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Chapter Text

“Ah, look who it is, if it isn’t your sexually ambiguous, angry little friend.”

Captain quipped to the gun-wielding ginger, who was now standing on the boombox, ready to shoot anything that moved.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend stared bewildered at Pico, who had practically appeared out of thin air. After the plane crash, they ended up in this barren wasteland in the middle of nowhere, suddenly surrounded by monochrome soldiers, who had decided after a couple quick singing battles, they were a threat and needed to be disposed of.

And at the last second, their mercenary friend had swooped in and taken charge of the situation, shooting the assholes who’d been holding Girlfriend at gunpoint. The two were thankful for his arrival, especially Boyfriend who’d recently rekindled his friendship with the ginger. But the odd thing was, how had Pico even gotten here? He wasn’t on the plane with either of them.

Whatever the case, as Pico turned his attention to the voice insulting him, the cocky smirk instantly vanished, replaced by a cold, bitter gaze.

He knew he’d recognized that voice.

John fucking Captian.

“Don’t you have a school to shoot up?”

And there it went. Of course, after maybe three or four years of no contact, instead of being even a little happy or at least surprised to see him, the first thing the captain did was mock him about that “incident”, striking a nerve within Pico.

Cocksucking bastard. What did he expect?

Pico’s lips curled into a snarl, and he pointed a middle finger at the captian.

“Fuck you, old man!” He hissed.

Captain laughed once.

“Heh, still haven’t grown out of that shitty attitude yet, have ya, kid?”

The couple watching the scene play out glance at each other with confusion. Pico actually knew this man.

“Do you two… know each other?” Girlfriend asks, turning her attention back to Pico.

The redheaded hitman replies with a bitter glare at Captain.

“Not anymore.”

That was… not the response they were expecting. Even though Boyfriend and Girlfriend were oblivious to who this soldier was before them not ten minutes ago, Pico seemed to have a history with him. And by the looks of it, not a good one.

Pico cocks his guns, wielding them in both hands and pointing them in either direction of himself. The soldier shot a frustrated glance towards the redhead. Captain’s men now had guns pointed at them, and he knew Pico. He knew how good his sharpshooting skills were. He knew the boy could easily take them all down.

Just like he’d taught him.

He’d almost be proud if he didn’t hate the little shit.

Taking his gaze off Pico, the soldier turns his attention back to the couple.

“There’s only one way to settle this… let’s rock! Ya little cunt!”

———————————————————

The battle was over just as quickly as it started. Tankman and Boyfriend had finished up their rap battle, while Pico was shooting soldiers to the beat of the music. After the bloodbath, the sharpshooter had escaped with Boyfriend and Girlfriend, finding a safe place to hide in case other soldiers found them.

The couple had thanked Pico for their help, and offered to get him back to safety and civilization as well, but for some reason, the mercenary had declined, and let them go on their way.

He apparently had some… “unfinished business” to attend to.

As for Captain? Instead of looking for the brats that had disgraced the wasteland with their sub-par singing and poor taste in clothing, he was leaning against the tank, cigar in his hand. Steve had apparently left it alone again, so it seemed. His husband never was good with remembering where he’d left the goddamn hunk of metal.

So he had decided to guard it for a while just in case one of those adolescent delinquents decided to come back and take it for a spin. Speaking of delinquents, there was one still on his mind from the battle earlier.

Pico.

As he took a drag of his cigar, he began to think. That kid had changed so much since they’d last seen each other. Since their… falling out. It was odd to him. The same little guy who he’d played with and held in his arms was now not only a grown man, but had just slaughtered the people who raised him.

He reminisced over those times in the past. The times when Pico and him would play tag out in the blazing heat, or when he’d comfort the boy after a nightmare, and even when he taught him how to shoot a gun. He’d always have that sweet, happy smile on his little face no matter what the circumstances, always wanting to follow Captain around and be just like him.

Pico had been a good kid before.

But now, he was an unstable and unpredictable man.

He needed help that he refused to get, and tore other people apart because of those issues. He was broken, and it seemed like he would never be fixed.

And Captain couldn’t be bothered to care for someone who was a lost cause.

Snapping out of the reminiscence, Captain sighed, dropping his cigar to the ground and extinguishing it with his boot. It was time to cut the sappy shit and move on. The soldier turns around, moving to enter the tank. He figured he might ride around and find Steve, wherever he’d gone in the midst of the chaos. And, if possible, find that blue haired bastard, then kill him and his girlfriend as a bonus. But as he turned…

The sound of gunfire rang through the air, and a bullet rushed past Captain’s face, nearly grazing his helmet.

The man yelped in shock and fear, freezing in place. Fuck, that was close. An enemy sniper must have taken a shot at him while he’d let his guard down. He had to get on the move, and quickly. The sniper could shoot again.

Captain quickly whipped around to spot his attacker, looking for another monochrome soldier with a spike on their head, ready to track their every move in case they shot again. But he didn’t find that.

Instead, the first thing he spotted was that bright orange hair.

The man relaxed, letting out a relieved sigh. The corners of his lips curled up into a shit-eating smirk.

“You missed.”

Pico’s eyes were narrowed at the captain, pointing his Uzi at the man in front of him. The man he thought he once knew. His white eyes were full of nothing but hate and disgust. He looked like he was going to kill the bastard, and considering the gun pointed at him, he probably would.

“Next time I won’t.” The mercenary hissed.

Captain chuckled at the corny response. The kid really hadn’t changed much. He was still that angry little shithead from before. The soldier leaned against the tank, crossing his arms, that stupid grin still plastered on his face.

“I didn’t think you had it in ya, kid.” Captain quipped.

Pico’s grip on the trigger tightened. “I’m not your kid.”

“You’d like to think so, wouldn’t you?”

Ouch.

Pico’s gaze hardened, trying not to show how Captain’s little quip had hurt him. The black and white son-of-a-gun’s smirk only seemed to grow, knowing he was pushing Pico’s buttons. The mercenary was such a short fuse, and Captain loved messing with him.

“So…” Captain began, turning his attention to the dirt floor. “How did ya get here anyway?”

Pico was frustrated that the man was starting small talk like he hadn’t left him alone for three years.

“I came looking for my friends.” He bluntly replied.

“Heh, well, we’re far away from any civilization. Ya couldn’t have just appeared out of nowhere.” The man smiled smugly. “You wanted to come find your old man again, is that it? Is that why you were here?”

Pico scoffed. He was really tempted to pull the trigger and cut the conversation short. But he decided to humor the captain with some more banter.

“Shut the fuck up. You cut me off for three years. Three goddamn years and you expect me to still see you like that?”

Captain rolls his eyes under his goggles. “Please, I did not cut you off. You did that to yourself. You were the one who said you never wanted to see me again. I was just fulfilling your wishes.”

The redheaded hitman felt anger rise in his chest like a lit flame.

He was mocking him. His own father was mocking him.

“You gave up on me.” His voice was dangerously low, his grip on the gun tightening. “You gave up on me when you said you’d always care for me.”

Captain can’t help but pause at those words, and he finds himself stiffening. His shit-eating grin faded into a frown, and his expression hardened. He wasn’t expecting the kid to say something like that.

After a moment of silence, the man cleared his throat, then spoke again.

“Kid-“

“Don’t call me that.” Pico spat back.

God damn it, this little shit stain was going to make everything harder, wasn’t he?

“Alright, alright, Pico, then. Pico, I never gave up on you. You’ve got it twisted.”

“Oh really?” The mercenary began shaking with anger.

The man glared right back at him, starting to get a little impatient and frustrated. “Yes, really. I wanted to take care of you, but you made it so hard. Every time I tried to help, you pushed me away or told me to fuck off.”

“So you gave up on me.”

“I did not.”

“Yes you fucking did!” Pico snapped. “Because I pushed you away, you saw me as a lost cause. When I ran away that night, you never came looking for me. You decided I was just another bad memory to forget.”

Pico’s eyes began to burn with the threat of tears, but he kept them away. Captain continued to glance at the floor with a stone-cold expression, ignoring the guilt gnawing at his insides.

With a shaky hand, Pico lets the gun fall to the dirt floor, his uzi meeting the ground with a soft thud. He had to drop it before he did something he’d regret.

“…Why’d you do it…?” His voice is much softer, much more vulnerable this time.

The captain hesitates for a moment. He doesn’t know how to reply to Pico. He can’t quip or joke his way out of this. The mercenary had him cornered, both figuratively and literally.

Pico just stared at Captain, expecting some sort of quick-witted response, but the man never said a word.

Why had he done this? Pico had been suffering alone for so long. After the shooting, he had gone into a dark place. And sure, he had pushed Captain away, but that was no excuse for his father’s behavior.

Everything between them had changed after the goddamn shooting. It’s like the captain saw him as a completely different person, in a completely different light. It wasn’t too long after when they parted, anyway. But that makes Pico wonder… and a thought crosses his mind.

“…You’re scared of me, aren’t you?”

The words hang in the air, making it feel thick with tension. Captain is completely surprised by that question. It causes him to look up at Pico.

“Huh?”

The mercenary looks at his father with hurt in his eyes. “You’re scared of me because you know what I’m capable of. You’ve known it ever since the shooting. That’s why you made that smartass comment earlier.”

Right. That.

Captain recalls the memory of his son exiting the school grounds, covered in blood that wasn’t his, a blank expression on his face. And, yes, in that moment, the captain had felt terrified.

Not for his son, but… of him.

He was happy the boy had survived, of course. But seeing him drenched in the red, dripping liquid, looking far beyond his years with a stare that could only be described as shattered...

The little boy he’d once held in his arms had killed people. Not good people, but still people nonetheless… and that had horrified him.

But Captain wasn’t going to admit that. No, of course, he was too proud.

“Tch, I’m not scared of you, ya little twink. You know your sharp shooting skills are pathetic.” He scoffed.

“It’s not my shooting you’re afraid of.” Pico shakes his head. “You’re afraid of me because I’m unstable, you…You wanted nothing to do with me because one day, I could snap and-and end up hurting you.”

Captain was… surprised by the shakiness in Pico’s voice. But he wasn’t about to let his stupid paternal instincts take over.

“Hah! Are you fuckin’ serious right now?! Do you hear yourself?”

The monochrome captain finally stops leaning against the tank, getting up and stepping closer over to Pico. He wasn’t about to let this stupid kid determine how he felt. His cocky smile made Pico’s blood start to boil.

“Don’t kid yourself. I was just tired of hearing all your whining and bellyaching all the time. I wasted 16 whole ass years on you, and what did I get in return? The cold shoulder.”

Pico’s eyes widened, his heart dropping to his stomach at the cruel words. Everything Captain said turned the small flame of anger into a growing fire, and Pico clenched his fists. When the man placed a hand on his shoulder, he practically seethed.

“Look, Peekaboo,” The captain spoke in a condescending tone, his smirk widening when he saw Pico’s teeth clenching with anger at his old nickname.

“I’m not scared of you, and I never was. I’m just not interested in wasting my time on a lost cause who can’t bother to help himself.”

Pico was left completely speechless, staring at Captain with an expression full of hurt and anger.

So that’s how his own father saw him, huh? As nothing but a broken, useless kid that couldn’t be fixed? He’d just given up on him like he was nothing.

He didn’t even see him as his son anymore.

And that shattered the ginger’s heart.

Captain removes his hand from Pico's shoulder, the grin still present on his face. He saw the tears forming in those white eyes,and he decided he was going to have just a little more fun before he left the kid on his own.

“What, are you seriously gonna cry right now? Ha hah!” Captain threw his head back and laughed. “Christ, I can’t believe I raised such a pussy-”

Before Captain could finish his sentence, a fist suddenly collided with the unprotected part of his face, making him stumble back and clutch his now bleeding mouth.

“Gack-!”

He recoils from pain, surprised by the sudden punch. When his eyes open again, he sees Pico with tears rolling down his cheeks, fist clenched and shaking, arm extended from the punch… and a furious fire in his eyes.

Captain was terrified, but at the same time, impressed. Nobody else would have the balls to punch him like that and get away with it with their head still intact.

Nobody but his son.

Honestly? He’d deserved the punch, the fucking bastard.

But it still pissed him off, nonetheless.

“What the fuck’s your problem?!” Captain barks, blood trickling down his split lip.

Pico pants heavily, shaking with adrenaline and rage, tears now flowing down his cheeks. This son of a bitch deserved everything that was coming to him and more. He’d called him a waste. He’d called him broken. And he was going to prove his father wrong.

“What happened to the warm hugs?!” The ginger shouted, “What happened to all the games we used to play, the shooting lessons, the post-nightmare comfort, all of it?! What did I do to make you hate me?!’

Pico was nearly face-to face with his father now, his voice trembling in anguish as he pointed a finger in the man’s face.

“I needed you, dad! I needed you to be there for me! I know I acted shitty before, but that doesn’t mean you just leave me on my own when things get bad! I…”I

He pauses, sucking in a breath.

‘...I know I’m a lost cause. I’ve known for years now. But, even so, a good father would have still stuck by my side through all the bad shit and not given up on me. A real dad would have loved me no matter what I said or did. But you wouldn’t know, would you?”

The ginger and his father stare at each other a few more moments in silence. Captain stares at Pico, bewildered, not only from the punch but from the other’s words. He wasn’t prepared for the mercenary to refer to him as “dad” again after all this time. Pico sighs, before continuing.

“Because you’re not a good father. You never cared about me. You never really loved me like you said you did. Otherwise you wouldn’t have hated me.

You never were a real dad.”

That strikes a chord within the monochrome sergeant. It almost hurt to hear that his adoptive son never truly saw him as a father. And the worst part was, he was right about all the shit he’d said.

Damn. He’d really fucked up, hadn’t he?

No. No, the kid was an asshole! He’d killed half of his army and made him look like a fool. He didn’t feel sorry for this ugly-ass redhead, in fact…

“Why did I waste my time on such a piece of shit like you, huh?!”

Pico almost recoils from the words as if they were a physical punch to the gut. The redhead tenses up, his eyes widening from the sheer impact of his own father’s words. The anger in his chest only continues to rise.

“You’re asking me what happened to our relationship, when you ruined it yourself! You were a good kid before you decided to fuck everything up and kill all those people!”

Captain spat, wiping his bloodied lip. “None of this is my fault, Pico! We had a good thing goin’, and you were the one who made everything worse!”

Captain glares at his son, the disappointment and anger behind his visor baring into Pico’s eyes. Pico clenches his fists, his own teary white gaze glaring back at the captain with pure rage. He was about to snap.

“Shut up…” Pico hissed.

But Captain was too caught up in his own little rant to stop now. He’s only inches away from his son, to the point where Pico can still see the crimson dripping down his old man’s lower lip from the punch.

“You’re sittin’ here cryin’ about how much you ‘needed me’, when you couldn’t be bothered to let your own father in and help you! If you really needed me, you wouldn’t have pushed me away and treated me like shit!”

The soldier pokes Pico in the chest, only amplifying his son’s anger. Pico’s fists were practically trembling from rage now.

“You think I’m scared, huh? Scared of a little shitstain like you?! Hah! If anything, you’re scared! You’re scared of being alone, which is why you came crawling back to me. But since you made it clear you don’t see me as your dad, then fuckin’ act like it! If you want to push everyone alone sooo bad, go back to your shitty little life! Go back to that stupid, ugly boyfriend of yours-”

“I said SHUT UP!”

The mercenary finally snaps. With that last shout, he lunges himself at Captain, shoving him to the ground. Captain yelps when his son suddenly attacks him, and in a panic, begins trying to shove him off. He manages to get Pico off him for a moment, gasping and scrambling to escape and get back into the tank.

Instead, Pico grabbed the man’s arm, using the rest of his strength to throw him to the ground with an infuriated shout. Captain hits the dirt floor, sending searing pains up his spine.

The soldier desperately tries to recover from the pain, fear beginning to rise in his chest. Seeing his boy, the one whom he’d cared for years, turn against him and attempt to hurt him like this…

He remembered when the ginger was little, he’d taught him how to fight against an enemy. It was important combat lessons, and little Pico would need to learn them while on the battlefield. He’d show what to aim for and how to strike, leaving Pico with some relatively impressive fistfighting techniques. And at the time, the little ginger had smiled and listened to his father, his eyes glistening with excitement as the father-son duo play-fought in the hot sun of the barren wasteland.

But now, there were no more happy smiles.

There were no more sweet, glistening eyes and soft little laughs.

Captain only saw a deranged, unstable man, who now had him pinned and was ready to fight, using the attacks he’d taught against him. He had their hands locked to try to push Pico back, but the mercenary was stronger.

…Impressive, honestly. But it didn’t stop his heart from racing with terror.

“Pico, stop it-!” Captain barked.

His command was interrupted as a fist collided with his face for the second time today. The captain howls with pain, falling back to the ground and clutching his face. He didn’t get much time to recover, however, as he was suddenly kicked hard in the chest, sending him skidding across the dirt and against a nearby wall. The metallic tang of blood rose in his throat.

But Pico’s bloodlust wasn’t yet satisfied.

Fuck it. He was going to kill this bastard.

He swooped down, grabbing his Uzi and rushing toward Captain, white hot rage searing through him and taking over his actions. He throws himself onto the man, and with an anguished yell, thrusts his arms forward, a sickening crunch following as fist collided with flesh.

“Fight back, damn it! Why aren’t you fighting back?!” The ginger screams as he continues to punch mindlessly.

Every punch only prolonged the poor captain’s suffering. Every time he thought he could get a breath, another hit came down upon his pale face. He couldn’t even scream for help. Pico was so much stronger than he was, and all he could do was weakly flail his arms to try to get the kid away and pray this would just be over soon.

He deserved it. As much as he was too proud to admit, he knew he deserved it.

With fire in his teary eyes, Pico continues to punch. He doesn’t even know why he’s still relentlessly throwing fists at his father, the man was practically rendered useless and half-dead at this point.

But still, he kept punching. And Punching. And punching.

Maybe it was from those years of being cut off. Maybe it was because of all the insults after their falling out.

Maybe it was the thought that, no matter what, his father never really cared for him like he’d thought.

And that hurt.

Finally, the punches stopped flying. Pico let his bloodied fists rest at his sides, panting and shaking furiously, watching with contempt as Captain lay there, face and chest bloodied up, only half conscious. He was still breathing, heavily and raggedly. He couldn’t have that. He wasn’t about to leave this fucker alive.

Captain barely registered the feeling of the punches ending. The only thing keeping him conscious at the moment was pure adrenaline from the fight. His face was dripping with warm, wet blood, his chest already bruised from the hard kicks and punches. He wheezed out slow, labored breaths. His visor was cracked, even. He was in a lot of pain.

He was going to die, wasn’t he? And at the hands of the little one he’d raised, no less.

His internal question was answered as he heard the sudden cock of a gun… and as he opened his eyes with great effort, he was met with a loaded Uzi, held point blank at his forehead. His eyes moved from the weapon to his furious son, their eyes meeting for a moment.

Damn. So he really was gonna die.

Captain wasn’t afraid of death, of course, he’d seen it every day on the battlefield. It was just a part of life now. He’d always thought he’d go out doing something badass and heroic, or at least something to do with the enemy. Not here, below his own son who only held contempt behind his eyes. But what a hell of a way to die.

Pico was an incredibly skilled fighter. Captain had fought hordes of enemy troops in the past, and they had never even given him a nick on his helmet. But his son, after teaching him everything he knew, managed to best the Sargent and leave him at the cusp of death.

He was almost… proud. His son was so much like him. Maybe even better. He’d been humbled, he knew that now. Although, he wasn’t about to go down without some dumb quips. A slow, pained smile creeps across Captain’s face, the muscles aching from even the smallest movement.

“Heh.” He started, pausing to cough. “Well, shit, k-kid… you really did have it in ya.”

Pico’s eyes widened. What the fuck? This prick was on the verge of death and still had the confidence to laugh at himself? What a fucking moron. It only made him wanna kill this bastard more. The mercenary pressed the gun to Captain’s helmet a little more prominently, showing the man just how much danger he truly was in. The sergeant barely flinched. After a moment of silence while Captain breathed strenuously, the man rasped again.

“…You’re one hell of a fighter. And a fine sharpshooter too… I taught you well.”

Pico’s eyes narrowed. Why was he still trying to fight and joke?

“You’re gonna die, dickweed. I have a gun to your head right now, and the first thing you think do do is crack a fuckin’ joke?”

“Heh… well…” Captain continued. “It’s not like I can do much else at the moment. So let me just tell ya… not many people have the balls to stand up against a captain of the militia like me. Much less my own kid. Ha…! to think, my own son, the kiddo I raised, brought me to the brink of death. Irony’s a pain in the nuts, isn’t it…?”

Their eyes met for a moment as the Sargent tried to laugh solemnly, the noise coming out labored and wheezy, ending up in a hacking cough which only brought up more blood. After recovering from a coughing spell, Captain looks back up at Pico. The ginger was surprised to see the sudden resignation in his eyes, the cocky smile finally gone.

“But you’re wrong about one thing. I do care about you. I care about you so much it’s unreal. Even after all that shit happened, I never stopped caring about you, Peekaboo. Ever.”

“…What?”

Pico is… at a loss for words. The anger in his eyes is replaced with confusion and frustration, the grip on his Uzi loosening.

Captain… cared for him? Still? After all this?

A spark of hope flickered in Pico’s white eyes as he gazed at the man who raised him. He recalls the memories they spent together, the happiness they shared over the years. This was still his dad… and he still cared.

But then, Pico’s gaze flickers back up to the gun. He remembered why they were in this situation in the first place. Captain had called him names and belittled him, causing him to snap and nearly kill the asshole. Now he was saying he cared? Bullshit. He was just saying that so he wouldn’t die. Pico’s gaze hardened again, focusing on the task at hand. He wasn’t about to let his emotions get in the way of what he needed to do here. He clutched the trigger tighter, his hand trembling.

“Stop lying. You and I both know that’s not true. At least, not all of it is.”

The sergeant looked up at his son desperately. “But it is…!”

“No, it’s not. Okay, sure… you may care. But that doesn’t just fix everything you did. You may say you care with all your cold fuckin’ heart… but you don’t really love me. You don’t love me enough to want me around, even when things get bad.

You still moved on. You pretended I didn’t exist. And I’m not gonna pretend that fucking hurt… you may pretend to care, but I won’t. And I’m gonna fuckin’ kill you for hurting me like that.”

As if to exemplify his statement, he pressed the loaded gun in his hand further against the man’s helmet. Captain flinched slightly, but his gaze just stayed stone cold. He knew Pico wasn’t going to believe his words. So, he gives up.He looks up at Pico, almost… challenging him.

“…If ya don’t care… then do it. Shoot me.”

Pico’s breath hitches, his eyes widening. Captain wasn’t even fighting back. He was just going to give up and let the mercenary kill him.

Well then, fine! If that’s what he wanted, then he’d kill the bastard! That’s what he was meant to do after all!

The gunman holds the uzi steady in his hand, readying the trigger. His eyes lock with his father’s, noticing the man barely even flinches. Pico’s angry gaze softens once more. God, he looked so defeated. So exhausted and miserable, like he was awaiting death’s sweet relief. There were no more quips from the once cocky man, just…

Deafening silence.

Pico should be laughing at Captian’s misery. He should be happy this dickhead who’d hurt him was going to die by his hand and his alone… and yet…

”…You’re not even going to, you know… like… beg for your life or anything?” The ginger questioned, almost hopefully.

“Nah,” Captain rasps. “Go ahead. You’ve beaten me nearly to death and taken my dignity. So go ahead. Lemme see if you got what it takes.”

Despite the pain, Captain smirks at Pico, leaving the ginger bewildered. Usually, when he had someone cornered and half-dead, they’d be begging for mercy to let them live. His father wasn’t doing any of that. He was just patiently waiting for death.

It… didn’t sit right with Pico.

The gunman just stood there, the uzi planted against his parent’s forehead. Captain locks exhausted eyes with him.

”Come on. You’ve come this far. Just do it, Pico…”

Behind that confidence, Pico could see the pain and desperation behind that cracked visor. The ginger shook his head and tried to save face, tried to pretend he was unfeeling as he slowly tightened his grip around the trigger. He closed his eyes, trying not to look in his father’s desperate eyes. He had to do it. He had to be strong and kill this ass.

…He couldn’t help but open his eyes again.

Something in the mercenary’s chest tightened upon looking back at the beaten Captain. As much as he tried to keep up that unfeeling exterior, he found his gaze softening again. His head flooded with the memories the two of them had spent together. Everything his father had taught him, the times he was comforted by those strong arms. His hand shook. He had to do it. He had to pull the trigger. Captain had still hurt him and left him alone. He just had to get this over with and…

And…

He couldn’t do it.

Despite his anger, despite all the horrid things this man had said to him, he couldn’t kill Captain. Whether it was from nostalgia or some subconscious fear of losing his father he didn’t know, but he just couldn’t bring himself to kill him.

The sergeant's eyes had been closed, preparing for the searing pain before inevitable darkness. But it never came. Instead of a booming gunshot ringing through the air, Captain heard a clatter on the ground. Cautiously opening his eyes, he saw Pico’s hand dropped and the uzi on the floor. The look of defeat was written on his son’s face now.

Wow. Captain had been sure this was about to be his demise. He was sure his son was about to land the final blow, and end him for good. Maybe he wasn’t as unstable and terrible as he thought. He was almost thankful that his son had decided to show him some mercy, and Pico saw it in his eyes for only a split second, until it turned back into that confidence and cocky smirk.

“Heh. Pussy.”

And with that, Captain finally slumped against the wall, letting himself fall unconscious as the adrenaline wore off.

Well. What now?

Pico stared at the now comatose man, instantly regretting his decision. He’d done it again. He’d let his emotions get the best of him and hadn’t killed someone, even though Captain had deserved it. His dad had been right… he really was a pussy.

“Fuck… Fuck!”

He hissed, turning and kicking his Uzi on the ground hard with his shoe. He buries his face into his hands for a moment as fresh tears begin flowing down his cheeks relentlessly without willing them.

He hated how guilty this made him feel. It didn’t fucking matter if Captian had raised him all his life, the guy had treated him like shit! Then why was he feeling this way? Why now, after all he’d said and done? Why couldn’t he stop crying and being such a fucking BABY?!

Turning his tear-soaked gaze back to the unconscious man behind him, Pico’s stomach churned at the fresh blood dripping down that pale face. He knew he did that, and he should be proud. But why wasn’t he?

Why was seeing the person who’d betrayed him injured like this making him feel sick?

Pico couldn’t take it anymore. He couldn’t take the memories, the guilt, the pain anymore.

So, what did he do?

He fled.

He turned and began to run, grabbing his trusty gun and running away from the crime scene. He didn’t know where he was going or what he was doing, all he knew was he had to get away. He took one look back at the man he’d brought nearly to the brink of death, then turned back and left those memories behind.

Chapter Text

The harsh sun beat down upon the wasteland. Even if it were beginning to set, the sweltering heat seemed to always be present in this warzone, and you could barely escape it due to the lack of clean water to swim in. Still, it didn’t stop father and son from taking a night ride to see the sunset.

The tank rumbled and groaned as it slowly crossed the barren land, heading towards the setting sun. Ginger hair flowed in the breeze while Pico hung onto the barrel of the tank, that happy smile plastered on his face as usual, despite the sweat dripping down his face from the heat. Captain cautiously watched his son, driving slowly so as to not accidentally let him fly off. Since becoming a father, he’d found himself being more cautious about what stunts he pulled and the things he said around his son. Not as cautious as Steve, no, but it was uncharacteristic for a cock-joke-making asshole like him.

The sergeant was grinning widely upon seeing his son’s sparkling eyes taking in the scenery around him. Even though Pico had been around the wasteland plenty a time, he never failed to be amazed by every little thing. The kid’s wide, white eyes seemed to always marvel at everything around him.

“Hey, dad?” Captain is snapped out of his thoughts when he heard his son’s little voice.

“Yeah, Peekaboo?” The man smiled.

Pico turned those wide eyes back to his father, a soft smile on his face.

“I’m glad you’re my father.”

Captain’s heart warmed upon hearing his little son’s sweet comment. He smiles, then opens his mouth to reply, when suddenly…

The warmth of the wasteland is suddenly replaced by the coldness of a black void. Pico was gone, and now it was just him again, alone.

Slowly beginning to wake up from the comatose, Captain could feel his senses begin to return to him. He felt a warm, fluffy softness under him, much different than where he passed out on the cold ground. It was obvious that he was now in some sort of bed. His sense of hearing was the next thing to come back after the ringing in his ears ceased, and he began to hear a slow, steady noise. A beeping of some sort. He tried to force open his eyes, groaning at the sudden throbbing in his head and swollen face. He was met with the scenery of the medical tent, the smell of chemicals and a hint of rubber overwhelming him. He was no longer wearing his helmet or uniform, only in his undershirt and boxers now.

Captain slowly began to sit up, his eyes fluttering and joints aching from the fight, making him grunt and groan. Damn it, that sweet memory had just been a dream. He was reminded of the fight between himself and his son, who probably no longer even saw him as a father. His heart began to twist with regret at everything that had happened.

And most importantly, why did Pico leave him alive? He had him right where he’d wanted him, but he’d left him alive. He almost felt guilty. He’d said so many terrible things to his son… and yet he had mercy on the sergeant. He had been a really shitty father, and even though he would never say it out loud, he knew he screwed up completely.

He was suddenly brought out of his thoughts when he heard a voice from the corner of the room.

“Oh, sir, you’re awake! Thank goodness.”

Captain jolted at the sudden voice, and turned his attention to its source. A particularly cheery medic stood almost creepily in the corner. He seemed a little too happy for someone who had to witness gory scenes on the daily. Ignoring the grim thought, the monochrome sergeant sits himself up further, still a little out of it after being unconscious.

“Fuck… I passed out, didn’t I…?”

“You certainly did. One of our soldiers found you while on patrol, crumpled to the ground in a bloodied mess!”

The captain didn’t like how the medic continued to smile as he said that grim statement.

“Uh… okay…” He rasped, and a thought crossed his mind. “Uh… did you ever find the guy who did this to me?”

The medic shook his head. “No, sir. They were long gone before we found you.”

Captain felt a wave of disappointment wash over him. His son was probably long gone now. It was a little sad to think Pico just left him alone to die, but… it was so much like him, wasn’t it?

His gaze hardened as he thought about that. It didn’t matter. Pico didn’t care, he’d made that perfectly clear. It was good that he was gone. That piece of shit deserved to go back to where he came.

Seeing how Captain’s expression changed to frustration, the medic shifted awkwardly. “Eh… well, now that you’re awake, someone would like to see you. I’ll go get him.”

Captain’s ears perked at the mention of a visitor. He looked up at the medic, about to ask who was here, but he was already leaving the tent swiftly. The sergeant sighed, letting himself lean against the bed. In the back of his mind, he was hoping Pico might have changed his mind and came back to see him. Maybe they’d make up. Maybe Pico would apologize.

No, that could never happen. They were both too proud to admit their wrongs. Their relationship was broken, and Captain knew it would be very difficult to fix.

“CAPTAIN!”

A voice from outside the tent cried, snapping Captain out of his relaxation. The monochrome sergeant snapped upright, immediately being hit with a wave of pain as he did so. The medical tent’s flaps open, revealing a tense soldier with worry behind his rounded goggles. As soon as Steve sees the other, he bolts towards the bed, wrapping his arms around Captain's aching body. The captain quickly reciprocated the hug, feeling comforted by his husband’s warmth.

“Cheese and crackers, Cap! Don’t fuckin’ scare me like that!” Steve hissed.

Captain couldn’t help but chuckle. “Don’t get your panties in a bunch, Sunshine, I’m okay.”

Steve pulled himself away from the hug, glaring at his partner with a frustrated expression.

“‘Okay’ my ass, John! I came back to the base after patrol, then heard someone beat you up and almost killed you!”

The captain tensed up at Steve’s accusing words, and the use of his actual name. Steve only seemed to use it when he was really pissed, and from his frustrated expression, the other man was probably seething.

“What the hell was going on anyway?! I heard almost half of the troop was killed by some ginger mercenary! We’re at a complete disadvantage against the enemy now! Damn it, John, what the hell were you thinking?!”

“I…I don’t…”

Captain hesitates, his usual haughty exterior faltering, trailing off as he runs out of things to say. He was already hurt, and his partner’s anger wasn’t helping. Pausing his rant to stare at the other, Steve’s expression softens as he sees the guilt in Captain's face. He takes a deep, slow breath, running a hand down his face to soothe himself. He then looks back at his husband, moving closer and gently caressing those tense arms.

“I’m just worried about you. It scared me is all, I just…” Steve pauses, then sighs. “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

Steve makes himself comfortable next to the captain, resting his head on his shoulder. Captain smiles, wrapping an arm around his husband’s back.

“I’m alive and well, Steve, don’t worry. He left me alive, that’s the only thing that matters.”

The monochrome sergeant places a gentle kiss on Steve’s forehead, making him smile with relief. Those words make the soldier think, however, and he looks back up at Captain.

“What happened, anyway? I was just driving the tank around, and I caught a glimpse of a little blue-haired boy singing with you, as well as a girl on some sort of… boombox. In all my years in this godforsaken warzone, I’ve never seen somethin’ like that.”

Captain scoffed upon thinking about Boyfriend. “Ugh… yeah. Some asswipe and his girlfriend fell from a plane and trespassed on the territory. We were gonna just kill them, but it was a boring day and I needed some action! Heheh, he was a pretty good singer, but fuckin’ annoyin’, I’ll tell ya that much.”

Steve chuckled at that, rolling his eyes and knowing how reckless his husband could be. ‘Heh, I’d believe it.”

“Heh heh, yeah,” The sergeant laughed. “He got really irritating really fast, so we decided enough was enough and I ordered a couple soldiers to prepare to fire. Can you believe that shit?! Hah! And at the last second, right before we were about to kill ‘em, they were saved by…”

Captain stops mid sentence, trailing off as he remembers seeing Pico again. His heart suddenly ached as all the memories came flooding back to him, the cruel words he’d said to his son, the fight, the pained look in his son’s eyes. Steve notices how Captain suddenly begins staring off into space. He gently pats his partner’s back, trying to ground him.

“Hey, earth to Cap. Everything alright?” He murmured.

The sergeant snaps his attention back to Steve. “Huh? Oh, uh, yeah, right… their um… their mercenary friend. He was the one who’d killed half the troops.”

He couldn’t tell Steve about Pico. He was probably the only one still emotionally attached to the kid. It made sense, Pico and Steve had always gotten along, unlike Captain and the boy, so it was hard for his husband to let their son go.

But Steve had… suspicions. What he’d heard and saw briefly of the mercenary guy matched a very familiar description. The soldiers who’d survived the massacre had explained to him that the young adult was a freckled, angry, gun-wielding little ginger with a green shirt and khaki pants, who Captain seemed to be familiar with. He wanted to deny it, he wanted to leave the memories behind like Cap had said… but he had to know.

Steve removes his head from Captain's shoulder, looking up at the injured man with serious eyes. “Hey, Cap…”

“...Yes?” Captain stiffens at the slight intensity in his husband’s voice.

“This may be a very strange and stupid question, but that… gunman. Was that… Pico? Did he come back?”

Captain blanches, his eyes widening.

“I… you… um, uh… it…”

“Cap.” Steve interrupts, his goggles baring into the other man’s exposed eyes. “Be honest with me. Did you see our son?”

Damn his husband’s fatherly intuition.

The captain stares at his soldier for a moment, not knowing what to say. How would Steve react? Would he be angry about what Captain had said to their son? No, it didn’t matter. Ever since Pico had gone, Steve had missed his child dearly. It had killed him when Pico had run away, but now he had a chance to know that he was alive and well.

Captain had completely screwed things up with his son, but he wasn’t about to make his husband feel the same way. He was going to make this right. So, taking a deep sigh, he spoke.

“Yeah, Steve. I saw him. It was our son.

Pico’s back.”