Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Ateez lay on the floor of the practice room, absolutely exhausted out of their minds and way past the point of caring about how dirty the floor was (Seonghwa would complain later, but later was later). Chests heaving, no one spoke for a full minute--which never happened--as they all tried to catch their breaths and rid themselves of the disgusting feeling of sweat pouring down their bodies.

Finally, Jongho, bless his soul, found the strength to actually get up off the floor and stumble over to where the group’s water bottles were, right next to the black speakers (tantalizingly close, if you asked any of the other members). Grabbing a bottle for himself, he first drank a few hearty gulps before getting the other members their well-deserved fluids as well.

“You’re a godsend, Jongho-yah,” Wooyoung panted, grabbing his water gratefully and practically chugging it, not caring about the small stream of water that escaped and started running down the corner of his mouth. The other members, too tired to voice their own opinions at the moment, simply vocalized their agreements through various different hums or nods (or slapping the ground, for whatever reason).

“Wooyoungie, slow down,” Hongjoong warned, though it was lacking the usual bite his orders usually held as he could actually understand the desperate need for water Wooyoung was experiencing. He had taken small sips of his water, bit by bit, as he didn’t want to get sick later, however torturous for his body it was.

He pushed his body into a sitting position, pausing as black spots invaded his vision like a swarm of insects. He blinked rapidly, looking around in bewilderment as he shook his head to try and clear the spots away. They faded after a couple of moments, but the lingering feeling of dread didn’t leave Hongjoong.

He must be just really tired, he decided, taking another big swig of water and almost emptying the clear bottle. For the next couple of minutes, he simply remained in that seated position, legs crossed in front of him, and observed his other members fondly.

Seonghwa was wiping the sweat from his brow, glancing around dazedly as he forced his body up to stand and lean against the mirror and chug more fluids.

Yunho, Yeosang, and Jongho were going through cool-down exercises that Hongjoong most definitely did not have the energy for, standing up to do toe-touches and arm circles.

Mingi and Wooyoung were chatting mindlessly, pausing every now and then to gulp down more water or fan themselves (actually, Wooyoung was doing most of the talking, as he tended to do, and Mingi was simply nodding along to whatever he said, not looking like he was actually taking in any information at all).

About a minute into his quiet observations, San started belting out song lyrics for whatever random reason at a volume much too high for someone who just finished a three-hour dance practice and was lying on the floor looking dead just minutes ago. Overall, all of it was quite normal stuff for Ateez.

With an internal sigh, Hongjoong decided that yes, now was the time to actually muster up the energy to get his legs underneath him to prop himself up and stand up.

He braced his hands on the floor, scooting his feet back underneath his body, and propelled himself upwards.

And--woah . That was not how the world was supposed to look, was it?

Hongjoong’s vision turned blurred and spotty as he felt himself tip sideways, only managing to force out a weak, “Seong-" before his body fell to the side and everything turned dark.

~*~

Seonghwa watched as Hongjoong prepared to haul himself up onto his feet, absentmindedly waiting for the captain so he could wander over to him and talk about something to take his focus off the disgusting sweat he could feel rolling down his back.

Yet, the closer Seonghwa looked, the more off Hongjoong seemed. Sure, it was really just the little things; his eyes were just the slightest bit unfocused, his skin just a few shades paler than usual, his hands trembling just a bit more than they usually did after a brutal practice session. Maybe he was just over thinking. Yeah, that makes sense, he tended to do that often and everybody always turned out fine, why was he even worrying now—

And then Hongjoong started to fall over, eyes rolling back and body falling limp, and Seonghwa’s brain stopped working as he lunged forward, briefly registering the quiet Seong that fell from Hongjoong’s lips as he fell and passed out.

Propelling his body forward across the room, Seonghwa practically felt the confused eyes of the other members on his skin but he paid no mind to it, too hyper-focused on his captain’s body falling, falling, falling—

Stretching his arms forward, Seonghwa felt skin connect with skin and his knees hit the ground but he barely paid any mind to it, instead directing all his attention to Hongjoong, whose eyes were closed and whose body was limp and not moving—

“Hongjoong-hyung!” several of the members yelped, scampering over to crowd around him, worried looks decorating their once-tired faces.

“Someone get another bottle of water,” Seonghwa ordered, and Jongho instantly complied, jumping up to go grab more fluids. “Mingi, honey, can you get a fan or something? I think he needs to cool down,” he continued, and Mingi listened, rummaging through his bag that he had brought over until he eventually procured a fan, nervously fanning Hongjoong’s face and watching for any sign of him waking up.

“Does he need anything else?” Wooyoung piped up, looking uncharacteristically scared.

“I don’t know. We’ll just have to wait until he wakes up. He didn’t hit his head or anything, so his body should physically be pretty fine, but if he doesn’t know what caused him to pass out, then we might have to pay the hospital a visit,” Seonghwa responded, trying to convey the facts but also trying not to scare the second-youngest.

Thankfully, it only took around two minutes for Hongjoong to rouse, face scrunching up and eyes opening blearily, shifting to look around the room in a daze, before they slowly started to re-focus on Seonghwa hovering nervously above him, hands still cradling his head.

“What happened,” Hongjoong slurred, still appearing a bit confused.

“You fainted after standing up and Seonghwa-hyung caught you. Are you okay, Hongjoong-hyung?” Yeosang asked, eyes filled with worry as he looked at his captain.

“I did? I…don’t really remember…” Hongjoong admitted, rubbing his eyes and trying to sit up. Seonghwa supported him, guiding him upwards until he was upright but not standing yet.

“Are you alright? Do we need an ambulance, hyung?” Yunho chimed in.

“Wait, you said it was after I stood up?” Hongjoong asked, looking at Yeosang like he had just realized something.

“Yeah, hyung. You seemed pretty normal but then you stood up and just started falling over before Seonghwa-hyung got to you. What does that have to do with this? Are we missing something?” Yeosang questioned after replying to Hongjoong, the worry in his eyes somehow increasing.

“Yeah. I have orthostatic hypotension,” Honejoong said matter-of-factly, like that explained everything and not like Ateez’s brains as a collective has to do a double take to comprehend those two words.

“I’m sorry… You have what, again?” Wooyoung asked loudly.

“Orthostatic hypotension,” Hongjoong said slowly. “It’s a medical condition where, when I stand up after being in a seated position, my blood pressure drops drastically. That drop in blood pressure then leads to a temporary pause or shortage in the amount of blood going to my brain, which makes me super dizzy and, in some cases, makes me pass out. I’ve actually had this diagnosis since I was a trainee…I thought you guys knew about it?” he questioned at the end of his explanation, looking up at Seonghwa for answers.

“No…we didn’t. I have never even heard about said condition, much less that you are diagnosed with it,” the eldest responded, looking worried, eyebrows scrunching together in concentration and anxiety.

“Wait, so you only pass out sometimes?” Mingi asked, wringing his hands nervously as he shuffled a step closer to his leader.

“Yeah. I always get really dizzy and disoriented, which is why I try to stay hydrated and avoid standing up rapidly, but I only faint sometimes. I was probably super dehydrated from the practice, so that’s why I passed out earlier,” Hongjoong responded. “Hwa, can you help me stand up, please?”

“Of course,” the man replied, quickly grabbing Hongjoong’s sides to provide support as he stood up again. He wavered for a second, blinking rapidly, but didn’t fall again. He simply shook his head a few times, presumably to clear his vision.

“You made it!” Yeosang cheered, and Yunho looked at him with an expression that seemed like he wanted to be serious but was actually desperately trying to hold back laughter. Hongjoong swatted at him half-heartedly, and Jonho snickered when Yeosang gave a little yelp.

“Well…thanks for telling us, Hongjoong-hyung,” San piped up, and the leader turned to look at him, face already back to its normal pale shade. “Is there anything else we need to know? Things we should always have with us, or something like that?”

“Um…I’ve found that eating something or drinking fluids helps my blood pressure stabilize, but there’s really nothing you can bring other than that….Oh! Before I forget! I was also diagnosed with another condition called vasovagal syncope,” Hongjoong started.

“Oh! I think I’ve heard of that one!” Yunho chimed in, but still shrunk back a bit when Hongjoong looked at him.

The older man simply grinned, inviting him to continue his explanation.

“I think… It’s where someone passes out because of triggers, right? Like blood?” Yunho asked, suddenly looking extremely unsure about his answers.

“Yep, that’s it! There’s other triggers, obviously, but I think blood is the big one for me. Basically, seeing it causes another dramatic drop in my blood pressure so I pass out, like what happened before. Again, food and water would be helpful if it acts up, but I don’t have any medication for it. I’m pretty good at managing my conditions, though,” Hongjoong finished, looking around at his members, who were concentrating on absorbing the information to help their hyung. He smiled softly at their obvious determination to aid the captain in any way possible.

Little did he know there would be multiple times that said aid would be very much needed and appreciated.

Chapter Text

“Oh my god, I’m exhausted,” Wooyoung panted, trudging over to the nearest couch to flop down on it, sweat dripping from his face and his fan desperately working overtime.

“I agree,” Jongho said. “It’s way too hot to be doing a concert for three hours.”

The group had just finished their Chicago concert and the roar of the audience still rang in their ears as the adrenaline faded away, leaving their body battered and tired and in need of copious amounts of water.

Hongjoong sat next to Wooyoung, pushing his sweaty black bangs away from his forehead. He flicked Wooyoung’s forehead teasingly and received a (rather pitiful) whine in response from the worn-out man.

One by one, the rest of the group trickled into the waiting room, each soaked in sweat and water yet wearing matching expressions of exhaustion and pride.

Acting just like the mom he is, Seonghwa said, “Good job guys. You all did so well.” Hongjoong could have sworn that his eyes were suspiciously shiny but didn’t comment on it.

“Thanks, mommy,” Wooyoung snarked back, and Seonghwa turned to him in shock as San barked out a surprised laugh. “Sorry,” Wooyoung mumbled under his breath, shrinking back into the couch as Seonghwa leveled him with his most deadly glare.

“The crowd sure was rowdy tonight,” Yunho noted, standing in the corner of the room and fanning himself.

“They were,” Yeosang agreed. “It makes it so much more fun to be on stage when people scream along with you.”

There was a pause as the members drifted back into their recent memories, briefly reliving those moments on stage, where they could sing and dance and rap and just be with thousands of people who loved them just as much as they loved each other (well, not as much, but close enough).

“Let me go check with manager-nim and see if he has anything to add about our performance,” Hongjoong decided. And as he stood up, he took a minute step back, wobbling in place, and Wooyoung just knew what was going to happen before it even did.

Hongjoong’s expression went blank before his eyes rolled back and his body started falling towards the ground. Wooyoung shot forward, grabbing the elder’s upper body with his hands even as his back crashed into the couch.

“Water!” he yelped. “Someone get Hongjoong-hyung water!”

Yunho darted to the wall with the cold water bottles, quickly giving one to Wooyoung. Seonghwa also came over with the other members, having noticed the commotion.

“Hyung, what do I do?” Wooyoung fretted. “Do I give him the water now, or–?”

“Calm down, Wooyoungie, just wait for a second. He’ll be waking up soon, I think…” and no sooner had Seonghwa finished speaking in his calm, soothing tone than Hongjoong’s eyes cracked open and then shut again as he weakly lifted his arms to cover his face from the assault of the bright lights.

“Hyung, drink your water, please,” Wooyoung said, a bit desperate but still trying to be calm. Hongjoong only grunted, not moving for a second before he conceded, lifting his arms away and weakly sitting up, Wooyoung helping prop him up against the front of the couch.

Wooyoung uncapped the bottle, careful not to spill anything, and passed it to Hongjoong, who seemed relieved at the cool temperature of the liquid. He took a few swigs, careful to not drink too much at once, before beginning to drink at more regular intervals.

“I passed out, didn’t I?” he asked once he had drunk over half the water. He grimaced when Yunho nodded mutely. “Sorry. I knew I was dehydrated, but it was probably a bad idea to stand up so quickly regardless…”

“It’s okay, hyung, it’s really beyond your control,” San piped in from where he was standing next to Yunho. “We’ll always be here to help, anyways.”

“Thank you, Sannie,” Hongjoong said, making an unusually appreciative face at the younger, who simply grinned back. “Thank you too, Wooyoungie. You caught me, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, I guess I did, but I was almost too slow, hyung,” Wooyoung responded, pouting a little bit. If Hongjoong had hit his head, it would have been his fault, and it was a dangerous, volatile situation that he wished they had never been in.

“Aish, Wooyoungie, don’t be so harsh on yourself,” Seonghwa scolded, and Hongjoong chuckled.

“Well, at least I know you guys were watching carefully. I appreciate you guys actually remembering my condition,” Hongjoong said, carefully using the couch cushions to stand up on weak legs. Wooyoung accompanied him on the way up and stood close to him, shoulders touching, for some extra support.

“Of course, hyung.”

Chapter Text

“Hyungs, I’m making ramen!” Jongho called from the kitchen, hustling around and setting bowls and the ramen packets on the counter.

“Sounds good!” Seonghwa yelled back with a chorus of agreements accompanying him, courtesy of the 6 other members.

Mingi and Wooyoung wandered into the kitchen, probably lured by the smell of the sauce packets and assorted spices. Hongjoong followed them, and when Mingi raised an eyebrow as if asking him why, he simply shrugged, saying, “I feel like we’ll end up with no kitchen if you two are in here unattended.” He smirked at Wooyoung’s wounded face and leaned against the counter, pulling out his phone and starting to scroll on it.

“Oh! Oh! Jongho-yah, let me cut the green onions!” Mingi practically begged.

“Hell no,” Jongho instantly shot back. “You’re going to mess up so badly I can’t even fathom it.”

“No I won’t,” Mingi whined back. “I’m your elder; you have to listen to meeeee…”

After a minute of Mingi giving Jongho his best puppy eyes and the younger responding with a blank, dead stare, the latter finally rolled his eyes, “Fine, but if you chop off a limb it’s on you, not me.”

As he handed the knife over, Mingi gave a happy, rather undignified squeal of joy and Wooyoung barked a laugh from the couch where he was scrolling through television channels.

The dorm devolved into its usual chaos, Jongho yelling at Mingi constantly with a stressed tone that made him seem years older than he actually was while Mingi just gleefully chopped up the green onions, ignoring any attempts of help or assistance.

Then, of course, the inevitable happened.

“Ah–” Mingi hissed, putting the knife down and shaking his hand out. 

“Seonghwa hyung! Get the bandages, please! Mingi cut himself like we all knew he would, and it’s not pretty!” Jongho quickly shouted, switching into protective, worried mode. He ran to the sink, wetting a paper towel and bringing it over to Mingi to wrap around his index finger.

“I got some! Here, you said Mingi-yah cut himself? Is it bad?” Seonghwa asked upon skidding into the room with the first aid kit. Hongjoong had looked up from his scrolling, hearing that one of his members was hurt, and was watching the exchange with a tense, worried look on his usually stoic face.

“Here, what do you think, hyung?” Mingi asked, unwrapping the paper towel from his finger, and oh, that was the wrong thing to do. Blood instantly started seeping out from the cut, dripping with intent onto the counter, some of it soaking through the towel that had turned a few shades redder than it should have been. 

Hongjoong’s eyes widened at the sight of all the blood, dripping down, down, down, in viscous red droplets, all over the counter and on Mingi’s hand and--

His vision petered out as his phone dropped from his hand and clattered onto the ground, followed by his entire body.

Everyone flinched at the sudden noise, turning just in time to watch the captain’s body crumple like paper onto the wooden kitchen floor. Seonghwa instantly deposited the first aid kit onto the counter, trusting Jongho to take care of Mingi while he took care of Hongjoong.

“Wooyoung! Water, please,” he commanded, voice firm, already starting to fall into a bit of a rhythm as he slowly got used to living with Hongjoong’s conditions.

Wooyoung brought him a chilled bottle, and Seonghwa laid it over Hongjoong’s forehead to cool him down a little and also help shock him back into consciousness. 

It seemed to have had an effect of some sorts, as Hongjoong came to faster than any of his previous occasions. Seonghwa wordlessly handed him the water, and the younger took it gratefully.

“Was it from the blood?” Seonghwa asked once Hongjoong had stopped drinking and seemed able to talk.

“I think it was,” Hongjoong quietly confirmed. “I just--there was so much, everywhere , and I just couldn’t--” he broke off, seeming a bit mad at himself.

“It’s okay, hyung, it’s out of your control,” Seonghwa reassured him gently.

“Yeah. Don’t worry hyung, Jongho bangdaged me up real well,” Mingi added from where he was observing by the kitchen counter. He shot a sappy look at Jongho, who just rolled his eyes, annoyed but endeared.

“I’ll try to be more careful next time…I just got worried,” Hongjoong said quietly. “I knew I could pass out, but…”

“But you heard one of your members was hurt, and you decided that checking on them was better than protecting your own health, and that’s fine. If anything, it just proves your devotion to us,” Seonghwa said.

“Hongjoong-hyung loves us!” Woyoung yelled dramatically.

Hongjoong rolled his eyes, a grin cracking on his face. 

Thank you, he mouthed to Seonghwa in the chaos that followed Mingi slapping Wooyoung’s shoulder.

Anytime, the elder mouthed back.

Chapter Text

“Alright guys, get back to filming. Let’s go, I know you’re all tired but be considerate and think of the staff here too,” the manager called out in a bored tone of voice with just a hint of frustration laced into it.

Seomghwa glanced over at him, a bit confused at the sudden attitude, but dismissed it. It was hot, everyone was sweating and thirsty; his crabby demeanor was understandable. That didn’t mean Seonghwa liked it, though.

“Let’s go boys; the sooner we can get this over with, the sooner we can go home and take a nice cold shower,” Hongjoong called out to everyone, using his leader-tone that just made everyone want to stop and immediately do whatever he said. He cleared his throat before standing up, pausing for just a second as he blinked before walking over to the filming crew, presumably to just run over the script and what they needed to act out.

Seonghwa’s eyes narrowed, mentally taking note of how the younger seemed to be a bit dehydrated, and ran through what to do if he had an episode, just to be sure he remembered.

“Hyung, are we almost done?” San asked, wandering over to Seonghwa and snapping out of his thoughts. “It’s so hot out…”

“I know, Sannie, but it’s only going to keep getting hotter the longer we delay filming. Besides, we’re doing sports today, so we can at least have fun with each other,” Seonghwa replied, trying to keep the mood optimistic. It was hard to fake a good attitude on-screen, so keeping the team’s spirit up meant a lot during circumstances like this.

“Alright,” San said, accepting the explanation before walking away to go chat with Wooyoung. 

“Okay! Places please,” the manager instructed. “Remember, we’re just going to be playing football. The teams have already been decided; all you guys have to do is literally just play around. It is more convincing if you legitimately try to score, so don’t forget to keep ATINY in mind as you play. You’ll be playing for around 30 minutes, so be aware of your physical state; I know it’s hot, but we have to wrap this up quickly to give it to the editors, so please be compliant and do not interrupt filming to chug water. Thank you.”

The group separated into their designated teams–-San, Mingi, Yeosang, and Jongho versus Wooyoung, Hongjoong, Seonghwa, and Yunho. Seonghwa kept stealing quick little glances at the leader, making sure he was doing alright, before his attention was diverted by the sound of the cameras rolling. The whistle blew, and the game began.

For a while, Seonghwa’s worries were pretty much forgotten. He tried to keep an eye on him, just to be safe, but multiple times he found himself grinning as he kicked the ball away from Mingi, who squawked in indignation as Seonghwa passed the ball to a teammate. He could tell that most everyone was having some fun, too; San was definitely getting into it, and San getting into it meant Wooyoung was getting into it, who in turn raised most of their spirits.

Seonghwa tried to calm his breath down, watching as Wooyoung charged down the field in front of him, being chased down by Yeosang. He put his hands on his lower back, just standing and watching as he caught his breath.

He felt someone sidle up next to him, and was a bit startled (and worried) when he saw that it was Hongjoong who was…not looking too great.

“Is everything alright?” Seonghwa asked quietly. Hongjoong paused for a second, looking downwards a bit, but as he opened his mouth to speak, he was interrupted.

“Seonghwa! Hongjoong! Please get back in the game and stop lazing around and chatting over there!” the manager shouted, looking angry. The pair flinched, and Hongjoong just gave him a small nod and halfhearted smile as he jogged back over to where the rest of the boys were on the ground wrestling for the ball, leaving the older with a feeling of dread in his stomach.

Seonghwa tried–-he really did–-to get back into the game with his usual vigor, but he just couldn’t do it. He was so worried about Hongjoong, who was getting increasingly paler with each passing minute as he kept on running around the field. His movements were erratic, and when he stood still for just a moment to stabilize himself, the elder could see how his hands shook.

Finally, it just became too much for Seonghwa’s mind to handle. “Manager-nim, can we please get a water break? I don’t think any of us feel that good,” Seonghwa asked, and it was true–-people were starting to slow down, energy diminished as they sweated profusely, but he was mostly asking for Hongjoong’s sake.

His manager only scoffed, rolling his eyes. “You can get water when we’re done filming. It won’t take too much longer, but we’re not going to stop recording just so you boys can get something to drink. Now get back out there and play.”

Why can’t you just record us taking a water break? Seonghwa wanted to yell, but he held it in. It would be harmful for everyone (but especially Hongjoong, since he was the leader) if he had an outburst, so he bottled it up and jogged back to the field. The feeling of dread didn’t leave him.

So five minutes later, when Hongjoong stumbled up to him, Seonghwa could just tell what was going to happen.

“Seong-Seonghwa, I’m-I’m so dizzy,” Hongjoong panted, taking huge breaths but his chest still heaving. Seonghwa’s eyes widened as he watched Hongjoong sway on his feet for a moment, closing his eyes tightly like the sun was too bright (which it absolutely was), the elder already mentally formulating how he would yell at the manager. “I’m gonna-I’m gonna pass out,” was all the leader managed to say before his legs were buckling and he was falling forward.

Seonghwa lunged forward and caught him, being careful not to jostle his head as he lowered the unconscious man onto the ground. “Cut the recording! I need medics over here!” he shouted, hoping he was loud enough and not caring about the manager anymore. The rest of the boys all ran over, San with a water bottle in hand, and they formed a protective circle around Hongjoong, warily letting a medic in to observe.

“He’s got vasovagal syncope and orthostatic hypotension and he’s too hot right now,” Seonghwa felt himself saying, the words coming out in an almost rehearsed way. “We need to cool him down and get something in his system.”

The medic nodded in agreement, using their fan to blow cool air over Hongjoong’s face and neck in hopes of cooling him down a little. The manager tried coming over but Seonghwa shot him an angry look and he backed off reluctantly, though he still managed to look irritated. That’s fine; Seonghwa would deal with him later.

As Hongjoong began to rouse, body still soaked in sweat, San offered Seonghwa the bottle with wide, round eyes. The eldest gently started giving Hongjoong the liquid, little by little, and Hongjoong’s eyes fluttered open after a couple sips. He tried to sit up, eyes wide in alarm before they fluttered, threatening to roll back into unconsciousness before Seonghwa forced him to lay flat again.

“Don’t move, Joong. Let the medic take care of you,” he said, and Hongjoong’s eyes flicked to him before sliding shut again as he relaxed his body.

The group slowly got Hongjoong to cool down, using fans and water-soaked towels as the leader continued to sip on his water. Seonghwa waited alertly as Hongjoong finally made another attempt at sitting up, and the elder mentally sighed in relief when nothing appeared to happen. Silently, Seonghwa helped hoist Hongjoong up on his feet, holding him stable as black spots invaded the other’s vision before blinking away.

The manager came over again, and Seonghwa could see the dots connecting in Hongjoong’s head as he narrowed his eyes, just the tiniest bit, at the other man.

“What were you thinking?” Seonghwa hissed, not feeling apologetic in the slightest–-not even when Hongjoong shot him a warning look. “You felt how hot it is today, yet you denied Hongjoong his water? I need an explanation, and it better be a damn good one.”

“I-I didn’t-” the manager started, trailing off before continuing again. “I didn’t think it would get this bad…”

“Well I did, and I tried to tell you, but apparently you know about my leader’s health more than I do,” Seonghwa shot back. 

“Step down, both of you,” Hongjoong interjected, and Seonghwa’s gaze softened as he and the manager complied, the other man looking torn and guilty about his actions.

“The company will hear about this, manager-nim. Thank you for your time,” Hongjoong said shortly, and the manager paused before he gave a tiny nod, walking back to the camera crew in defeat. Hongjoong turned to Seonghwa once the manager's back was turned. “Hwa? Can we go home now?” he asked, voice smaller than before, and Seonghwa absolutely melted.

“Of course, Joong. I’ve had enough sports for a while, I think.”