Chapter Text
Regina George was no idiot. She might not have been the smartest person in school, God forbid she become like one of those Mathlete nerds, but she did have an attentive eye, something she prided herself on. She wouldn’t admit it, but Regina was an avid people watcher.
It was an easy hobby to come across at North Shore High School, an environment so thoroughly divided that each student who stepped foot across the threshold would soon be classified into one of the indivisible cliches. Didn’t matter if you were a jock or an art dork, you’d be given a cliche like a label and it would stick forever.
And Regina loved it. Well, who wouldn’t love it when you’re at the top? People watching was her favorite activity to do at lunch when Gretchen was yapping on about something Regina could have honestly cared less about. Instead of listening, Regina was observing. Her eyes followed the emo kids as they skulked around the parameters of the lunch room, then flicked hungrily towards the football jocks hollering obnoxiously at their table across the room. Regina devoured the sight of the bitchy Asian girls texting on their phones, their hair almost as flawless as her own. From the vintage fashion wannabees or the swim team, Regina couldn’t help but be fascinated at the disgusting, animated specimens around her.
“What do you think, Regina?” Gretchen’s pitchy voice cut through Regina’s observations, bringing her back to their lunch table. Gretchen and Karen fixed her with expectant eyes, eager to hear her opinion. Except Regina didn’t have one.
“Say again?” Regina straightened in her chair, pretending to have misheard her.
“What do you think I should do?” Gretchen asked again. “About Jason?”
Ugh, this again, Regina resisted the intense urge to roll her eyes. Of course Gretchen was wasting air talking about that loser.
“Cut him off and find someone else,” Regina gave a nonchalant shrug. “There are a hundred guys less skeevy than Jason.” Then she’d finally shut up about him.
“But he’s sweet,” Gretchen whined, a sound that made Regina want to rip her hoop earrings out of her head and shove them point-first into Gretchen’s eyes. “Besides, who else would I date?”
Anyone, Regina wanted to grind out, but Karen beat her to it.
“What about that guy?” The ditsy blond pointed behind Regina, bringing all three girls’ attention towards the other side of the lunchroom.
Ah yes, Regina fixed her gaze on a lanky boy with wild dark hair and a stupid grin on his face. The wannabe rock star.
Gretchen sniffed, her eyebrows pinched so close together they creased in the middle of her forehead. “Who even is that?”
“I think he’s new,” Karen sighed out an answer. “Rodger Heffman.”
Rodrick Heffley, Regina corrected, but she’d never say it out loud. Regina knew everyone at North Shore, and yes, that included the new kid, Rodrick. She’d seen him around school, loitering in the hallways, sneaking out of class early to sit in his ugly white van. They even shared a class together, fourth period Chemistry, but Rodrick spent most of that time scribbling in his notebook or playing the drums with his pencils.
He was exactly the kind of sketchy loser Regina avoided sharing air with at all cost. With an eyeroll and a flick of her perfect blonde hair, Regina turned back around to face Karen.
“If Gretchen wants to smell like weed and Super Senior, then yeah, Karen, he’d be a great choice!” The sarcasm was predictably lost on the other blonde, who grinned at her supposed accomplishment.
“Whatever, we better motor before the bell rings,” Regina sighed, picking at the remains of her half-eaten lunch. The last thing Regina wanted was to be caught in the throng of frantic high schoolers who’d clearly never used a stick of deodorant in their life as they all escaped the cafeteria.
As the girls packed up their belongings, Regina gave one last glance at Rodrick. He wasn’t as horrible to look at as most of the other guys at school, but the idea of Gretchen, or anyone, purposefully dating him was enough to make her stomach roil. She had a sick image of sitting inside of Rodrick’s van, trash and dubious magazines littering the no-doubt sticky surface. She stifled a horrified laugh, banishing the thought from her mind.
She’d send Gretchen after one of the uglier football players and focus her own attention on someone who’d be easily malleable, someone who definitely didn’t wear eyeliner to school.
With a final grin, one she kept to herself, Regina led her Plastics out of the lunch room, thoughts of her beautiful convertible running through her mind.
…
Rodrick Heffley was never one for school. From the moment he could remember being dropped off at school, he had hated it. He’d been endlessly bored at the lectures, then the lectures about zoning out, then the lectures for skipping class, blah blah blah, it all came back to him being talked at.
No matter where he went, school was always the same. When he’d moved to North Shore at the start of the year, he’d been unsurprised to find that the teachers were just as boring, the classes just as uninspiring, the walls just as enclosing as before.
What he had noticed was the people. Never before had he seen so many high school stereotypes under one roof. It was actually kind of sick, and made navigating a new school way easier. Clearly, he avoided the sports fanatics, opting for the alternative, punk crowd that he seamlessly slipped into. Among his fellow class skippers, Rodrick found it remarkably easy to drift through the school days without putting in any effort at all.
Just how he liked it.
Lunch was always his favorite subject, had been throughout his entire academic stint, and while the food sucked and the cafeteria was packed, Rodrick was entirely at ease. He thrummed a beat onto his leg, humming a tune he’d been working on for his band, half-listening to whatever his friends were saying. Something about their favorite punk bands, a topic they often frequented that never failed to result in a heated argument. He grinned as his whole table predictably erupted in discourse, momentarily lifting his gaze to realize that Regina George was looking at him.
All at once, Rodrick’s body froze up, completely on edge. Regina, with her smooth skin, sly eyes, deceiving mouth, was looking at him. What had he done to earn her attention? Just as quickly as he’d noticed her gaze, Regina and her Plastic lackeys turned back around, leaving him rigid and bewildered.
Had she noticed that he noticed her looking at him? Was she actually looking at him or at someone else, and he was freaking himself out for no reason? If she was looking at him, why?
Probably making fun of you, he told himself. There’s no way the hottest girl in school was actually looking at you for any other reason.
He laughed nervously, trying to clear his mind from the questions that clung to him, the tune he’d been humming long lost to the void. Still, even though he knew that a cockroach stood a better chance with Regina than him, Rodrick couldn’t help but stare at the back of Regina’s perfect head. He’d noticed her before (of course he had, he had eyes, didn’t he?) but it was always a passing glance in chemistry or in the parking lot as she zoomed away from school in her expensive convertible. He’d never actually thought he’d have a chance with her, so why even entertain the thought?
But it was weird, right? Weird that Regina would suddenly look at him, that she’d meet his eyes for a split second, without knowing the sudden and indescribable reaction just her gaze had on him.
Dude, can it, Rodrick’s inner voice groaned at him. It sounds like you’re writing in Greg’s stupid diary.
“You good?” His friend Kyle asked from beside Rodrick, bumping him on the arm.
“Yeah,” Rodrick slumped back into his seat, feigning a nonchalance he definitely did not possess. “Just thinking about next period.”
Fourth period Chemistry. The one class he shared with Regina George. Rodrick hated the way his heart raced at the thought of seeing her again, of her looking at him again. Regina, with her lip gloss and miniskirts, her observant eyes and cutting words. She was a million light years out of his league, but who knew what could happen?
Rodrick watched as Regina and her brainless friends packed up their lunches, and for a split second, Rodrick swore that Regina looked back over at him. The mere thought made him feel something he’d never felt before, never thought was possible for him to feel - Rodrick was excited about his next class.