Work Text:
[Redacted Date]
There are multiple objective facts in the world.
And said objective facts are backed up by evidence.
The evidence that backs up the facts is commonly very strong.
For example, here are three facts that I, David Williams, believe.
Number One: I am a man.
Number Two: I have a friend named André Ramao.
Number Three: I am not in love with my friend.
And the sooner I accept fact number three, the sooner I will be able to focus on my studies.
[Redacted Date 2]
I did not accept fact number three.
That is very unfortunate, so I will be listing all the reasons why it would be a bad idea to get entangled with him.
1. It would hinder my academic progress.
2. I would become insufferable, talking about him all the time and making everything about him.
3. He would make me feel like I’m something divine, which would inflate my ego, but I don’t think I’d mind too much. Not if I get to bury my face into his neck, breathing in the scent of a man who I’ve known for years, but will know in a different light. Not if I get to intertwine our fingers like they were always meant to be intertwined. Not if I get to trace the veins in his arms, and admire them, like they’re a work of art.
Wait.
Note to self, ignore number 3.
Please.
[Redacted Date 3]
Diary. I have got to BITE THAT MAN. He is so biteable. I need to see if he likes biting.
HE DOES!!!!
[Redacted Date 4]
I have made a grave mistake.
I should not have gone out and consumed those beverages.
I should not have shown him my teeth in that manner.
He hates me now.
I’m sure of that.
And he should.
I’m a monster.
[Later In Redacted Date 4]
He does not hate me.
Thank goodness.
I am afraid that he feels uncomfortable around me, though.
Wait, why am I afraid?
I knew this would happen eventually.
[Redacted Date 5]
Oh god.
Oh no.
This is horrible.
He said my fangs are lovely.
And I’m inclined to believe him.
I need to not interact with him for a month at most.
Even though his smile was so sincere when he said it, and his eyes were crinkled at the edges, which is a sign of true, unfiltered happiness from him, and his eyes looked so beautiful in the late afternoon light..
God, I’m pathetic.
Why am I like this?
[Redacted Date 6]
I need to stop this.
These feelings are a blight on my subconscious, and I hope that I can cut them off before they get worse, like a cancerous tumor.
Problem is, I’m not a surgeon.
Thus, I will cease my incessant yammering about the man I love greatly admire.
Yes.
Greatly admire.
That’s what this is.
Admiration.
[Redacted Date 7]
I can’t stop it.
It’s not admiration.
It is love.
A change in perspectives is needed.
David’s writing in the journal was frantic, like he was trying to pour every single thought he had about the man who he had known since childhood into it.
He knew that these feelings were wrong, and that he should be ashamed of them, so he thought the best solution to that would be to put his thoughts into a book that no one would ever find out about.
No one would find out about the journal, and his feelings would be safely hidden.
Absolutely no one-
“David?”
Shit
He scrambled to hide the journal, looking like a cat trying to catch the red dot on the floor as he did so.
When André entered the room, David looked as nonchalant as a man who had just hid a journal that detailed his feelings for his best friend would be.
That being, not nonchalant at all.
“Hey, André. How’s life treating you?”
He was trying to seem like he was reading a book about something.
Unfortunately, he was holding the book upside down, and he looked vaguely stressed, which, surprisingly, was unusual for him.
“It sure is treating me.”
David could feel the other man’s eyes boring into the book, and though he did not mind the fact that he was being stared at by a handsome man, there were alarm bells ringing in his head.
“David, are you aware that book’s upside down?”
Shit. I’m done for. David thought, already visually mapping out the moment the other man would find the journal and sever their friendship.
He flipped the book right side up.
“I was practicing reading upside down. It’s a good skill to have.”
He knew it wasn’t the truth, but he did find the concept of reading a book upside down interesting, in all honesty.
André looked unconvinced, but seemingly accepted that answer.
“Right. It is a good skill to have.”
David then caught a glimpse of his eyes.
He shouldn’t have caught a glimpse of his eyes, because they looked even more beautiful than ever, and he felt like he would explode if he didn’t say-
“I love you.”
“Huh?”
David then pulled the other man onto the bed, and told André every single thought he had been keeping in that journal, because he was running on negative hours of sleep, a lot of caffeine, and pure, unadulterated yearning.
When he was done, he seemed to realize all he had poured out, and immediately started trying to take it back.
“Wait, I didn’t- You’re not-I mean, you are, but-”
André leaned closer to him, and David fell silent.
They stared into each other’s eyes for too long, in David’s opinion, and he was about to break the silence with an attempt at a joke before André blurted out:
“Did you reach into my mind and take every thought I’ve ever had about you, and then twist them into being from your perspective?”
David was not expecting that question, but he shook his head, because those were his own thoughts about the other man.
“Good.”
David felt a warm hand on his cheek, and he was certain that he would die if he was handled like one of those antiques that he knew the other man loved, so he tentatively brushed their lips together, meaning it as a show of his feelings before the affection killed him.
After doing that, he noticed the bewildered expression on the other man’s face.
“Something wrong? Am I a bad kisser or something?” He asked, genuinely concerned about his (boy?)friend.
“Hello? You feeling alr-”
He was then interrupted by André pulling him in for a kiss that was much deeper than a brush of lips, and that made his brain feel like it had exploded.
It felt so wrong, from the standpoint of him knowing that he had to deny that he would either have to marry a man or die alone, and choosing the option to die with no one to love.
But the part of him that he had repressed for many, many years was telling him that this was how it was supposed to be, that he should have done this a long time ago.
And just for once, he listened to that part.
When the two of them separated from the kiss, David laid his head on André’s shoulder.
“I love you. I love you, and I apologize for not saying that earlier.” He whispered, knowing that there was no going back after he said that.
“I know. And I love you too.”
“That’s good- Wait, how did you know?” David asked, not knowing how André would know about his feelings before he himself did.
“You were incredibly obvious, David.”
At that response, David’s face turned into a mask of mock-offense, because he knew that he was, indeed, obvious.
“Oh, please! I was the farthest thing from obvious!”
André let out a small laugh, and it was the most perfect thing in the world to David’s ears.
“You know you’re a horrible liar, right?”
“Yes, but you don’t need to rub it in. Not like I have WPD or something.”
“WPD?”
“You’ll know what it is.”
There was a smile on David’s face as he said that, like they were bantering as usual, even though he was the giddiest he’s ever been in his life.
“So, do you.. er..”
Unfortunately, he did not know how to ask the man he basically knew since birth out.
“Do you..”
He was drawing a blank, and trying not to panic as he did.
“Do I want to be your boyfriend?”
Oh, thank goodness.
“Yep. That’s what I was trying to say.”
André then pressed a kiss to David’s cheek, and David could swear he saw stars for a moment.
“Well, you’re in luck, then. Because I do want to be your boyfriend.”
David then rolled off the bed to let out an audible exclamation of joy.
“God, you’re such a dork.” André laughed, looking far too handsome as he did to David.
“Counterpoint: I’m your dork.”
David then got kissed all over his face, which sent his mind into orbit.
“I.. You are an unfair man.” He mumbled, with a lovesick smile on his face.
“Counterpoint: I’m your unfair man.”
“You sure are.”
In that moment, David felt like nothing bad could ever happen to them.
And he was partially correct.