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Next Time Naked

Summary:

"When I said next time naked, I didn’t expect Marc would actually do it."

Notes:

This is the fastest I have ever turned a crackfic around. Sometimes jokes really do write themselves!!

1. "Next time naked" (Marco Bezzecchi, Misano 2025 post-race press conference) // 2. Marc Márquez's Instagram post of himself shirtless in bed cuddling the MotoGP trophy (September 30) // 3. Valentino Rossi really was also in Indonesia on September 30 for a VR46 (team) event // 4. Pecco now follows Marc on Instagram (and vice versa)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Bez stared at his phone, impressed.

"You know, when I said next time naked, I didn’t expect Marc would actually do it." 

Bez didn’t follow Marc on Instagram, but Pecco did. He'd sent his teammate's post to the VR46 Minus 46 groupchat with an accompanying 😫.

"You’ve seen Marc shirtless before," said Luca in exasperation. "Now put your tongue back in your mouth before Vale sees."

"Before I see what?" 

Speak of the devil. Valentino had gotten back to the hotel from the VR46 team event early. Faced with his expectant stare, Bez had no choice but to hand his phone over.

He and Luca watched as Valentino's face went through the phases of a fight-or-flight response before settling on a different F entirely. Marc might not be Helen who launched a thousand ships, but the photo was clearly enough to send Valentino's wits out to sea.

"Is he staring at Marc or at the trophy?" said Bez, in increasing horror. "And does he have to do it on my phone? … WHY IS HE ZOOMING IN ON THE PICTURE?"

Bez could only hope Valentino was looking for his own name on the trophy and not checking if Marc was wearing underwear. 

Notes:

Bez just wants his phone back...

Luca's other lines got cut for wordcount reasons, but he's sitting there thinking that even if Honda were paying him the same €20 million salary that Marc walked away from, it still wouldn't be enough to deal with this.

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