Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

studio

chat : studio girlz (+ jimin <3)

J: have you guys talked to that new guy?
J: i just ran into him in the kitchen and I'm traumatised i think

C: ????
C: jungkook you mean? I haven't talked to him much :(

J: i just tried to make some small talk and he like stared me down
J: so intense
J: i thought he wanted to fight me

C: it's true he has this way of staring
C: i got all shy
C: do you think he likes me?

M: he hasn't ever looked at me in the eyes
M: it's like he avoids it?
M: maybe that means he likes ME

L: i have literally only ever seen him with sunglasses on
L: even indoors
L: like what even is that? is he trying to be cool?

C: he IS cool
C: silent brooding type
C: handsome

J: : I think he's weird
J: he's got this KEEP OUT vibe

JM: aren't you guys are being so dramatic over this
JM: just because he's new?

M: new and MYSTERIOUS jimin-ah
M: don't you agree?

JM: haven't really talked to him much yet !

J: talk to him and you'll see
J: he is wall. solid stone. hadn't spoken to any of us
in more than a month other than hello and goodbye!!

M: maybe he's a private person!

L: i think it's rude

C: you're just saying that bc you don't think he's hot

L: sorry for being enlightened and liking women

M: we need a tie breaker
M: @jimin it's up to you

JM: challenge accepted :)

corridor.

The door to Jungkook's studio is closed, which is already something.

Jimin's been here for a year already, and he's never seen anyone's door as closed as often as Jungkook's. Fifteen artists scattered over five floors, and Jungkook is the only one with a closed door policy.

But just as well as doors close, they can open.

He's glimpsed at Jungkook in the corridors and heard tale of him from the group chat, but he's never actually had a real conversation with him. As the only other guy in a building full of girls, he might be feeling as alone as Jimin had in the beginning, so it's only polite to extend a welcome invitation.

Definitely only because of that, and not because of the group's rabid curiosity.

There's no response to his first knock, and the second is met with silence too. He creaks the door open slowly, revealing a room filled with soft, yellow light.

Jeon Jungkook is bent over his pottery wheel with clay up to his elbows. Hair escapes from his bun to fall over his eyes, his black headphones completing the look of total concentration.

“Excuse me?”

Jimin doesn’t want to scare him, but he might have to. He uses the light trick. Jungkook startles a little when the switch flicks on and off, jerking his head up. He manoeuvres his headphones off. The wheel slows to a stop.

And then there's silence.

He is a bit intimidating, after-all, full black fit down to his apron and an arm full of tattoos. There's been an ongoing debate among st the rest of the artists over how many piercings he has, too—Jimin spies too many to count right now.

"Can I help you?"

“Hi," he ignores the gruff little tone, "I'm Park Jimin. I work upstairs. We crossed each other in the hallway a couple times. You're Jungkook, right?"

A nod.

"Nice to properly meet you." Jimin offers his friendliest smile, even though Jungkook is giving him nothing. Nothing to inform the asshole or heartthrob debate so far, just big unblinking eyes. "Not to interrupt, but some of us are getting lunch together. Wanna join?"

“Today?”

“Today,” Jimin confirms. “Like, now. Ten minutes?”

“Ah." Jungkook stares down at his wheel. A bowl, Jimin notices. It looks smooth and pretty; not that he knows anything about pottery. “I’m on a deadline with these. I’m behind schedule, so I’ll skip lunch.”

"You sure? Jooyeon-noona is choosing. She knows all the best places."

Jungkook wipes his hands on his apron, getting up with the barest huff, like he's realising Jimin won't be discouraged so easily. Seeing him on his feet, all Jimin can think is Tall. "I don't have time today."

Disappointing, but unsurprising. Jimin had kind of been expecting resistance, based on everyone's comments. Still, he won't give up yet.

“How about I bring you something back so you can eat it here? My treat. I’m older than you, aren’t I? I heard someone say you’re 97.”

“I am.”

“95,” Jimin says, pointing towards himself proudly, feeling a little taller. “I’ll bring you something back. What do you want?”

Jungkook's eyebrows twist into a frown. “I don’t want anything.”

“Come on, Jungkook-ssi, you can’t say no to free lunch!”

“I wasn’t going to have lunch today,” he repeats, slowly, like he's talking to a child. "I’ll eat later, at home.”

That tone again—Jimin almost feels scolded. Half a point for the asshole team, he thinks.

Alright then.

“Your loss.” One last try before awarding the full point, just to give Jungkook one more chance. “That's your order, yeah? You have many left?”

“Twenty bowls. It's custom for a local restaurant.”

"Oh, that's cool! Do you have a palette in mind for later, or—"

Jimin tries to walk further in, but Jungkook steps forward to block his way. “Sorry, but you can’t come in. I really need to concentrate.” Despite the slight head bow, he doesn’t seem apologetic at all. “I’m on a deadline. I wasn’t planning on taking a break.”

Damn.

He shrinks back, a little stung.

“I’ll leave you to your deadline, then.”

And then the headphones are back on, and Jimin is dismissed.

chat: studio girlz (+jimin<3)

D: why didn't he come again?

JM: said he was busy with a deadline custom order

L: did he say it nicely?

JM: not really?
JM: I was expecting resistance, i wasn't expecting complete failure :(

J: imagine being like that faced with the jimin charm!!
J: you see? BRICK. WALL.

shared kitchen

When Jimin pictured the life of an illustrator, he was picturing mornings like this one. In the zone in his sunny little studio, drawing, playing with colours and settings and moods—creativity, feeding his soul and his stomach both.

The post-in-the-zone crash is another business entirely, and he's learned that the only way to fight it is a sugar and caffeine break.

Since their kitchen has been out of commission since the fish-in-the-microwave incident, he makes his way down to the one on the fourth floor, already drooling over the thought of hot, strong coffee.

"—photography," he hears the voice of Nahyun-ssi as soon as he walks in, "and I have actually been looking for models."

"I see." Jungkook is pouring coffee into a mug as black as his outfit. He's not looking at Nahyun, concentrating on stirring some sugar into his drink, but she goes on.

"The project is really cool. It's all about bringing the unsaid to the surface. Being vulnerable, you know?"

Jimin roots through the fridge as he hears Jungkook ask, "And you said the concept was being topless?"

Jimin snorts—he can't help it. His brain is too tired for niceties right now. He coughs, though, in an effort to sound less rude. N turns her head towards him with a scowl, but dismisses him immediately, turning back to Jungkook with a flick of her ponytail. "Right. Interior, mood lighting. I'm thinking red, maybe, or—"

She drones on as Jungkook stirs and stirs, looking like he's dissociating completely.

He darts a look in Jimin's direction, and Jimin takes it as an SOS.

And yeah, last time they saw each other wasn't exactly successful, but Jimin believes in second chances.

"If I could just squeeze in here," he says, getting in between them to reach for the coffee pot, "thank you. So sorry."

Nahyun seems annoyed to be interrupted, and Jimin takes pleasure in it. She's one of the few girls here he doesn't get along with.

Jungkook places the sugar container close to Jimin silently.

"Oh, yes please," Jimin says with a smile, adding a generous spoonful to his coffee. "Boy, I was falling asleep up there. You guys too?"

"Guess you weren't doing anything exciting," Nahyun snarks.

Jimin's frozen smile does not waver. "Oh, I don't know. Double market value for a commission sounds pretty exciting to me." He cocks his head. "What's the budget for your," he waves his hand around, "topless thing?"

A vein is popping in her forehead. "It's crass to discuss money."

"Is it? Me and Jungkook-ssi love to talk numbers."

Jungkook, who had been quietly watching the exchange, nods. "I've been meaning to talk to you about that, Jimin-ssi. I want to re-price my new models, I was wondering if I could get your advice?"

"Absolutely!" Jimin beams. Look at them, teaming up! "This might take a while," he tells her, and wishes he too had a ponytail to flick.

Visibly pissed, she mutters, "I'll leave you to it, then?" She looks at Jungkook expectantly, but Jungkook only nods his goodbye.

Jimin waits until he hears the ding of the elevator to release his giggles. "Well played."

"Should be saying that to you." He looks serious as ever, but Jimin thinks he sounds a bit amused. "She had me cornered for ten minutes. This is my second cup."

Jimin hops onto the counter. "You must be well energised, then."

"Her conversation wasn't exactly riveting," he says, and off goes Jimin into giggles again. "You don't like her?"

"I don't," Jimin confirms, warming his hands around his mug. Oh, coffee, sugar, sticking it to N and gossiping with Jungkook? He's almost got his morning adrenaline rush back. "She brags way too much and she's always starting some kind of petty argument or other. She was all up in everyone's business last month over—"

Jungkook puts a hand up between them—this time he looks slightly more apologetic. Ten percent, if Jimin had to call it.

"Sorry," he says, "but I have to get back to work."

"Right." Really not a chatty guy, is he? "Of course. Cornering threw off your schedule, didn't it? Wouldn't want to be late on that deadline."

With a good afternoon, Jungkook and his black mug leave Jimin behind.

As he munches on a half-stale supermarket brownie, Jimin questions if he can consider this progress in the get to know Jeon Jungkook mission. Jungkook did cut him off immediately, after-all.

Still, that one flash-in-the-pan second they teamed up—perhaps that counts for something. It's not news enough to broadcast to the group chat, but he holds on to that little nugget of hope that they might be getting somewhere.

jungkook's studio

It's late, and Jimin's dizzy from a full day staring at a screen. It had been an admin sort of afternoon, which of course spilled out into admin evening, as it always does. He does tend to be the last one on days like these, so he makes a quick little check of his own floor to make sure noone's left anything on that could set the building on fire before moving downstairs to do the same…

Only to find light under Jungkook's door.

There's his chance. The two of them alone in the building at the end of the day. Surely Jungkook will entertain him for a bit, won't he? The girls are starting to get a bit obsessed. Every time they're out together, the Jungkook conversation dominates. Jimin would like him to be less of a goddamn mystery so they can put the matter to rest.

Music is spilling out of the room, a slow, old-timey balad sounding thing. Intriguing. He wouldn't have guessed Jungkook likes this type of music.

The song cuts off at Jimin's knock.

Jungkook looks a bit like the day stretched out way longer than expected for him too. One hand is painted with clay while another is dripping water down onto the floor, looking flushed and red.

"Going home soon?" Jimin asks.

"Yeah." His voice is tired, a little flat. "Washing up and going."

Definitely his chance. "I'll wait for you."

Jungkook frowns. "Why?"

"What, you want to be all alone in this giant, scary building? We're the last ones in."

Jungkook considers this, then backs away from the door slowly, leaving it open for Jimin to enter.

Jimin has only ever known this room empty, so he takes a curious look around.

Jungkook makes kitchenware, mostly--mugs and bowls and little plates, but what catches Jimin's eye are some little chopstick rests in the form of cute animals.

"These are adorable," he says, smiling at the sight of the smattering of cute pandas on their bellies. "Custom order too?"

"Gift for a friend," Jungkook responds from the little sink in the corner of the room. His voice harmonises with the sound of running water. It sounds softer, worn down. "They were too small for me. Painting them nicely was really difficult."

"Don't know much about ceramics, but they look great. I'm sure she'll appreciate them."

"It's a guy."

"He will, then."

He's not just saying this to get on Jungkook's good side. They're delicate things, obviously created and painted with the utmost care. One of them has a little uneven eye. "This one is my favourite."

Jungkook is suddenly over his shoulder, checking. "I messed that one up. You can have it."

Jimin laughs. "Thanks."

"I mean, I'm not—I'm not giving it to my friend. I'll give him a set of four, and this one is the messiest one, so I can't make that the gift." He frowns. "I didn't mean to say you should have the shitty one."

Jimin keeps laughing, hand over his mouth. "Right. Well, I'd love to take Mr Wonky over here."

"Have it. Him." He pauses. "Mr Wonky?"

Jimin takes it gently into his hands, the little panda lying down on its belly. "That's his name from now on. What's your last name again?" Like he doesn't know.

"Jeon."

"Then he's Jeon Wonky."

How Jungkook's face seems to be stuck in a permanent frown while still remaining undeniably adorable, Jimin doesn't know.

"Do you actually like it?"

"Him, Jungkook-ssi, him." He slips the panda gently into his pocket. "Say goodbye to your son. I'll take good care of him, don't worry."

As Jungkook finishes washing his hands—thoroughly enough to scrub them red—Jimin keeps looking around, looking for something. Decoration, a trace of personality, a hint of interest. Nothing. A black notebook on the desk. A black backpack on the floor. The mug, black too, at complete odds with the gentle earthen tones in the home-ware Jungkook has created, lining the shelves.

More and more, a mystery.

Jimin watches as Jungkook slips on a hat and a dark denim jacket, covering those pretty tattoos. He moves around his studio with steady grace, like he knows exactly where everything is even with his eyes closed.

And through it all, silent.

"Man, I'm hungry," Jimin says as the elevator swiftly brings them closer and closer to the end of the day. "Would die for something fried and cheese-filled right about now."

Jungkook flicks his eyes up from where he was picking at his nails trying to get the remnants of paint out—just for a second. "Right. It's dinner time."

"Are you having dinner?" Jimin asks, trying to sound casual. "Or are you skipping again for something more productive?"

"I am. I'm having a chicken salad. I have everything prepped already." He twists his nose a bit. "I'm not really in the mood for it."

Jimin's ears perk up—his chance, his chance, his chance. "Mm, doesn't sound great. Why don't—"

But the elevator dings, and Jungkook rushes to get out first, with an ever polite, ever formal goodnight, Jimin-ssi.

Jimin stands there, in the middle of the empty building, at a complete loss. Does this guy hate him or what?

chat: studio girlz (+jimin<3)

C: how's the mission going, jimin-ah?
C: any progress?

JM: found out he makes cute mugs!
JM: and makes handmade gifts for his friends

C: girlfriends???

JM: this one was a guy

C: thank god
C: what else

L: does no one else think it's weird this is all we talk about
L: why is jimin our jungkook spy all of a sudden?

C: cause as a guy, he has the easiest time getting close to him
C: i think he's shy with girls </3

L: i think he's rude with everyone
L: why are we wasting all this time on some asshole?

JM: that's harsh!
JM: he's not exactly a rain of sunshine, but
JM: i wouldn't call him an asshole. not yet, anyway

L: whatever
L: gonna mute this group if it's jungkook central
L: letting y'all know

building; exterior

Jimin isn't above admitting that he's starting to become a little bit obsessed with the Jungkook issue, too.

The more he thinks about him, the more things don't add up. No matter what the others say, Jungkook isn't a rude person. He's unflinchingly polite, if anything.

Why isn't Jimin getting anywhere, then?

Can it be that Jungkook can't take a hint? It's hard to tell what he's thinking with that constant poker-face.

So today, he's changing strategy. He's sucking on the dregs of his iced coffee and loitering outside their own building, waiting for Jungkook to come out.

When he does, he doesn’t even glance in Jimin’s direction, heading instead to the giant motorbike parked to the side.

“Oh, that’s yours?” Jimin asks, as if he doesn’t know. The subject of Jungkook and his motorbike dominated conversation among the girls for at least a week when he first joined them.

"Yes," Jungkook says, straddling it with ease. "It's mine."

“Can you drop me off somewhere? My ride bailed on me.”

He sees the gears turn in Jungkook's head for a long second before he says, “I have somewhere to be. I can’t be late.”

“The deadline excuse again? Come on, Jungkook-ssi.” He comes closer, putting a hand on the thing. “It won’t be that big a detour.”

“I can’t,” Jungkook repeats. “I’ll be late if I don’t go straight there.”

“You’ll leave me hanging, then. Fine.” He sighs dramatically. It's okay. He'd planned for resistance, this time. He taps the motorcycle like he's petting a dog’s back. “But how will you make it up to me?"

Jungkook frowns, pausing with the helmet halfway up. “Are you serious?”

“Don't I look serious?”

"How about you buy me a coffee tomorrow? Iced americano.” He smiles, plan executed to perfection. “My studio’s the second door to the left, top floor. I get here at nine, most days."

Jimin feels goosebumps start to raise under Jungkook's stare. Could it be he plays for the other team? Oh, those girls are going to be disappointed.

"Jimin-ssi—"

"Come on, Jungkook-ssi. Buy us both a coffee. Or do you prefer me to do it?" He leans onto the bike on his elbows. "But ah, you’ve already turned me down once, so I don’t think you’d accept this.”

"I didn't turn you down. I was behind on schedule.”

“Semantics.” Jimin waves him away, and backs away as the bike revs to life.

"I'm going now."

“Go, go. Live your perfectly scheduled life.” As the motorcycle starts to move, Jimin backs away, voice raising to be heard over the engine, “I’ll be mad if there’s no coffee tomorrow morning!”

He catches Jungkook flick his eyes towards him one last time through the mirror before he’s off, speeding away.

Much to his satisfaction, when he walks into his studio the next morning, he realises he's not the first.

Jungkook, much too put together for the early hour, is standing by the product shelves, browsing through Jimin's sticker sheets. It could be Jimin's sleepy, blurred eyes, but there might even be a slight smile on his face.

"That's the new collection." He drops his bag onto the desk, shedding his coat. In his baby blue sweater, he feels clownishly colourful next to Jungkook. "You like it?"

Jungkook hums. "I really like the colour palette. And the style, it's very… "

"Cute?" Jimin says, ready for the eye-roll. That's all he ever hears, and frankly, it's getting old.

"Expressive." He cocks his head to the side. "Although cute as well, I suppose. Are they selling well?"

"Not as well as your little pandas would sell, I'm sure." Standing next to Jungkook now, he nudges him. "Would you copyright strike me if I made a collection of wonky-eyed baby pandas?"

"I don't own the concept of pandas. They'd look nice in your style, I think." He clears his throat. "Anyway, I brought—" He jerks a hand in the coffee's direction on the desk, like he wants to be rid of it already, but something else catches Jimin's eye.

"Was that your appointment?" There's black nail polish there that wasn't there yesterday. It's perfectly done, shiny and pretty. Jimin catches Jungkook's hand, holding it steady. "Getting your nails done?"

"Yeah." The hand gets pulled away and shoved into a pocket. Jungkook's shoulders hunch. "Your coffee's there."

"Ah, Jungkook-ssi, thank you. I didn't think you actually would."

Jimin nearly moans after the first delicious, life saving sip, stepping back to give Jungkook some space.

"Didn't want to start a fight or anything." With one last look at the stickers and prints strewn over Jimin's desk, he brushes past him, brusque as ever.

He hesitates at the door, one hand at the handle.

"My chopstick rest."

Jimin smiles. "Your son, you mean?"

"It's not here. What did you do with it?"

"I brought him home, of course. He's on my nightstand, keeping me company."

Jungkook looks at him for one more long second before nodding and leaving, pulling the door shut with a click.

chat: studio girlz (+jimin<3)

JM: [jpegattached]
JM: i think i'm getting somewhere!

C: yay jimin!! <33

L: [eyerollemoji]

rooftop party

In the midst of commission rush and plain old life, the end of the year creeps up, and so does the office Christmas party.

Rooftop parties aren’t exactly ideal for December, but everyone’s taken that as an excuse to warm up through drinking. It's been going for a few hours now already, so the music’s getting louder and louder, the make-shift dance floor fuller by the minute.

Jimin's already loose from several drinks on an empty stomach. He feeds on the buzzing, happy energy of people around him, but when he stumbles one too many times, it becomes clear he needs to get some food in his belly or terrible things will happen; namely, headaches and hungovers.

He tells the girls, dancing in a little huddle around him, "I'll be right back."

"Oh, oh,” Jooyeon says eagerly, grabbing his wrist, “are you going to the buffet?"

"Yeah? Why, you want me to bring you something?"

She tsks. "No, Jimin-ah, look!"

Ah.

Behind the buffet table, holding a beer can so tight it has caved in a little, is Jeon Jungkook in all his somber glory. Whatever stress everyone else has shaken loose seems to rests on his shoulders. He stands rigid, straight-backed and still.

"Go talk to him!" Chohui whispers at him as she shoos him away. "Get him to come dance!"

"As if," Jimin says with an eye-roll. “Does that look like a guy that will dance?”

"Try, try!"

He gets ushered away without another word, leaving a trail of giggles in his wake.

Jungkook watches him approach, silent as always.

Jimin will not let those big dark eyes intimidate him. "Are you guarding the buffet, Jungkook-ssi?"

Jungkook's look turns into almost a glare. "No."

"Mm. Could it be that you don’t know what you want?” No answer. “Well, these," Jimin picks up one of the little pizzas, "are delicious. Very cheesy." He brings it close to Jungkook's mouth. "Open up."

Jungkook looks between him and the pizza like Jimin is trying to feed him poison. Honestly, it's getting a bit old. Has this guy ever smiled in his entire life?

"No? Suit yourself." Jimin eats it in one bite, humming approvingly. "Yum." He feels like bugging Jungkook, so he leans into him, pretending he's looking over his other side. "Mm, what else do we have here?"

He grabs a sausage roll in the end, munching happily. He licks his fingers clean, and almost smirks when he catches Jungkook's eyes lingering.

"Did you dance?" He knows Jungkook didn't.

"I don't like dancing."

"Why am I not surprised," Jimin mutters, grabbing another sausage roll. He leans his hip into the table this time, turning to Jungkook, dropping the teasing. Suddenly, this whole back and forth makes him tired. "What do you like, Jungkook-ssi? Outside of work? One thing."

"Why?"

"What, why? Can't I make conversation? Especially up here with no door to close in my face."

"I—" Jungkook seems stunned, and a little embarrassed. "I don't—"

"You do, every single time. What, am I that annoying?"

"I just don't know what you want from me."

Well, that's a bit dramatic. "Thought trying to get to know the new guy might be nice. I was the new guy, once, you know? I know what it's like."

"Is that it?"

What is this, even? "Of course that's it!"

"Really? Because I heard you speaking to the others.” Jungkook looks upset now, but before Jimin feels vindication at finally pulling real emotion out of him, he continues, "Talking about getting close to me. They called it your mission. So excuse me if I find that new guy stuff hard to believe."

Fuck.

"Jungkook-ssi—no." He puts his drink down, suddenly dizzyingly sober. Fuck, he’s mortified. "It wasn't anything like that."

"So you didn't have that conversation?"

The stare is becoming hard to endure. "I… I did, but—"

"I see you talking about me. I know you do. I'm not saying it to be full of myself or whatever, but I can tell. I walk into a room sometimes and you stop talking, start giggling."

"We're not making fun of you, I swear!" Fuck, he feels so terrible. "We're—fuck, okay. Half my friend group here has a crush on you, okay? And they've all been pushing me to talk to you, because if you're close to me, then you'll be in our circle, and they'll have a shot." He doesn't mention the other half of his friend group that think Jungkook is a rude asshole.

"Crush." He blinks. "Really?"

"Really," Jimin promises. "It sounds stupid, but I swear, that's it."

Jungkook watches him, big eyes intense. "So it really wasn't to make fun of me?"

"No.” Jimin steps closer to him. "Of course it wasn't! Why would you think that?"

"In my experience, when people act that way, it's either to flirt with me or to make fun of me."

"You say that like it happens all the time."

"It does."

"What, you're that bad at reading people? You're a bit awkward, sure, but…" His brain catches up with his mouth. "Sorry. Rude. I'm a few drinks in." He needs to stop making an absolute ass of himself. Concentrate, Jimin. "And sorry for our behaviour. It was immature. We didn't mean any harm, but I apologise for causing it anyway."

Things got so serious so fast, and Jungkook seems to be suffering from the same sort of whiplash. "Thanks," he mutters, a little lost and soft. "Thanks for saying that."

"Yeah." Jimin licks his lips, feeling like he needs to apologise again. "I was trying to trick you or anything, I swear. Or act like I know you, or anything."

"I mean… you're not so wrong about it."

"Still, I shouldn't have said it."

"I'd rather hear things as they are." He sounds as close to truly awkward now as Jimin's ever heard him. "I can be clueless. It's because I'm autistic."

The whiplash just doesn't end. "Autistic?"

"Yes." He seems a bit embarrassed now, but he pushes on, "so that means… well, it means a lot of things, but one of them is that I can't read people very well sometimes. I try, but I get it wrong often. I just." He's been fidgeting with the tab of his beer can, Jimin realises. "Wasn't sure what you were trying to do, talking to me like that. Asking me to bring you coffee and everything."

That might be the most he's ever heard Jungkook say all at once, and he's not even sure what it all means.

"So, it was for your friends. That's why you were trying to talk to me."

He sounds like he's got one foot out of this conversation, so Jimin rushes to say, "Not just for that!"

"What else, then?"

That stare, god, Jimin can't take it. He's finding it so hard not to squirm under the intensity of Jungkook's eyes. His drunk brain scrambles.

"I was curious about you. Marching about all tall dark and mysterious."

Jungkook blinks, almost offended. "I'm not mysterious."

"I can count on one hand the things I know about you."

"You didn't ask me."

Like it's that easy. This time, the eye-roll is physical and obvious. "Okay, so let me ask you something now."

"Fine,” Jungkook nods, “but I won’t answer it if I think it’s stupid."

Jimin laughs, practically reeling. "Fair enough." He thinks about how to phrase it. "Did you tell anyone else you're," he hesitates, but Jungkook said it, so maybe it's okay? "autistic? From the studio, I mean?"

A shake of the head. "I don't tell everyone I meet. I don't think it's most people's business, frankly."

"So… why did you tell me?"

A long moment passes, and Jimin lets it.

"Sometimes it helps avoid misunderstandings," he says finally, measured. "People think I'm rude otherwise. You thought it too, didn't you? I don't mean to be."

A little something settles in Jimin's head—he was right about Jungkook not being an asshole. All those stares, all those silences, it wasn't Jungkook just wishing to be rid of him.

Should he thank Jungkook for telling him? Jimin remembers coming out to people and hearing that thank you for sharing and how out of place and small it felt. Is this even like that? Shit, this conversation is running away from him.

His knowledge about autism is practically non-existent. He thinks it involves socialisation issues, or was it speech issues..? He doesn't remember. All he knows is Jungkook is definitely not what one would think when hearing the word autistic.

Best say things as they are, isn't that what Jungkook said?

"Jungkook-ssi, I don't really know what to say." He twirls his beer can just for something to do with his hands. “I have to admit, I don't really know what it means. Or what it changes."

Jungkook shrugs. "It doesn't have to change anything. You just know something about me you didn't know before."

Now that's something.

"Oh, but Jungkook-ssi, that changes everything." There's a faint smile on Jungkook's lips, matching the delighted one on Jimin's face. "That means you're starting to let me in."

The drinking and dancing and festivities go on around them, but Jimin and Jungkook sit down, and for the first time, talk.

Chapter Text

park

Jimin's had an interesting start to the year.

If you'd told him a few weeks ago he'd be spending most of his lunch breaks—breaks, plural!— with Jeon Jungkook, he would have laughed in your face, and yet, here he is: in the small park Jungkook loves to disappear to during lunch breaks to avoid the restaurant rush. It's small, sure, but it's pretty and practically empty, a ten minute walk from the studio.

He hasn't told the girls. He wonders if he should, sometimes, but decides against it. They've moved on to the next topic du jour, so it's no use dredging the Jungkook mission back up—especially when Jungkook has made it clear that getting to know them is not a priority.

"So you never go to restaurants?"

"I do sometimes. For dinner, mostly. But in the middle of the workday…when it's really busy, I just get stressed thinking about how long it will take, and if I'll be late for work. Plus the noise is deafening in crowded indoor spaces. I don't find it restful."

Jimin hums. "I never notice any of that. I kind of like the hustle and bustle."

"This must be boring you, then."

Jimin shakes his head. "No way. There's dogs here. Plus, that's one more thing I know about you now," he tells Jungkook teasingly. "Likes to eat lunch outdoors. Adding it to my mental Jungkook list."

Jungkook looks at him like he's weird. His skin is glowing golden in the sun. "Why do you have a mental Jungkook list?"

"If we're going to be friends, I need to know things about you! So far, there's…" he pretends to count on his fingers, "two things on the list. So it needs some work."

Jungkook clears his throat, picking at his sandwich. There's a fleck of green on his forearm from spending the morning painting. "I like movies. That's another thing about me. I have an, um, monthly pass. I go to the movies twice a week, at least."

One more finger goes up. "Three things. I'm dizzy."

Jungkook's eyes shine with mirth. "Now you."

"Me? I'm an open book." He brings his water to his lips, winning himself some time. Really, he's not very interesting. "I like cheese?"

"Oh, I knew that. You talk about cheese all the time. That doesn't count."

He snorts. "Yah, this kid… fine, you want something that counts? I've been single my entire adult life."

"Serial dater?"

"Nah, just..." He shrugs. "I don't know. Keeping people around is difficult."

"But you like people."

Jimin laughs, surprised. "Yeah, I do. But it's not as simple as that."

Jungkook nods, taking it in.

"What else? We need three things to make it even. Something you like," he prompts. "An interest."

Jimin considers it. Finally, he comes up with, "True crime podcasts are my guilty pleasure."

"Mm!" His mouth is full, so it takes him a second to complete, "I don't think there is such a thing."

"I assure you there's too many true crime podcasts for one human lifetime."

"No," Jungkook smiles, and oh, it feels like a victory, "guilty pleasures. A pleasure should never be guilty. Feeling that way about anything that makes us feel good is stupid. We should be joyful about the things we like, no matter what others think!"

Suddenly, he's lit up with excitement, hands gesturing in animated joy. Jimin can't believe this is the same buttoned up guy who barely looks people in the eye.

He looks terribly pretty.

"Because at the end of the day, we really—um." Jungkook catches himself, deflating. "Sorry. You don't care."

"Says who?"

"I know I talk too much sometimes."

Hilarious. "That has not been my experience."

"I do," Jungkook says. "When it's about the things I like, I can't shut up."

Jimin readjusts his scarf around his neck, getting comfortable. "Prove it, then. Have you watched anything cool recently?"

Jungkook has, and he tells Jimin all about it. Their lunch break bleeds into the afternoon, but neither of them notice.

chat: jungkook (studio)

JK: can you send me the link?

JM: of what?

JK: the podcast you were talking about
JK: i'll listen to it tonight

JM: [link]
JM: That's my favourite one
JM: The episode on the school gave me chills
JM: Don't feel like you have to though!

JK: I need something to listen to when I walk bam
JK: [image]

JM: YOU HAVE A DOG????
JM: when can i meet him?

JK: he's at my brother's half the time

JM: i can come whenever
JM: i can visit you and bring him treats

JK: it's my house, but he gets the treats?

JM: I'll bring you treats too
JM: whatever you like
JM: what do you like?

JK: it's not happening

JM: not now, but when it does
JM: what treat should I bring

JK: just bring yourself
JK: have to go he's barking for me bye

JM: see you at work, jungkook-ssi :)

balcony

Jungkook's studio has a little balcony attached. It's tiny; barely fits two people and the abundance of buckets Jungkook keeps out there, so it's a tight squeeze.

Really, Jimin could have just sent him this video in their —now quite active— chat, but he was a bit bored and uninspired today, so he rushed down to show Jungkook in person with the urgency of the idle.

"You could," Jimin insists, as Jungkook shakes his head vigorously. He's kneeling down, breaking pieces of apparently imperfect pottery into little chunks to reuse.

"I could not. I am not an influencer, I just make pottery!"

"So does this guy!" Jimin brandishes his phone again, still open on the video of a guy with toned arms spinning on his wheel. Jungkook's arms are just as big. He'd eat this guy for breakfast. "Honestly, Jungkook-ssi, you could do this easy. You'd go viral immediately."

"I don't do well on video. I'd get anxious, being filmed."

"Whatever," Jimin leans into the door, "you wouldn't even have to do it right. This guy's just hot and he's got all these views."

"What's the point if I'm not doing it—" Jungkook scrunches his nose. "You think he's hot?"

"Uh, yeah. Look at him."

Jungkook stands to do just that. He leans close to Jimin, focused, and there's that fresh, soft smell he has filling Jimin's lungs. "What about him?"

"I don't know." Have they ever stood so close before? "The vibes. He has hot vibes."

That seems to frustrate Jungkook. That's another thing on his mental Jungkook list: he hates a vaguely answered question. Jimin has also learned that frustration, like so many other things, looks incredibly cute on him.

He crouches back down, sullenly saying, "Makes no sense."

"What can I say? He has hot vibes. Just like you have keep out vibes."

Jungkook stills. "Did someone say that about me? Or is that what you think?"

Shit, he said that without thinking. "Um. Both."

Visibly lower now, Jungkook nods. "Right." The bowl in his hands breaks in two with a clack. "I guess I do."

"I don't think you do now," Jimin tries to reassure him. He really shouldn't have said that. "But you can seem a bit… unapproachable. I invited you to hang out three times and you didn't even react."

"No, you didn't."

"I did."

Jungkook turns to him, insisting,"You didn't. You invited me to lunch with everyone. Once. One time."

"Yes, and then I tried to get you to go out with me for dinner, when we were in the studio late, remember?"

"No, you didn't."

"Yes, I did! I was going on about how hungry I was and everything."

"But you didn't ask me to go out! You just said you wanted to eat cheese!"

"It was implied."

"What was the third time?"

"When I asked you to bring me coffee."

He looks so confused now. "But that—I did. I brought it."

"Yeah, and I wanted you to stay and drink it with me."

"Well, then why—" He drops from his squat to sit on the floor, frustrated. "Why didn't you just say that?"

"I was being obvious!" Jimin insists. "I didn't think I had to!"

"Well, I don't get that kind of stuff. And if I do, I second-guess myself so much I talk myself out of it." Another wonky bowl goes crack then into the bucket. "You have to tell me things, Jimin-ssi. I can't guess what's hiding behind your words, and try to imagine this and that, I… I spent most of my life doing that, and it's exhausting. Next time you want to do something, just say that."

Okay, Jimin can work with that. "Direct."

"Direct."

"Got it." He smiles. "Call me hyung."

Jungkook's mouth hangs open like a cute little fish. "Huh?"

"Call. Me. Hyung. Direct, right?"

Jungkook shrinks in on himself a little, though it seems to be out of shyness more than anything. "Okay."

"And since you rejected me accidentally all those times, let's make up for it. Let's do something soon."

"Like what?"

Jimin shrugs. "Cinema? I haven't been in a while. I'm sure an expert like you can show me a good time."

"I have been meaning to go watch this one movie, but it's three hours long."

Jimin laughs. "Wow. Full cinema immersion. Okay! Let's go. You'll buy me popcorn though, right?"

Jungkook looks up through his lashes. "I thought you said you were the hyung."

By the time Jimin's done with his teasing and headed back up to work, they have a solid plan, and Jungkook has called him hyung twice.

studio girlz (+ jimin <3)

C: jimin-aaaaaaaah
C: are you coming tonight?

JM: what's tonight?

J: club, baby
J: proper party. i'm planning to see sunrise

JM: oh! i forgot!
JM: i was so busy with everything

L: yeah, we haven't seen you at all lately
L: you haven't really been around

JM: work is nuts

L: just work?

J: when work is nuts, that's when you should go out!
J: blowing off steam is important
J: listen to noona

JM: haha okay okay
JM: i'm done with it anyway, sending it off now
JM: so yes, I'll come

C: YAYYY
C: way to go jimin-ah!!!

L: see you thereee

J: SUNRISE CLUB

restaurant

In retrospect, the all-nighter was a bad, bad idea.

Jimin's already been completely overdoing it, recently. Working late nights at the studio, not eating properly, sleeping little and badly—the club really was the cherry on the cake.

It was perfect, as far as nights out go. Laughter, dancing, drinking; riding a wave of adrenaline that comes with getting ahead of a deadline, the coming pay-day pushing him to one more drink, one more, one more, until the sun was up and the streets were empty.

And now he’s suffering the consequences.

On day one, he stays in bed. On day two, he calls the doctor. On day three, he starts to worry about the next deadline.

He can't really afford to stay home this much. Business is based on commissions, and commissions are based on visibility—he needs to be putting more things out there, getting more eyes on his work. Three days in bed is a luxury, and one he can't really afford.

The house is a mess, too. Weeks of little things building up to absolute chaos. Not that he can do anything about it right now other than let it bother him.

On day four, his head clears enough to remember to charge his phone. Head half under the covers, he checks the chat for all the messages he’s missed.

Turns out, there's not that many.

The studio group chat has been active as ever—everyone complained of hungovers the day after, but conversation moved on quickly after that. There's messages from Jooyeon and from Chohui, so Jimin opens them, ready to reassure them, only to find they are about something completely unrelated to his absence.

Jungkook texted too. On day two.

hyung, are you taking a day off?
congrats on submitting on time!! [emoji]
you should definitely rest well, you've been working hard

And today,

did you come in today?
I'll be at the park for lunch if you want to join me

Jimin checks the clock. If he leaves now, he can make it to the park in time for lunch.

Bam sees Jimin before Jungkook does.

A loud happy bark rings through the park, and then Jimin's being tackled by a giant puppy. Thank god Jimin's feeling a bit steadier on his feet today. "Hi!" He kneels down to scratch Bam's head and gets happy greeting licks for his troubles. “Hi, baby!”

"Hyung!"

A smile. Hearing Jungkook call him hyung while he still addresses everyone else at work formally won't lose its kick anytime soon.

Jungkook jogs in their direction, reprimanding Bam for rushing away from him like that before he turns his pretty face to Jimin. "Hi."

"I didn't know you bring him to work."

"My brother couldn't keep him today and the daycare was closed. Where have you been? I wondered where you were! I asked one of the girls, but she didn't know. Said you were probably taking some time off."

"No, no," Jimin waves it away, "just… in bed with a fever."

Jungkook's eyes widen. "For four days?"

A nod. He pulls his beanie further down. "Just the crazy push catching up with me."

"Oh," Jungkook says, sympathetic. "That's too bad. I could have brought you something."

"Like what?"

"Like, to eat. I make a mean broth."

That makes Jimin laugh. It leads into a cough, so Jungkook says, "Sounds like you could still use it. Should we go?"

"Where?"

"For lunch. Inside. It's freezing today, you shouldn't be outside in your condition."

Jimin laughs. "It's okay! My mom always said some fresh air can only do you good."

Just to spite him, his body throws another coughing fit, enough for his eyes to water.

"No, we should go. There's a restaurant close by that makes soup, right? You told me about it once."

"It's really crowded, though. I'm really fine, Jungkook-ah. I'm not even hungry."

"But you should eat." He looks offended on Jimin's behalf. "Especially if you've had no appetite these past few days. We're going. Let's go."

Bam stomps in place, as if to highlight Jungkook's words.

"But—"

Jungkook does not take no for an answer.

Twenty minutes later, a steaming bowl of goodness is sitting in front of Jimin and he attacks it with no shame, glad for something warm and comforting. Fuck, it brings his body back to life from the inside out.

Jungkook watches him with his chin leaned on his hand, the other petting Bam to keep him calm in the noisy, bustling restaurant. "Must have been bad if you were out of commission for four days.”

Jimin nods wipes his mouth with the napkin. "It was intense. Had to get out to go the pharmacy at some point and I thought I’d pass out in the street.”

He intends for it to be funny, but Jungkook does not laugh.

"Your friends didn't come to help?"

"You know how busy everyone is at the studio."

Jungkook doesn't seem happy with that response. His jaw tightens. "If your friend needs you, you find time."

"They didn't know," Jimin tries to defend. "And anyway, even if anyone had come over, I would have just been unconscious and feverish in bed. What's the use?"

Maybe it's a bit more for his own benefit than Jungkook's, and anyway, Jungkook doesn't look convinced.

"Do you need something from the pharmacy now? I can drop it off when I'm leaving work. Or groceries? Bet your fridge is empty, right?"

Jimin shakes his head. "I won't send you to buy me groceries, don't be silly."

"Why? I can do it. I'll drive you back and then I'll go."

"No, no, no, don't worry. I can go back myself." He wants to ruffle Jungkook's hair, he's being so cute and considerate. "Forget about me now, tell me how you've been. Slower than normal, is it?"

He blinks. "No, why?"

"For you to notice I've been gone, I imagine there wasn't much to do."

"Of course I noticed. What? Obviously." He squirms in his seat, putting his hand around the mug of tea he ordered since he'd already had his lunch. "You disappear for three days and I wouldn't notice? No work, no text, nothing?"

Jimin's face is heating up. This version of Jungkook, more open, more talkative, more everything, is still taking him by surprise. "What, missed me that much?"

Jungkook looks at him, big pretty eyes all serious. "Yeah."

What to say to that, now?

"Oh." Jimin realises he's smiling. He doesn't know when it happened. "Hah. Okay. Then I promise I'll come bug you as soon as I can."

"You're not—" Jungkook leans forward. "Are you being serious? You know you don't bug me, right? If you were bugging me, I wouldn't open the door. I wouldn't let you come in. I would tell you to leave me alone."

"What, really? You'd tell someone that to their face?"

Jungkook shrugs. "I've done it before. Like with Nahyun."

Jimin's eyes widen. "You told her to fuck off to her face?"

Entirely unrepentant, Jungkook says, "She wouldn't stop interrupting my work with all kinds of excuses. It was really annoying. So I told her so."

"Jungkook-ah," Jimin reaches out, his hands gripping Jungkook's. Food and gossip and Jungkook, what else does he need to heal, body and soul? "Tell me everything."

chat: jungkook (studio)

JM: i just realised jungkook-ah
JM: the cinema
JM: i missed our movie date!
JM: i'm so sorry!!

JK: you were in bed with fever hyung
JK: it's fine

JM: still! i completely forgot
JM: i should have told you
JM: it totally slipped my mind
JM: did you go?

JK: no
JK: we'd said we'd go together

JM: okay, then should we do it? this weekend, plan's back on?

JK: okay :)

cinema

The cinema is in the heart of the city, big and fancy, in the middle of a disgustingly crowded shopping mall. Even though it's a late evening screening, it's all swimming with people coming in and out of the surrounding restaurants. Even Jimin notices the buzzing noise of crowds, here—plus, he's been run into by fighting families and couples with massive shopping bags more times than he cares to mention.

None of that is enough to ruin his mood, though—this is the first time him and Jungkook are meeting outside the studio. It's new and exciting, so nothing can spoil Jimin's fun.

"You said it's science fiction, right?"

"Hm." Jungkook seems distracted. He's got his head down, looking at the ground, but he keeps darting looks up every few seconds, like he can't help himself. Jimin notices him picking at his nails under his long sleeves. "Great reviews."

"You like science fiction movies? I don't really know anything about them."

"I do, yeah."

Jimin's next few questions are similarly brushed off, to the point where he starts to think Jungkook might be regretting this. Did he force this on Jungkook, somehow? Was this a mistake?

To make things even more awkward, the elevator is empty when they step into it. Just Jungkook, Jimin, and the charged silence.

Maybe Jimin shouldn't have pushed. Maybe this was a bit too much. Fuck, will all their steps forward be erased, just like that?

Somewhere between the second and third floor, the lights flicker. The elevator makes a horrible, loud, sick clunk before stopping in place, just like that.

After a second of blind panic, Jimin wills himself to calm down.

They don't seem to be falling, so there's no real cause for concern—they're just stopped between two floors. This happened to him a lot in his first apartment, in an old, cheap neighbourhood. The elevator was a metal coffin waiting to happen. This one is well maintained, in good condition—they're safe.

He presses the emergency button and it lights up, so that's a good sign. One more press of the call button. Jimin waits for someone to come on the line.

No one does, but an automated voice tells him that building security has been notified, so at least there's that.

"That's that, then," he says with a shrug. "Guess we just get comfortable, huh?"

He turns around to find Jungkook has leaned back against the wall, eyes far away. Jimin says his name to no effect, so he steps forward in worry.

"Hey." He touches Jungkook gently on the arm and Jungkook blinks, like he's trying to concentrate. "Jungkook-ah. Are you okay?"

"Fine, yeah, yeah." He's brought his finger to his lips, biting it repeatedly. "Um. You said? Sorry. You said."

"I said we should get comfortable."

A nod.

Jimin can't really tell in the weird lighting, but he thinks Jungkook's gone a bit pale. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"I just don't like small spaces." He laughs, hollow. "At all. I'm. Yeah. I want to..." His face twitches, some emotion trying and failing to fight its way up. "Get out."

"We will. We just have to wait."

"How long?" He asks, and when Jimin just shrugs in answer, he mutters again. "Okay," like that's all he can say, "okay, okay." He's stopped looking up now, pressing himself even further back into the wall, his legs going tight as bowstrings.

"Maybe we should call the front desk, too, just to speed things up." He checks his phone—no bars. "Ah, I don't have signal. Do you?" No answer. Like he didn't hear him. He goes to touch Jungkook's hand. "Do you—"

A flinch.

Jimin swallows down the hurt at the response. Jungkook doesn't need a fight right now, clearly.

But what the hell does he need?

"Jungkook-ah."

A vague shake of the head.

Fine. No talking. He'll give him some time, since he can't really give him any space.

He sits on the floor, trying to keep as far from Jungkook as he can. Let him be, he tells himself.

They just sit like this, in silence, waiting. Jimin watches as Jungkook closes his eyes, trying to calm himself down. It doesn't seem to be working, especially since the minutes pass with no news of anyone having noticed the issue.

After a minute, Jungkook sits on the opposite side of the elevator, all curled into himself. He hides his head in his arms and keeps trying the deep breaths to no avail.

Jimin can't help himself, then.

"This used to happen all the time in my old apartment," he says, tone even, voice soothing. "I panicked at first too. The first time, I think I actually broke down in tears, you know? I was that scared. But it happened again and again, so I had no choice but to get used to it. To learn to calm myself down."

"I would do this breathing exercise my mom taught me," he continues, though Jungkook doesn’t react other than looking vaguely in his direction. "I'd get anxiety attacks as a kid. School was hard, and the pressure got to me… I'll tell you another time." He smiles. Jungkook watches his mouth. "It's called box breathing. I can talk you through it, if you want? I’d have to come sit next to you."

It takes a second, but Jungkook nods.

It’s impossible not to notice how cramped things get when he sits by Jungkook. They’re pressed together, one shoulder to Jungkook’s and one to the elevator wall.

Jimin puts his hand on his own thigh, palm-up, an invitation. He sees Jungkook see it. He sees him think. He hears his heavy breathing.

Jimin wiggles his fingers.

Jungkook takes his hand.

"Good. Okay, so, here’s how it will go. I'll squeeze your hand and count to four. You just breathe in. That’s all you have to do." One, two, three, four. "Good." A squeeze. "Hold it for one, two, three, four." A squeeze. "Breathe out." One, two, three, four. "Good. Rest, two, three, four." A squeeze. "Again."

They go through the cycle a couple more times. Jungkook follows him with his eyes at first, but then closes them and lets their joined hands and Jimin's voice lead him through it.

It’s meditative, almost. Even being the one leading, Jimin feels himself calm down. He keeps a steady hold of Jungkook’s hand, warm and tight around his.

When Jungkook can speak again, the first thing he says is "S-sorry, I'm sorry—"

“What for, hm?” A squeeze. Somewhere along the line, their fingers have intertwined. "Everything's fine."

"How long h-have we..?"

"Don't really know," Jimin admits honestly. He leans into Jungkook a little, chasing the pressure. "But I'm sure they've called someone. Any minute now, they'll get us out."

"We'll miss the movie though," Jungkook says, voice hoarse, cheeks a bit streaked with some distressed tears. He leans his shoulder against Jimin's. "Won't we."

"Probably. But hey, if you want, you can come to mine. We can watch one there. Your choice."

A shaky exhale. "I don't…"

"Or yours, if you prefer." He brings Jungkook's hand into his lap, cradling it carefully. "Would that be better?"

"I…" With a frustrated huff, Jungkook pulls his hand away. "Sorry, let me just—"

He crawls to his bag to get something before settling back down next to Jimin. Even closer, it feels like, Jungkook practically half in his lap.

The object he's gotten out of his bag is small. Two little smooth bars that he starts rolling around one another, again and again, in a constant motion.

"Stim toy," he explains, noticing Jimin's curious look. He tucks a strand of hair behind his ear. "It helps. So, um, I don't know if I can still do something after this."

"That's okay," Jimin assures. "Up to you."

He watches Jungkook play with the thing for a while as silence settles between them. His thoughts are starting to melt away from him. Jungkook's hair keeps slipping away, and he keeps tucking it back, and round and round itself the little toy goes.

"Can I ask, when did you…" Jimin brings his knees into his chest. "When did you know."

"The diagnosis, uou mean? Only last year," Jungkook says, words a little slurred and slow. This all seems to be catching up with him, too. "Though really, looking back, it was so obvious. Even as a kid.” A long, tired sigh. “I have this memory," he brings his hands up like he can see it in a little globe in front of his face, "this event. A church thing, I think? gathering. All my cousins were there. So many kids my age, boys, playing football together, and I just wanted to stay in the corner of the yard, playing with mud."

Jimin smiles, endeared. Little Jungkookie, dirty up to his elbows with dirt. "And now you've made a career out of it."

Jungkook's eyes twinkle prettily and a smile almost graces his face. "Right?" He becomes serious again. "It's still new, though. I'm still not… I'm still figuring myself out. What ticks me off. Barely just started making accommodations for myself," he lifts up the stim toy in indication, "or understanding it all. Like the, um." He gestures over his shoulder. "The shutdown just now."

A shutdown, Jimin notes mentally. "Right."

"I can kind of tell now when it’s coming, but not always."

"So you know what brought it on?"

Jungkook nods. "This whole week has been weird. I've messed up a bit at work because I wasn't—I was distracted and clumsy, so I've fallen behind schedule, and..." He blinks hard. "And then we come here, late. I'm usually at home at this time, most days. So that's already out of the ordinary, right? And this place is all full of people with that horrible perfume smell everywhere. Nauseating. And I was—um." He rolls his eyes at himself, but pushes through. "I was nervous."

"For the movie?"

"For going out. Together. Because it's new and because today was stressful and different and I was scared that exactly this," he waves his hand in an encompassing gesture, "was going to happen, and it did."

"The elevator breaking down?"

He acknowledges Jimin's playing dumb with a weak elbow nudge, and Jimin smiles.

"Do you ever… " He looks at Jimin. "Do you ever feel this way?"

"I feel nervous, if that's what you mean."

"No," Jungkook shakes his head, "no, no, it’s like… I'm constantly walking on a tight-rope. Monitoring myself like crazy, my moods, my body, my thoughts… monitoring other people to make sure I'm not being weird. Noticing when they think I am, and trying to fix it. This whole feedback loop of shit. Ceaseless."

Jimin’s heart aches for him. That sounds exhausting. “That’s every day?”

“Every day. Always. I'm still coming to terms with a lot of it. My limits, you know?" He slumps, a little defeated. He crosses his arms over his chest, curling into himself, into that uncomfortable corner of the elevator. "Like, I'm never… I'm never going to be like you. Social like you."

"Why do you have to be?"

"Cause it's what people want. It's what people like." He looks sad. "But that's not me. I'm always gonna be weird and off-putting, at least at first. And most people won't look further than that impression."

Jimin thinks of half the people at the studio that wrote Jungkook off as rude, or steered clear of him without exactly knowing why.

Looking at Jungkook now, Jimin sees someone entirely different. That mysterious, distant guy cracked open into someone shy, but willing. The oversized hoodies are just comfort, the all black ease of choice. Thinking about it, every little habit of Jungkook's that Jimin thoughtlessly classed as rude before seems to just be his way of surviving in this world, alone.

Well, he's not alone anymore.

He reaches out to tuck that stubborn loose strand back into place.

"Some of us will." His thumb brushes over Jungkook's cheekbone for a second before he pulls away in fear of pushing too much again. "The smarter ones. And you know…" Jimin sighs, dropping his head back against the wall. "Being social is one thing, but how much is it worth, at the end of the day? I mean… sure, I can talk to people. I can make a good impression, I can joke around. King of small talk. I'll gossip all day long. People like it, and so do I, and they like me, yeah, but… " He pouts. "When I need someone, none of those people are really gonna be there."

Jungkook frowns. "You think?"

"I know."

"That's unacceptable," Jungkook declares, and it makes Jimin laugh. "I'm serious! Hyung, that's not me. Don't count me in with those people."

"Okay, okay. None of those people, except for one." Guess he didn't need to worry about their losing their progress, afterall. "I guess we're both each other's exceptions."

Jungkook goes all soft and shy, lashes fluttering—but then he leans his head against the wall too, looking at Jimin openly, unabashedly.

Jimin turns to face him. His knees land in Jungkook's lap. Teasing, he says, "Aren't you supposed to be bad with eye contact?"

Something's dancing in Jungkook's eyes, a thought he's not vocalising yet. "I can look away, if you want."

That's the last thing Jimin wants.

chat: jungkook 

JM: did you make it home safe?

JK: [image]

JM: don't show the baby off so much if you won't let me meet him :(
lM: look how cute he is all cuddled up on your chest
JM: does he know how big he is?
JM: when can i see him again?

JK: don't be impatient, hyung

JM: fine >:(
JM: for a cute face like that I can be good

JK: he doesn't know how big he is, no
JK: he thinks he's a puppy

JM: it's crazy but you got the same eyes
JM: puppy eyes

JK: of course!!! he's my son

JM: oh, that reminds me
JM: [image] here's your other son

JK: you always put him on your pillow?

JM: he's my dream catcher
JM: stays next to me all night

JK: i can make you one without a wonky eye

JM: that won't work
JM: i love him just as he is
JM: thanks for driving me home

JK: thank you too

JM: for driving you home ? :)

JK: you know what I mean

JM: let's go out again soon, jungkook-ah

JK: yes
JK: soon

JM: this weekend?

JK: i was going to meet namjoon-hyung this weekend

JM: then let's all go!

the street

Jimin's world is turning a little, but that's alright, because Jungkook's got him.

He wasn't going to drink this much tonight. He really, really wasn't, but they were having so much fun at karaoke it was easy to just down another beer, and then one more, and then one more, and so now here he is, unable to walk straight.

It was important, too, because Jungkook introduced him to one of his oldest friends tonight. His name is escaping Jimin right now, but it will come back to him when he's sobered up some, he's sure.

"But you left the bike there," Jimin says with a hiccup as they stumble out of the car. It speeds away immediately. "You should have just—just gotten me a taxi."

"And tipped the driver extra to bring you up?" Jungkook says with an amused huff. He puts an arm around Jimin's waist. "It's okay, hyung. I'll go pick it up tomorrow."

"It'll—it'll mess up your schedule." They talked about the importance of routine. Jungkook sounded all at once firm and apologetic, as strange a mix as any within him. Jimin's learned to expect surprise from him at every turn, somehow.

"I'll be fine. Let's get you inside, come on."

What was his code, again? 1…3…

It takes several tries. When it clicks open, Jimin squeals. "Yes!" He grabs Jungkook's hand in celebration. "Jungkook-ah, we're in."

"We're in."

They enter the elevator. He sees Jungkook worry in the mirror, biting his lip. Maybe he's remembering the last time they were stuck together. Jimin wraps Jungkook's arms around his own waist.

"Don't worry," he tells him. He turns his head, his nose brushing against Jungkook's jaw. "It's only two floors."

The arms around his waist tighten. "I know."

The second code comes a bit easier—it clicks open on the first try.

"Tonight was fun, right?" He leans into Jungkook's shoulder. "Your friend was nice."

"It was, and he is." Jungkook gently ushers him inside. "He liked you too. He told me."

Hell yes. Mission accomplished. Jimin was worried about this friend, this hyung, being overprotective, or hostile. Jungkook had told him himself he doesn't make friends easily, so this was special.

"D-did he?" Jimin laughs, relieved. "Good."

"Did you like him?"

Jimin considers this. He brings Jungkook's hands fully around his waist, getting cosy in his arms. "Sure! Handsome. I bet people tell him all the time."

"They do."

Jungkook's sad little voice perplexes Jimin. He turns in Jungkook's embrace enough to see his face. "What?" He grabs his cheeks in one hand, squeezing. "Why the long face?"

"Nothing." He heads to the kitchen. Jimin gravitates towards him, following mindlessly, and he ends up with a glass of water in his hands. "Are you going to ask for his number?"

Jimin frowns halfway through his water. "Who?"

"My—Namjoonie-hyung. My friend."

He wipes his mouth. "Why?"

"Because—you said he's handsome. And nice. And you like him."

"So?" He shrugs. His head turns. Fuck, he shouldn't have drunk this much. "That's true of a lot of people."

"You won't go out with him?"

"Don't be ridiculous, I—oh!" He trips and Jungkook catches him, hands framing his waist. Jimin's own land on his shoulders. When he looks at his face, it's all wide-eyes and expectation. "I won't."

"Promise?"

Jimin chuckles, wrapping his arms around Jungkook's neck and leaning into him some more. Surely, he's drunk enough to get away with it. "Why so invested, hm? Am I not good enough for your hyung or he not good enough for me?"

Jungkook ducks his head down. "You should wash up."

"Mm," Jimin groans in protest, slumping onto Jungkook. "My legs don't work. Can't."

"From one to ten, how much do you want to throw up right now?"

"Like, two—oh!" He's swept up into Jungkook's arms, half a bridal carry and half messy cling. Jimin laughs, holding on awkwardly. "Are you crazy!"

Jungkook chuckles too, all worry forgotten.

on jungkook's bike

Jimin clings to Jungkook's shoulders, adrenaline rushing through him.

The bike roars between his legs, powerful and totally under Jungkook's control. He said he'd go slow for Jimin, but honestly, Jimin just wants him to go faster and faster now.

Jungkook's driven him home a few times, now. Jimin loves the bike, loves the speed, loves getting to keep his arms around Jungkook and smell the leather of his jacket.

They've been spending more and more time together lately. At least once a day, they'll take a coffee break together. Jimin will knock on Jungkook's door with two steaming mugs, coaxing him out of his usual crouched position.

Sometimes he can't leave his work in the middle, so Jimin sits on the windowsill and watches him. He's the picture of grace and precision over his wheel, spinning away at some pretty thing. Hair always a little messy, caught in some haphazard bun. Eyes lazer-focused on his work, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. His arms, toned and gorgeous, leading down into strong capable hands, molding clay into perfection. He'll grumble about it sometimes, when it's less than immaculate, and slice it back into nothingness.

It's the two places Jungkook seems the most himself—over his wheel and driving his bike. Jimin's still learning who that self is, but he knows one thing already: he really, really likes what he's finding out.

"Can't believe it's finally the weekend," he says when they arrive, taking the helmet off. He drops his forehead on Jungkook's back, nuzzling. "I thought this week would never end. I close my eyes and see address stickers and envelopes."

Jungkook takes Jimin's helmet away from his hands, waiting patiently for Jimin to unstraddle the motorbike. He's not ready to get off and go home yet, though, so Jimin wraps his arms around his waist, instead.

There's been an escalation, when it comes to touch, from both of them. These days, even at the studio, Jungkook is simply glued to Jimin's side. Usually an arm around him, a chin on his shoulder, legs linked together under a table.

The girls balk, at first. There's some curious texts, and some gossip he's not privy to, because they just don't get it—how could he and Jungkook have gotten this close? Except for Leesoo—more than once, Jimin's caught her staring at them with a knowing look. He suspects the others are simply too straight to see what's right under their noses.

If they could see them now, they'd lose their minds.

"What are your weekend plans?"

"Same as every weekend." He leans onto the helmet, nonchalantly gorgeous. "Gym, cinema, lunch with Namjoon-hyung on sunday."

"Mm."

"What?"

"What?"

"You're pouting. Why are you pouting?"

"I wasn't." He puts his chin on Jungkook's shoulder. "Just saying."

Jungkook twists around to catch his eye. When their noses brush, instead of jerking away, they both smile.

"Saying what?"

"I hardly see you during the weekends, that's all. Or Bamie. I'm getting used to a certain amount of cute in my life, and I haven't fulfilled the quota this week." He pats Jungkook's stomach. "So come up."

"What, now? Bamie's not even here."

"You're just as cute," Jimin says, enjoying it thoroughly when Jungkook ducks his head shyly. "So you'll do."

"You said you were tired, though." Jungkook's gloved hand is resting over Jimin's now. "So what would we even do?"

A shrug. "Lie down. Take a nap."

"And you need me there for that?"

"The quota, Jungkook-ssi, think of the quota."

Jungkook laughs, that bright, adorable sound so at odds with his black hardcore biker get-up, and follows Jimin upstairs.

"Wait, so you were serious about the nap?"

Jimin nods, extending the pajamas to Jungkook once more. "I never joke about naps."

The t-shirt is just about his size, though it's bright yellow—Jungkook makes a face when he sees himself in the mirror, and turns to Jimin, who's just about buckled in two in laughter.

"Look at you!" He comes closer, brushing the t-shirt uselessly into place, his palms flying over Jungkook's shoulders. "Beautiful little banana."

Jungkook pouts. "Yellow is not my colour."

"Come hide it under the covers, then."

Jimin is expecting a little protest, maybe. Some resistance. But Jungkook just lies down and brings the blanket to his chin, shivering his way to comfort. Jimin's leaned on his elbow, watching him fondly.

"I like your bed," Jungkook says, eyes closed. "It smells good."

Jimin pulls Jungkook's bangs away from his face, brushing it back gently. "What else do you like?"

"About you?" Jungkook looks up at him, a playful little something on his face.

Jimin's heart picks up, eager. "If you want."

"I like when you bring me coffee in my mug," Jungkook starts. "I like when you ask my opinion on your drawings. I like… I like how you play with Bam." After a second, "I like that you made space for us."

Jimin keeps playing with Jungkook's hair, steady and slow. "Of course I did."

"I like that you looked things up," he continues, "about my diagnosis. Without me even asking. And that you're curious."

Jimin lowers himself down now, eye to eye. "Keep going," he says with a smile. "I like this game."

"I like this tooth," Jungkook says, touching Jimin's upper lip briefly. "The crooked one."

"The weird one."

"The cute one."

"Ah, I see." Jimin can't keep himself from grinning. "And what else?"

"Aren't you being unfair, hyung? Shouldn't we switch now?" He puts himself up on his elbow, mirroring Jimin's previous position. "Here, I'll play with your hair too."

Jimin's stomach swoops. "Only fair, I suppose. Hm… what I like about you…"

"Don't take too long to come up with something or I'll be offended."

Jimin shakes his head. There's no shortage of things he likes about Jungkook.

"I like how you get when you talk about movies. All bright and passionate. I like that." He closes his eyes too, getting comfortable. "I like your cooking. I want you as my personal chef forever. And I like when you laugh sometimes, and you make this face." He imitates the nose scrunch he loves in Jungkook, only for him to do it too. "Just like that," Jimin says, delightedly. "I like how in the zone you get when you're working, just… spinning away like magic. You work magic. And I like your old man taste in music," he concludes with a tease. "I think it goes really well with your sleeve tattoo."

Jungkook is a mess of giggles by now, slumped back down into the bed.

They go on like this, trading teases and likes, until somehow, they tangle together.

Jungkook's chin is tucked in Jimin's neck, his arm over Jimin's waist. The weight of him is like nothing Jimin's ever felt. He never wants to leave this room. Never wants Jungkook to leave his arms.

They were talking about something, but the conversation slowed and slowed until it matched their breaths, lazy and cosy. Jimin's just floating in an ocean of calm.

"Hyung?"

"Hm?"

"Are you ticklish?"

A sleepy smile. "Usually those words are followed by an attack."

"Oh? I won't attack," Jungkook promises. "Are you?"

"I don't really know."

"Really?" He hums. "Then I'll investigate."

His nose brushes against Jimin's throat, the light, subtle touch of a feather, leaving a shiver in its wake.

"Interesting," Jungkook murmurs, low. He does it again, pressing a little harder now. Jimin keeps himself from squirming too much, but when he feels Jungkook's lips touch his skin instead, he can't help it.

Jungkook giggles, scooting up. His head lands next to Jimin's on the pillow.

"You are."

"Happy now?"

"Mm. Happy."

He burrows down into the pillows, eyes closing. Jimin's own are half-lidded, his body liquid. Hearing Jungkook's breaths turn deeper, he drifts off, thinking of lips on skin.

Chapter Text

Jimin's sitting on Jungkook's counter, legs dangling, watching Jungkook do his thing. Cooking is serious business to him, so Jimin had only been allowed to minimally participate. He did a fine—if heavily supervised—job of dicing up some onion, and the rest was left to the professional.

Really, he’s starting to lose count of Jungkook’s talents. Jimin’s only just discovered he can sing, when he started humming as he prepared the sauce. He sings like crazy when he’s alone, apparently, but never felt comfortable doing it at the studio. So singing, drawing, painting, cooking… his Jungkook mental list is filling up nicely.

“And then,” Jungkook says, stirring as he talks, “she demanded I refund her the whole thing!”

“No!”

“Yes!” A bit of sauce flies off the pan as he gestures. He wipes it off the counter with his thumb and sucks it clean. “I said no, but I had a huge panic about it first. I asked hyung—”

“Namjoon-ssi?”

“Namjoon-hyung, yeah, I asked him a million times if he thinks I’m being fair. I thought she was trying to scam me but I was like, paralysed at the idea that she was being honest and I would treat her badly.”

“People like that are usually scammers,” Jimin says, with conviction born out of experience. He’s got his own etsy stories aplenty. “They have a system. Nothing you said could have pleased her. I bet she asked to keep the product, too?”

“Yeah!” He lowers the fire. The smell filling the kitchen is absolutely divine. “And that’s what convinced me, in the end, because what the hell, right? She called it defective. Why did she suddenly want to keep it?”

“Did she leave a bad review? They’re usually serial bad reviewers.”

Jungkook leans back on the counter next to where Jimin is sitting. Hands crossed over his chest, he nods. “Checked her profile. Not a single good review.”

“Bingo.”

“This was a week of my life, though, Jimin-ssi. I was all torn up over it.”

“Shame you didn’t know me then,” Jimin says with a grin. “I would have told you. Saved you some time.”

Jungkook’s smile looks unintentional, and all the sweeter for it. “Shame.”

Jimin nudges Jungkook with his shoulder, pushing him to the side. They both sway, laughing.

There’s a newfound ease between them that Jimin revels in. Especially when they’re here, at Jungkook’s place, it’s like a huge weight is lifted off his shoulders and he can just be a little more painlessly.

Jungkook huffs, shaking his head to get his hair out of his face like a puppy shaking off water. He really is so much like Bam sometimes.

Jimin stands in front of him, pushing it back with both hands. “It's getting so long. Why don’t you tie it up?”

“It gives me headaches.” He pouts. Actually pouts, and a hand comes to rest on Jimin's waist. “But I hate it in my face all the time.”

Settling his arms on Jungkook's shoulders, he asks, “Why don’t you wear a beanie or something?”

“At home? Isn’t that weird?”

Jimin shrugs. “And?”

A light comes into Jungkook’s eyes then. Something shifts, and Jimin feels it in his stomach.

That hand in his waist gives a gentle push, and that's all Jimin needs to find himself chest to chest with Jungkook. Oh, how his heart pounds.

"Hyung," he says, those eyes lit up with purpose, "I really want to kiss you." His free hand comes to grip Jimin's nape, thumb under his jaw. "Can I kiss you?"

There is only one answer Jimin can give.

The kiss tastes of care and eagerness, so utterly Jungkook Jimin's heart leaps.

He leans into Jungkook completely, all his weight resting on him. It's been so long since a kiss made Jimin melt like this.

Peck after peck, things get hazy. At some point Jungkook picks him up, easy and effortless, placing him on the counter. Jimin cradles his pretty face and deepens the kiss, burning for more and more and more. His legs lock behind Jungkook's back. A button gets done away with and Jungkook's placing kisses all down Jimin's neck, breathing him in, and how can Jimin not shiver then?

His mind runs away with him, encouraged by the firm, strong hands on him, by the soft pleased sounds Jungkook makes when their mouths find each other again. He pictures the future, and his heart takes flight.

Jungkook kissing him at the studio, leaving clay smudges on his cheeks; in the kitchen, tasting of coffee; on the rooftop, right where they had their first real conversation, lips slowly traveling down Jimin's neck. Getting caught by colleagues and laughing into each other's shoulders. Getting interrupted by an excitable dog, again and again.

"That's one more for my Jungkook list," he says against Jungkook's mouth when he can find his voice again, "good kisser."

Jungkook laughs, looking up at him, eyes overflowing with wonder.

Jimin feels it too. Wonder that for whatever reason, Jimin insisted past their rocky beginning. Wonder that Jungkook shared a part of himself with him, when he didn't have to. Wonder that the self that Jungkook wears as a shield every day is shed in to the safety of his home, a home Jimin is welcome in.

He's so fucking lucky to know him like this.

"It must be quite long by now," Jungkook says with a smile.

"Not long enough," Jimin says, and kisses him again.