Chapter Text
The first time that Chloe asked him to stay was perhaps the only time at that point in her life that she'd have wanted him to stay. Truly wanted. She was carrying Trixie in her arms, and felt so vulnerable, so scared, that she was willing to endure the endless amount of innuendos and jokes pointed at sex in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, he'd make her - or Trixie - feel better about being alone.
Malcolm had taken a toll on her. Chloe wasn’t one to admit her flaws, or her weaknesses, but at that point; in the face of sheer terror, she could. She knew that her own daughter being snatched away from her was going to make her second guess every single step, for at least a short while. Make her quicker to snap; sooner to act. The detective knew that she would likely accompany Trixie right into the school for a little while, and wait outside just to be sure. But, she could only have control over so much.
She didn’t have control over what happened to her when she slept. What Mazikeen had said – “And to think I almost killed you in your sleep that one time,” – those words were only testament to this fact. Chloe couldn’t control what could happen to her whilst she was vulnerable. She would lose her job if she didn’t sleep; she barely got enough rest as it was, but she could see no other way to protect Trixie from the ever growing dark in the outside world. Unless Lucifer was there.
Lucifer had offered to drive her home; being as shaken as she was, Chloe gladly agreed. The drive was silent. He didn’t speak, which was unusual; perhaps he, too, understood the gravity of the situation. The radio, at one point, sparked to life, and Lucifer twisted the volume knob so hard Chloe briefly feared it would come off of the car in his grasp. Trixie dosed in the back of the car during the entirety of the ride. No matter how scared the girl had been, the day was obviously taking its toll on her. Lucifer did not speed, which surprised Chloe; she realised that he was driving gently as not to wake the child.
Chloe was the first to break the near-suffocating silence, "Lucifer, I really appreciate this-"
"Don't mention it," she was mildly surprised - no jokes about getting her into bed, or how she was 'cutely vulnerable'. Nothing, apart from honest words and white knuckles.
He was gripping the steering wheel so tightly she thought it might snap. Not in a descriptive way, more in a literal sense. She had seen him throw someone through a window without breaking so much as a sweat. A steering wheel did not seem so impossible to break. Something had happened when he had been...gone. Dead. It confused and pained her to think about him like that, but he had been. Dead. She couldn't quite understand how he had jumped up so easily, the charisma flowing from him once again. He had given Malcolm a stupid nickname, for fuck's sake. But there had been something off about it. The whole situation, it seemed eerie in a sense. There was something he was not telling her.
She had asked. The fact that he was alive – with no wounds whatsoever, it seemed – bothered her. If she was disallowed from being concerned about his mortality, the least she could ask was if he was okay.
Of course he had brushed it off. Lucifer never allowed himself to be vulnerable; he was the devil; clawed up from hell, so it seemed, perfectly formed and oozing with charisma. Chloe did not, for a second, believe him… but Malcolm, that entire situation, had her wonder. She did not understand, at all, but she knew that pressing further would just cause him to shut down even more. She didn’t want that – not now.
They turned into her driveway slightly too quickly for her liking, and Trixie stirred slightly. Enough to sleepily ask if they were home yet.
"Yes, sweetie," Chloe spoke slowly. She was not looking at her daughter, though. She was looking at Lucifer. Although he'd had the common sense to shut off the vehicle, he hadn't stepped outside of it. He was staring into space, and he looked...haunted. There was something stirring in his brain, something bad. Chloe reached out and brushed her hand against his shoulder. That seemed enough to rouse him, and he flashed her one of his blinding grins as he stepped out of the car. He almost immediately took Trixie out, so that Chloe did not have to bother herself, and handed her the sleeping child.
That was certainly odd.
She did not have to explain to herself Lucifer's almost constant aversion to children. The nickname 'spawn' was the most notable part of this fact, or his bad attempts at 'playing' with Trixie.
But this?
This was all too different. This was not him. There was something wrong.
Chloe couldn’t march after Lucifer, not with Trixie dozing in her arms, so she entered the house. Lucifer had conveniently opened the front door for her, and when she turned to look at him, he was stood awkwardly by the door. He was playing with his cufflinks – something the detective had noticed as a nervous habit of his. She did not paint him as one to get nervous.
"Chloe, I-" It left a warm feeling in her chest when he called her by her name. Not 'detective'. It didn't happen often, and part of her wanted to cherish it, but she knew this had to be said.
"Stay," It was one word, but she hoped he understood.
Understood the dread curling down her spine. Tickling at her senses. She felt as if someone was breathing down her neck, but turning to look just showed her the darkness of the hallway. From the corner of her eyes, the twinkle of a gun, and the shout of Lucifer as he went down. Chloe knew all the lights were staying on that night, regardless. She still heard Malcolm's words in the back of her mind. How he took her out of school, how he-
"I can't." The expression he wore was so different to the mask he usually donned. It seemed...regretful. And not in a I-wish-I-got-her-number way. More of a I-wish-I-could way. Sincere. It was tender, and somehow, she knew she wasn't going to see it ever again. He almost looked vulnerable. For a moment, Chloe felt as if she was looking behind the charisma, and instead, at pure [i]Lucifer[/i].
“Lucifer, please!” It came out more desperate than she intended, and she paused, “I…” Chloe didn’t want to admit that she was scared, but he seemed to know. Lucifer stepped closer, tilting her chin so that she was locking eyes with him. His index finger was resting beneath her chin, tickling her throat; it was such a delicate touch. For a moment, she thought he was going to kiss her, and her stomach flipped.
"I know," he smiled almost ruefully. "I have urgent matters in which I need to attend...I need to speak with my brother."
Chloe looked up at him, “okay.” She said slowly. It was not okay; far from it, but she could not say that to him. He needed time to himself, to sort himself out, and she needed to do the same.
"Okay?" Lucifer frowned, but half-turned to the door.
She nodded at him, and, as usual, he was gone. When she asked, Chloe wasn’t quite certain what she had expected. In a sense, she knew that this would always have been the outcome.
She did not ask him to stay for a while.
Part of the reason was because she did not want to endure the sexual teasing.
But, mostly, she could not deal with the rejection. Not again.