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"Wait, no you're kidding!" Angela covered her open mouth in shock, staring at her best friend with wide eyes.
"No bitch! I'm so serious!" Chanse said, tone on the verge of screaming. Angela burst into laughter, leaning into Chanse and resting her head on his shoulder. Chanse also leaned in, trying to compose himself, yet failing as he let giggles fall out of his mouth.
"Thats absolutely fucking crazy. Why have you never told me about this?!" Angela lifted her head back, practically screaming at Chanse over the loud music.
"I meant to!" Chanse opened his arms, laughing with Angela. Once they calmed down, Chanse rubbed his eyes and Angela began picking at her nails.
Her eyes started to wonder across the room when she & Chanse had fallen into silence. Standing out from the crowd in the corner, Amanda, who was hovering by the bar. Angela's heart skipped a beat as she saw Amanda flip her hair, nodding along to whoever was talking and keeping intense eye contact. Angela couldn't quite see who else was in the conversation over the crowd, but it didn't really matter.
Angela glanced down at her hands, picking at a new hangnail that had begun to form on her left middle finger. She used her right nail to pick it out, tearing at it until it hurt a little too much to go forward. Being in pain sucks, but it's better than thinking about her unfortunate crush.
"Wanna go get a shot?" Angela asked suddenly, turning her head back to Chanse.
"Yes please." Chanse whined, leading the two over to the bar. Chanse walked ahead while Angela staggered behind her best friend. The duo approached Tommy, who was working behind the counter for the beginning of the night. Angela immediately clocked that Tommy didn't look too hot. Well, he was as hot as he usually was, but his mind clearly somewhere else.
Why can I acknowledge that all of my co-workers are objectively hot, and that be it? Why does Amanda have to be the only one that I just can't move on from?
"Tommyyy! My boyyy, can you pleaseee get me and Angela another shott?" Chanse asked with a slight slur in his voice, stopping in front of the bar. He dug into his pocket, pulling out his wallet and shifting through it. He pulled out a $20 and put it onto the counter. Tommy turned around to grab shot glasses and alcohol from the back, bringing them onto the counter as Chanse put his wallet away.
Chanse and Angela grabbed their shots, clinking the glasses together before knocking back their heads. Angela felt the sting fall deep into her mouth and through her throat, down into her stomach. She grimaced at the sour taste left on her tongue, tilting her head back down to see Chanse with a similar expression.
Angela's mind whirred as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. She glanced at Tommy, who was in the process of slowly collecting the bill.
"We should kiss." Angela announced, turning back to Chanse. Anything to clear her mind.
"Alright," Chanse shrugged, and the two awkwardly leaned in. They pressed their lips together, and it was very odd. After a few seconds, they pulled apart and grimaced at each other. Tommy just stared between the two, a mix of shock and confusion on his face.
"Nope. Still hated that." Angela said, shaking her head. The two set their glasses back down on the bar, and Chanse nodded.
"Yeah, me too. I need to kiss a man after that." Chanse complained and Angela grimaced. She shouldn't have put him through that because she needed to get her mind off of Amanda. Which didn't even work, especially after glancing to the other end of the bar to see the tall woman.
Amanda, who nursed a small glass of red wine to their left while talking to Courtney and Shayne. The three were talking about god knows what, but it was clearly something serious as the volume of their voices rose and fell. It was likely something politics-adjacent, as it wasn't always the easiest to find people who share political views anymore. Amanda was thankful for her workplace being such a safe and welcome space, because in many other jobs she had, she would shy away from the topic as quickly as possible with co-workers.
"Tommy, will you kiss me?" Chanse asked, and Angela whipped her head back to stare at Chanse. Her gaze went between her best friend and their co-worker. Tommy looked up from the register with barely an ounce of shock on his face, which almost shocked Angela more.
"No. Chanse, being drunk doesn't make it okay to make stupid decisions. Be responsible." Tommy replied, the bite evident in his tone. He glanced at Angela, seemingly asking her to try and protect him. Tommy dropped his head again, finishing up at the register. Chanse rolled his eyes, groaning as he walked away. Angela stood for a second, attempting to mouth somewhat of an apology to Tommy. But when it was clear that he wasn't going to look up, Angela turned around and followed Chanse.
As she started speed walking to catch up to her best friend, she saw Damien sit down at the bar and begin talking to Tommy. She narrowed her eyes at the men, before turning back around and stopping behind where Chanse had stopped.
Angela tapped Chanse on the shoulder, causing him to turn around.
"I'm going to the bathroom. You gonna be okay?" Angela asked, receiving a nod from Chanse and a warm smile. Angela returned the gesture, turning around and navigating through the sea of people. Eventually, she found the bathrooms and looked debated which one to go into.
Opting for more privacy and space, Angela opened the gender-neutral door and locked it behind herself. Angela turned around, facing the sink mirror as she slid her body down the door until she felt herself hit the floor.
Angela brought her knees to her chest, sighing while hugging her legs and letting her head fall down. She shut her eyes tight, trying to ground herself. The loud, bumping music was not helping her calm, and neither was the alcohol. People always said that they used alcohol and weed to destress, to ignore their problems. Angela's problem was that they didn't help her problems. Substances just filled her with more anxiety and loudened her internal thoughts.
A loud buzz from her pocket made Angela jump, falling to her side. She caught herself with her left hand, firmly on the ground as her right picked her phone out of her back pocket. She looked at the screen, eyebrows furrowing slightly. Chanse !! 🌈 is calling appeared on the screen, with a background photo of the two of them from ages ago together.
Angela swiped the answer button, lowering the volume of the speaker before lifting it to her ear carefully.
"HELLO?! BITCH WHERE YOU AT." Chanse screamed over the phone, making it clear that she had still not lowered the volume enough.
"I'm still in the bathroom. Are you alright?" Angela asked, holding her phone with her right hand as she hoisted herself off of the ground. Once standing, she leaned back into the door and stared straight ahead, into the mirror and at herself.
"YES IM FINE! BUT YOU NEEED TO COME BACK OUT HERE!!!" Chanse whined. Angela checked the time on her phone, and it probably had been about six minutes of sitting there.
"I WANNA MAKE SOME BITCHES EMBARASS THEMSELVES WITH KARAOKE. PLEASEEEEEE?"
"Chanse. I'll be out in a minute. Wait by the bathrooms?" Angela explained, walking towards the mirror and wiping some smudged makeup on her face. She ran her fingers through her hair, trying to look as stable as she could.
"OKAYYY. LOVE YOUU."
"I'll see you in a second." Angela replied, pulling the phone away and hanging up. She dug the phone back into her pocket, still fussing with her appearance in the mirror. Eventually, Angela sighed and turned herself around, unlocking the door and walking out of the bathroom. Right when she exited the door, she felt herself collide with a larger mass, sending her falling back.
Angela felt an arm wrap quickly around her waist before she could fall into the floor. Being lifted up, she squinted her eyes open and looked at the heroic stanger.
And wouldn't you fucking know it.
"Shit, sorry Amanda." Angela stuttered, blinking hard a few times to ground herself. Okay. I'm here. In Amanda's arms. Great! Love this for me! I just need to find Chanse.
"You're good. Are you alright, though? You look a little flushed..." Amanda commented, loosening her grip and letting Angela stand on her own two feet. Angela felt herself almost pout. Physically pout her lips. She almost pouted like a child at being let go. Thank god Angela hadn't gotten blackout drunk yet.
"Yeah, I'm fine. You?" Angela asked, patting down her shirt. She brought her hands together, rubbing her thumb over the sore skin patches.
"I'm great. Hey, you wanna hang out with me?" Amanda asked, causing Angela to glance behind the taller woman. There stood Chanse, watching the whole thing. He wiggled his eyebrows, and Angela thought about the best way to murder her best friend.
"I would love to. But Chanse needs me. For... something...? I'll find you after though, if that works?" Angela strategized, already making a map & plan in her head. Of course she wanted to hang out with Amanda. She could never avoid Amanda. No matter what, no matter how much it would hurt her. A moth attracted to light, a bug attracted to fire, an addict attracted to their dealer.
"That's okay. Take your time, honey. See you in a bit." Amanda brought her hand up to squeeze Angela's shoulder, before turning around and walking away.
Angela stood firmly in the same spot she had been, diverting her eyes to look at Chanse. He had a mischievous grin on his face, causing Angela to groan and walk over to him.
"God, we need to get you laid. You need a love life outside of mine."
"Why is everyone so mean to me todayyyy?" Chanse whined, tossing his head back on annoyance as he began the walk and led the two towards the front of the building.
"We're not. Anyways, what are you planning on doing?" Angela asked, and the mischievous glint in Chanse's eyes only grew with added excitement.
"Singing time!" He giggled, skipping over to the DJ. Angela chased after him, coming to a halt behind him as he talked to the person at the table.
"... Sure. I can do a karaoke request list." The DJ nodded, glancing back down at their setup and adjusting a few odd spots.
"Yay! Can I have a microphone to tell people??" Chanse asked and the DJ hesitated, handing him the microphone wearily.
"Knock yourself out. Well, please don't actually. I don't really want to be liable in case of injury." The DJ clarified, likely remembering that some drunk people didn't pick up on social cues as well as they normally would. Or if they do at all.
Chanse smiled, grabbing the microphone with one hand as he stepped onto the stairs leading to the stage. Angela noticed a slight wobble in Chanse's step, and she ran underneath him and wrapped his arm around her neck. She helped support him, looking at his face (which did look quite grateful.)
"How many more drinks did you have in the seven-minute span of me using the bathroom?" She whispered, worry evident in her tone. Chanse only responded in giggles, and Angela felt way too sober all of a sudden. Still, they reached the top step, and she continued to support her best friend.
"ATTENTION! HEAR YE, HEAR YE!" Chanse yelled out into the microphone, slurring his words slightly and giggling. The conversations around the bar died out as the adults looked up to the stage, curious and a little startled.
"Ion't see NEARLY as much karaoke as we should. In fact, I see none at all. If one of y'all don't get up here and start singin' within the next five minutes, I'm literally gonna go badshit crazy." Chanse spoke, gesturing with his hands and the arm that wasn't being supported by Angela. Angela winced, feeling bad for Chanse. She knew how he'd react in the morning, and that was not a phone call that she was looking forward to.
Some people cheered and some giggled, a variety around the room. Angela let her eyes glance forward at the bar, making eye contact with Tommy. Tommy, who sat in the bar stool next to Damien. Tommy joined the former group in a cheer, and Angela glanced down at Tommy's left arm. Damien's hand held a firm grip on Tommy's bicep, and Angela had to bite her tongue to not giggle. She smiled as she looked away, having a good idea of what was going on.
When she glanced back in their direction as Chanse talked quietly to someone in the front row, she saw Amanda starting a conversation with the two. Damien dropped his hand and turned an endearing shade of red as Tommy and Amanda talked.
Trevor was the first one to volunteer, walking over to the DJ as Angela & Chanse walked off stage. Trevor requested a random country song that Angela didn't care much about. Chanse passed the microphone onto Trevor as the instrumental started, receiving an appreciative nod before he stepped on stage.
"Are you gonna be alright? I'm gonna go hang out with Amanda. You good? You wanna find, like, Spencer? Nerd out a bit?" Angela once they stopped by a wall. She regretted her words, she knew in that moment that talking to people was not what Chanse needed. He needed water. He needed an uber home.
"Yeah, that works. Bye bitchh!" Chanse confirmed, skipping away into the sea of people. Angela watched him walk away joyously, and guilt clawed at her. Chanse is a grown man. I don't need to take care of him just because he's drunk. Snap out of it, Angela.
Angela shook her head after standing still for a moment. Her eyes shot back to the other side of the club, where she made eye contact with Amanda. She carefully began weaving through people, approaching the tall woman.
"You alright, Ang?" Amanda asked once Angela had stopped in front of her. Angela smiled, letting giggles fall out of her lips.
"Yup! Fine and dandy!" Angela smiled, attempting to show it in her body language. Bad idea. She felt herself loose balance, just to be caught by Amanda.
"Are yo-" Amanda started, but Angela cut her off quickly.
"Yes! I wanna do karaoke." Angela said, glancing to her right. She saw Damien lace his fingers into Tommy, and the stupid lovesick grins that they both wore. Angela gestured at Amanda with her hands, telling her to come closer.
"Do they have something going on?" Angela whispered into Amanda's ear, causing a laugh to errupt from the taller, followed by a quick glance and nod.
"I'm about ninety seven percent sure, yes."
"I wanna make them do karaoke. Will you do a duet with me?" Angela asked, her mind scattering around slightly.
"I would love that, Angela. And I would like to see them do it as well." Amanda smirked, leading herself and Angela to stand in front of the duo. The duo, who haven't laid they're eyes off each other, and Angela wasn't feeling patient.
"Guyssss," She whined, letting herself slump slightly against Amanda. The two looked over, finally being aware of their surroundings.
"Me and Angela are gonna do a duo karaoke song and she wants you two to go next." Amanda said to them, and Angela nodded to back up her words. Amanda had a warm smile on her face, rivaling Angela's fake-sternness towards the boys.
"Together. Figure it out." Angela gestured to both Tommy and Damien, pointing her finger and moving it between the two of them. Tommy nodded, so Angela took that as a sign to pull Amanda away and towards the front of the club. Angela glanced up at Amanda, who had her head turned towards the two boys and was mouthing something that Angela couldn't make out. So she just glanced back down, finding gaps in the people.
"You don't have to keep holding me." Angela said, hyperaware of Amanda's hand that was placed firmly on her hip.
"I don't trust that you're stable right now." Amanda responded, helping them carefully navigate through the people.
"Mentally or physically?" Angela joked, laughing and tilting her head back. Amanda tightened her grip as Angela leaned back, and even Angela knew that she would've fallen without the taller woman.
"I meant physically. But I have been a little worried, you've seemed off tonight. Do you wanna talk about it?"
"Not right now! What song do you wanna do?" Angela dismissed the question as they approached the DJ stand.
"I'm not sure. I am in a theater mood right now."
"Dead Girl Walking?"
"Ooh! That's fun, sure! Can I be Veronica?"
"If that's what you want, for sure. She's not really in my vocal range anyways." Angela smiled as the two turned to the DJ. Angela noted that someone from Mythical that Angela hadn't talked to much was on stage doing karaoke.
"Hi! Could we do Dead Girl Walking from Heathers? The musical." Amanda spoke towards the DJ, who nodded as they clicked around on their computer. They glanced towards the stage where the person was finishing the song, throwing a thumbs up to the girls.
The stranger handed the microphone to Angela, who smiled and nodded politely. The person returned the gesture, before disappearing into the sea of bodies. Angela turned back and saw the DJ hand Amanda a microphone, looking at their many screens.
The two turned towards the stage stairs, Angela taking a deep breath to calm her nerves. Angela looked back up to Amanda staring at her, feeling her face warm up at the stare. Ready? Amanda mouthed, and Angela nodded.
The two stepped on stage as the instrumental started, and Angela felt the coldness that nipped at her hip once Amanda had removed her hand. Angela positioned herself to stand in front of Amanda, smiling softly for reassurance.
"The demon queen of high school has decreed it. She says, Monday, 8 a.m., I will be deleted.
They'll hunt me down in study hall, stuff and mount me on the wall. Thirty hours to live, how shall I spend them?" Amanda sang out, keeping her eyes closed as she warmed her voice up.
"I don't have to stay and die like cattle. I could change my name, and ride up to Seattle!
But I don't own a motorbike.. Wait – here's an option that I like. Spend these thirty hours gettin' freaky, yeah!"
Amanda's eyes opened at the end of the first verse, taking away Angela's breath. They kept eye contact as the world fell away, into the two of them in their own bubble. So in their own bubble, that Angela almost missed her que. Almost.
"Veronica? What are you doing in my room?" Angela sputtered out, Amanda stepping forward and putting her finger on Angela's lip, shushing her.
"Sorry, but I really had to wake you. See, I decided I must ride you 'till I break you." Amanda sang, tracing her finger down Angela's chin onto her chest.
"'Cause Heather said I've gots to go. You're my last meal on death row. So shut your mouth and loose them tighty whities!" Amanda pushed Angela's chest with her hand gently, making Angela stumble back.
Angela was so glad that JD didn't have many lines in the song, because she could barely keep up. The way that Amanda looked at her had her knees weak and made her slightly dizzy. Actually, the dizziness might've been the alcohol.
Amanda stepped closer to Angela as the song got more intense, looking at her like she was the only thing in the world. Like she meant the words she sang. Which was stupid, wishful thinking. Obviously. Stop thinking about it, Angela.
"And you know, you know, you know, it's 'cause you're beautiful. You say you're numb inside, but I can't agree. So the world's unfair, keep it locked out there." Amanda sang, cupping her hand under Angela's chin. The sweet softness gave a harsh reminder to Angela of where they were. That it wasn't really Amanda saying those words. Karaoke. I have parts too.
"In here it's beautiful, let's make this beautiful!"
"That works for me, whoop!" Angela sang back, stepping closer to Amanda and wrapping her arm around her waist. In a swift motion, she spun Amanda around and leaned over her. She fought to keep balance, using every single last ounce in her body to not drop Amanda.
Amanda's eyes were wide as they both breathed heavily, the guitar solo ringing out. Angela giggled, causing Amanda to as well.
"Hi." Angela whispered, a stupid smile on her face. Her eyes flicked from Amanda's eyes to her lips.
"Hi." Amanda whispered back, her grin matching the one on Angela's face.
Angela brought Amanda back up, straightening their bodies but keeping the lack of distance between them.
"YEAHHHHHH!~ Full steam ahead, take this dead girl walking!" Amanda sang out, the two singing their final parts in the song.
The ending was intense as their bodies flushed together, and Angela had to divert her eyes to calm down. Her eyes landed on Tommy and Damien, who were holding hands and walking towards the DJ stand.
"Yeahhh!" The two dragged out the last note, voices mixing together in perfect harmony. Their voices faded with the instrumental, finally opening their eyes to look at the other.
A few cheers came from the crowd as the girls stood there, breathless and sweaty.
Amanda turned, putting her arm around Angela's shoulders as they walked off stage. Angela was careful with her steps, and she couldn't tell if she felt more or less sober than before.
The two met Damien & Tommy at the bottom of the stairs, handing off the microphones. Amanda silently communicated with Tommy as she held Angela in her arms. Amanda gave her a tight squeeze as Angela's face dropped. She felt her breathing quicken as she started glancing all across the room, searching for something. Angela didn't even know what she was searching for.
"I need to go to the bathroom. You gonna be alright?" Amanda asked and Angela turned her head to the taller woman. No, she wasn't going to be alright. She didn't want Amanda to leave. But that's how she knew that she needed Amanda to leave. She needed space.
"Yeah. I'm. I'll be fine." Angela smiled, and Amanda squeezed her before walking away. Angela sighed, glancing around the room for a corner. A space.
Angela laid eyes on an empty corner, and just as she picked her foot up to walk over, she was thrown to the side by an encompassing force.
"ANGELAAAAAA!! YOUR KARAOKE WAS SO GOOOOOOODDDDD." Chanse slurred into Angela's neck, his arms wrapped tight around her shoulders. Angela's eyes went dark as her breathing picked up again. She shut her eyes as tight as she could, trying to ignore the pounding in her head.
"ANGELAAA." Chanse bugged, shaking her. Angela clenched her teeth, turning towards Chanse.
Chanse's eyes were red and he was extremely unstable. Angela looked at him, terrified. Looking at Chanse in this state, and fully leaning on her for support.
"Ch-. Chanse." Angela stuttered out, attempting to pull away from him. When he loosened his grip, he almost fell face first into the floor. Angela bent down and swooped him back up, supporting his body. She felt herself panic, and she started to feel small.
"Dad, please. Dad! Just lay on the couch. I'll get you water." Angela said frantically, begging her father to go into the living room. She grabbed his hand, pulling him in. He quickly swatted away her hand, and she jumped out.
Angela ran into the kitchen, opening the refrigerator and grabbing a plastic water bottle from the top shelf. As she ran back into the living room, she caught a glance of herself in the reflection. Her hair was still wet from her shower and the bags under her eyes were cut deep with exhaustion.
She ran up to her father, setting it on the coffee table beside him as he sat down. Angela moved back, standing to the side and watching her dad anxiously.
"Stop picking your nails, girl. Young ladies should have pretty, long nails. Not whatever fucked up shit that you've got going on." Her dad warned, his tone deep with bubbling anger. Angela dropped her hands immediately, unaware of the habit that she had been doing.
"Get to bed." Angela's dad pointed, taking a swig of water. Angela bolted upstairs, carefully closing her door. She moved through her room, the clock catching her eye. 1:21 AM.
Angela walked to her mirror, wiping the tears that she was unaware were even welling in the corner of her eyes. She stared at her reflection, warping in the dim light. Angela glaced at her desk, at the piles of homework gone undone. Two months into 9th grade and she could barely keep up, even at her performing arts school.
She shook her head to clear her mind, as her right hand subconsciously reached up and began scratching her left arm. She walked over to her bed, laying down while staring at the ceiling. Angela shut her eyes, trying to get some rest. Even though she knew that it would be to no avail. Not on nights like these.
"Chanse. I'm calling you an uber. Go find someone to wait outside with you." Angela said, struggling to get her phone out of her pocket with one hand.
"But why can't you hang out with meee??"
"Chanse. I fucking can't. Please go. I can't do it right now." Angela begged, tapping at her phone and clicking the button to pay.
"Three minutes. I sent you a screenshot of the car. Please, Chanse. Go home."
"Fineee. Since you hate me so much." Chanse whined, oblivious to the blow that caused on Angela. He straightened himself, turning around and stumbling towards the door.
As much as Angela wanted to help him, she physically couldn't. She bolted towards the corner, letting herself slide down the wall into fetal position. She brought her knees to her chest and held them tight, burrowing her head down in between the gap.
Guilt clawed at Angela. She felt it swallow her whole, consuming her with the deep darkness. She felt every movement, every mumble, every breath around her. It sunk deep into her veins, and she could barely breathe. She hyperventilated as the stimulation drowned her, tears prickling out of her tight eyes.
This is why Angela hated alcohol. Not only because it never really worked in 'making her let go'. Not only because of terrible past experiences. Not even because of how it made others act. It was because of how bad it made her spiral, and how hyperaware it made her.
Angela was never 'stupid' or rather 'impulsive' under the influence. It raised her anxiety, made her extremely quiet. Yet in return, she would have to be extremely loud to make up for the darkness that clawed through her insides.
Out of old habit, she felt her right hand start to scratch her left arm. Looped over, digging deep into her skin. It hurt like hell, but it was better than not being grounded. That's all she needed. To be grounded, so she could quietly escape the club. And no one would know the anxiety attack that she was definitely not having. She would be able to exit and not have to deal with anyone bothering her or faking that they cared -
A touch on her arm made Angela jump, her head shooting back and hitting the wall behind her. Her right hand shot up to the back of her neck, squeezing her eyes shut as pain rushed to her head.
She felt another hand reach to cradle her neck as Angela opened her eyes slowly. She blinked tears out of her eyes, trying to clear her blurry vision. Still, she knew who it was. She could tell from the touch, from the scent, from the aura. She could tell who it was when deprived of all her senses.
"Ang, baby..." Amanda cooed, kneeling on the floor in front of Angela. She rubbed her thumb along the back of her neck, soothing where it might be irritated.
When Angela finally cleared her eyes, she burst into tears almost immediately. She fell forward, sobs escaping from her lips. Amanda caught the girl, pulling her close to her chest and wrapping her arms around her protectively.
"Shh. It's okay, it's okay. I'm here, alright? I'm here, Angela." Amanda comforted, holding Angela close as she sobbed into her chest. Angela didn't really know why she was crying anymore. It was multiple reasons. Everything was too much.
The karaoke from Tommy & Damien echoed through the speakers, yet it was quaint. Angela felt herself relax into Amanda's touch after about a minute, being able to regulate her breathing more easily.
Angela pulled away, sniffling. Amanda pulled back too, sitting on her ankles as she looked at Angela with worry.
"Shit, I'm sorry. Your shirt's all wet." Angela giggled, causing a relaxed chuckled to come from Amanda.
"It's alright." Amanda reassured, a caring smile on her face.
"Are you? Alright?" She asked, tilting her head slightly. Angela just sighed, dropping her head slightly.
"Yeah... Yeah. I'm better now. Thank you, Amanda." Angela sniffled again, chuckling as she wiped her eyes with the back of her wrist.
"Okay. Let's stand up, yeah? Can you do that?" Amanda asked, lifting herself back onto the balls of her feet and holding her hands out for Angela. Angela nodded, taking her hands and ignoring the heat that flushed up her neck.
Amanda hoisted herself up, pulling Angela along with her. The two were face to face, holding hands with their bodies less than an inch apart. Angela looked up at Amanda, and she realized too late that she couldn't hide the love in her eyes.
Normally, Angela would run. Go for the hills, avoid even the slightest chance of losing one of her closest friends over a silly crush. But, Angela knew better now. Knew that it wasn't healthy or correct. Knew that she needed to change. To improve.
So, instead of running, Angela hugged Amanda. She flung herself forward slightly, wrapping her arms tight around Amanda's chest. Amanda stood stunned for a moment, before wrapping her arms around the shorter in return.
The two kept in a silent, warm embrace. Angela relaxed fully into the hug, and neither showed any signs of discomfort. Amanda swayed the two along to the slightly off-key karaoke ending to Baby, it's cold outside from Tommy & Damien on the stage, embracing the heat that radiated off their bodies.
"Hey, 'Mandy..?" Angela mumbled into Amanda's neck as the karaoke faded into the background, the last notes ringing out.
"Mm?" Amanda mumbled, her head dropped and resting on Angela's shoulder. Angela let out a shaky exhale, pulling away from the embrace. Amanda looked at her curiously, worry laced deep underneath.
"Can I, uhm. I need to be honest with you." Angela winced, trying to form the correct words. Amanda nodded silently, tilting her head with her eyes dead set on Angela.
"I, uhm. Fuck, there's no easy way to say this. Whatever. I like you, Amanda." Angela finally got out, looking back up at Amanda. She stood silently, looking down at Angela with a shocked expression.
"Ang... you're drunk. Do you even know what you're saying?" Amanda's words cut Angela deep, and she remembered why she always ran from her problems. Because of this.
"I don't lose my sensibility unless I'm wasted. I don't like going there." Angela bit back, stepping back slightly at Amanda's response. Amanda's gaze only flickered away once, towards the exit before she looked back at Angela. A quick, easy thing that most would've missed. But she knew Amanda.
"Honestly I don't even like drinking because I know it doesn't actually distract me from my issues but I try every time and hope for a different result-" Angela began to ramble in defense of herself, before she was cut off by Amanda.
"Angela."
"Amanda, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. Or any of that, for that matter. It's not your problem-"
"Angela-"
"We can just ignore this. Go back to normal friends, pretend I never said any-"
"Angela I swear to fucking god." Amanda cursed, quickly stepping between the distance the other had formed and cupping her cheeks. Amanda pushed her head down to Angela's, connecting their lips. Amanda closed her eyes, letting her lips slot perfectly with Angela's.
Amanda pulled away slowly, opening her eyes and looking at Angela. Angela stood there in shock, slightly slack-jawed. Her eyes were wide as her brain searched for a response. Yet, it was to no avail.
"Listen. I was just worried that you didn't mean what you were saying. That you were saying it on impulse, and you'd regret it in the morning. I like you too, Angela." Amanda explained, and Angela sighed in relief. She giggled pressing their foreheads together.
"Can I kiss you again?" Angela asked, carefully raising her hands to reach Amanda's neck.
"Please." Amanda confirmed, leaning in to press their lips together again.
Their lips met together in a frenzy of passion, tangling fingers in hair as they pushed their bodies together. The kiss was definitely less careful, releasing years and years of pent up feelings. Angela bit at Amanda's bottom lip, asking for permission. Amanda groaned in response, opening her mouth and driving Angela crazy. Angela let their tongues touch and explore, caught up in every sensation.
Angela felt every point of contact that they had, and it was driving her crazy. It was too little, she wished for more. Unfortunately, she was made aware of their environment by hearing distinct chatter that she had tuned out.
Angela reluctantly pulled away, staring at Amanda while breathless and stunned. The two caught their breaths, faces flushed with a hint of sweat that Angela felt on her hairline.
"Not here. We can't. You're sober, right? You can drive?" Angela asked, wiping her forehead with the back of her hand.
"Had one small glass of wine, that's it. So yes, I am sober. You wanna come home with me?" Amanda asked, sneaking her hand down and looping their fingers together.
"Yes please." Angela sighed. Amanda smiled, gesturing her head as she turned around and began to lead the two towards the exit. Angela followed close behind at they reached the door, keeping their hands locked together firmly.
Amanda pushed at the door, freeing them from the confines of the bar. Angela relaxed, letting out a large sigh of relief. Amanda chuckled slightly as she looked both ways, crossing the street to reach her car. She let go of Angela's hand once they were in front of the car, moving to the other side to get into the driver's seat as Angela entered the passenger door.
Angela opened the door and entered into the car, shutting it behind her. Amanda entered her side as Angela was shutting her own door, following in the same procedure. Angela sat there, fidgeting with her fingers as Amanda clicked her seatbelt. She dug into her pocket, grabbing her keys and turning them into the ignition.
Amanda put the car into reverse, backing up into the conveniently empty parking spot behind her. She glanced around at her mirrors, shifting back into drive and swiftly exiting the parking lot. The car began to beep, and Amanda looked up to see the flashing light.
"Ang, buckle?" Amanda commented, moving her body forward and looking to her sides. She turned the steering wheel, moving the car as Angela reached up to grab the seatbelt as well.
The car ride was quiet, a comfortable silence. The two were mainly just processing, figuring out what would happen. It took about 13 minutes to get to Amanda's house with traffic, only hitting a few red lights luckily.
Amanda soon pulled into her apartment complex, turning a few corners before parking in her designated spot. She turned the keys, stopping the ignition as she leaned back into the seat. She sighed, looking over to Angela.
"You awake?" Amanda whispered, causing a nod from Angela, who had her eyes shut.
"Mhm. Tired." Angela responded. She rubbed her eyes, turning her head to look at Amanda with a soft smile.
"Alright. We can go to sleep, just need to get inside. I'll let you borrow some of my clothes." Amanda said, unbuckling her seatbelt. Angela did the same, opening her car door and stepping out. The two walked out, Amanda holding her hand out with an open palm. Angela took it, letting herself be led around.
Amanda finally stopped in front of a door, pulling out a key and shoving it into the handle. It finally budged, and Amanda gestured Angela inside before her. Amanda walked inside, locking the door behind herself. She leant down, removing her shoes and leaving them by the doorway. Angela stopped, turning around, before following her lead.
Angela set her shoes next to Amanda's, and Amanda smiled softly. She would love to see that every day, their pairs of shoes next to each other in their shared home...
"Okay. Follow me, yeah?" Amanda said, walking past Angela and gesturing her head to a hallway. Angela nodded, walking after Amanda.
Amanda opened the door leading to her room, stepping aside to close it behind Angela. She walked over to her closet, opening it to show the hung-up shirts & hoodies. She kneeled down to open drawers, searching to find the smallest PJ pants that she would own.
Angela leaned over her, inspecting the closet. Eventually, she grabbed an old band tee then stepped back. Amanda straightened up, turning around and handing her the pair of fluffy pants.
"Might be a bit too big, but they're the smallest I own."
"Thats okay." Angela smiled, and Amanda smiled back. She grabbed another pair, a more worn pair of pants. She grabbed a hoodie that had been discarded on the floor, beginning to remove her clothing to change.
The two girls changed, and Amanda quickly sunk herself into her mattress. She pulled the covers over herself, extending her arms towards Angela.
Angela gladly joined Amanda in bed, curling up into Amanda's arms. Amanda wrapped her arms around the shorter, bringing them closer. Angela closed her eyes, nuzzling into her chest as she was made blaringly aware of the fatigue from the day. Amanda kissed the top of Angela's head, who would've had a reaction if it weren't for exhaustion.
"We're gonna need to talk about this, you know." Amanda said, rubbing the top on Angela's head.
"Mmmm. Tomorrow." Angela mumbled, nuzzling her face into Amanda's neck.
"Alright. Sleep well, baby." Amanda said, letting her eyes close as well.
"You too." Angela replied, letting her grip loosen as she felt unconsciousness creep from around the corner.
"I hate alcohol." Angela mumbled again after a moment, causing a light chuckle from Amanda.
"I get it."