Work Text:
Tommy was sprawled out across his bed, lying on his stomach, trying to finish some editing he’d procrastinated. It was due tomorrow, and even though he’d had everything he needed since last week, he couldn’t bring himself to get it done. Although, at this point, he hadn’t actually touched the work in ten minutes. His brain was too wrapped up in a tired, anxious feeling.
Life was just exhausting as of recently. It’s not like it was bad–he had amazing friends, the job of a lifetime, and the perfect boyfriend (who Tommy was working on a proposal for). But for whatever reason, it just felt like his brain was stuck. He couldn’t motivate himself to do anything. Even the gym, what was once his happy place, suddenly felt like a hellscape.
People were starting to notice something was off with him. His friends were checking up on him far more often than usual, and they’d bring him coffee or a smoothie on a long work day. He and Spencer hadn’t been intimate in a month or so, and although he knew Spencer was just trying to be careful and give him space, it didn’t make Tommy feel any better.
But he didn’t know how to advocate for himself. So here he was, nauseous, exhausted, and more than burned-out, without the strength to even explain it.
Spencer appeared in the open doorway, and he leaned against it with that effortless swagger he had about him: hands in his pockets, lips curled into a smirk, and eyes full of a difficult, beautiful kind of admiration.
“How long have you been here?” Tommy asked, looking up from his laptop.
“Five minutes.” Spencer shrugged, crossing to the bed and sitting on the edge of it. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but I think you need to turn it off.”
“It needs to be done tomorrow, Spence. I can’t put it off anymore.” Tommy groans, running a hand through his hair and letting his face fall into his folded arms. He felt Spencer grab the laptop and move his fingers gently across the touchpad, looking through the work.
“You should only have to work on this for, like, ten minutes tomorrow. You’re exhausted.” He laid a reassuring hand on Tommy’s sweating back, and the blonde tensed up beneath the touch. The room was uncomfortably silent for a moment, the air stuffy and making Tommy feel insanely uneasy. He brought a finger to his mouth and started biting the nail. “No, baby, it’s all the way down to the bed. You can’t bite that.” Spencer pulls Tommy to sit upright. “This isn’t about work, is it?”
Tommy stared back at him with dark, hazy eyes. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” He replied. “My brain just doesn’t feel right.” He brought his hands up to his eyes as cold tears began to fall.
“Oh, honey,” Spencer sighed, pulling the man into his lap so Tommy’s back was up against his chest. He wound his arms around his waist and nuzzled into his neck. “You’ve been holding that in for a long time, haven’t you?” Tommy nodded gently in response. “It’s okay. I’ve got you.” As Spencer ran his hands along Tommy’s sides, he found himself able to let go in a way he couldn’t with anyone else. He’d gotten really good at putting walls up his entire life, but Spencer was able to completely knock them down with his warm, calloused touch. “Let’s quiet that brain down, okay?” He instructs, and Tommy relaxes into the command, allowing himself to fully fall back onto Spencer–like a surrender. “That’s it, babe. Nice and floaty for me.” Spencer praises. “Why don’t I go get you something to drink, and then we can lay down and watch a movie. That okay?”
“Mmmh.” Tommy attempted to reply, but it came out something like a whimper–a plea. A sign of submission. He was slipping, and that’s exactly what he knew he needed.
“Good, baby, good job dropping for me. I’ll be right back.” Spencer laid the man down against the pillows, removing himself from the bed. Tommy winced at the loss of contact, curling himself up into a tight ball. “It’s alright.” Spencer gave the blonde’s open hand a squeeze. “One minute, that’s it.” He smiled, then slowly let go of Tommy’s hand and left the room.
The air suddenly felt cooler against Tommy’s skin. He knew Spencer was trying to take good care of him, and that he’d be back quicker than he could realize, but Tommy was just getting used to the feeling of being in his arms. Being all by himself like this made him feel small, like the ceiling was going to collapse on him. Spencer was his forcefield.
“Coming back.” Spencer called from what seemed like the beginning of the hallway, and Tommy sighed, letting his hold against himself loosen a bit. Spencer walked into the doorway, a can of sugar-free rootbeer, Tommy’s favorite, in his hand, and he turned off the overhead light with the other. He saw the innocence and trust in Tommy’s eyes, and absolutely melted. He set the drink down on the redwood nightstand and sat down on the bed, legs up and crossed at the ankles. “See, I told you I’d be back.” He said reassuringly, pulling Tommy close to him so his head laid in his lap.
“Better.” Tommy mumbled.
“I know.” Spencer caressed the man’s cheek, then pressed his thumb against his lips and drew it into his mouth. “There, instead of your nails.” With the other hand, he reached for the remote, pointing it at the tv across the room. “Jurassic Park?” He suggested, and Tommy nodded. “Sounds good.”
All of this made Tommy realize just how well Spencer understood him. When he learned that Tommy coped with subspace, he didn’t run away. He stepped into the role completely, and filled it better than anyone else Tommy could think of. He volunteered to take care of Tommy when he couldn’t take care of himself. And, at this point? Tommy was sure he’d follow Spencer into the sun.
“Just relax.” Spencer whispered. “You don’t have to think right now.” He placed a hand into Tommy’s hair, gently raking his fingers across the scalp. Tommy nuzzled into his thigh in acknowledgement. “Good boy. That’s all you need to be, okay?”
“Mhm.” Tommy hummed around Spencer’s thumb. Between the darkness of the room, the soft coloring of the movie in front of them, and the warm body pressed up against him, Tommy was more than comfortable to just float. He didn’t have any responsibilities, or anything to worry about. Everything he needed was wrapped around him.
“I love you, Tommy.”
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When the movie finishes, Spencer grabs the remote slowly, not sure if Tommy was asleep yet or not. He’d been awfully quiet–but, then again, that was pretty normal for him when he’s in this state. Spencer turns off the TV, returning the black remote to its place. Tommy stirred on top of him, breathing sharply through his nose.
“Woke you up?”
“Yeah.”
“‘M sorry. Let me–I’m gonna sleep, too.” Spencer lifts up Tommy’s head, allowing himself to sneak under the covers. Tommy flips himself over, curling into the shorter man’s side and resting his head on his chest. Even in the darkness, Spencer can still make out the silhouette of Tommy’s adoring smile and full eyes.
“Thank you for doing that for me.” He whispered into Spencer’s black t-shirt. “I’m bad at recognizing when I need that… dunno if you can tell.” He explains, laughing to himself.
“You don’t have to thank me,” Spencer presses a kiss into Tommy’s blonde hair, “you’re my boyfriend. It’s literally my duty to take care of you.”
“Haha. Doo-ty.”
“I was trying to be sweet!” Spencer protested.
“You’re very sweet, Spence.” Tommy tapped the man’s chest in reassurance. “You’re very sweet, and also know that was funny.”
“I suppose.” He squeezed Tommy a little tighter. “Goodnight.”
“Pancakes tomorrow. Goodnight.”