Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Zoey first felt it when she was 18 years old.

It happened after an intense session of demon hunting. They still had a little less than a month before their debut date.

They were in the kitchen, huddled around the island, with their ramen cups. Steam rose from it, freshly made, and they were all sitting quietly with tiny cuts and bruises littered across their skin.

It was a tough hunt with more than a few close calls.

Close calls that could’ve resulted in a trip to the hospital.

Close calls that would’ve disappointed Celine.

Zoey had a frown on her face, eyebrows furrowed, while she glared at her uneaten ramen cup. Her face softened; however, when she looked up and saw Rumi gnawing at her bottom lip.

As their leader, it made sense for Rumi to carry more weight on her shoulders.

Sometimes though, Zoey wished she could do something to take at least some of that burden off, to let her realize that she didn’t have to carry the world on her shoulders alone. To show her that no matter what happened, her and Mira would be there to carry it with her.

Zoey’s lips twisted into a soft smile as she leaned forward and placed her fingers on top of Rumi’s wrist. The touch was gentle, a silent ask for permission to linger.

Rumi looked up slowly, as if unsure, and she held Zoey’s gaze once she met it. Her forehead was creased slightly, a show of the whirlwind of thoughts going on inside her mind. Zoey wanted nothing more than to trace along those lines to soften it.

Then, as if sensing Zoey’s own worry, Rumi smiled. She smiled and turned her hand over gently, intertwining her fingers with Zoey’s.

And, suddenly Zoey’s heart stuttered in her own chest, suddenly her hand feels warmer, suddenly Rumi’s gaze made her feel right, like she’s—

“I swear to god if Celine says something about this hunt I’m going to dye her entire scalp neon green,” Mira clicked her tongue. She then huffed, “No offense Rumi.”

She didn’t sound like she regretted it at all.

Both girls looked at Mira.

Zoey blinked.

Rumi looked startled and confused at the same time.

“What? She looks like she wouldn’t like green.” Mira added.

There was a breath.

Zoey reacted first with an undignified snort, “What—“ She doubled over the table, hands on her stomach as she cackled.

Rumi let out a yelp at the same time before letting out a laugh that was a mix between disbelief and surprise, “Wh— I— No offense taken?” Then her laughter got louder, tears gathering at the corner of her eyes, “Mira where did you—“

Mira said something about having that idea stored in her head for a long time and Rumi responded with comical interest while laughing. Rumi laughed so damn hard that she was red in the face and Mira smirked like she had just won Artist of the Year for making the girls laugh.

Zoey watched the two girls in front of her with a fond smile, chuckling alongside the two, because what Mira said was so out of pocket but so Mira.

Because Mira was exactly that. She was the sun and moon in one — Mira was rough but soft at the same time, she was fierce and brash but only because she yearned to protect, she was impatient because she loved so patiently.

Zoey always thought herself lucky to be part of Mira’s life.

Then, Zoey had thought of another quip to add, had thought of another little jab at Celine, so she parted her lips to say it. Excitement filled her chest as she leaned forward to say—

The words died in her throat before she could say it.

There was a pulse in her chest as she saw Mira and Rumi laugh.

There was a subtle ache in her ribs as she saw the way Mira smiled at Rumi.

It was softer. 

Softer than Mira portrayed herself as. 

Then there were the giggles that escaped Rumi at whatever Mira had said.

It was raw, Rumi’s smile was raw.

Unbound by the tight chains of perfection.

But Zoey merely smiled, too afraid to acknowledge the weight on her chest.

So she did what she always did.

She pushed it away. 

She pushed it away for 5 years.

—

“LET’S GO!!!” Zoey cheered as she climbed on top of their couch, pumping her fists in the air. Her back ached slightly but she really couldn’t care — not when the screen in front of her flashed with #1 Victory Royale!

“Finally,” Mira chuckled, walking into the living room with a steaming mug in her hand. “Took you like, what, 5 matches?” She sat down beside Zoey, leg crossing over the other.

Zoey huffed, plopping down beside Mira hard enough to jostle the taller girl, “You’re just jealous that you’re not in the big leagues like I am.”

Mira nodded, eyebrows furrowed into mock acknowledgement. “Oh yeah, I’m so jealous of you,” she said, “And your victory against children, for sure.”

Zoey gasped, “Excuse you! Fortnite is not just for children you know—“ As if on cue, Rumi walked out of her room with their big blue tiger in tow. Quickly, Zoey pointed to their leader, “—Rumi plays Fortnite, right Ru!”

Rumi raised an eyebrow, an amused expression on her face, “Yeah, sure, maybe not as much as you—“

“Not a good argument when a three year old could play better than her.”

Stunned silence followed as soon as Mira said it and usually Zoey would be quick to defend Rumi. She was always ready to stand up for her Rumi, but even she was absolutely gobsmacked by that.

Mira’s jab was swift and deadly, like she just swung her Gok-do.

Zoey sucked in a breath, eyes squeezing shut.

“You little— I’d like to see you play!” Rumi sputtered, forgoing whatever she had planned and practically charging towards where the taller girl sat. “And seriously?! You’re acting like you can play better than me when you haven’t even tried it!”

Mira just finished taking a sip from her mug when she smirked up at Rumi and in that infuriatingly smug smile said, “Oh yeah?”  

Zoey’s eyes squinted, the next defense dying on her lips. She merely shifted on the couch, away from Mira, and gently put the controller down.

Rumi’s eye twitched and, just as Zoey predicted, she practically vaulted over the couch and landed right beside Mira. She swiped the controller from the glass table and clutched it in her hand like a lifeline.

With a huff, Rumi narrowed her eyes at Mira, “Zoey.”

“On it!” Zoey leapt off the couch and grabbed the other controller from under their large tv, snickering to herself.

Rumi pointed to the tv as she glared at Mira, though it looked more adorable than it did intimidating, “Play.”

Mira snorted, “I don’t think it’s fair when I haven’t practiced—“

Rumi smirked, “So you’re saying you can’t beat someone you said was worse than a three year old?” She leaned forward, as if challenging the taller girl, “You saying you’re scared, Mira?”

See, out of the three of them Mira was usually the best at rage-baiting them. Somehow she mastered the art of it and used it whenever she possibly could. So one would think that someone who was practically an expert at that would be able to resist when her tactics are used on her but nope. Nope, not at all.

While Mira mastered the art of annoying Rumi, Rumi practically perfected the art of pushing Mira’s competitive buttons.

It probably helped that Rumi was just as competitive.

Mira held Rumi’s gaze, jaw ticking slightly when their leader’s smirk seemed to grow.

Without any fuss, Mira put her mug aside and stretched her hand out to Zoey’s direction, “You’re on.”

Zoey bit her lip, trying to hold back a smile, as she passed the controller to Mira. The latter caught it without even looking and turned her body to face the tv — Rumi following suit.

Both girls looked at her, nodding, and said at the same time, “We’re ready.”

Zoey swallowed a smile at the silly expressions on their face, at the cute determination wrinkling their foreheads, and nodded with the same conviction the other two had. She pressed a few buttons on Rumi’s controller, tweaking it slightly.

“Split screen might not work the best here,” Zoey said, to which the other two girls furrowed their eyebrows at so she quickly followed up with, “But! We can do whoever survives the longest wins? Rumi first?”

As much as Zoey loved her girls, she had a feeling that neither of them would get victory royale.

(If one of them somehow did, she’d be proud and probably lose her mind.)

“When I win, you’ll wash the dishes for an entire month.” Rumi huffed, smirking at the taller girl.

Mira raised an eyebrow, “Okay princess, what makes you think you’ll win?”

“Princ— I thought we were over that?!” Rumi growled, though it was clearly playful and held no weight. “And of course, I’ll win — I had a good teacher, right Zo?” She smiled up at Zoey, all loud and proud, and then she winked.

Rumi winked.

Zoey barked out a laugh, hands on her hips, pointedly ignoring the flutter in her chest, “Eeexactly! As long as you remember what I taught you then you’ll definitely win.”

To Zoey’s surprise, Mira huffed softly at that, “Good point.”

Good point? Good point?! That means she thinks I’m good at the game right? Right? Like— 

Zoey chuckled, “Okay, okay! I’m gonna get some popcorn and be right back—“ Rumi looked about ready to combust at that, as if another second meant more chances of her losing

Despite thinking otherwise, Rumi was always so cute even when she didn’t try. 

“C’mon! This is too good,” Zoey shrugged, laughing, “It needs popcorn.”

Mira rolled her eyes playfully before waving her off, grumbling that she should make her trip quick. 

Zoey chuckled softly, keeping the image of Mira’s fond smile tucked away in her mind.

The two girls both called after her as soon as Zoey jumped over the couch and sprinted for their pantry, saying something along the lines of being careful and not wanting to deal with a broken nose tonight (or any night, really).

Zoey practically scrambled after herself, almost tearing their cupboards open to find the half-eaten bag of popcorn tucked away in the back. Microwaving popcorn would have been better but her patience was waning.

More so when Rumi called out to her, “Zo, you think I’ll win right!”

In theory, Rumi should win considering she had the most experience but Mira had this freakish ability of adapting wherever she went. It was cool but also annoyingly impressive when she could understand something within minutes and win.

It was like beginner’s luck but to an unfair amount.

Zoey merely laughed, to which she heard Mira make a remark about, as she poured the entire bag of popcorn in a bowl.

It’s like she had springs on her feet with how bouncy she felt, how light her chest felt. 

Zoey knew she was probably vibrating with excitement, with this feeling of contentment, but for once in her life she didn’t feel the need to tamper it. She didn’t feel the need to stuff it into a box and keep quiet.

Zoey pretty much threw the popcorn bag aside, knowing that Mira would probably scold her about it later, and ran over.

“Listen Rumi,” Zoey clutched the bowl of popcorn in her hands, “I totally believe in you but Mira also has this crazy ability to like to adapt to everyt…”

She stopped at the sight before her.

Mira and Rumi were giggling to each other — the latter more so, with Mira just smiling fondly at Rumi.

They were still playfully bickering, the banter bright and alive, but something in it was gentler. Softer. 

There was something different. Something new— no.

No, this wasn’t new. It had always been there. It’s just never been acknowledged by the two girls.

Not in the way Zoey had.

And suddenly, achingly, she was forced back to 5 years before their debut.

It was familiar, the ache.

But it was somehow heavier.

And for a moment, Zoey thought the Honmoon pulsed within her but then Rumi caught sight of her and beamed.

Rumi called to her, her patterns bright and free.

And Zoey smiled, running to the two girls she called home, and slotted herself in between them.

So she did it again.

She pushed away that same, aching feeling.

She pushed it away for 4 months.

—

Zoey felt it’s force during a clean-up.

Demons were still a thing even with Gwi-ma gone.

Their numbers were dwindling, sure, and large ripples were few and very far in between, so it really wasn’t that bad.

Still, after the creation of the new Honmoon, of their Honmoon, and Gwi-ma’s death, they figured that things couldn’t end seamlessly like they thought.

Though, their perspectives had long since changed.

Rather than lunging at demons with their weapons in tow, slashing at them with little regard — they learned to be a little gentler.

Mira no longer wore a scowl as she swiped at the demons and she no longer punted them in the face multiple times before killing them. Instead, she would merely cut them down cleanly, with a singular strike to their neck.

Rumi would mutter a soft apology as soon as they disintegrated. She’d close her eyes, smile softly though sadly, and under her breath would bid them a sincere goodbye.

Zoey made sure not to chuck her knives at their limbs anymore and aimed for their heads. A little morbid on paper but she tried her best to give them an easy and swift death. It’s the least she could do.

The demons, after all, were once souls taken away from their homes against their will.

Regardless, it wasn’t a surprise when the Honmoon would suddenly tremble with alarm — the girls would simply drop whatever they were doing and rush to the direction of the demons, eradicate them and then go back home.

However, even when the larger ripples were rare they also weren’t exactly impossible.

Maybe they had gotten a little too complacent with themselves, thinking that the decrease in demons meant less struggle but oh, how they were horribly humbled.

There had to be at least 30 demons scattered around when they arrived, at least from when Zoey took a quick survey, and they were hungry.

And angry.

Usually, that would be no issue. Was it a pain? Yes. Was it kinda annoying? Also yes. But was it a huge problem? No. 

They’ve been fighting demons since they were teens, this many demons were nothing compared to when Gwi-ma was still alive and kicking.

So yeah, everything was fine.

Supposedly.

“Okay, is it just me,” Zoey panted out, finding her position to Rumi’s right, “Or are they, like, angrier?”

Rumi wiped sweat from her brow, “This is ridiculous. I mean even before the idol— that, it wasn’t like this.”

“Whatever it is, something feels different.” Mira had jumped to Rumi’s left, Gok-do held tightly in her palms. Her eyes frantically scanned their surroundings, “Does the Honmoon feel off to you guys?”

Rumi was quick to answer, “No, why? Do you think it’s getting weaker?” Panic began to simmer beneath her voice, “Do you think it’s because of—“

“Nope!” Zoey threw a shin-kal at one of the demons, “Don’t even finish that sentence, Rumi!”

Mira grunted as she swung her weapon upwards, slicing a demon into two, “Zoey’s right—“ She clicked her tongue, swiftly dodging another demon’s uppercut before ramming the tip of her Gok-do into its forehead, “I was just asking— ugh, get off! I was just asking, just in case!”

Before Rumi could respond; however, another crowd of demons scrambled towards them. Snarls filled their ears and all three girls let out a collective groan at the sight of the herd.

Rumi let out an impatient growl as she pushed off one of the demons chomping at her sword, her stamina slowly depleting just like Mira and Zoey’s.

“Dammit,” Rumi swallowed, her breaths running short. They had to have been fighting for more than 45 minutes now, maybe even more than an hour, and it’s like the barrage of demons had no stopping point. “Zoey, can you get to a higher vantage point and see if there are any more demons?!”

Zoey dashed within seconds, finding higher ground in an instant. Zoey jumped up the buildings, using rusted pipes as a boost (which she definitely shouldn’t have), and with a high enough leap she landed on top of one of the rooftops. 

Rumi and Mira were fighting on top of the building just to the left of Zoey, countering demons with ease but it’s obvious the exhaustion of their prolonged fight was starting to get to them.

Zoey squinted, quickly surveying their surroundings, and instantly she saw two demons scrambling towards them from the east and two from west. “We have four more demons—“ She shook her head as she saw another two following, “Scratch that, we have six demons coming towards us!”

The sound of metal screeched to a halt, with Mira looking up, “Wait, what?!”

Zoey huffed — and she said she’s not deaf — and a little louder, said “I said there’s fou—” Zoey gasped, screaming in horror, “Mira, behind you!”

It’s almost as if it had happened in slow-mo. 

There was a demon hiding beneath the edge of the building, waiting for an opening, and it got it when Mira was distracted, when she was looking up at Zoey.

Its claws, sharp and pointed, lunged towards Mira, the tips closing in on Mira’s neck—

Zoey felt her stomach twist.

Then, suddenly a loud growl echoed through the silence.

The Honmoon trembled.

And a demonic squeal followed.

Zoey stood frozen as she watched Rumi’s sword impale the demon right in between its eyes, the sharp weapon lodged into its skull. A second passed, then another, before the demon’s figure disintegrated into the night air.

Rumi’s sword then clattered onto the ground.

Silence.

A breath.

Then, Mira fell to her knees. “Mira–!” Zoey’s foot twitched forward but Rumi was already running, sprinting.

Zoey’s voice caught in her throat, anxiously waiting.

She watched as Rumi practically fell to her knees beside the taller girl, her hands finding Mira’s shoulders. Her patterns, normally pulsing a dull white, was now bright with purple.

Zoey gritted her teeth, her jaw aching, as she waited for something, anything. 

Was Mira okay? Did it get her? Was she bleeding? Was she injured?

They were talking— Rumi was saying something but she was covering Mira so Zoey couldn’t tell if Mira was responding and her brain was just about to explode from impatience, from the beating in her chest, when finally Rumi turned around.

Mira, she— she was okay.

She just looked shaken up, breathed a little heavier, but she had that stupidly smug smirk plastered across her face.

Rumi laughed, though anyone could see the concern, the panic, still in her eyebrows. She still had her palms on Mira’s shoulders, her grip tight with the way her knuckles were pale white, but she was smiling. “Mira’s fine, Zo!” Rumi’s lips were lopsided, relief evident in it, “Just being a drama queen, like always!”

Zoey would’ve collapsed from sheer relief alone but she definitely wanted teasing rights over Mira falling onto her knees first. Zoey stuck her tongue out at Mira, grinning, “Looks like somebody’s stamina’s lacking!” She called out, smirking.

“Don’t get too cocky, eyebrows!”

“What the— Oh c’mon, I was ten years old! And I shaved it by accident!”

Mira opened her mouth to retort at that but before she could, Rumi had slapped a hand over it, “Don’t listen to her, I think they were great, Zo!”

Zoey loved Rumi, truly, but sometimes she thinks she’s a little too sweet for her own good, “Thanks Rumi, but that’s really not—” Before Zoey could defend herself, and huff at Mira for cackling at Rumi’s sweet attempt at helping her, a cacophony of wet snarls sliced through the light atmosphere.

And there was one that was particularly close to Zoey.

Mira grunted as she stood up, dusting away at her pants, “Okay, okay, defend your case later—” She re-summoned her Gok-do, twisting slightly to stretch out her body. “Let’s get these guys and go home, I need a week-long nap.”

Zoey nodded at that, her fingers humming to life as she re-summoned her knives. She faced the demon across from her, its face was twisted into a nasty grin.

“Zo, be careful!”

“I will, Ru, promise—” Zoey turned to look over her shoulder, and blinked. 

Rumi was a step closer to Mira, her hand resting gently on the taller girl’s neck. She was chewing her bottom lip, her eyebrows scrunched up, as she worriedly looked at Mira’s skin.

Zoey’s chest started to ache.

Then suddenly Mira’s eyes softened — again, it’s that look again.

Zoey gulped.

Mira leaned closer slightly, her fingers finding the gentle touch on her neck. She held Rumi’s hand in her own, then said something. Then slowly, Mira leaned into Rumi’s touch, her cheek pressed against patterned palms.

The moment was quiet. Sweet. Private.

Intimate.

And Zoey felt like she was intruding.

Zoey gasped as she heard footsteps running towards her – fast and quick. She whipped around and saw the demon jump towards her, claws extended.

Finding her ground again, Zoey dodged the swipe at the very last moment, distancing herself in the process. The demon snarled and tried again, jaw snapping with frustration.

Zoey clenched her jaw, swung her arm, and she let the Honmoon vibrate beneath her fingers and into her knives—

You’re a liar.

—A sharp pain plagued her chest.

It’s like a match had been lit over her flesh.

Caught off guard, Zoey let go of her knives causing it to slice the demon’s ankle instead.

The movement, her mistake, must’ve been loud enough to catch the other girls’ attention because Rumi then called out, “Zoey?!”

“I’m fi—”

Liar.

Flames enraptured her chest, burning and searing into her very skin.

Something sharp and all-consuming squeezed her lungs.

Zoey bit back a sob from the sheer pain before throwing another knife, this time with a lot more control. The knife cruelly impaled the demon’s eye, making him squeal in pain before fading into black dust.

She fell to her knees, the pain coming in waves. 

But as soon as she let her shin-kals disappear, the pain dissipated.

The violet ache in her chest was no longer there. As if I had never been there in the first place.

Zoey let out a loud gasp, finally feeling like she could breathe.

What the fuck?

Chapter Text

What happened after was a blur.

All Zoey really recalled was the sound of metal urgently slicing through demon flesh, followed by hurried footsteps towards her.

She felt hands on her, heard her name a couple of times, but Zoey couldn’t stop shaking.

The pain that had grabbed her chest was intense. It hurt.

It hurt so much it felt like someone had lit a fire under her own ribs.

Zoey didn’t really register anything until the following morning. The events of that hunt became a blur except for Mira falling to her knees and the searing ache that captured her chest.

“Hey.”

Zoey jolted, ruffling her sheets slightly. She snapped her head to the voice and felt her body lose its tension after seeing Rumi there. She was leaning against the door frame, arms crossed, and her expression was pulled into a strained smile.

“Hi.” Zoey returned it with a soft grin of her own.

Rumi hummed before walking closer. She was quiet the entire time, her strides gentle. A comfortable silence fell on them as Zoey watched the older girl situate herself beside her legs on the bed. Rumi looked at ease — well, that’s what she tried to come off as.

It was clear by Rumi’s stiff back, the slightly deeper circles beneath her eyes, and her clenched jaw that she was anything but relaxed.

Zoey parted her lips to say something, hoping to tame the slow spiral Rumi must’ve gone under last night, but before she could speak the other girl beat her to it.

“No more lies,” Rumi said softly, “Right?”

Zoey eyes widened. 

Rumi looked up at her, waiting. Seeking.

“Of course,” The answer came quicker to Zoey than she realized. For a second, she was glad that the response came quickly but on the other hand she felt guilty. She felt like a traitor, for breaking what they promised to each other.

But Zoey couldn’t exactly tell Rumi anything when she didn’t even know what that thing was.

Rumi looked unconvinced.

Of course she did. They’ve known each for almost a decade.

“I promise, Rumi,” Zoey added, scratching her nape. “I just… I think— Maybe I was just tired.”

Rumi looked like she wanted to pry a little more, to ask another question, but to Zoey’s relief she seemed to have just settled on, “Apparently we were fighting for almost 2 hours.”

Zoey’s eyes widened, “You’re kidding.”

Rumi snorted softly, “Nope.” She pinched at the bridge of her nose, “We got back around 2 in the morning— I know right?” She laughed as soon as she saw the disbelief on Zoey’s face.

“2 hours—“ Zoey gasped, “That’s insane.”

A comfortable silence fell on the two of them.

Well, kind of.

Zoey was still hung up on the events of last night.

By that sensation that clawed at her chest, at her flesh.

Zoey didn’t know what happened. It was a pain she’d never felt before. It wasn’t even close to when a demon’s claws would catch her skin, or their teeth would graze their arms, no, it was worse than that.

Just the thought of it made her shiver.

“Cold?”

Zoey blinked out of her stupor, smiling softly at Rumi who was leaning a little closer now. Her eyebrows were wrinkled again, eyes flaring with worry — it almost seemed like a permanent expression at this point.

Zoey snorted, tilting her head at the older girl and squinting, “Y’know, you’re gonna get those permanent crease lines on your forehead if you keep looking like that.” She pointed to her own forehead, smirking.

Rumi huffed, straightening her back. She let her palm find Zoey’s knee, the warmth seeping through the white sheets. “Yeah well maybe don’t just collapse out of nowhere?”

Zoey giggled at that.

“I’m not joking!” Rumi whined before narrowing her eyes at Zoey, though the glare was weak and could barely be called a glare. “I’m being serious, Zo.”

Even without the poor excuse of a glare, Zoey knew that Rumi wasn’t really angry. The telltale was the nickname. However, Zoey played along and put her hand up, the other on her heart, “I solemnly swear that I will not collapse out of nowhere during demon hunts.”

“You won’t collapse at all, you mean.”

Zoey cleared her throat.

Rumi groaned, “Zo.”

“Okay, okay, I promise!” Zoey then added, “Okay, well, I’ll try.”

“Zoey!”

“I’ll try my best!” Zoey laughed, tears springing to the corners of her eyes as she watched Rumi look seconds away from tearing at her hair. Zoey wiped at her eyes, her fit of laughter reduced to breathy giggles, “You’re too funny.”

Rumi huffed as she squeezed Zoey’s knee.

“Ugh,” Rumi pinched the bridge of her nose before looking back at Zoey, fondly rolling her eyes. “I swear, sometimes you—”

Zoey tried not to think about Rumi’s hand.

“—And Mira are like always an inch away from giving me a heart attack.”

Rumi was a step closer to Mira, her hand resting gently on the taller girl’s neck. She was chewing her bottom lip, her eyebrows scrunched up, as she worriedly looked at Mira’s skin.

Zoey felt a pulse in her chest.

Were you really worried for me? Like you were for her?

Her ribs itched.

What a selfish thought.

“Zo?”

“Huh?” Zoey took a sharp breath, her clothes suddenly feeling tight around her. “Oh, uh, sorry, spaced out— Super sorry, I honestly think I’m like just tired or, or something but anyway, you were—”

“Hey, hey,” Rumi shifted closer — in the back of her mind, Zoey desperately wished she hadn’t — and squeezed Zoey’s knee a little tighter. Her expression was twisted into concern again and Zoey would’ve teased her about it if not for the sudden breathlessness she felt. “It’s okay, don’t worry — I was just asking what you wanted to have for lunch?”

Zoey blinked.

Her throat suddenly felt dry. She gulped, breathed out and chuckled, “Uh, chicken?”

“Chicken? We had that yesterday.” Rumi raised an amused eyebrow.

Zoey gasped, “Are you…” She slouched, faking a pained expression, “Are you really refusing a sick person’s request?”

Rumi rolled her eyes as she stood up, jabbing softly at Zoey’s forehead, “Yeah, yeah.” She smiled, “I’ll ask Mira to order that for you, any specific store in mind?”

“Nope!” Zoey wiggled further into her bedsheets, “Oh yeah, what time’s the photoshoot tonight?”

“Oh that?” Rumi hummed, “Moved it.”

“Oh… wait what, why?”

“You’re sick, duh?”

Zoey whined, laying star-fish on the bed, “But I’m not actually sick! C’mon, Ru, I don’t want to stay home all day—”

Rumi snorted, “Try telling Mira that,” she crossed her arms over her chest. “See if you can convince her, then we can talk.”

Zoey narrowed her eyes at the older girl, “Convincing Mira is hard.” She huffed, “And you know that.”

Rumi smirked, “Exactly.” She winked before bidding the younger girl farewell, ignoring all of Zoey’s protests.

Zoey groaned, melting into her bedsheets for a little while longer.

—

Rumi is officially her second favourite person in the world.

(That’s a complete and utter lie – her and Mira are tied for first – but right now Rumi’s like 0.1 less than Mira. Okay, maybe like, 0.0000001.)

Rumi had to leave for a meeting with Bobby and a photoshoot. She had texted that the meeting was taking longer than expected so she’ll probably be back a bit before dinner.

Mira had to go in the morning for a modelling gig. She had texted that she should be back before lunch but that already passed. 

And Zoey’s bored.

Usually, Zoey would be working on producing some music for other groups, creating samples that their agency could use, but her mind was absolutely stumped right now. She was still a little sore from last night’s demon hunting, but she was also too bored to even work on music, and she had the whole burning feeling she had that she didn’t even want to think about.

Unfortunately, that’s the only thing she could actually work on.

But she really didn’t want to.

Zoey groaned, slapping an arm over her eyes. She counted to ten, then to twenty, then to thirty, then to— “Okay, okay, fine! It’s fine!” Zoey cursed under her breath as she sat up, fists clenched. “I have to— I have to figure out what’s going on anyway.”

She swung her feet over the edge of her bed, already mourning the warmth beneath her sheets, and stood up. 

Zoey rolled her shoulders, jumping slightly in her spot, “Okay, just summon ‘em.” She gulped as she flexed her fingers.

Zoey breathed in.

Okay. One. Two. Thre—

“I can’t do it!” Zoey let her hands fall to her knees. She shook her head, “Argh! But I have to— But what if it hurts again?!”

Frustrated, Zoey squeezed her eyes shut. She took a few deep breaths, breathing in through her mouth multiple times. She tried to calm her thundering heart and the thoughts flashing through her brain.

“Okay,” Zoey swallowed as she took another deep breath. She straightened her back, “Okay, it’s fine. It’s probably nothing.”

Zoey extended her arms as she chewed on her lip. She flexed her fingers, eyeing her hands carefully and wearily, “Probably just some crazy heartburn or– or something, right?”

Zoey tugged at the Honmoon, “I can’t look!” She turned her head away from her hands, too afraid to look. She braced herself, squeezing her eyes shut and mentally preparing herself for the pain that overtook her last night.

But after a moment.

A breath.

It was just… stale.

Well, not stale but dull.

Zoey’s eyes fluttered open softly, her breaths heavy with trepidation. She blinked. Slowly, Zoey’s eyes fluttered to her hands and she let out a gasp when she saw a pair of knives clutched in her palms.

Its magical glow flickered against the seeping sunlight and the soft blues pulsed softly in her hands.

Zoey let out a breath, “Heartburn…” She cheered, practically screaming, “It’s just heartburn, let’s goooo!”

Zoey leapt from her spot, pumping her fists in the air as she celebrated.

“Never knew heartburn was something to celebrate.”

Zoey whipped her head around, “Mira!” She beamed, letting out a laugh, “I had heartburn!”

Mira raised an eyebrow in confusion, “...Congrats?” She let herself in, scratching at the back of her head. She was dressed in her pajamas, the ones with bears printed all over it, and her hair was tied up into a messy bun. “Did you hit your head when you woke up?”

Zoey bounded towards her, eyes shining bright as she looked up at Mira, “When’s the chicken coming?”

“I have a better question—“

“Where’s the chicken!” Zoey grabbed Mira’s wrist, swinging it around. She felt like she solved a mystery, thank goodness.

Mira parted her lips, on the edge of persisting, but instead she sighed. The tension woven in Mira’s shoulders softened as she rolled her eyes, a fond smile on her face, “It’s actually here already. You done celebrating your heartburn?”

Zoey chuckled, fingers squeezing Mira’s wrist, “Yup! I’m all good now.” She ignored Mira’s grunts as she dragged them out of her room, a pep in her every step.

It was definitely heartburn. 

A little stronger but still heartburn. Or something.

Mira, and the absolute saint that she was, had already set up the plates on the table. A specific portion of rice was dumped on Zoey’s plate, just the right amount. Zoey smiled as she took her seat, already dipping her hand into the cardboard box of fried chicken.

“How was the photoshoot?” Zoey hummed as she took a bite from the drumstick she picked out, sighing in content.

“Good,” Mira grunted, “But there was one guy on set getting on my nerves.”

Zoey’s eyes flickered up to Mira, eyebrow raised, “Wait really? What’d he do?” Zoey went to pick from her portion of rice, mouth stuffed with pieces of meat.

“Ugh, he was just being an asshole— hang on, Zo.” Mira grabbed Zoey’s plate, much to the younger girl’s confusion, and with a chopstick, prodded at the rice. She quietly mixed it, clearly looking for something.

A second passed before Mira hummed to herself and switched their plates around.

Zoey blinked, tilting her head, slightly, in question. Mira, mid-chew, shrugged, “That one’s crispier.”

Zoey looked down at her plate, noticing that the bowl of rice had a little more orange to it. A little more scorched. 

Just how Zoey liked it.

“Oh, thanks,” Zoey smiled, happily munching at it. “The guy?”

“Hm? Oh yeah,” Mira huffed, “He was a pain in the ass and he clearly didn’t like women at all. He was misogynistic and he couldn’t even do his job well — screwed up the lighting multiple times.”

Zoey’s face twisted into disgust, “Eugh.”

Mira chuckled, “Yeah. Apparently he’s been a pain for a while now but they couldn’t get rid of him because he’s some son to some executive.”

Zoey narrowed her eyes at Mira, “Couldn’t? As in…”

Mira smirked, “Not all heroes wear capes.”

“You—“ Zoey snorted, eyes wide with surprise and pride, “How?! Wait did you like—“

Zoey’s words were lodged in her throat as Mira leaned closer, her hand extending. Zoey’s breath hitched as she felt a thumb brush the corner of her lips, the movement swift and gentle.

Mira let out a low chuckle, the sound reverberating in Zoey’s spine, “Nothing crazy. Just talked to someone I knew.” After wiping the corner of Zoey’s lips, Mira leaned back against her chair. 

Then, as if that wasn’t enough, Mira licked the crumb she picked from Zoey’s lips.

“But yeah,” Mira hummed, “Safe to say he’s out of the picture. Serves him right for being an absolute…”

Zoey watched Mira as she spoke, as she complained about the man at work while she was stuffing her mouth with food. She went on as if what she did was nothing, which yeah, technically it was nothing. It was supposed to be nothing.

Because that’s who Mira was, wasn’t she?

She loved quietly.

She didn’t do loud praises, she didn’t do physical contact like Zoey did, no, instead she’d stick by your side from sunset to sunrise. Instead, she’d move closer when you were falling asleep and gently tug you to her shoulder. Instead, she’d order something disgustingly sweet, even if she didn’t like it, so you can get an additional treat during the trainee days. Instead, she’d force herself awake to keep listening to facts upon facts about turtles.

That’s just who Mira was.

She held Zoey and Rumi’s hearts so carefully, gently, despite never being held like that before.

But maybe she held Rumi’s a little closer. A little tighter.

“...ey?”

Zoey's chest tightened. Instinctively, her hand clutched at her shirt.

“Zoey!”

A breath got caught in Zoey’s throat, making her choke on air as she snapped her head up to Mira. She coughed, face twisting into a mix of embarrassment and slight pain. Zoey took the cup of water pushed towards her, chugging it within seconds.

“Sorry, sorry,” Zoey said after drinking the entire glass. She wiped the corners of her lips with her sleeve, a sheepish smile finding her face, “Um… so what were you saying—”

“What’s going on?” Mira had that look.

Mira’s face was neutral, for the most part, but only to the naked eye. Zoey knew that look. It’s the look she wore whenever they were hiding something, lying about something. Mira’s face wasn’t stern, nor was it intimidating, but there was a certain sharpness to it.

Like she was staring into Zoey’s very soul.

“Nothing! Nothing!” Zoey groaned when Mira didn’t move. She was definitely not convinced. “I promise! I think it was just heartburn, to be honest.”

Sure, sounds legit.

“Heartburn?” Mira’s face didn’t change as she said, “Again?” She leaned back against her chair, tilting her head, eyebrow raised slightly.

Curse you and your stupid intuition for these things, Mir!

Zoey nodded, desperately masking the anxiety crawling up her spine. She could feel her skin tingle, her nape burned hot, when Mira was looking at her. The taller girl’s gaze was unrelenting, almost as if she was looking for something in Zoey’s eyes.

Zoey didn’t look away — Mira would instantly know that she was lying.

Play it smart.

“Okay… maybe just now I had heartburn.” Zoey breathed out, back slouching, feigning disappointment. “I— I dunno, I think maybe it has to do with… stamina? Or— I don’t know!”

Okay, stamina. Good start. Good lie.

In the corner of Zoey’s eyes, the tension that had woven itself into Mira’s shoulder softened slightly. That was a good sign. In silence, Zoey continued, shrugging, “I just…” She played it up, the embarrassment, the shame, the frustration, “I feel like I’m slower?”

Mira’s eyebrows went lax.

Zoey added, “And yeah, I know, nothing necessarily changed — I know Rumi would probably say the same thing but I just… Maybe it’s because we haven’t been demon hunting so often now that—”

“—You’re not getting as much practice like you used to?” Mira finished for her. Her face was no longer sharp, no longer scrutinizing, it was softer.

Zoey nodded, huffing, “...Yeah.”

The guilt. 

The guilt tickled at her back, the knowledge that everything she just said was a complete and utter lie made Zoey want to already spill the truth. More so when Mira looked at her with concern, with worry, with this sense of vulnerability that she seldom shows to other people aside from Zoey and Rumi.

Zoey looked down. She couldn’t look at Mira.

“Hey,” Zoey heard Mira say. 

There’s shift in Mira’s chair, the muted sound of its legs scraping against the floor filled her ears, and then suddenly she felt a finger under her chin. Zoey, completely caught off guard, follows suit, unprepared. 

Mira was looking at her, eyebrows knitted, face twisted into sympathy and worry.

“Get outta that head of yours,” Mira hummed softly, a gentle smile finding her lips.

Zoey felt her insides churn. If only Mira knew what she was really thinking about.

Mira’s voice was so soft. So patient. “There’s nothing wrong with feeling that way,” Mira leaned back, thankfully letting Zoey breathe, “And to be honest, I feel that way sometimes too.”

Zoey perked up at that, “You do?”

“Of course I do. It’s nice, you know, to not go demon hunting as much anymore.” Mira hummed, “But it also feels… weird.”

Weird was a bit of an understatement, now that Zoey was thinking about it. Demon hunting was something they’ve been doing for a majority of their lives, it’s been a part of their very being, instilled into their heads and body, courtesy of their teacher.

Mira continued, “Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad we’re done with that. Well, kinda at least,” she huffed. She sighed, “But there’s nothing wrong with being frustrated or confused about the change. Sometimes, I can’t help but think I’m slacking, thinking that I’m not doing my due diligence as a hunter because it’s just so… quiet.”

Zoey nodded, listening patiently. Mira took that as a sign to continue, “Sometimes I feel the same way. It’s probably just in my head but I feel like I wield my Gok-do slower, move slower… I feel like I just got less—”

“Hunter-y?” Zoey chuckled, soft and gentle.

Mira snorted, “Exactly.” She then shrugged, “But honestly? Maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe it’s good to finally get the chance to relax and be bored.”

“I guess you’re right,” Zoey muttered. A part of her was glad they were having this conversation. A part of her felt horrible for lying about what she felt to Mira, who readily splayed herself out for Zoey’s comfort.

“Of course I’m right,” Mira smirked as she shifted in her chair. She seemed like she was about to say something else, her lips parting, but then her eyes lit up slightly and settled on, “Actually, I have an idea of what we can do.”

Zoey liked the sound of that, but the mischief that briefly passed over Mira’s eyes made her feel a little weary. With furrowed eyebrows, Zoey asked, “What can we do?”

For a moment, Zoey naively thought that Mira’s idea would include a flat screen tv and a couch with a plate of desserts settled between them but she was mistaken. Sorely mistaken.

“Let’s spar.”

Zoey blinked. “…Spar.”

Uh oh.

“Yeah,” Mira chuckled as she took a bite of some chicken. “You know, kinda like the old days.”

“Like the old days.” Zoey echoed.

Oh no.

“Mhm.” Mira shrugged, “I mean you did say you felt a little slow, right? Let’s test it out.”

Mira was smirking. Mira was full on smirking which meant there was definitely an ulterior motive here.

“Actually, I think my stamina, or speed or whatever, just needed some chicken—“

“Noooo way,” Mira laughed, shaking her head as she pushed her utensils aside. “You’re not escaping out of this, Zo, no way.”

Crap.

Zoey opened her mouth to throw out another excuse, maybe feign a stomachache, before sighing. She then huffed, eyes furrowing as she thought about the idea a little more. She figured a little exercise on the mats could do her some good, maybe it was just her stamina lacking that caused the weird piercing feeling in her chest.

Well, that was a bit of a reach but Zoey would take any explanation at this point.

“Fine,” Zoey whined. “Any new rules? Also do we have any new wooden swords? I swear the ones we have are gonna break from like just by looking at the—“

“Wooden swords?” Mira smirked, “C’mon, Zo, when I said the old days, I didn’t mean the old old days.”

Zoey blinked at her.

Mira summoned her Gok-do in one quick second. The weapon rested in her palms, standing up-right and tall. She winked at Zoey, “Gym?”

Zoey gulped.

I’m screwed.

Chapter Text

Zoey didn’t know what to do.

She tried her absolute best to stall — she offered to wash the dishes and cleaned them so thoroughly she thought she’d rubbed off the coating. Zoey offered to wipe the table they ate at, brushing Mira off and telling her to get ready. Zoey even took her time to get ready, brushing her teeth extra slow, rummaging through her clothes even slower.

But there’s only so much stalling she could do.

Technically, there was an easy resolution to all of this. Zoey could say no, change her mind, and Mira would accept it in a heartbeat. She’d even offer to laze around on the couch together if Zoey just asked.

But Mira would be suspicious. 

She wouldn’t ask at the moment, she wouldn’t prod, but she would ask at one point. If not now, then later.

And if Zoey didn’t have an answer now then she seriously doubted she’d have an answer later.

“It’s fine,” Zoey laughed to herself, “Everything is fine. Just, you know, fight like usual and nothing will happen.”

She looked up, catching herself in the mirror of the elevator. Her reflection definitely didn’t help with the delusion she was trying to set up for herself.

Zoey’s forehead was glistening slightly, a telltale of her growing anxiety, and her expression looked like someone had a gun to her head and told her to smile.

Not entirely far from the truth.

Zoey groaned, turning around and leaning against the elevator rails. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying her best to calm the thundering of her heart as the elevator descended to their ‘special’ gym. It was just a larger gym with higher ceilings to accommodate their unconventional training routines.

Zoey flexed her fingers and tugged at the Honmoon, sighing when her knives popped into her palms like it was nothing.

Her chest felt fine, her entire body felt fine, and the magic that thrummed through her fingers was nothing new. 

“I don’t get it,” Zoey’s eyebrows furrowed slightly, her eyes narrowing at the knives in her palms. “I don’t feel anything right now… and I didn’t feel much earlier.”

Zoey tried her best to back track, meticulously running through every single minute of the day in hopes that something would lead her to the truth. She thought back to the moment it first happened, the demon hunt that lasted them 2 hours.

Everything was the same. Nothing changed.

Except… Except something did.

Not with her. 

But with them.

With Rumi and Mira.

It was after the idol awards. A few months after… or maybe it was right after?

But what changed? What exactly changed? And why would it matter to Zoey—

“You gonna get out of the elevator or are you going to tell me that the elevator needed some kind of fixing only you can do?”

Zoey yelped, jolting away from the elevator railing in surprise. She let out a breath, only then realizing that she was holding it in the first place. “Mira! Sorry— Wait, did I take that long in here?”

Mira snorted, “Not really, no, but you took long enough to look weird.”

Zoey huffed, “I’m strategizing.”

“Oh yeah?” Mira moved as Zoey stepped out of the elevator, “Don’t think you’ll need to.”

Zoey haphazardly dropped her water bottle onto the bench, hands on her hips as she narrowed her eyes at the taller girl, “You’re right I don’t need to.” She grinned, resummoning two of her blades, “I’ll just win.”

Mira summoned her Gok-do as she walked to the middle of the gym. She raised an eyebrow, smirking, “Or you’ll just lose.” 

“First to fall on their butt loses?” Zoey challenged.

“Loser washes the dishes for a month?”

Zoey spinned the shin-kal in her fingers, the blade moving swiftly between her nimble fingers. She followed suit, walking to the spot just across from Mira, “Oh you’re on.”

Momentarily, the solid weight of her knives, Mira’s playfully cocky grin, and the steady thrum of the Honmoon made Zoey forget the ache that continued to plague her mind.

Momentarily.

—

Mira was a strong fighter — she was agile and smart, calculating her every move with a precision that matched Celine’s. Her Gok-do was a long weapon and something like that could serve as a hindrance when yielded improperly but, if anything, that put Mira at an advantage.

She can reach further, swing further, and she knows how to use that with her every strike. 

Mira choreographed her fights like she did with her dance — sharp, quick, but intentional. 

Where Rumi was mostly muscle in her swings, Mira was all precision. Heavy precision.

But, Zoey was faster. Always.

It was always a silent agreement among the three that Zoey was the fastest and that her near inhumane reflexes were nothing to brush off. Mira could swing her weapon as much as she’d like but she knew it’ll take more than that to bring Zoey down.

Mira swung her Gok-do again, smirking when Zoey twisted around it and countered. The talker girl jumped back at the last second, parrying another strike that Zoey let out.

“Getting tired?” Zoey grinned as she stepped back, panting slightly.

Mira raised an eyebrow, “Me? You’re breathing harder than I am.”

“Mm, I dunno you seem like you’re holding your brea— woah!” Zoey yelped when Mira suddenly lunged forward, the Gok-do slicing down at her. Rather than falling to her bottom, however, Zoey leapt back just in time, her feet skidding slightly against the polished floors.

Mira straightened back up, spinning the Gok-do back to her side, “Sorry, you were saying?” She smiled when Zoey pouted at her, chuckling after interrupting her on purpose. “You’re cute when you pout.”

Zoey’s cheeks flushed, “Flattery won’t get you anywhere, you know!” Zoey pushed off the balls of her feet and at Mira, knives clutched loosely in her palms.

She dodged Mira’s slices with ease, her eyes quick to predict the incoming attack. As one particular attack swung down, Zoey expertly stepped to the side until she was right beside Mira.

With enough power, Zoey anchored her feet down and swung back with one of her knives. She twisted her body to give herself enough momentum as she threw her hand back with the shin-kal clutched tightly in her palm.

Zoey couldn’t help the smirk that graced her face when she heard Mira’s gasp but her small victory was short-lived when the taller girl jumped back just in time. Zoey ended up swinging into thin air and Mira instantly caught the sliver of an opening.

Mira, with her Gok-do initially pointed to the floor and enough space between them, drew her weapon up in one swift strike hoping to catch Zoey off-guard.

Luckily, well unluckily for Mira, Zoey caught the attack just in time. She blocked the blade between her two knives, keeping the spear below her waist line though struggling slightly.

Mira was fighting against Zoey’s blades and Zoey the opposite.

“Almost got you there,” Mira smirked.

Zoey huffed, grinning, “But you didn’t!”

Before Mira could slash through Zoey’s defense, the latter jumped back and put a safe distance between them. Quickly, Zoey got into her stance, her feet spread apart, her shoulders tight, and her wrists ready to take another weighted strike.

Mira rolled her shoulders, stretching out her neck, “But seriously, your reflexes are as freaky as ever.” She chuckled, her cocky smirk softening into a smile, “Not that I’m surprised.”

Zoey relaxed slightly, though not breaking her stance, “Yeah, well, your strength is as morbid as ever.” Zoey wheezed, but smiled instantly when Mira laughed. “I mean, seriously, what the hell did you eat as a kid? Spinach? Were you, like, fed that religiously or something?”

Mira chuckled, “Something like that.” She lunged forward with little warning, her Gok-do clenched in her hands.

Zoey’s eyes widened as she hardened her grip, her elbows preparing for the impact which definitely came. Mira crossed the distance between them terrifyingly fast, her speed a clear indication of her skill as a hunter.

Mira grunted, clicking her tongue in playful annoyance, “You’re— ngh— really damn fast, aren’t you?”

But, as always, Zoey was faster.

Mira had angled her foot before she leapt forward and, instantly, Zoey knew what was coming next. 

She smirked as Mira pressed against the shin-kal blocking the blade of her Gok-do, her sheer strength making the smaller blades tremble slightly.

“I saw it before—” Zoey looked up at Mira, their faces inches apart, and grinned, “— you even thought it.”

“Oh yeah?” Mira huffed as she pushed further, the corners of her lips twitching slightly when Zoey’s blades trembled a little more, “You think you know everything about me?

Zoey smiled, almost victoriously, as she fought against Mira’s strong offense. She was quietly proud of herself for blocking and holding such a heavy attack, despite the increasing difficulty of doing so. 

Snorting, Zoey rolled her eyes, “I know every—”

“I kissed Rumi.”

A breath.

The shin-kal trembled.

Mira swung down, breaking through the defense, and made another swing in hopes to trip Zoey.

Zoey jumped back just in time.

A short distance kept them apart.

Mira didn’t attack.

“Caught you off guard,” Mira smiled, strained. “Didn’t I?” She didn’t look up.

Her expression showed her anxiety, wrinkled with worry, with this naked vulnerability that was usually masked by a defiant gaze. Mira’s jaw was clenched, teeth gritted, and her strained smile dropped to a thin line. 

Mira swallowed. She took a breath. A shaky one.

“It was a week before game night, the one when I played Fortnite for the first time,” Mira breathed, gripping her Gok-do. “It was… late at night. Midnight, I think. Rumi and I… we talked. Like actually talked.”

Zoey watched. Listened.

Mira continued, “I apologized. For pushing her, for the stupid idol awards, for raising my sword at her— for everything, I apologized for everything.” Her voice cracked. “Rumi apologized too. For lying, for keeping everything a secret— I told her it wasn’t her fault, it was never her fault and then… I—I don’t know, all I remember is that we were crying. A lot.”

Zoey couldn’t tell if she was still breathing.

“Then I… I looked at her. Saw her. And I just… Everything felt right—” Mira bit her lip. She clenched her fist, “So I kissed her… I kissed Rumi.”

Zoey couldn’t tell if she was still here.

“She kissed me back and I…” Mira swung her hand away, letting the Gok-do disappear into thin air as she snapped around to face Zoey. Mira’s eyes glistened under the gym light, her brown eyes illuminated and glowing with guilt. Not for kissing Rumi.

But for keeping it from Zoey.

The Honmoon tugged at her.

“We were going to tell you, Zo, I promise,” Mira spoke fast, her breaths coming quickly, “We just wanted to find the right time. The time where Rumi and I actually knew what was going on, where we weren’t stuck in this limbo—”

Zoey listened. She tried to.

The air felt heavy. Thick. 

“—But we just wanted things to be right, we wanted things to be stable before telling you—”

Her stomach churned.

“But I don’t think this is new—” Distantly, Mira continued. “I think— I think I’ve always felt this.”

Something wasn’t right.

“And…I honestly don’t know. Maybe it’s the new Honmoon, or something, but I just felt this tug—

Something was wrong.

“I think… ”

It felt wrong.

“—I think I love her.”

The shin-kal felt wrong.

“I think I’ve always loved Rumi, Zo.”

The shin-kal felt wrong in her hands.

A burst of pain was set ablaze through her. It felt like fire was lit below the soles of her feet, over her abdomen, her arms, her very chest, and the searing hot pain crawled all over her skin and curled around her like a tight embrace.

The handles of the blades she used to protect herself trembled under her touch, the once comforting material felt like blades piercing through her very palms. 

Zoey wanted to fall to her knees and scream.

“Zoey?” Mira took a step closer. Her eyes filled with worry, “Hey— Are you okay?”

Zoey clenched her blade.

She couldn’t speak. She was too afraid.

Too afraid that she would cry out.

“You’re freaking me out, Zo,” Mira stretched out a hand, frowning when Zoey didn’t move forward. “Say something, anything—” Mira took another step forward.

It almost felt like there was a sharp knife tearing at her very hands, slicing away at her flesh to let go of the weapon clenched so tightly in her palms.

Zoey took a step back.

Mira’s eyes widened, hurt flashing in them. Mira’s shoulders dropped. “Zoey, look, I’m sorry— I’m sorry that we hid this from you but don’t do this.”

The pain that wrapped itself around her dug into her skin, burying itself deep into her muscle and her bones — it was sharp, burning.

Zoey wanted to throw up.

“Zoey, come on—”

A loud buzz echoed. A ringtone following. Someone was calling Mira.

Mira’s eyebrow twitched, her expression flaring with irritation as she tucked her hand into her pocket with the intention of hanging up.

“Take it.” Zoey managed to choke out.

Something tight wrapped around her throat.

Mira snapped her head up, her expression twisting, taken aback and pained. Her eyebrows wrinkled slightly, her cheeks flushed, and her eyes glistened under the light. Mira’s fingers twitched around her phone, tempted to reject the phone call, but Zoey glanced at her pocket again.

“We need to tal—” A loud ringtone filled the space and Mira clicked her tongue in shaky annoyance as she practically ripped her phone out from her pocket. Without looking at it, Mira swiped across her screen and put it up to her ear so quickly that she couldn’t stop the irritation from spilling as she said, “What?!”

Zoey’s fingers trembled against her thighs, shaking, and wanting to claw at her aching chest.

The pain was unbearable. Her heart was beating out of her ribs, thrumming in her very own ears she thought she’d go deaf with how loud it pounded. 

It was violent, this feeling, and it didn’t stop. 

It rushed through her like a knife cutting through flesh, like someone was dragging a blade through her skin and digging it into freshly cut wounds. 

It felt like a burn. Like a stab. Like a slash. Like everything horrible.

Distantly, Zoey heard Bobby’s voice on the other side of the phone. He was panicking. Something about needing to discuss with executives. Something about trouble. Something about needing Mira.

But I need her.

Zoey bit her lip. She bit so hard it drew blood.

No, no. Rumi already has her—

A knife, or at least the feeling of it, caressed her heart. 

I don’t need her.

Liar.

The knife, the sharp and pointed blade, buried itself into her chest.

Zoey wanted to sob.

She wanted to cry out to Mira. 

She wanted to fall into the older girl’s arms like she always did.

“Look I’m busy right now, Bobby, can we talk some other time— No, I know it’s important! I just— This is really urg—”

“You,” Zoey swallowed, “should go.”

Mira trailed off, her breath hitching to her throat. She slowly turned her head around, eyes wanting to meet Zoey’s but she was already looking the other way. 

In the corner of her eye, Zoey could tell Mira was waiting in quiet shock.

But Zoey couldn’t look. She couldn’t meet Mira’s eyes.

After a moment, Zoey heard ruffling.

Then a quiet breath. Through gritted teeth, Zoey heard Mira say, “I’ll be there in ten, Bobby.” Mira was still looking at Zoey, hoping.

Zoey didn’t give in.

The pain doubled. It pierced her heart and blanketed itself over her entire body.

Zoey, vaguely, heard Mira end the call even before Bobby finished speaking. Strained, the older girl said, “We’re going to talk later.” A second. Then, in a softer tone, “...Please.”

Mira rarely said please. Always carefully hiding her vulnerability with a brash front. But with Rumi and Zoey she was always so free.

Zoey doesn’t nod. She doesn’t move.

She merely listened as Mira hesitated, let out a breath, and turned around. The taller girl dragged herself to the elevator and Zoey could still feel her gaze. 

She was probably hoping that Zoey would meet her halfway through. 

Zoey doesn’t.

She waited.

The elevator doors slowly slid, the heavy silence filling the large space, and after a second they closed shut. The familiar ding of the elevator echoed and soft movement followed after.

Zoey waited.

A second.

A minute.

Zoey wheezed, her breaths coming short and fast. 

She bolted to the bathroom, stumbling and nearly tripping over herself as she sprinted. 

The pain didn’t leave, the angry sensation of a knife cutting through her insides and fire encompassing her flesh only stayed and increased.

A desperate sob escaped Zoey’s lips as she practically threw the bathroom door open and fell to her knees. The dull ache that shot up her knee from the impact was nothing compared to the searing ache that circled her entire body.

Zoey scrambled against the toilet bowl, retched, before throwing up into the bowl. 

She was half-expecting blood to follow suit but nothing — it was just her lunch and water.

The pain didn’t stop.

Tears streamed down Zoey’s cheeks as she gripped the sides of the toilet seat, her abdomen twitching as she continued to vomit. Her body screamed, her brain throbbed, and she felt like she was about to pass out at any given moment.

Her chest heaved, as if trying to help her breathe, but it did nothing. It only exacerbated the burning sensation that spread across her chest, as if that wasn’t enough on its own.

Snot dribbled down her chin, tears rolling down her face, and Zoey sobbed.

“Please…” Zoey pleaded, wheezing as the Honmoon vibrated in her ear, trembled from within her, and pounded heavily around her. She couldn’t stop the desperate howl that left her lips, “Please Stop…”

Zoey doubled over the toilet again, her back aching with discomfort, her stomach stinging with the searing sensation and the fatigue from throwing up.

“I don’t—” Zoey wept, heaving, “I don’t know what to do— It hurts, it hurts so bad—”

There was a pulse in her chest as she saw Mira and Rumi laugh.

There was a subtle ache in her ribs as she saw the way Mira smiled at Rumi.

Liar.

Zoey whimpered.

Mira and Rumi were giggling to each other — the latter more so, with Mira just smiling fondly at Rumi.

They were still playfully bickering, the banter bright and alive, but something in it was gentler. Softer. 

A tug.

Mira leaned closer slightly, her fingers finding the gentle touch on her neck. She held Rumi’s hand in her own, then said something. Then slowly, Mira leaned into Rumi’s touch, her cheek pressed against patterned palms.

The pain doubled.

The moment was quiet. Sweet. Private. Intimate.

Zoey gripped the toilet.

“And…I honestly don’t know. Maybe it’s the new Honmoon, or something, but I just felt this tug—”

Zoey lurched over the toilet seat.

“I think I’ve always loved Rumi, Zo.”

I love her too, Mira.

Zoey choked.

I love you too.

The pain softened to a dull ache.

Zoey fell on her side. Curling into herself.

I loved you both.

And Zoey grieved. 

She grieved for a home that only had room for two.