Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Susie stood in front of her apartment building. The wind quietly swept up some of her hair. The only noise that could be heard was the soft dribble of water coming from a nearby drainpipe. At least, that’s what noises her ears could perceive. Internally, her mind was racing with noise and thought. The prophecy, the Knight, the church, Undyne, Kris, Toriel, it was all a giant swirling mess inside her mind. She stood there, looking at the entrance to her building, her feet frozen to the spot. She was alone, and she hated it. Almost as much as she hated admitting she needed someone by her side right now. In her dilapidated apartment, she would find no comfort, of that she was sure. Infrequent water droplets started to come down more and more as the rain began to pick up again. If she didn’t go inside soon she’d be soaked in no time. But going back up there, in the state that she was in? She wouldn’t. She couldn’t.

“Screw this.” she hissed under her breath. Turning away from her building, she put her hands in her pockets and began walking towards the school.

There were three people who came into her mind when she thought of those she could turn to. Firstly, and the least likely to be able to assist in this situation, was Noelle. That was an obvious no-go for several reasons, not least of which being the fact that her mom hated Susie. There was no way she was going to let her back into their house after what happened earlier that day. It felt strange to think that it had happened mere hours ago, and even stranger to think how much it had hurt Susie in the moment. After everything she’d just experienced, she’d almost forgotten about it completely. Noelle, for her part, was cool to be around and someone Susie felt would help her in a desperate time like this. But, at the same time, there was something off about her that she couldn’t quite pinpoint. It was something about the way she talked about Kris when Susie had asked her about that photo. She seemed so willing to throw Kris under the bus and say they were “just neighbors". But Susie wasn’t dumb, she knew what friendship was and those two had it. Or, at least, they did once. It bothered her.

Next on the list was Kris. Not happening. She’d just left their place because of Toriel and that skeleton guy. Going back to them felt pointless now, especially if it meant she’d have to see those two again. Thinking about Kris gave her a pang of horrible guilt. She saw it in their expression when they came into the house. They were no happier with what they were seeing than she was. It was more than that, though. Susie thought they’d be surprised, shocked, maybe even angry. But they weren’t. The expression on their face was one of deep sadness and disappointment. Like this wasn’t the first time they’d come home to a drunk mom. She knew what that was like, seeing someone she looked up to turn into such a mess. It was a betrayal, a knife to the back of your expectations. She’d seen it in other adults in her life, but she never expected that Toriel could be the same way. Someone so kind, so nurturing, so loving. That she too could fall into such an obvious trap of bad parenting, it broke something inside Susie. After all the heartbreak and terror of the church, it felt like a twist of the knife. She thought that she could stand up to anything after all the things she’s been through. Turns out that all it takes is a reminder of how disappointing reality can be to make you realize how much the fantasy of the dark worlds beats it. And Kris, poor Kris. She felt awful about leaving them there. But at the same time she knew that if she’d stayed, it would have been worse for both of them.

Lastly, there was Ralsei. Susie had been thinking a lot about the prince lately. About what his motives are, about how he sees himself, and about his place in her world. He had pure intentions as far as she could tell. He was kind, understanding, and friendly, but those qualities only seemed to extend to lightners. Where darkners were concerned, he seemed all too willing to disregard them and their feelings, his own included. But even when he did that, she could see in his eyes that he wasn’t happy about it. It was like he didn’t really want to treat them the way he did, but to treat them any other way would be wrong. She hoped that she’d convinced him otherwise over their last two adventures, but that remained to be seen. He’d told both her and Kris several times that Castle Town was meant to be a place to retreat to. That if they ever needed to get away from it all, it would be there as a safety net. She figured that if there was ever a time for her to take advantage of such an offer, it was now.

But the most shocking thing she found herself thinking about with regards to the prince is how much she finds herself attracted to him. It had started in Card Castle, after they’d beaten King. She and Kris were about to depart when Ralsei removed his hat. It was the first time she’d really been able to see his face and she was surprised to find how cute she thought he was. For most of her life, Susie had only ever been attracted to other girls. So when the prince revealed himself, it gave her questions she never thought to ask about herself. It wasn’t just his face, though. In Cyber City, the two of them had gone off on their own to explore and see the sights. It wasn’t for too long, but the time they spent together felt really nice. He was excited to be going places with her, happy to be in her presence, and he was even able to teach her a bit of healing magic. She’d never met someone who was so genuinely happy to be hanging out with her before. He was such a dork. So uptight, so proper, so polite. Normally, she’d hate someone like that. She’d wish they could just take the stick out of their ass and enjoy themselves. Cause a little trouble, be bad, let loose. But when it was him that did it, she couldn’t see him being any other way. That’s just how Ralsei was, and she didn’t mind it. If anything, she liked it.

Unfortunately, the church had complicated things somewhat. She’d seen a new side to him. Seen that his prim and proper mask hid scars that ran deep. He’d kept things from her, from Kris. Things that were important and could shape their entire futures. She didn’t like that he did that, but just like when he talked to darkners about their irrelevance, she could tell that he wished he didn’t have to. He had that same hollow expression of empty happiness, that same fake tone of indifference, that same uncomfortable shifting in his posture. He hated having to lie to his friends, but he did it for their sake. Or at least, that’s what she hoped was his motivation. Even after all that, though, she still felt a pull towards him. An inexplicable desire to be with him. Maybe that was just his charm, or maybe she was going soft.

On her walk over to the school, the rain had started coming down hard. By the time she made it inside, she was already drenched. The heavy feeling of her wet clothes matched the heavy feeling of loneliness in her heart. She’d never really felt at home in Hometown. The people were afraid of her, there was nothing to do, and she didn’t have any friends before a few days ago. Castle Town felt much more like a proper home to her. A place where everyone knew her name and was friendly with her. She made her way over to the supply closet, trying her best to not slip on the tile floor. Upon entering Castle Town, all was quiet and she was annoyed to find that her clothes and hair remained wet. The funky music which had previously been emanating from the cafe was absent and all of the darkners were nowhere to be seen. It was strange, she’d never considered that darkners had to sleep. Where did they sleep, anyway? Were some of the buildings she’d never entered their homes? Hotels or bunk rooms maybe? Her thoughts were automatically replaced with the continuous swirling from before.

As Susie approached the stairs to the main castle, she noticed Seam stood outside their seap, idly sweeping away with a broom. The ragged fortune teller was still something of an enigma to her. They didn’t seem to have bad intentions, but the way they spoke about the future and their adventures rubbed her the wrong way. They looked up as Susie approached.

“Huh…” they croaked, “You’re alone.”

“That weird?” she said.

“I’ve only ever seen you come here with the prince and the cage. I don’t believe I’ve seen you here by yourself before.”

“Don’t call them that.”

“Hm?”

“They have names. Ralsei and Kris. They aren’t “the prince” and “the cage”, they’re people. With names.”

Seam was silent for a moment. Then, they let out a low chuckle. “Of course. How could I forget? My apologies.” They were clearly mocking her.

Susie wasn’t in the mood to fight, otherwise she would absolutely get into a shouting match right then and there. “Where’s Ralsei?” she asked.

Seam pointed towards the castle. “Up there, last I saw.”

Wordlessly, Susie returned to her original path. As she passed, Seam mumbled something under their breath. She looked back at them, but they simply stared off into space, ignoring her.

“You got something to say?”

They barely acknowledged her, only looking at her through their periphery. “Nothing you’d like to hear, I reckon…”

She brushed it off. If they were going to be so goddamn cryptic, she wasn’t interested. She continued up the stairs.

Like the rest of the town, the castle was dead quiet. There were no darkners at the entrance to greet her as she walked inside. The interior was empty as it had always been. Not even the sound of Queen’s incessant mix-tape could be heard. She made her way up to the third floor, past Queen’s and Tenna’s rooms until finally arriving at the unassuming green door. Like before, she felt frozen. Her mind still buzzed with the traumatic events of the past few hours. She knew she wasn’t the only one hurting. She could just go home. She didn’t need to make her problems his. She’s strong enough to tough this out on her own. Isn’t she? She stood there, a feeling of uncertainty welling up inside her. Her head hurt and she was exhausted. Maybe this was a bad idea after all. She began to turn away, but just as she did, she heard something from the other side of the door. She put her ear up to it and from the other side she heard quiet sobbing. It was Ralsei, she had no doubt about that. She wasn’t going to abandon another friend in need. Not now, not ever again. Renewed with purpose, she gently opened the door and saw the prince huddled in a corner bawling his eyes out.
He didn’t even seem to notice she’d entered. Quietly, she closed the door behind her and walked over to Ralsei. Seeing him in this state broke her heart. She wanted to scoop him up and hug the sadness away. Give him all the strength she had so that he would be able to fight whatever it was he was battling. But her own willpower was sapped. For now, all she could manage was a simple,

“Hey.”

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The walk back was always the worst part. He’d only experienced it four times so far, but each one seemed worse than the last. The wasteland of the space in between dark worlds seemed to stretch on forever. Ralsei sometimes wondered what was out there. If he chose a direction and started walking, would there be anything to find? Signs of life outside of designated dark worlds? He assumed that such things were impossible, but as his adventures with Kris and Susie had gone on, he was beginning to question whether he truly knew all there was to know about the dark world. Thankfully, he was able to navigate the wasteland with relative ease. There were no enemies to get in his way and he was able to sense in which direction Castle Town was relative to anywhere else. But it wasn’t the possibility of danger or getting lost that made the trek difficult. It was the silence. No sound permeated in the wasteland, not even the sound of his footsteps. It was an empty void with nothing to distract him from his thoughts. Before last night, his mind went to places of levity after the adventure had concluded. He had the pleasure of looking back at the growth Susie had made after Card Kingdom. He felt a sense of relief having told the lightners about the Roaring and its consequences after Cyber City. But after TV world? That time had been different.

Ralsei knew what was coming. He knew the Knight would show itself and cut Tenna down before the heroes could save him. And there was nothing he did to try to save him. Susie’s speech to the gameshow host just after they’d defeated him was difficult to hear. He’d hoped against hope that she would abandon the idea of them remaining friends after their adventures were concluded. He’d hoped that she’d see how things were supposed to be. If for no other reason, then to spare herself the pain of having to mourn him once he was gone. Such hopes were foolish, even in the moment he knew that. She was never going to change her mind on darkners, or on him. There was some gratification in that, but there was also fear. Fear for how she would react after everything was said and done. He cared for her, that he could never deny. So the thought of the emotional turmoil she will inevitably grapple with made him feel guilt. Guilt for allowing her to get attached. Guilt for trying to understand her. Guilt for wanting to be her friend. Those thoughts of guilt roiled around in his head as he made his way through the wasteland after Kris and Susie had sealed the fountain to TV world. Little did he know that that had merely been the tip of the iceberg.

He was making his way back to Castle Town now, nearing the outskirts. He felt horrible. For lying to his friends. For wanting to even be their friend in the first place. He couldn’t help but think about Susie. How she acted after smashing the ending panel. She seemed despondent. In shock or denial. Like she was wearing a mask to cover her true feelings. He knew what that looked like all too well. The way she’d smiled at him. He’d almost burst into tears right then and there. To think that someone like her, someone so strong, courageous, and kind would be reduced to a shadow. It made his chest hurt. Ralsei’s mind was occupied by many thoughts of Susie these days. Thoughts of how much he cared for her and how much he hoped she cared for him. Her smile was like a lighthouse in a fog of deepest darkness. She was rude and loud and violent, but there was something endearing about that. Even her most irritating qualities were unmistakably her. There was a part of him that wished he could be more like Susie. More confident, more bombastic, more forceful. But then, that wouldn’t be authentic to who he really was. In the end, he supposed what he really wanted was to be able to be more like himself. Whenever she was around, he felt more capable of showing his true feelings. She lent him the strength that he didn’t have, and he would never be able to repay her for that kindness. Every time she left, it felt like the room became just that little bit darker. Her radiance went with her as she confidently strode away. He tried to burn these thoughts away whenever they arose.

You’re the lonely prince. He told himself. That is your role. Stop pretending like you deserve anything else. All you are doing is hurting yourself and them. You know how this ends. You know how this all ends.

He told Kris that he wanted to hope things can change. This wasn’t necessarily a lie, but it felt almost impossible for him to think that the prophecy was anything but set in stone. By the time he’d reached Castle Town, it had gotten very late. His feet ached and his eyes hurt. He wanted to lie down and never get up. What few darkners were about ignored him as he walked to the castle gate. In his naivety, he’d hoped that one of them may approach him and ask if he was alright. He certainly wasn’t hiding the fact that he was not in a good mood. But, evidently, he wasn’t worth their time. Nothing new there, he supposed. He passed Seam on his way up the steps to the castle. They were shuffling down the steps supported by a walking stick covered in bells and other mystical trinkets.
The fortune teller bowed their head in greeting. “Your highness…”

“Hello, Seam.” Ralsei replied. He really didn’t want to talk to them right now. He just wanted to go back to his room and rest. But as the prince of Castle Town, he felt a responsibility to tend to his subjects. “You really don’t need to call me that, just “Ralsei” is fine.”

“I would not dishonor you by ignoring your royal title, my prince.”

“Heh, o-of course…”

“Although, if I may be so bold, your highness. It would appear that you have a bit of… blood on your face.” They tapped their cheek.

Ralsei touched his face and was met with a sticky, wet feeling. He had entirely forgotten that Susie had touched him with her bleeding hand. If this were any other night, he’d rush off to find some way to clean himself up, but he didn’t have the capacity for that now. He needed to lie down, even if it meant his fur would be permanently stained.

“T-thank you, Seam. I’d forgotten about that.”

“Think nothing of it, your highness.”

They turned and continued on their way down the stairs. He really didn’t like being called “your highness” or “my prince”. All it could make him think about was the prophecy and his place in it. Such titles were a reminder of his lack of agency in his own life. He didn’t expect Seam to know that, though. He wondered if he told them, would they even care? They were a standout among the residents of Castle Town, even among the stranger darkners they’d recruited. Obsessed with fate, the future, and the futility of everything. They reminded Ralsei of himself in some way. What he would be like if he truly gave up. Apathetic to the goings on of the world around him and the people in it because he knew that fate was impossible to change.

He entered the castle, its cold stone interior was little comfort. It made him long for warmth. For the warmth of another. By the Angel, he was lonely. His mind spiraled as he made his way to his room. Pressure built behind his eyes as a hollow feeling engulfed him. His feet felt encased in concrete and he struggled to keep going. Every step felt like he was running a marathon. After much effort, he finally made it to his room. His empty, sad, lonely room. It was fitting, really. A room and its decorations were supposed to reflect the one that lived in it. He moved over to the back wall and slid down it. He curled his knees up to his chest and let the tears flow.

Penance. This is what this was. Penance for how he’d lied to those he cared for most. Penance for hoping he could be anything more than a helpful tool. Penance for not shutting up and accepting his place. The Angel, or whichever other omnipotent force watched over him, was punishing him for his insolence. It didn’t feel fair that what he thought were acts of kindness would reward him such feelings of despair. He wanted to feel something, anything other than the intense longing to be seen and heard. To be appreciated and loved. To have friends. But those feelings had been with him since the moment he came into existence. They would never go away, he knew that. And so he was destined to be trapped in a cycle of disappointment and pain for the rest of time. Such a cruel existence had surely been conjured on purpose. Was he the favored punching bag of whichever God oversaw his world? Was he a court jester for prophecy to point and laugh at? Or had he merely been cursed with the worst luck imaginable by an indifferent universe? He didn’t know, but he wanted it to stop. He wanted everything to stop. The pain, the tears, the thoughts. He just wanted to curl up and disappear. Maybe then, his friends would finally understand how they should always have seen him.

“Hey.”

He looked up, startled by the sudden intrusion. It was Susie. She stood over him, a sad expression on her face.

“S-S-Susie…” he sniffled. He wiped the tears from his face with his sleeve and stood up. The mask put back on his face, he gave her a half-hearted smile. “How can I help you…?”

She was still for a moment, clearly thinking to herself about how to proceed. She removed her damp vest and moved closer to the prince. He stepped back as she attempted to put her free hand on his unbloodied cheek.

“W-what are you doing?”

“Hold still. Just gotta wash this off.”

He did as he was told and allowed her to hold his head in place. She began wiping away the blood with her vest. Ralsei put a hand on her wrist.

“Susie, y-you don’t have to-”

“Zip it. It’s my blood, right?” her tone was mirthless. “I put it there, I should clean it up.”

“...Very well.” He let his hand hang at his side and allowed her to continue.

She looked so serious, so focused. Like cleaning his face was the only thing on her mind. Having her hand against his face felt so, so, so nice. Nicer than anything he’d ever felt before. Her warmth made him sleepy, like he could use her hand as a pillow and would get the best night of rest he’d ever have. But those same thoughts from before barged their way through the pleasant sensation.

This isn’t right. You know it isn’t. You know how this ends. You know you can’t have these feelings for her. That pleasure isn’t meant for you.

He leaned into her hand and he could feel more tears coming. The warmth wasn’t enough to bury the feelings of self-hatred for long. They began to trickle down his cheeks and fall onto her hands. She didn’t pay it any mind. She was solely focused on cleaning him. Everything else was outside noise she could ignore. After a minute or so, the stain was removed. Ralsei’s fur was returned to its pristine white, albeit somewhat darkened by the water from both his eyes and her vest.

“There,” She moved her hands away and Ralsei’s cheek felt all the colder for it. “Better?”

He touched his face and felt his wet fur. No blood remained. “T-Thank you, Susie…” tears still streamed down his face.

There was an awkward silence between the two. Ralsei breathed and let the tears dry up. The silence stretched on for an uncomfortable amount of time. It was the prince who broke it.

“Um… I’m assuming you didn’t come here just to clean my cheek?”

“ …Nah.”

“Oh… alright. W-What brings you here, then?”

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What was she doing? Why was this so hard? All she wanted was to be there with him. She didn’t need anything else. She just couldn’t find the words. And his sad room really wasn’t helping.

“I, uh… I need to talk with you. About stuff. But not here. We should go down to my room.”

“Oh! Um, sure! I-If that’s what you want.”

Thank God. She couldn’t stand being in his room. It made her depressed just being there. Wordlessly, they went downstairs to Susie’s custom room. It had since been separated from Kris’s, no longer being big enough to house the table and tea set. She liked it that way, though. She kicked off her boots and unbuckled her arm belts. She threw her now blood stained vest on the floor and sat down on the bed. It was much comfier than the one she had in the light world. This one didn’t have springs. Instead, it felt like some kind of foam substance. She sank into it as she sat. She let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding in. Looking up, Ralsei stood over her.

“The hell are you doing?”

“Hm? Uh… nothing?”

She patted the space next to her.

Ralsei blushed. “Oh, t-that’s ok, Susie! It’s your bed and I wouldn’t want to-”

“I’m not talking to you if you’re gonna stand over me. Sit.” She looked away, “Please…”

After a moment more of hesitation, he complied and sat next to her.

“O-Oh…!”

“What?”

“Nothing, it’s just… I didn’t realize how comfortable it was.”

“ …You made this whole thing, but never tested it out?”

“Well… it wasn’t meant for me. It was meant for you. Only you.”

If there was one thing she hated about Ralsei, it was this. His insistent need to give absolutely nothing to himself. Anything and everything had to be for his friends. His room was a perfect example of that. She looked around at hers. She tried to imagine how much thought and care would need to go into making a room as cool as hers. It was pretty much perfect. It was everything she liked all in one place. Such a task would be impossible for someone like her to do alone. But for Ralsei? He literally did this over the course of a single night for two different people. He could do all that for them, but he couldn’t put in even a quarter of the same effort for himself? It made her irrationally angry. Like she just wanted to slap him silly for even thinking he wasn’t worth it.

“Bullshit.” she said. “First thing I’m doing the next time we get a break is getting you a bed like this. I bet Seam’d have a mattress somewhere in that seap of theirs."

“O-Oh, that’s ok Susie, you don’t-”

“You can’t talk me out of it, dude. It’s already happening whether you like it or not.” She looked at him, more serious now. “I’m sick of you not treating yourself the way you treat us. You deserve to be happy, Ralsei, no matter how much you might think the opposite.”

He looked at the floor, defeated. He didn’t look happy or excited or even surprised that she was so determined to do something for him. He just looked sad. That wasn’t the reaction she was expecting.

“Why were you crying?” she asked. Straight to the point, no beating around the bush. She was sick of trying to think of clever ways of getting to that topic. She just needed to know if he was ok, and more importantly, how she could help if he wasn’t.

“Heh. Don’t worry, Susie. I-I’m ok.” He gave her the fakest smile she’d ever seen. It was almost insulting how unconvincing he was being.

“Ralsei,” she chided. “I thought we were over this. We literally just talked about being more honest with each other, remember? And now you’re giving me this? I know you, dude. Hell, even if I didn’t, you’ve been crying basically the whole time I’ve been here.”

He looked even more depressed. His lips quivered and the corners of his eyes filled with tears again.

Shit, no! Stop making it worse, dumbass!

“L-Look, what I’m trying to say…” she gently placed her hand over his. “ …Is that you don’t have to pretend for my sake, ok? I want you to be honest with me. I want you to feel like you can come to me for help. But… I can’t be there for you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.”

He looked up at her. God but his eyes were so pretty.

“I…” he took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, Susie. I’m sorry I lied to you. I’m sorry you saw what you saw. I’m sorry that you’re stuck with me. I’m sorry that I’m such an awful friend.”

She didn’t say anything. Instead, she wrapped her arm around his shoulders and pulled him in for a hug.
“I forgive you.”

“W-What…?”

“I forgive you. For lying. What you did was wrong, I won’t try to deny that. But I know why you did it, and I think you deserve to be forgiven.”

He was quiet for a second. She heard him sniffle, then say “Thank you…”

“But all that other stuff? That’s a load of crap and you know it.” She cupped his face in her hands. “You aren’t an awful friend. You’re an amazing friend, probably the best one I’ve ever had. You’re patient, and nice, and… you gave me a second chance.”

“Susie…”

“Listen. When we first met, I was such an asshole. To you, to Kris, to everyone, really. I was scared and I didn’t know what to do, so I defaulted to what I usually do. I tried to scare you away so that you wouldn’t hurt me. But you didn’t let that stop you from being such a cool, awesome person.” She was blushing now, her voice was beginning to break and she could feel tears forming at the corners of her eyes. “So don’t you dare say you’re anything less, cuz you’re not.”

They embraced, both crying now. It felt so good for her to cry. She couldn’t remember the last time she had. For so much of her life, Susie had to act strong and mean and scary. Wearing a mask for as long as she has gets exhausting. You forget what it’s like to not have it on, and after long enough, you forget that it’s even there in the first place. She’d been in that place before she met Ralsei and she realized that that’s why she felt such a pull to him. They both knew what it was like to wear a mask and how awful it could get to have it on non-stop. She didn’t feel like she needed it anymore, though, not since she’d met him. And she couldn’t be happier that he was in her life. But despite that, she wanted it to go further. That selfish desire for more. She didn’t want to be just friends, she wanted him on the next level. All she had to do was say it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Susie hug was a rare and special thing indeed. Ralsei soaked it up for as long as he could. Her hair, still somewhat damp from the rain, smelled like lavender. That was both fitting and surprising to him. He’d expected either no scent at all or some bizarre artificial scent that couldn’t quite be pinpointed. And yet, lavender was the most Susie-like smell he could think of. He was happy to be in her arms like this. Her strong, muscular, freckled arms. She really was much bigger than he was. It put into perspective for him how much she eclipsed him in size. She was only a head taller than him, but her shoulders were so much more broad and her hips were so much more wide. He didn’t mind, though. He imagined that this is what it must be like to sleep under a weighted blanket and he quite enjoyed the feeling. His head was against her chest. He could hear the beating of her heart. It was the most beautiful sound he’d ever heard. It reminded him that she was real. That she was there, with him, making sure he was ok. That he had a friend, a true friend, who cared ever so deeply about him. Of course, he wished he could stop crying, but she had that effect on him. They pulled away from each other, she was faintly smiling. He wished he could return it, but he just couldn't. That damn voice in the back of his head wouldn’t allow it.

Get away from her. This means nothing. She thinks she knows what she’s feeling, but she doesn’t. She’s in denial. Only you have the power to make sure this doesn’t go too far.

He was getting so tired of that voice.

“T-Thank you, Susie. You have no idea how much that means to me…”

“Yeah… well, there’s actually something else I think you should know…”

His heart skipped a beat. He had a feeling he knew where this was going and he was excited and horrified in equal measure. She wasn’t looking at him, she looked more embarrassed than he’d ever seen her before. Her purple skin had turned a shade of burgundy from all the blushing.

“I… I like you, a lot.”

He knew what that meant. Obviously he did. He wasn’t so ignorant or stupid to not be able to understand what her true intentions were. But despite that, and despite how badly he wanted to reciprocate, the looming threat of the prophecy forever limited him in his capacity for such relationships.

“I… like you too, Susie!” he deflected, hoping that would be enough for her to stop. He begged in his mind for her to not do this. He couldn’t suffer another heartbreak, not now. Not like this.

“N-No, not like that. I mean like…” she took a deep breath. “You make me feel weightless. Like I’m being lifted up by a cloud. Every second I’m with you is warmer, brighter, more fun than the last. Even like this. Even when we’re both suffering. You make me feel so special and appreciated and understood and…” she trailed off.

The prince beamed up at her. Such wonderful words… were not meant for him. He turned away, a pain in his chest as if he’d just been staked through the heart.

“Susie… I’m sorry.”

She deflated. Hanging her head, she let out a deep sigh. He wanted to immediately apologize. To take it back and throw his arms around her and tell her he felt the same. He wanted to latch onto her and never let go. He wanted to tell her everything she ever wanted to hear and more. It was physically painful for him to restrain himself. There was only so much he could endure for this damned prophecy, and he was at his limit. But it didn’t matter what he wanted. It never mattered what he wanted. His wants were secondary to the ancient tale which had defined his entire being. He felt depressed and livid and disgusted all at once. What could he have done to warrant such a cruel existence? Who had he offended that required him to suffer such an unfair fate? He tried to shove these feelings down, push them out of his mind. But they wouldn’t leave so easily. They floated now, just below the surface. With what little willpower he still had, he tried to explain himself.

“The prophecy dictates that I am the lonely prince. To stray from that-”

At the mention of the prophecy, she was suddenly animated again. She grabbed his shoulders with startling force.

“Fuck the prophecy! I don’t care what it says that you, or me, or Kris, or anybody else has to be! I won’t let some old ass story tell me how my life is supposed to go!” her breathing was heavy. She was holding back a flood of tears. “If you don’t feel the same, just say so. But if you don’t want this, if you don’t want me, because the prophecy says you shouldn’t? I won’t stand by that. You are so much more than just a character in a story, Ralsei. I won’t let you believe anything else, even if it kills me.”

He couldn’t take it anymore. He leaned forward, bringing her into a kiss. She was surprised at first, but after a moment of adjustment, their lips were locked together in sync. He began to cry, again. Great Angel, he was such a crybaby. But that didn’t matter. She was right. He felt a massive weight being lifted from his body combined with a substantial dosage of fear as he felt his heart break free of its bindings. It was a fear he wanted to face. A fear he wouldn’t back down from. He didn’t want his life to be dictated by another. He wanted to live for himself. He wanted Susie, so, so, so badly. No, even more. He needed her. No matter what direction the strings of fate pull him, no matter what road has already been paved, he would do this for himself and no one was going to stop him. She was so warm. Her lips were surprisingly tender. He needed to pull back for air, but he didn’t want this moment to end. Finally, the needs of his body won out against the needs of his heart and he had to pull away. They were both panting now, neither of them expected him to do what he’d just done.

“I want you,” he said. “Whenever I’m with you, the void of loneliness inside me is completely filled. You bring such kindness and happiness to my life. You are my guiding light through the dark, and I don’t ever want to be apart from you again.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit!

Susie couldn’t help but smile. The biggest, goofiest, most lovestruck smile she’d ever produced. Was all this real? Was she dreaming? There’s no way she heard him right. She needed to do something to make sure that she was, in fact, in reality. She grabbed him by the collar and yanked him in for another kiss. His lips tasted like marshmallows and felt just as supple. She moved her hands through his hair. It felt like she was petting a freshly washed blanket. Warm and soft and perfect in every way. Oh yes, this was real, and she was going to enjoy it as much as she possibly could. She pulled back, needing to breathe.

“I-I take it that means you're happy?” Ralsei stuttered.

“Happy?” There was a fire in her gut, an engine in her heart and it was roaring. “Nah, not yet.” She gently removed the prince’s glasses and placed them on the bedside table. Without warning, she shoved him onto the bed and his head landed safely on the pillow. She crawled on top of him, straddling his waist. Her hands were on either side of his head, forcing him to look up at her. His eyes were like beautiful pink diamonds, filled to the brim with desperation. She could tell how badly he wanted her to continue, but she wanted to tease him just that little bit more. A huntress who’d finally caught her prey, playing with her food.

“Hope you’re ready, pretty boy. Cuz I’m gonna be taking my time with you…”

His eyes widened. His face turned bright red with a nervous and excited smile spreading across it. She was able to pull off the confidence act pretty well externally, but on the inside, she had no idea what she was doing. She’d watched plenty of movies with unnecessary romantic subplots, or slasher flicks with make-out scenes just before the killer strikes, but she’d never actually done anything like this herself. She hoped she was doing all the right things, she needed to be especially careful when it came to her teeth. Sharp and numerous that they were, she didn’t want to accidentally make Ralsei bleed. She also suddenly became acutely aware of her weight. She was a big person, and putting her whole body on top of someone as small as the prince might have been a bad idea.

“I-I’m not too uh… heavy, am I?” she shifted her weight to be more on her legs so as to not crush him.

“N-No! I’m ok, Susie!”

“Cool, cool. Just don’t wanna… hurt you, y’know?” she felt an odd sense of embarrassment at admitting that.

“I… I wouldn’t mind i-if you did…”

Oh. Oh. She liked that. A lot. Something inside her clicked. A feeling of excitement like she’d never known raced up her spine like a lightning bolt through a power line. It was almost too overwhelming. Almost.

“Is that right?” she said with a devilish, toothy grin. “Well, I guess a little taste wouldn't hurt.”

She leaned down, starting with simply kissing the prince once more. After locking lips, she began fumbling with his scarf. She wanted his neck exposed for what came next. After carefully unwrapping it, she threw it unceremoniously onto the floor. Then, she began moving down. She started with simply giving the prince kisses on his cheek and jaw. She was trying her best to savor this. It was tempting for her to rush onto what she really wanted to do, but she resisted the urge. She’d made it down to his neck, and this is where the teeth came out. She began gently biting and nibbling at the skin. If there was one thing her teeth were good for, it was making puncture marks. Ralsei was softly whimpering and moaning with each bite. The noise sounded like the most beautiful music to Susie’s ears.

“S-S-Susie…” he managed. “That f-feels…”

She paused and looked up at him. If there was one thing that was at the absolute peak of her priorities right now, it was the safety and well being of Ralsei. If that meant she’d have to stop with the biting, she’d stop. No matter how badly she wanted to use him as a chew toy.
He looked down at her, flustered and panting. “Please, keep going.”

Her engine roared louder than ever. Her insides were burning to cinders and she was loving every second of it. She let out a low, dry chuckle. “God. You know just what to say, don’t you?”

She bit him all over, his collar, his neck, a few on his shoulders, she even gave him a small one on his jaw. Once she was satisfied, she sat up, admiring her work. Before her was Ralsei, so-called lonely prince of the dark, practically steaming from excitement and covered in bite marks. Her bite marks. He’d been adequately labeled as belonging to her now. Not that there were any darkners looking to take him away, but if there were, now they knew better. A dragon making sure her hoard was safe. Ralsei, for his part, still seemed to want more. There was a desperate hunger in his eyes. Like he’d been starved for days and was finally being able to feast. She was more than happy to provide.

The two of them twisted and turned in bed, their lips embraced nearly the whole time. Susie could never have imagined that making out could feel this good, especially with someone as dorky as Ralsei. Her prince had tried his best to give her his own mark of ownership. There was a moment when he was on top of her, attempting to give her hickies on her neck at her instruction. Unfortunately, her skin was too tough to bruise in any meaningful way from his mouth alone. But that hadn’t stopped it from feeling great. She got a good sense of how he smelled after spending so much time in face-sucking range. He had a very pleasant scent of cinnamon and butterscotch. It reminded her of Toriel and baking pie at Kris’s house. Earlier that night, such thoughts would have given her a feeling of anxiety, but being in her prince’s arms alleviated any ill feelings she could have.

All good things must come to an end, sadly. They both had already been exhausted before latching onto each other, so by the time they were both satisfied, they could do nothing but collapse into a heap. Ralsei laid next to Susie, his head on her chest. She had her arm wrapped around him, keeping him close. The only sound in the room was both of them panting as they came down from the high. Susie stared up into the ceiling, silently thanking whatever God was listening for allowing her to have this opportunity. There was no denying her happiness and bliss in this moment, but there was still something that irked her. As fun as this had been, it changed things. Drastically. Before tonight, they’d been good friends and nothing more. But it was kind of hard to be “just friends” with someone once you’ve mapped out their mouth with your tongue.

“Hey, Ralsei?” she said.

“Yes?” one could be excused for ever thinking her prince had been in a foul mood that same evening. He had a dreamy expression on his face that spoke of deep satisfaction. Oh, and bite marks. Couldn’t forget those.

“What uh… what now?”

He chuckled a little. “I believe we go to bed, Susie.”

“No duh. I meant like…” she had to think of how to phrase what she wanted to say. Her brain was still reforming after having been turned to mush in his arms. “What are we? Cuz I don’t know about you, but I don’t think I can go back to being just friends after all that.”

His expression shifted to one of concern. “Hmm… I’m not sure… B-But I definitely agree that going back to what we had before would be… er, difficult, to say the least.”

“Got any suggestions?”

“ …Not really. You probably have more experience with this kind of thing than I do.”

“Yeah, hate to break it to you, but I’m also clueless.”

They looked at each other, both in awkward, uncertain silence. She thought about what she wanted from this, what she wanted from him. For starters, she didn’t want this to be the one and only time they did something like this. Such amazing feelings weren’t meant to only be experienced one time. At the same time, she didn’t want to go straight into calling him her boyfriend. As cool as it would be to brag to others that her boyfriend was the prettiest, most perfect prince to ever exist, it also just felt too soon. They needed to go on at least a couple more dates before she would feel comfortable with titles like that. Most importantly, though, she wanted him to come to the light world. She wanted him to be able to experience the sights, the smells, the tastes, all the sensations he could ever want from her home. She took his hand in hers, feeling his impossibly soft fur against her smooth scales.

“I wish you could come to the festival…”

The mood shifted. She said it before she could give it a second thought. The room suddenly felt colder. Ralsei’s expression shifted from one of dreamlike bliss to surprise, then to grief

Goddamnit! Susie thought to herself. Why did I say that? Everything was going so well! It was a perfect moment and I fucking ruined it! What is wrong with me?!

She looked away from him, angry at herself for disturbing the peace. “Sorry. Just… forget I said anything.”

“It’s ok, Susie. I wish I could too…”

The hand she had resting on his back balled into a fist. She wanted to punch herself for saying that. She wanted to ram her head into the wall. A white hot rage burned its way through her in an instant. She was too tired to get angry. All it left in its wake was a smoldering pile of bitterness.

“It’s not fair,” she grumbled. “It’s not fair that you’re stuck here. It’s not fair that you can’t get to know what it’s like up there. It’s not fair that I can’t spend more time with you…”

He reached up with his free hand and put it on her cheek, gently urging her to look at him again. “But that’s why the moments we can spend with each other are so much more special.” He smiled at her. It was genuine, albeit bittersweet. He knew the hard truth just as well as she did.

She let out a heavy sigh, unhappy with that answer. She wished he had said that he knows of a secret technique to allow him into the light world. She wished there was some magical artifact or special item that would let him come with her, even for just a short time. But there wasn’t, and there probably never will be. She squeezed his hand, dreading the inevitable day when holding it again would not be possible. After all, she knew how this story ended now. She knew that, if the prophecy continued on as it was written, any connection the two shared was doomed to fail. Despite all her confidence and determination, breaking the prophecy felt like a monolithic task. A task which she wasn’t sure was even possible. But she wouldn’t get discouraged. She would keep trying to cut herself loose from the strings of fate. If not for herself, then for the one she loved more than any other. For Ralsei.

Susie yawned. She suddenly realized how heavy her eyelids felt and how exhausted she truly was. “I’m beat.”

“Me too,” he said, echoing her yawn. “I suppose I should go back to my room.” He began to slip out from under her arm.

“Nuh uh, you’re not going anywhere mister.” She tightened her grip on him, making sure he stayed.

“Y-You’d prefer I stay here?”

“Dude. We just spent the last like 30 minutes gasping for air cuz we couldn’t stay off each other. The hell would make you think I want you gone now? Plus, you’re like a living plushy. Having you here’ll probably make sleeping easier.”

“Haha, I suppose that’s true. Well…” he snuggled up to her, making sure to put his ear over her chest. “Good night, Susie. And…”

He looked up at her, his eyes shimmering with an unmatched beauty. Like staring into a pond reflecting a night full of stars. In that moment, he was the epicenter of everything. Nothing else ever mattered or will ever matter to her as much as he did. Susie would do anything and everything to protect him, to keep him safe, and to ensure his happiness.

“…Thank you, for making me feel so loved.”

She didn’t care what it took, she would love him for as long as she lived.

“Heh, anytime toothpaste boy.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “And uh… same to you.”