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If you ask Daeyoung what his favourite time of the day is, his answer is undoubtedly bedtime. Aside from the fact that the man is a heavy sleeper and his mattress feels too comfy to get off, bedtime means sleeping with Riku. So yeah, the final answer to Daeyoung’s favourite time and thing to do is going to bed with his boyfriend. Nothing funny or busy business, although if there is, Daeyoung will be more than happy to comply. It is all about sharing the same queen-sized bed, lending your arm as the pillow for your lover, cuddling and planting kisses till sleep takes over your mind, and drifting off in each other’s embrace. Even if Daeyoung is too shy to admit, bedtime is always in his top two best-loved moments of the day, and it is never at the second place.
However, his night routine has not been as enjoyable lately. Don’t get him wrong, Riku is forever his one and most adored bed mate. Daeyoung can never grow tired of seeing his partner’s endearing pout in the middle of the night or being woken up by Riku’s angelic voice and pecks. As a matter of fact, each day spent together nurtures their love and helps Daeyoung realise how fortunate and blessed he has been to have Riku in his life.
But somehow, his minor distress has happened and been affecting his most important, romantic quality time with Riku adversely. And it is all Daeyoung’s own fault.
🐿️
Riku’s birthday was coming. As the best boyfriend in the world, Daeyoung had prepared every present with extreme love and care as always. He had made an affectionate music playlist for the upcoming event, looked up recipes for Riku’s most favourite dishes and chosen the freshest ingredient in the local market. The earrings had already been bought a whole month earlier and were now in a small bow tied box, well-hidden on their bookshelf. Everything seemed ready for the big day, and Daeyoung couldn’t wait till Saturday to cook the most appetising meal for his Riku in the kitchen. Just two more days for him to double the love his hyung had given him on his own birthday last weekend.
Later that night, after filling their stomachs with another nutritious and tasty dinner, Daeyoung was idly browsing the internet while waiting for Riku to finish his shower. That was when Daeyoung saw it – the perfect plushie that resembled his feline-like boyfriend. It was a black cat doll at a very much huggable size. On the top of the doll’s head was a chestnut-shaped hat. The cat was decorated with a pink heart and a green star on either ear, together with pink paw-shaped embroideries sewn on its hands, feet and chest. Its mischievous eyes reminded Daeyoung of his hyung’s naughty face whenever Riku asked for something, and the older always got what he wanted since Daeyoung never learned how to say no. This stuffed kitty seemed like an excellent replica of Riku. Daeyoung wasted no time to click on the website and realised the teddy bear shop was only a one-hour drive from his office. Daeyoung furrowed his eyebrows, reciting the well-planned activities and presents he had prepared in advance. But how could Daeyoung deny Riku from everything he deserved. “One more present for my love.” Daeyoung thought to himself, “I’ll get this tomorrow after work.”
Exactly the moment after Daeyoung received a confirmation from the teddy bear store, Riku stepped out of their bathroom and joined him on bed.
“Wanna sleep now, jagi?” The Japanese beauty pouted and straddled him on bed.
“Right away, my princess.” Daeyoung put his phone face down on the nightstand, turned off the bedside lamps and cuddled the older under the warm blanket.
------
To say Riku enjoyed his birthday celebration was an understatement. Who knew Daeyoung could be a three-star chef and made him the best hometown dishes somewhere far from Fukui like this? Of course, Riku was fully aware and not once hesitant to compliment the younger for his talent. Yet what made the young Japanese beam with joy had to be the stack of wrapped presents waiting for him on the bed.
“I hope you will enjoy all of them.” Daeyoung scratched the back of his head, looking away all flustered.
Tears gathered in Riku’s eyes. He couldn’t believe the many presents Daeyoung prepared for him, and most importantly, how devoted and caring his boyfriend was. It was, after all, no surprise that Daeyoung loved to spoil him.
Upon Daeyoung’s encouragement, Riku opened each of the beautifully wrapped boxes, and jumped in excitement at his new notebook, sunglasses, and- oh gosh, the dazzling earrings he had been saving to purchase. Riku was so confident he stayed subtle about them, yet Daeyoung had somehow found out and decided to pamper him instead. In an instant, his arms wrapped around Daeyoung’s neck.
“Ahhh, this is not fair! You keep melting my heart every day!! How did you know I’ve been dying for these?”
Daeyoung let out a soft chuckle, patting the other’s head. “Guess I’m getting better at reading your mind.”
The answer did not help with calming Riku’s heart and instead made him tighten his hold around Daeyoung. The younger brushed his lips against the top of Riku’s head, lightly swaying their body to the music played by the speaker. When Riku finally calmed down, Daeyoung urged him to open the final present.
A stuffed animal had absolutely not been on his wish list since high school. Regardless, for some unknown reasons, the sight of the black plush kitty in front of him made Riku struggle to fight back the tears he tried to swallow earlier. This present was so silly. A cutesy feline doll whose head was bigger than his? So endearingly silly. Riku tightened his fists around the plushies, shoulders drawn up higher and breaths hitched. He did not utter a single word, vision focused solely on the toy, and the sight scared Daeyoung too much for his liking.
“D-do you not li– Is this too dumb? I’m sorry hyung, I-I just thought it resembles yo– No no, it’s just a dumb idea. I can return this!” Daeyoung stumbled over his own words, panic and anxiety clouding his mind as unshed tears finally ran down Riku’s small face.
What have you done, Daeyoung? Everything has been perfect and now you’re ruining it! Daeyoung reprimanded himself mentally and tried to soothe Riku. Nonetheless, rather than answering his questions, Riku looked at him with his red, watery eyes.
“Y-you think this cat looks like me?” Riku asked with a high-pitched, emotional voice. His flushed nose and occasional hiccups felt like a knife against Daeyoung’s chest.
“Yes, I do. But it’s just a stupid idea and I can ask for a refu-”
“No!” Riku’s cry interrupted him, the plushie now being squeezed in his arms. “This is the best present ever!”
Relief ran across Daeyoung’s body, the breath he didn’t know he had been holding finally left his lungs. This stuffed kitten had really resulted in a rollercoaster of emotions and threatened to stab Daeyoung’s heart. The man wiped Riku’s tears away with his thumbs and asked him with a much calmer, affectionate voice.
“You like it?”
Riku’s head shook violently. “No, I love it!” He kept sniffling, tears still running down on the gorgeous face, which was now decorated with a bright smile.
The reassurance eased their hearts. The speaker changed to a slow Japanese R&B song, and Daeyoung’s embrace never once left Riku’s frame. Riku’s sobs slowed down, tears no longer threatened to pour out of his round eyes, and he finally met Daeyoung’s tender gaze.
“Thank you, Daeyoungie.” He spoke up quietly. “This is the best birthday ever.”
The soft-spoken words made Daeyoung’s heart skip a beat with happiness. With the fluctuating emotions he had been through tonight, Daeyoung made a mental note to visit a cardiology clinic for his heart arrhythmias.
Their lips met in a slow, feather-like kiss at first, matching the rhythm of the song being played. And soon after, heat rose up their body, mouths crashing each other with an unspoken starvation. Daeyoung’s hands squeezed lightly around Riku’s waist and occasionally brushed the spot at Riku’s back that made him squirm. The moment sketched on forever, luring Daeyoung’s mind into a splendid wonderland. He could feel his limbs itching for some sensation or the way butterflies fluttered in his stomach. The taller tilted his head to deepen the kiss, hands falling lower while his tongue was about to travel elsewhe-
“I really love the presents, you know.” Oh no, Daeyoung knew and dreaded this tone of voice for dear life. Riku’s face was now leaning backwards from his warmth. Daeyoung’s heartbeat raced vigorously at the older’s raised eyebrows. No no no, what else have I done? Or not done? Please don’t get mad at me. Daeyoung prayed to himself.
“As much as I enjoy each of the gifts you bought me, there’s still something missing.” Riku dragged out his voice at the end of the sentence. What he also managed to stretch was the tension creeping up Daeyoung’s body.
“I’m sorry, hyung.” Daeyoung’s voice trembled, tears threatened to build up. “C-could you tell me what I missed? I promise to make up to you right now.” At this point, Daeyoung would have been begging on his knees had it not been for Riku’s grip around his arms.
“I don’t know. There’s still one present left and you didn’t tell me to unwrap it.” Riku’s head tilted to the side.
Upon hearing the words, Daeyoung’s neck snapped back on the bed. But all the four presents were laying on the bed’s cover while the boxes and wrapping papers were at the nightstand’s leg. Had he bought a fifth present? No, right…? Honestly, Daeyoung couldn’t think straight anymore because Riku’s sharp gaze was starting to dig holes on his face.
“W-w-what is it, hyung?” Beads of sweat formed on his forehead, and Daeyoung prayed Riku didn’t see that.
However, the universe seemed to turn its back on Daeyoung because Riku noticed his pathetic, nervous state. The older closed the distance, the sweeteningly dangerous smirk not leaving his beautiful face. His eyes now flickered through Daeyoung’s trembling lips, travelled to his burning ears, dropped to his neck as Daeyoung tried to swallow his unease, then finally settled on his concerned face. His hands no longer held contact with Daeyoung’s arms and instead tugged the hem of his polo. Riku’s eyes shone with mischief, front teeth biting the plum lips teasingly. The playful act could have excited Daeyoung on a normal day, but the growing worry stopped him from enjoying the close distance.
“Hmmm… You.” The answer was finally revealed after an infinity. Daeyoung’s pulse turned erratic. Before the taller man could make sense of what was going on, Riku’s lips were once again on his, sucking the tension out of his body. In no time, Riku’s hands caressed the hidden toned abdomen. Daeyoung reciprocated the sensation by leading them both to bed, letting Riku climb on top of him and unwrap the most anticipated, expensive, and treasured present. The night would last so, so long, it seemed.
And Daeyoung reminded himself to book a cardiology appointment the next morning.
------
In theory, their shared apartment and growing affection should keep Daeyoung happy. He felt ecstatic and grateful to spend his daily life with Riku, he truly did. Since the older’s birthday, their love grew stronger and louder, and Daeyoung’s life could not become any brighter.
But with happiness, an ugly emotion appeared under the name of jealousy.
And Daeyoung would never admit it aloud because he himself knew how stupid the jealousy sounded. Still, Daeyoung found no strength to bury this feeling.
What once felt like the perfect present had now become his formidable opponent. Kuri – the name his lover gave to the kitten plushie – kept glaring at him with a challenging look. Daeyoung should have known those eyes screamed danger in the first place.
The night of Riku’s birthday was a new height of their relationship. Emotions and love confessions were exchanged effortlessly, leaving them both heaving for calmness even though their bodies and sentiment never took a break. Daeyoung could recall vividly the sight of his true love’s eyes gleaming with euphoria and how well that petite body fit in his embrace. Even when everything winded down, as Riku lay his head on the younger’s chest, Daeyoung remembered how content he had been.
Well, not anymore it seemed. Because from the following night on, Kuri had made its permanent annoying presence on their shared bed. Emphasis on the “permanent”.
Once the night settled, Riku as usual would join him in bed after a long, warm shower and dressed in a comfortable kuromi pyjama set. Sometimes, the Japanese lover boy would steal the lover’s clothes, making his smaller frame swim in the oversized shirts. That mere view could make Daeyoung’s heart flutter like an eager teenager, although the cardiologist said there was nothing wrong with Daeyoung’s physical wellbeing.
But Riku unknowingly had this painful, gruesome, torturous method to calm his frantic heartbeats. Right after snuggling under the lightweight blanket, the pre-birthday Riku used to either throw his body on top of Daeyoung’s or wrap his aching limbs on his body. Then, Daeyoung would give him an immediate hug, showering his face with affection, and they both shared random jokes and banters till their eyelids got too heavy. That was the ideal bedtime in Daeyoung’s humble opinion. He naively believed Riku shared the same idea, yet it was not the case anymore.
Because now, like many previous nights, his dearest angel curled up on the bed while the thing embraced tightly in Riku’s arms was no longer a Daegu-born man named Kim Daeyoung, but rather a cheap ass stuffed cat named Kuri (the plushie was a high-priced present, and Daeyoung never disclosed the number on its price tag). That loathsome traitor rested peacefully in his lover’s hold, face buried in Riku’s neck, stealing the promised warmth from her Korean co-owner. What frustrated him more was how Riku – the usually quick-witted and observant man – failed to notice his dissatisfaction. Of course, Daeyoung was a generous man. Everyone who knew him would give such a description for the man. However, Riku was the one thing Daeyoung never allowed others to have. Yet here he was, every night, watching the love of his life rolling enthusiastically on the bed with a doll pressed tightly to his chest, planting kisses on that damn kitten’s face and whispering sweet nothings to its deaf fake ears.
However, before Daeyoung could gather all the jealousy to knit his eyebrows in annoyance (as if he had ever done so), Riku would turn to him, seal their lips in a heavenly goodnight kiss and mumble lullaby-like melodies to his ears. Daeyoung’s heart softened at each touch. The man found his body starting to relax until Riku made some space between them, making room for the fabric and polyester stuffing presence. Daeyoung silently groaned, fighting the nasty urge to kick that teddy bear out of bed. But the sight of Riku’s slow, rhythmic exhalation and his lovely pout always eased the knot in Daeyoung’s heart, inviting sleep into this mind.
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The jealousy was fostered slowly yet consistently with every passing day. Daeyoung told himself to get over this nonsense negativity, because how could a soulless, synthetic, without-a-heart object do any harm? Stupid, careless Daeyoung. Of course it could, and his distress aged like milk. As summer was in full swing and Riku could not bear the melting heat at night, no more hugging or cuddling was allowed during sleep hours. Some days, when the air conditioner was turned on and Riku’s body temperature cooled down, their limbs would stay tangled the whole night, yet Riku’s arms never found his. Those tanned, slender arms would, heartbreakingly, secure a black plushie throughout the night and not wrap around his waist even once. The remaining days witnessed Riku turning his back to Daeyoung, sharing sweet dreams to the cussed Kuri.
It was not like Daeyoung had not tried anything to get rid of that parasite. A few days, when Daeyoung’s soul got possessed by a demon, he would throw Kuri under the bed and not feel a hint of guilt. Nevertheless, his dearest boyfriend always found the toy, dusting its fur with delicate touches, mumbling honey-like apologies for accidentally knocking Kuri out of the bed and brushing his luscious lips on her chestnut hat. Other days, while Daeyoung was confident he had successfully distracted the older after some bedtime cardio exercises, Riku would miraculously realise the absence of a much-despised Kuri on their then-clean bedsheet and hurried Daeyoung to fetch her. “I can’t abandon my daughter.” Riku always used the same excuse and those hamster-like pleading eyes. And of course, Daeyoung was bitterly reminded of that fact he never learnt to how say no.
The most expensive lesson the Korean man had was unfortunately a mind-opening lecture about pronouns, inclusion and acceptance. In the glamorous 21st century, Kim Daeyoung – a proud gay man with a committed, long-term relationship, who was never afraid to declare his love publicly, who was supportive of his queer friends, who never once hesitant to welcome trans people in his class and workplace – learned that pronouns were not some aesthetic terminologies for show. You must respect other people’s identity and their preferred pronouns. And “other people” included a motionless cat, which – in Daeyoung’s defence – is stuffed with polyester fibre and has no vital signs. Yet his partner was blinded by (unrequited) love and failed to see Kuri for whatever that doll actually was. Riku looked at the damn kitten with unwavering affection in his eyes, referring to Kuri as “my child”, “my daughter”, “our daughter”. The shared custody meant the world to Daeyoung, before he realised the Fukui-native didn’t those endearments as a joke. Because one night, as Daeyoung held the plushie by its ear and got smacked by a displeased boyfriend, the attention-deficient man complained:
“It is just a doll.”
Dumbass statement. For Riku, the stuffed kitten was more than “just a doll”. Kuri was the perfect representation of Daeyoung’s observant, considerate love and a flawless replication of her Japanese caregiver – tanned skin, adorable, aegyo machine, feline-like features. But the younger’s biggest mistake was addressing Kuri as “it”. Yes, Daeyoung is a rational man and he still firmly believes that’s how you call a teddy bear. No, Daeyoung never disobeys Riku and his absurd commands. A much too long Japanese-Korean mixed monologue, no chance to defend himself and one night spent on the living room’s couch was enough for the defeated man to avoid his deadly mistake for life.
Daeyoung’s most liked day was now laundry day. Being a tidy person and sharing an apartment with a clean freak never made him enjoy laundering by default. Yet, people can change over time, who knows. The frequency of their laundry days increased, and Riku was happy to enjoy new, fresh-scented pillow and bed cover every other week. On the other hand, for Daeyoung, it was the easiest, smoothest, most natural reason to get Kuri out of sight. For sanitary concerns, Daeyoung convinced the older that washing the bed linen and in extension, whatever on the bed, should be done regularly for better skin and improved sleep quality. The Japanese angel happily agreed to Daeyoung’s words. Therefore, every time Kuri was left miserably alone in the laundry room to dry, Daeyoung could proudly claim Riku all for himself, showering his lover with all the kisses and pampering he desired.
But bedding laundry couldn’t be done every other day, and despite Daeyoung going to great lengths to erase Kuri’s presence on the two-person bed, the kitten doll still lay on the mattress, mocking his irritation every night. “Betrayer.” He whispered to the toy. What kind of daughter that kept taking her dad’s affection from her other dad? “I bought you and now you’re stealing Riku hyung from me!” Daeyoung pointed an accusing finger to Kuri’s chest. The silent treatment Kuri gave him stirred up the suppressed resentment inside Daeyoung’s mind.
------
Last week alone, Daeyoung had changed the bed linen twice, and he all acted clueless when Riku found his favourite teddy bear under the bed frame, beside the nightstand’s legs or even in their wardrobe. “My bad, hyung. I may have put her there in mistake.” Daeyoung apologised, yet his voice carried no hint of remorse or regret. Daeyoung knew he had acted unsubtly, but his patience was wearing thinner as days went by. In some unknown miraculous way, Riku always found that loathed, cursed, punchable stuffed animal. The young heart’s true owner would laugh at his feigned clumsiness, cooing at his insincere excuses and planted a heartwarming peck on Daeyoung’s cheek. Daeyoung thought he could settle with that, he naively did. After all, he was just a man, and what man could live with an outsider’s residence on their bed? Certainly not Kim Daeyoung. He had made up his mind. Tomorrow night, he would talk to Riku about the misery eating up his mind. Because like the American psychotherapist Virginia Satir once said: “Communication is to relationships what breath is to life.” (Daeyoung came across this quotation when he was gathering the courage to speak up to Riku, never tell the older about that!)
🌳
Okay, no. Daeyoung has been painfully wrong. There is simply no way he could express his innermost (and ugly, unplanned, childish) feelings. What did he think the previous night?
‘Hey, Riku hyung. I hate your doll. Get rid of it and hug me instead.’ How mature.
‘I found lice and bed bugs on Kuri. We have to get rid of her.’ Impossible. Riku will certainly burn all the bed sheet and pillowcases, then demanded quarantine till he was sure no parasitic insects remained in their home.
‘I got you a new plushie. Try it out.’ Instant no. He had to compete with one Kuri, and that was insufferable enough. Two Kuri in the house? Consider him dead.
No idea seems reasonable in his head. Daeyoung should have known better than to trouble himself with that hideous envy. Or worse, Daeyoung should have known better than to bring the little demon home. But the constant joyful look on his boyfriend’s face when hugging the doll cleared all the doubt and uncertainty of the purchase. Now, the price he must pay for his lover’s happiness is too much, too expensive. He cannot tolerate this non-speaking, non-breathing, noninteractive existence’s disdainful, sarcastic grin or its provoking, testing glare. How can he express his unjust jealousy in the most mature, grown-up, acceptable way though? Is that even possible? How will the love of his life react?... With both hands clutching his hair, Daeyoung mindlessly paces around the bedroom, failing to register Riku’s presence by the door.
“Jagi, what are you doing?”
The gentle question startles him, making Daeyoung leap up. Riku’s puzzled eyes scan his beloved boyfriend, taking notes of his tousled hair and strained expression. The older’s mind races instantly, worries begin to take hold in his thoughts.
“Are you alright, Daeyoung? What happened?” Riku quickened his steps to Daeyoung’s side.
“Nothing important, hyung! When did you get home? I didn’t hear you.” Daeyoung forces an awkward smile and changes the topic, desperately wanting to drop the god forbidden subject. Once again, Riku does not share the same idea.
“I got off work early, wanted to surprise you. What’s troubling your head, love? Will you please tell me?”
Daeyoung thinks life is never fair and he is the black sheep of the universe. Because Riku is now looking up at him was that signature killer pout while his bubble-like, shimmering eyes stares into a firmly locked door deep in the younger’s soul. Daeyoung has never learnt how to say no, and this is the moment he regrets it the most. Because a pouty, teary, pleading Riku equals to a hopelessly complying, obedient Daeyoung.
The longer Riku stares at him, the weaker Daeyoung’s resistance becomes. He lets out a weary, fragile sigh before reaching for the older’s hands.
“Can you promise not to laugh at me?”
Riku’s frown deepens, confusion engulfing his thoughts. He nods regardless, wanting to be the most reliable, secure anchor for his lover. “Yes, love. I’ll always have your back.”
Daeyoung’s eyes feel a bit itchy and watery. Shame floods his mind for the nonsense, rubbish discomfort he has pushed himself into. But there is no escape from this. Riku has walked into his mental breakdown, and the persistent man can get much too stubborn if Daeyoung decides to play the situation down. He takes a few deep breaths, calming the sped-up pulse, knowing too well his beloved will be patiently waiting for him to speak up.
“… Y-you know how I’ve been obsessed with laundry and changing linens these days?”
Daeyoung ducks his head in shame, wanting to escape Riku’s soul-bearing gaze. His lover holds Daeyoung’s face in the well-acquainted tender hands, thumbs trace comforting circles on the younger’s cheeks. He gives a quiet nod, encouraging Daeyoung to continue.
“…” He has to keep going. Their love is always the strongest force, and Riku’s unwavering consolation reminds him of how much their relationship means. No obstacle can weaken their bond or his devotion to the older.
“I don’t want Kuri on our bed anymore. You are always hugging her at night, and I got my cuddle privilege taken away. I know it’s some unjustified jealousy, but it has been pestering my mind and eating me up for so long.” The words tumble out at lightning speed, and Daeyoung’s eyes instantly shut close after the last syllable leaves his mouth. It turns out speaking up is much easier than Daeyoung has expected, it is however the listener’s reaction that urges him to book another cardiology appointment.
After mentally counting to ten and hearing no response from Riku, the Korean man finally gathers the remaining courage to open his eyes. But the sight in front of him is not something Daeyoung has anticipated. Call him an emotional masochist all you want, the young man had expected a much-annoyed Riku scolding him for the childish feeling, or at least an unbothered version who waves his hand at the gibberish confession. What he has failed to expect, and is happening in front of his eyes, is Riku’s blushed face from struggling to suppressing a grin. Water wells up at the corner of his darling’s eyes, whilst those tears appear to come from amusement, unlike Daeyoung whose eyes are brimming with self-reproach.
Riku’s warm, small hands never leave his face, and his now blooming grin lights up the whole room as well as Daeyoung’s heart. This reaction is far from his imagination, maybe Daeyoung should be grateful to have such an understanding lover. Perhaps, he could change his surname to Maeda in appreciation for the other’s empathetic heart-
“Hahahahaha!! Really? You are jealous with Kuri? All this time and I didn’t notice that? I’m sorry Daeng but this is hilarious!” Riku bends over, body shaken violently. His face scrunches up, tears stream down the flushed cheeks and laughter escapes him exhilaratingly. The older’s grips fall to his broad shoulders, squeezing and shaking Daeyoung aggressively. Words taken back, this reaction is still a far cry from imagination but now less comforting than the earlier silence.
Eventually, Riku’s manic laughter subsides, leaving the scene a breathless Japanese man and a way too uneasy Korean partner.
“Haha... This is the highlight of the week Daeyoung ah!” Riku’s trembling finger wipes the remaining tears on his own face. His contorted face finally relaxes while he slowly regains his composure. “Ahhh I’m so honoured. I didn’t realise you have been so attention deprived, Daengie.” Although Riku coos sweetly at his dismay, the soothing words come out with that joking, teasing tone of him. Daeyoung face once again reddens with shame. He turns his neck to the side, completely avoiding his lover’s playful banter.
“Ugh I shouldn’t have told you that. Now you’re just laughing at my miserable suffering.”
“I’m sorr- Hahaha. No no!! I’m sincerely sorry, Youngie.” Riku tried to bring Daeyoung’s face to his eye level. The wide smile on the older’s face brings an overwhelming warmth to Daeyoung’s heart, yet he still holds the unrealistic wish he was not the reason for all those uncontrollable cackles.
When Daeyoung refuses to meet his eyes for the third time and occupies himself with fidgeting fingers, Riku decides to leave all the laughter aside. Whereas this is a remarkable topic to tease his Daengie about, what matters most is making sure his lunatic reaction does not make the younger doubt their love.
“Youngie, could you look me in the eyes, please?” The pleading tone sounds like golden honey to Daeyoung’s ears. The Korean man makes another necessary note to book a cardiology appointment and search Youtube for a how-to-decline-someone instruction video.
Though hesitation and embarrassment still linger in his mind, Daeyoung’s eyes make their way and dive into the longing, tender affectionate of Riku’s.
“I’m sorry for laughing at you. I just… didn’t know about your jealousy.” Riku continues.
“Can you not call it jealousy, hyung?” Daeyoung defends weakly.
“You labelled it first, I’m just following your lead.” Even though Riku’s composure threatens to crack once more, he demands himself to stay collected before he can make the younger turn into a boiled lobster.
“But it’s really sweet though! I love how you got possessive over your own harmless present.”
Riku is wrong. So wrong. The wicked doll is not as innocent as it seems, and Daeyoung just has to prove it.
“Your hands were always occupied with it, and I couldn’t cuddle with you for the past months.”
The older lets out another crushed giggle and immediately goes back to his full-on consoling mode for the sulky man. Who can know his giant, muscular partner could turn into such a lovable, dummy puppy like this.
“Awww. Did I unintentionally hurt your feelings? My poor Daeyoungie. I’m genuinely, earnestly, honestly sorry, jagi-ah. Will you forgive my negligence, love?”
Of all the things Daeyoung tells himself to learn how to decline, he will never find it in him to turn down the shorter’s endearment. With the expecting look on the other’s face, Daeyoung lowers his head, letting their foreheads resting against each other before speaking his heart.
“Of course I will, hyung. I love you so much.”
At the end of his words, Riku’s soft lips search for his own in an undeniable hurry. Daeyoung leans downwards a bit more, letting the older take the lead while his arms hold the familiar thin waist like a habit.
The kiss helps Daeyoung realise how little his distress means, along with how loving and caring his gorgeous soulmate has always been. His heart smoothens while his mind gets flooded with strong waves of ease and fulfilment. It seems as if Riku were now allowing him to reclaim all the long due attention and focus.
“Well, since it is my fault and I have hurt your feelings for sooo long,” Riku stretches the last words, “I think it’s only fair that I make it up for you now.”
“Make it up for me?” Daeyoung’s dumbfounded expression pushes Riku to stop wasting any more precious minute.
“Yes. Will you let me, jagi?” The naughty, misbehaving hands crawl under his sleeveless top. Riku’s dreamy eyes travel across his handsome features, daring him to refuse. Oh god, Kim Daeyoung is just a weak, helpless, needy man.
That night, Riku sticks to his word. He selflessly shows Daeyoung how much the younger means to him, how the Korean’s athletic body is always his most favourite hug pillow, and how much Riku has always desired his lover. Somewhere in the middle of their business, with Riku’s chest glued tightly to his, hips rocking with rhythmic, sensual movements, both exchanging short breaths and sweet nothings between unbroken kisses, Daeyoung’s eyes land on the forgotten kitten at the opposite cabinet. The poor audience is now meters away, incapable of shielding its uncorrupted eyes from the obscene view. If Kuri were their real daughter, Daeyoung would have buried himself alive for staining her ears with these indecent, lewd panting and moaning. But joke’s on Kuri. Victory is now on the Daegu-native’s side, making him cast a triumphant, smug look at the poor stuffed kitten.
🐈⬛
Kim Daeyoung may have spoken too soon, because the plush kitty is still present on their bed. The following night, when Daeyoung’s sour attention is on the cursed doll, Riku has laughed with delight and told him. “But she is the best gift I have ever received. Please, Daeyoungie. Don’t throw her out of the bed again, pleaseee.”
The dragged voice makes Daeyoung slap himself mentally. He has mistakenly forgotten two most important things – how much power a stubborn Maeda Riku can be, and the Youtube how-to-decline-someone instruction video. He genuinely wants to say “No, Riku. We can’t keep a stuffed animal on the bed. You have me and I’m the best hug pillow you could ever ask for.” In contrast to the silent disapproval, his weak, fragile willpower surrenders, making his head nod involuntarily.
Riku giggles at the gloomy, discouraged boyfriend and hurried them both to bed. The older plants endless chaste kisses on his face, his neck, his chest, giving him numerous reassurances that Kuri will not steal his attention and cuddle any more. Daeyoung blindly agrees. At least right now, he is the one receiving all the smooches and intimacy from his favourite hyung other than some blank-faced daredevil.
🐕
Kim Daeyoung’s most cherished time of the day is still his bedtime. However, after the serious(ly comical) talk that night, Riku still sneaks his most hated stuffed kitten on bed every now and then. Each time Daeyoung’s eyebrows knit at its presence, Riku’s chuckles echoes in their bedroom and the older promises to hug only him throughout the night. But sometimes, men lie and so does his beloved. Daeyoung will occasionally wake up in the middle of the night just to find his partner lying on the other side of the bed, knees pulling toward his torso while his arms are busy wrapping around the black beanie cat. With untamed jealousy crawling in the back of his head, Daeyoung always inches closer, enveloping the other in his sweet embrace. And in the morning, Riku will straight up laugh at him in the face, then give his cheeks apologetic pecks the next moment. The comforting act erases all the childish bitterness in his heart, reminding him who takes first place in Riku’s heart.
Today, a supposedly relaxing Friday when Daeyoung has to spend at work for some overtime tasks, the Korean smitten lover shuffles home exhaustedly. His body aches from head to toe, craving some high-quality, uninterrupted cuddles and bodily warmth. The dinner he had earlier at work tasted so bland, failing to compete with the appetising homemade meals shared with Riku at home. Daeyoung throws the leather bag over one shoulder, fumbling with the key to the main door.
Shoes placed neatly in the doorway wardrobe, Daeyoung makes his way inside, expecting to see Riku sleeping soundly on the bed. Instead, he is met with his dear boyfriend running into his arms, attacking his face with sloppy welcome kisses.
“Okaeri, Daeyoung-chan! Are you hungry? Are you tired?”
“Hyung, shouldn’t you be sleeping now? Have you been waiting for me the whole night?” Daeyoung’s eyes glance to the nearby clock, its hands ticking closer to midnight leaves him nervous for poor Riku staying up alone in the living room.
“Aww. No problem. I can’t sleep without you by my side, you know that.” Riku kisses the answer into his lips, successfully bringing a small, dimpled grin on the younger’s troubled face. The Japanese beauty leads him to their bedroom, sparkle does not go unnoticed in his eyes. “And I may have a present to give you.”
“What’s the present, princess?” Excitement builds up, knocking the last hint of drowsiness out of his mind. Bedroom and surprise usually mean one thing, right?
Still, the presence of a large, nicely wrapped box on the bed is not a predictable sight for Daeyoung. He very much has been visualising a less covered, preferably barely dressed treat lying beneath his weight rather than a tangible, questionable mystery. Nonetheless, Riku’s expectant gaze motivates him to open the present. With that, Daeyoung’s long fingers tear the wrapping papers with care.
This cute, fluffy, cuddly stuffed puppy is the last thing Daeyoung has on his imaginary wish list. However, the look in Riku’s eyes and the double check all over the creamy plushie tell him it is real. This silly-faced puppy has a green music note sewn in front of its chest and a green microphone on the right hand. If this were a person, surely the teddy bear would be an enthusiastic singer.
“So, what do you think? Do you like it?”
“I like it, Riku hyung. But… what is this stuffed puppy for?” Daeyoung’s clueless expression does not ease a bit. He remembers not asking for a teddy bear for ages and is sure both he and Riku know the latter is always his most favourable pillow to embrace.
“Hehe. I bought Daengtriever for Kuri. How is it?” Riku bounces on his feet, looking up at the young man with excitement.
“For Kuri, your stuffed cat?... And it has a name already?”
Riku laughs aloud at his clueless face. He takes the toy from Daeyoung’s hands and collects Kuri from the other side of the room.
“I notice how your jealousy for Kuri still lingers.” The playful smirk displays on Riku’s gorgeous face is not helping him. Daeyoung’s hands cover his burning face, begging for an underground hole to swallow him in an instance.
“Nooooo! Please stop hyung, I’m so embarrassed right now.” The truth is too humiliating for him to deny.
Riku’s body shakes with laughter, but he inches forward to remove Daeyoung’s hands from the taller’s face. He then places another gentle kiss on the younger’s lips, looking at Daeyoung with all the affectionate fondness from his heart.
“I know you’re mad that Kuri sometimes steals me away from you. So, I decided to bring her a friend. I cannot leave either my love or my daughter lonely and sullen, right?”
The reason sounds so hilarious and stupid that Daeyoung wants to laugh. Nevertheless, he casts his eyes to the two dolls laying peacefully on the bed cover. After a minute of inner debate, he speaks up.
“Then, from now on, Kuri will sleep with Daeng... Daengtri-”
“Daengtriever. That’s right.” Riku helped him with the name. “And he looks just like you. Kim Daeyoung but in the shape of a golden retriever.”
Daeyoung examines the creamy puppy. Sure, with a barely concealed love for singing and a dumb smile decorating its idiotic face, it is no wonder this present is a replica of him. Daeyoung bursts into laughter, seeing where Riku is heading at.
“And now I can have you all to myself?”
“Yes! Because now mini me have mini you as a forever company.” Riku replies enthusiastically.
This silly present shouldn’t have made Daeyoung feel this ecstasy. Yet it does, and here he is, spinning Riku around and rambling “I love you” mantras to his ears. Both of them exchange nonstop giggles and messy smooches, and Riku’s lithe legs have wrapped around the younger’s hips since who knows when.
“Since Kuri is promoted to a permanent vacation, should we throw a small celebration tonight?” Daeyoung arches an impish eyebrow, hands dropping down to his lover’s behind to support Riku’s weight.
“I thought you’ll never ask.” Their lips rejoin in a slow, romantic waltz. No music is needed, as their much familiar body find their own mutual, intimate pace. This Friday night has lasted too long at work, but Daeyoung doesn’t mind extending their happy moment until dawn.