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The accommodations at The Nectar Springs were spectacular, without a doubt. Were he human, Sebastian imagined he would be entranced by the chance to share in the luxury he aimed to provide to his master. Sebastian still inwardly balked at the concept of a servant rooming in a suite immediately next to one’s master in such a manner, but…
He was no ordinary servant and no human longing for a taste of the gilded finish his master received in his daily life.
In this hotel, they had to be on high alert.
Even the concept of that small distance, a wall away, made him uneasy.
They’d retreated to their rooms after their meal and night of gathering more intel, pieces of a puzzle they still couldn’t discern the subject of. Sebastian helped Ciel shrug out of his dinner jacket, reverting to the familiarity of his role. “I presume you’ll be taking a bath, my lord?”
“Yes. I won’t need assistance, so I’m told.” Ciel nodded to Sebastian. “You should clean up too. It’ll be odd if you don’t seem to occupy your room.”
“Hm. I suppose you’re right.”
Ciel smirked. “Don’t tell me you’re jealous of an automated bath, Sebastian.”
“I only wish to alleviate my boredom, sir.” Sebastian hung his dinner jacket on a hanger, reluctantly resigned to take it to his own room. “The only enjoyable part of dinner was chatting with you.”
Ciel stared. “Oh?”
“The rest of high society is quite dull, my lord, and human food does not nourish me.” Sebastian gave Ciel a sultry smirk. “Seeing you dressed finely as a young gentleman and taken so well by onlookers made me feel proud of my true tastes. You are all that interests me- even if you are a brat.”
The tease was tacked on, but Ciel took it in stride with a laugh.
“Ha, you must be bored out of your mind to flatter me so.” Ciel let Sebastian unbutton his shirt. “This place is getting to you. We’ll start poking around some of the less publicly available areas tomorrow; I can’t have you getting so stir-crazy that you start having tea with me by choice.”
What once would have been a standard jest between them, with the truth that the two didn’t generally spend true leisure time together, made Sebastian’s chest tighten. Dining or taking tea with Ciel had been far from unpleasant. Sipping what amounted to little more than hot water to him as the price for being treated as his lord’s guest rather than his butler had been refreshing. He’d truly begun to enjoy spending time with him. Although he couldn’t say for certain how many months, potentially even creeping into years, it had been, his fondness for his master was genuine. Ciel’s dismissal of that, or perhaps a light way of rejecting him, stung in a way he hadn’t anticipated.
Sebastian replied automatically. “Very good, sir.”
Turning away, Sebastian made for his own suite and bath. The dejected misery he found himself in was at odds with the fragrant bubbles and deep tub, which could submerge him entirely. His senses were trained on his master’s well-being in the other bathroom, relieved yet disappointed that his master gave so sign of needing him.
In the other bathroom, Ciel sulked in the tub. It was true that the bath filled with hot water in no time and the fine soaps and oils soothed his skin, but he missed Sebastian’s dutiful scrubbing of his back and massaging of shampoo into his hair. Bathing alone was not what it cracked up to be, even if he took a few extra minutes to soak. Those few extra minutes were spent staring at the ceiling, considering calling for Sebastian, but stubbornly deciding to get out on his own anyway.
Ciel had gotten too used to Sebastian’s constant presence, he supposed. It was becoming more natural to do everything with him, the barrier between master and servant eroding— but he shouldn't forget that Sebastian was used to his relative freedom. Even when they'd had the manor to themselves, Sebastian only interacted with him on business.
The lull into familiarity was dangerous, should he forget that Sebastian didn't really want to be around him if he didn't need to be, and his earlier statement was less a compliment to Ciel and an insult to their fellow guests.
Ciel was downcast as he got out of the bath and toweled himself off. It was impossible to appreciate any of the finery he was treated to while he was so preoccupied with his own loneliness and how his sole companion had no reason to feel the same way or reciprocate socially in a way that wasn’t just duty. Sebastian wasn't human, and that was that.
For all he'd been through, he couldn’t believe something so minor could bother him.
He opened the door into his room, bundled in a heavenly soft hotel robe. Ciel paused, surprised to see the very being who was prowling his thoughts seated on his couch, also in a robe. “Is there a problem?” asked Ciel.
Sebastian looked up at him. “Somewhat. I have a concern about our sleeping arrangements.”
“You seemed upset that we were roomed too closely.” Ciel remained aloof as he pulled his robe tighter around himself. The last thing he wanted was to show that the disdain at their proximity hurt him in any way.
“Hmm, I was surprised that the hotel would house all of their noble guests and servants in such a manner, but my concern is the opposite. Although it's only the other side of the wall, it makes me uneasy to leave you in here alone while we still don't know the details of this place.”
Ciel blinked as he processed what Sebastian was implying. For some reason, it made his chest feel warm. “You’d like to stay here instead?”
Sebastian nodded, not meeting Ciel’s eyes. “I can’t force you to be okay with the intrusion, but I think it’s the wisest option.”
How could he think that? “It isn’t an intrusion." Ciel’s cheeks were warming up too, right as Sebastian decided to look at him again. “I thought it obvious that I’ve always slept better with your presence near me.”
“Yes, but I’ve felt as though I’ve perhaps treaded on the bounds of what a servant ought to be. I wouldn’t want to force you to accommodate my presence more than necessary.” Sebastian always seemed composed, but Ciel could sense him withholding something from him.
“What? No!” Ciel’s slighted feelings came out louder than he’d intended, but he’d rather seem loud than hurt. “We’ve been each other’s only companion on this trip, but it’s been you I keep reminding myself to not be too close to! I don’t want to be another chore, not more than I already am to you, so I’ve always assumed you hated idle chit-chat or being near me when the contract didn’t require your service! How could you think I’m the reason why we aren’t closer? What reason do you have to care?!”
Sebastian flinched. He narrowed his eyes as he stood up. “Master, where did you get that idea? You were clear about my intended role, that I am not permitted to walk alongside you, address you in a familiar way, or many other things of the sort. That we had tea together was a pleasant surprise, although now you’re grinding on my nerves by forgetting all of your rules which you imposed upon me. Have you forgotten how much I do that you do not require, never once occurring to you that I enjoy this life with you?!”
It was the closest they’d ever had to an argument purely about emotions, what was clear but unsaid between them.
Ciel hugged his arms to his chest, heart pounding as he and Sebastian slowly reached the same conclusions with similar disbelief.
He felt small, but the knot in his stomach was slowly untying itself. Ciel shifted awkwardly on his feet. “We have certain appearances to keep up, but this time together lately… has been nice.”
“I agree,” said Sebastian quietly.
Their eyes met and Sebastian bit his lip. Ciel’s shoulders shook.
The two burst into laughter at once, the tension shattered.
“You idiot!” exclaimed Ciel. How many times had they plotted and schemed the most elaborate ruses together, their minds sharpening the other? How many times had Sebastian caught him and saved him, earning Ciel’s trust over and over again? Their existences revolved around each other, how could Sebastian not see it? “After all we’ve been though, there’s no one closer to me than you!”
“Yes, that’s true,” admitted Sebastian, smug and proud. He sobered up quickly. “You hold the world at arm’s length, master. I was generally included in this treatment. For that to have changed… it pleases me a great deal.”
Ciel’s expression softened. “It’s not like this only happened within the last week, Sebastian.”
Sebastian inclined his head, lips upturned with a hint of a smile. “I know.”
All the other wanted was to be allowed to be closer.
Old habits were the most comfortable.
“Help me get ready for bed,” said Ciel.
“Of course, my lord.”
He didn’t need help to get out of his robe and into the provided nightshirt, but Sebastian was quick to assist him, attentive as always. Sebastian’s gentle touch was more of a comfort than Ciel let on, but he wouldn’t say it outright.
“Taking a bath alone is miserable,” complained Ciel as Sebastian finished buttoning his shirt. “I expect you to attend to me next time.”
“Oh? You’re most picky, master.” Sebastian looked up at him from where he knelt, grinning. “Is soaking in a bubble bath too taxing for you?”
“Oi!” Ciel blushed brightly. “I’m trying to give you a compliment! Something to do next time, since you’re so easily bored!”
Sebastian chuckled. “Yes, I understand. You’re too fun to tease, young master. At least it seems your hair is nice and clean.”
Ciel ran a hand through his still damp hair. “You’re perfect at everything, so of course you do a better job.”
“Only because I learned it for you.”
The affection in Sebastian’s voice took Ciel by surprise.
“We’re both stupid, aren’t we?” asked Ciel.
“Hm.” Sebastian stood up and flipped the covers open on the bed for him. “We can argue about who’s worse tomorrow.”
Ciel smiled, shaking his head to himself as he crawled into bed. The hotel bed was huge and just as soft as it promised to be. He had a ready-made nest of the highest quality pillows and bedding to burrow into, but some part of him that he was ashamed of didn’t want to be in it alone.
“Sebastian?”
“Yes, master?”
Ciel swallowed, feeling shy despite their exchange prior. There should have been more ease between them, but perhaps he still felt nervous because of and not in spite of his outburst. Was it so odd that the two of them had gotten close and mutually enjoyed the other’s company?
“If you want to protect me, isn’t it easier to do so if you’re in here with me?”
Sebastian stared. “In bed?”
Ciel’s deflection flared up again. He closed his eyes. “Where else? Forget it.”
“No, no- I agree with your tactical line of thinking.”
Relief flooded Ciel. Sebastian was amicable enough to still play along.
Sebastian changed from a robe to a nightshirt with lightning speed, letting himself under the covers seconds later. Ciel figured that would be all, already feeling safe with Sebastian by him, but Sebastian outdid himself again. Ciel opened his eyes at motion quite near him to find Sebastian intimately close. “Hm?” he asked. “The bed is maybe even bigger than my parents’ bed. You can have the other half of it.”
“Ah, but this is to protect you, is it not?”
Sebastian gently took Ciel in his arms, holding him close enough that their heads ended up on the same pillow. “If I am your sword and shield," continued Sebastian, “It makes the most sense to protect you with my body.”
He had a point, but it made Ciel smirk.
“I see. You’re clingy.”
Even as Ciel accused Sebastian of being clingy, he snuggled up to Sebastian, fitting himself against him and hugging him. Sebastian huffed. “I think I’m not the only one.”
“I remember after I was sick in Germany.” Ciel’s eyes flickered up to Sebastian’s face, eager to play. “You went a couple days without being able to touch me, and then you couldn’t keep your hands off of me.”
“Hm. Those were dire circumstances. I couldn’t take any risks,” replied Sebastian, tone light as he slowly rubbed Ciel’s upper back.
“And now? Are you scared someone will take me away from you?”
Ciel had meant it as a tease, but Sebastian held him slightly tighter.
“They’ve tried. I’ve had the occasional lapse in my judgement which I cannot overlook. You were harmed at the music hall without my initial knowledge, and there have been times where I’ve been nearly too late.” Sebastian pressed his nose into Ciel’s hair, breathing deeply, calming himself. “I won’t let anyone steal you away. I promise.”
“I know.” Ciel felt perfectly safe and comfortable, yawning and letting himself completely relax in Sebastian’s arms. “For now, you make an excellent pillow.”
“Given the calibre of my competition, I’m flattered.”
Ciel drifted to sleep with a hint of a smile on his face, knowing Sebastian would keep watch. It felt natural to be wound against him, kept sheltered from the outside world even in his dreams, which were peaceful, for once.
Sebastian dozed with his nose in his precious lord’s hair, making a mental note to steal the hotel’s shampoo on their way out in addition to whatever other havoc they may wreak.
The mere thought of anything or anyone coming between them made Sebastian seethe. The outline of Sebastian’s form blurred as a few shadows radiated from him, lengthening only to wrap around Ciel’s resting form, holding him and encasing him in Sebastian’s protection even further. Sebastian barely held back a growl low in his throat, eyes flickering red as the most potent emotion he had for his lord thrummed within him.
No one would take Ciel away from him.
The next thing that dared try would regret being born.