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If you were to ask Astrobox how xe got into this situation, xe would not be able to answer that at all. Dressed in bright green, stuffy constricting shoes and a strange box in hand that blasted loud, yet familiar music to the alien, it felt... Strange, to say the least. Xe was not on xyr home planet, that's for sure.
"Hey, Boombox! The match's nearly ready, and you're on our team! C'mon!" A strange red-clad creature called out at a distance— he had this strange board thing with wheels and a strange face— two peepers and an absence of whiskers. Wait. Boombox? No, xyr name was Astrobox. Not... That. It was close enough, at least. "Hey man, you good?" Ah. Forgot about him.
"Yez, uumm.... Coming!" Gosh, this dialect was weird! Clearly unpracticed on xyr tongue, and xyr accent was gurgly, thick and unnatural, but the other shrugged it off, from what Astrobox could see. Ah well. It shouldn't be too bad, whatever "matches" this guy was talking about!
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Skateboard, the alien later learned was his name, was nice, yeah, and would ward off anybody that got too close to xem, but great gnarptonians, was this stuff weird! Why were they all attacking eachother?! Xe would try and "support" xyr teammates the best xe could, but they apparently did something wrong with the loud "Victory to the Red Team! Defeat to the Blue team, That rang out. "Great Job out there, all of you! Please return to the changing rooms for the next match."
Awh, glorsh. That was painful. Apparently, xe died a total of 9 times! 9! And got... 4 assists, and a single kill. That was terrible, really—
"Boombox! What was that, man?!" A different voice came— again, from the distance. A massive weird contraption resting upon their shoulders with two blue horns and a strange fabric wrap around their forehead. "... Hey, are you ill or something? Dude, you know you can tell Flipside you're ill and can't participate man, nobody's forcing you."
Oogh, there they go again with that 'Boombox' zhit! Who was that gleep, really?! Clearly xe didn't know, and everygnorp did!
"Guuhh... Zorry! Not zick or anything... Gnarp." Xyr antennae would droop, and a quiet series of clicks followed after, guilt evident in xyr body language.
"Oh, whatever... You're always so stubborn with these things!" And off they went, into some other direction to talk with the other 'Inphurnals' or whatever— Thankfully Astro had later learned what they're called. Xe couldn't keep calling them all creatures! Gorsh, xe should probably freshen up or whatever... Now, did xe still have some snacks in xyr pocket?... Oh, glorp, xe did!
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"... Coil, you have got to listen to me. Something's clearly not right with him. I'm being serious...!" How long has it been, that he's been sat down on this bench, listening to Skateboard crying out about 'something being wrong with Boombox' for... What, the past 15 minutes? The match was about to start, and he had literally come up to him in such worry, he'd thought the other witnessed a horrific murder. Coil really could not help but sigh,
"You've been crying about how he 'looked greener than usual' to me ever since that match ended. Are you under the weather or something? You sure you're not the one that isn't green with sick or something?" Coil stood up, irritated. "That guy's whole apartment is green, we wears green, his lights— I'm pretty sure— are green. Listen to me, Skate. That guy eats, sleeps, breathes green, and I'm not exaggerating when I say you could list something and there's a 90% chance Boombox has that exact thing in green."
Skateboard just looked more distressed by the second, and honestly Coil was convinced the guy would have all of the Inpherno worried by how pale he was.
"But Coil—" "No. I'm sure you're just exaggerating and he's fine. If you're so worried though, I'll keep an eye on the guy. I'm sure it's nothing serious..."
Finally, Skateboard sighed and nodded, walking away after a final agreement of Coil looking out for the DJ, and Skate focusing on actually looking for Coil's fellow support, Medkit, instead of his own, Boombox.
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With the next round, Coil peered around for a certain green phighter... Which honestly didn't take that long, the guy trailing behind Banhammer like a lost puppy. 'Jackpot', is what Coil would've thought to himself, if it weren't for the fact Skateboard was right. That guy was Green. What the fuck?
Throughout the match, Coil would occasionally glance at Boombox, his moves sloppy, uncoordinated and lost. He's been participating in phights for ages; he knew this stuff like he back of his hand— why was he now playing like a newlyspawned too?
Unfortunately, his train of thought was cut short, as he was slammed to a wall by a heavy force that could only be sourced from the warden's massive hammer.
"Heh, gotcha now, ya criminal!" A gruff, hearty cry, the blindfold creasing a little as his eyes squinted in glee. "Yer verdict is..."
"GUILTY!"
...
Yeowch. Ah well. At least Skate wasn't lying...
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"Oi! Coil er.. whatever. You!" The warden barked out at him. Great, more people to pester him— he really didn't want bothered by the warden no less.
"What do you want man?" Well that shook Banhammer right up, a tilt of his head and a larger frown somehow following suit.
"Yeah. Exactly what I'm here for. Yer actin' odd, ya'know. Yer grumpy. Quiet. Usually I'd be cheerin' over the fact you decided to finally shut yer trap n' all that, quittin' yer tauntin and jabber, but it was weird seein' you so serious, and even takin' my Phinisher with such acceptance, n' no barkin' and laughin'! If only that Broker was like that..." Banhammer winded on, leaving Coil to huff and finally crane his head fully to look at the warden.
"It's Boombox. Have you seen the guy? Me n' Skate were talking about it." Banhammer stopped his mindless rambling, now listening to the criminal. "Have you noticed he's more... Green?"
"Green?"
"Yeah, green."
...
"The fuck do ya mean green. You hearin' yerself?"
Bro.
"If you're gonna bite back with 'oh he's always green', I know. The guy's green. I legit said that to Skate. But... When I actually looked at him he was... SFOTH, I don't even know!" Banhammer's finger twitched, teeth starting to show. Oh, right. Whatever. "But— Just— He's Even more green than before. That's literally— That's why my performance was shit, dude. 'Cuz of Boombox."
The warden furrowed his eyebrows as his hammer was clenched a little tighter. "So yer performance was shit, earnin' us more points... 'Cuz of Boombox?"
"Yeah."
"...'Cuz of Boombox. Bein' more green?"
"Yeah, basically."
...
"Right." Banhammer grunted. Inching away from Coil as if he were truly crazy. "I'm... Gonna go now. I'll even knock some sense into that guy! Boombox! Tell him ta.. be less green or whatever yer yappin' about." With heavy, armored stomps, off went the warden.
Honestly, was it just him, or did Boombox's horns have suckers???
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It was the end of all the Phights, everybody usually would now be leaving, asking Zuka to give them a ride back to Crossroads or lingering just to chat. But today, near everybody huddled up, concern on their faces. Everybody but one...
"Right..." A heavy Western accent spoke up— Scythe, leaning on a disgruntled Slingshot. "So we're all agreein' t' confront 'im bout this... Green thingy?"
"Pretty much." Medkit sighed, "Coil and I discussed this and we'd agreed we had both seen Boombox's horns having suckers akin to an octopus." Another round of hushed murmurs rang out.
"Oh, oh," Skateboard piped up suddenly, all heads now turned to him, "I did also notice he had like these... Whisker thingys. And antennae!"
...
"Antennae?" Banhammer repeated, clearly disgruntled.
"Yeah, antennae." He confirmed, "on his head like... Right here." The skater finished off, pointing to his forehead, approximately where Boombox's supposed antennae would be.
"When you all said he was greener than usual, that's because his coat wasn't grey. It was literally green." Another voice called out— Hyperlaser. "I had overheard some of you talk about this, so I had tried to get as close as possible and I can confirm he was entirely... Green."
Coil couldn't help but press the tissue harder against his leaky eye, a frown growing heavier by the second. There was no way that was Boombox. By the sounds of it, it was like they were describing...
"Err, hey guyz, what are we talking 'bout? Gleep!" 'Boombox' chirped out.
Seconds passed before Skateboard shrieked, pushing past Medkit, who yelped.
"You're not Boombox!"
Silence fell over the whole group, the rumble of Zuka's truck in the distance being the only sound to loosely break the silence. All heads having turned to look at 'Boombox'. It took a moment, a long one, until finally, someone to step forward; spurs clinking as heeled boots came out from the crowd.
"Honey," Scythe, hand gripping the rim of her hat as she inched closer and closer towards 'Boombox'. "If you're not Boombox... Then who are ya?"
'Boombox' trilled, excitedly waving his arms. "Oh, finally! Yez, I'm not thizz... Boombox you all zpeak of! I'm Aztrobox! Gnorp! Not Boombox!!"
What.
"Astrobox?" Banhammer spoke up, bewildered. How have they all not noticed a literal alien amongst them?! All because the actual Boombox sped past them all like a green blur during matches?!
"That does explain the strange variation of music." Medkit pointed a finger towards Astrobox's own boombox, some otherworldly 'pop' song droning out.
The alien would pout clutching xyr boombox towards xyrself. "Watch it, Medz-kit! Thiz iz my muzic you're inzulting! In fact, you all look weird if that'z where you wanna go!" A hiss as xyr fur stood up.
"Ah... Apologies." The doctor mumbled, dress shoes clacking against concrete lightly as he shuffled a little more to the back.
"Well... I guess that's all sorted then? Guess that's why 'Boombox' was acting weird? 'Cuz it wasn't Boombox?" Coil shrugged, clearly just as confused as everybody else.
"Uh... Well, we were planning on having dinner at Sling's café. Wanna come with?" Skateboard shrugged as he looked between Coil and Astrobox, who eagerly nodded as xe chirped and ran towards the skater.
"Ooh, yez, yez! I want to try your Inphernal food, gnorp!" Xe cried out as slowly, everybody started to leave, murmurs still remaining all throughout.
"Welp anyway, Sling, what's for dinner tonight? Can we have spaghetti? Or ooh, what about your good ol' famous stew?" Coil cried out towards the latter, whose eyebrow twitched in slight annoyance, a bicker slowly starting up as Skateboard sighed.
Welp, at least he had Astrobox to talk to as those two squabbled like a fierce cat going against an enraged puppy... Boombox would probably be laughing and teasing both of them by now... Wait.
"Guys, if we didn't see Boombox all day, where the hell is he?!"
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"Huh... Who's that guy that looks like me?" He mumbled as he shifted his position on his couch. Eyes burning as nose stuffed as a mug of hot chamomile tea sat untouched on the table. His flu was really catching up to him, huh?