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Mara woke up to the afternoon sun streaming through her window. Glancing at the clock, she cursed herself for forgetting to set an alarm. It was still summer, and it wasn’t like she had anywhere to be, but she still didn’t like missing half the day because her internal clock never seemed to go back to normal after being at school.
She absently reached to the side of the bed for her wheelchair before remembering it wasn’t there anymore. It was strange how sometimes she still forgot. Mara braced herself as she moved to a sitting position, cursing herself again for forgetting to set her clothes by the bed like she meant to.
Her feet felt like they were being stabbed with millions of needles as the same burning stabbing sensation rushed up her legs and into her back. She leaned on her nightstand for support as she desperately tried to keep herself upright. On shaking legs, Mara made her way to the closet and gently tossed her favorite long skirt and shirt onto the bed. Trying to force her ankles and feet to straighten. Pushing her weight backwards onto her heels, not her toes, and nearly losing her balance in the process.
As Mara sat down on the bed to get dressed, the pain subsided a little, but her lower back still burned. She sucked in deep breaths and tried to focus on the bedroom around her. She tried to remind herself that she was at home with her family.
She wasn’t at school.
She wasn’t stuck in the infirmary as her spine was slowly forced to reconnect itself. Even now, she barely dared blink because the minute she closed her eyes, she would be right back there.
Her first week at Hogwarts should have been exciting. It should have been a time to celebrate. She should have been decorating her dorm room, making friends, and exploring a magical castle with all the other Muggleborns thrust into this brand new world together.
Instead, she spent it on her back in a hospital bed, unable to move, in excruciating pain as her nerves rewrote and rearranged themselves as parts of her body that had no sensation before screamed as they were forced to reactivate. Thousands of signals she no longer remembered how to interpret all sounded off at once as she couldn’t even begin to express what was wrong.
It’s not like they would have listened anyway.
No one listened when she told them her legs were weak, that she had been in a wheelchair for five years at that point. No one cared the first time she tried to stand and immediately collapsed to the floor. No one cared when it took her weeks to learn to keep her balance again. No one cared when she had to climb all those stairs every single day, even though she could barely take one step.
Still, it’s not like she had a choice. Even getting her school supplies had been almost impossible. The wizarding world didn’t really have room for disabilities, and why would it? They could cure almost anything, so why bother?
Her dad had to carry her into Ollivander’s to get her wand. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have even made it past the doorway. She had to guess what robe size she was and try them all on at home, only for them to constantly get stuck in the wheels of her chair.
They really should have asked more questions when the school assured them it wouldn’t be a problem.
She had no idea when they got rid of her chair. It must have been at some point when she was in the infirmary, but she had no idea when. All she got was a confused look when she asked for crutches. She thought she would get it back when the school year was over. How else was she supposed to explain how she was suddenly walking again, years after being told it would never happen?
She should have asked more questions when they told her not to worry about it.
Mara glanced around as she walked into the bathroom. Even now, she wasn’t over how different everything looked. All of the bars were gone, so was the shower chair; they even moved the sink higher to match her height. Any evidence that she had ever been disabled was gone. Her parents didn’t remember; no one in her town did.
Every photo showed her standing, walking, as if the accident had never happened at all. No one understood why all of a sudden, she never wanted to go out anymore. Her parents even brought her to a doctor to see if something was wrong with her legs.
Of course, they found nothing. They only saw a little less muscle tone than average because she had spent a year forced to walk on them. In the end, they all just decided it was a cry for attention and to just ignore it until she stopped. When that didn’t work, they all assumed she was being stuck-up. She had spent a year at a fancy boarding school, and now she thought she was better than them.
None of her old friends would talk to her anymore. It wasn’t like she could explain it to them. She couldn’t even tell her own parents about what happened to her at that school.
As Mara walked around the house gathering her things, she thought about how unfair it all was. No one gave her a choice in what school she went to. No one even bothered to tell her what would happen when she got there.
No one there got why she was upset. She was getting the chance to walk again. How could that possibly be a bad thing? They were doing her a favor.
They told her she was ungrateful.
She was being a brat.
She had been just fine before. Why did she have to change just to be allowed there? With all of their magic, surely they could have enchanted her wheelchair. Surely they could have found a way to accommodate her. Surely they could have asked her what would have helped her the most.
But that was just it.
They never asked.
They never cared.
Going home should have been better. At least then she could be with her family and her old friends, but now that was ruined, too. At least her friends back at Hogwarts knew about what happened to her. If Becca hadn’t been there to help her, Mara wasn't sure if she would have gotten through the first semester at all. If it weren’t for her roommates, Mara wasn’t sure if she could have forced herself to go back. Even if it was painful and unfair, at least the people who did this to her knew that something had been done at all.
As Mara sat down on the couch for a break, she wondered if they did that on purpose. Did they deliberately make home worse so she wouldn’t fight coming back?
No, no, that was dumb.
They were just doing what they had to do to keep her secret. She should be grateful that they decided to help her. She should be happy that she got to walk again. So many people would kill for the chance she got.
“Mara,” her mom called from the kitchen, “Are you almost ready?”
“Yeah, Mom,” she called back before pulling herself back to a standing position.
Her dad wasn’t home; she was sure that was intentional. Her mom was definitely not helping her as much as she could have. Mara cringed as her back and hips ached from the strain of loading the car.
“Oh, stop it,” her mother chided, “Or I’ll make you do all of this yourself and give you something to complain about.”
“Sorry,” Mara mumbled.
She tried to keep a straight face until everything else was in the car, even as her legs burned and her feet felt like they might bleed. Tomorrow, she would have to go back to Diagon Alley, but this time she would be walking.
It was going to suck.
She hoped Becca or Chloe would be there, but they probably wouldn’t. Even if they were, they would have their own shopping to do. At least her parents were dropping her off this time. She would have to do it all herself, but at least she wouldn’t get yelled at every time she needed a break.
Finally, she went back to her room and collapsed into bed, realizing she had forgotten to lay out her clothes next to the bed. She thought about getting them now, but decided against it. She was already tired and aching all over her body. Tomorrow was going to be painful; the whole school year would be.
She couldn’t wait to go back.