Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Stan really didn't want to go.

As child he had always hated the Marsh family barbacue. It didn't used to be a proper family reunion anyway, his father had fought with almost every living relative they had to the point that they made their own get-together and excluded them.

I can't even blame them.

But ever since his mom divorced that jerk around seven years ago, she had been trying to reconcile with his father's side of the family. Insisting that it was important to keep in contact with your close relatives. Turns out that most of them really liked Sharon, they just hated Randy. So despite his mom changing her last name back to Kern, she still kept in contact with the Marsh family.

They basically kicked Randy out of his own family.

Well deserved.

After a couple of years of negotiations, Stan's mom conviced them to host this year's family reunion in her house. She even got the Tucker's to come.

The Tucker's hadn't come to a family gathering even before Stan was born. His father—who else?—made a fuss when his sister, Craig's mom, got engaged to Thomas. So they cut contact with the entire family for years.

Stan hadn't even known Craig was his cousin until his mom told him when he started elementary—he did see the similitude though.

So basically this year wasn't gonna be like the depressing barbacues of his childhood where Stan got remided that everyone hated them, his father got drunk out of his ass, Shelley ditched them to be with her boyfriend and his mom cried softly in the bathroom.

This year his entire family would be there. Family he hadn't seen since he was little, where he would be bombarded with questions, them judging him about his life, his work, Kyle.

Stan was starting to prefer the depressing one.

No—happy thoughts Stan. Remember what the therapist told you.

His mom was thrilled about meeting the whole family again. She had been kinda lonely—especially after Shelley and Stan moved out.

He would get to see his grandparents again. Stan hadn't seen his grandpa for a while, and it would be the first time he saw his grandma in a long while.

Besides, Kyle would be there for him the entire time. Keeping him company, as always.

Stan would be fine. Either way he promised his mom, he couldn't leave her hanging now.

"Stan, are you done brooding in front of the mirror or—oh baby, you're not wearing that," Kyle said walking inside his room. It wasn't a question, it was a statement.

Stan looked at his reflection. He was aware that he wasn't as fashionable as his boyfriend, but he didn't see anything wrong with his outfit.

"What's wrong? I'm clothed, that should be enough."

"Well it's not. You're wearing basketball shorts, for the love of god," Kyle stressed.

"It's what I always wear," Stan defended.

Kyle was very aware. He had been trying to change Stan's wardrobe for ages. Although he didn't really like his boyfriend's gothic phase he had in elementary, Kyle had to admit that he at least had a interesting sense of style.

"I know," Kyle deadpaned. "So I will not let you go like that to your family reunion." 

He opened Stan's closet, going through all his clothes.

"It's a barbacue, Kyle."

"It's a family gathering, that Sharon is very thrilled about." Kyle pulled out a dark red shirt. "We're not wearing suit and tie, but we are going to arrive presentable."

What bothered the redhead quite a bit is that Stanley fully had the ability to dress as if he weren't Adam Sandler. In elementary he had more of a sporty look due to being in the football team, then starting middle school after he got burned out—because of Randy—and embraced his artistic side, he leaned into a more grunge style choice—which led him and his friends to tease him by calling him 'emo'.

However, due to the brunette's declining mental health, him stubbornly favouring the well being of others while denaying his own and his shitty family situation all through his entire childhood, he ended up having a meltdown. Stan had been going to a therapist for a couple of years now (truly, almost all of them were) but he still struggled with some basic task to take care of himself.

Stan always complained that Kyle forgets to eat, but he forgot to add the part where he only made food for Kyle and not for himself, so the alien each time had to force him to share the meal with him.

"Wait, you've been talking to my mom?" Stan questioned dumbfounded.

"Well, yeah," Kyle answered, like it was obvious. "She's nicer than mine, and worries about us both." Then he smirked. "And she asks me if you eat your veggies."

He threw a pillow to his snickering boyfriend.

After a while of Kyle rumaging his clothes, and going back to his room to get a couple of things. He tossed them on top of Stan, who was lying on his bed, distractedly watching his redheaded beauty move around.

"Put that on, and stop looking at my ass."

"Stop having a nice ass," Stan countered.

Kyle sputtered and flushed. The bright red a stark contrast against his pale skin. "Shut up, dumbass."

God, how I love that man.

In the end Stan put on what Kyle gave him. Nothing too over the top, dark red shirt, black tee, black jeans and some nice but comfortable shoes. His boyfriend even gave him some of his own accesories.

"See," Kyle placed him on front of the mirror, hugging him from behind. "You look hot now."

"We're gonna have to see my entire extended family," Stan pouted.

"That's kinda the point of a family reunion," he joked.

"Don't be a smart-ass."

"We're gonna be fine, dummy," Kyle assured him. "We'll get there, we'll say hello, we'll eat some probably badly cooked hamburguers and we can leave as soon as we meet our quota if you want."

"... I thought we were going to sleep in my mom's house?"

"Yeah, but we don't have to stay in the party. We could go take a walk, go to the mall, buy some flowers and visit Chef, and see some places we haven't in a while."

Stan stays slient for a moment, taking advantage of their positions to tilt his head into the crook of his boyfriend's neck, breathing deeply. "Sounds cool, sunshine."

"Now, before we go, you have to promise me something, babe," Kyle softly moved Stan's face so he could catch his eyes. "Don't fight with Craig."

Godammit, I also have to deal with Craig.

He and his cousin didn't used to get the best along as kids. It wasn't until Stan's parents divorced and their mothers became friends that he interacted more with Craig. Turns out Craig wasn't that bad it's just that he was very autistic and will say anything that crosses his mind—kinda like Kyle—, and his tone didn't help much either.

Currently, they got along pretty well, sharing a couple of interests like music. His cousin had also showed Stan pretty cool things about space. The only issue was that they were both very stubborn and jerks, so they clashed a lot for basically anything. 

"Kyle, I'm not a child-"

"Stanley, you're always arguing and fighting for petty reasons. You have to promise me to behave in your mom's party. You can kill each other as much as you guys want after it, don't be an idiot."

He couldn't help but think of his father. How many times he had wished that the earth would shallow him everytime Randy did something stupid in public, like when he went on public television. Stan remembered how embarassed his mom looked when Randy fought with strangers. How she cried in her room the nights his father was arrested for indecent exposure.

Stanley didn't want to be like that. He got close to it, when he had trouble with alcohol, but he had stopped long ago. It was enough that the elderly of South Park constantly reminded him how similar he looked like his father, he didn't want to also behave like him. He couldn't do that to Kyle.

"Okay, I won't tease or prank him. I swear," Stan huffed. "But he has to do the same."

"No worries, Tweek has it handled. You know Craig can't say no to him," Kyle laughed. Then he tightened the hug, soothing Stan's anxieties with his touch and his comforting voice. "We're gonna have a great time, everyone will see how good you're doing, how cool you are and how smart and gorgeous your boyfriend is."

That got a laugh out of Stan. "And if I behave will I get a reward like the good boy I am?" Stan teased, tilting his head backwards to see Kyle.

Tall bastard.

Kyle chuckled and kissed his temple. "We'll see."

He blushed, hard. Kyle wasn't one to return the flirting he threw at him, he was easily flustered—especially in public—that's why Stan loved to tease him.

The brunette turned, grabbed Kyle's hand and raised himself a bit on his tippy toes to kiss him. "C'mon firefly, we have a barbacue to attend to," he said leading Kyle out of his room.

"Will you be this mushy in public too?" his boyfriend joked.

"Dude, and become like Craig and Tweek?"

"I CAN HEAR YOU!" Craig yelled across the hall.

"HEAR ME ALL YOU WANT, FART-FACE!" Stan yelled back.

Kyle and Tweek locked eyes and sighed. It was gonna be a long day.

Chapter Text

Craig didn't wanna go.

His family had always been quite small, just his parents, Tricia and whenever his grandma came to visit. They've never had the necessity of big gatherings since his dad's family lived far away and his mom's family, apparently, were assholes.

If he was honest, he didn't really care as a kid, he was happy with his family, whatever number of Stripe he was on and Tweek.

So color him surprised when he was told at the start of elementary that he was related to Randy fucking Marsh, public nuisance, local drunkward and somehow also his uncle. That meant that Stan Marsh was his cousin and that Craig Tucker was related to, probably, the worst family of South Park—and in this town that's saying a lot.

He had never been told the entire story of why his mom didn't talk to them anymore—though she didn't need to, just the mention of Randy was enough.

Ever since aunt Sharon divorced that pathetic excuse of a functional human being, a bunch of years ago now, she had been thriving, having the opportunity to socialize more and pick up a few new hobbies.

She had also made a point in reconecting with Craig's mom, Laura. Because they both used to get along pretty well before Randy freaked out due to his parents engagement and forbid his wife from talking to his mom.

Craig did actually quite like his aunt, she was nice and made some killer cookies, and once you got to actually know Stan he wasn't that bad, he was just severaly depressed because of that asshole.

That year Sharon had been thrilled because after some years of negotiations she conviced the extended Marsh family to celebrate the yearly family barbacue in her house. And she got Laura to agree to go too.

He wasn't the most thrilled about having to meet a bunch of people who were supposedly related to him. They would ask him a bunch of stupid questions he wasn't interested in answering and he had to pretend to be respectful.

Craig was also worried about Tweek getting anxious with that many people around. But he insisted in acompanying him and he couldn't just not show up, both his mom and his aunt were far too excited for him to make some bullshit up to ditch the party.

Maybe Tweek is right and I've been getting soft over the years.

"CRAIG! Are you sure we have everything ready-ack!?"

Tweek had been freaking out, as usual, over the past hour about their lugage. Even though they had prepared it a week ago, with a check list and rechecked it every day.

"Honey, you've been doing and undoing your bag for an hour. Everything is in there, I promise."

"But what if it's not!?" Tweek retorted.

"Then we deal with it, nothing has to be perfect all the time."

That was a big ol' lie. Craig was a control freak, he was just way better at masking it than Kyle. He was the one who made the checklists, packed a week before and made sure everything was perfect every night, just in case.

His precious boyfriend Tweek, ironically, was an absolute mess, a professional procrastinator and only worried about everything being ready twenty minutes before they had to leave.

Craig aproached his twitching boyfriend. He circled his arms around him and placed his chin on his shoulder, aplying just enough pressure to ground but not overwhelm the blonde.

"Remember to breathe," Craig guided him through some short breathing exercises, when Tweek's breathing slowed considerably he let go. "I can grab my checklist and we can recheck everything if you want."

"...no, I trust you. I-I'm sorry," Tweek tried.

"You don't have to be sorry coffee-cake, it happens and we get through it. You're doing so good," he reassured Tweek, who leaned on Craig's chest, seeking for support.

Tweek had improved a lot since he left his parents house. Craig had been helping him even before that— starting with being the only one allowed to make him coffee—but it wasn't until he left that house for good that he truly started getting better.

Quitting drinking whatever was that thing Tweek's father gave him was the first big change. Craig didn't know what was in it but he wouldn't be surprised it was part of the cause half of South Park was... the way it was.

Stupid as rocks. No—scratch that, that's an insult to the poor rocks.

"Okay, do we need to do something else?" Tweek asked, visibly more relaxed, manually managing his deep breaths.

"While we wait for those other two to be ready, we can run over the programming of today."

Craig slowly pulled his boyfriend down with him into his bed, staring up at the constellations he recreated on the ceiling with those glow in the dark stars.

He wouldn't lie and say that being in a relationship with Tweek had been easy, but they made it work and it was every second worth it.

He was kinda secretly jealous of Stan and Kyle, those fuckers somehow always knew what the other was feeling and what was needed, like they had some sort of mental connection or some shit.

I know Stan has a weird connection with Kyle that Kenny loves to joke about. But can Kyle use his alien powers to read his boyfriend's mind?

Despite Craig and Tweek being together for longer, they didn't know each other for as long as Stan and Kyle had. They still struggled sometimes with communication and what the other needed in a moment of distress.

Over the years they had developed systems and routines to handle better their unique quirks. 

Craig needed to constantly have control and everything had to be organised, however Tweek thrived in chaos and had issues with sticking to a schedule. So they made their own personal zones where their system wouldn't be disrupted.

In one of the corners of Craig's tidy, space-themed room, was a yellow bean bag with clothes strewn on top and, for some reason, a couple of Lego bricks. With a small table that Craig keeps bumping into and on the wall next to it a corkboard with asymmetrically placed photos and doodles.

In between the half-finished projects in Tweek's room there was a couple of neatly folded deep blue blankets on the floor as a makeshift futon with comfy star shaped pillows. Beside it was a very low bookcase, filled with both astronomy books and comics, it also served as a surface where Craig left his notebooks and a framed photo of them together. It was a stark difference compared to the chaos riddled room, where Tweek swore he had a system to know where anything was.

These little spaces were a nice touch to allow the other to exist in their surroundings but without dissaranging the pre-existing harmony.

They also had established routines to remember doing basic things like eating, showering, brushing their teeth, socializing, etc. Doing their respective chores in the compound—Wendy was very strict with those, they couldn't affort to forget them. And also self-care, like resting, cuddling and playing. All of them accompanied with a reward system that kept them motivated.

All of these measures helped them both cohabit together but also improve their non-existent healthy habits.

Tweek tugged at his sleeves, trying to recall the program Craig had drilled into him all week. “Okay… so, we'll arrive at South Park around noon. Drop our stuff at your parents’ place, then swing by mine for a quick visit. Afternoon barbecue at your aunt’s. And—uh—when Kyle starts, y’know, sneaking for the door, that’s our cue we’ve hit the social quota and can bail.” He hesitated. “Did I… forget something?”

"No, you pretty much got it all, my star," congratulated Craig, adding a soft peck to his temple.

As a child, Craig had always been know as an emotionless jerk. He was a pretty closed off kid and mostly kept it to himself, not caring about what people outside of his circle said about him.

In elementary he only had Clyde, Tolkien and Jimmy as friends, Tweek joining a bit later.

After that stupid fight they made me do.

Once you actually got to know him you saw that he was actually quite passionate and vocal about his interests, he just really only showed it to his closest friends.

He also struggled to express his feelings and didn't have a filter, further pushing the label and making difficult to make new friends. Not that he needed more, he used to be set with the four he had.

It wasn't until he started dating Tweek and he saw how much his attitude afected him, that Craig realised something had to change. He made a point to try and be more sincere about his emotions, showing his boyfriend how much he loved him and how proud he was of him every chance he could.

"But remember, when we go see your parents we'll only stay a short time since we have stuff to do. Don't let them pressure you into doing something you don't want to do."

"I know, babe. Still it's-uh-it's nice to know you'll be there..." He could feel the second Tweak tensed, then he suddendly turned, laying on his stomatch on top of Craig.  "YOU WILL, WOULDN'T YOU-GAHH!?"

Craig gently held Tweek's hands, knowing he would try to pull his hair. "Of course I will. I would never leave you alone like that."

Specially not with them alone.

"Okay," Tweak answered breathless. "Okay, I'm sorry."

"Do you want-"

"I-I swear if you ask me if I want the fucking Fidget Spinner, I WILL throw it at your face."

He chuckled at that, Tweek was so cute when he got pissy. It was also very useful to get him out of whatever funk he was in sometimes.

Then, Tweek straightened up, sitting on his boyfriend's stomach, voice getting a bit serious. "Hey. I-mh-have to ask you a favor... it's pretty important. So please, would mind not... fight with Stan during the barbacue?"

Ah, surprised that didn't come out sooner. I thought it would be Kyle, though, that bitch knows what'll work with me.

As mentioned prior, Craig didn't hate his cousin or anything—at least not anymore. He was quite chill and cool to hang around. Craig enjoyed playing videogames with him and having someone else to infodump about space that weren't Tweek or Kyle.

However, Stan was a hypocrite self-righteous and self-sacrificial dumbass, it wasn't his fault that he couldn't take his constructive criticism. Besides, it was so funny to piss off his cousin, he just couldn't resist—serves him right for all those pranks he liked to pull on him.

But Craig was aware that once they started fighting they wouldn't stop their petty charade until they were satisfied, so it was best to try and have a truce until the party ended.

"Ok, honey," Craig relented. "I will not tell him anything even if he does something stupid—"

"Craig—"

"Ok, ok, fine. But he has to do the same, I won't be tolerating him the entire day."

"I doubt he'll do something," The blonde mused. "Kyle already warned him and I don't think he would like to anger him. And I recomend you to do the same."

"Oh? You fear our resident alien will give us a lecture?" Craig snickered.

"No," Tweek answered, the room got a couple of degrees colder. "If you make a scene in your aunt's barbacue in front of your entire family with me there, you'll have more things to worry about than Kyle getting mad. Don't test me, honey."

It was moments like these when Craig learned new things about himself.

"...okay."

"Great!" Tweek climbed down of the bed. "Since we already gave Stripe to Wendy and the rest of our lugage is in the garage, we are ready to leave."

And with that his beautifully scary boyfriend picked up his bag and left the room, taking only a second to glance back, making Craig get up quickly to follow him.

A few rooms over the other couple were also coming out of Stan's room. From the sound of it they were bickering about something.

"—and become like Craig and Tweek?"

That bitch.

"I CAN HEAR YOU!" he yelled across the hall.

"HEAR ME ALL YOU WANT, FART-FACE!" his idiotic cousin yelled back.

Tweek could only look at Kyle and sigh. Tweek had the feeling it was gonna be an interesting day, for better or worse.