Archive of Our Own ^beta

Kazutoshi flipped through a biology textbook out in the gazebo, the summer breeze at his aunt’s villa soothingly cool in the sun rays. The gazebo was always a nice getaway, at times when he wasn’t sharing the space with Ruiko whenever she came to visit, it was his personal hideaway.

“Ah, there you are, can you come to the foyer with me?” His aunt Yumi caught his attention from his book, hands politely folded over her lap. Kazutoshi wasn’t entirely keen on going anywhere, but following his aunt’s wishes was the least he could do as penance for taking up residence on her estate.

The inside of the mansion was much cooler, a shelter from the heat. Kazutoshi and Yumi walked in silence, as was typical, they never had much to chat about. She gently pushed the doors to the foyer open. Kazutoshi was confused for a moment, when he was greeted by the sight of an unfamiliar man near the door.

“Sorry for not consulting you about this, but you’re not getting much healthier undertaking all your own chores.” Kazutoshi didn’t like where she was going with this, he was perfectly happy doing things on his own. “So, I arranged a maid to accompany you and take on the tasks you’ve otherwise been completing on your own. Unlike the other ground’s staff, he will be your personal assistant. Do be nice to him please, he’s your age so I hope you get along.”

Kazutoshi was going to open his mouth in protest before he was distracted by a polite bow and delicate words.

“M-my name is Ken Hasegawa, I hope my services will be of use to you in the future.” Ken held his bow for a few moments to try and gauge the atmosphere.

“I-“

“Shh. Escort him to the servant chambers please, we may talk after this.” Yumi cut him off before he could say something insensitive.

Kazutoshi felt like he wanted to pop a blood vessel.

--

After both of Kazutoshi’s parents were murdered when he was young, his aunt moved into the family home from the city to watch over him. While their relationship was always somewhat strained, and Yumi was naught as equipped to deal with Kazutoshi’s wealth of health problems, they were both content to live in parallel.

For as long as Kazutoshi could remember, he had been mostly self-sufficient. Other staff did their own thing, but when it came to things like personal laundry, keeping his areas clean and tidy and cooking his meals, Kazutoshi preferred to do it himself.

And yet now, without his consent or input, his aunt had gone and hired him a maid to start doing those things for him. Some crap about how “they wouldn’t be able to know if any of the remedies Kazutoshi had been taking were working if he kept tiring himself” and “the doctor said your condition had been worsening”.

He wasn’t a goddamn baby, he could do these things himself. He had stormed off after a particularly heated conversation with is aunt that day before holing up in his room for the rest of the evening.

The morning after, he lied awake in his bed, watching the hours tick by through the sun rising over the estate. He sat up at a knock on the door.

“Yeah? Whose there?”

“It’s just me, Master. May I come in? I’ve brought you some tea before breakfast.” Ken politely echoed on the other side of the ornate wooden door. Kazutoshi had to think for a moment, he supposed something like tea wasn’t so bad, usually he just hauled himself out of bed to make food.

“Fine, come in.” Kazutoshi remained polite, as long as Ken didn’t overstep, he figured it would be okay. The door slowly opened, allowing Ken to wheel in a silver cart. The wheels of the cart rubbed against the long hem of his skirt, almost brushing against the floor.

“Good morning Master, did you have a good night’s rest?” Ken posed meekly, clearly eager to undertake his duty of care, but anxious, nervous, Kazutoshi could see the beads of sweat on his hairline. Ken was still feeling the effects of yesterday, having heard – along with a few other workers who were helping him unpack his belongings in the servant quarters – a few bits here and there of what could barely be called a conversation between Kazutoshi and his aunt.

It was an issue bigger than just Ken himself, in a vacuum nothing was his fault, he was just being paid to be here. But Kazutoshi didn’t know where else to direct his upset.

“As good a rest as I can get these days.” Kazutoshi bleakly replied, trying to suppress a wince as he sat up in bed.

“Do you need help getting out of bed? I can assi-“ Ken strode over to the bedside.

“-No, I’m fine. Just- get the tea.”

“Ah, of course, my apologies.” Ken walked back to the cart, carefully pouring a cup of tea from an intricate porcelain teapot into a dainty cup. “This morning I’ve brought an English breakfast blend, most English breakfast flavours are not consistently the same due to its nature as a blend. It’s a combination of black teas, most commonly Assam tea, Kenyan tea, and Ceylon tea. The blend you’re being served has a higher content of Ceylon tea, giving it a more balanced rich flavour while cutting some of other black tea’s natural bitterness.”

Kazutoshi could only nod as he watched Ken pour the tea gently, making sure not to splash any droplets onto the saucer. His eyes seemed to subtly sparkle when explaining the tea he was serving. The cart moved closer to the bedside, Kazutoshi sitting on the edge of the mattress.

“Thanks.” Kazutoshi replied curtly, occupying himself with his tea while Ken left to fetch some clothes from his wardrobe. Choosing a few polite pieces for Kazutoshi to wear while being mindful of the warm weather.

After finishing his tea, Kazutoshi stood to start unbuttoning his nightwear, falling to the ground unceremoniously.

“Would you like some assistance with changi-“ Ken tried to prompt.

“Look, Hasegawa. I have no fucking clue what my aunt told you. But you’re hearing this from me okay?” Kazutoshi put the cup down on the cart. “Don’t just blindly eat up whatever sob story she probably fed you. I’m not a fucking baby alright? She’s probably given you a long ass list of things you need to do but I’m telling you to stop. If it were up to me, you wouldn’t even be here.”

“Uhm, I apologise I- is there anything you would like me to do then? I was planning on washing the curtains if that was alright?” Ken fiddled awkwardly with the hem of his apron.

“Shit I dunno, go play in the garden or something. Just stay out of my business. I’ll handle the curtains. I’ve been washing my own curtains for the past few years.” Kazutoshi huffed.

“I- I still have to escort you to breakfast though. We prepared-“

“I can go myself.” Kazutoshi stood from the bed, pulling on the clothes Ken had laid out for him. “Now leave, you’re dismissed, just, go.”

Ken stood frozen for a moment, before quickly grabbing the cart and wheeling it towards the door. He hurriedly curtsied.

“O-of course, Master. Sorry. Have a good rest of your morning.” Ken left the room and shut the door, a tight breath escaping his chest once he was alone. His new job was going to be an uphill battle.

By the time Kazutoshi left the room, Ken had long since scampered off. He moseyed down to the dining hall, posture tight, feeling annoyed. By the time he arrived, in his usual seat was a prettily arranged plate covered in lacey netting to keep the warmth in.

He sat, pulling the lace off. A small side plate with a few supplements and a glass of water. The scones were warm, fresh and steamy on the inside, served with what he recognised as jam made on the estate, beside carefully peeled slices of mandarin. Kazutoshi felt… somewhat remorseful for chasing Ken off like that.

He ate in silence.

--[In the garden]

“Excuse me? Would you like some help out here?” Ken skittered out into the expansive garden, approaching a rather tall woman trimming hedges.

“Hm? Oh, you’re the new guy, yeah I’ve got some stuff you could do but you’re sure you don’t have anything else to be doing?” The woman responded, flicking her red ponytail over her shoulders as she wiped the sweat from her brow.

“Well, I realistically should have a proper assignment… although, even though it’s only my first day, I don’t think the Master and I are getting along very well. He was-” Ken folded his palms awkwardly over his apron.

“-Insistent he didn’t want your help? Sounds like Toshi alright. I heard you were brought you in to be his personal maid? Like doing his laundry and that kinda shit. How much did she tell you about Toshi?”

“Enough for me to get the gist of his situation. I’d realistically like to be able to assist, but even in the few interactions we’ve had he’s quite certain he doesn’t need my help even though his problems sound quite serious.”

“Look, I’ve been around here for a while and… with Toshi, you gotta give him some time and space to warm up to you. He’ll be pissy but it’s usually not personal, if he gives you any real problems I’ve got your back but, he’s prickly.”

“Ah, thank you…?”

“Mai. And you’re…?”

“Ken, it’s good to meet you.”

“Now that that’s out of the way, I’ve got some shit for you to do.”

--[Yumi’s study]

“I just don’t get what you’re not understanding here. I can handle this myself, I don’t need a maid to run around after me.” Kazutoshi crossed his arms over his chest, leaning back against the chair in his aunt’s study room, watching her facial expressions closely.

“Kazutoshi we’ve spoken about your doctor’s reports many times, it’s highly recommended that you stop exerting yourself as much as you do if we want to curb the amount of episodes you have. You need to stay in good shape if you want to inherit and run the family business long term.” Yumi rubbed her temples with her fingers.

“And then what? Just sit inside all day and waste away like I’m on fucking death row?! I don’t need someone babysitting me, I’m fucking nineteen.”

Yumi sighed, rubbing her palm against her forehead.

“Tell you what, we can have a compromise. One month, you will give Hasegawa one month. That is all I ask of you. If after a month you are still certain you want him gone, then we can arrange his dismissal, but for goodness’ sake at least give him a chance.”

Kazutoshi clicked his tongue, thinking.

“Fine. But a month is all you’re getting, and don’t get your hopes up.”

[Week One, Wednesday. Kazutoshi’s bedroom]

Despite their scuffle on the first day, Ken was still back on the second day to bring Kazutoshi more tea before breakfast. However, unlike yesterday, Ken didn’t attempt to make nearly as much small talk. Setting the cart down by Kazutoshi’s bed to go and fetch a new daily ensemble from his wardrobe.

“Today I’ve prepared you a ginseng tea before breakfast. Despite being called a tea, it is not made with tea leaves. Ginseng tea is brewed with the root of ginseng plants. The tea you’re being served this morning has been brewed with an imported panax ginseng from China. Unlike ginseng from the American regions, ginseng cultivated in Asian regions, notably China and Korea, have been reported to have stronger effects in improving blood circulation and aiding in fatigue relief.”

When Ken looked towards Kazutoshi he seemed to be staring at him.

“A-ah! I apologise, I got somewhat carried away.”  Ken bowed quickly, setting down Kazutoshi’s day clothes on the end of the bed.

“…Whatever.” Kazutoshi dragged out, sitting up on the edge of the bed to sip on his tea.

Ken waited politely and quietly for Kazutoshi to finish. The awkward air in the bedroom somewhat stifling. When he set his empty tea cup down, Ken cleared his throat.

“May I… escort you to breakfast this morning?” Ken fidgeted with his hands while he waited for an answer. Kazutoshi thought about yesterday, he thought about the breakfast that waited for him on the table, he thought about what his aunt had asked of him regarding tolerating Ken.

“Alright. Yeah, sure.” Kazutoshi said meekly, resigning himself to whatever Ken had planned. Though, he could feel the subtle cheer radiating off of him from not being denied unlike the day before.

“A-alright! We’ll leave after you’ve gotten dressed.” Ken wheeled the cart back to the door, standing near the wall and looking away out of respect for Kazutoshi’s privacy as he got dressed.

He could hear him fiddling with the buttons on his shirt, Ken pondered the things Yumi had told him. The things Kazutoshi struggled with. He thought about the effects of multiple sclerosis on fine motor skills, he wanted to step in and help, it was his job, this is what he was here for. But he knew when there was already a very delicate air between the two of them, he feared asking might upset Kazutoshi again.  

After a few minutes Kazutoshi was ready to leave, and the two walked down to the dining room. Ken waited patiently for Kazutoshi to be seated, politely standing next to – yet behind – his table seat.

“Today’s breakfast is smoked salmon on avocado and sourdough toast, accompanied by fresh watermelon and pear. The salmon was brought fresh into the estate before you arose and were prepared on site.” Ken finished, waiting for any kind of response.

“…You know, it feels kinda weird you just lingering behind me like that. Sit at the table so this is less awkward.”

“Huh? B-but I couldn’t-“

“Yes you can because I just told you to.”

Ken cleared his throat.

“O-of course, excuse me.” Ken sat at the first seat to the right of the table from the head where Kazutoshi sat in kind. It was definitely a better deal than standing for a while, but he still felt out of place being seated at their dining table.

“Y’know just out of curiosity, when was this baked?” Kazutoshi prompted, it was just a health thing, he always wanted to make sure the food he ate was fresh to avoid as much bacteria as possible. When Ken sat down, he could see this weird glint in his eyes, like there was something he wanted to say, he gave him an out to speak about what was on his mind.

“This morning it was baked by the chef. She arose around three AM to prepare the dough to proof for a few hours in time to be baked before you awoke. Sourdough has a quite short proofing window, no less than an hour and no more than four hours at room temperature. The reason why this is the case is because when gluten is developed through combining flour, water, and yeast, the starch and glutenin molecules start expanding and connecting which begins the structural development process of gluten, allows dough to be stretched and kneaded due to trapping gasses inside its web-like shape. Gliadin develops within the webs which helps the dough hold its shape despite its elasticity, maintaining a balanced texture while not completely losing all firmness. These three molecules maturing over a few hours is what gives bread its fluffy and soft texture. Over ferment a dough and the bread will be dense when baked, under ferment a dough and it will have large air pockets where the gluten hasn’t been able to develop-“

Kazutoshi stared at Ken as he rambled.

“A-ah! I apologise Master! I was getting ahead of myself…”

“Oh… no no, it’s fine. You’re pretty knowledgeable. Got any other kinds of facts up your sleeve?” Kazutoshi prodded, listening to Ken ramble was better than eating in silence like he usually did.

“Well… a lot of things here and there, learning is fascinating and enjoyable. It’s actually part of the reason why- ah, sorry.” Ken cut himself off before he could elaborate.

“Wait, what? It’s part of the reason you…?” Kazutoshi pushed. Ken sighed, figuring it was too late to backtrack.

“It was part of the reason I was scouted for this job in the first place, while my homemaking abilities are average, the Mistress thought that my wide array of knowledge might be useful in handling your unique circumstances.”

Ah. So that’s what this was about. Kazutoshi suppressed a groan.

Kazutoshi was already mad at her, since Ken had arrived, it felt like a breach of his trust. For long Yumi had seemed fine with Kazutoshi being independent around the estate, then suddenly out of nowhere – without his input – decides to get what is essentially a health supervisor disguised as a maid. Better yet, would go on to spill all of his sensitive health secrets to him despite not even knowing him.

He felt betrayed and gross, he’d already felt like his life was slipping out of his control since his parents died but things just seemed to keep getting worse. That he wasn’t trusted to take care of himself, that he wasn’t even awarded the privilege of being the one to disclose his own issues to someone.

Although, he did feel a little guilty having taken out some of his frustration on Ken yesterday morning. Nothing was his fault, and his desire to help Kazutoshi seemed genuine. He just didn’t know where else to direct that pent up frustration, and Ken happened to be his easiest target.

But he was still certain he didn’t want him around for long, just knowing his aunt had hired him a glorified babysitter behind his back put him off enough. He just wanted some solitude.

He finished his breakfast in relative silence for the rest of the meal. Ken would try and weasel some more work out of Kazutoshi, but would inevitably give up, retreating back to the garden.

[Week one, Saturday. The garden]

The cool breeze gave Kazutoshi the perfect opportunity to hang up some damp bedsheets he had laundered that morning. He always kept the clothesline strung up with how frequently he hung items up. Fragrance strong and stains always scrubbed out, even if scrubbing with the brush repeatedly made him a little tired.

Up on a small stool to reach the line, he tossed the sheets over, the fabric fluttering gently in the slow wind. Kazutoshi admired the way the white sheets glistened in the sunlight.

The stool under his foot wobbled a bit, his lean slightly heavier on one foot. He tossed another sheet over, straightening the fabric out so it didn’t dry with heavy creases.

The stool wobbled again, the shaking feeling made the inside of his skull feel a little swimmy, like his brain was submerged in jelly. Oh, that’s probably not good. His arms were a little sore, but he had one more sheet to toss over.

The sun was quite glary and hot, his forearms throbbing a little. He breathed deeply, trying to catch his breath after suddenly losing it, feeling like no matter how much he inhaled, he wasn’t getting enough oxygen.

Kazutoshi’s ankle tipped off the stool, tumbling onto the grass.  

When he awoke, it was to a darkened bedroom and staring at the canopy above his bed when he opened his eyes. He sat up in confusion, is head throbbing.

“A-ah! Master you need to lie back down!” Ken outstretched his palms to try gently guide Kazutoshi back down into the bed.

“S-shut up. I’m fine.” Kazutoshi grunted, wincing at the pain on his tailbone – probably a slight bruise sustained after his fall – as he tried to shuffle out of the covers.

“All the laundry you were hanging has been taken care of, please just- get some more rest. I need to make sure you’ve properly recovered. Do you remember what happened before you fell?”

“I dunno, my head was kinda heavy then I just fell. It’s not the first time that kind of thing has happened, I feel fine, now just let me-“

“Master I can’t let you get up right now.”

“For fuck’s sake Hasegawa stop treating me like a goddamn baby. I’ve lived this way my whole fucking life, you don’t just get to decide now that the way I’ve done my business this whole time is wrong.” Kazutoshi huffed, hands scrunched up in the sheets in his lap.

“I-“

“If what I was doing really was so bad I’d be dead right now, I don’t care what your job is, I feel like I’ve made it clear what I think of it.”

“I just-! I don’t understand why you seem so- so… so certain in denying people trying to look out for you! Even if it’s in your best interest! I’ve only known you for a few days, and I- I don’t know what it’s like to be you but… it’s so frustrating seeing you try to refuse even the smallest favours.”

Kazutoshi stared.

“Ah-! I apologise, I’m so sorry for raising my voice like that Master I- I promise I’m not usually like this.” Ken stood and bowed his torso deeply, hands clasped in his lap.

Kazutoshi paused for a moment.

“Hasegawa… can I… be honest for a second?” Kazutoshi meekly spoke.

“Yes…? Of course Master.”

“Sometimes it just feels like people take one look at me and think I’m an incapable child. Y’know? So you show up, and your whole purpose is looking after me. It feels like my aunt has given up on my independence.

And then she goes and shares all my weaknesses and secrets with you, something I got no say in. It just feels like the more that the years go by, that people start giving up on me. And it’s like, if they don’t think I can do it, why should I even bother trying to get better? I just want to go about my business, who cares if it makes me feel worse?”

“I don’t think that way of you at all Master, I just… think maybe it would be okay to accept help from the people closest to you, even if it’s only a little. There’s no good reason why you should give up on recovery, sure it’s something that sticks with you forever, but it shouldn’t be something you force yourself to brave alone.”

Kazutoshi pondered for a moment.

“I don’t want to overstep when I’ve already trampled on so many of your boundaries already but… how about you go about your business while I wait nearby? N-not as like a babysitter or anything! I wont interfere or anything like that… just in case something happens.”

Kazutoshi thought about the offer for a moment.

“…God, fine. But don’t think you just get to storm into my life like it’s no big deal. Don’t hover over me.”

“A-ah, alright. Also Master, could you… call me Ken instead? Hasegawa feels… a little formal.”

Kazutoshi considered.

“Whatever, Ken.”

The rest of the day was spent with Kazutoshi polishing the windowsills, while he chatted with Ken about everything and anything. Ken would bring him some ice when his fingers seemed inflamed from continuous scrubbing.

[Week two, Tuesday. Kazutoshi’s bedroom]

Unlike the previous week, Ken didn’t knock before entering Kazutoshi’s bedroom. He quietly wheeled the cart of tea in with a neat letter placed beside it. He gently opened the curtains to let slivers of light in, the sun letting Kazutoshi’s body know it was time to awaken.

“Good morning Master, I’ve organised a checklist for today, if you’d like to assist me with some chores after breakfast.” Ken smiled, working in parallel allowed Kazutoshi to continue his routines, while Ken got to be nearby in case something happened.

“Mmm… yeah… cool…” Kazutoshi wiped the sleep from his eyes.

The two fell into what had become a usual routine for them. Passing the time, waiting for Kazutoshi to get dressed, while Ken stared at the wall.

“Oh, and don’t forget to respond to that letter.” Ken promptly reminded.

“It’s just from Rui, I don’t need to respond when she says she wants to come visit I don’t give her permission. She’s just telling me when she’s gonna show up, there’s no choice here.”

“O-oh. I see…? Is she your friend?” Ken responded awkwardly.

“I guess…?” Kazutoshi thought, he’d give her that credit. “She’s the kid of a big transport company so we were introduced pretty young. I dunno, guess she’s been around for a while.”

They sat in silence for a few moments while Kazutoshi gathered himself before the two went down to the dining hall.

They spent the rest of the day waxing hallway floors, the polished marbled shimmered, although the both of them did have to catch each other from almost slipping.

[Week two, Friday. Kazutoshi’s bedroom]

“-Ouch, fuck, Ken that shit hurts.” Kazutoshi winced as Ken rolled his sore palms in his fingers. Sat on his bed while Ken sat beside him.

“If it hurts, then it’s working. Your joints feel like stone, your palms are as cold as ice, it’s like the exact opposite of the other day, you were on fire and now you’re completely chilled.” Ken huffed, pushing through Kazutoshi’s discontent as he massaged him.

His palms had just locked up mysteriously while eating breakfast, Ken had insisted he feed him the rest of his meal, that he couldn’t allow him to continue the day on an empty stomach. Kazutoshi had to reluctantly agree if his rumbling stomach was anything to go by and he knew Ken wasn’t going to budge. Ken had made it incredibly clear the other day that he was not going to let Kazutoshi neglect himself.

But in a weird way, even though this was Ken’s job, even though he was being paid to care, it made his knees weak. Being so attentively looked after. It made Kazutoshi feel stupid, he’d been so against Ken’s entire existence a little over a week ago, yet now that he stood his ground for caring about him, had seen the innermost workings of his life and hadn’t run away, it amazed him how the two of them clicked so fast.

“I’ll draw a hot bath for you tonight, that might help in relieving some tension in your hands.” Ken moved to massaging Kazutoshi’s other hand. “Since you aren’t in good shape, leave any daily chores to me. We got in a delivery of some new books yesterday if that might keep you occupied?”

“I’d argue bleaching the kitchen counter is easier than turning pages with these hands.”

“I’d rather you didn’t exert yourself.”

“And last I checked I don’t take orders from you.” Kazutoshi teased.

“I seem to have your better interests in mind Kazutoshi, so if anything maybe you should be listening to me.” Ken smugly commented back.

The two paused for a moment.

“A-ah! I- I- I’m so sorry Master I didn’t mean to-! I’ve just been speaking with other staff who you’re much closer with a-and they refer to you by name so I must’ve just- it must have just snuck it’s way into my vocabulary I’m so so sorry.” Ken covered his mouth in embarrassment, the tips of his ears turning crimson as he stood and bowed profusely.

“Uh- yeah, no, you’re all good, it’s fine, don’t worry about it.” Kazutoshi coughed into his hand nonchalantly. His heart in his throat. He was busy engraving the way Ken said his name into his brain permanently.

The two would end up both in the library reading through anatomy books and books detailing the economic history of Kazutoshi’s family. A long archive of books regarding their humble beginnings over a century ago. Ken would end up realising later he had completely forgotten all about his daily duties, too busy getting absorbed in the pages with Kazutoshi.

--[The bathroom]

“Let me know if the bath is too hot.” Ken folded up some towels to lay on a rack to the side of the immensely marbled bathroom. The large bath basin built into the ground so Kazutoshi had an easier time getting in and out, water lapping at the top, threatening to spill up onto the floor.

“I can handle a bit of heat, I usually don’t take my baths this hot, but I’ll be fine.” Kazutoshi waited for Ken to leave the room to undress, whenever he had to bathe he would wait firmly outside the closed door.

Stepping into the bath, the scalding water crept up his skin as redness spread rapidly. The water had a nice scent from magnesium salts, and like Ken had said, the hot water helped relieve the stress in his hands right away.

Damn the water really was hot.

He played with his hair, laving it soothingly through his fingers. He enjoyed playing with the long strands, loathe as he was to admit that to literally anyone. It reminded him of his parents, brushing his hair when he was a child, still carefree.

God the bath was so hot, his heart throbbed in his chest.

It was actually the first time Ken drew the bath on his own, the last few times another attendant had been there to help him to show him what to do. Kazutoshi wasn’t entirely sure where the major temperature discrepancy came from but considering that Ken told him how despite being hired as a maid that he wasn’t spectacular at domestic business, he wasn’t all that surprised.

“Ken… are you still there?” Kazutoshi groaned.

“Y-yes? Are you okay?”

“’s hot.”

“Do you need some help?”

“……I dunno.”

“I’d prefer a yes or a no…”

There was silence.

“If you don’t answer I’m coming in.”

More silence.

Ken opened the door.

Kazutoshi leaned over the edge of the bath, breathing softly as he let his torso feel the cool tiles of the bathroom floor. Somewhat annoyed that Ken had come in, but understanding regardless. Ken knelt down next to the basin, hauling Kazutoshi’s head into his lap to fan him with the closed book he had been reading.

“I- I’m so sorry.” Ken bit his lip, his entire skirt by now soaked both by the puddles of water on the floor and Kazutoshi’s wet hair in his lap.

“’s fine. Bath was good, I don’t-“ Kazutoshi sighed for more breath. “-really get to take hot baths. It was nice, putting aside this shit, it was nice. Just maybe not again.” Kazutoshi looked up at Ken from his lap, now that he was getting a closer look – as hazy as his vision was from the heat – Ken was quite pretty.

“Okay.” Ken affirmed. They still had a lot to learn about each other.

“Ken… would you…”

“Would I…?”

Kazutoshi wasn’t as sure anymore, if he still didn’t like Ken very much just on the basis of his position. They seemed close, but was that because they were close, or because Kazutoshi had just started tolerating him more as a staff member? That maybe Ken was right, it’s not a bad thing to let someone care.

But, why would anyone care this much about him if they weren’t being forced to do it? Surely if you pay someone – like Ken – enough, they’ll do anything. Even spend time with someone as – in Kazutoshi’s own eyes – as unpleasant and pessimistic as himself.

“Nothing, don’t worry about it.”

After the two cleaned up, Ken would bring some books to Kazutoshi’s room for them to read together while he cooled down. The two sat side by side on the edge of the bed before Ken bid him goodnight.

[Week two, Saturday. Kazutoshi’s bedroom]

“Fuck off Ken I can do this myself.” Kazutoshi tried to wave Ken off, who awkwardly fiddled with his apron while he fussed over him. “You’ve got stuff you do, but this is something I can literally do on my own.”

“Your hands still aren’t doing well, and you’re- it doesn’t look easy doing your buttons.”

They argued in a back and forth for maybe five minutes.

“God fine! Will you be pleased if I let you do them?!”

“I would actually! Now shush and let me do my job.”

Ken knelt down to do each of Kazutoshi’s buttons carefully and slowly. His blouses had a nice bit of flow to them with how small his frame was, he tried not to look up and make the situation a little awkward as he tried to be zeroed in on each small golden button. Kazutoshi always had this small flush on his face whenever Ken fiddled with his clothes recently, it made him wonder if he was overstepping. Not in the way he was initially with his boundaries regarding his illnesses, but in a more… intimate yet awkward way.

“I… don’t hate you Ken.” Kazutoshi murmured, almost inaudible.

“H-huh? That was a little sudden… And either way I didn’t think you did so… it’s no big deal.”

“I dunno, I just feel like I’m angry a lot. Just making sure you knew I don’t hate your guts or anything.”

“Admittedly your life changed quite suddenly after I arrived. I was thinking about our conversation the other day and… I felt a little guilty. Sometimes I wonder if me… losing my cool, pressured you into sharing sensitive things you feel.” Ken’s gaze was downcast solemnly.

“Well I- look, it’s stuff I don’t usually talk about. I was mad and you were mad, we were both mad okay? By nature we aren’t compatible, I wanna do things my own way, your job is to do things your way. But… you’re okay. We’re okay. And, clearly we can make things work, if you can meet me in the middle.”

“This feels like you’re saying things for my sake again…”

“God shut up, trying to have a moment here!” Kazutoshi balled up his fists, but his tension assuaged when it was met with a short chuckle from Ken. “But yeah, no, we’re fine.”

Ken smoothed out the ridges of Kazutoshi’s clothes, a polite white and blue suit ensemble. Kazutoshi seemed a bit irritated around the collar but he figured he’d unbutton it eventually when he got sick of it.

“Alright, if you’d like to wait down in the gazebo, I’ll escort Lady Tamba out to you when she arrives.”

Kazutoshi nodded, leaving on his own to go wait outside in their usual spot. Before long he was greeted by;

“Well, well, well, look who finally showed up.” Kazutoshi groaned.

“Hey! Be grateful I came to visit you instead of forcing you to come see me like last time.” Ruiko strode across the garden to the gazebo, the lacey edges of her green dress catching against the small tufts of grass that grew between the cobbled stone of the pathway.

“I- I’ll bring the two of you some refreshments, excuse me.” Ken bowed politely before scurrying away back into the manor.

“Who’s the new guy?” Ruiko sat at the clothed table, leaning on her elbow. With how many times she and Kazutoshi had met up, she was pretty familiar with the on site staff members.

“Oh that’s just Hasegawa, he’s my ‘new personal maid’ or so my aunt says. For doing housework and shit, as annoying as that is.”

“That would be awesome to literally anyone else, you’re just obsessed with cleaning.” Ruiko sighed.

“And what about it? I sleep easy on the crispest bedsheets the world has ever seen.”

--[The kitchen]

“Ah, thank you so much Tsuno.” Ken reached down to pick up the silver platter in between his somewhat sore fingers – from work.

“Don’t even mention it, the second I heard she was coming I made sure to make heaps of apricot danishes, she totally loves them.” Tsuno wiped her brow with her forearm, hands covered in flour and sleeves rolled up to her elbows.

“Does Lady Tamba visit the Master often?” Ken inquired.

“Every few weeks or so, he doesn’t get out much so I’m glad they socialise. Although things have gotten a little better with you around, he seems a little more comfortable instead of being holed up.” Tsuno commented.

“You think so? I still worry we don’t get along very well, even if the worst of it was over a week ago…”

“Sure maybe he’s still a little rough around the edges but he’ll soften up if he hasn’t already. Anyway! I gotta help out with some archival paperwork so I’ll leave you to it. Say hi to Tamba for me!” Tsuno hurried off after washing the flour off her hands.

“I will!”

--[The gazebo]

Ken politely and slowly approached the table again, pacing himself not knowing the right time to announce himself as Kazutoshi and Ruiko chatted away.

“Wait something smells good.” Ruiko turned her head, giving Ken a good moment to quickly skitter up to the table awkwardly.

“A-ah, thank you for your patience. I’ll be back later to collect the dishes.” Ken laid out the teacups and plates of small treats. “Also your medicine is on the saucer, please actually take it this time and I will be checking.”

“God it’s gross, where do you guys even get this, my last doctor always made sure they tasted nice.” Kazutoshi grimaced, pushing around the paper slip with his fingertip, the paper wrapping up a small powder dusting which was always acrid and bitter, making his tongue curl in uncomfortable ways.

“If you don’t want to take it then don’t complain to me when you need me to carry you around everywhere.” Ken huffed.

“I’ve seen you work out after hours I’m sure that would be a piece of cake for you.” Kazutoshi prodded.

“I think you’re severely overestimating how strong I am.” Ken awkwardly fiddled with the edges of his apron.

“C’mon, thought being at my beck and call was in your job description and you don’t even think you could carry me around?” Kazutoshi playfully continued, chin resting on his palm as he looked up.

“If it’s what my Master wants, I’d be happy to negotiate my contract and stipend to fit this new responsibility into my role if I am to become his chauffer.” Ken teased jokingly, his laugh gentle and soft.

“Y’know I’m still right here.” Ruiko coughed into her hand, Ken seemed startled, scrambling to adjust himself.

“A-ah! I apologise! Excuse me, please enjoy the afternoon.” Ken hurried away with his head slightly hanging low.  

“You guys are pretty close.” Ruiko tapped a finger against her chin expectantly, eyeing up Kazutoshi’s changing expressions while he struggled to form how he wanted to respond.

“He’s barely worked here for like two weeks, there’s no way we are as ‘close’ as you think we are.” Kazutoshi deadpanned, unamused at what he knew Ruiko was suggesting. She seemed to gravitate to those sorts of “juicy” or gossip related topics, so it wasn’t anything Kazutoshi wasn’t used to her talking about.

“Yeah but you’re usually more… respectfully but you’re usually pretty rude or blunt. I dunno, you felt normal for a sec there. Also, I’d be more grateful if I was you, there are people – me – who would kill to have an awkward guy in a maid dress waiting on them hand and foot.” Ruiko reached over the table to shove a danish in her mouth, speaking while half chewing.

“I’m changing the subject because you’re making it weird. You coming to the harvest banquet?”

“Is that even a question? Of course I’m coming! I had a new dress made for it that should be arriving soon so I’ll make sure to steal all the attention.”

Ugh that just reminded Kazutoshi that he needed to have his measurements retaken for his new suit. The last thing he wanted to do right now was see the tailor, that sounded like shit, he would rather sit butt naked on hot concrete in his humble opinion.

“Cool just making sure I won’t be totally alone once I’m done talking to old farts who just want to worm their way up the ladder. I should probably make sure I’m somewhat informed on sale routes or whatever, maybe I’ll ask Ken about it, he’s got all sorts of knowledge that I didn’t really expect from a maid.”

“Ken?” Ruiko leaned forward slightly.

“Hasegawa, sorry- Hasegawa.”

“Hmm, I see…”

“Shut up.”

--[Week Three, Monday. Library]

“You… want to study a bit about your own family history? With me?” Ken stepped back a bit in disbelief, gently tucking the feather duster he was holding under his arm as he rearranged a few books on the shelf in the library as he carefully balanced himself on a ladder.

“Well- not study but like, just a refresher. The harvest banquet is next week and I’ve gotta mentally prepare for all the old dudes who are gonna want to talk to me. Technically the business isn’t even fully mine yet, they’re waiting until I’m twenty but, in name it’s still me.” Kazutoshi approached one of the bookcases, fishing a few books off the shelf.

“I’ve heard about the harvest banquet itself, well, just a little in passing, my family and I live a bit further outside of the city, so I’ve never really seen any of the festivities related to the harvest season.” Ken fiddled with his hands awkwardly.

“The market is the biggest part mostly, it’s mostly to celebrate-“

“-The opening of the biggest northern trade route. It helped the Kamimura family trade textiles and books across the country which stimulated the local economy. It’s interesting to think a family and business this big had such humble beginnings shearing sheep.” Ken chimed in with his own bits of knowledge, he opened one of the books he grabbed, setting it onto the table. Ken stepped down from the ladder, pulling up a seat next to Kazutoshi at the table.

“Well, yeah pretty much. Though the sheep was a pretty small thing at first, real growth started happening after silk and cotton since while it was a bitch to make it was easier for seamsters to work with and make clothing.” Kazutoshi continued.

“If I may, what was the purpose of the books? It’s been something I was curious about.”

“From what I know they invested in a local printing press to have books made about their weaving and sewing techniques, so they could preserve the knowledge of their skills and stuff. It just kinda grew from there. Though…” Kazutoshi trailed off.

“Though?”

“My dad, actually. He had heaps of horror books made, he would reach out to authors out in the countryside like crazy. Anyone he could find that wanted to write and publish books, he’d help. My dad was pretty hype about those kinds of thriller novels, there’s a copy of every single one he had made here in the library…”

Kazutoshi paused.

“-I like reading them sometimes.”

They were silent. Ken desperately wanted to say something, but what to say? Would reassuring him be too pushy? Would carrying on like normal be insensitive? Would asking what happened be an invasion of privacy?

“…You should show me some of your favourites, I’ll read them when I have some free time.”

“O-okay.”

They were quiet for a little longer before Ken broke the silence.

“Also I wanted to remind you, we’re going to visit the seamster tomorrow and have your measurements double checked. The harvest banquet is next week and from what I’ve heard it’s already very late and I’d hate to trouble the seamster. I-if you don’t mind, I’ll be accompanying you as your escort.”

“Ugh, I hate that guy.” Kazutoshi scowled.

--[Week three, Tuesday. Employee chambers.]

Ken scribbled quietly at the desk next to his bed.

Dear Mao,

I think this might be the longest we’ve gone without contact, it feels weird being away from home for so long. Before you get nervous, I’m doing alright. The other staff members are friendly, and my employers treat me well, even if we had a… somewhat rocky start. I’d like to believe we’re on friendly terms now even if we got off on the wrong foot, trust me though, the rumours about him being somewhat disagreeable and abrasive are absolutely true.

It’s been weird getting used to my work, it’s not too much or anything, I’m just unfamiliar with homemaking duties. If anything, it leaves me puzzled that there weren’t better candidates than me for this job, but my employers seem fine with my performance. Please let me know soon if my first payslip arrived safely, I feel awful not being able to contribute to the household a little closer to home, but the pay is good, and the work environment is nice.

I’m actually being given the opportunity to work during the harvest banquet, it felt like such a distant occasion back home, but now that I’m working at the heart of the festivities, it’s gotten quite busy, and the master is quite nervous. Is it weird I’m actually excited to see what it’s like? I’ve heard a lot about the city festivals, but I never imagined I’d ever get to see something as exclusive as the banquet itself, I’ll make sure to commit as much as possible to memory and tell you all I can – if I’m allowed to.

With love,

Ken

He folded the letter over and into an envelope, sealing it up with the drops of a wax candle. Kazutoshi had chased him off earlier to get changed himself for their outing, giving Ken the chance to quickly finish penning a letter to his older sister. He set it down on the nightstand before pulling a small draw out from under his bed to find the clothes he wanted to wear for the day.

--[The foyer]

“God what is taking him so long.” Kazutoshi deadpanned, the carriage waiting outside for the two of them to get into town for his fitting appointment. He tugged annoyedly at his waistcoat, he had noticed it was laid out on his bed with a note from his aunt that she’d like him to wear something nice if he was going out in public.

Now that he thought about it, this would be the first time Kazutoshi would ever see Ken in something that wasn’t his work uniform. That for once his frame wouldn’t be swathed in a long sweeping skirt or the frilled sleeves and flare of his white apron.

Although he did catch Ken once outside working out late into the night – though to Kazutoshi that didn’t count because instead of seeing him “dressed in something else” he was more seeing Ken “working out in a shirt that left little to the imagination” but it was only for a few moments before Kazutoshi scurried away before Ken could notice he saw.

“I’m so sorry I’m late I was just finishing up writing a short letter I’d like to post when we make it to the city.” Ken hurried into the foyer with a briefcase in hand, carrying some of his personal items he may need on the journey as well as the letter to his sister.

“O-oh, yeah no, that’s fine.” Kazutoshi coughed into his hand, forcefully tearing his stare away from the polite brown suit Ken wore, the blazer carefully buttoned, giving his figure some sharpened edges.

“Ah, good, I’d hate to be a bother.” Ken dipped his head a little low, his cheeks warm seeing Kazutoshi in his fitted navy waistcoat, he usually dressed far more casually around the manor, so it was weird in a good way to see him more formal.

“Let’s get a move on, trust me if you make the tailor wait for more than a minute he turns into a piece of shit.”

Ken didn’t ask but happily sat next to Kazutoshi in the carriage.

--[On the road]

“The scenery outside the city is really beautiful, it’s crazy to think you actually live here.” Ken admired the passing rolling hills and fields outside the window.

“You would’ve seen it on your way here.”

“Honestly I was a total nervous wreck, I was too busy freaking out to look outside.”

“What, scared of me?” Kazutoshi eyed Ken next to him with a teasing lilt, noticing the way he would ball up his hands in the ends of his clothes whenever he seemed anxious.

“I had no experience in this field, and I was terrified I’d mess up of course I was nervous!” Ken squeaked, pouting ever so slightly. “You have no idea how scared I was that it was over after just the first day I thought you hated my guts.”

“If it helps, I didn’t hate your guts. You’re-“ Kazutoshi paused, carefully considering what to say. “-fine.”

“Well, I could’ve assumed so. I figured if you hated me that bad you would have gotten rid of me by now.” Ken sighed in relief. Kazutoshi thought of the month he promised his aunt, he had almost forgotten about it. Time spent with Ken just seemed to pass naturally these days.

“You’re pretty hard on yourself.” Kazutoshi commented, unable to mask the concern in his voice.

“I don’t think it’s a… bad thing, to acknowledge your weaknesses.”

“Yeah well, if it’s anything, I think you’re pretty good.”

They fell into a gentle silence for a few minutes before Kazutoshi broke it again.

“If it’s not weird to ask, I’m curious actually, why do you wear the dress uniform? There is a pants option.” Kazutoshi asked genuinely.

“O-oh, it’s just a more practical shape to support an apron which comes in handy during cleaning tasks. That’s really it.” Ken answered honestly.

“Makes sense.”

They were quiet again.

“Actually, I wanted to do something really quick. I asked about your favourite horror books the other day, and while I’ve yet to receive a good recommendation I’ve read through the first pages of this one which I chose off the shelf and it seems intriguing so far. Would you like to…?” Ken opened up his case to fish a hardcover book out that he brough to read on the ride to the city. He opened up to where he had read to, scooting over slightly to be a little closer to Kazutoshi, an invitation.

“Sure, why not.” Kazutoshi slipped a little closer, the two balancing the book on each other’s legs.

The rest of the ride was spent reading along together, despite it being a book Kazutoshi had read countless times on his own, he enjoyed seeing Ken react to his favourite parts. The way his hands would tense up when something big happened, or the way they’d chat while Ken tried to figure out certain plot points and predict the story.

They didn’t care when their fingers touched when tracing over certain words when discussing characters, the company felt comfortable and gentle, paired well with the cool breeze that drifted through the carriage.

A stray rock on the padded dirt pathway caught under one of the back wheels, causing it to jostle slightly as the roads turned from dirt to cobbled stone as they drew closer to the city. The slight jump of the carriage pushing them closer together, shoulders bumping and thighs sliding against each other.

The carriage was quiet after the book fell to the floor, neither speaking, just awkward throat clearing.

“S-sorry Master I was sitting too close-“

“No no, it’s fine, it’s whatever. Don’t worry, it’s no big deal.”

“Ah, okay, if that’s alright, sorry.”

They fell quiet again.

“H-hey, Ken. If it’s cool, can you… not, call me Master?” Kazutoshi leaned against the edge of the carriage, chin in his palm as he stared outside.

“You don’t like it?”

“Makes me feel old as shit for one. But… I think I’d prefer it if we were a little more, normal. Good and all that you like your job but, I think I want us to be normal.”

Ken sat and thought for a moment, what was “normal” supposed to mean? Did Kazutoshi consider them friends?

Ken dipped his head down low, the idea that Kazutoshi saw them as friends, not just employer and employee, made him pleasantly embarrassed. His company was good? He liked being around him? Even if this was just conjecture Ken’s mind was conjuring up, he was somewhat elated.

“Sure, well I mean, you already call me Ken so…”

“Kazutoshi is fine.”

“Okay, Kazutoshi.”

He liked the way his name sounded when Ken said it.

The carriage slowed to a stop once they finally entered the city, the air filled with the sound of the street bustle. The chauffer got down to open the door and let the two of them out, avoiding passersby on the crowded road.

“Let’s get out of here, it’s crazy busy, and I wanna get this appointment over with as fast as possible.” Kazutoshi put his palm on the small of Ken’s back as he guided them across the familiar street, ducking down someplace less busy to make the final stretch to the boutique.

It was times like these where Ken noticed the little things in Kazutoshi’s demeanour. The way he’d pick the skin on his lip when he was anxious, or how he’d fiddle with the ends of his sleeves.

“Let’s head in, I’d hate to keep the seamster waiting.” Ken stepped up to the door to push it open for Kazutoshi.

-[Inside the boutique]

On second thought Ken would have been happy to piss off the seamster, he was an ass.

“Fuck, don’t pull the tape so tight.” Kazutoshi complained while up on the pedestal. He had to shed his coat and shirt for measurements so Ken was respectfully turned away. Thankfully they were tucked away in a private room in the back of the store, so they didn’t have to worry about any normal customers seeing.

“If you didn’t keep losing weight I wouldn’t have to pull it so tight. God forbid I don’t want you walking around in clothes with the shape of a chicken feed bag.” Nakamigawa chewed on the tip of a pencil in his mouth, switching between measuring and scribbling down on a clipboard.

“Well shit should I pray for the sickness fairy to take away all my problems? I can’t control how inconsistent my weight is, live with it.”

Nakamigawa clicked his tongue in annoyance, turning away to fuss at his workstation. Grabbing a new piece of paper to holster onto his clipboard, furiously sketching.

“How do you feel about wool? I was thinking keep the waistcoat vibes but a floor length suit jacket with a fleece lining to wear on top.”

“Itchy.”

“It’s gonna be cold in the evening while also honouring your family history, do you just have no zest for the self-communication that fashion provides?”

“Look okay if you think its good just do it, that’s your job.” Kazutoshi deadpanned, unamused.

“Then you aren’t allowed to complain if you don’t like it, you ungrateful brat now get off the pedestal go play with fabric or something and tell me what you want it made out of.”

Was this normal? Ken was trying to figure out if this was normal, he looked back slightly, trying to decipher what the hell was going on.

“Also who is this guy? He has the radiant energy of a rained-on dog and pets aren’t allowed in the store.” Nakamigawa pointed to Ken in the corner with his pen. Kazutoshi scoffed.

“That’s just Hasegawa, he’s my-“ maid “-friend. So what I can’t bring company?”

“I mean, is there a reason why he’s here? He’s kinda sad looking I feel bad, that suit is just, it’s wearing you more than you’re wearing it. It’s nice but the lack of confidence is cramping the style here. Are you like, his new boy toy or something? Are you going to this banquet too? Because I’m not letting you go looking like that.” Nakamigawa sized Ken up from behind his sunglasses, raising and eyebrow.

“O-oh, no no no, I’m not-“ Ken turned around from facing the wall, waving his hands awkwardly.

“Get up on the pedestal, I can make this work.” Nakamigawa snapped his fingers a few times to hurry him up.

“I promise I’m not-“ Ken protested, looking over at Kazutoshi for some kind of help, but he seemed to busy himself in a pile of fabric samples, leaving Ken to fend for himself with the snarky seamster on his own. Once he was herded up onto the step, Nakamigawa sized up his figure.

“You’re built pretty well, the fit would be nice if the blazer wasn’t totally swallowing up your figure. It’s nice but, something thinner would be absolutely fabulous to show off more of your shape.” Nakamigawa fiddled with the buttons on Ken’s blazer, a signal to take it off. “Wool with a satin lining… admittedly it is a pretty nice blazer. You just…”

“I just…?”

Nakamigawa sighed. “Disrespectfully, you have this awkward demeanour which totally cramps your style. Clothes are an extension of who you are, but it totally kills the whole ensemble if you can’t wear them like you mean it. That’s where I come in, I make you something that helps your true self shine, but you have to make the ends meet. If I’m gonna go all out, you need to stand a little more proud.”

‘This guy is unsufferable’ Ken squished the thought as he could only sigh deeply. Nodding along with whatever Nakamigawa said, it was easier than causing problems let alone with Kazutoshi present.

“Look, I’ve been trying to tell you I’m not going to be at the harvest banquet.” Technically he was, but just to work, to serve the banquet and to supervise the garden party. He even already had a special uniform that had been given to him to wear during his service.

“Yeah yeah whatever but I’m already inspired so I’m gonna mock something up anyway. I’m not forcing you to order it if you don’t want it, as ungrateful as you seemingly are for my work.” Nakamigawa huffed, annoyed but he understood what Ken was saying.

“Yeah I’ll… pass. Thanks.” Ken stepped down and hurried off, his briefcase bouncing against his leg with every somewhat annoyed step. “I’ll wait outside the boutique, I’ll be there when you’re ready.”

“Cool, yeah, all good.” Kazutoshi nonchalantly waved him off, following Nakamigawa up to the counter to sign some paperwork.

“What’s his deal?” Nakamigawa scoffed.

“You mad that not everybody will just stand there and take your shit?”

“If you can’t handle the heat stay out of the kitchen.”

“Whatever.” Kazutoshi signed off on a sheet of paper. “The funds will be delivered by the accountant, feel free to bash my door down if the payment doesn’t arrive in time. Also, another thing… about… what you had in mind for Hasegawa.”

“Oh?” Nakamigawa’s interest was piqued.

Kazutoshi signed a few extra bits of paperwork before leaving, promising that someone would pick up his new outfit the day before the banquet. Leaving the store without any fanfare.

“Is everything sorted?” Ken tilted his head down to look at Kazutoshi.

“Yup, just gotta remember to tell someone to pick up my stuff before the banquet. Anyway, you needed to post a letter?”

“Y-yeah, to my older sister. I haven’t talked to her since I moved into the manor which surprisingly I think is the longest we’ve ever gone without talking… So she’s definitely overdue a letter from me.”

“What’s your family like? I feel like we talk a lot about me, so I wanna hear about you.” Kazutoshi shoved his hands into the pockets of his trousers for a bit of comfort while he walked the slightest bit in front of Ken, guiding him to the nearest post office.

“Well that’s because it’s my job to know about you.” Ken shrugged.

“Well too bad because I wanna know a bit about you too. You have a sister?” Kazutoshi turned his gaze down to the pathway to feel a little less awkward, kicking a stone across the road in front of him.

“Y-yeah. Her name is Mao, we’ve kind of been inseparable since we were kids. She’s working as a journalist for our city’s local paper at the moment, it feels pretty weird to not read it. I used to pick up every biweekly issue that she wrote in, so this is my first time in a very long time not reading it.”

“What does she write about?”

“Kind of anything at the moment, but she got a lot of recognition after her report on a missing persons case that she helped solve. Work’s been pretty slow now that things are calmer, it’s why I was willing to move pretty far for work, I want to support her and my mom.”

“That’s… really nice of you. I don’t really know what it feels like to be close with a sibling being an only child and all but, I’ll make sure you get to visit her at some stage.” Kazutoshi nudged Ken’s shoulder playfully.

“Thank you Kazutoshi, I was totally worried you were going to try lock me up into indentured servantry forever and never let me leave.” Ken lightly nudged back, sarcastic and playful.

“I think other staff members would beat my ass if I did that, I really enjoy this fun thing called ‘treating my employees like human beings’ that a lot of other business moguls seem to not like. You weren’t scared? You had no idea whether I was or wasn’t gonna lock you up in indentured servantry. You didn’t know heaps about me I could’ve been a total freak…” Kazutoshi trailed off mysteriously.

“It was a stab in the dark but I definitely got pretty lucky. I won’t dwell on the past though, what matters is that we’re here, and you’re a good person. If anything I think you treat me better than most.” Ken hummed thoughtfully.

“You think so?” Kazutoshi inquired thoughtfully.

“W-well, you aren’t exactly eating breakfast every morning and talking about your private life with every single one of your employees. O-or letting them sit on your bed and reading with them. Or-“

“Yeah yeah, I get it. Maybe you do get special privileges. What about it? Don’t like them?”

“Oh- no no of course not. If anything, I’m very grateful for you Kazutoshi. I was… scared. Coming to a place I’d never been before, to meet complete strangers and work a job I was barely qualified for. But you- you make me feel like a normal person. I was petrified of what it meant to work directly under someone but you’ve never made me feel like less than I am.”

Kazutoshi was quiet while he processed. Ken was still filtering what feelings in his head were appropriate to say without scaring him off.

“S-sorry! Was that too much?” Ken hunched his shoulders slightly, bashful.

“No, no. That’s- it’s all good. For me it’s kinda the same. I was so mad at my aunt for getting me a maid that I took it out on you. But you didn’t give up on me and…” Kazutoshi tried to supress a sniffle.

“If it’s not too forward, would it be weird to say I think we’re friends? We talk and spend time together, normal time, even if it’s in my uniform, I’ve never really had someone as close to me as you that isn’t my sister, admittedly a lot of kids growing up thought I was a little strange. But you’re amazing Kazutoshi.”

“Y-yeah?”

“W-well-! Only if you want to be friends!” Ken added shyly, his cheeks rosy and warm while the palms carrying his briefcase were sweaty and awkward.

“Of course I’m cool with us being friends. If anything I thought we’d already been friends for a while.” Kazutoshi huffed, crossing his arms over his chest and praying that didn’t sound too eager. “Or are you gonna tell me how much you hated me?” Kazutoshi raised an eyebrow playfully.

“Not nice, I have literally no reason to hate you.”

“Phew, check that off my list of anxieties.” Kazutoshi finished pleasantly. They fell into a comfortable silence after, the rest of the walk spent in quiet, save for the bustling street around them.

“Actually, Kazutoshi, can I ask you something? I was curious but, why don’t you call me Ken in front of others? When we’re talking with someone else you’ll only call me Hasegawa.”

“Why do you care?”

“I don’t but-! I was just wondering…”

“I just… don’t want people getting the wrong idea about us.”

“But what is the wrong idea? I don’t understand.”

“This isn’t your business Ken, drop it.”

Ken quietly thought for a few moments.

“Okay.”

--[Week three, Thursday. Kazutoshi’s study]

“Did you just fucking get me again.” Kazutoshi leaned back in his chair.

“King is caught by the rook and your only escapes are pinned by the knight, that’s checkmate.” Ken sat back after surveying the board.

“God I really just can’t beat you can I?”

“W-well, if it’s anything, it’s really hard to play against someone with not much understanding of strategy. It’s really unpredictable.” Ken lowered his head bashfully.

“Don’t sell yourself short you’re really good.”

“I’ll teach you a few things sometime, if you’re familiar with a few common openings you can work from there.”  Ken folded up the chess set, slotting it carefully back into one of the bottom drawers of Kazutoshi’s desk. His words a slight invitation, a promise of future ventures alone in the study – for chess of course.

“I completely forgot I was here to sort books…” Ken got up suddenly, brushing off his skirt as he turned back to the large redwood bookcases. He pulled an older somewhat dusty book off the shelf. “You keep encyclopaedias in here?”

“Course I do, all kinds of things are in here. Invested in the kind of fish I’m reading up on?” Kazutoshi leaned forward onto the mahogany desk, his chin sitting on his palms.

“I actually have a lot of these at home, especially oceanic books. I wasn’t really the type of kid to play around in the river or lake but I still wanted to be familiar with the ecology. Whereas the ocean was always really exciting and mysterious because I’ve never been, so me and the old lady who runs the library go way back.”

“I’ve been to the beach a couple times when I was a kid on y’know, family holidays, but honestly? Coastal regions are hot as hell, the sand is hot, the sun is hot, and I sweat so bad and you’re still finding sand in your clothes months later. I get the hype but nah.” Kazutoshi sighed.

“That sounds…” like sensory hell actually.

“You hate being too hot or itchy right? Sand is so itchy and the sun is always burning.”

“H-huh? I- well, I’d prefer not to be too hot but I’m sure I’d manage.”

“The other weekend when it was hot as hell you were kinda fiddling with your uniform a lot around the neck. You don’t need to pretend like you’re fine if it’s too hot or uncomfortable.”

“It- wouldn’t be appropriate to disassemble my uniform while working.”

“Ken, you don’t need to endure sensory hell just to work. If it’s too hot just unbutton the top. I just- take care of yourself, you work fucking hard around this place I feel like the least I can do is let you know you don’t have to feel like shit when you’re doing it.”

Kazutoshi got up from his desk chair, walking up beside the bookcase. He reached up to pop open the top two buttons on Ken’s collar on the top of his dress. His eyes followed along a droplet of sweat that fell down Ken’s neck now that his throat wasn’t trapped in the lace.

“Were you sweating that whole time?” Kazutoshi prodded.

“It was just a little stuffy in your office! I’m fine I- I promise.” Ken swallowed nervously. Kazutoshi was far too close for comfort, fingers still holding onto his open collar. His eyes were fixed to the side on the stack of books he had taken off the shelf to reorganise, suddenly entranced by the titles on the spines and not the weight of Kazutoshi’s hands on his clothes.

“I- I’ll open up a window.” Kazutoshi noticed that Ken was embarrassed, he cleared his throat with a crackle as he let go of the maid collar. His cheeks flushing, what was he even thinking? Just going up to Ken and grabbing his collar out of nowhere? What the hell possessed him to do that?

“A-alright, thank you.” Ken left his collar open, but otherwise quickly turned and immersed himself in sorting books and dusting old shelves. Kazutoshi returned to his desk to fill out paperwork relating to the catering for the banquet.

--[Week four, Monday. Employee chambers]

When Ken woke that morning, it was to a letter on his nightstand on top of a newspaper clipping.

The letter was sealed with his sister’s unique wax seal shape, one she had commissioned herself for her work. But Ken had only sent his letter a few days ago? How did he get a response so quickly? He reached for the newspaper, delighted at the realisation that it was his sister’s most recent column.

He read quietly in his bed before getting dressed, smile plastered on his face. Did Kazutoshi do something? How did his letter both get to Mao as quickly as it did, but also return with her column which he had just been talking about the other day?

Kazutoshi was attentive in a caring way, as much as he would stubbornly deny that claim.

--[Kazutoshi’s bedroom]

Kazutoshi had an awful dream the night before. Following their encounter in his study, he couldn’t help but think back to it over the rest of the day. Mind full of questions like why the hell did I grab Ken’s clothes like that? or why am I awkward as fuck?

He had awoken covered in sweat, his sleepshirt clinging to his skin. His dreams filled with fluffy brown hair and the eyes of a deer caught in lamp light. Shy, crowded against the bookcase with bold hands. Lacey ridges of his apron softening his already delicate features. His dreams recreating the image of the way sweat dripped down Ken’s skin perfectly, as if he was seeing it again.

There was literally not a conceivable universe where Kazutoshi would ever act the way he did in his dream. But it was enjoyable, even if as nothing more than a fantasy.

--[Dining Hall]

“Oh, Kazutoshi, it’s good to see you.” Ken peaked around the stack of linens in his arms, seeing Kazutoshi reviewing some papers on a clipboard while contractors set up coloured ribbons and banners in the dining hall in droves of spring colours.

“Sup, we’re just setting up stuff for the banquet this Friday. Pretty much how it’s gonna go is the dinner will be in here, then we’re setting up a garden space outside for afterwards. Still haven’t heard back from the live musicians but they’ve done the last four years so I’m not worried.”

“I see, the décor is pretty nice. You must be really busy right? I feel like I haven’t seen you around as much even though it’s my job.”

“Yeah well, duty calls and all that. Plus my aunt has been having me take these stupid last minute dance lessons, as if I’m gonna fucking dance at the after party.” Kazutoshi scoffed.

“A dance? But I thought the afterparty was held outdoors? The grass hardly seems like a good place.”

“I know right? Either way it’s not super formal or anything, really the only people who do dance are old guys and their wives and sometimes Rui if any of her other friends came.”

“If you’re feeling up to it I’d love to watch what you’ve learned. It’d be fun! I think.” Ken smiled awkwardly.

“Oh yeah? You like dancing?” Kazutoshi raised an eyebrow.

“I like watching it but not doing it, I- I’ve got two left feet I really couldn’t- W-well, it wont matter much anyway, I guess. I’ll be busy with my work all night so make sure you… make heaps of connections? If that’s really all you plan on doing.”

“I mean, for the past few years that’s kinda all I’ve been doing, though they usually come to me first. I stand there, swirl whatever crap I’m drinking thoughtfully, nod my head to whatever they’re saying, have some firm handshake or whatever then nine times outta ten we never talk again.”

“Talking to that many people in one night must be pretty exhausting…”

“I’ll just steal you off your work and we can go hide somewhere until its over, if anyone asks I’ll just say I was having problems.” Kazutoshi snickered before turning back to the contractors, wandering off to go help with fixturing some of the banners. Ken took it as his cue to leave.

--[Week four, Tuesday. Kazutoshi’s room]

“You sure you don’t need any help putting it on?” Ken mumbled as he stared at the wall, very intently mapping out the shapes on the wallpaper with his eyes while his ears could hear the rustling of clothes.

“I told you I’m fine, and I don’t wanna spoil the reveal so I can get your honest opinion.” Kazutoshi fiddled with the buttons on his vest trying not to make any sounds that could indicate him having trouble if he didn’t want Ken to spring into action.

An attendant had gone to pick up his outfit for the banquet later that week, and Kazutoshi knew he needed to try everything on to make sure it fit properly. The coat was somewhat heavy, so he didn’t wear it on his arms for the sake of a bit more mobility, heaving down his shoulders instead.

“Alright, I think it’s all on. What do you think?” Kazutoshi smoothed his hands out on his waistcoat.

Ken turned to trace his eyes carefully over the ensemble. High white collar framed by a blue bowtie, silhouette cut by a sharp navy waistcoat buttoned up with silver, edges embroidered with a deeper midnight shade. Kazutoshi stood with his hands fixtured on his hips in relaxation, showing off the slight ruffle on the ends of his long white sleeves against his pants, also navy, and respectably wrinkle-free. His coat sat on his shoulders, broad and square almost military like, the outside matching the waistcoat’s colour, the inside a pure white lined with fleece.

“Well? Do I look dumb or not?” Kazutoshi deadpanned while Ken stalled for an answer.

“N-no of course not!” Ken blurted out before covering his mouth with his hands as if it betrayed him. “I don’t know much about clothing but… it looks nice.”

“Good enough. Taking this shit off because I’ll be pissed if I get it dirty before Friday.”

Ken turned away again as Kazutoshi redressed himself.

“God, not really looking forward to the banquet to be honest. Make sure to give me an out if I’m ready to leave. I’d honestly rather just spend the night with you in the library.” Kazutoshi sighed.

“Y-yeah?” Ken squeaked.

“Well, you aren’t a total freak or anything, and you’re not weird about my interests or whatever. I dunno, talking with you makes me feel normal. Feels like people are either walking on eggshells around me or revering me just because I own a crap load of sheep or whatever.”

“If you need an out from talking to ‘freaks’ at the banquet, give me a signal and I’ll pretend like you’re about to pass out. I tidied up the reading nook in the library so we can hide away there together.” Ken joked lightly.

“Honestly that sounds awesome. Alright, got my clothes on, you can turn around now.” Kazutoshi stretched comfortably, now back in his usual dress shirt and trousers. “How’s the employee prep been going?”

“It’s pretty boring but at least it’s simple. Really it’s just familiarising ourselves with the courses and the attendees with dietary requirements. Then the afterparty is just supervising mostly.”

“In the best case scenario you’ll be standing there for god knows how long, worst case scenario you’re escorting super drunk guys out.”

“Respectfully in regards to my position, there are more desirable jobs out there.”

--[Week four, Wednesday. Hallway outside Kazutoshi’s bedroom]

Ken wiped the sweat from his brow, looking down at the shiny hall floors. He was slowly making his way throughout the manor as he prepared the site for guests in a few days. Scrubbing the skirting of the wall corners, shining the windows, conditioning the carpets, polishing silverware and plates. Admittedly his skills were still average even after almost a month, but what mattered is the job got done.

The floors sparkled in the sun after being mopped, bringing out a rich shine of the hardwood planks that lined most of the floors. Once the floors were properly dry, he’d be able to roll the long carpets back out.

The door of Kazutoshi’s bedroom creaked open, admittedly Ken completely forgotten he was napping.

“W-wait, Kazutoshi the floor is still wet!” Ken stepped out onto the wet flooring in his socks. His shoes long since discarded so he could traverse the damp floors without tracking dirt back through it. His feet struggled to maintain a good grip on the floor, slightly slipping as he reached for purchase on the wall.

“F-fuck!” Kazutoshi stepped out of his bedroom door, losing his balance as he stumbled repeatedly to try steady himself. Ken left the wall as he reached out to try and grab hold of Kazutoshi’s hands to keep him from falling over.

Ken stretched his arm slightly to help Kazutoshi get stable, a frantic hand grabbed his own which caused him to also stumble. Suddenly gripping at his clothes as he shuffled on the wet floor, clinging close like a baby koala. After a few seconds of hurried moving, the two were still.

“God damn that scared the shit out of me.” Kazutoshi breathed a relieved sigh as he rested his head on Ken’s chest, a little physically overwhelmed. His hands still fisted in his apron.

“I completely forgot you were having a nap in your bedroom I-“

“Don’t even apologise, shut up, I can feel your radiant apologetic aura and I’m telling you no.”

“Okay but if I remembered you were sleeping this wouldn’t have happened.”

“Okay well I’m telling you it didn’t because you were there to kinda catch me because we got lucky and I didn’t end up pulling you down with me.”

“If we did end up falling I’d make sure I cushioned your landing.”

“The least you can do after setting up a slippery trap outside my bedroom.”

Ken laughed slightly, the sound like a melodious chime in Kazutoshi’s ears. He loosened his grip in Ken’s apron as he thought. He wasn’t certain when his perception of Ken seemed to change, even after they’d crossed the bridge of Kazutoshi dealing with his insecurity of being cared for, it never felt right to just see Ken as a tool to be ordered around. He was present, and attentive, and sweet, and kind and all sorts of other endearing things.

He remembered a time when him and Ken had read parallel together in the library, both reading different books, Ken having picked something random off the shelf that seemed interesting. But Kazutoshi couldn’t draw his eyes away from the nervous and flushed look on his face as he raised the book to cover his flustered look. Telling him after that the main characters were simply forced to share a bed, but it was clearly enough to have him averting his eyes to the table.

Or around a week ago, Kazutoshi had just lazed in the night hours on a lounge in the sunroom soaking up the moon rays. He was just resting his eyes, nowhere near asleep, but clearly still enough for Ken to think he was. Having carried him back to his room bundled up in his arms, tucking him in gently, but not daring to attempt to change him into his pyjamas. Kazutoshi had tried so hard to pretend he was sleeping, to enjoy the firm feeling of Ken’s hands cradling his back and under his knees.

But Kazutoshi wouldn’t dare say anything in a moment like this. If one day he found the courage, it wouldn’t be when Ken is in his work uniform. Kazutoshi wanted something free, so his lips stayed sealed.

--[Week four, Thursday. Bathroom]

Ken hummed while he raked his fingers through Kazutoshi’s hair, kneeling behind the bath basin in the floor. The angle was a little awkward with how tall he was, but he managed. Lathering the suds in Kazutoshi’s hair soothingly.

“Is there a reason why you’re doing this for me?” Kazutoshi complained, pretending as if he wasn’t enjoying the feelings of Ken’s fingers massaging his scalp.

“I- I just want to make sure you’re in the best shape possible for tomorrow! And besides, you can relax better like this if I do the work.” Ken continued his ministrations, the entire bottom half of his skirt wet, it stuck to his skin in a way that made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up, but he was willing to make that sacrifice.

“F-fine, yeah, whatever.” Kazutoshi sunk a little lower, some of his wet hair slipping out of Ken’s hands. Admittedly, he’d become comfortable with the way Ken doted on him.

Ken revelled in the feeling of the warm water on his hands as he steeped Kazutoshi’s hair. Job aside, becoming close with him over the past few weeks made him feel like he wanted to care for Kazutoshi just out of his own will. No duty or anything, just wanting to see him happy and healthy.

When it came to anxiety, Ken had a lot of it. He worried himself half to death on his way to the manor for the first time, he trembled in his bed after the first day fearful for what tomorrow would bring, his nerves convinced him his employer hated him. But as the layers of Kazutoshi peel back, he understood, he saw his kindness, his assurance, the small ways his joy seeped through those trained stern expressions, his stubborn nature that concealed his true desires.

And the way he grounded Ken made his heart soar, like no matter how hard Ken tried to mask upset or discomfort, Kazutoshi saw right through him. Stripping away his walls until nothing but the truth remained. And when you had a lonely upbringing, just that acknowledgement was enough. But Kazutoshi never ceased to amaze him, to remind him that he was a person too, not just a tool to order around. He always thought back to their outing together, how Kazutoshi just wanted to be normal with Ken, to see and feel the world with him at his side.

But that was a fleeting thought, Ken figured he should be happy enough just to be at Kazutoshi’s side, he squashed the thought, and resumed his gentle bathing.

--[Week four, Friday. Kazutoshi’s bedroom]

“Alright, looks good, I should probably get to the foyer, my aunt’s probably waiting there to greet the guests as they arrive. And you’ve gotta go get changed too.” Kazutoshi secured his coat over his shoulders, smoothing out his waistcoat with his palms.

“Ah, right. I probably won’t see you until the dinner then?”

“I could probably make a late entrance to the dinner if you wanna talk beforehand just as emotional preparation.” Kazutoshi nudged Ken expectantly.

“W-we have a debrief about the serving so I won’t really have time… we can talk after the service so… at the afterparty?” Ken posed, too awkward to directly ask to meetup himself, prompting Kazutoshi to do so instead.

“Yeah, sounds good. Though you talk like you aren’t serving me specifically all my food.”

“It wouldn’t be polite to talk about personal things while everyone is eating! Besides, I’m not- supposed to.”

“Whatever.” Kazutoshi annoyingly dragged out. “I’ll see you at dinner.”

“See you later Kazutoshi.” Ken bowed before hurrying off to go get changed.

--[Dining hall]

After everyone was seated, Kazutoshi entered the room. It was just like the dinner rehearsal, he’d be fine. He strode across the room to his seat at the head of the table, Ken standing beside his seat, large, adorned with carvings in the wood. Ken took his coat and hung it over the back of the chair. Kazutoshi cleared his throat.

“Thanks all for coming to attend tonight’s banquet.” Kazutoshi could hear Ruiko trying not to snicker at the table. His incredibly forced faux-polite voice was so unlike him, reciting off a practiced speech his aunt had written for him to say. “We give thanks to all toiling hands that have allowed for us to convene to celebrate bountiful settlements and thriving communities.”

Ken stared at the ceiling, feeling his lip twitching. It admittedly was a little funny. His hands folded tightly over his lap while Kazutoshi recited empty platitudes to people he wouldn’t see in another year. He hurried away to the kitchen once the service commenced, steadying his breathing. The sleeves of his shirt were also a little itchy, but in that moment it wasn't too bad.

He approached Kazutoshi briskly with the first course, leaning down to quietly whisper.

“What was that?”

“Some crap my aunt wrote for me. In her defense, I dunno if I’d trust me to write the speech either.”

“It was- definitely unlike you.”

“Thanks.” Kazutoshi deadpanned. “But I don’t think a bunch of old fogies care.”

“Yeah, true.”

“Okay now regale me on what you’re serving, this is what you practiced right?”

“R-right! The first course is a Southern inspired rice cake hot pot, the broth has been…”

Kazutoshi phased out what Ken was saying, he trusted him to serve him only things that were safe to eat. But his eyes always had this lovely twinkle in them whenever he got absorbed in overexplaining things.

Kazutoshi wasn’t a stranger to pretending to be interested in what someone was saying, he was pretty sure Ken knew he did it sometimes anyway. But he was always focused, because the glowing look on Ken’s face was always enough to occupy his attention.

“…Did you catch all that?” Ken prompted, clearly aware that Kazutoshi may not have actually been listening, though he wasn’t bothered by it.

“I caught the part where you said I won’t die if I eat this.” Kazutoshi shrugged.

“Guess that’s the most important part.” Ken shrugged in return, placing the bowl down carefully.

“Thanks, see you soon I guess.”

Before Kazutoshi reached for his utensils, he surveyed the people sitting near him. They’d be his company of small talk for the whole dinner so he may as well be acquainted with all of them.

“Good evening. It’s good to see you again.” A cold voice made the hairs on the back of Kazutoshi’s neck stand up. Sat right at his left side was-

“Okazaki.”

“It’s been a while.” He couldn’t see her face, but he could hear the grin in her voice.

This was going to be a long dinner.

“Guess so, haven’t seen you in like, a year.” Kazutoshi didn’t need false pretences with Hanano, frankly she didn’t want them either. A representative from an artisanal charter who specialised in woodwork. And somehow, she always found the right way to get under Kazutoshi’s skin. The hollow empty eyes of her usual fox mask didn’t help.

“You seem to be doing well.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Am I not allowed to comment on you being well? I thought it was a compliment.”

“You usually don’t say that kind of stuff without an ulterior motive.”

“I can assure I was simply being polite.”

“As you can see I’m fine.”

“’Fine’ must be a subjective measure.”

Kazutoshi groaned, she always had weird shit to say. Surely whoever put together the seating arrangement must have done this on purpose.

“Well it’s not your problem since to me I’m doing fine.”

“If that’s how you think I suppose.” Hanano turned back to her food, staring at it, clearly not keen on eating in a public space where many would see the bottom half of her face uncovered.

Kazutoshi turned away quickly to whatever stranger was sat at his right instead.

--[After the dinner, in the garden]

Admittedly Kazutoshi was a little upset, the dessert had looked so sweet and wonderful but god forbid it be a primarily milk-based jelly. Kazutoshi had only had cows milk a few times, and he would always be certain that it was superior to alternative milk. Obviously he had received a special modified version for himself but the cows milk version just looked so much better. But a sweet milky dessert was not worth the absolute terror that would come later-

“Ah- there you are.” Ken shyly scampered next to Kazutoshi’s side. The two lingering near the main door back into the manor.

The garden was alive with lamp light and music, the fireflies danced in the evening breeze and the cheer of tipsy guests and giggling filled the air. There were too many guests for Ken to reasonably keep a watch over on his own, so he singled out a few he thought might become tipsy problems later. Maybe having bottomless alcohol being served constantly was a mistake, one person would walk by with a tray and the entire contents would be gone within minutes.

“Oh, hey. Having fun?”

“As fun as you can have while wearing a long sleeve shirt with some of the most uncomfortable material.” Ken fidgeted with the edge of his sleeve, the uniform was a pretty basic white shirt with matching black waistcoat and pants but Ken was not having it at all. The material scratched at his skin in a hellish way.

“If it bothers you, you can… go change. There’s plenty of other employees who are identified by uniform and I’m sure we can all afford for you to be absent for a few minutes.” Kazutoshi pushed, admittedly, he had an ulterior motive.

“O-oh… no, I’ll be okay. I won’t shirk my duties I- yeah. That and I’d hate to be the only one not wearing the special event uniform, I wouldn’t want to stand out too much.” Ken sighed, clearly grappling with his growing discomfort, but his reason winning out over the wailing and thrashing trying to tear its way out of his soul.

“That’s cool.” Kazutoshi crossed his arms over his chest, thinking. He’d have to engage another plan instead, if convincing him wouldn’t be enough.

He spotted Ruiko bumbling around with a few of her friends who’d come along with her. Quickly crossing the garden, leaving Ken alone. He didn’t pay his absence any mind, Kazutoshi was busy after all, he’d surely have a lot of people to talk to.

When Kazutoshi approached, that enough let Ruiko know of the situation.

He nonchalantly moseyed around the party, vague platitudes here and there as he passed through crowds and pillars of shaped hedge. He saw through the cracks of the crowd Ruiko as she delicately and politely grabbed a glass of red wine. Unassuming, with the atmosphere.

His original plan was just to try convince Ken to go change, the wine plan was a back up. But considering Ken was already having some sensory issues with the uniform, it sped the process up slightly – even if Kazutoshi felt bad for him having been forced to wear it. He’d have a chat to whoever processed the uniform orders later.

Ruiko swallowed thickly, whatever embarrassment that may surmount she’d live with she supposed. She closed the gap over the grass to where Ken was leaning ever so slightly against the wall near the doors.

Ken’s hands twitched, his fallen look barely disguising the soul-rending discomfort he was feeling. That speck of discomfort in such short time had bubbled over into a rage that made him feel like he could burst and snap at anyone who looked at him wrong. There had not been a time where he had hated his job before, but this was that time, it felt like he’d kill to not be here. He kind of regretted turning down Kazutoshi’s offer to go change.

Swaying nonchalantly in Ken’s direction, Ruiko made it seem as if part of her heeled shoe got stuck in a small pile of dirt, flicking her glass forwards onto the white of Ken’s sleeve.

“Oh shit- uh, I’m so sorry Hasegawa. Let me help you get cleaned up-“ Ruiko paused when she realised Ken wasn’t looking at her, knuckles white with hands clasped together over his lap. “Let’s get you inside…” Ruiko hovered her hands over Ken’s back, slipping the two of them back into the manor.

--[Employee chambers]

Ken practically tore the top half of the uniform off himself, slumping down on his bed, barely paying any mind to the box sat right next to him. He was pretty sure some parts of his clothes had actually torn in his effort to rid himself of that feeling, but he did not care. He was freed, his skin could breathe, and that’s what mattered.

“Are you…?” okay?

“No-! I’m just- tired. The clothes were really itchy I just… could not take another second out there.” Ken wiped at his bare skin, thankful to be free. Ruiko did not particularly care that he was topless.

“Let’s get you into something else.” Ruiko nonchalantly reached for the box on his bed, passing it into his lap.

“You did that on purpose right?” Ken looked up at Ruiko, his eyes dark with fatigue, but at the same time, no malice was found in his gaze. If anything he was almost thankful for what she had done.

“We already made it here so yeah, busted, it was Kamimura’s idea.”

“He knew I wanted to change that badly that he’d get you to pour wine on me?”

“Well… it’s not the original reason but it happened to work out that way. Open the box, he wanted you to wear it.”

Ken sighed, lifting the lid on the box. A short card on top of some bundles of paper.

If you’re going to wear something I made, wear it with some confidence I’m begging you.

Hiroaki Nakamigawa

He raised an eyebrow, delicately removing the paper bundles. Revealing glittering shades of white and blue, he slipped his fingers under the soft bodice, feeling the intricate weave of the fabric used on at least the front panel. He slowly lifted more out of the box, revealing fine shape and expensive materials.

“I-I can’t wear this! Are you kidding me?!” Ken squeaked, shoving the outfit back into the box.

“What?! Says who?!” Ruiko barked back.

“I’m-“ Ken swallowed, he didn’t really have an answer to that.

“Kamimura wants you to wear it and last time I checked it’s his party.” Ruiko added, watching Ken about to reach for a rebuttal. “I think he’d be happy if you wore it.”

“I guess, yeah. I just, what if-“

“’What if’ nothing now take off your pants.”

“E-excuse me?!”

“We don’t have forever hurry up and get dressed!”

--[In the garden]

“Did you have fun on your recon mission?” Watari chirped over her glass of sparkling water, waiting for Ruiko at a white metal table. The legs of both the table and the chairs slightly rusted where they met the ground, but the metal pipework intricate.

“Eh it was alright, I’ll cash in my favour for my efforts later. Anyway, this party kinda blows anyway I was thinking I might just hitch a ride out soon.” Ruiko sat down in her seat next to Watari. Hanano seated at the table as well, but she sat quietly.

“Honestly I look forward to it every year thinking it’s gonna be super fun then it’s not and I remember it’s just a glorified business meeting. As if I don’t know everyone here anyway, connections are kinda pointless when you’re already established.” Watari traced her finger along the rim of her glass in boredom.

“Yeah I feel like after you’ve gone once you’ve kinda seen it all. I’m down for free food though.” Ruiko rested a chin on her palm.

“I find the repeat interactions quite entertaining actually.” Hanano chimed in, still and gentle, face unreadable behind her mask.

“That’s just because you like making people uncomfortable.” Ruiko pursed her lips.

“I tend to spend a lot of time in my workshop carving, these events are good for stimulating interactions between myself and others.”

“You didn’t deny what she said though.” Watari shrugged.

“Hmm, I suppose I didn’t.”

“Hey guys.” Mai pulled up the extra empty seat at the table.

“Hayashi!” Ruiko perked up quickly, going in for a hug, squishing against Mai’s suit.

“Hayashi~! So glad you made it we needed something to spice this place up.” Watari got up out of her seat to also go in for a hug.

“Yeah yeah- just had to finish up a few things but I’m off the clock so it’s all good now. Nothing interesting happened?” Mai slung an arm over the backrest of the chair, surveying the other three at the table.

“Eh, not much different from last year to be honest. Few new faces but nothing too crazy.” Watari waved off as she did another once over survey of the garden space.

“So like usual then. I’m cool as long as nobody is losing their shit, boring is better than insane.” Mai nonchalantly commented, pleased.

“Eh, true. Anything fun down on the employee side?” Ruiko inquired.

“Not much on our end either, I did have to break up a tiny fight on the way but it was just some petty crap and they were both wasted anyway. Passed out right on the grass near the work side door.”

Kazutoshi sighed, he had been listening in on their conversation since it was far more riveting than any of the repeat drivel he had to keep hearing. He imagined small talk was more enjoyable for people who were able to get drunk, Kazutoshi was unfortunately not one of those people.

He was somewhat cornered among a small group of older people inquiring with each other about new road taxes enforced on certain north-bound trade routes which Kazutoshi was fine to chime in on when necessary, and block out when not.

He leaned his head to the side when he heard his friend’s table start murmuring slightly, he could make out the sound of Ruiko trying to shush them for whatever reason.

It was Ken, returning alone despite how he left with Ruiko. Ken’s concerns were assuaged when he didn’t draw much attention to himself, to most just seeming like another party goer, inconspicuous, despite his shining colours, he blended in with the crowd. Palms folded gently over his lap, no strong hem for him to white knuckle his fingers on.

While cotton lace covered his collarbone all the way down to his wrists, framing a slim light blue bodice, soft fabric clutching the edges of Ken’s toned torso, navy pants framed by the bodice which fell into a train of glittering blue silk, trailing off into peacock feathers. The cuts were round, the shape slim, showing off both the hardened and softened edges of Ken’s figure.

Kazutoshi if anything was glad not many people paid him too much attention, both in the fact that Ken definitely felt more comfortable that way, but also with churning possessiveness that bubbled in his stomach.

Ken was about to go over to where his other friends sat at the table after getting waved over by Ruiko, but Kazutoshi stepped in to intercept.

“…Ken.”

“Kazutoshi.” Ken said in that meek voice of his, gaze downcast, cheeks ruddy.

Their ears were full with the background chatter of partygoers around them.

“You look… nice.” Kazutoshi turned his face to hide in the collar of his coat.

“-Ah. Th- Thank you.” Ken’s folded palms sweated. His fingertips burning, feeling like they were going to explode.

“Let’s go somewhere else. Can barely hear you standing in this shitstorm.” Kazutoshi turned, Ken following behind him at a careful measured pace. Making sure the delicate peacock feathers on the ends of his clothes weren’t catching on the ground.

The Kamimura estate was large enough to have sweeping sheets of green around the building, cut off by the edge of some lightly forested area. They retreated to a short clearing a little further away, still close by to the festivities, enough that the nascent light kept them illuminated, but far enough away not to be heard by passers.

Every garden on the estate was manicured and upkept, the small clearing they escaped to surrounded by trees with draping branches. A gentle circle of grass surrounded by a ring of wildflowers. No lights of its own to ward off wandering attendees, but still light enough that they could comfortably see each other accompanied by the glow of the moon that burned through the falling leaves. The gazebo Kazutoshi sometimes spent his afternoons was somewhat of a barrier from the party spreading any further.

“Thank god we’re outta there, it’s way quieter over here.” Kazutoshi cleared his throat.

“Y-yeah, it was getting a little overwhelming.” Ken kept his eyes trained to the ground, words he wanted to say caught in his throat. “S-so, I was told you’re… the one who uhm, you know. Got my clothes.” Ken flushed, fiddling with his sweaty fingers.

“Yeah, uhm, yeah. The sketch looked pretty good so, yeah, I figured it would be a waste to not see you in it.” Kazutoshi tried to play off. “You look good in blue.”

“You think so? It’s never really been a colour I thought suited me.”

“Well I mean, I trusted the professional to pick the colour and turns out he was onto something. That and like, it’s refreshing to not see you in your uniform.”

“It’s not like I get many opportunities to not wear my uniform.”

“Eh, true.”

The two stood awkwardly in silence for a few seconds, avoiding each other’s gazes. They could still hear bustling chatter and the lively sound of classical music.

“K-Kazutoshi. I want to ask something, and I want you to give me an honest answer.” Ken swallowed his nerves, hands twitching, barely able to look Kazutoshi in the eye.

“Yeah? Sure, go ahead.” As calm as Kazutoshi tried to seem, his heart hammered in his chest. Anxious, petrified even, for whatever Ken might say.

“Sorry if this is… weird to ask but- why do I get preferential treatment among all the other employees?” Ken looked at Kazutoshi with shaky and nervous eyes.

“Well I mean I guess, yeah, but it's nothing too crazy.”

“I just-! I say I want to read my sister’s column, and then it’s on my bedside table a few days later. We sit and read together on your bed! You’re comfortable enough to let me care for you when you’re vulnerable- A-and this!” Ken gestured to his clothes. “I don’t see you doing this sort of thing for anyone else.”

“Unlike everyone else, you’re like, my designated duo. Everyone else is generalised to the state, but you are pretty much attached to me just based on your position. So, y’know- our relationship is just different.” Kazutoshi tried to play off, his voice cracking.

“Different how?” Ken huffed.

“I just told you! I pretty much spelled it out, we’re close, there you go. So what, you don’t like that I think we’re friends?” Kazutoshi spat in annoyance.

“I do like that we’re friends, I really appreciate your company! I just… sorry- no, I, no it’s okay. Yeah, thank you, I’m glad you think like that of me.” Ken nodded softly, smiling gently, eyes still concealing something more.

“Why are you being weird?”

Ken breathed deeply, steeling his nerves.

“You do all these things for me, then suddenly you bring me away from the crowd, so we can speak in private, I think… I may have expected something different from this interaction.” Ken trailed off, the last part barely audible as his voice tapered off into a whisper.

“…Ken?” Kazutoshi prodded, not hearing the last part of what Ken had said.

“…Yeah?”

“You know, if you have something on your mind, you can just say it. I’m not gonna kill you for being honest, I think we’re kinda past that point.” Kazutoshi prompted. Anxiety burned a hole in his heart, he wouldn’t say it, he wanted Ken to say it.

“I… but-“

“But nothing actually, c’mon, out with it.” Kazutoshi continued to press, hoping that whatever Ken was hiding beneath the surface, was what he was looking for.

“I think you forget I’m… just a maid.” Ken added, his tone dropping in a self-depreciative way.

“This conversation feels kinda familiar, Ken I really don’t care if you’re a maid, it’s not gonna change that we’re close.”

“T-that’s not the point! Kazutoshi, I don’t want to be friends.” Ken lowered his head, eyes stinging with frustrated tears.

“Uhm, the fuck? The fuck is that supposed to mean-“

Ken reached down to grip one of Kazutoshi’s hands.

“I’m just a maid, so then- why do I feel these things for you? I can’t I- I was never meant for anything more that work, we were never supposed to be like this. But you…” Ken raised Kazutoshi’s hand to lean his forehead on the top of his fingers.

“…Ken?” Kazutoshi paced the way he talked. His hearted jumping into his throat, choking any words that might threaten to spill out with no warning.

“Kazutoshi. I’m so sorry I- I should never have… I’m not- I can’t- we can’t-“ Ken tried to steady his breathing. “I can’t be here anymore.”

“What? Ken for god’s sake what the hell are you on about?”

“I think-! T-that I’ve fallen for you! I-in a romantic way.” Ken’s grip on Kazutoshi’s hand became like iron, knuckles tense as immediate regret washed over his nerves from head to toe.

“Ken I…”

“I just- I don’t think it would be right for me to stay. I really don’t want- I mean- in your best interest I just don’t think its right for me to stay in my job. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything.”

“Ken.”

“S-so I don’t want to intrude on your life if it’s going to be a problem. I appreciate all you’ve done for me and you’ve been a… really good friend to me, but I think it’s better for the both of us if I-“

“Ken.” Kazutoshi planted his hands on Ken’s cheeks, startling him with a sting.

“Y-yes?!” Ken yelped.

“Shut up.” Kazutoshi stood up on the tips of his toes, barely tall enough to push their lips together. Tracing his thumb back and forth over Ken’s cheek, his fingertips were somewhat frigid, but Ken didn’t particularly care.

Kazutoshi pulled back, burning the image of Ken’s flushed surprise into his brain.

“K-Kazutoshi?” Ken swallowed nervously.

“I guess this makes things a bit easier.”

“Huh?”

“A month ago. Back when I despised the idea of having a maid. My aunt convinced me to give you a month’s worth of time, and once that month was over, we’d decide whether or not I wanted you to stay.” Kazutoshi averted his eyes to the ground to avoid looking at Ken’s eyes during his own embarrassment.

“Y-Yeah? Have you decided?”

“I don’t want a maid, I want you.”

The air was quiet for a moment while Ken processed.

“S-say something dammit, do you know how embarrassing that was!?” Kazutoshi yelped.

“S-sorry! I’m thinking about how to respond. My hourly rate was kind of nice, maybe I prefer being a maid…” Ken pondered jokingly, knowing it would get a rise out of Kazutoshi.

“Well fuck, if you dream of labour be my guest but if it was up to me, I’d be burning your uniform.” Kazutoshi joked.

“You know I couldn’t, I actually kind of like it.”

They both stood in an awkward silence.

“So… what now?” Kazutoshi brushed his foot on the grass absentmindedly. His heart was hammering a little too fast, he stepped back, needing to calm down.

[The next day; a new day]

“Pack light, I’m expecting you to be back soon.” Kazutoshi lingered behind Ken as he packed his belongings into his suitcase, dressed politely for the journey home.

“I told the chauffer possibly a week’s time, there’s a few things I’d like to get done back home first. A-and I’d like to make sure my family is up to date on what’s going on. My mom always worries about me, so she’ll want to know what happened. She might have a mini heart attack when she hears I’m not employed anymore.”

“Gonna tell them you get to leech of my family fortune now?” Kazutoshi teased.

“Y-you’re the one who made the arrangement! We don’t have to if you’re not comfortable with it, I came here in the first place for employment it doesn’t bother me.” Ken fiddled with his hands awkwardly.

“I’m just kidding. I mean I’m technically the one who fired you anyway so consider it an unemployment benefit. I’m being selfish enough already.”

“You say that like I don’t love it here too. You’re acting like you’re forcing me to stay locked up in some prison. I… I’m looking forward to what the future might be for us. Even though Mao might scold me for making a hasty decision, but I don’t regret it.

Ken latched his case up, brushing off his clothes. Kazutoshi walked with him to the front of the estate, down the steps where the chauffer waited to take Ken on the long journey home.

“Write if anything happens or you… change your mind. You don’t have to stay, just making sure you know that.” Kazutoshi skittishly looked away from Ken.

“Honestly, after the last month, I don’t think can imagine a place where I feel as happy as I do now. So, I’ll be back soon.” Ken leaned forward to press a gentle kiss onto Kazutoshi’s forehead.

“I’ll be waiting.”

Kazutoshi waved Ken off as he entered the carriage. It felt bittersweet, being separated from Ken for the first time in a month. But he’d be patient, and when he returned, Ken would be all his.