Chapter Text
Chapter one
I can’t cry. Crying would be grief, grieving would mean he won’t come back. Missing him would be silly, he will return. He will come back to me, right?
But.
But what if in the time he’s pricing his soul back together he realizes I’m not worth it?
What have I ever done for him? Saving his life once, that’s nothing special. Truth be told, I’m nothing special.
I clutch the ring around my neck.
I open my eyes to spots in my vision from the pressure, but no crimson robes to be seen. No tinkling of chains to be heard. No…
I stand and grab the broom, walking through the doorway to the yard. I should keep the shrine in good shape, in thanks to the villagers who helped rebuild.
And.
And just in case he comes here first.
Ah, a maple leaf falls in my vision, the first of the season. The last time the leaves were changing, we were together.
🏮
I stir a full pot at the stove, generously adding vegetables as it simmers. An incense later its ready, a strong smell thickens the air. Not half bad! I reach for bowls and set the table.
As I finish plating the food a knock sounds from the door.
My eyes widen and swell.
“San la-“
As I fling open the door,
“Dianxia,” a warm voice greets me.
I am met with tanned skin, a messy bun, and worried eyes.
Not…
“Ah, Feng Xin!” I rub the corners of my eyes, dismissing the tears that had yet to fall, embarrassed.
“Come in, come in! What are you doing here,” I ask as he follows me inside.
“I just wanted to check in on- oh are you dining with someone? I can leave.”
My brow furrows, not following what he means.
“What makes you think that?”
He gestures to the table that I set.
“Ah.”
I had set the table for two without realizing. I’d grown so used to-
“Oh… that, huh, must have been muscle memory.”
He gives me a pitying look and my face reddens as my hands unconsciously finds the crystal ring.
“Nonetheless, you’re here now so it’s for you. Sit, sit, sit.”
Feng Xin’s face turns a mottled shade of purple and before he can even touch the seat he bounces right back up. “Did…you make this?”
“Mhm! It’s a new recipe I’ve been working on-“
When I look up Feng Xin is already out the door “Sorry Dianxia, turns out I… have to go!”
“Ah okay but before you go, have you seen the Lord Wind Master?” I call from the doorway
Feng Xin turns over his shoulder to yell back,
“Sorry your highness, I haven’t! But I’ll ask Ling wen!”
“Much appreciated!”
With Feng Xin’s sudden departure I am left, once again… alone.
It really is odd to have to relearn how to be alone. I’ve lived a solitary for so long but company for just a little while wrecks my whole system. I sigh, walking back into the shrine as the sun sets.