Work Text:
ACT I
"Look, Nick. What Bogo and Clawhauser do in their off hours is none of our business."
"But, Carrots, you gotta agree, it's weird that they hang out so much, right?"
"... Yes, it's a little strange. And obviously I would love to know what's going on. But I don't need to know."
"You wanna, though."
"...."
"Come on, Fluff."
"..."
"If we are accidentally in the same neighbourhood, no one can blame us for keeping tabs on a couple of our buddies."
"Colleagues."
"Friendly colleagues."
"... Fine."
ACT II
"What are they doing?"
"Chatting. Still."
"Are you sure? Are either of their hands on the table?"
"No, and--"
"Oh! I think Bogo just leaned in!"
"You were the one that was fighting me on this. Chill out, Carrots. You're going to draw attention to us."
"Hey, sometimes--"
"Benji, you sly devil."
"What? What?"
"Look under the table."
"Ew!"
"It's called footsies, sweeth--"
"I know what it's called. And it's gross."
"Well, I can't argue with you there. Still, it seems to be working."
"Oh, yuck."
"Look, if we're gonna be seekers of the truth, we have to accept it when we find it."
"That was kind of wise."
"Really?"
"I mean, I said kind of."
"That's still very generous of you to--"
"Hopps! Wilde!"
"They've made us!"
"Run!"
ACT III
"So they're definitely in love."
"Might not be love, though I hate to break it to you, you romantic little bunny. It might be another L word that, if my mother is to be believed, will send you straight to hell. Although personally I never understood why we'd be programmed to feel it and then--"
"You were watching their feet--"
"I was keeping an eye on all the factors!"
"But I was watching their eyes."
"Ah, yes, the windows to the soul."
"There was love in them."
"Whatever you say, Carrots. I will take this opportunity to remind you, however, that I spent years on the street reading people, and--"
"I've noticed something about your eyes, too."
"...."
"I think, maybe, when you look at me and you think I don't notice... I think there's love in yours."
"!!!"
"Am I close?"
"Close is a relative term, especially when--"
"Nick."
"Fine! Yes! Jeez louise. How long have you known?"
"Long enough."
"Just my luck. I used to be a con man! I used to pull off elaborate schemes!"
"You were melting down popsicles."
"That's not--you came in during the twilight of my career, Carrots. Believe me when I tell you that earlier on there were--mmph!"
"..."
"..."
"Wow. I really was right."
"..."
"Is that all it takes to shut you up?"
"I was... ahem. I was buffering."
"Right."
"I don't--are you serious, Carrots? You too?"
"Me too."
"I can't believe it. This whole time I could have been making out with the most beautiful woman in the world, and instead--"
"Don't dwell on the past."
"You're right."
"Especially when you could be making out with her right now."
"Right!"
The End