even are you?”
“His boyfriend.” In any other situation, Hugo would’ve delighted in Eugene’s comically shocked face upon hearing, but his gaze is focused solely on the idiot trying to stare him down. “I’m also the guy who’s going to break your nose if you lay a fucking hand on him again.”
“Hugh, it wasn’t that big of a—“
The noble rolls his eyes. “Whatever. There are plenty of better fish in the sea, anyway.”
Hugo’s eyes follow him as he walks away, embarrassment clear in every one of his steps.
Good riddance, asshole.
“Shit,” Varian says. “Eugene is coming over here— I don’t want to explain to him right now what that was, we need to—“ his eyes, which were scanning the ballroom, settle on the dance floor. “Dance. Now.” He takes off through the crowd and Hugo has no choice but to follow him lest he be the sole receiver of Eugene’s wrath.
Varian scowls as people bump into him and he nearly trips when a random prince doesn’t watch where he’s going. On instinct so as not to lose him, Hugo’s hand finds the dip in Varian’s waist. Varian jolts a bit out of surprise, but he doesn’t protest as Hugo uses that to guide him to the dance floor. It’s easier to get through the crowd like this.
They get there just as a new waltz is starting. They bow quickly before the dance begins.
“What was that?” Varian asks.
Ah, right. He hadn’t sounded too pleased back there. “Uh, what was what?”
Varian shoots him a look, the same one he usually does when he thinks Hugo is being dumb. “I asked you to be my boyfriend, not my guard dog.”
Hugo grins sheepishly. “Ah, well. Must’ve gotten lost in translation.”
“Seriously, I don’t want that guy getting mad at you. Rich people can be pretty spiteful when they want to be.”
No one knows that better than Hugo. “He was bothering you.” Not a question, a fact. Varian had been hiding it well, but Hugo knows him better than he knows himself, and therefore knows what Varian looks like when he’s trying to hide discomfort.
Varian focuses on the floor as they spin. “…a bit.”
“Then that’s all that matters,” Hugo decides. “He was bothering you and I had to step in like any good boyfriend would’ve.”
Varian cracks a smile. “Well, you’re a convincing actor. I was convinced for a moment that you were actually…”
Hugo raises an eyebrow when Varian trails off. “Actually what?”
Varian shakes his head. “Nothing. Forget it.”
It’s clearly not nothing based on the way Varian is chewing on his bottom lip, but Hugo also isn’t going to push it. Instead, he changes the subject.
“You didn’t tell Fitzherbert about our plan?”
Varian laughs nervously. “Uh, no. No, I did not. He would’ve tried to talk me out of it, or— I don’t know. I didn’t tell Rapunzel either.”
Huh. So no one knows. “That means they both think we’re together.” Ha, Eugene is going to hate him even more now.
“Yup,” Varian replies, popping the p. “He’s probably gonna spend the night hunting us down for answers.”
Hugo shudders. “I am not looking forward to that shovel talk.”
Varian gives him a lopsided smile. “You want out?”
He spins Varian out. When Hugo pulls him back in, Varian’s back is pressed against his chest.
“Never,” he whispers, voice low in Varian’s ear.
Hugo finishes the waltz by lowering Varian into a dip and twirling him again when he’s pulled back up. The dance ends with both of Varian’s hands on Hugo’s chest to steady himself, slightly out of breath like he’d been running. Their bodies are nearly flush together and Hugo’s hands automatically slide down to find their place on either side of Varian’s waist.
“Okay,” Varian murmurs. The music has shifted to something lighter and people are beginning to shuffle off to the sides to mingle, but the two of them stay stubbornly in the center of the dance floor.
Hugo takes a shaky breath and decides it’s going to be a very long night.
***
The rest of the night goes off without a hitch. Hugo trails behind as people stop to speak with Varian, keeping one hand in his the entire time. He plays the part of a boyfriend perfectly, but it’s not exactly difficult when the feelings he’s “faking” are very much real. The glances he steals when Varian is laughing? Real. The way his hand reflexively reaches out when Varian pulls away for only a moment? Real. The protectiveness he feels when the suitors try (and fail) to strike up conversation? Real.
Maker, he’s so pathetically enamored with Varian. He hadn’t even realized just how badly he’d been longing for an excuse to let his touch linger a little longer, to be able to wipe a smudge of cupcake frosting from the corner of Varian’s lip with his thumb, to allow himself to gaze at his best friend without having to awkwardly pretend he wasn’t staring. But now that he has an opportunity to do all those things, Hugo finds himself dangerously wishing this arrangement wasn’t temporary. He finds himself dangerously wishing this arrangement was real.
There’s one moment after they’ve finished a more energetic dance— one that that includes lots of jumping and kicking— where they’re standing there, laughing breathlessly. Varian looks up at Hugo with that breathtaking smile of his and reaches for his face.
“Your glasses are crooked,” he says, setting them straight. Instead of pulling his hand back, Varian’s eyebrows pinch together and he lets his fingers trail lightly down to Hugo’s cheekbone. Hugo’s breath hitches and before he realizes what he’s doing, he gently grabs Varian’s wrist to hold his hand there.
He’s struck with a thought, sudden and fierce.
I want to kiss him.
For a moment he goes perfectly still, desire urging him to close the gap between them and just do it. For a moment, he considers it.
But he doesn’t. He refuses to let his first kiss with Varian happen like this, while they’re pretending. He’d rather never kiss him at all than kiss him and live with knowing it’s only real to one of them.
Instead Hugo turns his face and closes his eyes, gently brushing his lips against the pulse point of Varian’s wrist. It isn’t what he truly wants, but it’ll have to do.
When he finally opens his eyes, Varian’s stunned face is cherry red, gaze focused on his wrist. “What— was one of the suitors watching?”
“Yes,” Hugo lies without so much as looking away.
***
The air is warm and slightly humid when they finally leave the ballroom, escaping out onto a balcony tucked away from the chaos happening inside.
Varian inhales deeply, a content smile on his face as he rests his forearms on the banister. “You know, tonight hasn’t been all that bad.”
Hugo hums in agreement, mirroring his position. A ray of moonlight falls on Varian’s face, giving his complexion a soft glow. Hugo can’t help but smile softly.
“Not one suitor has successfully gotten to you all night.”
“Except for that first one. You know, the one you threatened.”
Hugo cringes. “Right. Probably not my best moment.”
Varian huffs. “Probably not.”
Hugo steals a glance at him. “Did that bother you?”
There’s a small pause as Varian traces imaginary patterns on his sleeve. “Not as much as it should, if I’m being honest. Part of me enjoyed seeing you put him in his place.”
Hugo is unable to hide his self-satisfied smirk, ducking his head so the other won’t see. It doesn’t work because Varian snickers and bumps their shoulders together.
“Don’t get a big ego about it,” he says. “It was still totally inappropriate behavior towards someone of his status.”
Hugo waves him off. “I’ve pissed off plenty of nobles in my lifetime, I’ll be fine.”
Varian quirks an eyebrow, but doesn’t say anything. Hugo notices that their shoulders are still pressed against each other, neither of them pulling away as they enjoy the companionable silence.
Hugo, naturally, is the first to break it.
“Earlier, when you said my acting was convincing, you said that even you were convinced that I was ‘actually’ something. But you never finished that thought.”
Varian’s hand stops. “Oh. I uhm… does it really matter?”
Yes. “No. But humor me anyway.”
Varian shakes his head, mumbling something about Hugo “not letting it go.” He sighs. “It’s really nothing. There was just a moment— when you called yourself my boyfriend— that I thought maybe you were actually… you know. Jealous.”
Hugo doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t know how to feel. Embarrassed, probably? He should probably be mortified that he was seen through within seconds, even if Varian has convinced himself what he thought wasn’t true.
Upon Hugo’s silence, Varian awkwardly clears his throat. “But o—obviously I know that you aren’t. Jealous, I mean. Like, I know you aren’t jealous because this—“ he gestures between them— “isn’t real. And I— I know that. So, uhm. Yeah. That’s all.”
Hugo nods slowly. “Right. Yeah, I was just… doing my part. That’s all it was.”
“Right!” Varian parrots, laughing nervously. “It was just momentary confusion. Glad to know we’re on the same page.”
Hugo watches the shorter boy fidget with the cuff of his sleeve, refusing to raise his eyes from the dark fabric. It’s probably for the better, Hugo doesn’t know what Varian would see if he looked up at him right now.
Hugo is, for lack of better words, in deep shit.
The more sensible part of him argues that it was selfish to let himself go through with this plan knowing that he will never be satisfied with the limited time he gets to have Varian like this. He will always want more, will always want this to be real, and to indulge in this ruse is to taste what could be.
This is a dangerous game that Hugo can’t afford to lose, but also doesn’t have the strength to win. It’s a game he never should’ve agreed to play in the first place.
But Hugo also firmly believes that there isn’t a single world out there in which Hugo wouldn’t willingly choose to be the fool who plays the game even though the odds are stacked against him. He’ll leave with less than he arrived with. He knows this to be a fact and accepts it.
Because for once in his life, Hugo isn’t playing to win.
“Hey, Hugh?”
Hugo hums in response, immediately turning to the only boy he’s ever fallen for.
Varian reaches for Hugo’s hand, squeezing it lightly. “Thank you,” he says.
“For?”
“Well, everything tonight. But mostly for putting up with my ridiculous plan and playing pretend.”
The words it’s not ridiculous because it’s not pretend, not for me fight to push their way past his lips, to be spoken so he can finally get the weight that is his feelings off his chest.
What he thinks is, I love you.
What he says is, “Anything for you, Varian.”