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It was October 31st, Halloween, marking almost a year exactly since the games.
Almost a year since everyone pussied out after mingle.
Almost a year since he and Nam-gyu had been thrown onto the street practically butt ass naked together.
Almost a year since he moved into Nam-gyu’s place.
Surprisingly, pretty much all the shit that followed left him with a relatively good feeling in his stomach. Frequent gigs, lots of the good clean drugs, somewhere he could call home that wasn’t a complete shithole, a gay ass relationship with his roommate (AKA drug buddy slash old hookup), and no debt. That's what you call fantastic, baby.
Would most people agree? Absolutely not, but it's not like he tried to find a permanent solution (if you know, you know) again, which was a… step up? Especially considering the, you know, murder games. But he was all good, trust.
…
Unrelated however, he was also seeing a therapist which was not super fun, but whatcha gonna do?
Anyway. Halloween was possibly the greatest holiday ever to holiday (in his humble opinion). If he had a better family when he was younger that actually got him lots of free stuff on christmas, maybe that would take the cake, but as a kid free candy? That was the shit , yo!
Not that many people in Korea actually celebrated it, but he guessed there were enough that meant getting some game out of going door to door.
Knocking on doors for free candy soon turned into getting into clubs for free drinks, so yeah. He fucking loved Halloween.
Which brought him to tonight. After a shit ton of convincing, he was able to rope his Nam-su into going out with him to some club hosting an event.
They both were pretty simple men. Someone says ‘club?’, that means free booze and drugs with a possibility of hookup… not that Thanos went for that last part anymore, but the point still stood. They say yes 99% of the time. So why was it so hard for him to get Nam-gyu to come with? Possibly the best part.
Costumes .
Cheesy as shit? Oh yeah. Was he still dressing them up? Hell. Fucking. Yes.
No one was taking his Superman cape away from him.
No one.
…
The costumes weren't even all that bad, not complex in the least, especially compared to the shit Thanos used to put together! Nam-gyu would wear a black Batman T-shirt (originally with the mask, but he argued pretty hard to get that out of the picture for some reason) and he'd wear his Superman tee plus cape… the cape was for creative purposes.
Also he wanted it, so everyone needed to back off his case before he blew a fucking fuse.
Whatever. Nam-gyu stopped his little hissy fit complaining session when he saw how short and tight the superman shirt was anyway, so the walk over was pretty pleasant compared to the grumbly complaining shit talk he'd been prepping himself for… and he was for sure getting laid later.
The club that had the biggest Halloween celebration that Thanos had consistently gone to the last few years was on the road with the big intersection a few streets over, Club HDH. He’d performed there a few times within the last few months, and the bouncer was chill, so they didn't have to wait a fuck ton of time, surrounded by sweaty teens.
Another win for Thanos!
Arguably they were gonna be surrounded by like… thousands of people either way, but it was the idea of skipping lines that really got him going.
And boy was it crowded.
In his experience, the best clubbing nights were usually when the vibes were there, but it wasn't completely packed….
This was completely packed.
But hey! It's not like he had claustrophobia (for the most part). It was fine. Everyone got a little freaked when there was barely any room to move, and it's not like he was gonna be a pussy about the whole thing. Plus it wasn't full blown. Can't expect a rapper not to like crowds.
“Wanna grab some drinks?” He yelled over the music, looking to his right. There was some sort of weird light laser effect projecting from the ceilings and walls, so Nam-gyu’s face was half pink, half green, with star looking freckles glowing. In short, he looked hot as fuck .
“Fuck yes.” He saw his mouth move while his eyes rolled. Thanos breathed out a laugh and grabbed on to his wrist to drag him behind, when all of a sudden he stopped short.
He made sure to wear his contacts, the ones that made his eyes look blue, so he knew for a motherfucking fact what he was looking at.
The pink jumpsuit.
The fuckass mask.
No.
Fucking.
Way.
He wasn't freaked out. He wasn't!
But…
It felt like he forgot how to breathe.
He needed to get them away. He needed to get his Nam-su away. They couldn't take them back. He wouldn't go back, and he wouldn't let them get him either.
If Nam-gyu was saying something, he couldn't hear him over the pounding, and he didn't have any time to look back at him. They needed to get to a less populated area first, and then leave. As soon as possible.
He should’ve fucking known! That old drunk said he'd played the same games before, it probably happened every year, and if he won and went back, who's to say they didn't just take all the old players and fucking recycle them!
It was. The same exact day. One year later.
Pink mask guy was just standing there! People bumping into each other, but they stood still as a rock, probably just staring into his soul.
Or maybe looking for them? Maybe they didn't actually see them.
Yeah.
He slammed the door to the empty VIP room he always got after one of his shows. Security must've been crammed, cause it was way too easy to sneak in.
“Thanos?” He pulled out his phone to call an uber, not even looking up at Nam-gyu.
Wait… maybe not Uber. The app could be intercepted or some shit if they had tech people controlling it. They could just walk the back way. With extra turns. Just in case. At least they didn't know where they lived.
Probably.
For Thanos' sanity, he'd say they didn't.
“We need to go. Like right now.” Straight to the point. He was rarely this serious, so hopefully that got what he was trying to say across.
“What?” His eyebrows were pulled tight together, his lip jutting out, like it always did when he was upset… They did just get there. “Why?”
He pinched his lips together. They didn't have time for this, and the room could be wired. He just remembered that they actually did in fact know shit about them. He wasn't sure how much exactly, but they knew at the bare minimum, birthday, name, debt, and a tiny bit of history. He swallowed harshly, and rubbed his eyes hard. His spiral suddenly was cut off with a, “Are you having a panic attack?”
“What?” Panic attack? No he was panicking a little, but he's pretty sure it was a reasonable amount of panic for the situation. “No! Fuck, didn't you see?”
“See what?” Now it was his turn to pinch his lips. Concern. Written all over his face, plain as day.
“ They were fucking in there!”
“You're– I don't know what you're saying, man. Who? Who was in there?” He didn't think he was slurring, but he didn't really know much of anything right now. He wasn't drunk or high, so maybe it was just a Nam-gyu thing.
“Them! The fucking–” He was gesturing wildly around, but he obviously wasn’t getting what he was trying to say across, so fuck the game people if they were listening. “Pink jumpsuit men, I don't– Fuck! They were in there! I saw one of them!”
Nam-gyu's face turned ghost white quicker than anything he had ever seen. The silence between the both of them shifted when he realized what Thanos’ words meant.
He reached out hesitantly, and whispered with wide eyes, “Are you sure?”
“Yes! I fucking saw them… him? Her? I don’t give a fuck, but just standing. Looking at me.” Fucking creep. If he wasn’t already so freaked out because they knew the circumstances, he probably would’ve gone to another club anyway.
Nam-gyu swallowed. “Okay. I’m gonna– I’ll talk to the bouncer. Stay in here.”
“No.” He looked at him, obviously in disbelief, cause what the fuck, bro? “I'm coming with you.”
“Dude if they're here for both of us, it's better to split. You know?” Isn’t that exactly what they said not to do in all the horror movies? Like yeah sure realistically it made a lot of sense, but if something happened…
He looked at him. His boyfriend (even though they didn’t really put a label on the whole thing). It wasn’t a matter of if he could do it. It was a matter of if they would take him.
But then again, the guard seemed to only notice him, if he actually did at all.
He needed to pray to all the gods he stopped believing in as soon as he left, because, “Yeah, yeah, you're right.” He rubbed his forehead, not sparing even a glance at Nam-gyu. “Just… call me if anything happens.”
Stupid decision? Sure. Absolutely. No doubt about it. But Nam-gyu could handle himself… right?
“Got it.” He swallowed. With a tight smile he shut the door behind himself, leaving Thanos completely alone.
To be so honest, he didn't think much about the games. Like at all. Nam-gyu had ‘bad days’ or whatever he wanted to call them, but for the most part Thanos didn't really acknowledge it himself.
Not to say he ignored it when it was brought up, just that he'd kind of… slide it under the rug. But hey, don't come at him. Call it a coping mechanism.
And he was so much better because of it! Flash of that chick getting shot in front of him? Go edit some music shit. See a fan that looks just a little too much like Gyeong-su? He was gonna get his exercise in for the day and highkey run the fuck away.
‘Oh, Thanos, it's not healthy to bottle up about what's bothering you’. Well Mr. Therapy man, if he started spouting some bullshit about some game where he killed people, he'd definitely be put in some sort of asylum. ‘Why don't you talk to your partner?’ No way. What was he gonna do, cry on his shoulder?
Didn't work like that.
He got sidetracked. The point is. Maybe he should've , because maybe if he had, he could've prepared for whatever hell he was just thrown into.
He felt his phone vibrating in his pocket, saw the contact, and put it to his ear.
“Did you find him?”
He didn't hear a response right away, but just as he was about to ask if he was there, “You still in the room?”
“Yeah.” He chewed on his lip, feeling the blood seep into his mouth and pool under his tongue. Soothing in a way. Kind of fucked, but soothing.
“Alright. Meet me in the front.”
He heard the beep, signaling the call had been disconnected. That someone had hung up... Okay. Nam-gyu hung up on his first which was just a little bit weird.
It was probably fine. Not like a trick, right? He checked the time.
Oh, huh.
He'd been alone for like twenty minutes. God he must've lost track of time.
What if he didn't realize it after an hour, and then Nam-gyu was just… gone.
He needed to focus.
He walked through the crowd again until he could finally breathe in the cool night air. He looked to his right. Nam-gyu was leaning against the metal door smoking.
He watched him inhale and blow the smoke out slowly, before walking towards him. “We're heading back.”
“Wait, why? Did he find him?”
Nam-gyu didn't look him in the eye– actually he didn't even look at him at all.
“We can't talk about this here.”
Right. People would think they were both crazy if they just started talking about this shit in the open. He jerked his head up and down once, before watching Nam-gyu drop the cigarette and crush it with his foot.
•••
The walk back was completely silent. Thanos kept looking to Nam-gyu, but not even a reassuring smile was directed towards him.
Not that he needed to be reassured, but it would've been nice to be acknowledged.
Their apartment was nothing special… pretty much the opposite actually. Best word to describe it would be ‘falling apart’ which was actually two words but just ignore that.
They had one room, a bathroom, a small ass kitchen, and a living room with a tv and a big ass couch that probably cost more than it should've. It was a fantastic couch though. 10/10. Really great.
He didn't take off his shoes, he just walked to the couch and sat. “So?” Nam-gyu didn't sit next to him yet. He just stood in the doorway, not saying anything, not moving, nothing. “What happened?”
After a few seconds he finally seemed to snap out of it, and walked over to him, but didn't sit. He looked to the side before making eye contact. “Dude.” His Adam's apple bobbed. “You're sure you saw the guy. Pink jumpsuit, dark mask with a shape on it?”
“On god, bro. I wouldn't make that shit up.”
“Right.” He let out a breath. Well shit now Thanos was thinking something actually happened out there. “I don't– I know it's hard. Getting over the shit we went through. The nightmares, the, uh, day nightmares–”
Wait.
“What are you trying to say?”
Nam-gyu licked his lips, looking down. He hesitated before finally, “I don't think you saw who you thought you saw.”
Be so fucking real.
“What, are you trying to say I'm crazy? Fuck you, man!” ‘Didn't see who he thought he saw’, seriously? What, he mistook the six-foot masked man who just happened to be wearing the exact thing the game people wore for some other guy? No. He was saying something else, and he wasn't spitting it out. And okay, was this a bit of an overreaction? maybe, but he'd been called crazy way too many times to just take it... especially from someone he cared about. it felt like a knife- a fork was in his stomach.
“No!” Yeah, sure.
“I’m not a fucking schizo!” Mental health rights to all people, but that ain't him. Nothing wrong if someone hallucinates because they're sick. Should they get help? Yeah, fucking obviously, but like, he wasn't gonna shit on them because of it… That being said, drugs didn't fuck with his mind that much, that he was seeing whatever bullshit Nam-gyu was on about.
“I’m not saying you are!”
“That's literally exactly what you're saying.” If this was the shit the bouncer said too, fuck him. He probably did check everyone, or they were wearing a mask, or– fuck him he didn't know, but he was obviously wrong. “I know what I saw, maybe that guy just didn't remember who the hell he let in.”
“We checked the security cameras, Thanos! They weren't. There.” HDH had cameras? Side tangent… that wasn't good. He'd definitely done some shit they could call him in for.
“Maybe they left before you could see him! Todays the fucking day they got all of us, how do you know they weren't grabbing someone el–”
“I saw where you were staring. There wasn't. A guard.”
The club was packed, there was no way Nam-gyu would've been able to pick him out. “It wasn't me.”
“Come on! I was literally right next to you! I can recognize my own head, man, and you were probably the only purple haired freak in the crowd.”
Thanos rubbed his hand over his face, he knew what he saw… right? But Nam-gyu was so sure– So sure that he was wrong. The more he thought about it though, the fuzzier the edges were. The more it didn't quite fit. “I'm not… I'm not crazy.”
“I know you're not.”
“One of them was there.” Because he needed to be right about this.
Nam-gyu looked into his eyes and pinched his lips.
“I see them sometimes too.” He said, barely above a whisper. Thanos stared back at him. Why didn't he– why didn't he tell him?
“You…” His eyebrows furrowed as he looked how he was standing in front of him. “Do?”
“I, uh. I was surprised you hadn’t… not because I thought you would have, but I wound up looking it up.” He paused, squinting. “You’ve heard of PTSD right?”
“I mean, yeah. Not like doctor level shit, but I know it in a Wikipedia rabbit hole level.” Yeah that's right. Wikipedia, bitches. He ate those pages up.
“Right.” Nam-gyu nodded, adding on a small smile as an afterthought… understanding. “So then yeah. It’s whatever you know then I guess, but some people can see shit. Not like shaman gets visions, it’s more of just a flicker. You think you see something for a second that’s not there.”
Well shit. No he didn’t see a flicker or whatever… it might’ve been a bit unclear , he didn’t exactly know considering it was in a club and he started panicking, but it was definitely in front of him for at least like ten seconds. Not a flicker.
“I saw him for longer.” He said, trying not to curl up on himself. This whole conversation just felt like a ‘you're crazy! No actually you're not. I get it! Wait no, you are crazy and I’m sending you to a mental institution tomorrow’ type thing
Quickly Nam-gyu shook his head. “That can happen too.”
Oh.
That was… okay– good! Not great, but yeah. And Nam-gyu was going through the same shit, and he was looking at him with a look that really made it a lot easier to be okay with what was going on.
“So, I’m not crazy?” Now he was smiling a bit, because he wasn't crazy and Nam-gyu was smiling too.
He huffed out a laugh, cautiously… if that made sense. “No, Su-bong. You're not crazy.”
“A win for humanity!” He got up and put his arm over his shoulder. “But it’s nice to know you're just as fucked up as me.” He rested his head on his head, only to be pushed away .
“It’s not fucked up! The games were fucked up, we just have to deal with the shit it gave us.”
He hummed. “Don’t worry my Nam-su, I’d love you even if you were crazy.”
“And I love you even though you are crazy.”
He gasped and put a hand over his heart, mock offended. “Hey!”
“Kidding! Kidding!” He smiled widely. “We'll get through this together, okay?”
Thanos smiled back.
“Yeah. We will.”