Work Text:
Year 1
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for everything that I did, for everyone I had hurt, I'm sorry Enoch, I'm sorry everyone… this is my punishment…
Year 5
It's so weird, just swimming without a body, this is probably what kelp feels, just staying, unmoving, surrounded by water… Thought-water? Does Cogito even count as water?
Swimming, and swimming…
Year 10
Wait, what's my name again? I don't think it's matters anyway, after all, it's not like I will ever be free, not until he finishes his plan anyway
What was I even thinking? Of course, I want to live, it's just, I was so in despair, I wasn't thinking straight and now, well, he did do what I asked for… I was such an idiot
Year 50
I don't remember my mother’s face, I don't remember my family, I don't remember if I had a family, or I was just always stuck here, but at least project is working
They all probably miss me, and I miss them too, and I don't even have a body to say anything, but at least, all I can do is watch
Year 100
I made so many Abnormalities, they are kinda scary, kinda creepy, but they are mine, they are like kids for me
I wonder what they think about me?
Do they know I exist…
And...
I wonder what Angela feels about me? Angela, my wonderful girl, my daughter, I'm so sorry I can't show love to you, that you are forced to play the script, I'm so sorry
Year 500
And another one bites the dust, what was his name? Joshua? Jeremy? One of those
I remember there was a loop where everyone were named Joshua, I think it happened because of one of my children, Joshua, Joshua, Joshua
Really funny name to think about
Year 1000
Everyone are so prone to hurting each other, killing each other, when people are cornered, they would do everything for themselves
One Sin and Hundred of Good Deeds… one of my first children, thought of if you want to help people, you need to make sacrifices, you need to allow yourself to hurt somebody, if it can help you to do good deeds
Maybe this thought is right, maybe my junior was right in his plan, maybe it's all worth it, you need to hurt another if you want to get what you want
Year 5000
I'm so tired of my children, any children here to get hurt, Angela, you don't deserve any of this
Children, I'm so tired to see how you are all so defenseless, how you all get hurt so much, how you trust somebody, and then this trust only gets broken, what is the point of trusting others anyway, what is the point of helping? You will only get betrayed, only get hurt, I wish you tried to help yourself, I wish I could have help you, I wish you were as strong as my children that I gave birth to
Year 10000
What is even the point of helping anyone else, people are selfish, they can't, they wouldn't help anyone else, so why do they themselves not flourish, not bloom like roses? Why not only care about yourself, if you are absolutely sure in your conviction, no one can hurt you anymore, you will be strong enough to protect yourself, then none of my children can get hurt anymore, then they can paint a beautiful world with their own colors, they deserve to be strong, so they wouldn't feel pain anymore, if whole world would be like that
Then no one will get hurt anymore, so that no one will cry