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It was a very, very bright day. Birds were most definitely singing (if that's what they were), and flowers were most definitely not blooming- why? Because flowers don't grow in sand, that's why! That's right, baby, we're at a beach right now. A makeshift one, if you will, but a beach nonetheless! It more so resembled an indoor pool, but it was furnished in sand, with a giant light acting as if there was a sun. The water was sparkling and moved via magic, truly giving it that ocean feel. Scattered about the place were things such as rocks, funky looking seashells- hell, there were even towels and umbrellas. Real authentic, which was just what Rouxls needed.
He puffed his chest out proudly, placing his hands on his hips. Today was long overdue for him, he knew that much- he'd always been running around and overworking himself. What's worse is he never really benefitted from it, so goodness knows what would've happened had he stayed for longer.
Rouxls took his first step towards the water and squat down, slowly dipping a finger in. It wasn't too cold, and it wasn't too warm. Calleth mineself Goldilockes the waye this is just righte! He stood up and clapped his hands together in an orderly fashion, practically beaming. All he needed now was a fitting wardrobe and he'd be set! Somewhat nearby was a small shack that sold just what he was looking for, so he obviously made his way over. It was run by an...oddly familiar Darkener.
"Aren't thou that one annoyinge star?" Rouxls asked accusingly, thinking back on TV World and his journey with the Lightners. Surely enough, his suspicions proved right.
"I am the original Starwalker. Your face is Pissing me off."
Offendedly, the taller man dramatically gasped and lurched backwards, hand clutching his chest. How absolutely, utterly, disgustingly rude! Pay no mind to his rather rude opening statement, no one speaks to Rouxls that way! He frowned and fixed his stature, clearing his throat with flare.
"Well excusay moi! I shan't be botherede with thy pesky remarkes and reclaimes! Handeth me a paire of shorts, worme." He flicked his hand towards the shop's wares and looked away with annoyance, nose high in the air. Within mere moments he felt something being placed in his hands:
A hot pink two piece.
His face flushed brightly as he looked down with an angry expectance, kicking sand around. Starwalker held that same look of 'I could care less' and turned around, reading a list of prices.
"That'll be. Like. 50 Dark Dollars." He deadpanned, holding one of his points out. Rouxls groaned, almost fighting back before realizing that this was his vacation. Arguments weren't going to hinder his day off, and neither will this absolute fool- in fact? That two piece? He was gonna rock that shit. So he handed off a fat 50, turned on his heel, and went to find a dressing room.
There was a single empty one amidst the small row of occupied stalls. He pulled the curtain back (which, really- shouldn't these be doors?) and worked his magic. Next to him, as he folded his pants neatly, he could hear the conversations from rooms next to him. He was no stranger to eavesdropping and decided to listen intently, sitting down on the bench behind him.
"I'm being serious! If either of you stage another shark attack, I'll-"
"Yeah, yeah- we hear ya, boss!"
"‧₊˚♪ 𝄞₊˚⊹"
"PLUEY do NOT say that-"
Rouxls was interested by this talk of a 'shark attack'. What could possibly lead up to this being a conversation? He listened some more, slightly pressing his hear against the wall.
"✩♬ ₊˚?"
"You're gonna get us banned, is why- I swear, I can't take you two anywhere!"
"Awlright now, you's two- we's here for fun, yeah? Quit the arguin', lets gedda move on!"
With that, 3 curtains opened in an impressive unison, and the mysterious inhabitant's voices slowly faded as they walked off. A few moments after, Rouxls remembered what he was there for, and slid the top piece over himself. Surprisingly, everything fit suspiciously well...but he didn't bother dwelling on it. He needed to find a good spot now, one away from others. There were only about 12 Darkeners, so it wasn't that packed. He stepped out with his belongings in hand, and made way for a nearby tree and grass patch. It was perfectly shady and cool, and someone had even left their book behind for him to read! Rouxls sat down and settled in, feeling relieved for once. The poor man hadn't even noticed how sore and stiff his limbs were once he finally relaxed, closing his eyes blissfully.
If not for the abundance of noise from the others, he really could've fallen asleep- right then and there. Instead he opted to picking up the book and flipping through the pages briefly. From what he gathered, it was a romance novel. Ah, fineth literature. He then read the backside's summary, frowning upon realizing it centered around divorce. Who willingly readse this nonsense? Have we losteth all dignity? Self value? Uncaringly, he tossed the book back in its place, thinking of other things to do.
He decided that he would save the faux-tanning for later, as well as building the finest sand castle he could. The water seemed like a good option, given the fact that it seemed to be perfect earlier. He sat up with a stretch, striding over to the shallows of the 'ocean'. Nearby were three darkeners, presumably the three from earlier, as they seemed to sound the same. They looked to be having some sort of water fight, which definitely goes against relaxation. Rouxls made sure to steer clear of them as he slowly walked in, right up until the water was waist level. Admittedly, being alone at a beach definitely leaves you a few less choices- what else am I to doeth here?
For just a few minutes longer did he stand there, trying to take in the sensation of just doing nothing. That is, until he felt something brush against his leg. Rouxls jumped slowly, rapidly looking around himself to no avail. Then another brush up. Another. Finally, he felt something bite him- and he yelped, almost falling completely backwards. Water flung everywhere as he tried to get away from the scene, but something now had his leg in a sort of 'lock'. He kicked fiercely, making quite the scene- one that attracted a very disappointed green Pippins who was being held up by a Zapper. He sighed and put a hand to his faced.
"Pluey. I KNOW you can hear me- unhand this guy." He spoke like a tired mother in her 40s, one who was sick and tired of her misbehaving children. And to his utter annoyance, nothing happened. He tried again.
"LET GO or you're sleeping outside again!" With that, Rouxls felt the force on his lower leg release itself, and next to him popped out a Shadowguy. He looked rather frantic as he swam over, supposed cat ears (?) bent back completely. The Zapper chuckled to themselves as the Pippins scolded the two, harmlessly bonking the Shadowguy over the head with his foot.
"We literally just talked about this, how are you real? Are you real? Because there's NO plausible way this isn't just to piss me off!"
"♩♪♫♬-"
"NO, nope! Nada, zip it all up, why dontcha?" He signaled for the Zapper to pick up the poor cat-adjacent man, and ordered to be carried off. Without even so much as a glance or apology, the three walked away, leaving Rouxls utterly confused and speechless. Well. Maychance the water lifeth isn't for mineself.
He slowly trudged out of the water and back to his spot, looking down at where he was brutally mauled. There were very faint indents of what looked like cat fangs, which would make sense all things considered. Already, this vacation was going south- he was offered a bikini and then got bit by some grown man. How does that even happen? Why? Whatever the reasons were, they would only further hurt Rouxls's head, so he figured a nice nap would do. He took his original long-sleeved shirt and draped it over himself, using his folded pants as a very thin, sad pillow. It was a little awkward in hindsight, but he didn't enjoy the idea of sleeping in public wearing no more than a hot pink two piece. What's next- he'd get a tramp stamp and 4 tattoos? Feature on an album with Ayesha Erotica? Maybe. Either way, he tried his hardest to ignore it as he drifted into a very uncomfortable nap.
-
"Oh my god, Pluey, I think you killed him."
What?
"Don't be ridiccy-less, boss- he's just sleepin'! Plues barely even did nothin'!"
WHO on this planet says 'riddicy-less'?
"Look at how pathetic this twink is and tell me a bite like that ISN'T fatal?"
"𝄞♩♪ :( ..."
TWINK? WHAT? THOU ARTE JOKINGE ME.
Rouxls sat up instantly, shocking all three voices. There was a yelp, an actual high pitched scream, and an array of off-tune brass noises. Despite how frazzled and tired the poetic pretty boy was, he was not about to liken himself down to a twink of all things! Something more dignified would work, like an author or professional planner! He glared at the small Pippins with all his might, who seemed quite shocked.
"I must haveth thee all knoweth- I am NOT a twinke! Keep thy ridiculouse claims to thyselves!" He pointed an accusatory finger at all three.
"...Ta' be fair, mista- you's is wearin' a b'kini." The Zapper coughed awkwardly, the Shadowguy giggling in high notes. Rouxls forgot that part. He covered the rest of himself with his shirt, slightly flushed and definitely mad.
"THAT DOTH NOT REGARDE THOU! SHOO! SCRAM!" He waved his hand at the group vigorously, watching as all three of them ran off and laughed like immature high-schoolers. Ultimately he sighed and relaxed, deciding it'd be best to just slip his clothes on over the two piece and resume his day. He wasn't keen on a nap anymore, that much was sure- so he figured that his last resort would be building a sand castle. A massive one. He picked an empty spot again, which wasn't too far off from his tree, and got to work.
It was a little outstanding seeing a grown man build a giant sand castle, but that didn't concern him at all. He was having fun flaunting his amazing creation, watching as children pitifully cried due to their much sadder, smaller castles. Hell, his was so large, he could walk in! And that he did, giving himself a little tour. It was his own ideal abode, with a master bedroom for himself, one guest room, and several rooms for all his puzzle endeavours. It almost impressed him, truthfully- but he already knew he was capable of such greatness. Rouxls allowed himself to linger for a little while longer before getting bored, stepping outside and realizing how much quieter it already was. Besides him and that annoying but beautiful polyamorous throuple, almost everyone had left. Perhaps that is mine queue as welleth...
It was getting quite tiring walking around, and Rouxls decided it'd be best to go home and take another fat nap- without being woken up rudely. So he left without even dismantling his obnoxiously large sand castle, feeling...maybe a little bit better than he did beforehand. He was still annoyed by the whole counseling debacle, which truly left a bad taste in his mouth, but not every venture will prove to be successful. Not even after the millionth time. When will this guy learn? Probably never, to be truthful.
All Rouxls knew was he hated being a counselor, and he somewhat disliked going to the beach. And that was all there was to say about it.